Line #1 Funny/TheWhitestKidsUKnow


1	* [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rurBHWxYaR0 Hitler Rap]]. It was the first skit shown after the initial ColdOpening & Credits in their first episode.
2	* The "[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RhUSKg-hJcE Hunting Accident]]" sketch, in which the shooter wants to go get help, but his friend tries convincing him to LeaveNoWitnesses, with the panicked victim ''and'' shooter reacting appropriately.
3	-->'''Bob''': No way, I can't kill somebody!\
4	'''Jerry''': What do you mean, Bob, [[ComicallyMissingThePoint you're already halfway there]]! You don't even have to shoot him again - just a quick heel to the temple.
5	* [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sz9MCCfgPMA The Sex Robot]] features, well [[ExactlyWhatItSaysOnTheTin a robot built for sex.]] And dancing. He frightens a neighborhood as he dances through looking for sex, is arrested by the police and [[EvenEvilHasStandards disgusts his inmates]] by humping the bars of his cell, and [[DisproportionateRetribution then is finally hanged]]. All while his theme song plays and his every action is narrated.
6	** Sex Robot never stops dancing, even on the gallows. Only death can stop his dancing.
7	** At the end, immediately after Sex Robot is hanged, one cop overseeing his execution asks another "What did we learn here today?" The other officer is ''about'' to answer, but then shuts his mouth upon realizing that [[ShaggyDogStory no lesson can be drawn from the life and death of Sex Robot]].
8	* [[https://youtu.be/SZoiJM1vlfc The Grapist]].
9	** The executive's stunned reaction and eventual acceptance to everyone else seeing nothing wrong with "The Grapist".
10	*** "Look what she's wearing!...it's purple!" 'Oh! Okay...NO! NO!"
11	** "Buy some today and get a free Grape Whistle!"
12	* [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cvkBvzpbBPs Abe Lincoln]].
13	-->'''Lincoln''': Ohhhh, [[MemeticMutation now you fucked up! Now you fucked up!]] Now you fucked up! You have fucked up now! Now you have fucked up! [[OverlyLongGag Now you fucked up! Now you fucked up!]]
14	** SUCK MY PRESIDENTIAL COCK, [[ThisIsForEmphasisBitch BITCH!]]
15	* [[https://youtu.be/li0d5WiQTgc Whale Training]].
16	* "The Popcorn Factory Sketch", which is about [[NonIndicativeName one man trying to convince his two friends that it wouldn't be gay if women had balls]]. The best part is arguably the name, because the fact that they work at a popcorn factory isn't even mentioned until the very end and the narrator openly mocks how difficult it would be for people to find the sketch on Youtube should they forget the popcorn factory part.
17	* "Kid Beer", specifically the part where [[ItMakesJustAsMuchSenseInContext the idea of selling beer directly to fetuses is such a great idea it destroys the fabric of time and space]]
18	* [[BerserkButton "PIZZA'S NOT FOR BREAKFAST!"]]
19	* [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jeu1_5KCXJs Bad Employee]]
20	* The Racist Show Pitches sketch.
21	** [[CrossesTheLineTwice "He was riding his bike, and there was a lighting strike and now he reads real fast he knows science and math Black Doctor!" ]]
22	-->'''Executive:''' (sighs) I"m going to go out on a limb here... where exactly did he get the bike?
23	-->'''Pitch Man:''' (Excitedly) He stole it!
24	** The RapidFireComedy exchange of [[CrossesTheLineTwice horribly racist titles]] at the end.
25	-->'''Pitch Man:''' Okay I got one more.
26	-->'''Executive:''' (resigned) Go ahead.
27	-->'''Pitch Man:''' It's called Jew Town!
28	-->'''Executive:''' [[NoJustNoReaction Nope!]]
29	-->'''Pitch Man:''' Too Many Lesbos!
30	-->'''Executive:''' Nope!
31	-->'''Pitch Man:''' What's the Deal with Mexican Tits?
32	-->'''Executive:''' [[GetOut Go away.]]
33	* The entirety of Civil War on Drugs is gold, but Trevor's off-topic ramble during the secession meeting takes the cake:
34	-->'''Trevor:''' We could, ehh... we could put a naked girl on the flag, with, like, big whoppers, and she's sittin' in her doorway, and you're walkin' through town, and she's like, "hey, stranger, come over here!" And you're like, "what do you want, woman?" And she's like, "so you can come in and have supper at my place," and you're like, "I'm a good Christian man with a wife at home, I can't be hangin' out with strange women," and she's like, "I ain't gonna bite you, mister," and you're like, "I don' know..." but then, all of a sudden, the rain starts comin', almost as if God Himself is pushin' you toward her doorway, so you go in, and she's sittin' down, and she's got a hot meal, and it's been a long time afore you've had a hot meal and a cool pillow, so you sit down, and she takes a napkin, tucks it into your collar, now it's been a long time afore you've felt the fingers of a woman, so you get a lot mighty excited, then all of a sudden, her sisters come over, and you're like "how many sisters?" One sister, two sister, three sister, four sister, five sister -- five sisters come over, so you're like, "oh my God, I gotta get outta here, the devil is temptin' me!" But then, all of a sudden, her clothes fall off, and you're like, "what?! How did that happen? A woman's clothes just fall right off her body?" Then your clothes fall off, and you're like, "what?! What's goin' on here?" Then an earthquake happens, you both land in the tub--
35	-->'''Zach:''' ''(exasperated)'' What are you doing?
36	--> '''Trevor:''' I dunno. I'm just... was just talkin'.
37	* Five words: Super Size Me with Whiskey.
38	* Nail Gun.
39	** "MY DICK SPLIT OPEN, AND LOCUSTS FLEW OUT!" 'You already said that part.' "WELL IT HAPPENED A LOT"
40	* "Shoshon the Elegant, the White Tiger King", a fake fable about the fascist King Shoshon, making tyrannical decrees in an obvious parody of white American discrimination towards Mexican immigrants (white tigers and brown tigers, respectively) with his overly-long title being repeated between each in majestic, overblown fashion. The best part is that he takes a break from the racism in the penultimate decree of the sketch:
41	-->'''Shoshon:''' Trash collection day will be every Tuesday. Park your car on the right side of the street the first and third Tuesdays of each month. Park your car on the left side every alternating Tuesday.
42	-->'''Other animals:''' ''(totally silent after cheering "White Tiger Kingdom!" for every other decree)''
43	-->'''Shoshon:''' ''(Main/{{Beat}})'' White Tiger Kingdom!
44	-->'''Other animals:''' WHITE TIGER KINGDOM! WHITE TIGER KINGDOM!

Context Funny / TheWhitestKidsUKnow