| 1 | [[quoteright:257:[[WesternAnimation/{{Freakazoid}} https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/CandleJ_5419.jpg]]]] |
| 2 | [[caption-width-right:257:Candle Jack in a rare nighttime appeara--[[spoiler:I think I still have the cameraman.]] ]] |
| 3 | |
| 4 | ->''"I'm gonna need more rope."'' |
| 5 | |
| 6 | Tonight, on [[{{Pun}} Hasturpiece Theater]]... |
| 7 | |
| 8 | Describe Candle Jack he[[spoiler:is a very handsome guy. SO AM I! AS A HUMAN!]]\ |
| 9 | Stop hijacking my rightful place, Bill [[spoiler:TO CALLER.]] |
| 10 | [[spoiler:Well, that was slow.]]\ |
| 11 | As you can see, [[SpeakOfTheDevil speaking or merely typing the name]] of this ''{{WesternAnimation/Freakazoid}}'' villain (voiced by Creator/JeffBennett) will result in the speaker being abducted by said villain. Thus sentences tend to abruptly end when Candle Jack's name is spo[[spoiler:kane, Washington is a lovely city.]]\ |
| 12 | [[spoiler:This is going to be a busy day for me, isn't it? [[TemptingFate Hopefully not...]]]]\ |
| 13 | A notable villain in that he had very few appearances, but was so memorable that everyone remembers the one where everyone said "Candle Jack" and[[spoiler:went offscreen for a couple of scenes.]]\ |
| 14 | [[spoiler:You guys just aren't that bright, are you? Or are you just plain dumb?]] \ |
| 15 | For those of you who came here actually looking for information, not in-jokes, [[AvertedTrope Candle Jack]] is a villain from the cartoon ''WesternAnimation/{{Freakazoid}}''. He looks a little bit like the ''Franchise/{{Batman}}'' villain, the Scarecrow, or the ''WesternAnimation/{{Ben 10}}'' alien Ghostfreak, a bit like [[WesternAnimation/TheNightmareBeforeChristmas Oogie Boogie]], and kind of like the ''Franchise/{{Pokemon}}'' Dusclops (or Darkrai). He's [[DefangedHorrors pretty creepy for a children's cartoon]]. He only showed up in two episodes; in the first he would kidnap and tie up anyone who said his name, much to the annoyance of the hero (and ultimately [[Advertising/HostessFruitPies defeated by his love of pie]]), and in the second he spent the majority of the episode scaring Professor Jones. MemeticMutation has popularized the Candle Jack [[SubvertedTrope abduction meme.]][[spoiler:Paula Abdul's very pretty, by the way.]]\ |
| 16 | [[spoiler:Seriously.]]\ |
| 17 | In the original toons nobody got kidnapped in the middle of a sentence, but [[PaintingTheMedium that's really the only way to make the joke funny in a written format]]. Though the general rule is that he's nice enough to hit Submit for you on the way out. And also spoiler mark it for you.\ |
| 18 | [[spoiler:Might as well be polite.]]\ |
| 19 | Oddly enough, on Website/GameFAQs, there seems to be a bit of SeriousBusiness on whether Candle Jack deletes your signature or n[[spoiler:EVER! I'm not that cruel.]]\ |
| 20 | [[spoiler:I'm gonna need more rope.]]\ |
| 21 | |
| 22 | Seriously, if you actually see someone complete their sentence after saying his name, it's a full six-pack in the [[DrinkingGame/TVTropes drinking game]]. The only thing worse is when someone posts in a thread about him and disappears without ever having said his name.\ |
| 23 | [[spoiler:24 months sober.]]\ |
| 24 | [[spoiler:Are we almost done here? I have an appointment to keep.]]\ |
| 25 | Now somewhat of a DiscreditedMeme, as can be expected if everyone who says 'Candle Jack' disap[[spoiler:Whoa, hey, not ''my'' fault.]] |
| 26 | |
| 27 | [[http://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Jeff_Bennett&oldid=530032152 Has even infiltrated]] Website/TheOtherWiki - see the entry for ''WesternAnimation/{{Freakazoid}}'' |
| 28 | |
| 29 | This wave of abduction leads to an interesting question : [[FridgeLogic Who clicked on the 'save' button to validate all those unfinished messages?]] ME! AH-HA-HA-HA-HA! IT'S FUNNY HOW DUMB YOU ARE,CANDLE JACK! [[spoiler:Thank you fellow villan!]] |
| 30 | * Candle Jack himself, of cou[[spoiler:ld conceivably go on forever if you guys don't learn, soon.]] |
| 31 | ** Oh, that's very polite of him! Thank you, kind Candle Jack, that's very kind of y[[spoiler:ou're welcome.]] |
| 32 | *** This is getting ridiculous; I refuse to pretend that every time I say Candle Jack he c[[spoiler:uts you off? Okay then!]] |
| 33 | *** When are people going to learn that saying Candle Jack is asking for tro[[spoiler:lling coming your way? You're making my job easy.]] |
| 34 | *** I still don't see what's so wrong about ending a sentence with Candle Jack[[spoiler:. -Don't forget the full stop on the way out.]] |
| 35 | *** You guys are all idiots! At this rate, Candle Jack is going to have to char[[spoiler:ter a bus? Good idea.]] |
| 36 | *** I wonder what Candle Jack does to the tropers he ki[[spoiler:ndly takes out for a drive? Why, we go for a nice brunch! I even pay for the little ones, too.]] |
| 37 | *** Will I be okay if I refer to his name as a foreign one? Like Candle Jacque or som[[spoiler:ething similar? No, that won't help.]] |
| 38 | *** Okay, this is getting ridiculous. The cartoon this guy appeared in stopped airing years ago. I honestly don't think that Candle Jack is still[[spoiler:...I stand corrected.]] |
| 39 | *** [[spoiler:[[NiceJobBreakingItHero I'm out of rope. Good going.]]]] |
| 40 | *** Alright, I think it's safe to say Candle Jack everyb[[spoiler:ody. Nope.]] |
| 41 | *** I think I'll be fine. Candlejack is [[spoiler:probably in your house? Yeah, I see you on your phone!]] I was going to say on the other side of the wo[[spoiler:ah, just remember that C A N D L E J A C K I S E V E R Y W H E R E]] |
| 42 | *** Dear Mr. Jack, I would like to take this opportunity to inform you of an offer my company would like to make: Candle Jack Brand Ro[[spoiler:pe.]] |
| 43 | *** What if I end my sentence with Candle Jack [[spoiler:nope.]] |
| 44 | *** I’m choosing guests for a wedding. And I guess Candlejack is [[spoiler:invited? How sweet of you! Where’s my seat?]] |
| 45 | *** You know what? This is ridiculous. There's no such thing as Candle Jack. See? I finished my senten[[spoiler:ce. You definitely had that coming to ya.]] |
| 46 | *** I actually think he is a nice guy, he takes people to a nice tour around holding everyone tightly to him. Thanks Candle Jack [[spoiler:no problem buddy.]] |
| 47 | *** Oh come on, you really think I'd say Candle Jack- Son of a- [[spoiler:Next word that comes out of your mouth better be gun.]] -[[ThisIsForEmphasisBitch -bi]][[spoiler:[[CurseCutShort ngo!]] But seriously, you had it coming.]] |
| 48 | *** I can say it perfectly fine. Candle Jack. See[[spoiler:that he's pretty handsome.]] |
| 49 | *** This is killing me. Cabdle Jack could be right behind me. OOH! I typed "Cabdle" not Candle! Now he will never get me ev[[spoiler:er? Sorry poor fellow. Cabdle is close enough. You tropers are like lemmings. It-]] I escaped hi[[spoiler:No you didn't.]] |
| 50 | *** Guy seems nice. Hi, Jack Candle [[spoiler:. Hi there, thanks.]] |
| 51 | *** He is only a guy doing his job. Kinda silly but all in good fun. Light the Candle, Jack [[spoiler:. Said candle is lit. You're welcome.]] |
| 52 | *** Candle Jack-as[[spoiler:tonishing. Do you kiss your mother with that mouth?]]\ |
| 53 | |
| 54 | [[spoiler:You just don't learn, do you? At this rate, you're all gonna be with me.]] |
| 55 | |
| 56 | [[https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/000/754/738/09e.jpg Wanna bet? I brought help.]] |
| 57 | |
| 58 | [[spoiler:Oh Cra]] |
| 59 | |
| 60 | Proving that even Candle Jack is scared of the Goddamn Bat[[spoiler:man that Bale guy has a gravelly voice!]] |
| 61 | |
| 62 | |
| 63 | [[http://i2.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/000/919/713/99c.jpg Sorry, kids, but not even]] Franchise/{{Batman}} is immune. [[spoiler:No, but I wish he was. Being strangled hurts!]] |
| 64 | |
| 65 | * Guys, come on, seriously? Candle Jack doesn't exist. See? I finished the sentence and n[[spoiler:ever should have done that.]] |
| 66 | |
| 67 | * Candle Jack can't get me. I'm finishing this sentence riiiiiiiiiiiiiii[[spoiler:ght after this break.]] |
| 68 | |
| 69 | * Candle Jack. [[spoiler:Candle Jack? Damnit.]] |
| 70 | |
| 71 | |
| 72 | |
| 73 | |
| 74 | |
| 75 | [[spoiler:iiiiiight now]] |
| 76 | ** Nope, finished this sentence right now. Candle Jack. Finish [[spoiler:your feeble attempts to circumvent the Candle Jacking so I can go to bed. Wait, if I say my own]] [[{{VideoGame/Fallout2}} Navarro]] [[RunningGag is not an okay place to live.]] [[DefiedTrope Huh, I think we might have gotten him beat!]] Just make Candle Jack say Can[[spoiler:-openers [[CaptainObvious make opening cans easier.]]]] |
| 77 | |
| 78 | * Candle Jac- [[{{WesternAnimation/Futurama}} ALL GLORY TO THE ]][[spoiler:[[{{WesternAnimation/Futurama}} what, a mind-altering frog or something?]]]] |
| 79 | * Can I think your name Mr. Jack?[[spoiler:Sure buddy, go ahead.]] |
| 80 | * What if we called him Taperjohn? It basically means Candlejack, but we wou[[spoiler:ld almost get away with it.]] |
| 81 | [[VideoGame/GrandTheftAutoSanAndreas All we had to do was follow the damn train, Candle Jack]][[spoiler:! My rope leaving San Fierro with the yay again, right?]] |
| 82 | * Right, Candle Jack, but they use bikes and [[spoiler:go cross-country? I got this.]] |
| 83 | * Can't be summoned when I say Cndlejck. [[spoiler:No]] A's [[spoiler:m]]a[[spoiler:ke no difference, buddy.]] |
| 84 | ** [[WesternAnimation/SouthPark I'm not your buddy, guy.]] |
| 85 | *** [[spoiler:I'm not your guy, friend!]] |
| 86 | |
| 87 | Hey Candle Jack? Is your birth name [[spoiler:John Candle? Candle is my mother's maiden name. Try again.]] |
| 88 | |
| 89 | [[SubvertedTrope CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK CANDLEJACK]][[spoiler:[[DoubleSubversion WILL YOU]] [[SuddenlyShouting PLEASE]] [[BigShutUp SHUT UP!?]] Thank you.]] |
| 90 | |
| 91 | * [[spoiler:!?!?!saedi of tuo nur reven elpoep uoy lliW]]-[[SdrawkcabName awkcab]] kcajeldnaC yas I fi tahw oS |
| 92 | |
| 93 | * How about we just call him Mr. Jack? |
| 94 | ** Or at least Candle? |
| 95 | [[spoiler:Sure, why not?]] |
| 96 | |
| 97 | Maybe to stop him, we should lock ComicBook/TheJoker in a room with that Candle Jack wack[[spoiler:y guy he is. He's a fun poker buddy. 'Says I'm a good sport.]] |
| 98 | ---- |
| 99 | At least we're safe from Candle Jack in TheStinger area.[[spoiler:Actually not really. Darn it, [[GonnaNeedMoreX I'm out of rope again.]] ]] |
| 100 | ---- |
| 101 | >That does it, I'm calling Creator/ChuckNorris. |
| 102 | ---- |
| 103 | Forget Chuck Norris. Someone call Cosgrove. He'll point his finger at Candle Jack and tell him to [[spoiler:Or, you know, you could just... stop typing my name. Seriously, people.]] ...or you could stop kidnapping people instead. Just saying. [[spoiler:As if Cosgrove could actually stop me. Trust me, Freakazoid tried, it did not work. I think I still have them in my inventory.]] |
| 104 | ---- |
| 105 | It does makes me wonder, why does Candle Jack ha[[spoiler:ppen to take so many people along for a ride? I'm a nice guy, it's second nature to me. Now stop saying my name already, I have better stuff to do.]] |
| 106 | ---- |
| 107 | Will do, Candle...CRAP! I almost said Jack... oops. |
| 108 | [[spoiler:Nope. Not doing this shit anymore. You capture yourself. I'm going to the Bahamas.]] |
| 109 | ---- |
| 110 | Who would get me first? This guy, or Beetlejuice? Because if you say Beetlejuice three times, Beetlejuice will get you before Candlejack wou[[spoiler:ld? Yeah, you keep telling yourself that.]] |
| 111 | ---- |
| 112 | Rejoice, friends and comrades! I present you with my new, patent-pending, CANDLE JACK REPELLENT![[spoiler:A repellent that works on me? That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard of.]] |
| 113 | ---- |
| 114 | [[WesternAnimation/DoraTheExplorer Jack, no swiping! Jack, no swiping! Jack, no-]] [[spoiler:You're too late! They'll never find you now! ...What, don't you watch the show enough? [[NotMakingThisUpDisclaimer That actually happens every now and then.]]]] |
| 115 | ---- |
| 116 | I can't help but wonder: What would happen if Candlejack said his own [[spoiler:name? Well, I can't kidnap myself, so nothing would happen. Candlejack! See? Now come with... Wait, did I just tie myself up?]] |
| 117 | ---- |
| 118 | I'm confused! How do you spell his name? Is it Candle Jack or Candlejack? [[spoiler:Seriously? You're not even supposed to be saying it in the first place!]] |
| 119 | ---- |
| 120 | What is all of this stuff about Candle Jack? I don't even know who he is! |
| 121 | [[spoiler:Oh, hey. I'm out of rope. Do you have some?]] |
| 122 | Oh, me? Sure! [[TooDumbToLive Here you go!]] Don't spend it[[spoiler:hank you very much.]] |
| 123 | ---- |
| 124 | Hey Candle Jack, you look like you could use a h[[spoiler:ug. Thanks, I needed that. It's been a long day.]] |
| 125 | ---- |
| 126 | [---Heh heh heh. Candle Jack will never find me all the way down he[[spoiler:You wanna bet, buddy?]]---] |
| 127 | ---- |
| 128 | I wonder... If I [[JustForFun/CandleJack pothole his name...]] [[TemptingFate what happens to the further potholes?]] [[HopeSpot and is it a working looph]][[spoiler:afraid not, my friend.]] |
| 129 | ---- |
| 130 | And what about "C....e J..k", huh? Will I get kid[[spoiler:Y.s]] |
| 131 | ---- |
| 132 | I work in a tech support and I've just received a complaint from a certain Jack Candle! Is it safe for me t[[spoiler:hey never stop falling for this one.]] |
| 133 | ---- |
| 134 | [[spoiler:One clever a was that, admit I'll but, too him kidnapped I but, that tried Warp Thyme]]spe [[VideoGame/PlantsVsZombies2ItsAboutTime Warp Thyme]] that way the in name Jack's Candle speak I if what. |
| 135 | ---- |
| 136 | Candle Jack? What is that, an [[FusionDance amalgam]] of [[Anime/GregoryHorrorShow H]][[spoiler:That's not for you to know.]] |
| 137 | ---- |
| 138 | [[Series/DoctorWho CAPTAIN JA]][[Series/{{Torchwood}} CK HARKNESS!]] GOTCHA [[ThisIsForEmphasisBitch B]][[spoiler:ye. It's close enough for me. He's a good guy. Don't hug him for more than five seconds, though.]] |
| 139 | ---- |
| 140 | Wait, how did they [[ComicallyMissingThePoint cast Candle Jack if Candle Jack would just kidnap all his voice act]][[spoiler:It's called a casting couch.]] |
| 141 | ---- |
| 142 | Jack be nimble |
| 143 | Jack be quick |
| 144 | Jack jumped over |
| 145 | The candlest[[spoiler:ill expecting some kind of immunity to fire, I guess. I won't complain, he was so busy treating the burns he didn't even notice me.]] |
| 146 | ---- |
| 147 | So does this mean that all our Tropers are belong to Candle Jack[[spoiler:[[SymbolSwearing ?@#$]], that meme went out of style years ago. I don't want to hear it again.]] |
| 148 | ---- |
| 149 | %%Heh heh heh... This is the perfect hiding spot. Candle Jack will never think to edit and find this hidden te[[spoiler:How else do you think I comment on your idiocy? Psychic powers?]] |
| 150 | ---- |
| 151 | How about if I say Candle Jane? Does that bring up any r[[spoiler:[[RuleSixtyThree ule 63]] applies to me too, so yes.]] |
| 152 | ---- |
| 153 | Candle Jacking off a d[[spoiler:EXCUSE ME!?]] |
| 154 | ---- |
| 155 | I like the new Website/TVTropes layout. Candle Jack, WHOOPS, what do you th[[spoiler:it's alright, could be better, could be worse.]] |
| 156 | ---- |
| 157 | So, if a common crook jacks a candle truck, does that st[[spoiler:op me? Nah, it's just a stunt to let me rope you all in.]] |
| 158 | ---- |
| 159 | TOP O THE MORNIN TO YA LADDIES MY NAME IS CANDLEJACKSEPTICEYE AND WELCOME TO PHOTOBOOTH! |
| 160 | * Uh. Hey Candle Jack, can you kidnap the guy above me for m[[spoiler:ight wanna consider that I don't take requests.]] |
| 161 | ---- |
| 162 | [[StatingtheSimpleSolution Has no one guessed yet that you should just stop saying his name?]] What do you think, Candle Jack[[spoiler:? I agree. Seriously, I've run out of rope multiple times on this page alone.]] |
| 163 | ---- |
| 164 | Does he have a wife named Jill[[spoiler:? Nope, still single.]] |
| 165 | ---- |
| 166 | [[FridgeLogic Wait, if he can only hear people say his name, why does typing Candle Jack make h]][[spoiler:onestly, just roll with it.]] |
| 167 | ---- |
| 168 | Iway etbay ifway eway aysay Andlecay Ackjay inway Igpay Atinlay, aybemay ehay on'tway[[spoiler:Orrysay, onay iceday.]] |
| 169 | ---- |
| 170 | Hey Candle Jackoff, what's your opinion on [[Series/LazyTown LazyTow]][[spoiler:http://air-ride-adventures.wikia.com/wiki/Air_Ride_Adventures_Wiki]] |
| 171 | ---- |
| 172 | Hey Candle Jack? [[Series/LazyTown HERE'S A LITTLE LESSON IN]][[spoiler:NOPE! Not today.]] |
| 173 | ---- |
| 174 | Y'know what'd be awesome? Getting Trope-tan to come on over and fight the guy this very page is about. We oughta give her IdiotBall to the aforementioned guy. [[ShoutOut Fight of the]] [[Webcomic/TheOrderOfTheStick year, no question.]] |
| 175 | ---- |
| 176 | [=FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUdge=] and macaroni sounds tasty. |
| 177 | ---- |
| 178 | Ya know what? I'm going to start a charity. It will go towards buying Candle Jack more r[[spoiler:ope? [[SincerityMode Aww, thanks, that's so nice of you!]] Especially since everyone here's an idiot.]] |
| 179 | ---- |
| 180 | What if we called Candle Jack something like Lantern John[[spoiler:no way. At this rate you're just toying with me. Good thing I have tons of rope from that charity.]] |
| 181 | ---- |
| 182 | Jxbv, jrrg qhzv! L'p xvlqj Fdhvdu Flskhuv! Wklv zloo vxuhob shuvxdgh Fdqgoh Mdfn[[spoiler:wr nlgqds pruh shrsoh? Vxuh, zkb qrw, hyhubrqh hovh lv lq rq lw, dssduhqwob.]] |
| 183 | --->'''Translation:''' Guys, good news! I'm using Caesar Ciphers! This will surely persuade Candle Jack[[spoiler:to kidnap more people? Sure, why not, everyone else is in on it, apparently.]] |
| 184 | ---- |
| 185 | What would happen if [[WesternAnimation/GravityFalls Bill]] [[EldritchAbomination Ci]][[RealityWarper pher]] said "Candle Jack?" [[spoiler:He did it nearby this location.43.8041° N, 120.5542° W BROKE OUT OF HIS ROPE AND TOOK CANDLE JACK OUT]] of spoilers. |
| 186 | * This...is unbelievable! I feel so good every time I look at this page. Especially after today's exceptionally horrible happenings. I can't believe you guys (whoever you are) let Bill Cipher hijack and share this page just for little old me![[note]]I am not Gideon. My Cipher Wheel symbol is the puzzle piece (shut up, it's an AU).[[/note]] |
| 187 | ** Signed, a person going through a very hard period of life and facing the possibility of actual clinical depression.[[note]]on top of anxiety issues and Asperger's. I'm sure Bill will find some way to make fun of me for that. Do your worst, Cipher.[[/note]] You made me feel better. |
| 188 | * Now where was I? Oh, yes. So apparently Bill was .3 miles away from the Central Oregon Highway when he last said "Candle Jack"? No, it's the exact center of Oregon. Love, Tropers/JumbledDesert (the guy who thought this up after watching every Bill episode of Gravity Falls). |
| 189 | |
| 190 | ---- |
| 191 | [[spoiler:What if I just hide in the spoilers? Candle Jack will never find me hidden in plain s]][[spoiler:poilers are mine. Copyright.]] |
| 192 | ---- |
| 193 | -- .- -.-- -... . / .. -. / -- --- .-. ... . / -.-. --- -.. . / -.-. .- -. -.. .-.. . / .--- .- -.-. -.- / -.-. .- -. .----. -[[spoiler:-.-. .- - -.-. .... / .- / -... .-. . .- -.- ..--.. / -.-- . .- .... --..-- / --- -.- .-.-.-]] |
| 194 | --->'''Translation:''' Maybe in morse code Candle Jack can't[[spoiler:catch a break? Yeah, ok.]] |
| 195 | ---- |
| 196 | CAN't you just put the house on JACKS? You are so DULL. [[spoiler:I hate this guy]] |
| 197 | ---- |
| 198 | [[[{{Leitmotif}} da da DA da DA DADAAAAAAA...]]] [[{{SelfDemonstrating/Freakazoid}} Whoosssssssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh........ Well, if it isn't-]] |
| 199 | ** '''NO!''' |
| 200 | ** What? I was just gonna say- |
| 201 | ** '''NO!''' |
| 202 | ** Don't say it! |
| 203 | ** Don't say ''what''? |
| 204 | ** Don't say his name! |
| 205 | ** You mean, don't say Candle Jack? [[spoiler:Some things never change.]] |
| 206 | ** Freakazoid, why did you say his name? |
| 207 | ** 'Cause I-I wanted to do one of those funny things like, hey ever watch Series/FTroop where Agarn says "There's no way I'm wearin' a dress, absolutely not! No dress!" and Forrest Tucker's like "''Yeah your wearin' that dress! Your gonna wear that dress!''" and then they wipe blblblbl! and Agarn's wearing a dress. [[spoiler:Oh, I love that bit. That's why I let him finish.]] |
| 208 | |
| 209 | ---- |
| 210 | |
| 211 | '''[[spoiler:Bill]]''': [[spoiler:HEY GUYS HOW'S IT GOIN'?!]] |
| 212 | |
| 213 | * Am I safe? I guess s[[spoiler:nope.]] |
| 214 | ---- |
| 215 | * I wonder if I'd be safer if I said it in [[GratuitousJapanese Japanese...]] *shrugs* Koko ni wa nani mo ikimasen... [[note]]Translation: Here goes nothing...[[/note]] Kyandorujakku... *looks around* Well, [[spoiler:Īe, sō wa omowanai... [[note]]Translation: No, I don't think so...[[/note]] [[note]]You didn't think I wouldn't be able to understand you, did you?[[/note]]]] |
| 216 | ---- |
| 217 | * Jung vs V hfr [=EBG13=]? Jvyy Pnaqyr Wnpx fgvyy xvqan[[spoiler:Lrf.]] |
| 218 | -->'''Translation''': What if I use [=ROT13=]? Will Candle Jack still kidna[[spoiler:Yes.]] |
| 219 | ---- |
| 220 | * Okay... [[DidntThinkThisThrough Maybe it wasn't such a good idea to use romanji...]] Maybe if I used katakana, It wouldn't happen again... *shrugs* それはショットの価値がある... [[note]] Sore wa shotto no kachigāru... (Translation: It's worth a shot...) [[/note]] 蝋燭ジャック... [[note]] Rōsokujyakku... [[/note]] *looks around* I guess no[[spoiler:ばかみたい... [[note]] Baka mitai... (Translation: What an idiot...) [[/note]] [[note]] I can still understand you kid... [[/note]] ]] |
| 221 | ---- |
| 222 | * What if I say Jandlecack? [[spoiler:NO! My weakness! Now I have to kidnap you before ''they'' show up!]] |
| 223 | ---- |
| 224 | * Heh, Candle Jack is such a bad idea of a name! Why not Ropeman? [[spoiler:I'll be honest with you: my parents never loved me. That's why I do what I do: to have friends. Maybe. I forgot exactly WHY I do this...]] |
| 225 | ---- |
| 226 | * I wonder if Ulysses[[note]](some random demon OC of mine)[[/note]] could say Candle Jack without consequen[[spoiler:Nope.]] |
| 227 | ---- |
| 228 | * I've been kidnapped by murderers. If I say his name, will Candle Jack rescue me? [[spoiler:No. In fact, I think I'll kidnap the murderers too.]] |
| 229 | ---- |
| 230 | * [[ShoutOut I always win, Candle Jack.]] |
| 231 | ** [[spoiler:BringIt]] |
| 232 | ---- |
| 233 | * Hey guys, I have a friend named Dill. He goes on and on about how he can steal anything, but my bike is locked up inside my garage. What do you think? Can Dill jack my bi[[spoiler:Probably.]] |
| 234 | ---- |
| 235 | * If I taught a parrot how to say Mr. Candle Jackson's name, would it tie up the parrot? [[spoiler:Yes. And you too. No exceptions.]] |
| 236 | |
| 237 | And even if Ol' Jackie tried to kidnap me for asking that, at least I have my loaded shotgun to scare[[spoiler:I stole the shells too.]] |
| 238 | ---- |
| 239 | * Who would win a fist fight, Candle Jack, or [[WesternAnimation/TheGrimAdventuresOfBillyAndMandy LORD MOLDY]][[spoiler:Haha, [[BringIt Come at me, Moldy.]]]] |
| 240 | ---- |
| 241 | * I bet that Candle Jack is so handsome under that hood that if he appeared in broad daylight, he'd be surrounded by [[BishieSparkles Bishie Spar]][[spoiler:e me from this nonsense.]] |
| 242 | ---- |
| 243 | * You'll never catch me, Candlejack! Not when I shift into MAXIMUM OVERDRIVE! HIYA!!!!!! [[spoiler:You should've gotten the turbo charge.]] |
| 244 | ---- |
| 245 | * Is it true that Candlejack forces you to watch a new TV show of Sinbad? [[spoiler:[[EvenEvilHasStandards Nope. I draw the line at Sinbad.]] Never again.]] |
| 246 | ---- |
| 247 | * How about I just tie HIM up first before Candlejack ties up me? [[spoiler:Not fast enough, senór.]] |
| 248 | ---- |
| 249 | * Fine. Candlejack, tie me up. |
| 250 | * ...nothing? What, am I not good enoug[[spoiler:had to get more rope. You people, honestly.]] |
| 251 | ---- |
| 252 | * Hey, Candlejack, tell me your weakn[[spoiler:No.]] |
| 253 | ---- |
| 254 | * Surely typing the name Candlejack isn't the same as saying his name out loud, right? [[spoiler:Nope.]] |
| 255 | ---- |
| 256 | * What if someone Candle Jack couldn't move, like the [[Franchise/TheLegendOfZelda Great Deku Tree]], were to s[[spoiler:eriously, you all need to stop! And to answer your question, I'd probably tie him up where he is, then uproot him. Don't know where I'd get enough rope, though.]] |
| 257 | ---- |
| 258 | * Well, sucks to be you guys, at least I'm smart enough not to say his n[[spoiler:ow let's be honest, you were going to say it eventually.]] |
| 259 | ---- |
| 260 | * [[SelfDemonstrating/AbridgedMrPopo Huh, where's the fresh meat? Popo's training starts in five minutes. This Candle Jack guy must not be]][[spoiler:Welp, that's my cue.]] [[NoSell Is there a problem maggot?]] [[spoiler:What? [[HorrifyingTheHorror OH GOD OH FUCK! I'm sorry, Master, I didn't recognize you!]]]] Then I'd take these ropes off if I were you. [[ImpliedDeathThreat There's still room in the F*ckbox you see]]. [[spoiler:[[AlwaysABiggerFish Don't worry sir, I haven't forgotten the pecking order]].]] That's a good maggot, Candle Jack. Just make s[[spoiler:orry sir, but you know the rules.]] ''Sighs'' (cue long distance shot of the trope subject hurtling thousands of feet to the ground below) Enjoy the climb back up, bitch. |
| 261 | ---- |
| 262 | * Cursed idea: [=CandleJacksfilms=]. Me me big r[[spoiler:eally, I'm flattered, but I don't have time for that silly video sharing site of yours.]] |
| 263 | ---- |
| 264 | * I wonder if getting [[MaliciousMisnaming Cadillac]]'s name wrong out of spite would cause Cardiac to kidnap me. Perhaps Cognac is waiting for people to say "Cyrax" and butchering it enough times would cause Ginger Snap to break his rules out of frustration? [[spoiler:No, but you're pushing it.]] |
| 265 | ** Oh, good, Celiac didn’t take me. I can’t come up with any other names for Camelback, but I'll tell you if I come up with any more, Candle [[{{Troll}} Wax]]. |
| 266 | ---- |
| 267 | * He can't get me if I say his name in a really pretentious, SesquipedalianLoquaciousness manner, right? Ignitable Wick Embedded in Wax Jacobus! [[spoiler:You did say my name.]] |
| 268 | ---- |
| 269 | C_NDL_ J_CK [[spoiler:[[Series/WheelOfFortune I'd like to buy a vowel.]]]] |
| 270 | ---- |
| 271 | * Does Jack have any association to Candle Cove? [[spoiler:That show never existed and you know it.]] |
| 272 | ---- |
| 273 | * [[Music/DonMclean JACK be nimble, Jack be quick, Jack Flash sat on the CANDLEstick,]] [[spoiler:Because, fire is the Devil's only friend...]] |
| 274 | ---- |
| 275 | * I wonder what will happen if I mention [[https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/scp-2521 ●●|●●●●●|●●|●]] and Candle Jack in one sente [[spoiler:Wow, he didn't even get to finish his sentence, [[NotMeThisTime and I didn't do anything here]]! I was beaten to the punch! And I don't know why, [[NothingIsScarier but I can't even find or sense him anywhere!]] It's like he's gone for good! Speaking of, I censored that name because computers all over the world were getting stolen, and [[EvenEvilHasStandards not even I'm evil enough to let that happen]].]] |
| 276 | ---- |
| 277 | * Aut Jacobus Candelae, aut Johannes Candelae. Hmm. Nescio. [[spoiler:Jacobus Candelae est finis gratiae.]] |
| 278 | ---- |
| 279 | * I believe Candle Jack drives a [[VanInBlack Van in Bla]][[spoiler:nd, but with lots of space for abductees like you.]] |
| 280 | ** So...who pays for gas? [[spoiler:I do, of course! Though if you keep saying my name more than once, you have to pick up the tab instead. Buying rope all the time is expensive.]] |
| 281 | *** Ah! Well, thank you for answering that question. I'll just...be on my way, then, heh heh... ''(flags down a cab and gets the hell out of this bit)'' |
| 282 | |
| 283 | ---- |
| 284 | * [[SchmuckBait Don't put a picture of a candlestick and an automobile jack alongside of it.]] [[InvokedTrope Doing so makes the reader say the words out loud, and...]] ... OhCrap |
| 285 | ** ''(Gets snatched away with eveyone else.)'' |
| 286 | ---- |
| 287 | * Okay everyone, I'm going to start a test, I've hired Chuck Norris as a body guard, I think I'm safe to say the name Candle Jack... I think it wor[[spoiler:Nope, got him too. And I didn't even need to use the roundhouse kick!]] |
| 288 | ---- |
| 289 | hey. heyyyy. '''HEEEEEEEEYYYYYYYYYYY.''' ...can you sign my yearbook, candle boy? |
| 290 | ---- |
| 291 | * As someone whose main guiding principle is RuleOfFunny, it falls upon me to get myself kidnapped by Candle Jack in a humorous… wait, NO, I SAID IT TOO EARLY AND MESSED UP THE COMEDIC TI[[spoiler:ed up with all the rest of them. At least you tried your best.]] Can I get a redo? [[spoiler:No.]] |
| 292 | ---- |
| 293 | -->'''[[JustForFun/StatlerAndWaldorf Statler]]''': You know what I think about these people up there?\ |
| 294 | '''Waldorf:''' What would that be?\ |
| 295 | '''Statler:''' They're all fools.\ |
| 296 | '''Waldorf:''' You're right! Nobody can be so dumb as to say Candle Jack and\ |
| 297 | '''[[spoiler:Candle Jack]]:''' [[spoiler:Just so you know, you guys aren't immune either. [[BorrowedCatchphrase Do-ho-ho-ho-hoh!]]]] |
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