| 1 | %% Image selected per Image Pickin' thread: https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/posts.php?discussion=1304991684029313200 |
| 2 | %% Please do not change or remove without starting a new thread. |
| 3 | %% |
| 4 | [[quoteright:308:[[WesternAnimation/HeyArnold https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/arnoldpass_2707.png]]]] |
| 5 | [[caption-width-right:308:Well, hard to refute that...]] |
| 6 | |
| 7 | ->'''Monty:''' Dad, is there a word to describe answers that are ''completely correct'' but ''entirely useless'' under the circumstances?\ |
| 8 | '''Prof. Jones:''' Yes, yes there is. |
| 9 | -->-- ''Webcomic/IrregularWebcomic'' |
| 10 | |
| 11 | "Could you [[JustForFun/DescribeTopicHere describe Mathematician's Answer here]]?" |
| 12 | |
| 13 | [[SelfDemonstratingArticle Yes]]. |
| 14 | |
| 15 | "...''Would'' you describe it here?" |
| 16 | |
| 17 | Yes. |
| 18 | |
| 19 | "[[{{Beat}} ...]]" |
| 20 | |
| 21 | [[Literature/{{Eragon}} Well, of]] ''[[Literature/{{Eragon}} course]]'' [[Literature/{{Eragon}} I'll describe it to you!]] First you asked me if I ''could'' describe it, then you asked if I ''would'' describe it, [[ExactWords but you never actually asked me to describe the trope to you.]] |
| 22 | |
| 23 | "All right, then. Describe Mathematician's Answer here." |
| 24 | |
| 25 | If you ask someone a question, and they give you an entirely accurate answer that is of no practical use whatsoever, they have just given you a Mathematician's Answer. A common form of this trope is to fully evaluate the logic of the question and give a logically correct answer. Such a response may prove confusing for someone who interpreted what they said colloquially. |
| 26 | |
| 27 | Examples include requests for favors being superficially interpreted as requests for information ("Can you do me a favor?" being interpreted as "Are you ''capable'' of doing me a favor?"). |
| 28 | Such examples are often used in linguistics and philosophy of language to illustrate how context and convention determine implicit meaning: "Do you have any spare pillows?" "Yes. Thank you for asking." People do not usually ask for trivial information or information they already possess, which is how competent speakers know not to provide the Mathematician's Answer. This is also a favorite of English teachers and {{Grammar Nazi}}s, frequently going through something similar to "Can I come in?" "I don't know, ''can you''?" "Uh, '''may''' I come in?". |
| 29 | |
| 30 | Another common form is when a character is asked "Is it A or B?" they will respond "Yes" as if it were a question of Boolean logic rather than clarifying which specific one is the case. This occurs because a question of the form "Is the capital of Australia Melbourne or Canberra?" is ambiguous between "The capital of Australia is either Melbourne or Canberra. Which one is it?" and "Is it the case that the capital of Australia is either Melbourne or Canberra?". A logician may mistake the former for the latter, to the questioner's frustration. Though, they may also answer affirmatively if they know that at least one of those answers is correct but don't know which, or consider all answers correct, or because the second answer is the correct one, and their lack of response to the first is self-explanatory. This crops up a lot in RealLife, especially in the world of computers. On the former interpretation it is also a [[ManyQuestionsFallacy loaded question]], so the askee may legitimately answer "No" (meaning it's none of the stated options) even if the questioner didn't mean it to be a Yes-or-No question. |
| 31 | |
| 32 | A third variant is when a "How?" question (as in "By what method?") is answered with an adverb or adverbial phrase, as if the question had been "In what manner?". For example: "How did you get past the guards?" "[[ItWasntEasy With difficulty]]." |
| 33 | |
| 34 | Can be used by characters for reasons ranging from [[PlayedForLaughs snarky humor]] to intentional obfuscation to being extremely LiteralMinded -- AI and other {{Literal Genie}}s by their nature are very likely to fall into the last category. |
| 35 | |
| 36 | Can overlap with ShapedLikeItself when the question is seeking a description, and with CaptainObvious, as these answers tend to be self-evident for anyone with a brain. Usually doubles as a CrypticallyUnhelpfulAnswer, when the "mathematician" is deliberately trying to confound the questioner. Compare NonAnswer, which is a vague "answer" which does not answer the question at all. Mildly related to WhatsAHenway and NotActuallyTheUltimateQuestion. Can also overlap with ComicallyMissingThePoint if the speaker genuinely thinks they are giving an answer. |
| 37 | |
| 38 | The trope name comes from a family of jokes about the supposed habit of mathematicians to make unhelpful answers. For example: a man in a hot-air balloon asked someone where he was. "You're in a balloon", he answered. The rider concluded that it was a mathematician that said that, because the answer was perfectly correct and completely useless. (The joke sometimes continues with the mathematician deducing that the man in the balloon is a [[PointyHairedBoss manager]], because he has risen to his position with a lot of hot air, has no idea where he is or where he is going, and yet claims this is the fault of the innocent person standing below him.) |
| 39 | |
| 40 | A final variation is also common -- when given two seemingly contradictory possibilities and asked which is the case, to answer "yes". It is a somewhat snarky way to say that both are true, and that it is not in fact a contradiction. |
| 41 | |
| 42 | AllOfThem is a subtrope that's its own {{Stock Phrase|s}}, as an answer to a question of quantity. See also WhatsAHenway. Contrast ImpliedAnswer when the question isn't answered at all, and the meaning is quite clear. Often the answer is TriviallyObvious. Related to RhetoricalQuestionBlunder: the person who was asked gives a logical answer that ruins the spirit of the question. Compare and contrast NoWrongAnswersExceptThatOne. Compare to LyingByOmission, where the omission is more intentional and less a matter of a literal answer to a vague question. |
| 43 | |
| 44 | May be a feature of AntiHumor when given as the punchline to a joke. Compare AskAStupidQuestion and LiteralistSnarking. A well-known example is the ChickenJoke: "Why did the chicken cross the road?" "To get to the other side." |
| 45 | ---- |
| 46 | !!Examples: |
| 47 | |
| 48 | [[foldercontrol]] |
| 49 | |
| 50 | [[folder:Advertising]] |
| 51 | * A commercial for Lyrica begins with a voiceover along the lines of: "I was wondering why I had muscle pain, so I asked my doctor. It turns out, connected to muscles are nerves which send pain messages to the brain." |
| 52 | ** This may be a rare example of an unintentional Mathematician's Answer. The idea could be to inform the audience that pain doesn't ''just'' exist in the pained part of the body, and that not all treatment of pain actually has to directly affect the pained part (something which may seem obvious to most people -- especially if you know about phantom pain -- but not to everyone). |
| 53 | * A beer commercial has a guy describe something as beautiful, refreshing, etc. as he grabs a beer near a woman. The woman asks him if he's describing the beer or her; his reply is, "Yes." |
| 54 | * A commercial for Grey Poupon mustard has one Rolls-Royce pull up to another, and they both roll down their windows. One man asks, "Pardon me, do you have any Grey Poupon?" The other replies, "But of course!" -- then signals his chauffeur to drive away. |
| 55 | * A Nike "Find Your Greatness" spot goes something like this: "Is it speed or endurance? Does it happen in two hours or four or six? Is it finishing strong or barely finishing? Yes." "It" is ostensibly greatness. |
| 56 | * A series of ads for AT&T feature a man talking to young children in a kindergarten classroom. Here's one of the exchanges: |
| 57 | --> '''Man''': Are you competing for cutest kid right now?\ |
| 58 | '''Girl''': Yes.\ |
| 59 | '''Man''': What place are you in?\ |
| 60 | '''Girl''': Kindergarten?\ |
| 61 | '''Man''': That's adorable. |
| 62 | * A board advertisement for UsefulNotes/McDonalds late-night menu has this gem: "Late dinner or breakfast? Yes." |
| 63 | ** In one of the ''Ronald & Me'' commercials, Ronald, teaching mathematics, puts a different number of potatoes in each of his pants pockets and asks the kids what he has now. His pants fall down, and one of the potatoes answers "Really heavy pants." |
| 64 | [[/folder]] |
| 65 | |
| 66 | [[folder:Anime & Manga]] |
| 67 | * ''Manga/KenichiTheMightiestDisciple'' example! |
| 68 | --> '''Random guy on the beach:''' Hey, beautiful, where are you from?\ |
| 69 | '''[[NoSocialSkills Shigure]]:''' My... home. |
| 70 | * From the English dub of ''Anime/LupinIII'': |
| 71 | --> '''Lupin:''' Which direction do you think the helicopter will be coming from?\ |
| 72 | '''Goemon:''' Up. |
| 73 | * ''Manga/RurouniKenshin'' has one of these during the Jinchu Arc: |
| 74 | -->'''Chou:''' So who are we goin' after? The Boss? Or Battousai? \ |
| 75 | '''Saito:''' Yes. |
| 76 | * ''Manga/{{Bleach}}'': When a very young Uryuu asks his father why he hates being a Quincy, Ryuuken replies "because there's no money in it", leaving Uryuu so shocked and troubled that he runs to his grandfather in tears, asking if Ryuuken's answer is a truth or lie. Souken points out that, because Ryuuken has a family to raise, it can be viewed as truthful. In fact, Ryuuken is telling the truth from any angle - being Quincy never pays the bills regardless of whether or not there's a family to raise. However, Uryuu wants to know why Ryuuken hates being a Quincy, yet neither Ryuuken nor Souken actually answer that question. They both sidestep it completely. |
| 77 | * Jonah in ''Manga/{{Jormungand}}'' is awful at math, so when he's basically asked 22 times 3 while the Logistics crew are at an airport, he answers "A bunch." |
| 78 | * ''Manga/FairyTail'': During Lucy's fight with Byro, her opponent uses a concoction that causes him to transform into a giant octopus. |
| 79 | -->'''Lucy:''' What the heck is that!?\ |
| 80 | '''Virgo:''' An octopus tentacle. |
| 81 | * This exchange in ''Literature/HaruhiSuzumiya'', when the group encounters a ''giant'' cricket in an alternate dimension: |
| 82 | -->'''Kyon''': What is that!?\ |
| 83 | '''Koizumi''': A camel cricket.\ |
| 84 | '''Kyon''': Got it. Thanks, CaptainObvious. |
| 85 | * In ''Manga/MyHeroAcademia'', Todoroki somehow manages to completely refurbish his dorm room, making it look like it was taken wholesale out of a traditional Japanese house, complete with tatami mat flooring and a ''shoji'' door replacing the sliding glass door out to the veranda. His classmates ask how he was able to do it all in under a day entirely by himself. Todoroki's response? "I worked really hard." |
| 86 | * In ''Manga/{{Chobits}}'', Hideki and Chi receive a mysterious file with a map attached. Hideki wonders out loud what it is, and Sumomo declares that she knows, announcing that it's a file attachment. Hideki gets annoyed but Shinbo explains that Sumomo is a less advanced persocom who [[SlidingScaleOfRobotIntelligence has trouble grasping abstract concepts like that]]. |
| 87 | * Kotaro of ''Anime/ZombieLandSaga'' uses these to handwave any big questions. How did he raise the seven girls from the dead? Well, just like in a zombie movie! Why are they alive after they died? Well they're zombies, duh! Does he know what the population of Saga is? Of course he does, it's ''small!'' Needless to say, the girls are very frustrated by this. |
| 88 | * A typical line from Rotom Dex in ''Anime/PokemonTheSeriesSunAndMoon'' does this whenever forced to choose between two or more equal probabilities. "I calculate a 50% chance that our friends went this way, and a 50% chance that they went this other way!" Other characters are quick to point out that he's not being very helpful, assuming they don't just ignore him entirely. |
| 89 | * In ''Manga/AsteroidInLove'', Mai gives one when Mira noticed she is holding two maps when they [[NewYearHasCome visit the shrine at new year's]]: |
| 90 | -->'''Mira''': Hey, Ino. Are those...?\ |
| 91 | '''Mai''': They're maps!\ |
| 92 | '''Mira''': Yeah, I know that! What I meant was... why do you have two? |
| 93 | [[/folder]] |
| 94 | |
| 95 | [[folder:Audio Plays]] |
| 96 | * ''Radio/AdventuresInOdyssey'': In ''The Ties That Bind'', Hadley gives these to all of the questions Detective Polehaus asks when he tries to get a description of the person who broke into Wooton's house. [[spoiler:This is the first bit of foreshadowing that there was no break-in.]] |
| 97 | * ''AudioPlay/BertAndI'': A common element of the humor. |
| 98 | ** "You're in a balloon, you damned fool" is the punchline to "The Lighter Than Air Balloon". |
| 99 | ** From "Arthur Bunker Testifies": "You live there all your life?" "Not yet." |
| 100 | ** From "Not Just Yet": "Where is your wife?" "She's out t'the graveyard." (She died eight years ago.) |
| 101 | ** Pretty much all of "Directions". "Where does this road go?" "Don't go nowhere, Mister. Stays right here." |
| 102 | * In ''AudioPlay/IThinkWereAllBozosOnThisBus'', when the Clem-clone asks "How are you, Doctor?" Dr. Memory replies in a flat monotone: "The Doctor is on." |
| 103 | * In ''Radio/TheGoonShow'' episode, "The Lost Emperor", young Neddie Seagoon is working in the Victoria and Albert Museum late at night when Moriarty and Grytpype come in and pull a gun on him. |
| 104 | --> '''Grytpype:''' Draw the curtain Moriarty. Now then is there anyone else in the building apart from you?\ |
| 105 | '''Seagoon:''' Yes, two others.\ |
| 106 | '''Grytpype:''' What are they doing?\ |
| 107 | '''Seagoon:''' Holding me up with a pistol. |
| 108 | [[/folder]] |
| 109 | |
| 110 | [[folder:Comic Books]] |
| 111 | * From ''ComicBook/XStatix'': "He's... "connecting" in some way to what he's lost." "Is that a good or bad thing?" "Yes." |
| 112 | * ComicBook/LuckyLuke's horse, Jolly Jumper, can speak but, seeing as he is still a horse, even Luke is baffled when he sees Jolly on the riverbank, fishing. |
| 113 | -->'''Lucky Luke:''' How you took your saddle off, we won't discuss. But how did you put the worm on the hook?\ |
| 114 | '''Jolly Jumper:''' With a shudder, like everyone else. |
| 115 | * In one ''ComicBook/BigBangComics'' story, the Quizmaster is trying to get the Knight Watchman to reveal his secret identity -- by having him play 20 questions while hooked up to a lie detector, and killing his sidekick Kid Galahad if he lies! For his first question, he asks the Watchman whom he would be if he weren't wearing his costume. The Watchman replies "I can truthfully say that I would still be myself!" |
| 116 | ** The Watchman tries to give a similar answer to the question "Who is Kid Galahad, in reality?"; he manages to avoid the answer the Quizmaster wanted, but is forced to give away ''some'' information: "In all earnestness I'll have to tell you that he's really my nephew!" He had a similar smartass answer for the question "What are your secret identities?", but Kid Galahad escaped and took the Quizmaster out of commission before he could give it. |
| 117 | * From ''ComicBook/{{Deadpool}}'' Vol. 2 #34: |
| 118 | -->'''Deadpool:''' I just figured out how to kill this "Id" thing.\ |
| 119 | '''Kak:''' How?\ |
| 120 | '''Deadpool:''' With my ''brain''. Duh. |
| 121 | * ''ComicBook/SpiderMan'': In the ''ComicBook/{{Civil War|2006}}'' issues of ''ComicBook/TheAmazingSpiderManJMichaelStraczynski'', ComicBook/IronMan gives Spider-Man [[DiscussedTrope a lecture about using this kind of answer]] when dealing with lawyers, government entities, and other officials. |
| 122 | ** Also invoked when Peter is presented with a scenario where his powers are the result of him being chosen by a mystical spider-totem rather than a spider that was mutated by radiation; a shaman who was helping Peter deal with the aftermath of his latest crisis offered one of these, comparing the situation to the idea that the sun will rise because of gravity and mathematics to the idea that it will come up because it's ''meant'' to come up, neither of which have to exclude the other. |
| 123 | * ''ComicBook/SuicideSquad'' #16 |
| 124 | -->'''Vixen''': Where's the Colonel?\ |
| 125 | '''Bronze Tiger''': With Shade.\ |
| 126 | '''Vixen''': Where's Shade?\ |
| 127 | '''Bronze Tiger''': With the Colonel.\ |
| 128 | '''Vixen''': [[ParentheticalSwearing How zen.]] |
| 129 | * In Part 7 of ''ComicBook/SonicTheHedgehogMegaManWorldsCollide'', Orbot informs Drs. Eggman and Wily that they've lost Shadow Man: |
| 130 | -->'''Dr. Eggman''': Wait, my Shadow Man [the roboticized version of Shadow the Hedgehog] or your Shadow Man [the ''VideoGame/MegaMan3'' boss]?\ |
| 131 | '''Orbot''': Yes. \ |
| 132 | ''(Dr. Eggman [[DopeSlap slaps]] Orbot)'' |
| 133 | * In ComicBook/TheAvengers and ''ComicBook/TheInfinityGauntlet'', after ComicBook/TheMightyThor points out how ComicBook/{{Hawkeye}}'s arrows would be nothing more than an annoying trifle to the android that copied his Asgardian strength, Hawkeye tells ComicBook/ScarletWitch to prepare a hex attack. When Wanda asks if he wanted her to attack the android or Thor, Hawkeye simply says "Yes." |
| 134 | * In an issue of the ''WesternAnimation/{{Animaniacs}}'' ComicBookAdaptation, Yakko takes things in this direction when he and his sibs are being interviewed on a TV talk show. |
| 135 | -->'''Reporter:''' Can I talk to you first, Yakko?\ |
| 136 | '''Yakko:''' I don't know, can you?\ |
| 137 | '''Reporter:''' Uh, tell us about some of your outrageous exploits.\ |
| 138 | '''Yakko:''' I don't have any ex-ploits. [[{{Pun}} All of my ploits are still ploits!]]\ |
| 139 | '''Reporter:''' No, no! Tell us what you've been doing.\ |
| 140 | '''Yakko:''' Well, [[ShapedLikeItself I've been talking to you]]. |
| 141 | * In issue 3 of ''ComicBook/LokiAgentOfAsgard'', when the title character appears at a speed-date dressed like their usual self, the woman sitting across from them asks if they're dressed for a con(vention). Their response? "There's always a con going on somewhere." |
| 142 | ** Issue 5 has the Loki of a possible future answer this to a question regarding what happens to Midgard: "T'was governed most perfectly. By my reckoning." Later it turned out that ''they'' are ruling Earth in that timeline. [[spoiler:They also happened to kill off every living being on the planet just to spite Thor.]] Well, no incarnation of Loki was ever humble. |
| 143 | ** This trope is pretty much Loki's most benign setting; at least he isn't in a {{manipulati|veBastard}}ng mood (yet). |
| 144 | * In ''ComicBook/TheSandman1989'', when Gilbert is asked whether that is his first or last name, he replies "Indubitably. I could not have put it better myself." His full name is eventually revealed to be [[spoiler:Fiddler's Green]]. |
| 145 | * In issue #1 of ''ComicBook/{{Rick and Morty|Oni}}'', Rick invents a device that guarantees them infinite amounts of money in the stock market. Morty is unsure of whether or not it's legal, to which Rick responds with: "I'm completely aware of how legal it is, Morty!" |
| 146 | * ''ComicBook/TheFabulousFurryFreakBrothers:'' While driving through Mexico, Franklin is asked where they are. He replies "Directly above the centre of the earth." |
| 147 | * In ''ComicBook/MightyMorphinPowerRangersTeenageMutantNinjaTurtles'', Billy asks Splinter whether he's a rat who became a person or a person who became a rat. Splinter answers "Exactly". |
| 148 | [[/folder]] |
| 149 | |
| 150 | [[folder:Comic Strips]] |
| 151 | * One ''ComicStrip/BigNate'' strip has Nate asking his science teacher, Mr. Galvin, how old he is. Mr. Galvin responds that he was born during the Holocene Epoch (basically the human era). |
| 152 | * ''ComicStrip/BloomCounty'' has one in its first series about the Presidential election. Trying to find a local candidate, Milo asks the bum Limekiller "How do you stand on nuclear waste?" Limekiller immediately begins balancing awkwardly on one foot, earning Milo's approval. |
| 153 | * ''ComicStrip/CalvinAndHobbes'' featured this exchange in a Sunday strip: |
| 154 | -->'''Miss Wormwood''': Calvin, pay attention! We're studying geography! [[WhereTheHellIsSpringfield Now, what state do you live in?]]\ |
| 155 | '''Calvin''': Denial.\ |
| 156 | '''Miss Wormwood''':[[ActuallyPrettyFunny ...I don't suppose I can argue with THAT.]] |
| 157 | ** And in a weekday strip: |
| 158 | -->''[Calvin and Hobbes are sitting under a tree.]''\ |
| 159 | '''Calvin:''' Why are we here?\ |
| 160 | '''Hobbes:''' Because we walked here.\ |
| 161 | '''Calvin:''' No, I mean here on Earth.\ |
| 162 | '''Hobbes:''' Because Earth can support life.\ |
| 163 | '''Calvin:''' No, why are we ''anywhere''? Why do we exist?\ |
| 164 | '''Hobbes:''' Because we were born.\ |
| 165 | '''Calvin''' ''(angry)'': Forget it.\ |
| 166 | '''Hobbes''' ''(just as angry)'': I will, thank you. |
| 167 | * ''ComicStrip/{{Peanuts}}'': |
| 168 | ** Schroeder is injured by a foul ball while playing baseball. When Charlie Brown asks him if he can still play, Schroeder runs home and pounds out a Beethoven sonata on his toy piano while still wearing his catcher's mask. |
| 169 | ---> '''Schroeder''': It's all right. I can still play.\ |
| 170 | '''Charlie Brown''': That isn't exactly what I meant. |
| 171 | ** Peppermint Patty has to write a report on ''Theatre/{{Hamlet}}''. Her report begins "A hamlet is a small village with a population of maybe a few hundred and ..." |
| 172 | ** One story has Charlie Brown getting knocked unconscious, then waking up in an unfamiliar neighborhood with two small children he's never seen before staring at him. When Charlie Brown asks where he is, the girl points to where he's sitting and says, "Right there!" |
| 173 | * ''ComicStrip/{{Mafalda}}'' has Libertad unknowingly doing this to Susanita. |
| 174 | --> '''Susanita''': So, what does your dad do?\ |
| 175 | '''Libertad''': He doesn't know.\ |
| 176 | '''Susanita''': He doesn't know?\ |
| 177 | '''Libertad''': "I don't know what I do there" he always says.\ |
| 178 | '''Susanita''': "There" where?\ |
| 179 | '''Libertad''': "In that stall" he says.\ |
| 180 | '''Susanita''': What kind of stall?!\ |
| 181 | '''Libertad''': "Awful" he says. |
| 182 | * ''ComicStrip/{{Garfield}}'': The June 8, 2011 strip has this. |
| 183 | --> '''Nermal''': I don't understand why you don't like me, Garfield. [[CuteKitten Is it because I'm cute]]? Or lovable? Or angelic? [[OverlyLongGag Or endearing? Or precious? Or young? Or personable? Or spunky? Or clever?]] |
| 184 | --> '''Garfield''': Yes. |
| 185 | ** [[https://www.gocomics.com/garfield/2023/06/29 The June 29, 2023 strip]] has this as well. |
| 186 | --> '''Garfield''': Cats...Do we want to go out...or do we want to come in? The answer is yes. |
| 187 | * In ''ComicStrip/PhoebeAndHerUnicorn'', this is [[http://www.gocomics.com/phoebe-and-her-unicorn/2017/06/02 Phoebe's response]] when Marigold tells her that although Dakota is a goblin princess, the position is purely ceremonial. |
| 188 | -->'''Phoebe:''' So Dakota is basically a glorified mascot? I have to tell her!\ |
| 189 | '''Marigold:''' Out of kindness, or to see her pained, startled expression?\ |
| 190 | '''Phoebe:''' Yes. |
| 191 | [[/folder]] |
| 192 | |
| 193 | [[folder:Fan Works]] |
| 194 | * ''Fanfic/AssassinationAcademia'': After Izuku defends Irina/Bitch-sensei, Hitoshi remarks that Izuku is too kind for his own good. Izuku isn't sure how he means that, and Hitoshi refuses to clarify: |
| 195 | -->'''Izuku:''' You shouldn’t call your teacher a bitch, even if she does act like one at times, you know. It's not very nice.\ |
| 196 | '''Hitoshi:''' Sometimes, Midoriya, you can be too nice.\ |
| 197 | '''Izuku:''' Uh...is that supposed to be an insult or a compliment?\ |
| 198 | '''Hitoshi:''' Yes. |
| 199 | * ''Fanfic/BoldoresAndBoomsticks'': Employed by Casey when she attempts to explain that Team Rocket's behavior isn't all that unusual for them: |
| 200 | -->'''Casey:''' Yeah... Team Rocket just... ''does'' that. Like, all the time.\ |
| 201 | '''Yang:''' Exploding for no reason, or the threatening poetry?\ |
| 202 | '''Casey:''' ...Yes. |
| 203 | * ''Fanfic/CSIDeathByChocolate'': A bouncer warns Greg that if he turns out to be a "just another one of those perverts" out to harass Violet Beauregard over her condition, he won't even have to worry about the bouncer turning him out, as she'll break his neck himself. |
| 204 | -->'''Bouncer:''' I think she's a black belt or something.\ |
| 205 | '''Greg:''' Karate? Judo, Jujitsu?\ |
| 206 | '''Bouncer:''' Yes. |
| 207 | * ''Fanfic/ChaosTheoryZ'': From Chapter 1: |
| 208 | -->'''[[RobotBuddy Isco]]''': Should I be annoyed that you didn’t suggest using me? It would be rather easy for me to eliminate the pain receptacles.\ |
| 209 | '''[[SelfInsertFic Kayos]]''': Are you calling them pain receptacles or suggesting that’s what you’d remove from them?\ |
| 210 | '''Isco''': Yes. |
| 211 | * ''Fanfic/ColosseumOfTheHeart'': |
| 212 | ** When Kairi asks her new Pokémon whether Ralts is her name or her species, she answers "Yes!", then translates that Riku's Larvitar says yes as well. |
| 213 | --->'''Ralts:''' About being called Larvitar, that is. It'd be silly if he was called Ralts. |
| 214 | ** This exchange, regarding Ash's Shadow Metang: |
| 215 | --->'''Bonnie''': Ash, it's a battle junkie. Every fight you throw it into, it's like a rampaging Tauros.\ |
| 216 | '''Ash''': Hey, they're not that bad!\ |
| 217 | '''Serena''': Metang or Tauros?\ |
| 218 | '''Ash''': Yes. |
| 219 | * ''Fanfic/ConnectingTheDots'': After being accidentally transported to another dimension, Kiba is unfortunate enough to encounter [[ConspiracyTheorist the Question]] first. When Huntress discovers them, well... |
| 220 | -->'''Huntress:''' Just tell me why [Kiba] is in his boxers.\ |
| 221 | '''Question:''' Because I took off his pants. |
| 222 | * ''Fanfic/DostThouEvenStealHearts'': From Chapter 81, when some of Joker's allies are cowed at seeing [[spoiler:Margaret]] summon the Persona Satan: |
| 223 | -->'''Mr. Compress''': Hey Eraserhead, how many heroes would soil themselves if Joker fought you with ''that''?”\ |
| 224 | '''Aizawa''': ...Yes. |
| 225 | * ''Fanfic/ExcitingOpportunities'': When asked whether she's from Ordos Xenos, Malleus, or Hereticus, Inquisitor Loghain simply replies "Yes." |
| 226 | * When Professor [=McGonagall=] finds out that [[Franchise/TheSlenderManMythos Slender Man]] (disguised as a human) is OlderThanHeLooks in ''[[https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11208933/23/Harry-by-Proxy Harry By Proxy]]'', she wonders just how old he is. |
| 227 | -->'''Slender Man:''' And what age do you think I am?\ |
| 228 | '''Professor [=McGonagall=]:''' Perhaps 30. or 35.\ |
| 229 | '''Slender Man:''' Quite flattering, madame.\ |
| 230 | '''Professor [=McGonagall=]:''' You're older?!\ |
| 231 | '''Slender Man:''' I'm as old as my tongue and a little older than my teeth. |
| 232 | * ''Fanfic/HowTheLightGetsIn'': After Oliver learns that Edie [[spoiler:arranged Laurel's murder]], we get this exchange |
| 233 | -->'''Oliver:''' How do we kill a witch?\ |
| 234 | '''Castiel:''' ''(deadpan)'' With precision. |
| 235 | * A minor RunningGag of [[Literature/HaruhiSuzumiya Yuki Nagato]] in ''Fanfic/KyonBigDamnHero'' ([[ItMakesSenseInContext examples make much more sense in context]]): |
| 236 | -->''(Haruhi, Yuki and Kanae forcibly redress Kyon up into a costume)''\ |
| 237 | '''Kyon''': Y... Yuki! Kanae-chan! Come on! H... help me- Waaah! Help me out!\ |
| 238 | '''Yuki''': I am helping.\ |
| 239 | ... |
| 240 | -->'''Kyon:''' ''(upon waking up to find Yuki waking up in his bed)'' Um... Good morning?\ |
| 241 | '''Yuki''': Yes.\ |
| 242 | ... |
| 243 | -->'''Haruhi:''' Now keep Kyon off me for a minute!\ |
| 244 | ''(Yuki immobilizes Kyon out of sheer embarrassment by hugging him tightly)''\ |
| 245 | '''Haruhi:''' Done! ''(turns around, realization hits)'' Er, er, good work. Um, more emotion next time, Yuki, and then we'll have that sequel down solidly!\ |
| 246 | '''Yuki:''' Good.\ |
| 247 | '''Haruhi:''' That means you can let go!\ |
| 248 | '''Yuki:''' Understood.\ |
| 249 | '''Haruhi:''' That means ''let'' go! |
| 250 | * In ''Fanfic/TheNightUnfurls'', a [[GiantMook brute]] is in shocked disbelief after Kyril [[AnArmAndALeg lobs one of his arms off]], saying that [[ThisCannotBe he wasn't supposed to do that]]. Kyril replies, "Aye"[[note]]which means "yes"[[/note]], before [[OffWithHisHead beheading]] him. |
| 251 | * ''Fanfic/SuperheroRPF'' has several, courtesy of Sassgardian aka [[spoiler:Loki]]: |
| 252 | -->'''Kate''': It's the horns. You look like you're either going for an evil Satanic sorcerer thing, or you're trying to make a very terrible pun about your current mood.\ |
| 253 | '''Sassgardian''': ''Well. Yes.'' |
| 254 | ** Or in an anonymous forum where Anon 1 is also presumably him when talking about [[FloatingContinent Asgardia]]: |
| 255 | --->'''Anon 1''': If they can figure out how to get into a city that sits twenty feet above the plain.\ |
| 256 | '''Anon 2''': alright. how do you get in then?\ |
| 257 | '''Anon 1''': ''Through the front door.'' |
| 258 | * ''WebAnimation/TurnaboutStorm'': After a ridiculously laconic testimony by one of the witnesses, [[Franchise/AceAttorney Phoenix]] struggles to get any useful information out of her. When he asks her about what she was doing near the crime scene in the first place, the prosecution interrupts: |
| 259 | -->'''[[WesternAnimation/MyLittlePonyFriendshipIsMagic Trixie]]:''' We already know what she was doing there. She was observing the crime. |
| 260 | * ''Fanfic/AbsoluteTrust'': In Chapter 21, after Avatar Kyoshi buries three of the Rough Rhinos beneath a boulder: |
| 261 | -->'''Sokka''': Did she bury them, or mush them into paste?\ |
| 262 | '''Alec''': Yes. |
| 263 | * ''Fanfic/APosseAdEsse'', after SecretWeapon Dub gets himself in the shit: |
| 264 | -->'''Dolly:''' Oh god, that's e'en worse. Dub, dae ye e'en remember whit ye are?\ |
| 265 | '''Dub:''' Yeah, I'm a turtle. |
| 266 | * In the ''Fanfic/SkyholdAcademyYearbook'' installment ''Love is a Mystery'', before the gender of a pregnant staff member's baby is revealed, [[VideoGame/DragonAgeII Hawke]] informs the expectant parents what each of their colleagues bet would be the result. Four of them bet it would be a girl; five said it would be a boy; and [[VideoGame/DragonAgeInquisition Bull]] decided to hedge his bets and say it would be twins. She then adds that she herself should win the bet because... |
| 267 | -->'''Hawke:''' I bet coin that you're having a baby. |
| 268 | * Done nicely in [[http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6209921/1/Harry_Dresden_Comedic_Shorts this]] collection of comedic shorts: |
| 269 | -->'''Murphy:''' Okay, first case. We have several murders to get to.\ |
| 270 | '''Dresden''': Solving or causing?\ |
| 271 | '''Murphy''': ''(growling)'' Yes. |
| 272 | * In an [[http://puzzle-dragon.tumblr.com/post/112269867819/so-this-is-a-thing-for-just-a-h3artbeat-away-to untitled]] fic, Bunny and Alistair use this trope to flirt. |
| 273 | -->'''Alistair:''' A kiss?\ |
| 274 | '''Bunny:''' Was that an answer or a question?\ |
| 275 | '''Alistair:''' Yes. Was that a riddle or an invitation?\ |
| 276 | '''Bunny:''' Yes. |
| 277 | * In ''[[https://www.fanfiction.net/s/4780695/2/A-Collection-of-Harmonious-OneShots A Collection of Harmonious OneShots]]'' Hermione downs an entire 32-ounce steak. |
| 278 | -->'''Harry:''' How the hell did you eat that?\ |
| 279 | '''Hermione:''' Well, I cut it into bite-sized pieces, then I put them, one at a time, into my mouth- |
| 280 | * ''[[https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11847770/7/Mark-Me Mark Me]]'': |
| 281 | -->'''Madame Bones:''' Did you intentionally prevent Sirius Black from having a trial?\ |
| 282 | '''Dumbledore:''' Yes.\ |
| 283 | '''Madame Bones:''' Why?\ |
| 284 | '''Dumbledore:''' The twenty-fifth letter of the alphabet. |
| 285 | * ''[[https://www.fanfiction.net/s/7326097/2/Missing-from-Number-Four Missing from Number Four]]'': |
| 286 | -->'''Remus:''' Where have you been?\ |
| 287 | '''Harry:''' At school. Ask me another; I'm getting really good at answering these questions without giving any answers. |
| 288 | * In ''[[http://archiveofourown.org/works/10859928/chapters/24140685 Ninja Wizard Book 2]]'' the Heads of House discover Harry and his friends' secret hideout. |
| 289 | -->'''Snape:''' Potter, what is the meaning of this?\ |
| 290 | '''Harry:''' It's a general term to indicate a thing near to you. |
| 291 | * In ''[[http://archiveofourown.org/works/689909/chapters/1290039 The Spellmaker]]'' Harry asks about a loan at Gringotts while shopping for his first-year school supplies, only to be told he doesn't need one. |
| 292 | -->'''Harry:''' If the school doesn't think I need a loan, then that means I have money, yes? How do I have money?\ |
| 293 | '''Goblin teller:''' The bank stores all your valuables and assets, but you may remove and make use of them as you see fit, which makes them in essence your possessions. |
| 294 | * In Chapter 16 of ''Yet Hope Still Remains'', Cornelius Fudge tries to make Harry reveal the whereabouts of Sirius Black and Remus Lupin. Harry answers "Earth". Later in the chapter, Harry gives a more specific answer: Europe. |
| 295 | * ''Fanfic/KingdomHeartsPsiTheSeekerOfDarkness'': In ''[[https://archiveofourown.org/works/14890610 Land of Oblivion]]'', when Kairi tells Aqua about how she, Sora and Riku started their relationship: |
| 296 | -->'''Kairi''': The hard part was getting Riku to admit he liked both of us. We actually had to pin him down so he wouldn't leave.\ |
| 297 | '''Aqua''': Literally or figuratively?\ |
| 298 | '''Kairi''': Yes. |
| 299 | ** The prequel story ''[[https://archiveofourown.org/works/31197581 Equilateral]]'' reveals that she wasn't kidding. |
| 300 | * ''Fanfic/LincolnsMemories'': One of Luan Loud's jokes in "Lincoln's Seventh Birthday" is "What do you call a flamingo at the North Pole? Lost!". |
| 301 | * ''Fanfic/IfIOnlyHadAHeart'': After spending several days building several worker robots, Izuku responds to Mashi asking him when the last time he slept was by saying "I've slept... recently..." |
| 302 | * ''Fanfic/{{Live a Hero|MHA}}'' has this exchange when Izuku and Kirishima are studying. |
| 303 | -->'''Izuku:''' [[BrutalHonesty Your grades are terrible.]]\ |
| 304 | '''Kirishima:''' I know that! ''(runs his hands through his hair)'' That's why I'm here!\ |
| 305 | '''Izuku:''' ...Hey, Kirishima, I think I found out what your problem is.\ |
| 306 | '''Kirishima:''' Really? ''(peers over Izuku's shoulder)'' What is it? What's wrong?\ |
| 307 | '''Izuku:''' ''(flips the notebook around and points at it with a pencil)'' All these answers are wrong.\ |
| 308 | '''Kirishima:''' DAGNABBIT MIDORIYA I KNOW THAT!! ''(buries his face in his hands)'' JUST TELL ME HOW TO FIX IT!! |
| 309 | * In ''Fanfic/ChrysalisVisitsTheHague'', the defense attorney Estermann proposes the idea that the prosecutor is bluffing. His secretary Garibaldi asks if it means she's got an ace up her sleeve or if she's actually running on empty. |
| 310 | -->''Estermann frowned on the inside. His answer was as cryptic to him as it was to his aide and his client. "...Yes."'' |
| 311 | * In ''[[Fanfic/TheNuptialverse Families]]'', most of the answers [[AncientKeeper the Keeper]] gives to Twilight are this. This is partially because she's not allowed to give straightforward answers, and partially because [[{{Troll}} it's fun]]. |
| 312 | * ''Fanfic/TealovesSteamyAdventure'' uses this twice. |
| 313 | ** As Tealove wonders what her new traveling companion, Minty, is: |
| 314 | --->'''Tealove:''' But what are you really? Are you a ticket that can turn into a pony, or a pony that can turn into a ticket?\ |
| 315 | '''Minty:''' Yes, exactly! |
| 316 | ** In the cave troll's lair: |
| 317 | --->White Pony: Oaf? Oh, you mean the cave troll? Big Jim isn't an oaf! He's a real sweetheart. You just have to try to understand him.\ |
| 318 | '''Big Jim:''' GRUUUUUUUUUH. ''(scratches his armpit)''\ |
| 319 | '''Tealove:''' Okay. Help us understand him. What did he just say?\ |
| 320 | '''White Pony:''' ''(considers for a moment)'' He said 'Gruh'. |
| 321 | * ''Fanfic/WhiteEyes'': When Team Seven encounters Orochimaru and his giant snake summon inside the Forest of Death: |
| 322 | -->'''Naruto:''' Is it me or does it look hungry?\ |
| 323 | '''Sasuke:''' The ninja or the snake?\ |
| 324 | '''Naruto:''' Yes. |
| 325 | * ''Fanfic/DoingItRightThisTime'': After Shinji, Asuka and Rei [[PeggySue travel back in time]], they gradually let others in on what's going on. |
| 326 | -->'''Toji''': Aw, hell, what part of this ''isn't'' weird?\ |
| 327 | '''Asuka''': The time travel, or me not being a bitch?\ |
| 328 | '''Toji''': Yes. |
| 329 | * ''Fanfic/ThisBites'': Abundant in the story, and perhaps even more abundant out of it; the three authors, [[TrollingCreator Trolling Creators]] that they are, have a tendency to use this to answer fans' questions about what's going to happen. |
| 330 | * In ''[[https://archiveofourown.org/works/24514813/chapters/61085245 Weakness]]'', Luz finds out Fanfiction Girl is writing a new food fanfiction about a vampire mint chocolate chip ice-cream cone that's in love with a garlic growing in a garden, [[StarCrossedLovers but can't go outside without melting]]. When Luz asks if the ice-cream vampire will melt because she's a vampire or because she's ice-cream, Fanfiction Girl merely answers yes. |
| 331 | * ''Fanfic/TheManyQuirksOfPhantomThievery'': After Makoto reluctantly confides in Akira about Haru's ArrangedMarriage, Akira tells her that if the other Thieves agree, they'll reveal their secret to Haru and go after her wicked fiancé: |
| 332 | -->'''Futaba''': Sojiro Mona and me were listening in. It’s a unanimous yes on our end. Also, he says to watch your language.\ |
| 333 | '''Akira''': Sojiro, Mona, or you?\ |
| 334 | '''Futaba''': Yes. |
| 335 | * ''Fanfic/TheKingNobodyWanted:'' Garth Tyrell tells a visitor to the royal court that he knows her backstory is a lie, and asks who her mother really is. |
| 336 | -->'''Uthera Ruari:''' The woman who bore my sister and I to my father. |
| 337 | * It happens in ''Literature/TheSilmarillion'' fanfic ''Fanfic/ABoyAGirlAndADogTheLeithianScript'' when a Feanor's partisan starts asking questions without explaining what he's talking about. |
| 338 | -->'''Warden of Aglon:''' ''(impatient)'' Well?\ |
| 339 | '''Captain:''' ''(shaking his head)'' This again! Well, what?\ |
| 340 | '''Warden of Aglon:''' Aren't you going to say anything else?\ |
| 341 | '''Captain:''' ''(bemused)'' Almost certainly. It's rather a habit, I'm afraid. |
| 342 | * ''Fanfic/AThingOfVikings'': In Chapter 40, after Heather and Fishlegs have a long-overdue discussion about their relationship: |
| 343 | -->'''Fishlegs''': Can I kiss you?\ |
| 344 | ''[cue BigDamnKiss]''\ |
| 345 | '''Heather''': You seem capable. But you don't have to ask me for permission to kiss me, Fishlegs, unless I tell you otherwise. |
| 346 | [[/folder]] |
| 347 | |
| 348 | [[folder:Films — Animated]] |
| 349 | * The CGI film ''WesternAnimation/BeeMovie'' has a scene between a human woman and a talking bee: |
| 350 | -->'''Vanessa''': How did you learn to do that?\ |
| 351 | '''Barry B. Benson''': Do what?\ |
| 352 | '''Vanessa''': That, that... the talking thing?\ |
| 353 | '''Barry B. Benson''': Same way you did, I guess. Mama, dada, honey, you pick it up. |
| 354 | * In ''WesternAnimation/ShrekTheThird'', Pinocchio has a very confusing one in order to not lie to Prince Charming about where Shrek is. It involves ConfusingMultipleNegatives. Unfortunately, it gets ''so'' [[GoneHorriblyRight aggravatingly confusing]] that his allies crack and tell the truth. |
| 355 | * In ''[[WesternAnimation/MagicAdventuresOfMumfie Mumfie's Quest]]'', when the Secretary of Night asks for Mumfie's name, his answer is "Yes!". The Secretary asks what he means, and he says that he has a name, and gives the correct response. |
| 356 | * During the scene in ''WesternAnimation/MeetTheRobinsons'' where Bud and Lewis try to make their way back to the garage, they stumble upon a dog wearing spectacles. |
| 357 | -->'''Lewis:''' Why is your dog wearing glasses?\ |
| 358 | '''Bud:''' Oh, 'cause his insurance won't pay for contacts. |
| 359 | * ''WesternAnimation/ElArca'' goes with the ''Airplane!''-style gag. |
| 360 | -->'''God:''' I am going to send a deluge.\ |
| 361 | '''Noah:''' A deluge?!\ |
| 362 | '''God:''' Yes. It's a powerful rain that drowns everything.\ |
| 363 | '''Noah:''' I know what a deluge is! What I want to know is... why? |
| 364 | * ''WesternAnimation/SpiderManSpiderVerse'': |
| 365 | ** ''WesternAnimation/SpiderManIntoTheSpiderVerse'': In TheStinger, [[spoiler:ComicBook/SpiderMan2099 and [[WesternAnimation/SpiderMan1967 60's Spider-Man]] get into [[SeriousBusiness a heated argument about who pointed at the other first]]. J. Jonah Jameson and a cop witness this, and the cop also wonders who pointed first. Jameson [[SarcasmMode helpfully]] says "Spider-Man pointed first, obviously!"[[note]]Though there's no reason for Jameson or the cop to believe 2099 Spider-Man is actually Spider-Man.[[/note]]]]. |
| 366 | ** ''WesternAnimation/SpiderManAcrossTheSpiderVerse'': When Miles asks Webslinger why his horse needs a mask, Webslinger answers "To conceal his identity." This is true, but the question of why Webslinger's horse would need to conceal his identity is left unanswered. |
| 367 | [[/folder]] |
| 368 | |
| 369 | [[folder:Films — Live-Action]] |
| 370 | %%* ''Film/TheATeam'': |
| 371 | %%-->'''Sosa:''' Gilbert, you've either deliberately aided and abetted a federal fugitive's escape, or you're the single dumbest human being I've ever come into contact with. Would you like to know which way I'm leaning?\ |
| 372 | %%'''Gilbert:''' Forward! |
| 373 | * ''Film/{{Airplane}}'' does this a lot, mostly with "what is it?" questions. |
| 374 | ** "There's been a little problem in the cockpit." "The cockpit? What is it?" "It's a room at the front of the plane where the pilot sits. But that's not important right now." |
| 375 | ** "This woman has to be gotten to a hospital." "The hospital? What is it?" "It's a big building with patients. But that's not important right now." |
| 376 | ** "You got a letter from headquarters this morning." "What is it?" "It's a big building where generals meet. But that's not important right now." |
| 377 | ** Asked for his name and position, Ted answers, "Ted Stryker. I'm sitting down, facing forward, but that's not important right now." |
| 378 | * ''Film/TheAmericanPresident'': |
| 379 | ** President Shepherd, concerned his daughter Lucy isn't doing as well in social studies as she should, gives her an old textbook of his: |
| 380 | --->'''President Shepherd:''' Luce, take a look at this book. This is exciting stuff. It's about who we are and what we want. Read what it says on the first page.\ |
| 381 | '''Lucy Shepherd:''' "Property of Gilmore Junior High School."\ |
| 382 | '''President Shepherd:''' The ''next'' page, Luce. |
| 383 | ** A variation later in the movie, when Shepherd meets lobbyist Sydney Ellen Wade for the first time, and they're in his office: |
| 384 | --->'''Sydney Ellen Wade:''' If you don't live up to the deal you just made, come New Hampshire, we're gonna go shopping for a new candidate. ''(walks toward the door)''\ |
| 385 | '''President Shepherd:''' You can't do that, Sydney.\ |
| 386 | '''Sydney:''' With all due respect, Mr. President, who's gonna stop me?\ |
| 387 | '''President Shepherd:''' Well, if you go through that door, the United States Secret Service. That's my private office. You need to go out that way. |
| 388 | * From ''Film/Annie2014'': |
| 389 | -->'''Will Stacks:''' ''(after saving Annie from getting hit by a car)'' Why do you run like that?\ |
| 390 | '''Annie''': Gets me places faster. |
| 391 | * ''Film/ApocalypseNow'': |
| 392 | -->'''Willard''': Do you know who's in command here?\ |
| 393 | '''Roach''': Yeah. ''[Walks off]'' |
| 394 | * ''Film/AustinPowers: International Man of Mystery'', when Vanessa finds out just how Austin got plans from one of Dr. Evil's {{Femme Fatale}}s. |
| 395 | -->'''Vanessa:''' Did you use protection?\ |
| 396 | '''Austin:''' Of course, I have a 9 millimeter automatic. |
| 397 | * ''Film/{{The Avengers|2012}}'' gives us this gem: [[ComicBook/IronMan Tony]] forgets to factor in [[ComicBook/CaptainAmerica Steve's]] FishOutOfTemporalWater issues while trying to fix the Helicarrier's busted engine, resulting in some sarcasm from Cap: |
| 398 | -->'''Tony:''' ''(from inside rotor)'' Okay, tell me what you see!\ |
| 399 | '''Steve:''' ''(staring at a bewilderingly high-tech panel)'' It seems to run on some form of electricity.\ |
| 400 | '''Tony:''' Well, you're not wrong... |
| 401 | * In ''Film/TheBabe'', a biopic about Creator/BabeRuth, the title ballplayer arranges for an adoption because he and his first wife, Helen, have had no luck conceiving a child. He arrives at their home with a nanny holding an infant, and a dazed Helen inquires, "What is it?" She means to ask whether the child is a boy or a girl, but Babe replies incredulously, "A baby." |
| 402 | * In ''Film/BroadwayMelodyOf1936'', a theatrical producer, auditioning chorus girls, asks one how tall she is. She lifts a hand to the top of her head and says, "About up to here." |
| 403 | * One of God's conditions in ''Film/BruceAlmighty'' is "You can't mess with free will." |
| 404 | -->'''Bruce''': Uh-huh. ''({{beat}})'' Can I ask why?\ |
| 405 | '''God''': ''(gleefully)'' Yes, you can! That's the beauty of it! |
| 406 | * In ''Film/{{Caddyshack}}'', Ty Webb gives a good one to Judge Smails after explaining that he doesn't play golf competitively: |
| 407 | -->'''Smails:''' Well, how do you measure yourself against the other golfers?\ |
| 408 | '''Ty:''' By height. |
| 409 | * Done twice in a row in ''Film/TheCatInTheHat''. |
| 410 | -->'''Sally:''' Where did you come from?\ |
| 411 | '''The Cat:''' Hmm, how do I put this... when a mommy cat and a daddy cat love each other very much, they decide that-\ |
| 412 | '''Conrad:''' Oh no, no, no, no, no. Where did you ''come'' from?\ |
| 413 | '''The Cat:''' My place, where do you think? *laughs* |
| 414 | * ''Film/CitizenKane'': |
| 415 | --> '''Reporter:''' Mr. Kane, How did you find business conditions in Europe?\ |
| 416 | '''Kane:''' With great difficulty! |
| 417 | * From ''Film/{{Clonus}}'': |
| 418 | -->'''George:''' I qualified, I'm [[ReleasedToElsewhere going to America]]!\ |
| 419 | '''Richard:''' That's great! When are you going?\ |
| 420 | '''George:''' Later on. |
| 421 | ** Justified in that George is genetically conditioned to be not too bright. |
| 422 | * ''Film/{{The Count of Monte Cristo|2002}}'': A rather dark variation. |
| 423 | -->'''Mondego:''' How...?\ |
| 424 | '''Cristo:''' How did I escape? With difficulty. How did I plan this moment? With pleasure. |
| 425 | * This exchange in ''Film/DeathProof'' when Pam finds out Stuntman Mike's name: |
| 426 | -->'''Pam:''' Stuntman Mike's your name?\ |
| 427 | '''Stuntman Mike:''' You ask anybody.\ |
| 428 | '''Pam:''' Hey, Warren, who is this guy?\ |
| 429 | '''Warren:''' Stuntman Mike.\ |
| 430 | '''Pam:''' And who the hell is Stuntman Mike?\ |
| 431 | '''Warren:''' [[ShapedLikeItself He's a stuntman.]] |
| 432 | ** Another example later on in the movie: |
| 433 | --->'''Abernathy:''' Well, you see, we're making a Hollywood movie in town, and it's a cheerleader movie, and she's one of the cheerleaders.\ |
| 434 | '''Car Salesman:''' What's a cheerleader movie?\ |
| 435 | '''Abernathy:''' A movie about cheerleaders. |
| 436 | * ''Film/DumbAndDumber'' has Lloyd ask the waitress "What is the 'Soup Du jour'?" And she answers "The soup of the day." |
| 437 | * In ''Film/{{Entrapment}}'', some of the exchanges between Gin and Mac. |
| 438 | --> '''Mac:''' (''looking at watch'') Three, two, one, your time's up. You said you'd tell me what the next job is in twenty-four hours.\ |
| 439 | '''Gin:''' It's a bank.\ |
| 440 | '''Mac:''' And?\ |
| 441 | '''Gin:''' And? I didn't say I'd tell you any more. |
| 442 | * In ''Film/{{Eraser}}'', after John Kruger falls out of a plane and lands in a junkyard, a kid who watched him fall comes up to him. |
| 443 | -->'''Kruger:''' Where am I?\ |
| 444 | '''Kid:''' Earth. Welcome. |
| 445 | * ''Film/FromDuskTillDawn'': |
| 446 | -->'''Kate:''' Where are we going?\ |
| 447 | '''Richie:''' Mexico.\ |
| 448 | '''Kate:''' What's in Mexico?\ |
| 449 | '''Richie:''' Mexicans. |
| 450 | * ''Film/ETTheExtraTerrestrial'': When Elliot and Michael are about take the car with E.T. in it. |
| 451 | -->'''Government Agent:''' (''knocks on window'') Who are you?\ |
| 452 | '''Michael:''' I'm driving. |
| 453 | * ''Invoked'' in ''Film/TheFront''. Howard Prince is eventually brought before [[RedScare HUAC]]. Not wanting to name names, he instead gives responses that allow him to appear cooperative without actually answering. [[spoiler:Unfortunately, they threaten to indict him on his history as a bookie, forcing him into making his brave stand at the climax.]] |
| 454 | * During a war crime scene in ''Film/FullMetalJacket'': |
| 455 | -->'''Joker''': How can you [[WouldNotShootACivilian shoot women and children]]?\ |
| 456 | '''Door Gunner''': Easy. You just don't {{lead|TheTarget}} 'em so much. (Laughing) Ain't war hell? |
| 457 | * ''Film/{{Ghostbusters 1984}}:'' "Where do these stairs go?"... "They go up." |
| 458 | * ''Film/{{Godmothered}}'': When Mackenzie asks "Who eats that much seafood?" Eleanor says "Sharks!" (The question was rhetorical.) |
| 459 | * In ''Film/GoWest1940'', when Joseph asks Quale where the train is, Quale tells him "the tracks." |
| 460 | * While having dinner at Film/TheGrandBudapestHotel, Mr. Moustafa lists what the requirements were for being Monsieur Gustave's "personal guest." They had to be: rich, old, insecure, vain, superficial, blonde, needy. |
| 461 | -->'''Young Author:''' Why blonde?\ |
| 462 | '''Mr. Moustafa:''' Because they all were. |
| 463 | * When asked why he committed the eponymous crime in ''Film/TheGreatTrainRobbery1978'', Creator/SeanConnery's character says "I wanted the money." |
| 464 | * ''Film/GrossePointeBlank'': "I'm doin' a double shift, what's it look like?" |
| 465 | * ''Film/AHardDaysNight'': When Music/TheBeatles are being interviewed, many of their answers are like this: |
| 466 | -->'''Reporter 1:''' Tell me, um, how did you find America?\ |
| 467 | '''Music/JohnLennon:''' Turned left at Greenland. |
| 468 | |
| 469 | -->'''Reporter 2:''' Has success changed your life?\ |
| 470 | '''Music/GeorgeHarrison:''' Yes. |
| 471 | |
| 472 | -->'''Reporter 3:''' Do you think these haircuts have come to stay?\ |
| 473 | '''Music/RingoStarr:''' Well this one has, y'know, stuck on good and proper now. |
| 474 | |
| 475 | -->'''Reporter 4:''' What do you call that hairstyle you're wearing?\ |
| 476 | '''George:''' Arthur. |
| 477 | |
| 478 | -->'''Reporter 3:''' What do you call that collar?\ |
| 479 | '''Ringo:''' Mmm... A collar. |
| 480 | * ''Film/TheHighwaymen'': After Hamer buys more than half a dozen guns and ammunition to spare, the gun store owner asks him what he needs all the firepower he just purchased for, if he "don't mind him asking". Hamer just retorts "No, I don't mind you asking at all". |
| 481 | * ''Film/HotFuzz'' has an example of an underaged drinker being far too clever for his own good. |
| 482 | --> '''Nick Angel:''' When's your birthday?\ |
| 483 | '''Kid:''' 22nd of February.\ |
| 484 | '''Angel:''' What year?\ |
| 485 | '''Kid:''' Every year.\ |
| 486 | '''Angel:''' [[GetOut Get out.]] |
| 487 | * ''Film/TheHungerGames'': |
| 488 | -->'''Caesar Flickerman''': So, Peeta, how are you finding the Capitol? And don't say "with a map". |
| 489 | * ''Film/IShotAndyWarhol'': Creator/Warhol does this repeatedly to a journalist asking why he stopped painting and started making films. Every answer is yes/no even though the questions implicitly aren't. |
| 490 | * In ''Film/IronMan2'', when Tony tries to ask Natalie where she's from: |
| 491 | --> '''Tony:''' I gotta say it. It's hard to get a read on you. Where are you from?\ |
| 492 | '''Natalie:''' Legal. |
| 493 | * In ''Film/ItsAWonderfulLife'', George asks the pregnant Mary, "Is it a boy or a girl?" Mary just nods enthusiastically. |
| 494 | * ''Film/JawsTheRevenge'' invokes this trope as a HandWave: |
| 495 | -->'''Michael:''' How did you get away from the shark?\ |
| 496 | '''Hoagie:''' It wasn't easy! |
| 497 | * ''Film/JurassicPark'': |
| 498 | -->'''Hammond:''' Our attractions will drive kids out of their minds.\ |
| 499 | '''Grant:''' And what are those?\ |
| 500 | '''Sattler:''' Small versions of adults, honey. |
| 501 | * ''Film/LoadedWeapon1'' takes this trope up to eleven. |
| 502 | -->'''Sgt. Luger:''' Do you know a woman by the name of Billie York?\ |
| 503 | '''Clerk:''' You got a picture? ''(Luger then pulls out a shirt with York's photo on it)''\ |
| 504 | '''Clerk:''' Is that her?\ |
| 505 | '''Sgt. Luger:''' No, that's her picture. |
| 506 | ** Later in the film: |
| 507 | --->'''Sgt. Jack Colt:''' So what are you doing here?\ |
| 508 | '''Miss Destiny Demeanor:''' Waiting for you.\ |
| 509 | '''Sgt. Jack Colt:''' I mean, what brought you here?\ |
| 510 | '''Miss Destiny Demeanor:''' A taxi.\ |
| 511 | '''Sgt. Jack Colt:''' Yeah, but why?\ |
| 512 | '''Miss Destiny Demeanor:''' My car's in the shop.\ |
| 513 | '''Sgt. Jack Colt:''' I mean... [Holds up a sign board] Why the hell did you come here?\ |
| 514 | '''Miss Destiny Demeanor:''' The police station would have made me nervous. |
| 515 | * A particularly JustForFun/{{egregious}} example from ''Film/LuckyNumberSlevin'': |
| 516 | -->'''Slevin:''' I'm gonna say the same thing any man with two penises says when his tailor asks him if he dresses to the right or left.\ |
| 517 | '''Lindsey:''' What's that?\ |
| 518 | ''[cuts to The Boss's penthouse]''\ |
| 519 | '''Slevin:''' Yes. |
| 520 | * Creator/MarxBrothers: |
| 521 | ** ''Film/DuckSoup'': |
| 522 | --->'''Prosecutor:''' Chicolini, when were you born?\ |
| 523 | '''Chico:''' I don't remember. I was only a little baby. |
| 524 | ** ''Film/HorseFeathers'': |
| 525 | --->'''Wagstaff:''' "In case I never see you again, which would add ten years to my life, what would you fellas want to play football?"\ |
| 526 | '''Baravelli:''' "Well at first we'd want a football"\ |
| 527 | '''Wagstaff:''' "Well I don't know if we've got a football, but if I could find one would you be interested? I don't want a hasty answer, just sleep on it."\ |
| 528 | '''Baravelli:''' "I don't think I can sleep on a football." |
| 529 | * Later in the movie, when Wagstaff is teaching a class, Harpo puts a picture of a beautiful woman over the blackboard while Wagstaff's back is turned: |
| 530 | --->'''Wagstaff:''' "Baravelli, who's responsible for this? Is this your picture?"\ |
| 531 | '''Baravelli:''' I don't think so. It doesn't look like me." |
| 532 | ** ''Film/ANightAtTheOpera'': |
| 533 | ---> '''Henderson:''' Say, what's that bed doing there?\ |
| 534 | '''Driftwood:''' I don't see it doing anything. |
| 535 | * In the original ''Film/MiracleOnThirtyFourthStreet'', Doris Walker takes a look at the employee card Kris Kringle had filled out when he was hired as Macy's Santa Claus. In response to "Age", he wrote, "Just as old as my tongue and a little older than my teeth". |
| 536 | * In the second ''Film/TheNakedGun'' film: |
| 537 | -->'''Frank:''' I told Jane to meet us at the hotel's rear entrance.\ |
| 538 | '''Ed:''' Where's that?\ |
| 539 | '''Frank:''' In the back. |
| 540 | * At the beginning of ''Film/OceansEleven'', Danny Ocean is at his hearing to determine if he is fit to be released from prison. |
| 541 | -->'''Male Examiner:''' You have a history of arrests, but you have never been successfully charged. Is there a particular reason you chose to commit this crime, or a reason you simply got ''caught'' this time?\ |
| 542 | '''Danny:''' My wife left me. I fell into a self-destructive pattern.\ |
| 543 | ''({{beat}})''\ |
| 544 | '''Female Examiner:''' If released, do you think you would fall into a similar pattern?\ |
| 545 | '''Danny:''' She already left me once. I don't think she'd do it again just for kicks. |
| 546 | * ''Film/RedRockWest'': When Lyle asks how Wayne, [[spoiler:a wanted fugitive, got elected sheriff]], Wayne replies "[[spoiler:I was elected.]]" |
| 547 | * ''Film/RioBravo'': When Dude says Stumpy likes roses, Feathers asks Chance who Stumpy is. Chance wryly replies, "The fellow that likes roses," before giving a more accurate explanation. |
| 548 | * The ''[[Film/TheLittleRascals Our Gang]]'' short "School's Out" features several test answers taken from H.M. Walker's Vaudeville routine, many of which take this form. |
| 549 | ** "Donald Haines, where is Washington?" "First in war, first in peace, and third in the American League." |
| 550 | ** "Douglas Greer, what was Abraham Lincoln's mother's name?" "Mrs. Lincoln." |
| 551 | ** "Buddy O'Donald, on Paul Revere's night ride, what did he say as he stopped his horse in front of colonial homes?" "He said, 'Whoa!'" |
| 552 | ** "Bobby Malon, what was Nero doing while Rome burned?" "I don't know, but I think he should've been hauling water to the fire." |
| 553 | ** "Jackie Cooper, who was ''Literature/TheHunchbackOfNotreDame''?" "[[Film/TheHunchbackOfNotreDame1923 Lon Chaney]]." |
| 554 | * ''Franchise/ThePinkPanther'': |
| 555 | ** In the [[Film/ThePinkPanther2006 2006 movie]] starring Creator/SteveMartin, a reporter asks Inspector Clouseau if they (the police) know if the killer is a man or a woman. Clouseau's answer is: "Well, of course I know that! What else is there, a kitten?" |
| 556 | *** Also, when he quotes someone about politics, Yvette asks him if he said it, meaning if he is the original author of the quote. Clouseau takes the question literally and, after bemusedly looking around for someone else, answers "Yes." |
| 557 | ** In ''Film/TheReturnOfThePinkPanther'', Clouseau visits a town where he encounters this trope, twice. First he enters a taxi and says to the driver "Follow that car!" The cabbie promptly starts chasing the car... on foot! A minute or two later, Clouseau asks a passer-by for directions. |
| 558 | --->'''Clouseau''': Do you know the way to the Palace Hotel?\ |
| 559 | '''Passer-by''': Yes. (Continues on without giving an answer.) |
| 560 | ** In ''Film/ThePinkPantherStrikesAgain,'' Clouseau enters an inn, sees a dog, and asks the innkeeper if his dog bites. The answer he gets is technically correct... |
| 561 | --->'''Clouseau''': I thought you said he does not bite!\ |
| 562 | '''Innkeeper''': That is not my dog. |
| 563 | * ''Film/RamboIII'': |
| 564 | -->'''Hamid:''' What's that?\ |
| 565 | '''Rambo:''' It's a blue light.\ |
| 566 | '''Hamid:''' What does it do?\ |
| 567 | '''Rambo:''' It turns blue. |
| 568 | * In ''Film/SexyBeast'', the powerful {{gayngster}} Teddy Bass attends an orgy and notices another man, Harry, giving him a certain look. |
| 569 | -->'''Teddy:''' Men or women?\ |
| 570 | '''Harry:''' Oh... definitely. |
| 571 | * ''Film/{{Sisu}}'': |
| 572 | -->''' Helldorf''': "How many mines did you lay?"\ |
| 573 | '''Nazi sapper''': "All of them." |
| 574 | * ''Film/SleepyHollow1999'': |
| 575 | -->'''Ichabod Crane:''' Katrina, why are you in my room?\ |
| 576 | '''Katrina Van Tassel:''' Because it is yours. |
| 577 | * ''Film/{{Snatch}}'' had this memorable exchange: |
| 578 | -->'''Customs Agent:''' Anything to declare?\ |
| 579 | '''Avi:''' Yeah. Don't go to England. |
| 580 | * In ''Film/SonsOfTheDesert'', [[Creator/LaurelAndHardy Stan and Ollie]] wouldn't get back home until they came up with a cover story for an escapade. When interrogated by cops about their places of residence, Ollie claimed to live at home and Stan said he was Ollie's next door neighbor. Stan, being Stan, told a really useful answer later. |
| 581 | * ''Franchise/StarTrek'': |
| 582 | ** ''Film/StarTrekTheMotionPicture'': The Ilia probe does a bit of this when it first appears. It serves V'Ger. Who is V'Ger? V'Ger is that which seeks "the creator". And who's the creator? Why, the one who created V'Ger. It eventually turns out V'Ger's not giving them the run-around, it just legitimately doesn't know who (or what) its creator is. |
| 583 | ** ''Film/StarTrekIITheWrathOfKhan'': Although in this case Kirk quickly makes it obvious that he's just joking around. |
| 584 | ---> '''Saavik:''' May I ask how you dealt with the test?\ |
| 585 | '''Kirk:''' You may ask. |
| 586 | ** ''Film/StarTrekVITheUndiscoveredCountry'': When [=McCoy=] is on the witness stand during the trial, General Chang asked about his current medical status. [=McCoy=] answers, "Aside from a touch of arthritis, I'd say pretty good." [[ActuallyPrettyFunny A single Klingon laughs his ass off]] [[OnlyOneFindsItFun while the rest of the courtroom is dead silent]]. |
| 587 | * ''Franchise/StarWars'': |
| 588 | ** ''Film/TheEmpireStrikesBack'': |
| 589 | ---> '''C-3PO:''' Excuse me, sir. Might I inquire what's going on?\ |
| 590 | '''Han Solo:''' Why not? |
| 591 | ** ''Film/ReturnOfTheJedi'': "R2! What are you doing here?... Well, I can ''see'' you're serving drinks..." |
| 592 | * When Barbara the LittleStowaway is caught hiding in a cabin in ''Film/Stowaway1936'', the crewmember asks "What are you doing here?" and Barbara answers with "Hiding." |
| 593 | * ''Film/LaStrada'': |
| 594 | --> '''Gelsomina''': Where are you from?\ |
| 595 | '''Zampanò''': My home town.\ |
| 596 | '''Gelsomina''': You don't talk like us. Where were you born?\ |
| 597 | '''Zampanò''': My father's house. |
| 598 | * ''Film/ToBeOrNotToBe:'' When a suspicious Erhardt asks how long it has been since Siletski (really a disguised Bronski) saw his friend Hitler, Bronski evasively replies, "much too long." |
| 599 | * Film/TheThreeStooges were quite fond of this: |
| 600 | ** From "Shivering Sherlocks": |
| 601 | --->'''Police Captain:''' Have you any visible means of support?\ |
| 602 | '''Larry:''' Sure. I've got suspenders! |
| 603 | ** From "Don't Throw That Knife", practicing taking census: |
| 604 | --->'''Moe:''' Where were you born, madam?\ |
| 605 | '''Shemp:''' In the hospital.\ |
| 606 | '''Moe:''' Hospital?\ |
| 607 | '''Shemp:''' Yes, I wanted to be near my mother! |
| 608 | ** From "Hold That Lion", when Shemp gets his head stuck in a fishbowl: |
| 609 | --->'''Shemp:''' (tries to speak, but his voice is muffled, resulting in incomprehensible gibberish)\ |
| 610 | '''Moe:''' (to Larry) What'd he say?\ |
| 611 | '''Larry:''' (speaks incomprehensible gibberish to Moe) |
| 612 | * ''Film/UndercoverBlues'', when Jeff Blue and his super-spy wife, Kathleen Turner, are deliberately being obfuscating to the local police: |
| 613 | -->'''Lt. Sawyer''': Oh, cute baby! Boy or girl?\ |
| 614 | '''Jeff Blue''': Gosh, I hope so! |
| 615 | * ''Film/{{Wild}}'': Given by a smart-ass snowboarder when hiker Cheryl Strayed, who is struggling through the snow-covered Sierras, is trying to figure out if she is still on the Pacific Coast Trail. |
| 616 | --> '''Cheryl''': Where am I?\ |
| 617 | '''Snowboarder''': California. |
| 618 | [[/folder]] |
| 619 | |
| 620 | [[folder:Jokes]] |
| 621 | * Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. (Technically true, but what did it want on the other side of the road?) |
| 622 | * Three logicians walk into a bar. The bartender asks them, "Do you all want drinks?" The first says "I don't know," the second says "I don't know," the third says "Yes, please." |
| 623 | * There's a joke (with many subvariants) about a person who gets lost in a hot air balloon, asks someone on the ground where they are, and the person replies that they're in a balloon (perhaps with altitude and additional unhelpful details). The ballooner guesses that the person is a mathematician (or engineer, tech support worker, etc) because they've given an answer that's completely accurate but completely useless. There's often a second punchline that the ballooner must be in management, because he's in a fix of his own making, but is somehow making it someone else's fault. |
| 624 | * The pilot of a light aircraft is lost in fog. He sees a skyscraper looming at 2 o'clock. He leans out the window and yells to someone in the offices, "Where am I?" "In an aeroplane!" comes the reply. The pilot then sets course for a perfect landing at a nearby airport. Later, the pilot and guy from the office run into each other in a bar. The pilot thanks the guy for letting him know exactly where he was, and tells him he pulled off a perfect landing because of it. "How?" asks the guy from the office. "Well," says the pilot, "the answer you gave was completely accurate yet totally useless, so I knew you must work for Microsoft Tech Support, and I know where that office is in relation to the airport." |
| 625 | * Speaking of pilots: |
| 626 | --> What do you call a (pick one)woman / black guy / gay man / trans person / etc flying a plane?\ |
| 627 | A ''pilot'', you asshole! Jesus! |
| 628 | * There's a joke that goes like this: |
| 629 | -->'''Person A''': What does your dad do for a living?\ |
| 630 | '''Person B''': My dad's dead.\ |
| 631 | '''Person A''': Well, [[AmbiguousSyntax what did he do before he died]]?\ |
| 632 | '''Person B''': He sorta clutched at his chest and fell over. |
| 633 | * There's an old joke about asking for directions that goes along these lines: |
| 634 | -->'''Driver''': Excuse me sir, but does this road go to London? (Or the name of any place.)\ |
| 635 | '''Pedestrian''': This road, sir? No, sir. Tends to stay right where it is.\ |
| 636 | '''or:''' No, they keep it here and drive cars on it. |
| 637 | * Related joke |
| 638 | -->'''Tourist''': Excuse me, sir. If I go down the street and take a left, will the train station be there?\ |
| 639 | '''Local''': You know, the train station will be there even if you don't take a left. |
| 640 | * There's another old joke, where a tourist lost in New York asks a street musician for directions: |
| 641 | -->'''Tourist''': Excuse me, sir. How do I get to Carnegie Hall?\ |
| 642 | '''Musician''': Practice, man! Practice! |
| 643 | * A harsher version. |
| 644 | -->'''Person A:''' Excuse me! What's the quickest way for me to get to the hospital?\ |
| 645 | '''Person B:''' Cross the road with your eyes closed. |
| 646 | * And another |
| 647 | -->'''Person A''': Have you lived here all your life?\ |
| 648 | '''Person B''': Not yet. |
| 649 | * Yet another |
| 650 | -->'''Fat lady math teacher''': Jimmy, pay attention! How much consumption until I reach Buffalo?\ |
| 651 | '''Jimmy''': Let's say twenty pounds of feed. |
| 652 | * One more |
| 653 | -->'''Passenger:''' Does this bus go to Duluth?\ |
| 654 | '''Bus driver:''' No, this bus goes beep beep. |
| 655 | * And a more painful one: |
| 656 | -->'''Hitchhiker''': Is the city far?\ |
| 657 | '''Driver''': No.\ |
| 658 | '''Hitchhiker''': May I get in your car?\ |
| 659 | '''Driver''': Yes.\ |
| 660 | Many hours pass by as they drive in silence.\ |
| 661 | '''Hitchhiker''': Is the city far?\ |
| 662 | '''Driver''': Yes, now it is. |
| 663 | * A variation on the above: |
| 664 | -->'''Hitchhiker''': How long would it take to get to Miami?\ |
| 665 | '''Driver''': About two hours.\ |
| 666 | '''Hitchhiker''': Can you give me a lift?\ |
| 667 | '''Driver''': Sure, hop in.\ |
| 668 | Four hours pass and they are still on the road.\ |
| 669 | '''Hitchhiker''': Didn't you say it took two hours to get to Miami?\ |
| 670 | '''Driver''': Yes.\ |
| 671 | '''Hitchhiker''': Well, then why's it taking twice that time?\ |
| 672 | '''Driver''': Because I'm not going to Miami. |
| 673 | * A man goes into an Irish bar and asks "What's the fastest way to Dublin?" "Are you walking or driving?" the bartender asks. "Driving," the man replies. The bartender nods. "That's the fastest way." |
| 674 | * [[RuleOfThree An engineer, a physicist, and a mathematician]] are on a train in Scotland. They see a black sheep, and the following exchange ensues: |
| 675 | -->'''Engineer''': Look, sheep in Scotland are black.\ |
| 676 | '''Physicist''': Well, all we know for sure is that some sheep in Scotland are black.\ |
| 677 | '''Mathematician''': All we can be sure of is that, in Scotland, there is at least one sheep that is black on at least one side. |
| 678 | ** A version of this joke involving cows instead of sheep appears in ''Literature/TheCuriousIncidentOfTheDogInTheNightTime''. |
| 679 | * Or this joke (when sitting at the table): "Can I have the butter?" "Yes." "Can you pass it to me?" "Yes. ''(beat)'' What, now?" |
| 680 | * Not as popular a joke now with personal cellphones, but it used to be a joke when calling a house line to respond to "Is [person] home?" by simply saying "Yes." |
| 681 | * Some teachers are fond of using this when kids ask to go to the bathroom, especially when they say "can" (asking if they're physically capable) instead of "may" (asking for permission): |
| 682 | -->'''Student''': Mr. Smith, can I go to the bathroom?\ |
| 683 | '''Teacher''': I don't know, can ya? Sit down. |
| 684 | * Russian variation of the balloon joke: Franchise/SherlockHolmes and Dr. Watson, being drifted away in a hot air balloon, finally spot a cowherd below and ask him where they are. |
| 685 | --> You are in a hot air balloon.\ |
| 686 | Watson, we're in Russia.\ |
| 687 | But Holmes, how can you know that?\ |
| 688 | See, that man below is a mathematician. His answer is both correct and totally useless.\ |
| 689 | I see, but what has Russia to do with that?\ |
| 690 | Because only in Russia do they use mathematicians to herd cows! |
| 691 | * In another Holmes and Watson joke, they go camping. At three in the morning, Holmes wakes Watson. |
| 692 | --> Watson, look up. What can you deduce from what you see?\ |
| 693 | From the starry sky? Astronomically, there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, Saturn is in Leo. Theologically, God is great and we are small and insignificant. Horologically, it's about 3 AM. Meteorologically, we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. What do you deduce, Holmes?\ |
| 694 | I deduce that you're an idiot, Watson. If we can see the stars, then our tent has been stolen! |
| 695 | * "When I got home from work last night, my wife demanded that I take her someplace expensive so I took her to a gas station." |
| 696 | * Someone waved at me in the street the other day. Then they said "I'm sorry I thought you were somebody else." I said, "I am." |
| 697 | * Then there's the one about a man in a motorboat, clearly lost, who comes alongside another man in a motorboat and yells "Which way is land?" The second man bends over his compass and map for a moment, calculating furiously, then calls to the first man "West by north by half a north!" The first man screams back "Don't get technical with me! Just ''point!''" |
| 698 | * Another old joke: |
| 699 | --> '''Customer:''' Waiter, what is this fly doing in my soup?\ |
| 700 | '''Waiter:''' I believe that's the backstroke, sir. |
| 701 | * There's a joke with more of a logician's bent: an omniscient being comes to Earth and tells the world that it will answer one question completely truthfully before disappearing forever. The world's philosophers, logicians and thinkers get together and discuss for a while, and announce that they've come up with the perfect question. They go before the omniscient being and ask it this question: "What is the ordered pair of the best possible question we can ask you, and its answer?" It responds, "That, and this." then disappears in a PuffOfLogic. |
| 702 | * Another joke: |
| 703 | -->'''Q''' Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?\ |
| 704 | '''A''' At the bottom. |
| 705 | * And another: |
| 706 | -->'''Q''' Which battle did UsefulNotes/RichardIII die in?\ |
| 707 | '''A''' His last one. |
| 708 | * Yet another joke: |
| 709 | -->'''Q''' What ended in 1896?\ |
| 710 | '''A''' 1895 |
| 711 | * Yet another joke: |
| 712 | -->'''Q''': Do you know what time it is?\ |
| 713 | '''A''': Yes.\ |
| 714 | '''Q''': Well, could you tell me what time it is?\ |
| 715 | '''A''': Yes.\ |
| 716 | '''Q''': ''Will'' you tell me what time it is?\ |
| 717 | '''A''': Nope. |
| 718 | * A variation: |
| 719 | -->'''Person A''': Do you know what time it is?\ |
| 720 | '''Person B''': Yes.\ |
| 721 | '''Person A''': Thank you. ''(walks away)'' |
| 722 | * A woman asks her husband, a computer programmer, to go to the grocery store. She tells him to buy a gallon of milk, and if they have eggs, to buy a dozen. He returns home with twelve gallons of milk and says, "They had eggs." |
| 723 | ** She tries again the next week saying "Get a gallon of milk, and while you're there, get eggs." He never comes back. |
| 724 | * A programmer is going to sleep, but first puts two glasses on the nightstand. One is filled with water, in case he wants a drink in the middle of the night. The other is empty, in case he doesn't. |
| 725 | * Another one: |
| 726 | -->'''Q''': Hey, what's up?\ |
| 727 | '''A''': Birds, clouds, aircrafts, the sky...\ |
| 728 | '''A''': It's a preposition.\ |
| 729 | '''A''': The direction away from the center of gravity of a celestial object.\ |
| 730 | '''A''': [[WesternAnimation/{{Up}} A movie about a flying house]]. |
| 731 | * What is the definition of a bore? A man whom you ask "how you doing", and he starts answering. |
| 732 | * Still more jokes: |
| 733 | -->'''Waiter:''' How did you find the steak?\ |
| 734 | '''Diner:''' I pushed aside the potato and there it was. |
| 735 | * There is an old joke in the mathematics community that says that a logician is a guy who, when asked about his newborn child "is it a boy or a girl?" answers "yes". |
| 736 | * An expectant father is waiting in the hall outside a maternity ward, when a nurse appears and tells him his wife has finished giving birth, and he can see them now. The man says, “My wife and I have seven daughters and no sons, so I hope this one’s a boy so we can finally stop having all these kids.” The nurse says, “Your wife did not give birth to a daughter.” The man is relieved, and the nurse takes him inside, [[spoiler:where he meets his newborn triplet daughters]]. |
| 737 | * There is a joke about a guy who sits at a bar, and notices a girl nearby, wearing some very tight pants with no zipper nor buttons: |
| 738 | -->'''Guy:''' Pardon me for the question, but... how does one get into those pants?\ |
| 739 | '''Girl:''' Well, you can start by buying me a beer. |
| 740 | * A TinyGuyHugeGirl joke: |
| 741 | -->'''Tiny Guy:''' What would you say to a little fuck?\ |
| 742 | '''Huge Girl:''' I'd say: "Hello, little fuck." |
| 743 | * Another joke has someone mention getting a gift for a spouse, and receiving the response "[[AwfulWeddedLife Good trade.]]" |
| 744 | * A similar one involving auto parts: |
| 745 | --> '''Customer:''' "Can I get a hubcap for a ''<[[TheAllegedCar notoriously bad car]]>''?" \ |
| 746 | '''Shop clerk:''' ''-{{beat}}-'' "Yeah, that sounds like a fair trade." |
| 747 | * A joke set in a mathematics class: |
| 748 | -->'''Teacher:''' What would you get if you [insert complex equation here]?\ |
| 749 | '''Student:''' The wrong answer. |
| 750 | * One of the classics: |
| 751 | --> I say, I say, I say, my dog has no nose.\ |
| 752 | How does he smell?\ |
| 753 | Terrible. |
| 754 | * Creator/StevenWright once remarked that if he brought a chocolate cake to a party he would combine both white and regular chocolate mixes while making it, so if anyone asked if he wanted white or regular chocolate cake, he would simply say, "Yes." |
| 755 | * In an Inversion of the "X or Y?" format, one joke involves an old woman who has arrived on an international flight and is being questioned by Customs. The Customs officer asks her, "Do you advocate the overthrow of the government by violence or subversion?". The old woman pauses for a while, before answering "Violence, I think." |
| 756 | * "[[YourMom Your Mother]]'s so fat, that when the waiter asks her what she is going to order, she looks at the menu and says 'Okay'." |
| 757 | * While passing a doughnut shop: |
| 758 | -->What would you say to a cup of coffee and a doughnut?\ |
| 759 | Goodbye! |
| 760 | * One joke asks how long it will take an average person to earn a black belt. The mathematician's answer is that an average person will never earn a black belt, the joke being that it's beyond an average person's capabilities. |
| 761 | * When being stopped by the police while driving, their first question will often be: "Do you know why I stopped you?" Answer "because you couldn't get a proper job" at your own peril. |
| 762 | [[/folder]] |
| 763 | |
| 764 | [[folder:Let's Play]] |
| 765 | * Out of the Creator/AchievementHunter crew, Ryan is incredibly likely to use this tactic as a way of invoking ExactWords or LoopholeAbuse, though he also does it to be a DeadpanSnarker. For instance, this example after he shot Jeremy in their 5th ''Trouble in Terrorist Town'' Let's Play: |
| 766 | --> '''Jeremy''': Ryan! Why'd you shoot me?!\ |
| 767 | '''Ryan''': I was trying to kill you. |
| 768 | * In one episode of WebVideo/GameGrumps, Danny recounts another memorable moment with his Israeli, ESL father Avi: |
| 769 | --> '''Danny''': So dad, should we get pizza or sushi for dinner?\ |
| 770 | '''Avi Danny''': Yes!\ |
| 771 | '''Danny''': Okay. [[{{BreadEggsBreadedEggs}} Pizzushi]] it is. |
| 772 | [[/folder]] |
| 773 | |
| 774 | [[folder:Literature]] |
| 775 | * Creator/SpikeMilligan put plenty of these in his war memoirs, ''Literature/AdolfHitlerMyPartInHisDownfall'': |
| 776 | -->'''Waiter''': Anything to drink?\ |
| 777 | '''Spike''': Yes, anything. |
| 778 | * Creator/IainBanks loved this trope. The most extensive example is in ''Literature/AgainstADarkBackground:'' |
| 779 | -->'''Man:''' Hello?\ |
| 780 | '''Zefla''' Hello. We're looking for a gentleman called Ivexton Travapeth.\ |
| 781 | '''Man:''' Yes.\ |
| 782 | '''Zefla''' ''({{beat}})'' You're not him, then?\ |
| 783 | '''Man:''' No.\ |
| 784 | '''Zefla''' Right. Do you know where we can find him?\ |
| 785 | '''Man:''' Yes.\ |
| 786 | '''Zefla''' Could you tell us where he is?\ |
| 787 | '''Man:''' Yes.\ |
| 788 | '''Sharrow''' Wrong Department. [[LampshadeHanging It's the formal logic building and they're working to rule]].\ |
| 789 | '''Zefla''' Where is he?\ |
| 790 | '''Man:''' Oh, here.\ |
| 791 | '''Zefla''' May we see him?\ |
| 792 | '''Man:''' Oh, yes.\ |
| 793 | '''Sharrow''' ''(quietly)'' Keep going, the passports only last a year.\ |
| 794 | '''Zefla''' ''(trying not to laugh)'' Good. Thank you. We'd have phoned or screened but Mister Travapeth seems to discourage that sort of contact.\ |
| 795 | '''Man:''' Yes.\ |
| 796 | '''Zefla''' Yes. Could you let us in?\ |
| 797 | '''Man:''' Yes, yes.\ |
| 798 | '''Zefla''' Please come down and let us in.\ |
| 799 | '''Man:''' Very well.\ |
| 800 | '''Sharrow''' Wake me when the door opens or the universe ends, whichever's sooner.\ |
| 801 | '''Man''' ''(opens door)''\ |
| 802 | '''Zefla''' Good morning.\ |
| 803 | '''Man:''' [[OverlyLongGag Yes]]. |
| 804 | * This is, not surprisingly considering that the author ''was'' in fact a mathematician, one of the logical twists Creator/LewisCarroll peppered throughout ''Literature/AlicesAdventuresInWonderland'': |
| 805 | -->"Would you tell me, please, which way I ought to go from here?"\ |
| 806 | "That depends a good deal on where you want to get to," said [[CheshireCatGrin the Cat]].\ |
| 807 | "I don't much care where--" said Alice.\ |
| 808 | "Then it doesn't matter which way you go," said the Cat.\ |
| 809 | "--so long as I get ''somewhere''," Alice added as an explanation.\ |
| 810 | "Oh, you're sure to do that," said the Cat, "if you only walk long enough." |
| 811 | * In the chapter book ''Literature/AmeliaBedelia & Friends Mind Their Manners'', Amelia Bedelia's teacher Mrs. Shauk asks "Amelia Bedelia, can you come to the front of the room, please?" "Yes, I can," replies Amelia Bedelia, thinking that even though her desk in the last row, her legs work just fine. She then sits up straight in her chair, smiling. Mrs. Shauk, used to the workings of Amelia Bedelia's mind, smiles, shakes her head and sighs, then directs her "Amelia Bedelia, would you walk to the front of the room, and stand next to me?" and Amelia Bedelia does. |
| 812 | * In ''Literature/AmericanGods'', Shadow gets one from Whiskey Jack, and then promptly [[LampshadeHanging calls him on it]]. |
| 813 | -->'''Shadow:''' Where are we? Am I on the tree? [[spoiler:Am I dead?]] Am I here? I thought everything was finished. What's real?\ |
| 814 | '''Whiskey Jack:''' Yes.\ |
| 815 | '''Shadow:''' ''Yes?'' What kind of an answer is ''Yes''?\ |
| 816 | '''Whiskey Jack:''' It's a good answer. True answer, too. |
| 817 | ** Shadow gets one from Sweeney as well |
| 818 | ---> '''Sweeney:''' ''(performs an elaborate coin vanishing trick)''\ |
| 819 | '''Shadow:''' We have to talk about that. I need to know how you did it.\ |
| 820 | '''Sweeney:''' I did it with panache and style. |
| 821 | * ''Literature/{{Animorphs}}'': After being told by the resident friendly alien member of the team that they have all been dragged through a fracture in space-time continuum |
| 822 | -->'''Jake''': Did we go forward or back? Are we in the past or the future?\ |
| 823 | '''Ax''': Yes. It's definitely one of those two choices. |
| 824 | * In Creator/IsaacAsimov's ''Literature/BlackWidowers'' story "Truth to Tell" the monthly guest, a man who never tells a lie, is suspected of a crime which it seems only he could have committed, but he continually denies it, saying: "I didn't take the cash or the bonds." However the waiter, Henry, asks him: [[spoiler:"Did you take the cash ''and'' the bonds?" The guest declines to answer and leaves.]] |
| 825 | ** This is using the word ''or'' differently than usual, but inversely compared to how this trope is normally played out. In normal speech, ''or'' is used as an ''exclusive or'', unless in a negative sentence, such as here, which is normally an ''inclusive or''. He's using it as an ''exclusive or'', and as that excludes the possibility of taking both, he's technically telling the truth. |
| 826 | * ''Literature/CatchTwentyTwo'' has Yossarian being interrogated in hospital. He is slightly delirious at the time, though. |
| 827 | -->"Where were you born?"\ |
| 828 | "In a hospital."\ |
| 829 | "In what state were you born?"\ |
| 830 | "A state of innocence." |
| 831 | * From ''Literature/TheCatcherInTheRye'': |
| 832 | -->"What are you reading?"\ |
| 833 | "Goddamn book." |
| 834 | * From ''[[Literature/PaladinOfShadows Choosers of the Slain]]'': |
| 835 | -->"Be careful what she teaches her," Adams said, without looking up. "You might get a very nasty surprise."\ |
| 836 | "Are you talking about Anastasia teaching Katya or the other way around?" Nielson asked, grinning.\ |
| 837 | "Yes." |
| 838 | * Literature/{{Discworld}}: |
| 839 | ** From the novel ''Literature/{{Hogfather}}'': |
| 840 | --->'''Susan:''' Are those mountains real or some sort of shadows?\ |
| 841 | '''Death:''' '''YES.''' |
| 842 | ** Similarly, when the Senior Wrangler suggests that the mistletoe, while being genuinely symbolic, is only symbolic of mistletoe: |
| 843 | --->'''Archchancellor:''' That statement is either so deep it would take a lifetime to fully comprehend every particle of its meaning, or it is a load of absolute tosh. Which is it, I wonder?\ |
| 844 | '''Senior Wrangler:''' (''desperately'') It could be both.\ |
| 845 | '''Archchancellor:''' And that comment is either very perceptive, or very trite.\ |
| 846 | '''Senior Wrangler:''' It could be bo--\ |
| 847 | '''Archchancellor:''' Don't push it, Senior Wrangler. |
| 848 | ** And earlier in ''Hogfather'': |
| 849 | --->'''Lord Downey:''' Can I offer you a drink?\ |
| 850 | '''Auditor:''' Yes. [...] We judge you capable of performing that action. |
| 851 | ** Susan again, in ''Literature/ThiefOfTime'': |
| 852 | --->'''Susan:''' Are you [[spoiler:Lobsang]] or are you [[spoiler:Jeremy]]?\ |
| 853 | '''Time:''' Yes.\ |
| 854 | '''Susan:''' Yes, I walked into that. Are you [[spoiler:Lobsang]] ''and'' are you [[spoiler:Jeremy]]?\ |
| 855 | '''Time:''' Much closer. Yes. |
| 856 | ** Rincewind and Eric, from ''Literature/{{Eric}}!'' |
| 857 | --->'''Rincewind:''' There's a door.\ |
| 858 | '''Eric:''' Where does it go?\ |
| 859 | '''Rincewind:''' It stays where it is, I think. |
| 860 | ** Yet another one, sort of, from ''Literature/CarpeJugulum'' (paraphrased, without spoiling too much): |
| 861 | --->'''Granny Weatherwax:''' Am I dying?\ |
| 862 | '''Death:''' '''YES'''.\ |
| 863 | '''Granny Weatherwax:''' Will I die?\ |
| 864 | '''Death:''' '''YES'''.\ |
| 865 | (''{{beat}}'')\ |
| 866 | '''Granny Weatherwax:''' But to you, [[WeAllDieSomeday everyone is dying, and everyone will die, right]]?\ |
| 867 | '''Death:''' '''YES'''.\ |
| 868 | '''Granny Weatherwax:''' [[CasualDangerDialogue So you aren't actually bein' a lot of help, strictly speakin'.]] |
| 869 | ** Death is fond of this. When Granny was presented a choice between the light and the darkness (long story) she asked him if he had any advice. He replied: |
| 870 | --->'''Death:''' '''CHOOSE RIGHT.''' |
| 871 | ** And another in ''Literature/WyrdSisters''... |
| 872 | --->''Demons were like genies or philosophy professors -- if you didn't word things exactly right, they delighted in giving you absolutely accurate [...] answers.'' |
| 873 | ** As mentioned in ''Literature/{{Hogfather}}'', when questioned about the origins of life, the philosopher Didactylos set forth this theory: |
| 874 | --->'''Didactylos:''' Things just happen. What the hell? |
| 875 | ** Moist's wonderful use of this trope in a BavarianFireDrill during ''Literature/MakingMoney'': |
| 876 | --->'''Guard:''' Why's there only one of you?\ |
| 877 | '''Moist:''' I don't know. You'd have to ask my mum and dad. |
| 878 | ** In ''Literature/FeetOfClay'' Vimes becomes very angry and hits a table in the Rats Chamber with an axe. The next morning, when Vetinari asks him what it is, he says "It's an axe, sir." Of course, Vetinari then proceeds to snark about how quickly he figured that out and ask the real question, which is why it was stuck in the table. |
| 879 | ** Earlier in the same book, Vetinari asks Vimes why he punched the leader of the Assassin's Guild in the face, to receive the reply: "Couldn't find a dagger, sir." |
| 880 | ** In ''Literature/CarpeJugulum'', Shawn Ogg checks if General Tacticus's famous book of tactics has any advice on what to do when one army is based in a well-fortified structure on superior ground and the other isn't. Tacticus's advice is to be the one that is. Though later in the series he turns out to have genuine advice on what to do if you aren't: If the enemy's got the fortress, you make sure they ''stay'' in the fortress. |
| 881 | * In the ''Series/DoctorWho'' novel "Forever Autumn", the 10th Doctor is asked how his sonic screwdriver works by a teenage boy. He responds that it works very well. |
| 882 | * During ''Literature/GalaxyOfFear'', the Arrandas and their uncle Hoole find a human where no humans should be. They ask him how he got there, he says "I walked." |
| 883 | * In ''Literature/DoomValleyPrepSchool'', Blood Wing asks her Succubus mother if she should stick close to the Petra or avoid her. Her mother, who has discovered that Petra is Fate's Chew Toy who will unintentionally alter luck in very strange and humorous ways, replies with, “Sweety, I'm going to answer you as best I can and with all sincerity. Yes.” |
| 884 | * In the ''Literature/{{Dragaera}}'' series, this is one of the things Hawklords are known for. It's also why [[HitmanWithAHeart Vlad]] would have killed Daymar out of sheer annoyance if it wasn't for his invaluable psychic skills. |
| 885 | * An example where this is ''not'' played for laughs occurs in ''Literature/TheDresdenFiles'' novel ''Small Favor'', when Harry brings the injured {{Valkyrie|s}} Gard to [[KnightInShiningArmor Michael Carpenter's]] house for treatment. Michael's fellow Knight Sanya is there and is examining Gard, noting that she is more than human. He asks "The woman. What is she?" to which Harry responds "Injured." Sanya understands the implied rebuke immediately and apologizes. |
| 886 | * In ''Literature/TheEmptyGrave'', members of the smaller ghost-hunting agencies are required to carry papers saying who they are and explaining what case they're on, something which they all find odious and ridiculous, but have to put up with for the time being. At one point, the members of Lockwood and Co are cornered by Rupert Gale and his minions. Gale asks if they could show the papers to him and Holly Munro replies "I could. It would certainly be possible." |
| 887 | * In ''Literature/{{Eragon}}'' (first book in the ''Literature/InheritanceCycle''), Brom and Eragon's [[EstablishingCharacterMoment first meeting]] with the witch Angela involves Mathematician answers as Brom successively asks her ''if'' she knows where the house of the person he is looking for is, and then ''would'' she tell him where it is, both her answers being in the affirmative. Brom and Eragon then stand there waiting until she looks up and tells them that, yes, she knows where the house is, and yes, she will tell them where it is, but they never directly asked her which house was the one they were looking for. |
| 888 | * The "Experimental Epistemologist" in Smullyan's 5000BC is full of this. When the completely disoriented protagonist asks the epistemologist "What should I do?", the response is "I have no idea what you SHOULD do. However, I have a friend who is an excellent moralist." |
| 889 | * ''Literature/GauntsGhosts: Ghostmaker'' has a close variant when Colonel Corbec calls in an OrbitalBombardment against a daemon disrupting operations with a psychic storm. The captain of the frigate ''Navarre'' complains that this is against normal tactics[[note]]OrbitalBombardment is normally used only ''before'' landing troops; close air-support fighters are usually used afterwards[[/note]] and asks his XO for advice. |
| 890 | -->'''Captain Wysmark:''' Your assessment, Kreff? You've spent more time with these footsloggers since they've been aboard than anyone. Is this man mad, or should I grant his request?\ |
| 891 | '''Executive Officer Kreff:''' [[TakeAThirdOption Yes... and yes, sir.]]\ |
| 892 | '''Wysmark:''' ''(grins)'' Let's see those coordinates. |
| 893 | * In ''Literature/HaloTheFallOfReach'', Master Chief is testing the MJOLNIR armor with shields. His superior instructs him to count to ten after he leaves the room before leaving himself. During that time, Chief's AI partner Cortana senses the presence of a squad of ODST Marines, and asks the Master Chief what his plan is for dealing with them. He responds, "I'm going to finish counting to ten". |
| 894 | * ''Literature/HarryPotter'': |
| 895 | ** Early in ''Literature/HarryPotterAndThePhilosophersStone'', Harry asks Hagrid what the difference is between a stalactite and a stalagmite. Hagrid replies, "Stalagmite's got an 'M' in it". Admittedly, they were hurtling through the Gringotts minecart system at the time, and Hagrid was busy trying not to throw up. |
| 896 | ** Dumbledore gets in a straighter example later on in ''Philosopher's Stone'': |
| 897 | --->'''Harry:''' Can I ask you a question, Professor?\ |
| 898 | '''Dumbledore:''' You just did. You may, however, ask me one more question. |
| 899 | ** Harry has one in ''Literature/HarryPotterAndTheHalfBloodPrince'' when Snape asks him about his copy of Advanced Potion-Making. |
| 900 | --->'''Snape:''' Then why does it have the name ‘Roonil Wazlib’ written inside the front cover?\ |
| 901 | '''Harry:''' That’s my nickname.\ |
| 902 | '''Snape:''' Your nickname?\ |
| 903 | '''Harry:''' Yeah... that’s what my friends call me. |
| 904 | ** After a particularly surreal portion of ''Literature/HarryPotterAndTheDeathlyHallows'', Harry asks if the previous discussion was real, or just in his head. His companion simply responds that being in his head wouldn't make their conversation any less real. |
| 905 | * ''Literature/TheHitchhikersGuideToTheGalaxy'': |
| 906 | ** When Zaphod learns that Marvin is waiting for them in the car park at ''Literature/TheRestaurantAtTheEndOfTheUniverse'' (and has been for several trillion years), he asks what he's doing there. Marvin's answer? Parking cars. What else would he be doing there? |
| 907 | ** "42". [[LateArrivalSpoiler For those that don't know about this]], an alien race constructs a massive supercomputer in order to learn "The answer to the question of Life, the Universe, and Everything". The computer, after seven and a half million years of computation, comes back with "42". When asked about this, the computer responds that it is able to figure out the answer, but they need another computer to calculate what the question is. When this second computer is destroyed 15 minutes before its four-and-a-half-billion-year run to find the question completes, the programmers, afraid of the mob's reaction to this nonsense, just make up the question: "[[ShoutOut How many roads]] [[Music/BobDylan must a man walk down?]]" |
| 908 | ** Arthur has one in [[Literature/TheHitchhikersGuideToTheGalaxy1 the first book]] as well: |
| 909 | -->'''Arthur Dent''': You know, it's at times like this, when I'm stuck in a Vogon airlock with a man from Betelgeuse, about to die of asphyxiation in deep space, that I really wish I'd listened to what my mother told me when I was young.\ |
| 910 | '''Ford Prefect''': Why? What did she tell you?\ |
| 911 | '''Arthur Dent''': I don't know. I didn't listen. |
| 912 | ** In ''Literature/LifeTheUniverseAndEverything'', there is the character Prak. In a court case, he was injected with too much truth serum, and then he was instructed to tell "the Truth, the Whole Truth, and Nothing But the Truth." He responds by telling them everything that is true about, well, Life, the Universe, and Everything. Everyone present had to flee, leaving him alone telling the Truth, however by the time the protagonists arrive he has finished, telling them that there's not as much to it as one might expect, that he has forgotten it all now, but some of the best bits involved frogs and Arthur Dent. |
| 913 | * ''How Rude!'', an etiquette book aimed at teenagers, contains an anecdote from the author. He attempted to call a friend of his and the friend's five-year-old son answered. When the author asked if his daddy was there, the boy replied, "Yes." |
| 914 | * Creator/DavidEddings' ''Literature/TheBelgariad''. One of the most memorable ones was when Durnik went to ask a fisherman about the situation on the other side of a river. |
| 915 | -->'''Belgarath:''' Well?\ |
| 916 | '''Durnik:''' The fish are biting. |
| 917 | -->'''Belgarath:''' I meant on the other side.\ |
| 918 | '''Durnik:''' I did not ask, but if the fish are biting on this side, it would only stand to reason they are biting over there too, doesn't it? |
| 919 | * In ''[[Literature/NightWatchSeries The Last Watch]]'', when [[spoiler:Edgar]] uses a truth spell on Rustam, this exchange takes place: |
| 920 | -->'''[[spoiler:Edgar]]:''' How can I take the Crown of All Things?\ |
| 921 | '''Rustam:''' With your hands. |
| 922 | ** Weirdly, this answer is wrong. |
| 923 | * Jarlaxle the drow from Creator/RASalvatore's series of [[Literature/TheLegendOfDrizzt Drizzt]] books is so fond of the Mathematician's Answer that "Yes" might as well be his catch phrase. |
| 924 | * This is used to fight mind control in the ''Literature/MagicKingdomOfLandover'', when someone is forced to answer questions. |
| 925 | -->'''Ben:''' Where can I find the dragon?\ |
| 926 | '''Nightshade:''' Everywhere. |
| 927 | * In ''Literature/TheMarvelousLandOfOz'', Mombi tries this in an unsuccessful attempt to avoid Glinda's questions. |
| 928 | --> '''Glinda''': Why did the Wizard pay you three visits?\ |
| 929 | '''Mombi''': Because I would not come to him. |
| 930 | * In Scott Meyer's ''Literature/MasterOfFormalities'', the entire palace of [[FeudalFuture House Jakabitus]] is coated with a layer of nanites which perform various functions. If someone is injured, all he has to do is to put the wound against a wall or the floor, as the nanites are programmed to eliminate germs and seal wounds as a first-aid measure until the medical staff arrives, which usually happens within minutes. Everyone notes that the nanites work well with the medical staff, but any questions on how they do it is always met with the answer "Seamlessly." |
| 931 | * ''Literature/{{Momo|1973}}'' is a HeartwarmingOrphan and doesn't really know how old she is. When asked: |
| 932 | --> ''"As far as I can remember... I've always been around."'' |
| 933 | * From ''[[Literature/PhulesCompany Phule's Paradise]]'', Phule's butler pulls one of these on a hotel manager: |
| 934 | -->'''Bombest:''' How do you do it?\ |
| 935 | '''Beeker:''' Sir?\ |
| 936 | '''Bombest:''' You're a fairly ordinary guy, not at all like Mr. Phule or the uniformed fanatics he's associating with. How do you do your job?\ |
| 937 | '''Beeker:''' Very well, sir.\ |
| 938 | '''Bombest:''' Excuse me? |
| 939 | * In ''Literature/PsyChangeling'', being emotionless and thus ruled by logic, most Silent [[PsychicPowers Psys]] tend to give those. |
| 940 | * In ''Literature/TheSack'', the titular character is big on these when not asked specific questions: |
| 941 | -->'''Committee Member:''' Where would you find an individual capable of conversing intelligently with so wise a creature as you?\ |
| 942 | '''The Sack:''' Here. |
| 943 | * In Creator/DavidWeber's ''Literature/{{Safehold}}'' series, Nimue/Merlin's AI assistant Owl persists in responding to her/his questions with literal answers, despite the manufacturer's assertion that it's supposed to learn to reply colloquially. It finally begins to show some improvements in the fourth book, ''A Mighty Fortress''. |
| 944 | * The Angel, a character in Mike Resnick's ''Literature/SantiagoAMythOfTheFarFuture'' does it several times: |
| 945 | -->"How are you going to ...?"\ |
| 946 | "Efficiently."\ |
| 947 | \ |
| 948 | "What did you cut him with?"\ |
| 949 | "Something sharp." |
| 950 | * ''Literature/SkulduggeryPleasant'' has this exchange: |
| 951 | --> '''Fletcher:''' How did you beat them?\ |
| 952 | '''Skulduggery:''' With unimaginable skill. |
| 953 | ** This seems to be Skulduggery's preferred form of answer. |
| 954 | --> '''Valkyrie:''' What is it?\ |
| 955 | '''Skulduggery:''' It's a box.\ |
| 956 | '''Valkyrie:''' What kind of box?\ |
| 957 | '''Skulduggery:''' A wooden one.\ |
| 958 | ''{{beat}}''\ |
| 959 | '''Valkyrie:''' OK, I'll try this. Why are we hiding from a box?\ |
| 960 | '''Skulduggery:''' We're not. We're hiding from what's inside the box. |
| 961 | * Raymond Smullyan collected these: |
| 962 | ** General asks computer a two-part question: "1. Will the rocket reach the moon? 2. Will the rocket return to Earth?" Computer answers "Yes." General asks, "Yes ''what''?" Computer answers "Yes, sir." |
| 963 | ** "Where does this road go?" "It isn't going anywhere. It's just staying put." |
| 964 | ** One Vermont farmer approaches another. "My horse is sick. What did you give your horse when it was sick?" "Hay and molasses." Two weeks later: "I gave my horse hay and molasses, and it died." "Yep, so did mine." |
| 965 | * Yet another of Creator/PeterDavid's favorite literature tricks to tweak the nose of higher-class people (especially Vulcans in his ''Franchise/StarTrek'' novels): The high-class person asks, "May I ask where you're going?" The person answers, "Yes". It takes the Vulcan a second to comprehend. |
| 966 | ** FridgeBrilliance: if there's ''anyone'' you'd expect to understand the Mathematician's Answer trope, it would be a Vulcan. ''But'' the Vulcan is speaking what is, for him, a second language, and probably thinks of that particular construction as an idiom with only a loose connection to its literal meaning. |
| 967 | * This exchange from ''Literature/AStormOfSwords'': |
| 968 | -->'''[[spoiler:Bran]]:''' Maybe we shouldn't stay here.\ |
| 969 | '''[[spoiler:Meera]]:''' By the well? Or in the Nightfort?\ |
| 970 | '''[[spoiler:Bran]]:''' Yes. |
| 971 | ** Another example from the same book. Jamie Lannister, being interrogated by Catelyn Stark about the circumstances of an attempt made on Brann Stark's life after he witnessed something incriminating, uses this to avoid giving away any of his true reasons. |
| 972 | -->'''Catelyn:''' You pushed my son out a window. Why?\ |
| 973 | '''Jamie:''' I hoped the fall would kill him. |
| 974 | * In ''Literature/WarlocksOfTheSigil'', Kole writes "yes" for age and gender in her extremely lack-luster information packet. |
| 975 | * In the book ''Literature/TheWestingGame'', Jake Wexler lists his position as "standing or sitting when not lying down." |
| 976 | * ''Literature/ForestKingdom'': In the ''Hawk & Fisher'' spinoff series' book 1, when Hawk and Fisher question suspects about the two murders under a truthspell, all the suspects can correctly answer "No" when asked if they murdered Victim #1 and Victim #2. They can honestly say this because the two deaths were the handiwork of different killers. |
| 977 | * ''Literature/TheNeverendingStory'': Referred to as dream words for the Childlike Empress' response: |
| 978 | -->'''Bastian:''' Where are we, Moon Child?\ |
| 979 | '''Moon Child:''' I am with you, and you are with me. |
| 980 | * ''Literature/SacredGround'' by Creator/MercedesLackey has the smart-aleck David ask Mooncrow, "Are you a shaman or a showman?" Mooncrow responds with "Yes." In this case, Mooncrow's point is that you can't have one without the other; a shaman has to be a bit of a showman to get his lessons across, and a showman has to have a bit of the shaman in him if he's going to put on a good show. |
| 981 | * Played straight in Robert Heinlein's ''Literature/StrangerInAStrangeLand'' with the concept of the Fair Witness. When a Fair Witness is asked what color a house is, she replies that "It's white on this side." A Fair Witness would not infer that the other side was white as well. |
| 982 | * In ''Smith and Jones: Head to Head'', a script book of the sketches from ''Series/AlasSmithAndJones'', the introduction answers some common questions about the routine. These include: |
| 983 | -->''Do the characters have names?''\ |
| 984 | Probably, yes.\ |
| 985 | ''What are they?''\ |
| 986 | We don't know. |
| 987 | * ''Literature/TheLeftHandOfDarkness'': |
| 988 | ** A lord once asked the [[{{Seers}} Foretellers]], "On what day shall I die?"; they answered "on the nineteenth day", not specifying the month or year. The lord's lover Herbor then asked ''how long'' the lord would live and was told "Longer than Herbor". The lord snapped, killed Herbor, and soon committed suicide -- [[SelfFulfillingProphecy on the nineteenth day of the month]]. |
| 989 | ** Having heard such stories, a very skeptical Genly asks the Foretellers whether the planet Gethen will join the Ekumene within the next five years, expecting some coy wordplay. {{Subverted|Trope}} when they answer "Yes" -- and they're proven right. |
| 990 | * ''Literature/TheVazulaChronicles'': Dragons are very literal-minded and often give these. In ''A Kingdom Threatened'', Heath jokes that the dragon Rekavidur sounds like he's planning to murder him, and Reka replies, "Impossible. Even if I were to kill you, it would not be a murder. There is no consequence among my kind for dragons killing humans. Only for showing aggression toward one another." |
| 991 | * In ''Literature/TheSearchForDelicious'', Gaylen asks a shepherd boy for information, but thanks to [[TheUsurper Hemlock]]'s lies he thinks Gaylen is up to no good, so he gives answers that are as literal and unhelpful as possible. Gaylen asks him what weekday it is, if he saw a man riding a large gray horse wearing a cape, and how long it would take Gaylen to ride to the next town. The boy answers that it's a strong day, not a weak day, that he would remember seeing a horse wearing a cape, and that it will take Gaylen a very long time to get to the next town, since his horse is standing still. |
| 992 | [[/folder]] |
| 993 | |
| 994 | [[folder:Live-Action TV]] |
| 995 | * ''Series/TheAmericans'': When Claudia identifies a woman in the US as a Nazi collaborator who killed Soviet [=POWs=] based on them being the same age and height, Philip asks whether this means they're really the same person, or just share the characteristics. Claudia says "Yes". |
| 996 | * ''Series/{{Andromeda}}'': |
| 997 | -->'''Dylan Hunt:''' Are you dead or alive?\ |
| 998 | '''Trance Gemini:''' Yes.\ |
| 999 | '''Dylan Hunt:''' Crystal clear as usual. |
| 1000 | ** Given that Trance is [[spoiler:the avatar of a star]], this makes some sense. |
| 1001 | ** Another Trance Gemini moment (with a touch of DeadpanSnarker), when she locates an imprisoned Dylan Hunt and offers him water; |
| 1002 | --->'''Dylan Hunt''': Water...How...\ |
| 1003 | '''Trance Gemini''': Well, when two hydrogen atoms love each other very much, they bond with an oxygen atom... |
| 1004 | * On ''Series/{{Angel}}'', after Angel gets in a fight with Buffy and tells her to get out of LA. |
| 1005 | -->'''Wesley:''' Do you want to go after her?\ |
| 1006 | '''Angel:''' Yes. ''[He doesn't move.]'' |
| 1007 | * In ''Series/TheATeam'', an exchange between Hannibal and Murdock goes something like this: |
| 1008 | -->'''Hannibal:''' How does that sound?\ |
| 1009 | '''Murdock:''' Well, Colonel, it doesn't make much of a sound at all! |
| 1010 | * ''Series/BabylonFive'': |
| 1011 | ** The [[SufficientlyAdvancedAlien Vorlons]] love this trope. |
| 1012 | --->'''Kosh:''' They are alone. They are a dying people. We should let them pass.\ |
| 1013 | '''Sinclair:''' Who? The Narns or the Centauri?\ |
| 1014 | '''Kosh:''' Yes. |
| 1015 | ** Everything that Kosh says is not exactly helpful: |
| 1016 | --->'''Sheridan:''' Ambassador, I've been looking for you. Um, last week, after you saved my life, I didn't really get a chance to thank you properly. I've tried to reach you since then, but you haven't answered my calls. Is everything all right?\ |
| 1017 | '''Kosh:''' Being seen by so many at once was a great strain. I returned to my ship to rest. You have a question?\ |
| 1018 | '''Sheridan:''' Nobody knows it was you. Everyone saw something different, something from the -- the legends of their own world. But it was still a terrible risk. After taking such care to hide what you really are, why take that chance?\ |
| 1019 | '''Kosh:''' It was necessary.\ |
| 1020 | '''Sheridan:''' (sighs) Well, as answers go, short, to the point, utterly useless, and totally consistent with what I've come to ''expect'' from a Vorlon.\ |
| 1021 | '''Kosh:''' Good.\ |
| 1022 | '''Sheridan:''' You know, I just had a thought. You've been back and forth to your homeworld so many times since you got here -- how do I know you're the same Vorlon? Inside that encounter suit, you could be anyone.\ |
| 1023 | '''Kosh:''' I have always been here.\ |
| 1024 | '''Sheridan:''' Oh yeah? You said that about me, too.\ |
| 1025 | '''Kosh:''' Yes.\ |
| 1026 | '''Sheridan:''' I really ''hate'' it when you do that.\ |
| 1027 | '''Kosh:''' Good. |
| 1028 | ** In one case, Sheridan had asked what was in the random access hatch Kosh had led him to. Kosh's answer was "One moment of perfect beauty." Sheridan {{lampshade|Hanging}}s this: "Well, as answers go, short, to the point, utterly useless and totally consistent with what I've come to expect from a Vorlon." It turns out, this is a completely factual statement, though it makes no sense [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jli3ruqWYlc until you can see the context]]. This gets {{lampshade|Hanging}}d again in the same episode when Ivanova asks Sheridan what Kosh showed him. Sheridan responds "Beauty... in the dark." Ivanova remarks that Kosh's lessons must be working, because Sheridan is starting to talk like a Vorlon. |
| 1029 | ** According to the RPG, the Vorlon don't usually do it on purpose: their language is fully telepathic, and most of the usually deep meaning is lost in translation due them not being used at voicing it. Then again, sometimes we get Vorlon like Kosh, who ''is'' capable of expressing himself (relatively) well with a voice but still leaves out details, either to have people think and realize what he mean by themselves, because what he was asked is meant to stay secret, or [[ItAmusedMe just for the hell of it]]. |
| 1030 | ** The Drakh do the same in season 4: "Drakh? Is that your name or your species?" "Yes." |
| 1031 | ** Creator/JMichaelStraczynski himself has [[http://www.midwinter.com/lurk/guide/038.html used it on occasion.]] (warning: link contains spoilers) "Was Kosh's line about Sheridan going to Z'ha'dum a warning or a threat?" "Yes." |
| 1032 | ** At the Year-End feast in "[[Recap/BabylonFiveS01E05TheParliamentOfDreams The Parliament of Dreams]]", Londo asks "Do you know what the last Xon said before he died? AAAAHHHHH!" |
| 1033 | ** When G'Kar gets let out of jail [[spoiler:for his MindRape of Londo]] in "[[Recap/BabylonFiveS03E09PointOfNoReturn Point of No Return]]", he tells Ta'Lon of a revelation he had. Ta'Lon asks what kind of revelation. G'Kar tries this trope on Ta'Lon, who is having none of it. |
| 1034 | --->'''G'Kar''': A most profound and substantial one, Ta'Lon. The kind of revelation that transforms your mind, your soul, your heart-even your flesh-so that you are a new creature, reborn in the instant of understanding.\ |
| 1035 | '''Ta'Lon''': That was a stirring reply, Citizen G'Kar. Unfortunately, while all answers are replies, not all replies are answers. You did not answer the question that I asked. |
| 1036 | * ''Series/BarneyMiller'': |
| 1037 | ** Wojo is questioning a prostitute he has just arrested: |
| 1038 | -->'''Wojo''': Any prior convictions?\ |
| 1039 | '''Prostitute''': I used to think that cleanliness was next to godliness. |
| 1040 | ** In an episode centered around the 1976 Presidential election, Wojo is inordinately interested in whom Barney's going to vote for. When he asks, Barney replies with "All of them, but of course only one for each office." When Wojo asks "well, what about for President", Barney snarks "Yes, I'll be voting for one of those also." |
| 1041 | * In Rik Mayall's ''Series/BelieveNothing'' (made when David Blunkett was Britain's Home Secretary): |
| 1042 | -->'''Receptionist:''' The Home Secretary is in the waiting room. He wants to know if he can see you.\ |
| 1043 | '''Adonis Cnut:''' Of course he can't see me. He's blind. |
| 1044 | * ''Series/BetterOffTed'': When the company gets sued for product negligence, Ted states that Veronica is an old pro at depositions by volunteering as little information as possible (TruthInTelevision, your lawyer always advises to give as little information as possible while answering questions): |
| 1045 | -->'''Lawyer:''' Could you describe your job?\ |
| 1046 | '''Veronica:''' Yes.\ |
| 1047 | '''Lawyer:''' ''How'' would you describe your job?\ |
| 1048 | '''Veronica:''' Cleverly. |
| 1049 | * ''Series/TheBigBangTheory'' had an instance when Raj (who usually has trouble talking to women) was getting a little too attached to Siri, to the point that his friends described it as "dating a phone". When Bernadette asked if it was cute or creepy, Howard simply said "uh-huh". |
| 1050 | ** In the episode "The Engagement Reaction" |
| 1051 | --->'''Leonard''': So, how is she?\ |
| 1052 | '''Howard''': They’re running tests. I don’t know. It may have been a heart attack or heart-attack-like event.\ |
| 1053 | '''Penny''': What’s the difference?\ |
| 1054 | '''Sheldon''': A heart-attack-like event is an event that’s like a heart attack.\ |
| 1055 | '''Penny''': Thanks for clearing that up. |
| 1056 | ** Also this exchange from "The Apology Insufficiency" after someone knocks on the door: |
| 1057 | --->'''Leonard:''' Want to get that?\ |
| 1058 | '''Sheldon:''' Not particularly.\ |
| 1059 | '''Leonard:''' ''Could'' you get that?\ |
| 1060 | '''Sheldon:''' I suppose I could if I were asked.\ |
| 1061 | '''Leonard:''' Would you ''please'' get that?\ |
| 1062 | '''Sheldon:''' Of course. ''(beat)'' Why do you have to make things so complicated? |
| 1063 | * When ''Series/{{Blackadder}}'' tries to teach [[TheDitz Baldrick]] addition, this becomes an OverlyLongGag when Baldrick gives pretty much every possible correct answer except the most obvious one: |
| 1064 | -->'''Blackadder:''' If I have two beans, and then I add two more beans, what do I have?\ |
| 1065 | '''Baldrick:''' Some beans.\ |
| 1066 | '''Blackadder:''' ...let's try again shall we? ... What does that make?\ |
| 1067 | '''Baldrick:''' A very small casserole. |
| 1068 | ** When Prince Edmund asks how the Archbishop of Canterbury died, he is told "Horribly." |
| 1069 | * In episode six of the first season of ''Series/BoardwalkEmpire'', Margaret tells a friend in the Temperance League that a man has made her an offer. The friend asks, "Financial? Domestic? Sexual?", and Margaret replies, "[[TheMistress Yes]]." |
| 1070 | * In ''Series/BreakingBad'', Walt calls up Mike to find out where Jesse is. |
| 1071 | -->'''Walt:''' Where is Jesse?\ |
| 1072 | '''Mike:''' He's with me.\ |
| 1073 | '''Walt:''' Put Jesse on!\ |
| 1074 | '''Jesse:''' Yo.\ |
| 1075 | '''Walt:''' Where are you?\ |
| 1076 | '''Jesse:''' I'm with Mike. |
| 1077 | * ''Series/{{Cheers}}'': |
| 1078 | ** In "What Is... Cliff Clavin?", Cliff attempted to use such an answer on ''Series/{{Jeopardy}}'' when asked to identify three actors by their original, non-stage names. His reply was "Who are three people who have never been in my kitchen?" Correct, but ... |
| 1079 | ** One conversation: |
| 1080 | --->'''Frasier''': O death in life, the days that are no more -- who said that?\ |
| 1081 | '''Woody''': Who said what?\ |
| 1082 | '''Frasier''': "O death in life, the days that are no more."\ |
| 1083 | '''Woody''': You did.\ |
| 1084 | '''Frasier''': No, I mean, who said it first?\ |
| 1085 | '''Woody''': You said it both times. |
| 1086 | ** Another example had Cliff give a long and detailed explanation about why they drank ice cold beer in the middle of winter (which essentially centred around the need to equalise your internal and external temperatures). When he had finished, Carla then asked him why they also drank it summer. His response was "What else are we going to do with it?". |
| 1087 | * In ''[[Series/GoodLuckCharlie Charlie]] [[Series/ShakeItUp Shakes It Up]]'', Deuce says he "has the situation under control", which prompts this: |
| 1088 | -->'''Teddy:''' So when he says he has it under control, should we be relieved or worried?\ |
| 1089 | '''Cece & Rocky:''' Yes. |
| 1090 | * ''Series/ElChavoDelOcho'': |
| 1091 | ** In one episode, El Chavo is selling refreshments and agrees to reveal Don Ramon's location to Mr. Barriga if the landlord buys one. El Chavo then reveals that Don Ramon is still in the country. |
| 1092 | ** Also, whenever Don Ramón [[DontMakeMeTakeMyBeltOff tries to threaten La Chilindrina with his belt]]: |
| 1093 | -->'''Don Ramón:''' Do you know what happens if I take my belt off?\ |
| 1094 | '''Chilindrina''': Yeah, you drop your pants. |
| 1095 | |
| 1096 | * ''Series/ChicagoFire'': %% is this really an example? |
| 1097 | -->'''Casey''': Is there anything flammable in these boxes?\ |
| 1098 | '''Business owner''': No, sir. \ |
| 1099 | ''[barrels burst into flame]'' |
| 1100 | |
| 1101 | * ''Series/{{Community}}'': "Basic Human Anatomy" |
| 1102 | -->'''Annie:''' So, I'm number two again, which is what it is. But you know, if I'm not going to be valedictorian, I'm glad it will be you.\ |
| 1103 | '''Shirley:''' Me too.\ |
| 1104 | '''Annie:''' You mean, you hope it's me if it's not you, or that you're glad it's you?\ |
| 1105 | '''Shirley:''' Yes. |
| 1106 | * ''Series/TheDailyShow'': |
| 1107 | ** In a parody of government officials avoiding giving direct answers, Creator/StephenColbert and Creator/SteveCarell had [[http://www.cc.com/video-clips/u2nnaa/the-daily-show-with-jon-stewart-even-stevphen---secrets this exchange]]: |
| 1108 | --->'''Stephen''': There are things I don't tell you.\ |
| 1109 | '''Steve''': Oh, you tell me everything.\ |
| 1110 | '''Stephen''': No, I don't.\ |
| 1111 | '''Steve''': Like what?\ |
| 1112 | '''Stephen''': I can't tell you.\ |
| 1113 | '''Steve''': Well, does it involve you or me?\ |
| 1114 | '''Stephen''': Yes.\ |
| 1115 | '''Steve''': Who? Me, or you?\ |
| 1116 | '''Stephen''': Steve, we've exhausted this topic. |
| 1117 | ** Another example: In 2003, when Prince Charles was alleged to have had a gay experience, Britain's strict libel and slander laws prevented anyone from commenting publicly on the charge. Colbert, doing a report on the scandal, was asked by Creator/JonStewart if he had learned any specifics. Colbert said, "Yes I have, Jon." |
| 1118 | * ''Series/DeadlyClass'': Petra gives one after calling off her threesome with Lex and Billy because all the feelings are discomforting her, the former asks if it's theirs or feelings generally. She says "Yes". |
| 1119 | * ''Series/DoctorWho'': |
| 1120 | ** [[Recap/DoctorWhoS5E7TheWheelInSpace "The Wheel in Space"]]: |
| 1121 | --->'''Zoe:''' This Doctor friend of yours. Is he a scientist?\ |
| 1122 | '''Jamie:''' He is in a way I suppose, yes.\ |
| 1123 | '''Zoe:''' What's his specialty?\ |
| 1124 | '''Jamie:''' His what?\ |
| 1125 | '''Zoe:''' Well, is he a physicist, biochemist, astronomer, biometrician?\ |
| 1126 | '''Jamie:''' [[OmnidisciplinaryScientist Yes, he is.]] |
| 1127 | ** [[Recap/DoctorWhoS22E4TheTwoDoctors "The Two Doctors"]]: |
| 1128 | --->'''The Doctor:''' I closed my respiratory passages as soon as I detected any danger.\ |
| 1129 | '''Peri:''' Well, then how did you breathe?\ |
| 1130 | '''The Doctor:''' With difficulty. |
| 1131 | ** [[Recap/DoctorWhoS31E1TheEleventhHour "The Eleventh Hour"]]: |
| 1132 | --->'''The Doctor:''' Twenty minutes. Run home to your loved ones and kiss them all goodbye, or stay and help me.\ |
| 1133 | '''Amy:''' No. ''[she traps his tie in a car door and demands an explanation]'' |
| 1134 | ** [[Recap/DoctorWhoS31E5FleshAndStone "Flesh and Stone"]]: River is working with a bunch of people who know nothing about the Doctor: |
| 1135 | --->'''Bishop Octavian:''' Doctor Song, do you trust [the Doctor]?\ |
| 1136 | '''River:''' I absolutely trust him.\ |
| 1137 | '''Bishop Octavian:''' He's not [[{{Cloudcuckoolander}} some kind of madman]], is he?\ |
| 1138 | ''[{{beat}}]''\ |
| 1139 | '''River:''' I absolutely trust him. |
| 1140 | ** [[Recap/DoctorWhoS31E13TheBigBang "The Big Bang"]]: |
| 1141 | *** An exchange between the Doctor and Rory: |
| 1142 | ---->'''The Doctor:''' So, 2,000 years. How did you do?\ |
| 1143 | '''Rory:''' Kept out of trouble.\ |
| 1144 | '''The Doctor:''' Oh. How?\ |
| 1145 | '''Rory:''' [[DoomMagnet Unsuccessfully.]] |
| 1146 | *** Between the Doctor and River: |
| 1147 | ---->'''The Doctor:''' Are you married, River?\ |
| 1148 | '''River:''' Are you asking?\ |
| 1149 | '''The Doctor:''' Yes.\ |
| 1150 | '''River:''' Yes.\ |
| 1151 | '''The Doctor:''' No, hang on. Did you think I was asking you to marry me, or asking if you were married?\ |
| 1152 | '''River:''' Yes.\ |
| 1153 | '''The Doctor:''' No, but was that yes, or yes?\ |
| 1154 | '''River:''' Yes. |
| 1155 | ** [[Recap/DoctorWho2010CSAChristmasCarol "A Christmas Carol"]]: |
| 1156 | ---> '''Kazran Sardick:''' If you're my baby-sitter, why are you climbing in the window?\ |
| 1157 | '''The Doctor:''' Because if I was climbing out the window I'd be going in the wrong direction. |
| 1158 | ** [[Recap/DoctorWhoS32E4TheDoctorsWife "The Doctor's Wife"]]: |
| 1159 | --->'''Amy:''' How do you leave the universe?\ |
| 1160 | '''The Doctor:''' With enormous difficulty! |
| 1161 | ** In [[Recap/DoctorWhoS32E7AGoodManGoesToWar "A Good Man Goes to War"]], we meet Madame Vastra, a female Silurian in the late 1800s: |
| 1162 | --->'''Madame Vastra:''' UsefulNotes/JackTheRipper has taken his last victim.\ |
| 1163 | '''Jenny Flint:''' How did you find him?\ |
| 1164 | '''Madame Vastra:''' [[ToServeMan Stringy, but tasty all the same. I won't be needing dinner.]] |
| 1165 | ** During the events of [[Recap/DoctorWhoS33E13TheNameOfTheDoctor "The Name of the Doctor"]]: |
| 1166 | --->'''Vastra:''' Professor. Help yourself to some tea.\ |
| 1167 | '''River:''' ''[she has a champagne bucket]'' Why, thank you.\ |
| 1168 | '''Jenny Flint:''' How did you do that?!\ |
| 1169 | '''River:''' ''[smiling]'' Disgracefully. |
| 1170 | ** Played with in [[Recap/DoctorWho50thASTheDayOfTheDoctor "The Day of the Doctor"]]. The Doctor interprets Osgood's non-answer literally: |
| 1171 | --->'''The Doctor:''' Hey! You! Are you sciency?\ |
| 1172 | '''Osgood:''' Yes.\ |
| 1173 | '''The Doctor:''' Got a name?\ |
| 1174 | '''Osgood:''' Yes.\ |
| 1175 | '''The Doctor:''' Good. I've always wanted to meet someone called "Yes". |
| 1176 | * In ''Series/{{Dollhouse}}'', the newly composited Echo gives one to Alpha, after turning on him: |
| 1177 | -->'''Alpha:''' Something must have gone wrong with the composite.\ |
| 1178 | '''Echo:''' Nothing went wrong. Every imprint this Active has ever had is alive and awake in her head right now.\ |
| 1179 | '''Alpha:''' Then why did you hit me in the head with a pipe?\ |
| 1180 | '''Echo:''' It was handy! |
| 1181 | * On one episode of ''Series/DragonsDen'', the investors tried to get more specifics from a CloudCuckoolander inventor: |
| 1182 | -->'''Theo Paphitis:''' What have you got a patent for? \ |
| 1183 | '''Derek Cozens:''' Because it's a good idea! |
| 1184 | * From the ''Series/EvenStevens'' episode "Raiders of the Lost Sausage": |
| 1185 | -->'''Steve:''' Beans, why are you dumping dirt in my laundry room?\ |
| 1186 | '''Beans:''' [[ItMakesSenseInContext Because there's a big scary bird in the backyard!]] |
| 1187 | * Sometimes pops up on ''Series/FamilyFeud'' questions, mainly ones that require numerical answers. |
| 1188 | ** On at least two instances, "Morning" was given for "Name a time that most people get up." On the first, the same contestant answered "Night" for "Name a time that most people go to bed." [[StrangeMindsThinkAlike That got two points]]. |
| 1189 | ** When the question was, "Name something Russia is famous for", one contestant said, "Russians". |
| 1190 | ** On the Combs version, there was the question "What birthday do men dread the most?" Instead of giving a milestone such as fortieth or fiftieth, a contestant guessed "Their wife's" which got two points. |
| 1191 | ** A Harvey-era question asked "How old do you think Joan Rivers is?" with a contestant answering "Old." |
| 1192 | * In ''Series/{{Farscape}}'', Scorpius is being interrogated: |
| 1193 | -->'''Interrogator:''' Why are you here?\ |
| 1194 | '''Scorpius:''' Because you caught me. |
| 1195 | * In ''Series/TheFlash2014'', after the disastrous encounter with the Reverse-Flash, Joe explained to the stunned Eddie about the existence of meta-humans. He appears to convince Eddie that the Flash is one of the good ones, despite Eddie having been attacked by the whammied Flash in an earlier episode. We then get this exchange: |
| 1196 | -->'''Eddie Thawne:''' And the Flash. Do you know who he is?\ |
| 1197 | '''Joe West:''' Yeah, I do. He's the guy that saved both of our lives tonight. |
| 1198 | ** For reference, Joe really does know that Barry is the Flash, but it's not his secret to reveal. |
| 1199 | * From the opening scene of the later Mayall/Edmondson/Planer/Elton series, ''Series/FilthyRichAndCatflap'': |
| 1200 | -->'''Richie''': What are you doing in my bed?\ |
| 1201 | '''Eddie''': Well I was sleeping. But now I'm talking to a git. |
| 1202 | * ''Series/TheFollowing'' has this exchange in "Whips and Regrets": |
| 1203 | -->'''Parker''': So, are you an alcoholic, or just a problem drinker?\ |
| 1204 | '''Hardy''': Yes. |
| 1205 | * ''Series/{{Friends}}'': |
| 1206 | -->'''Joey''': Hey Phoebes, do you think it would be okay if I asked out your sister?\ |
| 1207 | '''Phoebe''': Why? Why would you want to do that?\ |
| 1208 | '''Joey''': So that if we went out on a date, she'd be there. |
| 1209 | * ''Series/GameOfThrones'': |
| 1210 | -->'''Tyrion:''' What sort of accent is that?\ |
| 1211 | '''Shae:''' Foreign. |
| 1212 | ** And again: |
| 1213 | --->'''Catelyn:''' Why [[spoiler:did you push my son from the window?]]\ |
| 1214 | '''Jaime:''' [[spoiler:I hoped the fall would kill him.]] |
| 1215 | * The French-Canadian sitcom ''Series/UnGarsUneFille'' (A Guy and a Girl), has the Guy in the title ask his girlfriend which of two wines she wants for supper. She answers "Yes." This prompts him to reply "When someone gives you a choice between two things, you can't answer with yes! If you're afraid of committing to a decision, do you want me to pick for you, or do you want me to leave choices up to you?" Her answer? "Yes! Yes Yes Yes!" |
| 1216 | * In ''Series/GetSmart'', one of Maxwell Smart's many catchphrases is a mathematician's answer. When asked how he did something, or how he planned to do something, he would respond: "With great difficulty." |
| 1217 | ** ...and, loving it. |
| 1218 | * A guest of ''Series/TheGoldenGirls'' tells the girls his wife has just had triplets. "What are they?" asks Dorothy. Rose answers, "That's when three babies are born at the same time." |
| 1219 | * During an end-of-term quiz at ''Series/GrangeHill'': |
| 1220 | --> '''Mr Baxter''': "Transubstantiation" is a difficult word. Can anyone spell it?\ |
| 1221 | '''Hughes''': Sir, you said spell "it". I, T!\ |
| 1222 | '''Mr Baxter''': (grudgingly) A point to Grange Hill. |
| 1223 | * In ''Series/HappyEndings'' Penny fakes being engaged in front of her safety Shershow, who's about to get married to a beautiful woman. |
| 1224 | -->'''Shershow:''' So Penny that's great, you got engaged. To who?\ |
| 1225 | '''Penny''' Uh... my fiancé. |
| 1226 | * In the ''Series/HoratioHornblower'' CourtroomEpisode "Retribution", Dr. Clive is asked if Captain Sawyer "was or was not fit for duty" when the lieutenants removed him from command. Clive replies "yes." The court, naturally, demands that he ''elaborate'', and it turns out this was a prelude for Clive to accuse the lieutenants of coercing him. |
| 1227 | * From ''Series/{{House}}'': |
| 1228 | -->'''Masters:''' House, how many prostitutes have you had?\ |
| 1229 | '''House:''' As in eaten? Ever? This year?\ |
| 1230 | '''Masters:''' Slept with. Since you've been here.\ |
| 1231 | '''House:''' All but one. She did my taxes. |
| 1232 | * In ''Series/TheITCrowd'', Roy runs into this trying to run tech support. |
| 1233 | -->'''Roy:''' Is it a PC, or a Mac?\ |
| 1234 | '''Judy:''' ...Yes! |
| 1235 | ** From the same episode: |
| 1236 | --->'''Roy:''' What was that name, was it Ju''lie'' or Ju''dy''?\ |
| 1237 | '''Moss:''' Yes. One of those. |
| 1238 | * ''Series/HowIMetYourMother'' dipped into this when Barney tells Ted about a special type of bingo he invented, and Ted tries to figure out the endgame, and Barney answers with an intonation like Ted's the strange one. |
| 1239 | -->'''Ted:''' So, how many people are in on this Party School Bingo thing?\ |
| 1240 | '''Barney:''' Oh, it's just me.\ |
| 1241 | '''Ted:''' So what's the point, then?\ |
| 1242 | '''Barney:''' The point is to get five in a row.\ |
| 1243 | '''Ted:''' And what do you get when you get five in a row?\ |
| 1244 | '''Barney:''' ... I get Bingo. |
| 1245 | ** Barney gets it done to him when he tries to surprise the group with tickets to "Robots versus Wrestlers". |
| 1246 | --->'''Barney:''' Guess what I've got behind my back!\ |
| 1247 | '''Lily:''' Oh, wait, wait, wait. I got this one: left.\ |
| 1248 | '''Barney:''' Wrong game, but correct. |
| 1249 | * While fictional ''Series/{{Jeopardy}}'' examples are based on the contestant's responses, the clues themselves can seem like this if you go along with the concept that they're the answers to the questions that the correct responses ask. Who, when asked "what are chairs?" would answer "George Hepplewhite was known for designing the backs of these in such shapes as hearts & shields"?! |
| 1250 | * On ''Series/JustShootMe'', when Elliot asks Dennis if he's licking stamps, Dennis answers sarcastically "I was, now I'm answering obvious questions." When a pretty model asks the same question, Dennis cordially responds "Why, yes I am." |
| 1251 | * On ''Series/KitchenNightmares'', Creator/GordonRamsay usually starts evaluating the restaurant by asking the owner what he or she thinks is the main problem. One owner responded to this question by saying, "We don't have enough customers." |
| 1252 | * ''Series/{{Lost}}'' provided a perfect example during [[spoiler:the flight to return to the island]]: |
| 1253 | -->'''Jack''': How can you ''read''? [at a time like this]\ |
| 1254 | '''Ben''': My mother taught me. |
| 1255 | ** He's lying as usual. [[spoiler:His mother died shortly after giving birth to him.]] |
| 1256 | ** Another one from when Richard Alpert gives the Time Jumping Locke a compass. |
| 1257 | --->'''Locke:''' What's it do?\ |
| 1258 | '''Alpert:''' It points North, John. |
| 1259 | * ''Series/MalcolmInTheMiddle'' has grizzled old coot Pete scrub up for a date, looking at himself in a mirror. When Francis walks in on him, we have the following gem: |
| 1260 | -->'''Francis:''' Pete, is that really you?\ |
| 1261 | '''Pete:''' ...no! It's a reflection! |
| 1262 | * ''Series/{{MASH}}'': In [[Recap/MashS3E3OfficerOfTheDay one episode]], as Hawkeye is forced to treat several Koreans who each successively give him the same ID card that says Kim Luck, this exchange happens. |
| 1263 | -->'''Hawkeye:''' Can you identify yourself?\ |
| 1264 | '''Kim Luck #2:''' This is me. |
| 1265 | * ''Series/MimpiMetropolitan'': In episode 8, Prima sees Bambang menacingly sharpening a sickle. Bambang is too angry to give a straight explanation. |
| 1266 | -->'''Prima:''' Mbang, why are you sharpening that thing?\ |
| 1267 | '''Bambang:''' To make it sharp.\ |
| 1268 | '''Prima:''' What do you want to cut?\ |
| 1269 | '''Bambang:''' Whatever can be cut. |
| 1270 | * ''Series/MockTheWeek'' has a Series/{{Jeopardy}} parody called ''If This is the Answer, What is the Question?'', which naturally wound up like the ''Jeopardy'' example above on occasion. |
| 1271 | * ''Series/MontyPythonsFlyingCircus'' had several. |
| 1272 | ** One such example with a mathematician's riposte thrown in: |
| 1273 | --->'''Woman 1''': What's on the television then?\ |
| 1274 | '''Woman 2''': ''(looks over to see the TV turned off and a penguin standing atop it)'' Looks like a penguin. Funny that penguin being there, innit? What's it doing there?\ |
| 1275 | '''Woman 1''': Standing. |
| 1276 | ** Another example occurs at one point in the Secret Service Dentists sketch, where Arthur Lemming, a customer in a book store, is thrown in a ComicStrip/SpyVsSpy [[MakesJustAsMuchSenseInContext dental-related imbroglio]], where he has no idea what's going on ([[spoiler:[[ObfuscatingStupidity or so we think]]...]]) except that it's something suspicious despite the repeated denials of the store owner, while the whole cast is repeatedly [[PutDownYourGunAndStepAway held at gunpoint]] by the [[SerialEscalation next entering character]]: |
| 1277 | --->'''Brian''': ''(holding a bazooka)'' Not so fast!\ |
| 1278 | '''All''': Brian!\ |
| 1279 | '''Arthur''': Ooh, what's that?\ |
| 1280 | '''Others''': [[CaptainObvious It's a bazooka!]] |
| 1281 | ** The sketch "How to Do It" features instructions for how to play the flute: "You blow there and you move your fingers up and down here." |
| 1282 | * One bit of edutainment featured a musical sketch with the {{Ridiculously Human Robot|s}} "Mr. Computer Man" who boasts in his song that he can do anything we humans can. When asked how to spell a simple word, he spells it out. When asked "How do you spell [[Film/MaryPoppins supercalifragilisticexpialidocious]]?" however, he [[{{Beat}} thinks a moment]] and then replies "With letters!" |
| 1283 | * ''Series/TheMuppetShow'' : |
| 1284 | ** Some dancing rats were in Creator/ChristopherReeve's dressing room. |
| 1285 | --->'''Scooter''': Christopher Reeve, fifteen seconds to curtain, Christopher!\ |
| 1286 | '''Christopher Reeve''': Oh thanks a lot, Scooter. Hey listen, can you tell me what these rats are doing in my dressing room?\ |
| 1287 | '''Scooter''': I think it's the Foxtrot. |
| 1288 | ** Kermit's contribution to a string of "fly in the soup" jokes. |
| 1289 | --->"So I ask the waiter, 'What's this fly doing in my alphabet soup?', and the waiter answers, 'Standing in for an apostrophe'." |
| 1290 | ** When Creator/JudyProwse fades into nothing at the end of a sketch: |
| 1291 | --->'''Waldorf''': Hey, she just vanished! How did she do that?\ |
| 1292 | '''Statler''': Probably like this.\ |
| 1293 | ''(He also fades into nothing.)''\ |
| 1294 | '''Waldorf''': Yep. That's probably how she did it. |
| 1295 | * ''Series/TheMysticKnightsOfTirNaNog'': In a CourtroomEpisode, Angus was facing trial and, when it seemed he'd be convicted, the truth was revealed. In the end, Angus asked the judge if he'd be acquitted or convicted without the new evidence and the judge said he'd certainly be one of those. |
| 1296 | * ''Series/MythBusters'': When Adam is taken to Jamie's secret location[[note]]Right over the border to Nevada where most of Jamie's more ''interesting'' toys are legal.[[/note]], this exchange ensues: |
| 1297 | -->'''Adam:''' Where are we?\ |
| 1298 | '''Jamie:''' We're right here. |
| 1299 | * Creator/DavidTennant once hosted a ''Series/DoctorWho''-themed episode of comedy quiz show ''Series/NeverMindTheBuzzcocks'', which featured the following question: |
| 1300 | -->'''Tennant''': Knock knock.\ |
| 1301 | '''Panellist''': Who's there?\ |
| 1302 | '''Tennant''': Doctor.\ |
| 1303 | '''Panellist''': Doctor who?\ |
| 1304 | '''Tennant''': Correct! |
| 1305 | * ''Series/TheNewlywedGame'': Bob Eubanks asked "If you don't win the game today, what would be the reason?" The husband answered "Because we didn't answer the questions right." (The answer on his wife's card read "(Because she) Laughs too much") |
| 1306 | * ''Series/NightCourt'': Bull helps deliver a baby. Asks the exhausted mother, "What is it?", wanting to know the gender. Bull: "It's a ''baby''!" |
| 1307 | * ''Series/{{NUMB3RS}}'': Although there are a few mathematicians in the group, it's actually physicist Larry who is most prone to these. |
| 1308 | -->'''Charlie''': Larry, is everything all right?\ |
| 1309 | '''Larry''': Everything? Well, I'm not sure that I can account for the state of all matter... |
| 1310 | * Famously in the ''Series/OnlyFoolsAndHorses'' episode "If They Could See Us Now", in which Del Boy is on a quiz show hosted by Jonathan Ross: |
| 1311 | -->'''Jonathan Ross:''' In what state was President Kennedy in when he was shot?\ |
| 1312 | '''Del Boy:''' Well he was in a terrible state, he died! |
| 1313 | * In ''Series/PartyDown'': |
| 1314 | -->'''Ron''': What am I not hearing?\ |
| 1315 | '''Roman''': I don't know... a squid? There are other options... |
| 1316 | ** Roman is supposed to be DJ and is not at his post. |
| 1317 | * ''Series/PersonOfInterest'' has this rather hilarious example after Root [[CarFu crashes a car]] [[ItMakesSenseInContext to keep the Victim of the Week safe]]: |
| 1318 | -->'''Finch:''' Whose car was that?!\ |
| 1319 | '''Root:''' Someone who needs a good mechanic. |
| 1320 | * ''Series/PoliceSquad'': |
| 1321 | ** A RunningGag where Frank holds a cigarette out to a witness or suspect and asks "cigarette?" The implication is that he's asking if they want one, but they always answer "Yes, I know," or "Yes, it is." |
| 1322 | ** Another example, which appeared both on the show and in one of the movies. When the squad raids a criminal hideout, a pretty gun moll asks "Is this some kind of bust?". While [[MaleGaze looking at her chest]], Drebin replies "Yes, it is very impressive". |
| 1323 | * ''Series/{{Porridge}}'': The new prison officer Beale receives some of these when he tries to act tough with experienced inmates. |
| 1324 | --> '''Beale:''' What are you in for?\ |
| 1325 | '''Oakes:''' Two years.\ |
| 1326 | '''Beale:''' I didn't mean time, I meant offence.\ |
| 1327 | '''Oakes:''' None taken.\ |
| 1328 | (Later, when meeting Fletcher)\ |
| 1329 | '''Beale:''' Long to do?\ |
| 1330 | '''Fletcher:''' (cheerfully) Long enough.\ |
| 1331 | '''Beale:''' What are you in for?\ |
| 1332 | '''Fletcher:''' Got caught. |
| 1333 | * ''Series/TheProfessionals''. In "Rogue", Doyle does this to troll Cowley when DaChief calls them on the car radio. |
| 1334 | -->'''Cowley:''' Where are you?\ |
| 1335 | '''Doyle:''' In the car.\ |
| 1336 | '''Cowley:''' I KNOW YOU'RE IN THE CAR, MAN! WHEREABOUTS? |
| 1337 | * ''Series/{{QI}}'': Given the show's habit of penalising obvious or boring answers to questions, it's often safer (and funnier) for contestants to give answers like this: |
| 1338 | ** "Atoms": |
| 1339 | ---> '''Creator/StephenFry:''' What's the difference between a hydrogen atom and a grand piano?\ |
| 1340 | '''Jeremy Hardy:''' Well, size... shape... and possibly Iraq ''did'' have the capability of splitting a grand piano. |
| 1341 | ** "Fingers and Fumbs": |
| 1342 | ---> '''Stephen:''' What do we measure feet in, in Britain?\ |
| 1343 | '''Creator/DaraOBriain:''' You measure them in a little slidey thing.[[note]]Also known as a "Brannock device".[[/note]]\ |
| 1344 | '''Stephen:''' What is the unit?\ |
| 1345 | '''Dara:''' Er, a fraction of the slidey thing?[[note]]It's a "barleycorn".[[/note]] |
| 1346 | ** "International", when talking about pilots being brought their food: |
| 1347 | ---> '''Stephen:''' Yes, it must be Deirdre with the lunch - the lunch''es''. Why do I say "lunches?"\ |
| 1348 | '''Creator/BillBailey:''' Because there's more than one! |
| 1349 | ** "Invertebrates": |
| 1350 | ---> '''Stephen:''' What do bees do better than dogs?\ |
| 1351 | '''Creator/JimmyCarr:''' Make honey? |
| 1352 | * ''{{Series/Quantico}}'': Simon notices that Nimah pins her hijab on the left sometimes, other times the right, and wonders whether this is because of her ambidexterity, or it has some cultural significance. Nimah answers "yes". This turns out to be because Simon actually saw her [[TwinSwitch twin sister Raina]], who'd pinned it on the left side, and Nimah tells her to always pin it on the right so no one notices this again. They're also opposite-handed. |
| 1353 | * ''Series/RippingYarns'': |
| 1354 | -->'''Man 1:''' What did your father say before he died?\ |
| 1355 | '''Man 2:''' EEEEUUUUURRRRRGGGGHHHHHH... *death rattle*\ |
| 1356 | '''Man 1:''' No, before that.\ |
| 1357 | '''Man 2:''' Oh. |
| 1358 | * In one episode of ''Literature/TheSaddleClub'' TV series, Stevie spills bright red soda on a shirt she "borrowed" from her brother without his permission, leading to this exchange: |
| 1359 | -->'''Stevie:''' What do you do with soda?\ |
| 1360 | '''Carole:''' (''deadpan'') Most people drink it. |
| 1361 | * ''Series/{{Scrubs}}'': |
| 1362 | -->'''Dr. Kelso:''' Would someone explain what that bird is doing in my hospital?\ |
| 1363 | '''Janitor:''' Sanchez appears to be flying, sir. I've named him Sanchez. |
| 1364 | * Done as a TakeThat to a telemarketer in an episode of ''Series/{{Seinfeld}}''. Jerry at one point answers the phone and is asked, "Would you be interested in a subscription to the New York Times?" He casually answers "Yes," before hanging up. |
| 1365 | * ''Series/ASeriesOfUnfortunateEvents2017'': In "The Penultimate Peril" the Baudelaires are working at a Hotel run by a pair of identical twin brothers, Frank and Ernest [[spoiler: who are actually triplets -Frank, Ernest, and Dewey]]. Frank is good, and Ernest is evil. However, the two make no attempts at distinguishing themselves, which causes problems for the protagonists. |
| 1366 | -->'''Klaus:''' Are you Frank or Ernest?\ |
| 1367 | '''Frank/Ernest:''' I am. |
| 1368 | * ''Series/ShaunMicallefsMadAsHell'': Leo Hatred is a master at this, particularly in this discussion of a feasibility study into the Collinsville coal-fired power plant. |
| 1369 | -->'''Shaun''': When do you expect the study to be completed?\ |
| 1370 | '''Leo''': It'll be completed when it's finished.\ |
| 1371 | '''Shaun''': But when do you expect to see it?\ |
| 1372 | '''Leo''': When they give it to us.\ |
| 1373 | '''Shaun''': And when do you expect them to give it to you?\ |
| 1374 | '''Leo''': Just before we have it.\ |
| 1375 | '''Shaun''': And when will you have it?\ |
| 1376 | '''Leo''': Just after they've given it to us.\ |
| 1377 | '''Shaun''': When will they give it to you?\ |
| 1378 | '''Leo''': When it's ready.\ |
| 1379 | '''Shaun''': When will it be ready?\ |
| 1380 | '''Leo''': When it's completed.\ |
| 1381 | '''Shaun''': When will you answer a question directly?\ |
| 1382 | '''Leo''': I'll never answer a question directly. (''{{Beat}}'') Oh, fuck. |
| 1383 | * Irene Adler seeks refuge in Baker Street in ''Series/{{Sherlock}}'': |
| 1384 | -->'''Sherlock''': So who's after you?\ |
| 1385 | '''Irene''': People who want to kill me.\ |
| 1386 | '''Sherlock''': Who's that?\ |
| 1387 | '''Irene''': Killers. |
| 1388 | * In ''Series/{{Smallville}}'', when Clark wants to talk to Lois about their relationship: |
| 1389 | -->'''Clark''': Lois, what are we doing?\ |
| 1390 | '''Lois''': I'm eating a maple donut and you're kind of invading my personal space. |
| 1391 | * In ''Series/SquareOneTV'' segment Mathnet, a musician plays AirGuitar complete with sound effects. This prompts the following exchange with George Frankly: |
| 1392 | --> '''George Frankly:''' How did you do that?\ |
| 1393 | '''Musician:''' Bloody Perfectly. |
| 1394 | * ''Franchise/StarTrek'': |
| 1395 | ** The Heisenberg compensator allows the transporter to get around the Heisenberg uncertainty principle. When asked how it works, Mike Okuda's response is '[It] works just fine, thank you.' |
| 1396 | ** ''Series/StarTrekTheOriginalSeries'': In "[[Recap/StarTrekS1E22SpaceSeed Space Seed]]", a recently awakened Khan has Doctor [=McCoy=] by the throat: |
| 1397 | --->'''[=McCoy=]:''' Well, either choke me or cut my throat. [[GetItOverWith Make up your mind]].\ |
| 1398 | '''Khan:''' English. I thought I dreamed hearing it. Where am I?\ |
| 1399 | '''[=McCoy=]:''' You're in bed, [[DeadpanSnarker holding a knife at your doctor's throat]]. |
| 1400 | ** ''Series/StarTrekTheNextGeneration'': |
| 1401 | *** In "[[Recap/StarTrekTheNextGenerationS1E16WhenTheBoughBreaks When the Bough Breaks]]", Wesley talks to the Custodian (a computer), after having been told he's allowed to ask of it any question: |
| 1402 | ---->'''Wesley:''' Custodian, can you show me where Harry is?\ |
| 1403 | '''The Custodian:''' Yes.\ |
| 1404 | '''Wesley:''' Custodian, ''show'' me Harry. |
| 1405 | *** In "[[Recap/StarTrekTheNextGenerationS7E10Parallels Parallels]]", the ''Enterprise'' crew throws Worf a surprise party for his birthday. Picard asks Worf how old he is, to which Worf simply says "[[AgelessBirthdayEpisode Old enough]]." |
| 1406 | ** ''Series/StarTrekDeepSpaceNine'': |
| 1407 | *** In "[[Recap/StarTrekDeepSpaceNineS01E17TheForsaken The Forsaken]]", Odo is asked by Lwaxana Troi if Odo is his first or last name. [[OnlyOneName Yes, it is]]. |
| 1408 | *** In a later episode, "[[Recap/StarTrekDeepSpaceNineS03E14HeartOfStone Heart of Stone]]", we get to know that Odo is his first name. His second is Ital. (The Cardassian word ''Odo'ital'' means "Unknown Sample", which is [[ExactlyWhatItSaysOnTheTin exactly what he was]] to the scientists who discovered him.) Well, he ''was'' named on Bajor, where the Eastern name order is accepted, so it's still Mathematician's. |
| 1409 | ** ''Series/StarTrekEnterprise'': In "[[Recap/StarTrekEnterpriseS01E10FortunateSon Fortunate Son]]", while the crew is helping to repair a cargo ship: |
| 1410 | --->'''Boy playing hide-and-seek:''' Have you seen Nadine?\ |
| 1411 | '''T'Pol:''' I'm sorry. I don't know which child is named "Nadine". |
| 1412 | * ''Series/TheSuiteLifeOfZackAndCody'': [[AsianAirhead London Tipton]] gets bonus points for this gem: |
| 1413 | -->'''Cody:''' London! What's twelve times twelve?\ |
| 1414 | '''London:''' [beat] A math question? |
| 1415 | * ''Series/SuperhumanSamuraiSyberSquad'': In one episode, the heroes were playing with a game that told people's luck with basis on their dates of birth. Mrs. Starkey decided to try and asked Amp when he was born. Despite knowing about the game, he told the hour. When she explained she wanted to know the day, he said he was born on Wednesday. |
| 1416 | * ''Series/{{Supernatural}}'': |
| 1417 | ** Castiel irritates Dean with a couple mathematician's answers when they first meet and Dean is trying to figure out who or what Castiel is. Played with somewhat in that Castiel might believe his answers to be legitimately helpful, while the audience is well aware that he's just telling Dean superficial things he already knows while avoiding the deeper explanation Dean wants. |
| 1418 | --->'''Dean''': Who are you?\ |
| 1419 | '''Castiel''': I'm the one who gripped you tight and raised you from [[{{Hell}} perdition]].\ |
| 1420 | '''Dean''': Yeah.\ |
| 1421 | ''(a few moments later)''\ |
| 1422 | '''Dean''': Who are you?\ |
| 1423 | '''Castiel''': [[CaptainObvious Castiel]].[[note]] They just summoned him using his name. [[/note]]\ |
| 1424 | '''Dean''': Yeah, I figured that much, I mean ''[[WhatTheHellAreYou what]]'' are you? |
| 1425 | ** And from the episode "[[Recap/SupernaturalS08E08HunteriHeroici Hunteri Heroici]]": |
| 1426 | --->'''Dean''': Hey Cas, what's the word?\ |
| 1427 | '''Castiel''': It's a shortened version of my name. |
| 1428 | * In ''Series/TerminatorTheSarahConnorChronicles'', this is sometimes how [[RobotGirl Cameron]] responds to questions. |
| 1429 | * From ''Series/TerraNova'': |
| 1430 | -->'''Dr. Shannon''': Do you know where you are?\ |
| 1431 | '''Leah''': Under a table. |
| 1432 | * ''Series/That70sShow'' provides this example when 2 state troopers arrive at the Foreman house during a party: |
| 1433 | -->'''State Trooper:''' Ma'am, are you the owner of this house?\ |
| 1434 | '''Midge:''' No, I'm not.\ |
| 1435 | '''State Trooper:''' Do you know the owners?\ |
| 1436 | '''Midge:''' Yes, I do!\ |
| 1437 | ''({{beat}})''\ |
| 1438 | '''State Trooper:''' Could you ''get them'', please!? |
| 1439 | ** Showing that the trooper is a bit slow, or he would've realized that Midge can answer, "Yes, I could." |
| 1440 | * In ''Series/TheThundermans'' episode "Change of Art", Nora is trying to keep her mother from knowing where her siblings are: |
| 1441 | -->'''Barb:''' Where's Max?\ |
| 1442 | '''Nora''': With Phoebe.\ |
| 1443 | '''Barb''': Where's Phoebe?\ |
| 1444 | '''Nora''': With Billy.\ |
| 1445 | '''Barb''': Where's Billy?\ |
| 1446 | '''Nora''': Hey look, they're starting. |
| 1447 | * On an episode of ''Series/TwoAndAHalfMen'' Jake had a test where he wrote that UsefulNotes/AbrahamLincoln signed the Emancipation Proclamation in... pen. |
| 1448 | * ''Series/UnderTheUmbrellaTree'' devoted an episode to the characters telling jokes, including: |
| 1449 | -->'''Gloria:''' How did you find the weather on your vacation?\ |
| 1450 | '''Jacob:''' I just went outside, and there it was! |
| 1451 | * Given a serious purpose in an episode of ''Series/TheWestWing'', when White House counsel Oliver Babish is preparing C.J. to testify before Congress: |
| 1452 | -->'''Babish:''' Do you know what time it is?\ |
| 1453 | '''C.J.:''' It's five past noon.\ |
| 1454 | '''Babish:''' I'd like you to get out of the habit of doing that.\ |
| 1455 | '''C.J.:''' Doing what?\ |
| 1456 | '''Babish:''' Answering more than was asked... Do you know what time it is?\ |
| 1457 | ''(C.J. stares at him silently for several moments)''\ |
| 1458 | '''C.J.:''' Yes. |
| 1459 | ** Though also played for laughs when Will is attempting to obfuscate an angry Assistant Secretary of State: |
| 1460 | --->'''Assistant Secretary of State:''' Are you rewriting the foreign policy section?\ |
| 1461 | '''Will:''' Yes.\ |
| 1462 | '''Assistant Secretary of State:''' Dramatically?\ |
| 1463 | '''Will:''' I like to think I have a certain flair... |
| 1464 | ** Done twice in the pilot, both times played for laughs. First, when Leo is looking for Josh and goes to Donna, who's sitting at her desk: |
| 1465 | --->'''Leo:''' Is [Josh] there?\ |
| 1466 | '''Donna:''' Yes.\ |
| 1467 | ({{Beat}})\ |
| 1468 | '''Leo:''' Could you get him?\ |
| 1469 | '''Donna:''' ''(yelling towards Josh's office)'' Josh!\ |
| 1470 | '''Leo:''' [[SarcasmMode Thanks]]. |
| 1471 | ** And then a bit later, between Leo and Mrs. Landingham, when they're talking about the President's bike accident: |
| 1472 | --->'''Mrs. Landingham:''' Have they done an X-ray?\ |
| 1473 | '''Leo:''' Yep.\ |
| 1474 | '''Mrs. Landingham:''' Is anything broken?\ |
| 1475 | '''Leo:''' A $4000 Lynex Titanium touring bike that I swore I'd never lend anyone. |
| 1476 | * On ''Series/WhatsMyLine'', since contestants were supposed to answer only "yes" or "no", the correct response to a question like "Are you involved in television or movies?" would be "yes". More than one contestant over the course of the run forgot this, and answered the question the usual way, to the panel's benefit. And more than once, one of the more comedic-minded panelists would ask something like "Well, which is it?" when the contestant ''did'' answer in the correct manner. |
| 1477 | * ''Series/WolfHall'': Played for drama when Thomas Cromwell recalls serving Thomas More as a boy and asking him what he was reading. More only replied, "Words." More's casual dismissal of Cromwell was just one of many times More treated Cromwell as BeneathNotice, and Cromwell has never forgotten. |
| 1478 | * This tactic is occasionally used by contestants on ''Series/WouldILieToYou'' when they're trying to stall for time. Creator/LeeMack is notable for using this even when he's telling the truth: |
| 1479 | -->'''Lee''': I have hidden in a cupboard to escape Anthea Turner.\ |
| 1480 | '''David''': Where were you when this happened?\ |
| 1481 | '''Lee''': In the cupboard.\ |
| 1482 | '''David''': Where was the cupboard?\ |
| 1483 | '''Lee''': In the room I was hiding from Anthea Turner.\ |
| 1484 | '''David''': Where was the room?\ |
| 1485 | '''Lee''': Just away from Anthea Turner.\ |
| 1486 | '''David''': What was the occasion? And do ''not'' define the occasion or the geographical space in relation to Anthea Turner! What ''else'' was it? |
| 1487 | * ''Series/TheXFiles'': In the episode "[[Recap/TheXFilesS02E08OneBreath One Breath]]", Melissa Scully comes to visit Mulder at his apartment, where he is sitting in the dark hoping to surprise an intruder. |
| 1488 | -->'''Melissa:''' Why is it so dark in here?\ |
| 1489 | '''Mulder:''' Because the lights aren't on. |
| 1490 | * From ''Series/TheYoungOnes'': |
| 1491 | -->'''Rick''': Alright, what's the stair carpet doing on the fire?\ |
| 1492 | '''Vyvyan''': Burning! What's it look like?! |
| 1493 | ** Also: |
| 1494 | --->'''Neil''': ''(answering the phone)'' Someone's asking if we know the name of a short fat comedian.\ |
| 1495 | '''Mike''': Yes.\ |
| 1496 | '''Neil''': ''(into the phone)'' Yes we do! ''(hangs up)'' |
| 1497 | ** Another: |
| 1498 | --->'''Vyvyan''': 11:05 and it's still raining. I wonder how hard it is.\ |
| 1499 | '''Rick''': Not very hard, seeing as it's only made of water. |
| 1500 | ** Mike walks in holding a fish. He asks "What is this!?" Everyone else replies, "A FISH!" He realizes they are right and leaves. Later in the episode he comes back with the fish, having figured out what he meant to ask. He asks, "What is this fish doing in my bed!?" Someone points out to him it is not in his bed, he is holding it in his hands. He realizes they are right and leaves. Still later, he comes back, sure he has figured it out for good, with NOTHING in his hands. He says, "What is this fish doing in my bed!?" Everyone says, "WHAT FISH?" |
| 1501 | ** Still another: |
| 1502 | --->'''Girl''': Oh, is that the time?\ |
| 1503 | '''Mike''': No, that's a wristwatch. Time is abstract concept. |
| 1504 | [[/folder]] |
| 1505 | |
| 1506 | [[folder:Music]] |
| 1507 | * When asked what his songs were about, Music/BobDylan responded, "Some are about three minutes, some are about four minutes..." |
| 1508 | * Music/ElvisCostello, ''Brutal Youth'', "My Science Fiction Twin": |
| 1509 | -->"They ask, 'How in the world he does all these things,'/ and he answers, 'Superbly'" |
| 1510 | * Jez Lowe has an example in his song "High Part of the Town": |
| 1511 | -->They tried to teach geography, but I found it much too hard/When they asked me where does coal come from, I answered "next door's yard" |
| 1512 | * When asked whether she was a singer of country, pop, blues, or jazz, Crystal Gayle replied, "Yes." |
| 1513 | * "Daddy Wouldn't Buy Me a Bow Wow", a [[{{Vaudeville}} music hall]] number by Joseph Tabrar. The title is the singer's answer when her teacher asks her why she brings her cat to school. |
| 1514 | [[/folder]] |
| 1515 | |
| 1516 | [[folder:Tabletop Games]] |
| 1517 | * ''TabletopGame/InNomine'': The Seraphim are masters of this, since they are angels of truth who are forbidden to lie. Technically true answers keep them from the edge -- if sometimes just barely. |
| 1518 | [[/folder]] |
| 1519 | |
| 1520 | [[folder:Theatre]] |
| 1521 | * In ''Theatre/SeventeenSeventySix'', when John Hancock asks about the absent New Jersey delegates: |
| 1522 | -->'''John Hancock''': I'm concerned over the continued absence of 1/13th of this Congress. Where is New Jersey?\ |
| 1523 | '''John Dickinson''': Somewhere between New York and Pennsylvania. |
| 1524 | * In ''Theatre/{{Chicago}}'': |
| 1525 | --> She'd say, "What's your sister like?" I'd say, "men." |
| 1526 | * In ''Theatre/{{Hamlet}}'': Polonius attempts to get some information on Hamlet to report back to the king, but not wanting to betray his regicidal scheme and not wasting an opportunity to bother his girlfriend's intrusive father, Hamlet gives the most obvious and unhelpful answers he can. |
| 1527 | -->'''Polonius:''' What are you reading?\ |
| 1528 | '''Hamlet:''' Words, words, words. |
| 1529 | * In ''Theatre/ThePiratesOfPenzance'', the [[ModernMajorGeneral Major-General]] wants to find out something about the men in piratical outfits who propose to marry his daughters: |
| 1530 | --> '''Major General''': May I ask – this is a picturesque uniform, but I'm not familiar with it. What are you?\ |
| 1531 | '''Pirate King''': We are all... single gentlemen. |
| 1532 | ** This is also an ironic inversion of the trope, as the answer uses the ambiguities of language to provide the information he wants ([[spoiler:that the pirates are in fact all eligible bachelors in good standing, being actually English ''gentlemen'']]) while appearing not to. |
| 1533 | * In ''Theatre/{{Iolanthe}}'', when Strephon is required to prove that the title character [[OlderThanTheyLook is really his mother]], he points out she gave birth to him and raised him from childhood, and therefore she must be his mother. |
| 1534 | * ''Theatre/TheBestLittleWhorehouseInTexas:'' In one line that's in the musical but not the film, a reporter asks the governor what is behind rising unemployment numbers. The governor replies that the cause of unemployment is that so many people are out of work, then changes the subject. |
| 1535 | * Used multiple times in ''Theatre/TwelfthNight''. |
| 1536 | ** When Malvolio tells Olivia that a man wants to see her and will not be turned away: |
| 1537 | -->'''Olivia''': What kind of man is he?\ |
| 1538 | '''Malvolio''': Why, of mankind.\ |
| 1539 | '''Olivia''': What ''manner'' of man?\ |
| 1540 | '''Malvolio''': Of very ill-manner. |
| 1541 | ** Also, when Viola meets Feste: |
| 1542 | --->'''Viola''': Save thee, friend, and thy music: dost thou live by thy tabour?\ |
| 1543 | '''Feste''': No, sir, I live by the church.\ |
| 1544 | '''Viola''': Art thou a churchman?\ |
| 1545 | '''Feste''': No such matter, sir: I do live by the church; for I do live at my house, and my house doth stand by the church. |
| 1546 | * ''Theatre/TheTamingOfTheShrew'' gives us this exchange concerning Petruchio: |
| 1547 | -->'''Babptista''': When will he be here?\ |
| 1548 | '''Biondello:''' When he stands where I am and sees you there. |
| 1549 | * Boyet does this to mess with the lovestruck Longaville in ''Theatre/LovesLaboursLost.'' When Longaville asks for the name of the lady he's infatuated with, Boyet says that he can't have it because she's still using it. Longaville then asks whose daughter she is. |
| 1550 | --> ''Boyet:'' Her mother's, I hear. |
| 1551 | [[/folder]] |
| 1552 | |
| 1553 | [[folder:Video Games]] |
| 1554 | * The PointAndClickGame based on ''WesternAnimation/ThePagemaster'' featured a RiddlingSphinx in the Fantasy World that blocked Richard's entrance to the final part of the game. The riddle was "What is the beginning of eternity, the end of time, and the start of every ending?" Richard answers with "The letter 'E'." |
| 1555 | * Props up a few times in the ''Franchise/MassEffect'' trilogy |
| 1556 | ** You have Alestia Iallis in the first game. |
| 1557 | ---> '''Shepard:''' Do you know Matriarch Benezia? \ |
| 1558 | '''Alestia:''' Do you know President Huerta of Earth? I thought not.\ |
| 1559 | '''Shepard:''' But, she is here. \ |
| 1560 | '''Alestia:''' I have seen her. You asked if I knew her. I do not.[[note]]She is actually lying through her teeth, as she is one of Benezia’s {{Mooks}} placed here undercover.[[/note]] |
| 1561 | ** ''VideoGame/MassEffect2'' has one character who gives these sort of answers almost by default: |
| 1562 | --->'''Shepard:''' You watch me or you watch organics?\ |
| 1563 | '''[[spoiler:Legion]]:''' Yes.\ |
| 1564 | '''Shepard:''' Which?\ |
| 1565 | '''[[spoiler:Legion]]:''' Both. |
| 1566 | ** Said character also has a nasty habit of providing massively important information under the verbal heading of "Addendum:", which is kind of a mathematician's answer in its own right; yes, it is indeed an additional piece of information that you did not have a moment ago. It's also frequently something you would, ideally, have liked to have known ''before'' you did what you just did... |
| 1567 | * In ''VideoGame/DiscworldNoir'', when Lewton asks the butler if he can see Count von Uberwald, the ServileSnarker responds that he is in no position to judge how good Lewton's eyesight is. |
| 1568 | * The ''Franchise/DragonAge'' series: |
| 1569 | ** Sten of ''VideoGame/DragonAgeOrigins'' loves to do this. |
| 1570 | ---> '''Warden:''' What were you doing in that cage?\ |
| 1571 | '''Sten:''' Sitting. |
| 1572 | ** In ''VideoGame/DragonAgeII'', a sidequest has Hawke go fetch some pickaxes for a group of miners from a smith in town whose name they forgot. |
| 1573 | --->'''Hawke:''' Are you the smith?\ |
| 1574 | '''Smith:''' I'm ''a'' Smith.\ |
| 1575 | '''Hawke:''' Is "Smith" your name or your profession?\ |
| 1576 | '''Smith:''' Yep. |
| 1577 | * ''VideoGame/ArcanumOfSteamworksAndMagickObscura'': When you try to get the location of the HiddenElfVillage Quintarra from Myrth the Elf. He repeatedly answers "In the Glimmering Forest" (said forest covers a third of Arcanum) and "In the trees" while being delighted at your frustration. When you give up, you turn it back on him: |
| 1578 | --> '''Myrth:''' "Why do you want to know, if you don't mind me asking?"\ |
| 1579 | '''You:''' "No, I don't mind at all that you're asking."\ |
| 1580 | '''Myrth:''' Well?\ |
| 1581 | '''You:''' ...\ |
| 1582 | '''Myrth:''' Aren't you going to answer?\ |
| 1583 | '''You:''' ...\ |
| 1584 | '''Myrth:''' Out with it, man/woman!\ |
| 1585 | '''You:''' I said I didn't mind you asking, not that I'd answer. |
| 1586 | * The [[VideoGame/PokemonRubyAndSapphire third generation]] ''Franchise/{{Pokemon}}'' games will let you answer yes or no... to the question of where your character came from. If you answer "yes," he'll reply that he's never heard of Yes Town. If you say no, he'll say that you have to have come from somewhere. |
| 1587 | * Same deal in ''VideoGame/EarthBound1994''. |
| 1588 | ** In the Japanese ''Mother 2'', someone asks you if you can name a cartoon, "Alps no Shoujo [=OOji=]." Answering "hai" [[Anime/HeidiGirlOfTheAlps is technically correct]]. If you reply "iie," they'll say that "Iieji" is just wrong. |
| 1589 | ** In the North American localization, this is translated into "a Beatles song - [=XXXterday=]. Can you fill in the blank?" Again, "yes" is correct, and you'll get scolded that "Noterday" is wrong if you answer "no." |
| 1590 | * ''VideoGame/{{Borderlands}}'' series: Mister Torgue: |
| 1591 | ** In ''VideoGame/Borderlands2: Mister Torgue's Campaign of Carnage'': |
| 1592 | *** Mister Torgue explains that the reason he's always disorganized and was unable to find a sponsor for the Vault Hunter was because he was "[[AmbiguousSyntax busy suplexing a shark wearing a bolo tie]]". He then notices that "You may ask, who was wearing the bolo tie, you or the shark?". Answer: '''YES'''. |
| 1593 | *** Torgue poses something of a Mathematicians' ''Question'' in the introduction to this campaign. "I have one question, and one question only: '''EXPLOSIONS?!'''" Under the circumstances, one could be led to believe that the valid answer is "Yes". |
| 1594 | ** A question asked on his Reddit: "WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE TYPE OF EXPLOSION?" Answer: '''YES'''. |
| 1595 | * The game ''VideoGame/StarControl 2'' has a race with a game called Frungy. One of the creators was asked how Frungy is played. "With gusto!" |
| 1596 | * In ''VideoGame/{{Bayonetta}}'', Bayonetta meets a little girl called Cereza. Bayonetta asks where she is from. She responds "I... I'm from my house". |
| 1597 | * In ''VideoGame/LegendOfMana'', one specific sidequest involves you convincing dropout students to go back to school. One of them thinks that AdultsAreUseless because they answer questions but never actually say anything useful. You have to convince him otherwise... except [[HeroicMime your character]] [[HypocriticalHumor can only say yes or no]]. |
| 1598 | * In ''VideoGame/TheLegendOfZeldaMajorasMask'', the Postman gives such responses to Anju when delivering a letter from her missing fiance Kafei (likely because the Postman is acting as a SecretKeeper for Kafei, who wants to lay low for the time being): |
| 1599 | --> '''Anju:''' This letter, wh-where did you?!?\ |
| 1600 | '''Postman:''' From the postbox.\ |
| 1601 | '''Anju:''' Th-that's not what I mean! From the postbox where?!?\ |
| 1602 | '''Postman:''' From the postbox somewhere. |
| 1603 | * The gender of Mangle from ''Videogame/FiveNightsAtFreddys2'' is one hotly debated by the fandom for well over a year. [[WordOfGod Scott Cawthon's]] answer on if Mangle is male or female? [[http://steamcommunity.com/app/388090/discussions/0/523897653300510719/#p1 Yes.]] |
| 1604 | * After an update, ''VideoGame/{{Undertale}}'''s Mad Dummy boss simply has its defense listed as "YES". |
| 1605 | * ''VideoGame/Tekken7'': In Eddie Gordo's story mode, he demands that Lucky Chloe tell him where Kazuya Mishima is. She hands him a piece of paper that has a drawing of the Earth on it and an arrow pointing at it that says "Here". [[{{Understatement}} Eddie isn't happy]], even moreso when he sees Chloe running the hell away at top speed. |
| 1606 | * In ''VideoGame/Persona5'', Futaba Sakura has a habit of this. |
| 1607 | ** When her father Sojiro is shocked to see her come into Leblanc and asks how she got there, Futaba says "I walked." Considering that the Sakura residence is in the same neighborhood as Leblanc and it would only take a few minutes to walk there, Futaba's answer isn't too misleading... until you consider that until recently, she was a shut-in who was largely unable to leave her room, let alone the house[[note]]That said, she was able to walk over to Leblanc to hand-deliver the calling card to the mailbox, but Sojiro doesn't know that[[/note]], which is why Sojiro is shocked to see her. |
| 1608 | ** In the official artbook, the female Phantom Thieves decline to mention how much they weigh. Futaba creatively sidesteps the question by saying that her weight is X, which is more than 0 kilograms and less than 1,000 kilograms (about 2,200 pounds). |
| 1609 | * ''VideoGame/LeisureSuitLarry6ShapeUpOrSlipOut'': When Larry asks Rose what brought her to America, she responds with "Airplane". |
| 1610 | * ''VideoGame/BoxxyQuestTheGatheringStorm'': At the beginning of the game it asks "Are you a boy or a girl?" '''' Yes/No''''' |
| 1611 | --->'''''Yes:''''' ...Er, which one?\ |
| 1612 | '''''No:''''' ...Gee, genders sure are hard. [Moves onto HelloInsertNameHere for player and some party members] |
| 1613 | * In ''VideoGame/ReturnoftheObraDinn'', the boat puller asks the Inspector (the player) how he's supposed to hoist up a heavy box onto the ship. The Inspector's response? "Carefully." |
| 1614 | * In ''VisualNovel/PhoenixWrightAceAttorneyTrialsAndTribulations'', client Ron [=DeLite=] didn't make your job any easier, as when he found the victim's body, his first reaction was to hide it in a safe whose code is only known to a few people, including him, making him look even more suspicious. When you ask him about it... |
| 1615 | -->'''Phoenix''': Why did you hide the body in the safe, anyway? |
| 1616 | -->'''Ron''': (Completely honestly) Because it wouldn't fit in a drawer. |
| 1617 | [[/folder]] |
| 1618 | |
| 1619 | [[folder:Web Animation]] |
| 1620 | * ''WebAnimation/IsabelleRuinsEverything'': During the protest, the Mayor asks, "Now, do you wanna tell me why everyone's acting like a bunch of animals?" Isabelle's answer is, "They ''are'' animals, sir." |
| 1621 | [[/folder]] |
| 1622 | |
| 1623 | [[folder:Web Comics]] |
| 1624 | * In [[http://ozyandmillie.org/2007/10/01/ozy-and-millie-1961/ this]] ''WebComic/OzyAndMillie'' strip, Millie gets one of these from her own subconscious. |
| 1625 | * Invoked by WordOfGod in response to this ''WebComic/{{Drowtales}}'' [[http://www.drowtales.com/mainarchive.php?sid=9162 page]]. When a reader asked if Kiel was referring to the flying daggers, or fire wielding dude when she said 'I want one of those', ''WebComic/{{Drowtales}}'' writer Kern stated the correct answer was [[http://forums.drowtales.com/viewtopic.php?p=750866#p750866 "Yes"]] |
| 1626 | * ''Webcomic/EdmundFinneysQuestToFindTheMeaningOfLife'' has [[http://eqcomics.com/2011/09/02/an-arrest/ this comic.]] |
| 1627 | * In ''Webcomic/TheOrderOfTheStick'', the Oracle's first [[http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0330.html answer]] to Roy's question "Where is Xykon?" was "In his throne room." Roy [[http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0329.html persuaded]] him to follow up with a more useful answer. |
| 1628 | ** When Belkar [[http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0331.html asked the oracle]] whether he would kill "Miko, Miko's stupid horse, Roy, Vaarsuvius, or you [the oracle]," the oracle replied "Yes." [[spoiler: It ended up being the Oracle himself, despite his best attempts to invoke ProphecyTwist by way of MetaphoricallyTrue.]] |
| 1629 | ** Vaarsuvius [[http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0749.html does this]] to Haley in another strip. Oddly, it works as a RhetoricalQuestionBlunder, but still means "yes, I'll help you". |
| 1630 | ** This is generally the sort of answer given when a question is asked about V's gender. |
| 1631 | ** When asked where Girard's Gate (the Artifact sealing [[NegativeSpaceWedgie Girard's Rift]]) is, a deliberately unhelpful (but compelled to tell the truth) mummy does this. It first answers "in the Desert", then, when asked for ulterior clarification, it says "around Girard's Rift" (which the protagonists and readers know already, since it's sealing it), and finally, when asked where Girard's Rift is, it goes: [[JokeOfTheButt "Between Girard's Buttcheeks."]] |
| 1632 | --->'''Elan:''' The tragic loss to the field of ass comedy diminishes us all. |
| 1633 | * On the ''Webcomic/GunnerkriggCourt'' forum, Tom Siddell gives this type of answer to the few questions [[ShrugOfGod he doesn't want to answer]]. |
| 1634 | -->'''Fan:''' What did the Court do with Sivo's body? ... Was Sivo laid to rest somewhere near the Court, or were his remains sent to an [[OurDragonsAreDifferent Orjak]] burial ground in the Bovec Mountains or elsewhere?\ |
| 1635 | '''[[http://gunnerkrigg.proboards.com/index.cgi?board=general&action=display&thread=40&page=12#3563 Tom Siddell]]:''' Eglamore dealt with the matter in the way agreed on between he and his friend.\ |
| 1636 | ...\ |
| 1637 | '''Fan:''' I like how most characters have slightly different skin colors. But because they do, I'm not sure what to make of Zimmy's ashen color. Do you consider it to be in the expected range of variation for Gunnerkrigg characters (it does seem like the Headmaster's is quite similar), or is it intended to suggest something like unhealthiness or unnaturalness or even just griminess?\ |
| 1638 | '''[[http://gunnerkrigg.proboards.com/index.cgi?board=general&action=display&thread=614&page=6#21831 Tom Siddell]]:''' Yup. |
| 1639 | * [[http://irregularwebcomic.net/1785.html This]] ''Webcomic/IrregularWebcomic'' strip. |
| 1640 | * [[http://somethingpositive.net/sp10112005.shtml Yeah]], ''Webcomic/SomethingPositive'' did it, too. |
| 1641 | -->"Davan, I'm going to force self-worth into you if I have to do it with a suppository."\ |
| 1642 | "Be gentle, it'll be my first time."\ |
| 1643 | "First time to be rectally violated or first time to feel good about yourself?"\ |
| 1644 | "Yes." |
| 1645 | ** And [[http://www.somethingpositive.net/sp02152009.shtml again]]. |
| 1646 | -->"I honestly, truly hate you."\ |
| 1647 | "Because I did that to your character, or because I thought to put it in a game before you?"\ |
| 1648 | "Yes." |
| 1649 | ** In the "Life according to S*P" comic in which [[http://www.somethingpositive.net/sp03032009.shtml Davan is horrified to realise]] he's been arguing about ''Film/StarTrek2009'' on the internet and used a [[WebOriginal/LOLCats LOLCat]], Randy's comment at the bottom of the strip is "If you're wondering if the argument or the [=LOLCat=] was stupid, the answer is yes." |
| 1650 | * The ''WebComic/FlakyPastry'' [[http://flakypastry.runningwithpencils.com/comic.php?strip_id=100 100th strip spectacular]] showed Nitrine giving a slightly more helpful Mathematician's Answer. |
| 1651 | * ''Webcomic/SluggyFreelance'': Kusari answers with one [[http://sluggy.com/comics/archives/daily/091216 here]]. |
| 1652 | -->'''Kusari''': Dr. Shankraft, you are in trouble. In a permanent sense. We can help.\ |
| 1653 | '''Dr. Shankraft''': Help me get "into" my permanent trouble, or "out" of it?\ |
| 1654 | '''Kusari''': Yes. |
| 1655 | * ''Able And Baker'' gives one of these [[http://www.jimburgessdesign.com/comics/index.php?comic=1239 here]]. |
| 1656 | -->"What's your honest opinion?"\ |
| 1657 | "The one thing I can never be wrong about." |
| 1658 | * [[http://www.terrorisland.net/strips/027.html This strip]] from the "spelling bee" arc in ''WebComic/TerrorIsland'': |
| 1659 | -->'''York''': Stephen, your word is "Camelopard."\ |
| 1660 | '''Stephen''': Can you use it in a sentence?\ |
| 1661 | '''York''': Almost certainly.\ |
| 1662 | '''Stephen''': Sorry, ''will'' you use it in a sentence?\ |
| 1663 | '''York''': Probably not. It isn't a very common word. |
| 1664 | * ''{{Webcomic/Xkcd}}'' gets one early on [[http://xkcd.com/13/ here:]] |
| 1665 | -->What time is it?\ |
| 1666 | Now.\ |
| 1667 | That's a pretty boring answer.\ |
| 1668 | Is not. It's the least boring answer imaginable. |
| 1669 | * From ''Webcomic/WapsiSquare'', Shelly gives one when asked where she [[http://wapsisquare.com/comic/onmyfront/ got her tattoo.]] |
| 1670 | * In ''Webcomic/EightBitTheater'', we have two examples: |
| 1671 | ** Having been [[ImpaledWithExtremePrejudice jumped on]] multiple times by both Red Mage and Dragoon, Black Mage gives us [[http://www.nuklearpower.com/2007/10/06/episode-903-awakenings/ this exchange:]] |
| 1672 | --->'''Thief:''' Since when do you care about quests?\ |
| 1673 | '''Black Mage:''' Since it's a convenient excuse to butcher Sir Hopsalot for revenge.\ |
| 1674 | '''Dragoon:''' You mean Red Mage or me?\ |
| 1675 | '''Black Mage: YES.''' |
| 1676 | ** Then, we have Red Mage's character sheet. [[http://www.nuklearpower.com/2009/11/14/episode-1191-redistribution-of-xp/ Religion: Okay]]. |
| 1677 | * ''Webcomic/TheTrenches'': |
| 1678 | -->'''Manager:''' Ever been arrested?\ |
| 1679 | '''Isaac:''' Once.\ |
| 1680 | '''Manager:''' What for?\ |
| 1681 | '''Isaac:''' Breaking the law. |
| 1682 | * In ''Webcomic/TalesOfTheQuestor'' Quentyn stumbles into his parent's kitchen to find Squidge, the bogey, sitting in the middle of a pie, snarfing it down doublehanded. |
| 1683 | -->'''Quentyn:''' Squidge, what are you doing here?\ |
| 1684 | '''Squidge:''' ''(looking around)'' Eatin' pie.\ |
| 1685 | '''Quentyn:''' No, I mean -- why are you in my mother's kitchen?\ |
| 1686 | '''Squidge:''' 'Cause that where pie ''is.'' |
| 1687 | * ''WebComic/CyanideAndHappiness'' loves these: |
| 1688 | -->'''Alien:''' Thank you for repairing my ship, human. You may ask me one question.\ |
| 1689 | '''Man:''' Can it be about anything?\ |
| 1690 | '''Alien:''' Yes. ''(disappears)'' |
| 1691 | ** and a variation |
| 1692 | -->'''Yellow Shirt''' What's wrong?\ |
| 1693 | '''Green Shirt''' My Uncle died of a heart attack.\ |
| 1694 | '''Yellow Shirt''' Jeez, I'm sorry, my heart goes out to your family.\ |
| 1695 | '''Green Shirt''' Really could've used that yesterday. |
| 1696 | ** and another one |
| 1697 | -->'''Cyan Shirt''' What are you reading?\ |
| 1698 | '''Green Shirt''' A book. |
| 1699 | * ''Webcomic/GuildedAge'': |
| 1700 | -->'''Gravedust''': How did you sleep last night?\ |
| 1701 | '''Frigg''': By puttin my head down on a pillow. |
| 1702 | * Subverted in one of the extra strips of ''{{Webcomic/Paranatural}}''. |
| 1703 | -->'''Max''': Mr. Starchman, can I go to the bathroom?\ |
| 1704 | '''Mr. Starchman''': CAN you go to the bathroom?\ |
| 1705 | '''Max''': Uh... may I go to the bathroom?\ |
| 1706 | '''Mr. Starchman''': MAY you go to the bathroom?\ |
| 1707 | ''[Cut to the classroom turned into a mess, the teacher screaming while ripping his shirt open and the kids kneeling on the floor with their hands on their heads.]''\ |
| 1708 | '''Max''': WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO SAY!? |
| 1709 | * In ''Webcomic/DumbingOfAge'', when Walky gives Dorothy flowers: |
| 1710 | -->'''Walky''': Do you like them or is this just kinda cheesy?\ |
| 1711 | '''Dorothy''': Yes. |
| 1712 | * ''Webcomic/FullFrontalNerdity'' has [[http://ffn.nodwick.com/?p=1256 this exchange]]: |
| 1713 | -->'''Frank:''' Lewis's character [will] become the random misfortune death-god.\ |
| 1714 | '''Shawn:''' Do you pray to him to ''get'' that kind of death or to ''avoid'' it?\ |
| 1715 | '''Lewis:''' Yes. |
| 1716 | * [[http://www.qwantz.com/index.php?comic=2113 This]] ''Webcomic/DinosaurComics'' strip has the following exchange: |
| 1717 | -->'''Dromiceiomimus:''' What's 11 divided by 34.1?\ |
| 1718 | '''T-Rex:''' Um... a number?\ |
| 1719 | '''Utahraptor: ''' Ah, the "not wrong but also not meaningfully correct" route!\ |
| 1720 | '''T-Rex: ''' It's technically correct!\ |
| 1721 | '''Utahraptor: ''' I believe you'll find someone who takes the risk of being wrong is preferred to someone who is never wrong but never says anything worth saying. |
| 1722 | * ''Webcomic/{{JL8}}'': |
| 1723 | -->'''[[Franchise/WonderWoman Diana]]:''' Wait, why are you giving [[Franchise/{{Batman}} Bruce]] flirty faces?\ |
| 1724 | '''[[ComicBook/PowerGirl Karen Starr]]:''' [[DeadpanSnarker Um, because]] I '''LIKE''' him. '''''[[BoldInflation DUH.]]'''''\ |
| 1725 | '''Diana:''' Because you like ''him'', or [[GoldDigger you like the fact]] that he owns '''[[AllGirlsLikePonies horses?]]'''\ |
| 1726 | ''({{beat}})''\ |
| 1727 | '''Karen:''' Yes. |
| 1728 | * ''Webcomic/{{Homestuck}}'': |
| 1729 | -->'''DAVE:''' you might want to get your ass in gear\ |
| 1730 | '''DAVE:''' shits going down on lofaf\ |
| 1731 | '''ROSE:''' Could you elaborate?\ |
| 1732 | ''(closeup on Dave's mouth)''\ |
| 1733 | '''DAVE:''' theres problems\ |
| 1734 | '''ROSE:''' Then let us bounce. |
| 1735 | * ''Webcomic/ChildrenOfEldair'': An exchange seen [[http://www.eldair.com/gallery.php?imgID=203 here]]. |
| 1736 | -->'''Indri''': I like a man who's good at what he does. \ |
| 1737 | '''Kian''': Being a cad? Or using my muscles for dubious purposes? \ |
| 1738 | '''Indri''': Yes. |
| 1739 | * From ''Webcomic/XWhy'', the math teachers employ a little [[http://xwhy.comicgenesis.com/d/20110518.html Coffee Logic.]] |
| 1740 | * Becomes the cause of an attack that causes the death of four people in a ''WebComic/StandStillStaySilent'' flashback. |
| 1741 | --> "It's the most recent scout report for the site of the attack. It's improperly filled out. And quite vague. The section for area details merely says 'Yes'". |
| 1742 | * ''Webcomic/NineteenNinetySomething'': It was heavily implied that the Duquesnes moved from California to Eden Prairie to keep the police from looking too hard at Kevin for the rape and murder of one of his sister Lindsay's high school rivals. Lindsay (privately) cops to sending Kevin after said rival, but just to scare her, maybe to rough her up a bit. When Lindsay asks Kevin directly if he responsible for the rape/murder, Kevin would simply say "I did what you asked me to." |
| 1743 | * ''Webcomic/CarryOn'': |
| 1744 | -->Kathy: Are these armor or corsets?\ |
| 1745 | Jade: Yes. |
| 1746 | * In ''WebComic/StrongFemaleProtagonist'', Alison, having [[JourneyToTheCenterOfTheMind just entered Patrick's mind]], encounters and rescues an aspect of his personality, and [[https://strongfemaleprotagonist.com/issue-7/page-41-6/ demands further information from it]] as to where exactly they are: |
| 1747 | -->'''Alison:''' I'm not going '''anywhere''' until I get some answers. First off, what is this place?\ |
| 1748 | '''"Patrick":''' A colonnade.\ |
| 1749 | '''Alison:''' You know what I mean.\ |
| 1750 | '''"Patrick":''' Patrick's mind.\ |
| 1751 | '''Alison:''' See, an explanation somewhere '''right in the middle''' of those two would really help me out, and I think you know that. |
| 1752 | [[/folder]] |
| 1753 | |
| 1754 | [[folder:Web Original]] |
| 1755 | * The Frequently Given Answers page makes a [[http://homepage.ntlworld.com/jonathan.deboynepollard/FGA/questions-with-yes-or-no-answers.html serious attempt]] to inform unsuspecting answer-seekers how to avoid this trope, when asking questions of places frequented mainly by the overly literal. |
| 1756 | * [[WebVideo/TheSpoonyExperiment Spoony's]] take on [[FanservicePack the changes to Yuna]] between ''VideoGame/FinalFantasyX'' and ''VideoGame/FinalFantasyX2''. |
| 1757 | -->'''Spoony:''' Quite a long way from the traditional kimono she wore before, and her previous characterization as a kind, demure, religious care-giver with a tragic fate. But is this huge change in outfit and characterization because of the radical cultural shift in Spira because of the exposure of Yevon as a maniacal, genocidal cult run by the undead bent on world domination... [[RuleOfSexy or just because Japanese perverts want to see some cleavage and her cute ass in boyshorts?]] Good question... The answer is "Yes". |
| 1758 | * ''WebVideo/DragonBallZAbridged'': |
| 1759 | -->'''Butarega:''' King Vegeta, I have urgent news!\ |
| 1760 | '''King Vegeta:''' Speak, Butarega.\ |
| 1761 | '''Butarega:''' Bardock has gone absolutely mad, Sire!\ |
| 1762 | '''Bardock:''' ''(off in the distance)'' FREEZA!!\ |
| 1763 | '''King Vegeta:''' What's all the commotion about?\ |
| 1764 | '''Butarega:''' He's been telling everyone that Freeza plans to destroy Vegeta!\ |
| 1765 | '''King Vegeta:''' Wait, my son, [[{{Egopolis}} the planet]], or me?\ |
| 1766 | '''Butarega:''' ...Yes.\ |
| 1767 | ''(Butarega is blasted by King Vegeta)''\ |
| 1768 | '''King Vegeta:''' [[OffingTheMouth Freakin' smartass]]. |
| 1769 | ** King Vegeta does it ''again'' in ''Broly - The Legendary Super Saiyan Abridged'' when Paragus begs him to try to spare Broly's life and he falls into the same trap Butarega did. |
| 1770 | * The main character of ''WebVideo/AskANinja'' loves to do this, especially during the "Omnibus" episodes. |
| 1771 | -->'''Question''': What is integral theory?\ |
| 1772 | '''Ninja''': Complicated.\ |
| 1773 | '''Question''': Of all the ninja skills in the world, which is the deadliest?\ |
| 1774 | '''Ninja''': The one that kills you. |
| 1775 | * In Episode 9 of WebVideo/RedLetterMedia's ''Best of the Worst'', the group's initial enjoyment of ''Film/TheAmazingBulk'', as Mike explains, is quickly extinguished by the question of whether the movie is a sincere attempt to make a visually stylized film in the vein of ''Film/SinCity'', an intentionally SoBadItsGood movie in an effort to rival the popularity of ''Film/{{Birdemic}}'' or ''Film/TheRoom2003'', or the straight {{mockbuster}} it appears to be. |
| 1776 | --> '''Jay''': The answer is yes.\ |
| 1777 | '''Mike''': Which one?\ |
| 1778 | '''Jay''': Mmhmm. |
| 1779 | * Geoff from Creator/AchievementHunter is fond of these, from time to time. For instance, in a heated game of Halo 4: |
| 1780 | --> '''Ray''': ''(after Geoff kills him)'' "What?!"\ |
| 1781 | '''Geoff''': "Uh, that was me killing you."\ |
| 1782 | '''Ray''': "Yeah, thanks, but with what?"\ |
| 1783 | '''Geoff''': "With a gun."\ |
| 1784 | '''Ray''': "Thanks man." |
| 1785 | * Website/NotAlwaysRight: |
| 1786 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/parts-laboring-the-obvious/18232 This]] exchange: |
| 1787 | --->'''Customer:''' I need a tire for a 2010 Honda Accord.\ |
| 1788 | '''Me:''' What do you have on there now?\ |
| 1789 | '''Customer:''' A flat tire. |
| 1790 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/at-least-this-customer-is-honest/38 This]] customer. |
| 1791 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/candid-camera-candid-answer/3721 This one too.]] What does your camera take? Pictures! |
| 1792 | * ''WebVideo/AskThatGuyWithTheGlasses'' sometimes gives these answers. |
| 1793 | -->'''Q''': Are there any "dead" celebrities that you think are actually still alive?\ |
| 1794 | '''A''': Yes. |
| 1795 | * During [[WebVideo/AtopTheFourthWall Linkara's]] "That Guy With The Hat" sketch (parodying ''WebVideo/AskThatGuyWithTheGlasses'' (mentioned above), "Can you tell me how to get back onto the freeway?" is answered "NO." |
| 1796 | * ''Literature/SkippysList'' offers the following. |
| 1797 | --> '''Skippy's Roommate:''' Is that a squid in our shower?\ |
| 1798 | '''Skippy:''' Yep.\ |
| 1799 | '''Skippy's Roommate:''' What's it doing in there?\ |
| 1800 | '''Skippy:''' Thawing.\ |
| 1801 | '''Skippy's Roommate:''' Goodnight. |
| 1802 | * ''WebVideo/UltraFastPony''. "Sister Angst" opens with Rarity's parents paying her house an unscheduled visit. At the episode's end, she finds they're still in her kitchen: |
| 1803 | -->'''Rarity:''' What are you two still doing here?\ |
| 1804 | '''Magnum:''' Sitting down?\ |
| 1805 | ''(beat)''\ |
| 1806 | '''Rarity:''' Get out of my house. |
| 1807 | * In ''Q&A With Matt #3'' by [[WebVideo/MatthewSantoro Matt Santoro]], Matt is asked by a fan where he gets his fancy shirts from, and he says the store. |
| 1808 | * Creator/TerryPratchett, explaining the ''Literature/JohnnyMaxwellTrilogy'' on [[UsefulNotes/{{Usenet}} alt.fan.pratchett]]: |
| 1809 | -->So: is what happens in the books real? Yes. Does it all happen in Johnny's head? Yes. Are the Dead a metaphor? Yes. Are they real? Yes. Not just waving, but particalling." |
| 1810 | * ''WebVideo/DontHugMeImScared'' has one of these in the fourth episode. When Collin asks the puppets where they live, Duck Guy answers "My house". |
| 1811 | * [[spoiler:Rogal Dorn]] from ''WebAnimation/IfTheEmperorHadATextToSpeechDevice'' runs on this trope. |
| 1812 | --->Emperor: [[AC:You carry knowledge about the history of your sons, the [[spoiler:Imperial Fists]], yes?]]\ |
| 1813 | [[spoiler:Dorn]]: Yes.\ |
| 1814 | Emperor: [[AC:Can you bring unto me this knowledge?]]\ |
| 1815 | [[spoiler:Dorn]]: Yes.\ |
| 1816 | Emperor: [[AC:...Can you do it now?]]\ |
| 1817 | [[spoiler:Dorn]]: Yes.\ |
| 1818 | Emperor: [[AC:...Fucking do it then.]] |
| 1819 | * ''WebAnimation/TheMostPopularGirlsInSchool'': In Episode 3: |
| 1820 | -->'''Shay:''' I heard that you're going around calling me a ''fucking liar!''\ |
| 1821 | '''Mackenzie:''' Where did you hear that?\ |
| 1822 | '''Shay:''' Uh, I don't know, like... thirty-five seconds ago?\ |
| 1823 | '''Mackenzie:''' I said "where", not "when", you idiot!\ |
| 1824 | '''Shay:''' Shut up! You know I'm partially deaf in my right ear after Matthew Derringer hit me in the head with that fucking hacky sack in the third grade! |
| 1825 | * ''WebVideo/GameGrumps'': While playing ''VideoGame/KirbysEpicYarn'', Dan claims his dad is the king of these. |
| 1826 | -->'''Danny:''' So do you want pizza or sushi for dinner?\ |
| 1827 | '''Avi:''' YES!\ |
| 1828 | '''Danny:''' Okay. Piz-sushi it is. |
| 1829 | * From ''WebVideo/ScottTheWoz'': |
| 1830 | ** He brought up the debate of whether ''VideoGame/MarioKart64'' had controls that stood the test of time or have aged poorly, then answered with a gavel hit and a "Yes". |
| 1831 | ** ''You're Not an RPG Guy'' has Jerry pulling out Scott's biodata written on a piece of paper. Said bio lists Scott's sex as "no." |
| 1832 | ** In ''Borderline Forever'', he responds to someone greeting "Morning!" to him by checking his watch, and exclaiming, "Correct." |
| 1833 | * This trope is sometimes featured in ''WebVideo/DumbLawyerQuotesIRLButInAceAttorney''. For example, one witness, when asked about the condition a body was in at the time of the autopsy, says, "He was dead." |
| 1834 | * ''WebAnimation/HazbinHotel'' has Angel Dust being chewed out by Vaggie for making a mockery of the message of Charlies' hotel when they were on live broadcast, leading to Angel Dust to tell Vaggie to calm down and promising to take the situation with the Happy Hotel seriously from that moment onwards. |
| 1835 | -->'''Angel Dust''': Alright, I'll try. Just don't get your taco in a twist, baby.\ |
| 1836 | '''Vaggie''': Was that you trying to be racist or sexist?\ |
| 1837 | '''Angel Dust''': Whatever pisses you off more. |
| 1838 | * ''WebVideo/JonTron'' |
| 1839 | ** He gives us this gem when he's watching ''Series/VRTroopers'' and the main characters are lamenting the BigBad tearing down a historical landmark to build a power plant: |
| 1840 | ---> '''Ryan:''' We can't just let Karl Ziktor destroy our old neighborhood, you guys!\ |
| 1841 | '''Kaitlyn:''' I know! I mean, what gives him the right to do this anyway?! \ |
| 1842 | '''[=JonTron=]''' Land ownership? Deed? There's gotta be some paperwork in there somewhere. |
| 1843 | ** And during ''The Devil and Father Amorth'' we get this: |
| 1844 | ---> '''Friedkin:''' He would allow me to film Christina's ninth exorcism on May 1st. But, with no crew, no lights, and only a small video camera, alone. I didn't know what to expect.\ |
| 1845 | '''Jon:''' Probably an exorcism. ({{Beat}}) But I'm just fucking riffing, though. |
| 1846 | * A query on an NBA final once asked what the teams needed to do to win. A guy replied "baskets". |
| 1847 | * ''WebAnimation/{{The Champions|2018}}'': In the 2021 knockout stage draw short, Erling Haaland is asked about said knockout stage: |
| 1848 | -->'''Producer:''' Are you excited for the next round?\ |
| 1849 | '''Haaland:''' Yes.\ |
| 1850 | '''Producer:''' What are you most excited about?\ |
| 1851 | '''Haaland:''' The next round.\ |
| 1852 | '''Producer:''' Can you just do one full sentence, please?\ |
| 1853 | '''Haaland:''' I'm excited for the next. \ |
| 1854 | '''Producer:''' You know what? F''[[[SoundEffectBleep bleep]]]''k it. Thank you. |
| 1855 | * WebVideo/{{Kitboga}} is a scambaiter popular on Website/{{Twitch}} and Website/YouTube. When the scammers ask a question such as "Are you using a desktop or a laptop?"," Kitboga likes to tick them off by replying with "yes." |
| 1856 | * In the ''WebAnimation/Supermarioglitchy4sSuperMario64Bloopers'' episode ''[[Recap/SMG4sMarioBloopersMarioHasABBQButHesNotInvited Mario Has a BBQ But He's Not Invited]]'', after having to replace the fruit at the BBQ with imitation fruit (due to the sentient watermelon Melony... [[{{Understatement}} taking issue]]), Bob poses the question: |
| 1857 | -->'''Bob:''' If- if this isn't made of fruit, what is it made of then?\ |
| 1858 | '''[=SMG4=]:''' ...Yes.\ |
| 1859 | ''[=SMG4=] looks around with an OhCrapSmile while the camera zooms in on his face with the imposter sting from'' VideoGame/AmongUs ''playing'' |
| 1860 | [[/folder]] |
| 1861 | |
| 1862 | [[folder:Western Animation]] |
| 1863 | * In the ''WesternAnimation/ThreeTwoOnePenguins'' episode "Trouble on Planet Wait-Your-Turn", when Jason asks where they're going, Kevin ponders briefly before answering "Up." |
| 1864 | * ''WesternAnimation/TheAmazingWorldOfGumball'' gives a subjective mathematician's answer. |
| 1865 | -->'''Street Sign:''' You are now approaching Elmore\ |
| 1866 | Population: Weird |
| 1867 | * ''WesternAnimation/AvatarTheLastAirbender'': In the GrandFinale, a conflicted Aang calls upon the spirits of his four most recent incarnation, Avatars Roku, Kyoshi, Kuruk and Yangchen, to advise him on whether he should kill Ozai. All of the Avatar spirits gave a Mathematician's Answer of one sort or another; Roku's advice is to "be decisive", Kyoshi said "only justice will bring peace", Kuruk said to "actively shape the fate of the world", and Yangchen said "do whatever it takes to protect the world". All of these apply equally accurately to either killing Ozai or any number of other options that might have been attempted, though Aang regards them as being implicit endorsements of killing. In the end, [[spoiler:a Lion Turtle taught him Energybending, which Aang used to strip Ozai of his Firebending and render him powerless, instead of killing him]]. |
| 1868 | * ''WesternAnimation/BatmanBeyond'': In "Golem", Terry is battling the [[HumongousMecha Golem]] when he sees it's being controlled by Willie Watt, who has developed [[{{Technopath}} technopathic]] abilities. |
| 1869 | -->'''Terry:''' How are you doing this?\ |
| 1870 | '''Willie:''' [[DrunkOnTheDarkSide With supreme satisfaction]]. |
| 1871 | * The ''WesternAnimation/BeavisAndButtHead'' episode "Customers Suck" has a customer in Burger World ask if the shakes are made from real milk and ice cream or shake mix. Beavis just says "Yeah." |
| 1872 | * In ''WesternAnimation/FostersHomeForImaginaryFriends''’ episode ''Dinner Is Swerved'', Mac and Bloo are lost in the Fosters mansion and bumps into resident JerkAss Duchess. They ask her if she could help them get downstairs, to which she answers “Yes”… and then proceeds to do nothing. When they call her out on it, she maliciously rubs the logic in. |
| 1873 | -->'''Duchess:''' You asked me if I ''could'', and I can. You didn’t ask me if I ''would'', and I won’t.” |
| 1874 | * ''WesternAnimation/BigHero6TheSeries'': In "[[Recap/BigHero6TheSeriesS2E17Hardlight Hardlight]]": |
| 1875 | -->'''Fred:''' So, are you just like, super pro-gravity or just anti-my idea? \ |
| 1876 | '''Roddy:''' Yes. ''[leaves]''\ |
| 1877 | '''Fred:''' Wait - [[LampshadeHanging yes to]] ''[[LampshadeHanging what?]]'' |
| 1878 | * In one episode of ''[[ComicStrip/{{Peanuts}} The Charlie Brown and Snoopy Show]]'', Charlie Brown regains consciousness on a sidewalk as two little kids watch. Charlie gets up and asks one of the kids, "Where am I?" One of the kids points to him and says, "Right there!" |
| 1879 | * ''WesternAnimation/DangerMouse'' gives us: |
| 1880 | -->'''Penfold:''' You mean, we're lost?!\ |
| 1881 | '''Danger Mouse:''' Nonsense, Penfold. If we were lost, we wouldn't know where we are. And ''we'' know we're ''here!'' Therefore, we can't be lost. |
| 1882 | -->'''Penfold:''' Oh! Thank goodness for that! |
| 1883 | * The titular ''WesternAnimation/{{Dilbert}}'' gives us this when he, Alice, and Wally are crawling through the air ducts and inexplicably find a dry-erase marker in the shaft: |
| 1884 | -->'''Alice:''' Why would someone leave a dry-erase marker here?\ |
| 1885 | '''Dilbert:''' Maybe it's empty.\ |
| 1886 | '''Alice:''' That answer is like... so stupid. |
| 1887 | * ''WesternAnimation/FamilyGuy'': |
| 1888 | ** An example by the mayor of Quahog, Adam West: |
| 1889 | --->'''Adam West''': Will you answer one question for me?\ |
| 1890 | '''Medium''': Yes.\ |
| 1891 | '''Adam West''': Thank you so much. |
| 1892 | ** West himself loves doing this: |
| 1893 | --->'''Tricia Takanawa:''' Mr. West, do you have any words for our viewers?\ |
| 1894 | '''Adam West:''' Box, toaster, aluminum, maple syrup... no, I take that one back. I'm gonna hold onto that one. |
| 1895 | ** He has it done to him in "E Peterbus Unum'': |
| 1896 | --->''[Peter is dancing in the park and generally causing a commotion.]''\ |
| 1897 | '''Adam West:''' What in God's name is he doing?!\ |
| 1898 | '''Cleveland:''' I believe it's called the Worm. |
| 1899 | ** In one episode, when filling out a hospital form, upon reaching "Sex", Peter wrote "No, thank you, I'm dead". |
| 1900 | * On an episode of ''WesternAnimation/GarfieldAndFriends'' in a ComicStrip/USAcres segment, Wade is being his usual cowardly self, this time about seeing a doctor. Orson tries to reassure him, but Roy can't miss an opportunity to have a laugh at his expense. |
| 1901 | -->'''Orson:''' What a minute. You're not a surgeon Roy.\ |
| 1902 | '''(Doctor) Roy:''' I operated on a man just yesterday.\ |
| 1903 | '''Orson:''' For what?\ |
| 1904 | '''Roy:''' For 900 dollars.\ |
| 1905 | '''Orson:''' No, no. What did the man have?\ |
| 1906 | '''Roy:''' 900 dollars.\ |
| 1907 | '''Orson:''' No, I mean what did you remove?!\ |
| 1908 | '''Roy:''' ''[playing with a ball and paddle]'' The 900 dollars.\ |
| 1909 | '''Orson:''' No! What was his complaint?!\ |
| 1910 | '''Orson and Roy:''' The 900 dollars.\ |
| 1911 | '''Orson:''' OK Roy, you carve. |
| 1912 | * ''WesternAnimation/TheGrimAdventuresOfBillyAndMandy'': |
| 1913 | ** Fred Fredburger once resolved a court case by saying "yes" to an either-or question, resulting in both parties winning. [[TheFool This was not on purpose]]. |
| 1914 | ** Another episode has Billy and Irwin [[ItMakesSenseInContext sucked into Cthulhu's world through a supernatural phone, leaving only their shoes behind]]. Mandy questions the latter part, with Grim giving a [[SurprisinglyRealisticOutcome realistic answer]] [[VoodooShark that still doesn't explain why they or the rest of their clothes could go in]]. |
| 1915 | --->'''Mandy:''' Why didn't their shoes go too?\ |
| 1916 | '''Grim:''' Shoes can't fit through the phone, silly, they're way too big! |
| 1917 | * In ''WesternAnimation/InfinityTrain'', after Tulip sees she's on the inside of a lengthy train filled with numerous rooms containing fascinating features along with One-One. |
| 1918 | -->'''Tulip:''' How does this door work? Are you like a real robot? Are there other people on here? Is this what trains are like?\ |
| 1919 | '''One-One:''' Yes!\ |
| 1920 | '''Tulip:''' Yes to what? Which?\ |
| 1921 | '''One-One:''' I dunno. |
| 1922 | * In ''WesternAnimation/TheLegendOfKorra'', Korra's cousin Eska has this exchange with Bolin shortly after they meet. |
| 1923 | -->'''Eska:''' You amuse me. I will make you mine.\ |
| 1924 | '''Bolin:''' You mean like a boyfriend or a slave?\ |
| 1925 | '''Eska:''' Yes. Now win me prizes. |
| 1926 | * Used to answer an actual math question in an episode of ''Literature/LittleBear'' when Little Bear and Emily rope the 4 local {{Playful Otter}}s into playing school with them. After trying to teach them how to count, Emily asks the otters how many of them there are. They each answer "1" -- because "each of us is 1 otter!" There's a beat before Little Bear admits, "That's true..." |
| 1927 | * ''WesternAnimation/MyLittlePonyFriendshipIsMagic'': In "[[Recap/MyLittlePonyFriendshipIsMagicS4E18MaudPie Maud Pie]]", after Maud throws a rock miles away with enough force to make a tidal wave. |
| 1928 | -->'''Rainbow Dash:''' Woah! How'd you do that?\ |
| 1929 | '''Maud:''' I threw it. |
| 1930 | * Fred the squirrel from ''WesternAnimation/ThePenguinsOfMadagascar'', being LiteralMinded incarnate, has a bit of a problem with this. If he's asked if he can read something, he'll say "yes". If someone asks him to show them the town, he'll just point to the nearest buildings. |
| 1931 | * ''WesternAnimation/PhineasAndFerb'': |
| 1932 | ** Co-creator Dan Povenmire was asked by a fan on Twitter "What is Ferb short for?" He [[https://twitter.com/DanPovenmire/status/398613075290378240 responded]], "Brevity's sake." |
| 1933 | ** Another episode has Candace giving this kind of answer when [[LoonyFan Irving]] stops by: |
| 1934 | --->''[Irving knocks on the door]''\ |
| 1935 | '''Irving:''' Can I see [Phineas and Ferb]?\ |
| 1936 | '''Candace:''' Probably not from there. ''[closes the door]'' |
| 1937 | ** "Crack That Whip": |
| 1938 | --->'''Phineas:''' ''[as an announcer]'' Hello, everyone, and welcome to today's main event. The "anything goes" grudge race of the century between Grandma Betty Jo and Grandma Hildegard. I'm Phineas Flynn, and I'll be your announcer for today's action, along with our color commentator, Grandpa Clyde! |
| 1939 | --->'''Clyde:''' Yellow, green, blue!\ |
| 1940 | '''Phineas:''' Excellent color, Grandpa. |
| 1941 | * From ''WesternAnimation/TheRealGhostbusters'', the episode ''[[http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0809025/ No One Comes To Lupusville]]'': |
| 1942 | -->'''Lita:''' ''[offering Egon a turnip]'' Turnip?\ |
| 1943 | '''Egon:''' Yes, it is. |
| 1944 | * In one episode of ''WesternAnimation/{{Recess}}'', there is the following exchange: |
| 1945 | -->'''T.J.:''' Mr. Mayor, can I say something?\ |
| 1946 | '''Mayor Fitzhugh:''' I don't know, can you?\ |
| 1947 | '''T.J.:''' ''[looking annoyed]'' Sorry, sir. ''May'' I say something? |
| 1948 | * ''WesternAnimation/RockyAndBullwinkle'' provides us with another example. Boris, in one of his {{Paper Thin Disguise}}s, needs Bullwinkle to go to a particular location. His scheme is to have Bullwinkle win a trip in a contest. The trick, then, is to get the [[TheDitz exceedingly dense]] Bullwinkle to actually give the correct answer to a question, which he finally accomplishes with this exchange. |
| 1949 | -->'''Boris:''' Do you know who is buried in Grant's tomb?\ |
| 1950 | '''Bullwinkle:''' No.\ |
| 1951 | '''Boris:''' That's right, you don't! |
| 1952 | * ''WesternAnimation/TheSimpsons'': |
| 1953 | ** A variation on the theme, but still very much holds the original idea: In "Homer's Enemy", when Bart and Milhouse get their own warehouse, Milhouse is left behind as a night watchman. Bart comes back the next day to find the place destroyed. |
| 1954 | --->'''Bart:''' Milhouse, how could you let this happen? You were supposed to be the night watchman!\ |
| 1955 | '''Milhouse:''' I was watching. I saw the whole thing. First it started falling over, then it fell over. |
| 1956 | ** Homer managed one of these accidentally in "Burns Verkaufen Der Kraftwerk": |
| 1957 | --->'''Horst:''' You've been safety inspector for three years. What initiatives have you spearheaded in that time?\ |
| 1958 | '''Homer:''' Uh... all of them?\ |
| 1959 | '''Fritz:''' You must have lots of ideas for the future?\ |
| 1960 | '''Homer:''' I sure do! |
| 1961 | * In the ''WesternAnimation/SpongeBobSquarePants'' episode "Culture Shock", [=SpongeBob=] asks Squidward which brand of soap he should use: Mr. Cleanser or [[BlandNameProduct Dr. Clean]]? Squidward's response: "Yes." |
| 1962 | * In ''[[WesternAnimation/TotalDrama Total Drama World Tour]]'' while lost in a desert in Egypt: |
| 1963 | -->'''Heather:''' Does anyone know where we are?\ |
| 1964 | '''[[{{Cloudcuckoolander}} Izzy:]]''' Planet Earth, silly. |
| 1965 | * ''WesternAnimation/TwiceUponATime'': Ralph asks the Garbagerie computer how far to take the garbage. It replies, "Far away", then "Far, ''far'' away" then [[NonAnswer "You'll know when you get there."]] |
| 1966 | * During the Q&A episode of ''[[WesternAnimation/VillainousCartoonNetwork Villainous]]'', Flug gets the question of how did he and Demencia arrive at the Black Hat Organization. |
| 1967 | -->'''Dr. Flug:''' Easy. I arrived by plane, and Dementia arrived barefoot. |
| 1968 | * ''WesternAnimation/XMenTheAnimatedSeries'' makes its very first exposure to ComicBook/{{Gambit}}, right after he throws one of his exploding cards: |
| 1969 | -->'''Jubilee:''' How did you DO that?\ |
| 1970 | '''Gambit:''' With style, petite, with style. |
| 1971 | [[/folder]] |
| 1972 | |
| 1973 | [[folder:Other]] |
| 1974 | * Dictionaries and encyclopedias tend to do this if you look up the wrong form of the word you're hoping to define. |
| 1975 | -->'''Disappropriation''': ''n''. The act of disappropriating.\ |
| 1976 | '''Bohemian''': ''adj''. Of or relating to Bohemia. |
| 1977 | |
| 1978 | * Once when somebody asked James Randi how he had pulled off a trick, he answered "Very well, I think". |
| 1979 | * From an old Creator/MarvelComics trading card: |
| 1980 | --> '''Spider-Man''': So your name is Logan. Is that your first or last name?\ |
| 1981 | '''ComicBook/{{Wolverine}}''': Yup. |
| 1982 | ** At the time, Wolverine's real name had yet to be revealed. He sometimes went by "Logan L. Logan", with the "L." being yet ''another'' Logan. |
| 1983 | * Zen UsefulNotes/{{Buddhism}} has a {{koan}} like this. A monk asked Zhàozhōu, "Does a dog have Buddha nature or not?" Zhàozhōu said, "Wú." This is a rare example in which the mathematician's answer is actually the most useful one. Wú essentially means "null" or "not applicable" (or in [[JustForFun/TVTropesWillRuinYourVocabulary troper speak]], saying that the question is like asking WhenIsPurple) The point is that the monk asking the question is wrong to assume that the two dichotomous categories have any meaning. Wú is also [[{{Pun}} the sound a dog makes.]] |
| 1984 | * The Creator/EddieIzzard example so beloved of this page: |
| 1985 | --> '''Paris:''' Dad, found [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Helen_of_Troy this woman]]!\ |
| 1986 | '''Priam:''' Whoa, where's she from?\ |
| 1987 | '''Paris:''' She's from Sparta!\ |
| 1988 | '''Priam:''' ...Agh, you twit. Nip upstairs, see if there are any ships on the horizon.\ |
| 1989 | '''Paris:''' Right. [''he does''] Uhh... Ships. Yeah, yeah, there's ships.\ |
| 1990 | '''Priam:''' Well, how many?\ |
| 1991 | '''Paris:''' *thinking noises* ...{{all of them}}. |
| 1992 | * The proper way to choose a cantaloupe has been described as: smell it, and if it smells like a cantaloupe, it is ripe enough. But it ''is'' a cantaloupe, so by definition, whatever it smells like, is what a cantaloupe smells like. Therefore, the only logical answer to "Does it smell like a cantaloupe?" is "Yes". |
| 1993 | * Creator/RobinWilliams in his stand-up act when talking about calling tech support. When finally reaching a real person (who is [[OperatorFromIndia Indian]]), this exchange takes place: |
| 1994 | -->'''Caller:''' (''overjoyed'') Where are you!?\ |
| 1995 | '''Tech support assistant:''' (''heavy Indian accent'') I am on the phone with you. |
| 1996 | * Back in about 2003, when Mark & Lard were still doing an afternoon show on BBC Radio 1, they used to run a phone-in quiz vaguely about music. Once, one of the questions was, "Can you name a member of Boyzone?" One of the callers jumped in with, "No." Technically, it was a correct answer... |
| 1997 | * Dara Ó Briain did a bit about this in one of his stand-up shows, when the audience response to the question "Do you know what Moore's Law is?" was 'yes'. |
| 1998 | * There is a story about actress Creator/MaeWest, who was famous for playing TheVamp. |
| 1999 | -->'''Interviewer''': Do you like your men short, tall, fat, or thin?\ |
| 2000 | '''Mae West''': [[ReallyGetsAround Yes]]. |
| 2001 | * Then there's the old retort to "Can I ask you a question?" "You just did." |
| 2002 | ** If someone is fond of being a smartass with this one, try asking them "May I ask you another question after this one?" |
| 2003 | ** During the trial arc of ''Webcomic/SchlockMercenary'', the company lawyer manages, through convoluted wordplay, to ask if [[http://www.schlockmercenary.com/2006-07-16 he can ask a question without, in fact, asking a question]]. Petey, duly impressed with this feat, allows it: |
| 2004 | ---> '''Massey:''' Our defense in this case depends, therefore, entirely on Fleetmind law, of which we are all completely ignorant. Your Honor, before I can proceed, I need to ask you a question. |
| 2005 | ** Some people ask if they can ask a question by stating 'question'. A smartass (or [[LiteralMinded literalist]]) will then respond 'answer'. |
| 2006 | * The "A or B? Yes" joke works in most languages because it's rather typical that only one word is used for both meanings of "or". It doesn't work in languages where there are separate words for them, for example Finnish ("tai" / "vai". The former means "or" as in "is it either A or B?" and the latter as in "which one is it: A or B?") In fact, Finnish also has a third word for "or": "eli" meaning specifically "also known as" or "in other words". One wonders if the early Finns just really hated the "or" jokes. |
| 2007 | ** It's also difficult in [[UsefulNotes/ChineseLanguage Mandarin]], but for a completely different reason: Chinese does not have all-purpose words for "yes" and "no" (although 是 "is" and 不是 "is not" are now used to serve the purpose), instead attaching positive or negative modifiers to the verb in question. If someone asks you even a single-mode question, like "Have you eaten" (吃 饭 了 "chī fàn le?"), you have to say, 还 没 吃 "Méi chī le" (have not eaten) or "chī le" (already ate). ...Okay, people will still throw around 不 "bù" without an attached verb, same as how English speakers will say "Went to the store" with only an implied subject, but it's still a bit harder to be ambiguous. |
| 2008 | ** This also applies to Irish. Continuing the example, one would answer the question "Ar ith tú?" (did you eat?) with "D'ith mé" (I ate) or "Níor ith mé" (I did not eat). Though, for practical purposes, the positive and negative modifiers in the continuous present tense of the verb to be ("bí") often serve the role of yes and no ("tá" or "sea" and "níl" or "ní hea" respectively). [[labelnote:Pronunciation Note]]"Taw" (rhymes with how an American says "law"), "sha" (rhymes with "cat"), "kneel", "knee ha" (rhymes with "cat").[[/labelnote]]. |
| 2009 | ** The Indonesian language makes the standard mathematician's answer to "A or B?" a valid answer: If asked between A or B, saying yes implies agreeing to the latter, since it is said last. Most people will attempt to reconfirm afterwards, but those particularly mean-spirited/in the mood for pranks wouldn't, and will stick to their guns when asked about it. |
| 2010 | ** In UsefulNotes/{{Japanese|Language}}, as in English, the word for "yes" (はい "hai") can mean either "Yes." as in "Affirmative" or "Yes?" as in "Go on, I'm listening...". People doing business in Japan are regularly alerted to pay close attention to the context to avoid misunderstandings, since they won't always get a direct "no" to a proposition. |
| 2011 | *** Further, most requests made in Japanese are asked in the negative to avoid there ever being a "no" response. A person is more likely to ask by suggesting "You're probably too busy to do this..." in which case a "yes" would be a clear, concise response, and what would be a "no" generally prompts elaboration. That said, replying just with "no" could produce the results of this trope as the speaker hasn't actually agreed to anything... |
| 2012 | * This is the reason some computer languages have the XOR keyword. "OR" evaluates to "true" if ''at least one'' of a set of options is true; "XOR" requires that ''exactly'' one be true. |
| 2013 | ** In formal logic this is generally referred to as having an or (exclusive) and or (inclusive) operator. Most forms of symbolic logic shorthand have both, written longhand the former is usually constructed as "either... or..." and the latter as "... and/or ...". If the phrase is just written "or" the assumption is usually inclusive, though in less formal English obviously it's more context-sensitive. |
| 2014 | ** Interestingly enough, this can still lead to a Mathematician's Answer. '''Q:''' "Is it black XOR white?" '''Yes:''' it's either one or the other. '''No:''' it's either both or neither. |
| 2015 | ** Nick Hudson, in ''Modern Australian Usage'' under "or" reports: |
| 2016 | --> ...in the early days of flying between Melbourne and Sydney, passengers were asked "Tea or coffee?" twice. (1) The first time, the correct answer was "Yes" (which got you the cup) or "No." (2) The second time, the answer was "Coffee" or "Tea" (which got the cup filled). (3) If you were then asked whether you wanted to visit the "flight deck or cockpit" the answer was again yes or no, because no other choice was being offered; they were simply two terms for the same part of the aircraft. |
| 2017 | * In most computer languages the truth value of each proposition is evaluated one at time, left to right. As soon as a true result is found the processor jumps to the next instruction in the true branch without testing any of the subsequent terms, a process known as "lazy evaluation". A common programming pattern is to put the computationally cheap evaluations first in the chain. For example, given A or B when A is a cached value and B is a value the CPU will have to fetch over the Internet to determine if it is true or false. Checking A first makes a lot of sense here since if it's true a lot of time can be saved waiting for the check on B. |
| 2018 | * You've probably met the occasional smartass who thought they were funny by using these. "What's for lunch?" "Food." |
| 2019 | * Teachers see a '''lot''' of these, from students who can't come up with a relevant answer to a test question and opt to try for a laugh instead. Another common classroom example is "How did you find the exam?" "It was on the desk when I got there." |
| 2020 | * One that gets used a bit in direction-giving customer service roles: |
| 2021 | --> "Where's the men's room?"\ |
| 2022 | "Right next to the women's room." |
| 2023 | * Several ''Burt And I'' routines took this form. |
| 2024 | ** "Why you so head-up, Tom?" "Oh, I had to shoot my dog." "Oh, was he mad?" "Guess he weren't too damn pleased." |
| 2025 | ** "I'm going up to Portland." "Go ahead. I won't stop you." "Where does this road go?" "Don't go nowhere, mister. Stays right here." "Can I take this road up to Portland?" "Well, sure...but they've got all the roads up to Portland that they need." |
| 2026 | ** "Sorry to hear they're burying your pa." "Got to. He's dead." |
| 2027 | * According to an {{urban legend|s}}, when the notorious bank robber Willie Sutton was asked why he robbed banks, he replied "Because that's where the money is." [[BeamMeUpScotty He denied ever saying this]]. |
| 2028 | * The footballer Mario Balotelli crashed his car in August 2010, with ~$8000 in the glove compartment. Asked why, he answered "Because I am rich." |
| 2029 | * Creator/ReneMagritte painting ''TheTreacheryOfImages'', which shows a pipe with the phrase, "Ceci n'est pas une pipe," (translation: this is not a pipe) under it. It isn't a pipe; it is an ''image'' of a pipe. Later in life, Magritte made it clear that this was a Mathematician's Answer: |
| 2030 | --> The famous pipe. How people reproached me for it! And yet, could you stuff my pipe? No, it's just a representation, is it not? So if I had written on my picture "This is a pipe," I'd have been lying! |
| 2031 | * When asked why Mitt Romney failed to win the Presidency in 2012, Chris Christie said that the reason was simple: "He didn't get enough votes." |
| 2032 | * Likewise, P.J. O'Rourke's riposte to Jimmy Carter's stating in a memoir that "We needed a lot more volunteers in 1980!" was "Pal, what you needed was ''votes''." |
| 2033 | * [[http://clientsfromhell.net/post/29560499320/client-i-want-to-print-my-logo-on-a-t-shirt-me This]] conversation from Clients from Hell: |
| 2034 | --> '''Client:''' I want to print my logo on a t-shirt\ |
| 2035 | '''Me:''' Will the t-shirt be white or coloured?\ |
| 2036 | '''Client:''' Yes.\ |
| 2037 | '''Me:''' ...''Is'' it white or coloured?\ |
| 2038 | '''Client:''' Oh! White!\ |
| 2039 | '''Me:''' Do you want the print to last long or is it just for an event?\ |
| 2040 | '''Client:''' OK. |
| 2041 | * Many times when a magician is asked how a trick is done, they will answer "''Very'' carefully" or something similar. |
| 2042 | * Parents of small children might find the Mathematician's Answer handy when [[TheTalk the kids ask questions about "the birds and the bees"]] before they are deemed ready to know (or if the parents are just too embarrassed to answer). |
| 2043 | --> '''Small Child''': Mommy, where did I come from?\ |
| 2044 | '''Mom''': I already told you, dear. From Kansas City.\ |
| 2045 | '''Older Child''': Mom, if a man and a woman want to have a baby, what do they need to do?\ |
| 2046 | '''Mom''': Well, first they need to go out and buy a crib, a high chair, maybe a rattle, etc. |
| 2047 | * When George Pickett was asked why Pickett's Charge (the most famous Confederate attack during UsefulNotes/TheAmericanCivilWar) had failed, his answer was simple: "I've always thought the Yankees had something to do with it."[[note]]while his answer fits well with this trope, it is at the same time quite informative: up to the battle of Gettysburg the Confederate Army were able to win their battles because their leadership and morale typically outclassed those of the Union Army; the outcome of Pickett's Charge showed that the Union Army had finally closed the gap and, in a manner of speaking, arrived on the field[[/note]] |
| 2048 | * A letter published in the January 2014 issue of ''Car and Driver'' magazine was from a reader asking, "Can anyone tell me what Skyactiv technology actually does?" The editor's response? "Yes." |
| 2049 | * [[http://distractify.com/fun/fails/test-answers-that-are-totally-wrong-but-still-genius/ This post]] collects "38 Test Answers That Are 100% Wrong But Totally Genius At The Same Time." |
| 2050 | * If you ask a [[ManInAKilt true Scotsman]] what he is wearing under his kilt, he may answer, "[[GoingCommando Shoes]]." Similarly, if you ask him what is ''worn'' underneath, he may inform you that "nothing is 'worn', everything is in working condition." |
| 2051 | * Hans Asperger, from whom we get UsefulNotes/AspergerSyndrome, once asked one of his subjects, a little girl who was playing with her toys, whether she could count to ten. She answered "Yes." Then she went back to playing with her toys. |
| 2052 | ** This is common in many young children. They either don't recognize the implied expectation for them to perform the task/provide a more detailed explanation or they simply don't feel like complying with it. Another example is a little girl who liked cold weather wasn't wearing a jacket outside. Her teacher asked if she had a jacket, and she answered yes and went back to playing. |
| 2053 | ** Autistic and Asperger's people of ''all'' ages often use this, due to a combination of being extremely LiteralMinded and taking the "logical" process to its limits. Often they genuinely don't realize that the other person was expecting any other kind of answer. |
| 2054 | * Creator/TomScott put out [[https://youtu.be/IJEaMtNN_dM a video]] that goes into detail about Grice's Maxims and The Cooperative Principle (of language). A Mathematician's Answer is usually breaking The Cooperative Principle, usually the Maxim of Quantity by giving too little information. |
| 2055 | * Teachers in technical writing classes will sometimes use this to demonstrate just how hard it is to write with sufficient detail. They'll ask the class to instruct them to perform some mundane task, such as making a PB&J sandwich, and interpret the instructions as literally (and incorrectly) as possible. For example, if someone says simply "put the jelly on the bread", the teacher might place the jar of jelly on top of the bag of bread. This is also common in classes on logic, formal language and programming. |
| 2056 | * A gossip columnist sent a telegram to Creator/CaryGrant's studio asking "How Old Cary Grant?" Grant sent a reply telegram saying "Old Cary Grant Fine. How You?" |
| 2057 | * During the 1896 UsefulNotes/OlympicGames, the Hungarian swimmer Alfréd Hajós won two gold medals. During a dinner honoring the winners, the Crown Prince of UsefulNotes/{{Greece}} asked Hajós where he had learned to swim so well. Hajós answered "In the water". |
| 2058 | * One clever response to an online pickup: a guy asks a girl to send him a picture of her in a bikini. So she gets a photograph of herself, places it in a bunched-up swimsuit, and sends a picture of it all. |
| 2059 | * Retail employees may recognize this; |
| 2060 | -->'''Sales Associate:''' Can I help you?\ |
| 2061 | '''Customer:''' (grinning) Only if you have any free money.\ |
| 2062 | '''Sales Associate:''' ''[[[NeverHeardThatOneBefore strained smile]]]'' |
| 2063 | * At a ''Series/BattlestarGalactica2003'' conference, someone asked star Creator/JamieBamber, "How many people would you kill so that you could be on ''Series/DoctorWho''?" |
| 2064 | --> "None. Because that would be murder. And then I'd go to prison and I wouldn't be able to be on ''Series/DoctorWho''. ({{Beat}}). Duh." |
| 2065 | * This can come up in ''TabletopGame/MonsterOfTheWeek''. The rules for the '''investigate a mystery''' move specify that the GM has to answer honestly, within the limitations of the source the hunter is using to investigate. If the monster is something that doesn't appear in the chosen source - a technological abomination or alien being being looked up in a medieval grimoire, for example - the answers are likely to be deeply unhelpful but technically accurate. |
| 2066 | * Many [[http://www.cakewrecks.com/ Cakewrecks]] came to be when the cake decorator misread the instructions this way and simply wrote "HAPPY BIRTHDAY AND THEN IN BLUE BRIAN", "HAPPY VALENTINES DAY OVER A BIG HEART", or "(OLYMPIC RINGS)" on the top of the cake. |
| 2067 | * In French, one of the way of asking "what time is it?" is literally translated by "do you know what time is it?". Sometimes there's a smartass who answers "yes'. |
| 2068 | * The subreddit [[https://www.reddit.com/r/InclusiveOr /r/InclusiveOr]] lists many examples. |
| 2069 | * The Website/JollyRogerTelephoneCompany is an online company that offers bots which are designed to waste the time of telemarketers by using pre-written routines and otherwise responding with stuff like "Sure," "Mm-hmm," and "right." As such, any direct question, such as "Can you give me your credit card number?" (bank account number, etc.) will generally be answered in such a way, driving the telemarketers nuts, as the bots will say essentially that yes, they ''can'' give the number, but they never do. |
| 2070 | * Any time a {{heel}} in ProfessionalWrestling claims they won a match fair and square completely by themselves when they obviously took advantage of interference from a friend or from their {{face}} opponent's enemy to weaken the opponent for either their FinishingMove or directly for the pin cover. After all, the 3-count pin itself was entirely done by the heel in the match themselves, right? |
| 2071 | * When conducting a job interview, it's generally considered bad practice to ask questions that lend themselves to a simple yes/no answer, because such questions don't really do much to evaluate the candidate. So instead of asking "Have you ever done X?", a better question would be "Tell me about a time when you did X." |
| 2072 | %%* In 2018 Stand-Up Comedian Ian Hunt |
| 2073 | * According to a possibly apocryphal anecdote, during an official presidental trip UsefulNotes/CharlesDeGaulle had a brainfart and passed a paper to French Minister of Foreign Affairs [[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Maurice_Couve_de_Murville Maurice Couve de Murville]] asking "Couve, do you know the name of the Colombian Prime Minister?" Couve de Murville answered "Yes." De Gaulle gave him back the paper, adding "Yes who?", to which Couve de Murville answered "Yes, Sir!" |
| 2074 | * When ''Series/That70sShow'' was in pre-production, [[DawsonCasting the casting directors were scouting 18-to-20-year-old actors to play the teenage protagonists]], but Creator/MilaKunis, who was 14 at the time, merely told them that she'd be 18 "on [her] birthday". By the time they learned the truth, they already liked her performance as Jackie, so she stayed with the show in its entire run. |
| 2075 | * A widely-circulated rumor of the time said that Queen Victoria sent a letter to Oxford mathematician [[Creator/LewisCarroll Charles Dodgson]] praising "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland". She asked him to send him his next book. So he sent her "Elementary Treatise on Determinants". Dodgson later denied the rumor. |
| 2076 | * A number of common street hustles in New Orleans, Lousiana are based on this trope. The most common one is for the hustler to bet a tourist "I can tell you where you got your shoes." If the mark takes the bait, the hustler then answers "On your FEET!" Another common one is a bet to "spell your last name" ("Y O U R L A S T N A M E"). |
| 2077 | [[/folder]] |
| 2078 | ---- |
| 2079 | ->It's a third person singular neuter pronoun, [[Film/{{Airplane}} but that's not important right now.]] |
| 2080 |
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