Line #0 Funny/TheAmazingSpiderMan


1	!![[Film/TheAmazingSpiderMan The 2012 Film]]
2	[[AC:Peter Parker]]
3	* The aftermath of Peter receiving his powers. After he gets bitten, he accidentally rips off the shirt of a nearby woman and gets into an accidental fight with an entire subway car of people that he accidentally wins. The next morning, he ''[[RingRingCrunch destroys]]'' his alarm clock as well as his sink. Special note goes to how, after he realizes his new strength, he slowly and carefully turns the bathroom doorknob open with two fingers.
4	** And then, after he starts to realize what is happening, he speeds through several websites looking for the species of spider that bit him or information relating to it. Until he has to stop because the keys have stuck to his fingers, and he had pulled them off without noticing.
5	** Special mention goes to him accidentally dislodging one of the poles in the train and then [[PlankGag smacking two guys who are just getting back up with it]]. It slowly falling off his hands just punctuates the silliness of the situation.
6	* [[http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m76p9pz23i1qaeot7o1_500.gif Peter's reaction]] when he finally gets his webshooters working. All that's missing is an overwrought "BEHOLD!"
7	* The entire CanNotSpitItOut [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CQAykc1X_2U conversation between Peter and Gwen]]. He spends almost ''five minutes'' just stuttering because of her, and Gwen just goes with it!
8	* Uncle Ben telling Gwen that Peter has a picture of her on his computer. And Peter's [[DiggingYourselfDeeper terrible attempt to explain it]].
9	-->'''Uncle Ben:''' ''[looking at Gwen]'' She looks familiar. She's the girl on your computer! ''[to Gwen]'' He's got you on his computer. I'm his probation officer. ''[to Peter]'' Don't forget Aunt May. ''[exits]''\
10	'''Peter:''' ''[nervously chuckles]'' Okay! ''[turns to face Gwen]'' Heh, that's a... character, that's my-my uncle. He, um, he's a pathological liar, and he thought you were someone else.\
11	'''Gwen:''' Aww, man, you don't have me on your computer?\
12	'''Peter:''' Well, yeah. I mean, like, I had-I took a photo of the debate team, and you're on the debate team, so...\
13	'''Gwen:''' Right.\
14	'''Peter:''' So, he must've seen me; [[ThatCameOutWrong I-I was touching up stuff.]]\
15	'''Gwen:''' ''[laughs]'' You were "touching up stuff"?\
16	'''Peter:''' ''[laughs]'' C'mon, I was-I was ju--... I'm not gonna answer that.
17	* The MoodWhiplash after Uncle Ben and Peter had an argument, and Ben unintentionally brings up his father. Peter angrily slams the door which shatters the glass. Cue awkward silence.
18	* Peter sneaks in through Gwen's window, having taken up her invitation to dinner with her family.
19	-->'''Peter:''' Hey.\
20	'''Gwen:''' Peter? How'd you get up here?\
21	'''Peter:''' Uh, fire escape.\
22	'''Gwen:''' That's, like, 20 stories.\
23	'''Peter:''' [[BlatantLies Your doorman's intimidating.]]
24	** Which gets a BrickJoke when he comes to her so she can patch up his wounds from his battle with the Lizard. This time, he gets her attention by banging his head on the window, before opening it to let himself in.
25	--->'''Gwen:''' You should maybe, uh, consider coming in through the lobby. ''[Peter laughs]'' Also, my father is under the impression that you require psychiatric attention.
26	[[AC:Spider-Man]]
27	* Our first look at the full-costumed Spider-Man, standing on a rooftop... with Peter's backpack on. And then he has to answer the phone. ''And'' it's Aunt May asking him to buy organic eggs.
28	** The way he boyishly sits and kicks his legs while talking sells it.
29	* Just about the ''entire'' carjacker scene is a hoot!
30	-->'''Spider-Man:''' ''[clears throat]'' You know, in the future, if you're gonna steal cars, don't dress like a car thief, man.\
31	'''Car Thief:''' Who are you? You a cop?\
32	'''Spider-Man:''' Really? You seriously think I'm a cop? A cop in a skin-tight red and blue suit? You know, you're-you're-you're--''[shoots web in the thief's face]'' You've got the mind of a true scholar, sir. ''[the thief opens the door, Spidey shoots web to close the door]'' I-I-I was going more for guy who do the luge. ''[shoots web to close the door again, the thief opens the window]'' Good thinking, good thinking. Use the window, get out the window. There you go, you got it. ''[thief falls outside]''
33	** [[OhCrapFakeout "You've found my weakness! It's small knives! Anything but knives!" [webs thug to the wall].]]
34	** Earlier:
35	--->'''Spider-Man:''' CROOOOOOOOTCH!
36	** He then goes for the face.
37	** When a police man shows up and points the gun at Peter
38	---> '''Policeman''' [[{{Recognition Failure}} Who are you?]] \
39	'''Spider-Man:''' ''[turns around to the audience]'' [[{{Breaking the Fourth Wall}} No one seems to grasp the concept of the mask.]]
40	** Later, as he escapes from the cops:
41	--->'''Spider-Man:''' [[Film/MidnightCowboy I'm swinging here, I'm swinging here!]]
42	** And just before that:
43	--->'''Spider-Man:''' Bus!
44	* Spidey spins a giant web in the sewer and senses the vibrations to determine the Lizard's location. How does he pass the time? By playing Brick Breaker on his cellphone.
45	* In a fight, the Lizard demands that Spider-Man get out of the hole in the wall. How does Spider-Man respond? He throws a shoe at him.
46	* The PunctuatedPounding as he tries to reason with The Lizard, who's smacking him around with his tail.
47	-->'''Spider-Man:''' Don't--''[slam]'' make me--''[slam]'' have to--''[slam]'' HURT YOU!
48	* Just after he webs the Lizard at the high school, Spidey smashes a window and grabs Gwen. After a longing look...
49	-->'''Spidey:''' I'm gonna throw you out the window now.\
50	'''Gwen:''' What?\
51	'''Spidey:''' ''[throws her, webs her]''
52	* During the fight with the Lizard at the school, after trying to talk sense into him.
53	-->'''Spider-Man:''' Alright, so you don't wanna talk?\
54	'''Lizard:''' ''[roars]''\
55	'''Spider-Man:''' ''[shoots web at Lizard's mouth]'' There you go!
56	* This line:
57	-->'''Spider-Man:''' Uh-oh. Somebody's been a bad lizard.
58	** Following this scene, he's thrown into a library with Stan Lee not even noticing the two are fighting. Notice in the background as Spider-Man is getting away from the Lizard, he's actually throwing books at him as if it'll have any effect.
59	*** [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZapELQXx9LM See for yourself.]]
60	* A subtle one at the very end. Parker comes home all beat up and Aunt May is speechless. He then reveals the eggs she's been asking for.
61	** The best part is that the eggs are still not organic. For FridgeBrilliance points, they're free range/cage free. Peter may believe they amount to the same thing.
62	* After getting injured by The Lizard then flushed down the sewage pipes:
63	-->'''Spider-Man:''' [[{{Understatement}} Oh, that]] ''[[{{Understatement}} sucked.]]''
64
65	[[AC:Gwen Stacy]]
66	* The conversation when Gwen tells Dr. Conners who Peter is.
67	-->'''Gwen:''' He's one of Midtown Science's best and brightest. He's second in his class.\
68	'''Peter:''' Second?\
69	'''Gwen:''' Yeah.\
70	'''Peter:''' You sure about that?\
71	'''Gwen:''' I'm pretty sure...
72	* [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jggeG4VCbBI Gwen tries to make an excuse to her dad for not coming out to have hot chocolate, since she's tending to Peter's wounds from battling the Lizard.]] When Captain Stacy tries to coax her out by reminding her she fantasized about living in a chocolate house ''just last week'', Gwen replies, "well that's impractical... and fattening", and Peter has this sheepish smile on his face as he muses "a chocolate house...", prompting Gwen to roll her eyes and give a disgusted face of "DontAsk". Then she opens her door again, and apologizes to her dad, blaming her outburst on a period, at which her dad backs off and leaves due to TooMuchInformation.
73	** How fast Captain Stacy picks up on it implies this might not be the first time he's seen this...
74	* Spidey's entire conversation with Gwen via phone telling her not to go to Oscorp to help stop The Lizard, and his constant flustered nature at her just disregarding everything he says.
75	** Made even better by the bystanders watching and laughing in the background.
76	** And taking photos with a cell phone.
77	--->'''Spider-Man:''' ''Connors'' is on the way. He's coming to you right now.\
78	'''Gwen:''' ''[looks at the antidote cooker thingy]'' There's eight minutes left.\
79	'''Spider-Man:''' You're gonna wait there for eight minutes after what I just told you?!\
80	''[Gwen tells Peter that she's not leaving without the antidote he sent her to cook up, and that she's evacuating everyone else, then hangs up on him]''\
81	'''Spider-Man:''' Gwen! ''Gwen!'' You Mother [[LastSecondWordSwap Hubbard]], are you serious?!
82
83	[[AC:Others]]
84	* Ben and May's reactions to Peter's BigEater state following being bitten.
85	-->'''May:''' ''[confused]'' Something is very wrong.\
86	'''Ben:''' Yeah. ''No one'' likes your meatloaf.\
87	'''May:''' ''[DeathGlare]''
88	** Even funnier, it is the exact opposite of the original trilogy when the two were concerned Peter was headed to bed without a scrap of food.
89	** And then, after Peter leaves the room:
90	--->'''May:''' Why didn't you tell me you didn't like my meatloaf?\
91	'''Ben:''' [[OhCrap Uh...]]\
92	'''May:''' You could have told me that thirty-seven years ago! ''How'' many meatloafs have I made for you?
93	* Creator/StanLee's cameo, in which he is listening to music in the school library while Spider-Man and Lizard fight in the background. Plus, Spider-Man saves his life when a table is thrown towards him by tugging it away with his webbing and he walks out of the room without ever realizing that two superhumans were fighting right behind him. One wonders how he would react when he would come back and see what happened to the library.
94	** A ''WebAnimation/HowItShouldHaveEnded'' short shows Stan ([[ParodyAssistance voicing himself!]]) in confused indignation before blaming the Avengers.
95	* While the Lizard is fighting Peter in the chemistry lab at the school, he launches Parker through the wall, leaving a dark hole. So what does the Lizard do? Follow him in? No- he uses his [[GeniusBruiser doctorate as a scientist]] and mixes two chemicals together after a quick examination and lobs the now makeshift bomb, showing that this incarnation of the Lizard isn't just a mindless giant...lizard.
96	* This bit:
97	-->'''Captain Stacy:''' You think we just sit around all day eating donuts with our thumbs planted firmly up our asses?\
98	''[a few seconds later]''
99	-->'''Gwen's Brother:''' Up your what, Dad?
100	* On the audio commentary for the DVD, Avi Arad jokes that they actually had Rhys Ifans' arm surgically removed for his role.
101	* "[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dfzh6dTVWME#t=54 ... not to be confused with his other girlfriend]] Mary-Jane Watson, who is a ''skank'' and [[{{Yandere}} doesn't love him like I do.]]"
102	* Captain Stacy has shown up to give Peter the antidote and back him up fighting the Lizard. He winds up dumping a shotgun into a mist of super cooled air that is keeping down a ''GIANT LIZARD MAN''. Is he fazed at all by this turn of events?
103	-->'''Captain Stacy:''' I got this, Peter!
104
105	!![[VideoGame/TheAmazingSpiderMan The tie-in video game]]
106	* A video game example after Spider-Man [[spoiler:breaks Connors free from the asylum]], he needed to set up a lab in [[CreatorCameo Stan's]] apartment, where Peter is house sitting. [[spoiler:Connors]] ends up using Stan's credit card to buy lab equipment.
107	-->'''Peter:''' Stan is going to kill me!! How much did you buy?\
108	[[spoiler:'''Connors:''']] Oh I don't know, I just used it until it didn't work anymore, there's just one more thing I need.\
109	'''Peter:''' Please don't say a jacuzzi.
110	** And then [[spoiler:towards the end of the game, Peter gets an angry phone call from Stan about his credit card being declined. Even funnier, is that New York is a quarantine zone with rioting at the time, and Stan's apartment was ''just'' trashed by one of Smythe's cross-species hunting mechs crashing through the wall as it hunted Peter]].
111	** Stay idle long enough in the apartment and Connors will ask if he can order a pizza using the card.
112	* Also from the video game, some of the New York Thoughts, kind of like an in-game Website/{{Twitter}}. For instance, before you fight one of Smythe's [[HumongousMecha giant robots designed to eliminate cross-species]] (read, [[OhCrap YOU]]) some of the tweets are pretty funny.
113	-->Hey! [=Any1=] feel that quake?!
114	-->I was enjoying a latte, now I got butter in my coffee! FirstWorldProblems, man...
115	-->[[NoteToSelf Memo to self]]: Save my work more often.
116	-->[[ItMakesSenseInContext River dancing in the shower?]] Done! And I don't recommend it...
117	-->Didn't feel a thing, I was on a bus. Saw people freak out, though...
118	-->Sorry, y'all! New stereo system. Still tweaking the bass. = )
119	-->[[NoodleIncident Does someone know how to uncling a cat from a ceiling?]]
120	-->Am I crazy?! I think I just saw a rhino running in the streets! Did the zoo make a statement?
121	-->[[SurroundedByIdiots Suddenly grateful to live in the suburbs...]] o_O

Context Funny / TheAmazingSpiderMan