Line #6 Funny/Troy


1	!All spoilers will be unmarked ahead. Administrivia/YouHaveBeenWarned!
2	----
3	* The film opens with a CombatByChampion between Boagrius and Achilles...except Achilles didn't bother to show up.
4	-->'''Triopas''': Boagrius has that effect on many heroes.
5	* Helen and Paris at the start.
6	--> '''Helen:''' You shouldn't be here.\
7	'''Paris:''' That's what you said last night.\
8	'''Helen:''' Last night was a mistake.\
9	'''Paris:''' And the night before that?\
10	'''Helen:''' I have made many mistakes this week.
11	* Near the beginning of the movie, the look on Hector's face when he realizes just where Paris is... it's somewhere between OhCrap and YouHaveGotToBeKiddingMe.
12	* This exchange right before Paris reveals he secretly brought Helen with them to Troy. Hector's expressions (especially the ''massive'' OhCrap face when he finds out) are just glorious.
13	--> '''Paris:''' Do you love me, brother? Will you protect me from any enemy?\
14	''({{beat}})''\
15	'''Hector:''' ...The last time you spoke to me like this, you were ten years old and you had just stolen father's horse. '''''[[ThisIsGonnaSuck What have you done now?]]'''''
16	* In the Director's Cut, two of Agamemnon's messengers are dispatched to find Odysseus and come across a lone shepherd resting in the hills. When he hears who they're looking for, the shepherd begins to angrily rant about how Odysseus sucks, offending the men with his lack of respect for his king. [[KingIncognito The shepherd is Odysseus]] and he has a good laugh at their expense.
17	* Ajax being so eager to join in with Achilles and the Myrmidons in their assault on the beach, and him being so pissed off that his vessel isn't going any faster, that he pulls off one of the rowers and starts rowing himself.
18	-->Row you lazy whores, row! Greeks are dying!
19	* This exchange outside the newly sacked temple of Apollo:
20	-->'''Hector''': You speak of war as if it's a game. But how many wives wait at the gates of Troy for husbands they will never see again? \
21	'''Achilles''': [[RhetoricalQuestionBlunder Perhaps your brother can comfort them. I hear he's good at charming other men's wives.]]
22	* As the Greek ships are landing on the beaches of Troy, Achilles spots a familiar face who's just arrived...
23	-->'''Achilles''': If you sailed any slower, this war would be over! \
24	'''Odysseus''': I don't mind missing the start, just so long as I'm here at the end!
25	** HilariousInHindsight: This exchange is even funnier now that Creator/SeanBean (who played Odysseus) has become famous as a ChronicallyKilledActor... and this time his character actually made it to the credits!
26	* [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qnYdteja7Y0 The pointing and laughing that Agamemnon does]] during Menelaus and Paris's fight. It's so [[EvilIsHammy hammy]] and [[MoodDissonance contrary to the seriousness of the scene]] that it CrossesTheLineTwice to become downright hilarious.
27	* After being forced to retreat, Agamemnon angrily chugs his wine while complaining how Troy is "[[HypocriticalHumor DRUNK with victory]]".
28	* "Hectoooooooorrrrr! HECTOOOOOOORRRRRR!!!!"
29	** Gut-wrenchingly funny in the Russian dub. Why? Achilles is standing in an open field, yelling "'''''HECTAAAAAAAAAAAAARE!!! HECTAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARE!!!'''''"
30	* Paris gets a good barb in on Menelaus when the latter rants about him stealing his wife "in the middle of the night".
31	--> '''Paris:''' "[[ComicallyMissingThePoint The sun was shining when your wife left you]]."
32	* Odysseus doesn't mince words after Menelaus's death.
33	--> '''Odysseus:''' The men believe we came here for Menelaus's wife. Won't be needing her anymore.
34	--> '''Agamemnon:''' My brother's blood still wets the sand and you insult him!
35	--> '''Odysseus:''' It's no insult to say a dead man is dead.
36	** Nestor says the men's morale is merely "weak".
37	--> '''Odysseus:''' Weak? They're ready to swim home!
38	** Agamemnon rants about Achilles is as likely "to spear me as to speak to me!"
39	* Achilles attempts an AfterActionPatchUp to Briseis who, not unreasonably after nearly being gang raped, keeps slapping his hand away as he tries to mop her wounds. He then throws the cloth at her and she throws it back at him!

Context Funny / Troy