| 1 | !! As per [[Administrivia/HandlingSpoilers site policy]], Moment pages are spoiler-free. You have been warned. |
| 2 | |
| 3 | [[quoteright:350:https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/f313a7ca_2013_45d2_80b2_03100d4e7d6a.png]] |
| 4 | [[caption-width-right:350:"Hi Figment!"]] |
| 5 | |
| 6 | WARNING: This is gonna be a long read. |
| 7 | |
| 8 | Please put all moments from other series Tony Goldmark has done in their appropriate subpages: |
| 9 | [[index]] |
| 10 | * ''Funny/EscapeFromVaultDisney'' |
| 11 | * ''Funny/OneMovieLater'' |
| 12 | [[/index]] |
| 13 | ---- |
| 14 | [[foldercontrol]] |
| 15 | |
| 16 | !![[RunningGag Running Gags]] |
| 17 | * Every time Jerk pushes someone offscreen, the sound of glass shattering can be heard. |
| 18 | * The recurring character of Michael Eisner as a Film/JamesBond villain with a German accent. |
| 19 | * Any of the game shows that Jerk does in his videos. |
| 20 | * Ketchup. |
| 21 | * The sound of a buzzer going off every time something is either crossed out or a statement, usually with red text, comes on screen. |
| 22 | * His "Previously on" and "And now back to" segments for each multi-part video. |
| 23 | * [[Series/FullHouse “Michelle! Michelle!]] [[ToBeContinued Where are you?“]] |
| 24 | * Back when the show had commercial breaks, he'd say "One of the following advertisers [[[MadLibsCatchPhrase did something terrible]]]. See if you can guess which one!" |
| 25 | |
| 26 | !!Season 1 |
| 27 | |
| 28 | [[folder:The Country Bears]] |
| 29 | * Jerk's new intro for his debut on Website/ChannelAwesome has him call it "Channel Glasses That... Awesome With a Guy... Thing... family," an allusion to the recent name change of the company. |
| 30 | * To the ChirpingCrickets response to Jerk. |
| 31 | -->'''Jerk:''' Great question, crickets! |
| 32 | * Jerk's opening monologue on the main page. |
| 33 | * "[[AffectionateParody You can't really love something unless you're willing to mock it for all its worth]]. Just look at your children." |
| 34 | * Jerk dubs Disneyland to be "the second happiest place on Harbor Boulevard." |
| 35 | -->"...next to that Swedish massage parlor down the street." |
| 36 | * Jerk's reasoning for why anyone would ride something as corny as ''Ride/CountryBearJamboree'': the line for ''Ride/SplashMountain'' was too long and visitors just wanted some air conditioning. |
| 37 | * "So the movie starts out with of footage of-'''[[JumpScare OOOOAA AAAAHHHH!!!]]'''" |
| 38 | * Before introducing Beary, he decides ScrewThisImOuttaHere to go ride Splash Mountain, then he finds out the line for Splash Mountain is two miles long. |
| 39 | * The protagonist of the film is [[ADogNamedDog a bear named Beary Barrington]], so Jerk follows that up by posing with the actual costume characters and dubbing them [[WesternAnimation/DonaldDuck Ducky Duckingham]], [[WesternAnimation/MickeyMouse Micey Mousenblatt]], and [[WesternAnimation/{{Goofy}} Zippo the Clown-faced Jerkwad]]. Even better is the reactions of the costume characters: Donald shakes his head, Mickey {{Facepalm}}s, and Goofy... either didn't notice Jerk got his name wrong, or doesn't care. |
| 40 | * The Jerk asks how far he is into the movie: |
| 41 | -->'''Woman:''' ''(off-screen)'' Four minutes!\ |
| 42 | '''Jerk:''' Great. |
| 43 | * Jerk pointing out the irony of the movie’s plot being about trying to save Country Bear Hall… when it came out a few months after the Disneyland version of the Country Bear Jamboree was closed down. |
| 44 | * "This movie has literally no right to exist! It shouldn't exist, it can't exist! And yet it does! Or does it..." (''creepy music plays, DVD box starts shaking, it hits Jerk in the face'') "Ow!" |
| 45 | * When seeing that the film has, in addition to Beary, [[ExactlyWhatItSaysOnTheTin a roadie named "Roadie", and a chicken named "Mr. Chicken"]]. |
| 46 | -->'''Jerk''': It's economical to hire children to write your children's movies 'cause you can just pay them in ''candy''! (''holds up giant lollipops'') |
| 47 | * Jerk insists he is not racist against bears, [[SomeOfMyBestFriendsAreX and even has bear friends]]. |
| 48 | -->'''Jerk''': (''posing with the characters from ''WesternAnimation/BrotherBear) ''Help me''... |
| 49 | * Jerk's guessing game RunningGag with the D-list Disney stars touted in this movie. |
| 50 | -->'''Jerk:''' Hey, look, it's Music/MandyMoore! (''buzzer'') Music/MileyCyrus! (''buzzer'') Music/AshleeSimpson! (''buzzer'') Music/VanessaHudgens! (''buzzer'') Music/DemiLovato! (''buzzer'') Music/KylieMinogue! (''buzzer'') Nelly Furtado! (''buzzer'') ...Music/ShaniaTwain? (''buzzer'') ...Bristol Palin? (''buzzer'') Umm... (Caption: ''Krystal Marie Harris'') Krystal Marie Harris! I was so... gonna know it. |
| 51 | (''later'')\ |
| 52 | '''Jerk:''' You're Music/CarrieUnderwood! (''buzzer'') Music/TaylorSwift! (''buzzer'') Music/HilaryDuff! (''buzzer'') Haylie Duff! (''buzzer'') [[Music/SpiceGirls Baby Spice]]! (''buzzer'') (Caption: ''Three Hours Later'') ...Zac {{Music/Hanson}}. (''buzzer'') [[Series/TheGoldenGirls Rue McClanahan]]. (''buzzer'') Krystal Marie Harris in a blond wig. (''buzzer'') I dunno... I should know this- (Caption: ''Jennifer Paige'') Jennifer Pai-- okay now you're just making up pop stars. |
| 53 | * After Zeb beats a rival musician in a music competition, Jerk laments that he spent $10,000 betting on the other musician. |
| 54 | -->'''Jerk''': [[CardCarryingVillain Now how can I afford to blow up that orphanage]]?! (''{{Beat}}'') Those orphans know what they did. |
| 55 | * "Meanwhile, back at the Walken -- '''OH GOD HE'S DEAD!!!''' (''Walken sits up'') [[MistakenDeathConfirmation ...oh... sorry.]]" |
| 56 | ** "Christopher Walken passes the time by [[TakeThat imitating Disneyland management]]." |
| 57 | --->'''Walken:''' ''(smashes a model of Country Bear Hall)'' [[SarcasmMode OH NO! Country Bear Hall has been crushed!]] |
| 58 | * How does Jerk summarize Tennessee O'Neal (who, as Jerk describes him, is "whiny and neurotic")? "[[Film/InglouriousBasterds Bear]] [[NWordPrivileges Jew]]". |
| 59 | -->'''Jerk:''' Thanks, [[Creator/BradPitt Brad]]. |
| 60 | * "WHEN WILL THE AUTOMAKERS LEARN?!" |
| 61 | * "Coming [[OscarBait this Oscar season]]: Christopher Walken IS UsefulNotes/JoeBiden. Rated R." |
| 62 | * Jerk admits [[NarmCharm his affection for]] Creator/ChristopherWalken's line: "[[ChewingTheScenery That day... IS TONIGHT!!]]" |
| 63 | -->'''Jerk:''' The greatest line in cinema history is in ''The Country Bears'', who knew? |
| 64 | * "Hey hundreds of people! Shut up!" |
| 65 | [[/folder]] |
| 66 | |
| 67 | |
| 68 | [[folder: Ten Years of Disney California Adventure]] |
| 69 | * The new Channel Awesome opening begins with Jerk kissing his hair, saying: "[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D3dYanzg3pw&t=0m16s Luscious locks!]]" |
| 70 | * Jerk returns ten years after California Adventure's opening, expecting to attend a huge anniversary and instead meets... a workwall. |
| 71 | ** This ties into the Channel Awesome intro: [[VictoryByEndurance "I WIN!"]] |
| 72 | * "You can't spell decade without DCA (Disney California Adventure). Or ECD (Elderly Cockroach Disease), or CAE (Charos Aborted Elephants) for that matter; it's all discussed in my two week seminar: 'How To Spell Things With Other Things', next month at the Madisson Radisson." |
| 73 | * "Yes, DCA is turning ten years old, and like most California ten year-olds it's getting [[TroublingUnchildlikeBehavior its first facelift]]." |
| 74 | * To make room for DCA, Disneyland's new parking lot became the second-largest in the world, "dwarfed only by... the Detroit airport." |
| 75 | -->'''Jerk:''' Because if I lived in Detroit I'd want to leave too! If my car was built there, it'd probably get as far as the airport [[EveryCarIsAPinto before it blew up]]. |
| 76 | * "Eisner ''really'' wanted to save up for his huge yacht to hold all his smaller yachts." |
| 77 | * Jerk's interpretation of why California Adventure was built, with then-CEO Michael Eisner as a CardCarryingVillain. |
| 78 | -->'''Michael Eisner:''' Ve vant ze tourists to schtay in ze park. Vhy do they leave ze park?\ |
| 79 | '''Disney Employee:''' Uh, well, uh, Mr. Eisner, sir, according to the market research we've done, people leave so they can explore the rest of California!\ |
| 80 | '''Michael Eisner:''' Zhen ve vill bring the rest of California ''HEEEEEEEERE!!!''\ |
| 81 | (''lightning crashes as [[WesternAnimation/TheHunchbackOfNotreDameDisney "The Bells of Notre Dame"]] plays'')\ |
| 82 | '''[[Film/YoungFrankenstein Frederick Frankenstein]]''': It! Could! Work!!! |
| 83 | * Jerk visiting the actual landmarks DCA has replicas of, just under a day's drive away. |
| 84 | -->'''Jerk''': (''at the Golden Gate Bridge'') Yeah, it's okay but, if only it had a monorail going across it. (''at the Palace of Fine Arts'') Yeah, it's semi-breathtaking but, if only it had a Creator/WhoopiGoldberg film in it. (''at entrance to Disneyland'') Yeah, it's good but, if only it sucked, then you'd have something! |
| 85 | * Jerk's imagines how the tractor "ride" must have been thought up. |
| 86 | -->'''Jerk Exec:''' (''on cellphone'') We need something big, that will really attract people. Some... huge attractor.\ |
| 87 | '''Jerk Worker:''' (''taking notes'') Huge... tractor, got it. (''finishes note and groans'') |
| 88 | * Jerk's parody of the California Adventure commercials, where, while spying on the new park, Buzz tells Goofy not to come over because "nobody likes a nosy neighbor". |
| 89 | -->'''Buzz:''' Look at that phenomenal theme park over there, let’s stay out of it!\ |
| 90 | '''Goofy:''' Why?\ |
| 91 | '''Buzz:''' Uhhhh... because they don't need us!\ |
| 92 | '''Goofy:''' They need us to promote it apparently...\ |
| 93 | '''Buzz:''' Nah, they'll be alright, they have a tractor!\ |
| 94 | '''Goofy:''' I thought I was supposed to be the idiot...\ |
| 95 | '''Buzz:''' Look, let's just see how they do without us, and then-- ''(cut to an promotional image of Epcot)'' [[HistoryRepeats Oh, yeah, they're doomed.]] Alright, move 'em out, let's go. |
| 96 | * When Some Jerk talks about the special being hosted by Barry Bostwick and Richard Kind, he plays clips of "asshole" and "slut" from a ''Film/TheRockyHorrorPictureShow'' [[AudienceParticipation screening]] in an ActorAllusion to the former. |
| 97 | ** Jerk also refers to Colin Mochrie and Brad Sherwood of ''Series/WhoseLineIsItAnyway'' as "Not Wayne Brady" and "Not Wayne Brady II: The Legend of Curly’s Gold" |
| 98 | * ''Is It Still There?''. All of it. |
| 99 | ** The show is introduced as "[[BlatantLies America's only game show]]", hosted by Jerk, starring Jerk, and with the two contestants Jerk and Jerk. |
| 100 | ** Both Jerks fail the first two questions so the final question is worth 100 points, "rendering this entire exercise meaningless." |
| 101 | ** "Uh, who buzzed in? Jerk or Jerk?" "It was Jerk." |
| 102 | ** The show ends with both of them losing and being shipped away for medical experiments. |
| 103 | * The dramatic music leading up to the park's central monument... |
| 104 | -->'''Jerk:''' A big ol' hubcap that looks almost exactly nothing like the sun. (''gets up close to camera'') It's like you wanna fail. |
| 105 | ** Later on, Jerk shows off the now-improved Ferris Wheel sun. |
| 106 | --->'''Jerk:''' It's the exact same ride, but now Mickey's on it! Hi Mickey! (''waves'') He never waves back. |
| 107 | * Due to the parks failure, Jerk likens the park to an annoying neighbor that just won't move away. |
| 108 | -->'''Jerk:''' Sure, he's got a cool flight simulator in his basement, but then you gotta talk to the guy. And he's boring. |
| 109 | * "Hey, kids, come down to Paradise Pier and be jostled around a lot!" |
| 110 | * [[CaptionHumor Don't worry parents! We've got booze!]] |
| 111 | * Jerk's extremely positive "complaints" about California Screamin'. |
| 112 | -->'''Jerk:''' There's no story so it's no good! Hmph! |
| 113 | * Jerk describes California Adventure as "[[Series/TheBradyBunch the Jan Brady of theme parks]], the [[Music/SimonAndGarfunkel Art Garfunkel of theme parks]], the [[ShapedLikeItself Disney California Adventure of theme parks]]..." |
| 114 | * After seeing the amazingness of Tokyo [=DisneySea=]. |
| 115 | -->'''Jerk:''' ...the Japanese beat us at something that combines technology with artistry?! How is that even possible?! We're way smarter than the- well, no. Our cartoons are way better- well no. Our sexual perversions- (''sighs'') We're taller! That's right! We! Are taller! Than them! USA! USA! USA- I'm gonna go get drunk... |
| 116 | * After introducing the very boring rides of "A Bug's Land". |
| 117 | -->'''Jerk:''' IT'S TOO EXCITING, I CAN'T STAND IT. |
| 118 | * When discussing ''{{WesternAnimation/Aladdin}}: The Musical''. |
| 119 | -->'''Jerk:''' Apparently ''Aladdin'' was in California the whole time! (Caption: ''"When cameling on the I-5, visit beautiful Agrabah, CA."'') Well, that does explain the customer service. (''Clip of Jasmine about to get her hand chopped off for not paying for an apple.'') |
| 120 | * "But even with ''three new things'', DCA wasn't quite a match for ''the greatest thing of all time''." |
| 121 | * "''You saw nothing.'' ([[Film/MenInBlack Neuralyzer flash]]'') "[[Film/TheWizard Cawwifornia]]." |
| 122 | * "Disney finally traded in the ESN in Eisner's name for [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bob_Iger a G]]." |
| 123 | * The talking Mr. Potatohead. |
| 124 | -->'''Jerk:''' (''whispering'') It's a ''real'' potato. We genetically mutated it. It's gonna kill us all sometime in the next five years. Shhh! |
| 125 | ** Later: |
| 126 | --->'''Mr. Potato Head:''' Let's try that again: "I love you, Mr. Potatohead!"\ |
| 127 | '''Kids:''' I love you Mr. Potatohead!\ |
| 128 | '''Jerk:''' ''It demands your worship.'' |
| 129 | * "By 2012, [[MayanDoomsday assuming the Mayans were wrong and this doesn't happen...]]" (''Earth explodes'') |
| 130 | * "A workwall means progress, a workwall means the future, a workwall means: 'come back and give us more of your hard-earned money next year.' [[BackhandedCompliment And what could possibly be more Californian than that]]?" |
| 131 | [[/folder]] |
| 132 | |
| 133 | [[folder: Star Tours (The Original 1987 Classic)]] |
| 134 | * SJWAC's reaction to the OpeningScroll at the beginning. |
| 135 | -->'''SJWAC:''' Why are these words all backwards? ''({{beat}})'' Damn, kids. |
| 136 | * The conversation between the ''Franchise/StarWars'' [[WarReenactors re-enacters]]. |
| 137 | -->'''Re-Enactor:''' Wait, you're FOR blowing up planets?\ |
| 138 | '''SJWAC:''' ''(defensively)'' I happen to think it looks cool. |
| 139 | * [[WebVideo/TheIdiotsLantern The Wire]], [[WebVideo/RBGProductions Spazzmaster]], and SJWAC's conversation about Some Jerk remaining "cautiously optimistic" about the new ''Star Tours''. |
| 140 | -->'''Jerk:''' And now only this gift shop remains, until June 3rd when the new ride opens. But for better or worse it'll never be quite the same. Despite all our prays, the deal has been altered further. And I gotta tell ya. [[PunctuatedForEmphasis I. Am.]] [[BaitAndSwitch Cautiously optimistic]].\ |
| 141 | '''The Wire and Spazzmaster:''' ''What?!''\ |
| 142 | '''Jerk:''' I know, I'm surprised too, but I am cautiously optimistic.\ |
| 143 | '''Spazzmaster:''' Jerk, what is wrong with you?\ |
| 144 | '''The Wire:''' HE'S A WITCH.\ |
| 145 | '''Jerk:''' Look, I'm sorry, but even after [[TheScrappy Jar-Jar]] and Greedo and Jake Lloyd and Hayden Christensen and Jar-Jar and Boss Nass and the rat tail and the midi-chlorians and Jar-Jar and all the [=CGI=] and [[RunningGag Jar-Jar and Jar-Jar and Jar-Jar]] and the eternal Creator/CSpan footage and that stupid fucking monologue about sand and all that [[Creator/PattonOswalt "you get to see him as a little kid"]] bullshit. And even after ''(plays the clip of [[{{Narm}} Darth Vader going]] [[BigNo "NOOooOOOoooOOOooo!"]])'', ''(shrugs)'' I still remain cautiously optimistic. Sorry.\ |
| 146 | '''The Wire:''' Jerk, your friends are all here. So why don't you show us on the Ewok where ''Star Wars'' touched you?\ |
| 147 | '''Jerk:''' ''(takes the Ewok toy)'' Look, I already told you, [[NotIfTheyEnjoyedItRationalization I must have been asking for it]]! |
| 148 | * One word: Ketchup. |
| 149 | [[/folder]] |
| 150 | |
| 151 | [[folder: Top 11 Florida Attractions Not in California]] |
| 152 | * The Jerk calls Florida a "dong-shaped [[NWordPrivileges Jew cemetery]]." |
| 153 | * Jerk's intro music for a video about Florida is "Enormous Penis" by Da Vinci's Notebook. |
| 154 | * [[WebVideo/TheBunnyPerspective Phil Buni]]'s [[RunningGag rants]] about Florida and Floridians. |
| 155 | * The Jerk gets photobombed and stops his show just to incite his viewers to hunt, torture, and kill the photobomber. While several people are photobombimg in the background during his pseudo-{{PSA}}. |
| 156 | * The new Channel Awesome outro has an IronicEcho to the original footage when Jerk reveals that Maelstrom, one of his prior choices, has closed to be replaced by a ''Franchise/{{Frozen}}'' ride: |
| 157 | -->'''Anti-Ranting Jerk:''' [[HilariousInHindsight Let. It. Go.]] |
| 158 | [[/folder]] |
| 159 | |
| 160 | [[folder: Captain EO]] |
| 161 | * The new intro he added at the beginning, where he calls ''Captain EO'' [[OverlyNarrowSuperlative the greatest short film that Michael Jackson, George Lucas, and Francis Ford Coppola ever collaborated on for the Disney parks.]] |
| 162 | * The Jerk's idea of what happened to Captain EO after the movie. He is tried in Galactic Superior Court where he is found guilty of insubordination. He and his [[Music/JanetJackson sister]] (who is being punished for [[WardrobeMalfunction showing her nipple]]) are put on a [[https://youtu.be/0P4A1K4lXDo colorless spaceship]] and sent to a deserted planet where they [[AdamAndEvePlot populate the world]]. And the descendants of their [[VillainousIncest unholy]] [[BrotherSisterIncest incestuous]] union still live on that planet today. And that planet is called...'''[[EarthAllAlong EARTH!!!]]''' |
| 163 | * From the Channel Awesome intro: |
| 164 | -->'''SJWAC:''' CAPTAIN EO IS STARLORD'S REAL FATHER! Fess up, Kevin Feige, I figured it all out, didn't I!? |
| 165 | ** Later. |
| 166 | --->'''SJWAC:''' C'mon, at least he's gotta be Groot's real father! (Cue baby Groot dancing to Michael Jackson) |
| 167 | * The ''utterly bizarre'' montage that plays after Captain Eo flies. |
| 168 | * How he discusses the fact that Michael Jackson's real-life child molestation accusations makes the whole show HarsherInHindsight. He invents a new show to replace it starring Creator/CharlieSheen, Creator/MelGibson, and Tiger Woods, produced by Casey Anthony, and directed by Creator/RomanPolanski, with music by UsefulNotes/OsamaBinLaden. |
| 169 | [[/folder]] |
| 170 | |
| 171 | [[folder: Halloween Time at Disneyland]] |
| 172 | * Jerk gathers his friends together to try and come up with a Halloween version of his show's name. After Spazzmaster refuses to help, Jerk [[EurekaMoment comes up]] with an appropriate Halloween name: [[TakeThat Spazzmaster Has No Penis]]. |
| 173 | * Some Jerk describing how ''not'' scary Disney is at Halloween time. |
| 174 | -->'''SJWAC:''' What kid with healthy imagination wouldn't get psyched over "Mickey's Not-so-Scary Halloween Party"?\ |
| 175 | ''(in black and white, dramatic music plays)''\ |
| 176 | '''SJWAC:''' It wasn't just scary, kids. I can handle scary. It was not so scary. ''[[DramaticThunder (thunder strikes)]]'' I'm sorry, it's not an easy thing to relive. I think I might have [=PNSO=], Post-Non-Traumatic Stress Order from just how not-so-scary it was. It was so not-so-scary that just remembering it is enough to drive even the toughest man sane. ''[[LaughingMad (giggling maniacally)]]'' I'm sorry, I was thinking of something really funny Creator/CraigFerguson said last week. ''(in a demonic voice)'' But I digress. ''(whispering)'' It was not-so-scary, kids. It was not-so-scary.\ |
| 177 | '''Rosenhacker:''' So how much fun do you think I would have had?\ |
| 178 | '''SJWAC:''' Not much.\ |
| 179 | '''Rosenhacker:''' Yay? |
| 180 | * Ironically, Jerk gets a massive shock before the tram reaches the park: |
| 181 | --> '''Jerk:''' As early as the tram ride from the parking garage, they show you tableaus of ''[[SuddenlyShouting OH MY GOD, MICKEY AND MINNIE ARE DEAD!]]'' BELOVED CHILDREN’S ICON MICKEY MOUSE IS A LIFELESS GHOST FORCED TO WANDER THE EARTH IN LIMBO FOR ALL ETERNITY, AND SO IS HIS GIRLFRIEND WITH THE SAME LAST NAME, which is weird. Was it ''murder?!'' I suspect the ghost of Creator/GeorgeCarlin!\ |
| 182 | '''George Carlin:''' I hope Mickey dies! I do, I hope he goddamn dies! I hope he gets a hold of some tainted cheese!\ |
| 183 | '''Jerk:''' Well, now that the mice are dead, I guess Donald Duck is the new head of Disney. ([[Main/{{Beat}} beat]]) Good luck at the next stockholder meeting!\ |
| 184 | ''[cut to a room of investors listening to Donald blathering gibberish… before he starts shooting wildly]]''\ |
| 185 | '''[[SpinningPaper DISNEY STOCK PLUMMETS; Murderous Duck Blames Recession]]''' |
| 186 | * While talking about ''Space Mountain: Ghost Galaxy'', Jerk trying to figure out what the galaxy ghost is. |
| 187 | -->'''SJWAC:''' All they change about the ride is the music, the lighting, and the projections and it feels like a totally different experience in which you get chased through the cosmos by... this thing, a fiery vengeful spirit demon ghost thing with... Can I get some help on this one from a ghost expert?\ |
| 188 | '''[[Film/{{Ghostbusters 1984}} Ray Stantz]]:''' What you have there is what we refer to as a focused non-terminal repeating phantasm.\ |
| 189 | '''SJWAC:''' No, I meant a real ghost expert.\ |
| 190 | '''[[StealthPun "Real"]] [[WesternAnimation/TheRealGhostbusters Egon Spengler]]:''' They shouldn't have the energy for roving attacks.\ |
| 191 | '''SJWAC:''' No, I meant a non-fictional ghost expert. Just anyone with a basic cable show.\ |
| 192 | '''Creator/ConanOBrien:''' WesternAnimation/{{Space Ghost| Coast to Coast}} is obviously a space man who died and became a space ghost.\ |
| 193 | '''WesternAnimation/{{Space Ghost| Coast to Coast}}:''' No.\ |
| 194 | '''Conan O'Brien:''' [[LargeHam FACE IT, SPACE GHOST!]]\ |
| 195 | '''Space Ghost:''' No.\ |
| 196 | '''Conan O'Brien:''' [[LargeHam YOU'RE A SPACE MAN THAT CHOKED ON A MUFFIN!]] |
| 197 | * His parody of "[[WesternAnimation/TheNightmareBeforeChristmas What's This]]" during the review of "Haunted Mansion Holiday", ultimately ending with "WHAT [[PrecisionFStrike THE FUCK]] IS THIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIS??!!" |
| 198 | * [[BigLippedAlligatorMoment The Splash Mountain song.]] |
| 199 | * "Wow, this might actually be a one-part episode if I can [[LampshadeHanging keep my]] [[SelfDeprecation hilarious digressions]] [[TemptingFate to a minimum.]] Speaking of which, [[HypocriticalHumor I read the most fascinating]] [[ForgottenAesop article on Lithuania the other day.]] It seems..." |
| 200 | [[/folder]] |
| 201 | |
| 202 | [[folder: It's Small World Holiday]] |
| 203 | * '''[[BlackComedyRape "I WAS RAPED BY IT'S A SMALL WORLD!"]]''' |
| 204 | ** Followed by several reviewers staring in StunnedSilence...and [[Creator/CountJackula one guy]] [[CrossesTheLineTwice laughing his head off.]] |
| 205 | * To the tune of [[Film/MaryPoppins Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious]]: "Donald Duck brand Orange Juice: It tastes like rancid goat piss!" |
| 206 | ** And before that: |
| 207 | --->'''[[WesternAnimation/ToyStory3 Andy]]:''' Now, Woody...he's been my pal for as long as I can remem--\ |
| 208 | ''Caption''': '''[[MoodWhiplash By the way,]] [[JumpScare G-FORCE SUCKED.]] [[SelfDeprecation Sincerely, The Filmmakers.]]'''\ |
| 209 | '''Andy:''' --never give up on you. Ever. |
| 210 | * Wanna know how much Jerk wants to suppress [[EarWorm the song?]] If you listen carefully when he's talking about how ''WesternAnimation/{{The Lion King|1994}}'' made fun of it, you can actually hear him replace Zazu singing "It's a Small World" with Jerk (as Zazu) singing [[Music/TalkingHeads "Psycho Killer"]], just like he promised he'd do every time he cut to a clip with the song. |
| 211 | * The Jerk's "Small World" parody song, which he uses to defeat the ride. |
| 212 | * He introduces a whole list of guest stars for the multi-part review. It starts out normal, featuring people who have either already appeared in the review but then it starts getting silly with a guy eating a sandwich listed as "President Gerald Ford", a guy doing backflips as "Big Skip [=McJimmy=], The Wacky Abortionist", a cat falling off a table as "Former President of Chad Hissène Habré", and Texas Gov. Rick Perry as "[=Dickery Douche McDerpHitler=]", culminating with "[[Music/WeirdAlYankovic Weird Al Yankasomething!]]" (credited as Wordd Efl Yarnkkelvllit.chy). Hilariously enough, Weird Al actually appears in the review! |
| 213 | [[/folder]] |
| 214 | |
| 215 | !!Season 2 |
| 216 | |
| 217 | [[folder: Star Tours: The Adventure Continues]] |
| 218 | * According to the All-Being, there are alternate dimensions that have no war but [[NWordPrivileges Jews aren't allowed there.]] Apparently Creator/MelGibson was right. |
| 219 | * "Thirty-seven. She has thirty-seven hopes." "In a row?" |
| 220 | * The educational video about re-rideability. "That's right, boy in ocean!" |
| 221 | * When Jerk declares all the Presidents libertarians [[note]]When C-3PO says that everyone on the ship has joined the Rebel alliance, Jerk points out that apparently he can draft a ship full of random strangers into the same political party.[[/note]], we get a SpinningPaper that says "NO GOVERNMENT EVER! Poor forced to eat each other!" |
| 222 | [[/folder]] |
| 223 | |
| 224 | [[folder: Thirty Years of EPCOT]] |
| 225 | * The Jerk goes to check out the new WesternAnimation/{{The Little Mermaid|1989}} ride only to be entrapped by [[Series/ToCatchAPredator Chris Hansen]] (played by [[WebVideo/WhatWeHadToWatch Il Neige]]), who took his remarks out of context and [[MistakenForPedophile mistook him for trying to molest a teenage mermaid.]] |
| 226 | * The Jerk compares EPCOT to an STD: A wonderful burst of output followed by a lifetime of painful regret. |
| 227 | ** Which is followed by the next talking point being musically accompanied by [[Film/TeamAmericaWorldPolice "Everyone Has AIDS"]]. |
| 228 | * "Having already conquered the worlds of film, television and tourism, Walt’s next step, seemingly, was to flat out TakeOverTheWorld." |
| 229 | --> '''[[WesternAnimation/SnowWhiteAndTheSevenDwarfs The Evil Queen]]''': [[Film/StreetFighter OF COURSE!]] |
| 230 | * The Jerk wonders why [[UsefulNotes/WorldWarII Germany, Italy, and Japan]] didn't get pavilions at EPCOT. He then uses his powers as a "Jewish controller of the media" to demand a Germany-themed ride. Cut to him getting [[DoesThisRemindYouOfAnything onboard a train,]] saying, "If you [[JewishComplaining kvetch]] long enough, things will happen to you!" |
| 231 | ** Even funnier is the better version of the joke he says he should have used in the commentary: "If you [[JewishComplaining kvetch]] long enough, you will find a [[DeadlyEuphemism final solution]]!" |
| 232 | * Jerk throws his Uncle Paul off a cliff to save the environment, because that worked for [[WesternAnimation/TheLionKing1994 Simba]]. |
| 233 | * The Jerk tries to riff ''Ride/EllensEnergyAdventure'' only to find that Ellen has already thought of all his jokes. But he finally gets a victory when he realizes the caveman who makes "an important discovery" is played by Michael Richards. "He discovered [[NWordPrivileges the racial epithet!]]" Cue cheesy music and goofy dance. |
| 234 | * The RunningGag in which Jerk (and Phil Buni at one point) mentions a race of Bolivian mice genetically engineered by Disney to crawl inside the human brain before [[WeAreExperiencingTechnicalDifficulties getting cut off]] for "cranial remodulocation." |
| 235 | ** And a bit of FridgeLogic in TheStinger when Phil goes on to say "As not a human, that doesn't really bother me so much." ({{beat}}) "Death to the humans!" |
| 236 | * "Previously on '''[[MindScrew ACID]]!'''" |
| 237 | ** "And now, you find yourself in ‘82." |
| 238 | * "So let's review. EPCOT was a failed Experiment. It wasn't really a Prototype of anything 'cause they never built another one. It wasn't a Community 'cause nobody lived there. And it didn't magically transport you to Tomorrow unless you fell asleep on Universe of Energy (which was quite likely). It was barely even Of." |
| 239 | * "If Spaceship Earth was a golf ball, you'd need a forty-four hundred foot club, and a seven-hundred foot dancing gopher! I gladly volunteer my services." And then there's the dance he does... |
| 240 | [[/folder]] |
| 241 | |
| 242 | [[folder: ABC Goes to Disney World!]] |
| 243 | * "Luscious locks" makes a return into the Channel Awesome new intro, now referring to literal door locks. |
| 244 | * "Remember the 1990s? That magical decade where Music/KurtCobain [[WesternAnimation/TheLionKing1994 became king of Pride Rock]], UsefulNotes/BillClinton had an affair with [[Film/JurassicPark a Velociraptor]], and Creator/QuentinTarantino [[Recap/TheSimpsonsS7E4BartSellsHisSoul sold Bart Simpson's soul for pogs]] in the Wicked-Wicked-Film/WildWildWest?" |
| 245 | * "I devoted an entire introductory episode just to explaining the concept, which I literally just explained in- ''[[HongKongDub seventy-one]]" -seconds. [...] Endure!" |
| 246 | * Jerk's depicts the ABC laugh track audiences as being so brainwashed as to laugh at everything, including [[Series/FullHouse Michelle Tanner saying cutesy snarks]], "That's a lotta fish" from ''{{Film/Godzilla 1998}}'', and even ''Simba finding his father dead'' from ''WesternAnimation/{{The Lion King|1994}}''. Bonus points in that the shot of the audience laughing at the last scene includes [[SelfDeprecation Jerk himself laughing in the crowd]]. |
| 247 | * Jerk parodies Walt Disney's early "infomercial" documentaries about the building of Disneyland with an informercial of his own. |
| 248 | -->'''[[WebVideo/RBGProductions Spazz!Narrator]]''': Tired of the tired of thrillful drudgeries of ''rollercoasters''? |
| 249 | -->'''[[WebVideo/TheIdiotsLantern The Wire]]''': There's got to be a better way! |
| 250 | -->'''Spazz!Narrator''': Introducing Disneylandia, a coaster-free experience guaranteed to enhance your life. |
| 251 | -->'''[[WebVideo/WhatWeHadToWatch Il Neige]]''': Wait-wait-wait, so are you telling me an amusement park could actually enhance my life? |
| 252 | -->'''Jerk''': Who are you? |
| 253 | -->'''Spazz!Narrator''': I'm ''over here''. |
| 254 | -->'''[[WebVideo/WhatWeHadToWatch Il Neige]]''': (''turns around'') Wait-wait-wait, so are you telling me an amusement park could actually enhance my life? |
| 255 | -->'''Spazz!Narrator''': Why, just listen to these convincing testimonies. |
| 256 | -->'''Rosenhacker''': Thanks to Disneylandia, I learned to believe in everything! |
| 257 | -->'''Mike Eddy''': [[TheStoic I learned how to be happy and smile more]]. |
| 258 | -->'''Spazz!Narrator''': I learned exactly why God kills people! |
| 259 | -->'''Jerk''': ...what's a Disneylandia- |
| 260 | -->'''All''': Thanks, Disneylandia!!! |
| 261 | * "And The Mouse had very little to do with ABC until the 1980s, when a former ABC senior vice president named *picture of Michael Eisner is displayed* 'Oh God, him again' became the new CEO of Disney." |
| 262 | * When Eisner and Mickey ride the Sky Tram. |
| 263 | -->'''Jerk''': "Oh crap, the skyline's stuck again. Can someone get them down before one of them eats the other? If Mickey finds out how good Jews taste, we're all doomed. ({{beat}}) Oh, too late. So, who wants to let me [[Literature/TheDiaryOfAYoungGirl live in their attic?]]" (''LaughTrack'') |
| 264 | * Jerk's most meta gag yet: After the fake commercial is over, he wipes the [[MonochromeToColor grainy film off the screen]] and shoves the [[AspectRatioSwitch letterbox aside with his elbows]]. |
| 265 | * Jerk's ABC theme show parody, which plays a dozen theme songs simultaneously in an inaudible cacophony, stars him as every character, keeps going well after it should have ended, and results in him trying to escape it, to the point that he shoots him, nukes his city, and then ''is car-chased by it live on the Golden Gate Bridge''. In fact, it ends up resembling [[Film/TooManyCooks a certain show openings parody]] [[HilariousInHindsight that debuted a year later]]... |
| 266 | ** "[[CaptionHumor Edited by Tony Goldmark and Tony Goldmark's Illegal Download of Adobe Premiere]]. Format Ripped Off From Creator/DougWalker and [[http://jimhillmedia.com/ Jim Hill]]." |
| 267 | * Jerk's ''Film/EscapeFromTomorrow'' parody. |
| 268 | * Jerk attempts to pass himself off as [[ElvisLives Elvis back from the dead]], now in the "[[BlatantLies lucrative field of Internet reviewing]]". |
| 269 | -->'''Jerk!Elvis''': (''GlassesPull'') You know, ''they don't shoot me below the waist neither''. (''Dances to "Jailhouse Rock"'') |
| 270 | ** Later: |
| 271 | -->'''Jerk''': They kicked me out for my Elvis dance, the bloody Philistines. Also I drunkenly urinated on the Walt statue. Also it's a block-out day. |
| 272 | -->'''The Wire''': Well that's just what you get for using the front gate like a sucker! (''{{Beat}}'') Disney cops. Gotta run! |
| 273 | * Jerk notes the laugh tracks still playing during the Disney World episodes, and wonders if the audiences were forced to tag along to laugh at the characters. |
| 274 | -->'''Jerk''': (''canned laughter) Can we go ride rides now? |
| 275 | -->'''ABC Exec''': NO! We're paying you to laugh, not to have fun! |
| 276 | * "Can you imagine having Disney World being advertised at you this incessantly? Even without other sh-" (''[[SelfDeprecation Cut to Blip Disney World midroll ad]], before [[StuffBlowingUp Jerk blows it up]] with the TNT from Toontoon.'') |
| 277 | * After [[ItMakesSenseInContext Jerk gets trapped inside a TV]], he only has to mention the Disney World episode of ''Full House'' before [[SweetnessAversion the TV vomits him out]]. |
| 278 | [[/folder]] |
| 279 | |
| 280 | [[folder: Full House Goes to Disney World!]] |
| 281 | * The title card illustration for the review: With a camera set up, a mic, a light commanding laughter, the little Olsen twins smiling in an eerie manner, a sweaty smiling zombie like Danny, a sweaty smiling zombie like Uncle Joey holding a hand puppet, a sweaty looking Jerk, and Uncle Jesse looking sweaty and bright-eyed. |
| 282 | * The "memorial" card before the review: |
| 283 | --> This video is dedicated to all the men and women who were tragically killed or injured in the Disneyland dry ice bombing of May 28, 2013. All zero of them. Never forget. |
| 284 | * A running gag of Bob Saget's extremely blue and family-unfriendly stand-up routines, including the one where he implies he had sex with the Olsen twins while on the set of ''Full House.'' |
| 285 | * Calling Uncle Jesse ComicBook/{{Mystique}}'s ex-husband. |
| 286 | * Mocking Aunt Becky for asking if [[CantHaveSexEver they get to]] [[SleepingSingle be together in the honeymoon suite]]. |
| 287 | --> '''Jerk:''' Nope all Disney Honeymoon suites are in separate rooms. Just in case a monorail crashes through the wall due to gross incompetence, we wouldn't want the kids to see what you're doing, now would we, kids? ''(cuts to a room full of bored children)'' We wouldn't want to see the lurid, sexual kinds of deviancy I'm about to describe to you in graphic detail now would we? You see kids, when a Mommy and a Daddy, and another Mommy and a coconut love Kahlua very, very much.... |
| 288 | * Jerk trying not to comment on [[BlackComedy Michelle]] claiming [[AccidentalInnuendo she gags]] if she doesn't sit next to the window seat. |
| 289 | ** Jerk rejoicing in Creator/BobSaget slightly making a passive-agressive quip. |
| 290 | * Cutting to clips of Tea Party demonstrations when Michelle suggested a tea party with the Disney characters. |
| 291 | * Poking fun at how the characters split into subplots. |
| 292 | -->"They'll never find me here." |
| 293 | * Making Music/AlanisMorissette references about Uncle Joey. |
| 294 | * Voiceovers done for Chip and Dale poking fun at Aunt Becky and Uncle Jesse's anniversary lunch date being missed, at Becky for thinking [[TemptingFate Jesse would ne]][[BumblingDad ver forget their date]] and at Jesse for divorcing Mystique. (They also imply they banged Aunt Becky.) |
| 295 | -->"This is why the [[WesternAnimation/ChipNDaleRescueRangers Rescue Rangers]] broke up!" |
| 296 | * FUN FACT: This man was talking to chipmunks less than a minute ago. |
| 297 | * Poking fun at Uncle Joey getting high while cartooning. |
| 298 | ** "I finally cracked! AWESOME!" |
| 299 | ** "I see you've found the peyote. Leave at least a little for Katzenberg, will ya?" |
| 300 | * Jerk calls Child Services for the Tanners not taking the girls to Disneyland (despite not hurting for money and living in California). |
| 301 | ** He's put on hold. |
| 302 | *** And the hold song is {{Music/Nirvana}}'s "Rape Me". |
| 303 | * The ''WesternAnimation/{{Aladdin}}'' references and calling them out for missing a chance to make a joke that breaks the fourth wall by having Steve only appear as Aladdin. |
| 304 | --> ''Series/FullHouse''. We're too lazy for lazy. |
| 305 | * Pointing out the unintended side effects of having a kid make any wish they want (world domination, a trillion dollars, and making Eisner eat his beloved cat). |
| 306 | --> And thus began the horrifying, bloodthirsty reign of Ol-sen the Inspid! |
| 307 | * "Sic Semper Tyrannus, Bitch!" |
| 308 | * All the dark comedy jokes about the older girls plotting to kill Michelle and one where Michelle wanders off, with voiceovers by Jerk. |
| 309 | -->'''D.J:''' Conference. |
| 310 | -->'''Jerk! As D.J.:''' Let's leave our six year old sister completely unattended in public so we can discuss how we're going to kill her. I say we take her out in Great Moments with Mr. Lincoln for maximum irony! |
| 311 | -->'''Jerk! As Stephanie:''' They don't have that here. |
| 312 | -->'''Jerk! As D.J.:''' You're kidding. |
| 313 | -->'''Jerk! As Stephanie:''' No, all they have is the Hall of Presidents. Bitch will probably make us do that 20 times. |
| 314 | -->'''Jerk! As Kimmy:''' Look, we've discussed this before, no matter how many Olsen Twins you kill, they'll just keep regenerating. You have to find the head Olsen twin and impale her with a broadsword. |
| 315 | -->'''Jerk! As Stephanie:''' Awww, all I brought was two scimitars and a dagger. I brought them through security because 9/11 hasn't happened yet. |
| 316 | -->'''Jerk! As D.J.:''' What's 9/11? |
| 317 | -->'''Jerk! As Stephanie:''' I don't know. |
| 318 | ** Later |
| 319 | -->'''Jerk! As Michelle:''' La la la! I like candy! And I trust everyone! La la la! |
| 320 | * Making fun of Stephanie's feelings being trivialized. |
| 321 | -->'''Jerk:''' Do you trivialize Social Issues too? |
| 322 | -->'''Jerk! As Stephanie:''' It's just not fair that we don't have marriage equality. |
| 323 | -->'''Jerk! As Uncle Joey:''' [[HeteronormativeCrusader Well if you let a man marry another man, what's to stop a man from marrying two hermaphrodites and a fish?]] Or a [[InsaneTrollLogic triceratops from marrying an aborted fetus]]? From [[StayInTheKitchen a woman from]] [[OldMaid not marrying at all?]] Sooner or later Steph, you might just wish you ''did'' kill your sister. |
| 324 | -->'''Jerk! As Stephanie:''' [[FlatWhat What?]] |
| 325 | -->'''Jerk! As Uncle Joey:''' [[CloudCuckoolander I talked to a cartoon today.]] |
| 326 | -->'''Jerk! As Stephanie:''' Great! Go bug him. |
| 327 | * Finally Michelle stops acting like, quote, "a selfish twat this week" and passes the crown to Stephanie. |
| 328 | -->'''Michelle:''' I'm defecting to SeaWorld while the revolution attacks you! |
| 329 | * Jesse and the Rippers take the Castle stage! |
| 330 | -->'''Jerk:''' It's like watching Pat Boone and Michael Bolton playing hockey in a vat of whipped cream and rice! It's so white...it's blinding me!!!!!!!! |
| 331 | * Jerk's rant about this episode. |
| 332 | -->'''Uncle Joey:''' Yes San Francisco and live from Disney World... |
| 333 | -->'''Jerk:''' Are you even listening to yourself? Why are you broadcasting across the damned country? Why is Snow White a deejay? Why is your booth promoting a radio station you can't even get there? Why are there characters in the crowd? How the fuck are those fireworks so legible? How the shit are either of you eligible for a contest if your Uncle's been hired to perform there? ''(sees Uncle Joey dance with Snow White)'' Why in the name of Jehovah is any of this happening!?!? |
| 334 | -->'''[[Film/{{Dogma}} Metatron]]:''' I believe the answers that you seek lie within my companion. |
| 335 | --> ''(Jerk looks horrified while Music/AlanisMorissette gets Uncle Joey's and Snow White's heads exploding while singing "You Oughta Know")'' |
| 336 | -->'''Jerk:''' Okay! Okay! I get it! Luckily my hair is so long I couldn't hear that. |
| 337 | * Jerk screaming when he sees [[Series/FamilyMatters Steve Urkel]] and the beginning of the stinger for this and all the multi-part reviews to come: |
| 338 | --> To be continued... |
| 339 | -->'''Girls:''' Michelle? Michelle, where are you? |
| 340 | * Jerk telling Music/OliviaWilde that having his baby won't solve anything and then yelling "How is ''Film/TronLegacy'' my fault?" |
| 341 | * The credits rolling with [[Music/WeirdAlYankovic Weird Al Yankovic's]] polka of "You Oughta Know". |
| 342 | [[/folder]] |
| 343 | |
| 344 | [[folder: Family Matters Goes to Disney World!]] |
| 345 | * The title card with Jerk on a log for Splash Mountain stopping to drown Steve while a box of Urkel-Os floats by. |
| 346 | * Jerk's [[TheReasonYouSuckSpeech rant about Urkel]]. |
| 347 | -->'''Jerk:''' (regarding Urkel's catchphrase) Of course you're the one who fucking did that! You're the most that-doing motherfucker in the multiverse! |
| 348 | * Upon revealing that Urkel got a girlfriend by the sixth season, Jerk is given a note stating that [[RefugeInAudacity half of the audience for the video]] [[DrivenToSuicide killed themselves in response...]] [[CrossesTheLineTwice which prompts Jerk to wonder what the]] ''[[CrossesTheLineTwice other]]'' [[CrossesTheLineTwice half is waiting for.]] |
| 349 | -->'''Jerk''': '''''[[DespairEventHorizon URKEL HAD A GIRLFRIEND, HOPE IS DEAD!]]''''' |
| 350 | * [[IAmNotShazam Calling the Winslow family the Matters.]] |
| 351 | * His insert of [[Series/SaturdayNightLive Stefan]] when Laura mentions Stefan Urquelle. |
| 352 | * His rant about how ''Series/FamilyMatters'' is a nerd minstrel show and how real nerds aren't this clumsy. He and Conspiracy Guy then do the same clumsy antics Urkel did. |
| 353 | -->'''Conspiracy Guy''' ''[throwing his paper in the air]'': FIND ME A GIRLFRIEND, YOU STUPID PAPER! |
| 354 | * His reaction to the camera zooming in at Carl: |
| 355 | -->'''Jerk:''' Oh my God! He's getting bigger! |
| 356 | * All the ''Franchise/DieHard'' clips used when involving Carl, even after Richie makes a snarky comment, followed by the sound of a gunshot before cutting to Al Powell (Reginald VelJohnson's character in ''Franchise/DieHard'') talking about how he shot a kid. |
| 357 | -->'''Jerk (As Powell):''' Luckily, it turns out that's not illegal in Florida. |
| 358 | * "This November, Steven Urkel becomes [[Film/TheNuttyProfessor1996 Buddy Love]]...I mean Stefan Urquelle." |
| 359 | * Even pointing out Carl being an UngratefulBastard after talking about how no Steve in Disney World is great, despite "The bastard taking me to Disney World!" |
| 360 | * Cinderella seating Laura at a throne with a cutaway to a film clip where [[Film/ReservoirDogs a man is about to torture his seated captive.]] |
| 361 | ** Same scene, after watching the elaborate set up Stefan did for Laura, Jerk states he should've just hired a hooker since it's cheaper. |
| 362 | ** "Can you believe we're on the same stage that [[Series/FullHouse Jesse and the Rippers]] performed? It's my generation's Woodstock." |
| 363 | ** His expression at hearing Laura's last name: |
| 364 | -->'''Jerk:''' Who the fuck is Laura Winslow? [[IAmNotShazam This is a show about the]] Series/FamilyMatters. That's Laura Matters, Carl Matters, Harriette Matters, [[Music/{{Eminem}} Marshall Matters]], Grandma Matters, and [[Series/LeaveItToBeaver Jerry Matters as The Beaver]]. |
| 365 | ** His confusion over whether the proposal is a dream sequence or was occurring in the plot and the overreaction to Laura stating "Ketchup" as yes to the marriage proposal. |
| 366 | * His rant about how Disney World is "wasted on you people" and [[MistakenForRacist then starts to correct himself before he dives into the pond]]. |
| 367 | * The Phil Buni non-union replacement ranting about Florida as a reaction to Carl wanting to move to Orlando after spending time in Disney World : |
| 368 | -->'''Replacement:''' Florida is the worst thing to happen in the history of worst things! It is so backwards, it makes the guy behind me totally walk backwards! Everyone in Florida is an abortion. Millions of abortions walking around, talking to each other, not even knowing they're abortions, because they're so dumb. In Florida, they don't even incarcerate their murderers, because if you're murdered in Florida, at least because you don't have to live in Florida. |
| 369 | * The RunningGag that the StudioAudience {{Squee}}ing is actually them screaming from being attacked by bees. |
| 370 | * Mocking Stefan for moving Myra to another spot nearby just to tell her the bad news, laments how Urkel of all people has two gorgeous girlfriends fighting over him, and then ranting at the asteroid from Captain EO for breaking his heart. |
| 371 | * The celebrations for Stefan stating he'll never be Steve again. |
| 372 | * Rip out my Urkel lovin' heart! |
| 373 | * Stating the difference between Canadian [[Franchise/WinnieThePooh Pooh]] and [[TheMafia Italian Pooh]]. |
| 374 | * Him telling Laura that just because life is based on a lie doesn't mean she can't be happy. |
| 375 | -->'''Jerk:''' No, look, just because your life is a lie doesn't mean you can't be happy. Just look at me! My whole life is a lie and I'm happy as a clam! I've never told anyone this but I am Nicole Simpson's real killer. Yeah. And I shot [[Music/TupacShakur Tupac]]. And [[Music/TheNotoriousBig Biggie]]. And [[UsefulNotes/JohnFKennedy JFK]]. And [[Series/{{Dallas}} JR Ewing]]. I escaped from Gitmo twice and I still have the tag to prove it. I- I– I- *pause* I am UsefulNotes/JackTheRipper. And the Film/{{Zodiac|2007}} Killer. And [[Film/TheUsualSuspects Keyser Söze]]. And the undercover cop in ''Film/ReservoirDogs''. Uh, I started the goddamn Chicago fire. I canceled {{Series/Firefly}}! I'll confess to whatever you want just please for the love of god don't bring Urkel back from the dead. |
| 376 | ** His facepalming after Urkel came back and then Sursum Ursa's outraged reaction to his rant: |
| 377 | --> '''Sursum Ursa:''' [[TranquilFury You...canceled...]] ''{{Series/Firefly}}?'' ... ''You monster!'' ''(confronts the camera)'' |
| 378 | * This gem: |
| 379 | -->'''Urkel:''' It alters my DNA code on a genetic level, changing me into a completely different person. |
| 380 | -->'''Jerk:''' I call it a re[[Series/DoctorWho tardis]]! |
| 381 | * David Lander's character's reaction to Urkel being played over and over as gospel music from ''Film/TheBluesBrothers'' are played. |
| 382 | --> This is an outrage! You are [[ArsonMurderAndJaywalking an embarrassment to science, technology, and pants]]. You're a fraud! |
| 383 | -->'''Jerk:''' Preach it [[Series/LaverneAndShirley Squiggy!]] |
| 384 | * The end of TheStinger |
| 385 | -->'''Disney World Ad:''' Disney World. Even we don't think you should live here! |
| 386 | [[/folder]] |
| 387 | |
| 388 | [[folder: Roseanne Goes to Disney World!]] |
| 389 | * The title card. Takes place in It's a Small World, with Roseanne and Dan looking crankily at Jerk while he watches the boats of people behind them start getting hysterical or burning, and Jerk getting a message on his walkie-talkie begging him out. |
| 390 | * Comments that certifiably crazy people make the best tv...sometimes. Then cuts to a clip of Roseanne interviewing Weird Al on her short-lived talk show. |
| 391 | * The RunningGag about Roseanne [[WesternAnimation/HomeOnTheRange ruining Disney Animation.]] |
| 392 | * Talking about how ''Series/{{Roseanne}}'' did a going to Disney World two parter and right after "Edelweiss Gardens" episode came on [[RomanAClef satirizing or not satirizing Disney World]]. |
| 393 | * He equates ''Series/ItsAlwaysSunnyInPhiladelphia'' as ''Series/{{Roseanne}}'''s spiritual successor. |
| 394 | --> '''Jerk:''' People tend to forget how un family-friendly ''Roseanne'' was at the time and yet she got a Disney World episode. Because even the...no especially the world's most selfish, despicable, back-stabbing monsters still deserve to wait in line for Big Thunder Mountain right in front of you! |
| 395 | --> '''Darlene:''' And yet another federal offense I witnessed in this house. |
| 396 | --> '''Jerk:''' And if you sent that kind to Disney World today... |
| 397 | --> (''Music for Series/ItsAlwaysSunnyInPhiladelphia comes on'') "The Gang Accidentally Burns Down EPCOT": It's Always Sunny In Lake Buena Vista |
| 398 | * Jerk wonders how he's going to review the Connor Family going to Disney World, especially since the show had more cynical jokes than the previous sitcoms and was more [[BreakingTheFourthWall self-aware]]. All he can point out are inaccuracies. |
| 399 | --> '''Jackie:''' I was readin' about this. You know, this used to be all Orange Groves. |
| 400 | --> '''[[Film/ChasingAmy Banky Edwards]]:''' Wrong coast. |
| 401 | --> '''Jackie:''' But that's not what one Mr. Walt Disney saw, he saw that lake, he saw that castle! |
| 402 | --> '''Jerk:''' (''standing at EPCOT'') He mostly saw a giant unfeasible city of the future that never happened before he dropped dead. But on the other hand...''movie clip!'' |
| 403 | --> '''[[Film/TheBigLebowski The Dude]]:''' Not wrong, Walter, you're just an asshole! |
| 404 | --> '''Walter:''' Okay then. |
| 405 | * All the references to John Goodman's films, including ''Film/TheBigLebowski'', ''Film/KingRalph'' and a clip of Goodman running down a fiery hallway shouting "I'll show you the life of the mind!" from ''Film/BartonFink''. |
| 406 | ** When Dan Conner abandons the family to go drinking at Epcot, Jerk overdubs an impression of Goodman shouting "I'll show you the death of the liver!" |
| 407 | * His answer to Aunt Jackie being stressed over how to squeeze in vacation time. |
| 408 | --> '''Jerk:''' Oh, come on, [[Franchise/ToyStory Andy's Mom]], just get Andy's Dad. How hard can it be to get him out of Gitmo? |
| 409 | * Jerk snarks at their hotel activities: |
| 410 | --> '''Mark:''' Man, steak for breakfast. I feel like, like, Merv Griffin! |
| 411 | --> '''Jerk! As Merv Griffin:''' Dead! (''fakes a heart attack'') |
| 412 | * Remarking on how "When You Wish Upon A Star" was [[SarcasmMode so easily replaced by something more appropriate]]....The 1812 Overture! |
| 413 | * The crowd looking at Spaceship Earth, and then he remarks that he stared at it so long, he swore it moved. |
| 414 | * Dan in Germany at EPCOT's World Showcase |
| 415 | --> '''Dan:''' So where's [[Series/HogansHeroes Sgt. Shultz]]? |
| 416 | --> '''[[Film/DjangoUnchained Dr. King Shultz]]:''' These days I practice a new profession... bounty hunting. |
| 417 | --> WE APOLOGIZE FOR CUTTING TO SUCH A PAINFULLY OBVIOUS MOVIE CLIP, AND INSTEAD CUT TO THIS TOTALLY DIFFERENT MOVIE CLIP. |
| 418 | --> (''Rewinds and then repeats Dan's question and the clip'') |
| 419 | --> NO, I SAID A DIFFERENT MOVIE CLIP. LIKE, I DUNNO, MAYBE CHARLES DURNING YELLING "SHULTZ!" IN "TO BE OR NOT TO BE" OR SOM-- WAIT, WHAT ARE YOU DOING? WHA--WHAT ARE YOU...? |
| 420 | --> ''(Dr. Shultz fires a pistol, presumably hitting [[Film/ToBeOrNotToBe Col. Erhardt]])'' |
| 421 | --> '''Col. Erhardt:''' [[CatchPhrase Shultz!]] |
| 422 | --> '''The Dude:''' Fucking Nazis. |
| 423 | --> '''Jerk! As Film/KingRalph:''' Seriously, I'm the King and my name is Ralph! |
| 424 | * This joke was just too soon. |
| 425 | --> '''Bev:''' Oh look at us we're the three [[Series/TheMickeyMouseClub Mouseketeers]]. Except I'm the only one with the [[BuxomBeautyStandard stuff to be Annette]]. |
| 426 | --> '''Jerk:''' Yeah, you do look like you'd die in a coma. |
| 427 | --> (''gets punched'') |
| 428 | * Jerk doesn't like Darlene much. |
| 429 | --> '''David:''' You know, DJ, I think it'd be fun to just sit with Darlene. |
| 430 | --> '''Darlene:''' You're not going to be just sitting, David. In a minute, I'm going to have you go fetch me a Coke |
| 431 | --> '''Jerk!As David:''' (''Smiling'') I'm back with your Coke (''giggles and throws it in her face'') |
| 432 | --> '''Darlene:''' [[Film/{{The Wizard of Oz}} AAAAAAA!!!!!!! I'm melting! Melting! Oh, what a world! What a world!]] |
| 433 | * [[DoesThisRemindYouOfAnything What Does This Look Like!]] after Franchise/WinnieThePooh starts hugging Darlene, implying that the two are humping each other but everyone [[ComicallyMissingThePoint viewing the Dumbo ride down and the Sky Way was working]]. |
| 434 | * The reference to two characters played by Johnny Galecki and David's favor of flannel. |
| 435 | --> [[Series/TheBigBangTheory Leonard Hofstadter:]] flannel |
| 436 | * The clips of the Edelweiss Gardens episode and saying that it seemed as though the show was making fun of Disney World...or not. |
| 437 | ** Stating that Roseanne just chewed off Phil Buni's head off and his last words cursed Florida. |
| 438 | * Jerk (as a ''Roseanne'' writer) getting shot in the head by a statue of Creator/WaltDisney for insulting Disney. |
| 439 | * Wondering who Darlene's baby daddy is...David? Or... |
| 440 | --> '''Jerk!As Keith Richards! As Franchise/WinnieThePooh:''' Oh, don't act so surprised, [[VerbalTic mate!]] Everyone knows I've had more illegitimate cubs than you've had sandwiches! ''(chuckles)'' I don't even bother to wear pants, [[InsistentTerminology mate!]] |
| 441 | --> '''Jerk:''' Please don't call me mate. |
| 442 | --> '''Jerk!As Keith Richards! As Franchise/WinnieThePooh:''' Well, you want to know something else, luv? |
| 443 | --> '''Jerk:''' What else? |
| 444 | --> '''Jerk!As Keith Richards! As Franchise/WinnieThePooh:''' ''[[{{Squick}} This ain't honey!]]'' |
| 445 | --> '''Jerk:''' [[ScreamingAtSquick Ewwww!!!!! Gawd!]] |
| 446 | ** Or did Walt somehow put his seed in Darlene? |
| 447 | * At the end of the review, Jerk complains that there was a lack of cheesiness in the episode and he was starving from the lack of it, then sees he's reviewing ''Series/StepByStep''. Then takes a large bite of a hunk of Swiss cheese. |
| 448 | * There are two different versions of the end credits with different songs, both used so well that it's hard to tell which one was funnier: [[WesternAnimation/HomeOnTheRange k.d. lang's "Little Patch of Heaven"]] or Roseanne's [[{{Pun}} butchering]] of the American NationalAnthem. |
| 449 | * The moral of the story? Franchise/WinnieThePooh does have a Hundred Acre Wood! |
| 450 | [[/folder]] |
| 451 | |
| 452 | [[folder: Step by Step Goes to Disney World!]] |
| 453 | * The title card with a dazed Jerk holding a Polaroid of the Foster-Lambert family with Cody/Flash crossed out with Patrick Duffy's character looking hunched over and a crazed Carol entitled: Memories? There is also a billboard in the background telling people to eat at Pinetta's. |
| 454 | * The RunningGag that the show is so unmemorable that Jerk forgets it just a few seconds after watching it. |
| 455 | ** "This show is like a [[Film/TheMatrix televised blue pill]]; You took it and you instantly forgot everything about it!" |
| 456 | -->'''Jerk''': Oh boy, a new show with Patrick Duffy! I like him! (''munches popcorn'') Wow! Patrick Duffy's in this show too! He looks great for his age. (''munches more popcorn'') Holy shit, is that Patrick Duffy? Wow, this show just gets better and better. (''notices popcorn'') This is popcorn! I love popcorn! Hahaha- where am I? |
| 457 | ** "I watched this episode earlier to prepare and then instantly forgot everything about it, so excuse me while I watch it again." (''Caption: Forty-four minutes later'') |
| 458 | ** "So they go to Disney World thanks to their grandmother..." (''one minute later'') "So they go to Disney World thanks to their grandmother, played by [[Series/LostInSpace June Lockhart]] of all people..." (''two and a half minutes later'') What am I doing again? Oh yeah, this shit. So they go to Disney World thanks to their grandmother, played by June Lockhart of all people... |
| 459 | ** It even makes its way into the ClipShow parody Channel Awesome intro. |
| 460 | -->'''Jerk:''' Say, remember the show ''Step By Step''? |
| 461 | -->'''Spazz:''' No. |
| 462 | -->'''Jerk:''' Me neither! |
| 463 | -->(''he smiles into space while Spazz stares at him'') |
| 464 | * After JT blows all of his and Rich's money over a date. |
| 465 | -->'''Rich:''' As soon as I can scrounge up enough money for bus fare, I'm heading back to Port Washington and find myself a new friend. |
| 466 | -->'''Jerk!Rich:''' And then I'm gonna be in ''WesternAnimation/AGoofyMovie'', and ''Anime/SpiritedAway'', and [[WesternAnimation/TheFairlyOddParents Fairly Oddparents]], I'm gonna get [[Creator/JasonMarsden tons of voice work]] you're '''GONNA GET SHOT IN BOTH ARMS OVER A TRAFFIC DISPUTE!!!''' |
| 467 | ** "This joke brought to you by Website/{{IMDb}}: What you do instead of things!" |
| 468 | * Jerk musing over the rollercoaster in the "county fair" opening of the show. |
| 469 | -->'''Jerk''': As a side note, that thing must be a bitch to lug from county to county every summer. (''sees the Six Flags Sky Tower in the background'') Ohhh, it's Magic Mountain, that makes perfect sens- HOLY SHIT THE I-5 HAS FLOODED!! IT'S THE APOCALYPSE!!! ''AAAAAAAAAAAA-'' |
| 470 | * After recapping the episode's plot, a ClicheStorm of plot points from previous ABC Disney World episodes: |
| 471 | -->'''[[Franchise/DieHard Sgt. Powell]]''': They got the universal terrorist's playbook, and they're running it ''step by step''. |
| 472 | -->'''Offscreen Jerk''': WRONG PARK! |
| 473 | ** "And now my ''Step by Step'' review is stealing ''Die Hard'' references from my ''Family Matters'' review. Have you no shame?!" |
| 474 | * When Jerk sees the mother is named Carol just like the mother from ''Series/TheBradyBunch''. |
| 475 | -->'''Jerk''': It was already blatant ''Brady Bunch'' ripoff and they had the ''gall'' to name the mother with hair of gold "Carol", out of all the female names. You know what, I actually kinda admire that. So many writers go to such great length to hide their thieving hackery, and this show flat-out embraced it. I mean, Mark Zuckerberg didn't call his site "[[{{Website/Facebook}} Winkelbook]]", Music/VanillaIce didn't call that song "Ice Ice Pressure", and I sure as hell don't start every show saying- |
| 476 | -->'''Jerk![[WebVideo/TheNostalgiaCritic Nostalgia Critic]]''': Hellooo, I'm the Vacation Critic. I encounter it because you don't get to! Do you ever start out a sentence very calmly and rationally, [[TakeThat AND THEN EXPLODE INTO A FIT OF RAGE FOR NO GOOD REASON?!?!]] ''This'' is ''Series/StepByStep''! |
| 477 | -->'''Jerk''': You know why I don't do that? Because I. Don't. Know. Why. Either. I've forgotten everything again. ...what am I doing? |
| 478 | * "Doesn't summer vacation last longer than one week? Apparently not! Fuckin' Obama..." |
| 479 | * After Carol tells Dan some innuendo-laced teases in front of their infant child: |
| 480 | -->'''Jerk!Lilly'''': Every time I see a Disney park commercial I just start screaming and puking and I don't know why. I can't even watch Blip anymore- |
| 481 | -->'''Jerk!Therapist''': [[SelfDeprecation What the hell is Blip...]] |
| 482 | -->'''Jerk!Lilly''': And it's even worse with their new ad campaign. |
| 483 | -->'''Commercial''': Disney World: Where your parents have sex. |
| 484 | -->''(Later)'' |
| 485 | -->'''Grandma''': Jean-Claude and I have ''plans''. |
| 486 | -->'''Commercial''': Disney World: Where your grandma has better sex. |
| 487 | * Jerk's utter confusion over the characters' going to a fictional Disney World restaurant called "Pinetta's." The closest equivalent he finds is a [[https://plus.google.com/111755106432626265230/about?gl=us&hl=en an obscure restaurant in Louisiana]]. |
| 488 | -->'''Jerk''': Was it this hard to find an expensive restaurant in ''Disney World?!'' The freaking churros have installment plans! |
| 489 | * So, is anyone else a little unnerved by how horny everyone is... |
| 490 | -->'''Commercial''': Disney World: Basically an orgy with churros. |
| 491 | * When the girls learn about a country music contest for a college scholarship. |
| 492 | -->'''Jerk!Southerner''': 'Cause if there's one thing we country folk love, it's higher edumacation! Ain't that right, [[Franchise/{{Cars}} Mater]]? |
| 493 | -->'''Jerk!Mater''': Sure! I hired me a Cajun last week! Then I ran him over for talking French! |
| 494 | ** "And now, ladies and gentlemen, Mr. Music/JohnnyCash!" [[MoodWhiplash "I hurt]] [[Music/NineInchNails myself today..."]] |
| 495 | * After Dana calls Karen the "queen of the Nashville Nazis". |
| 496 | -->'''Jerk''': I've just found the name of my new cover band. |
| 497 | -->'''Jerk!Hitler''': RIP OUT MY URKEL-LOVING HEART, LORD, LORD! DON'T YOU RIP OUT MY URKEL-LOVING SOOUUULLL!!! |
| 498 | * Jerk's parody commercials, which include a very ear-painful Patrick Duffy commercial and a surreal Thighmaster commercial. |
| 499 | -->'''Commercial''': So it's easy to squeeze, squeeze, ''squeeze'', ''squeeze'', ''SQUEEZE'', ''SQUEEZE'', '''''SQUEEZE''''', '''''SQUEEZE'''''- |
| 500 | * Jerk's song for the "inspirational montage"? "Learning To Read Made Me Cool", an obvious community service contractual requirement. |
| 501 | * When the show commits CowboyBebopAtHisComputer during the subplot of Flash riding every Disney World ride. |
| 502 | -->'''Flash''': As soon as I'm done with Astro Orbiter, I'm on my way to Alien Encounter. |
| 503 | -->'''Mark''': Negative, repeat, that's a negative, Flash. Plans have changed on Alien Encounter. Access route is impeded. Parade in progress. |
| 504 | -->'''Jerk''': ...but, both those things were in Tomorrowland. The parades never went through Tomorrowland. |
| 505 | -->'''Mark''': Please choose alternate route going through Fantasyland, and proceed directly to Jungle Cruise, over. |
| 506 | -->'''Jerk''': That does go through the parade! Are you insane?! You- ...you're trying to sabotage him. You commie bastard, you were working for the Ruskies this whole time! You diabolic- |
| 507 | -->'''Jerk!Mark''': (''points gun'') Just back away, man. You have ''no idea'' how high this goes. |
| 508 | -->'''Jerk''': ...take it easy, alright, it's just a theme park- |
| 509 | -->'''Jerk!Mark''': IT'S NEVER JUST A THEME PARK! This involves the NSA, the World Bank, {{ComicBook/SHIELD}}, Rob Ford! You think Pinetta's was erased from history by accident? IT KNEW TOO MUCH!! |
| 510 | -->'''Jerk''': Calm down, okay? I mean, it's ''Step by Step'', I'm going to forget everything about this episode the instant it's over, it's ''Step by Step''- oh my god. |
| 511 | -->'''Jerk!Mark''': What? |
| 512 | -->'''Jerk''': The show's called ''Step by Step'', and it's about ''stepsiblings''. |
| 513 | -->'''Jerk!Mark''': [[FridgeBrilliance Whoa]]... |
| 514 | -->'''Jerk''': I literally just this moment noticed that. |
| 515 | -->'''Jerk!Mark''': Holy Christ on a cracker... |
| 516 | -->'''Jerk''': This show is ''deep''! |
| 517 | -->'''Jerk!Mark''': I know, right? |
| 518 | -->'''Jerk''': So, we still on for bowling on Thursday? |
| 519 | -->'''Jerk!Mark''': Only if you buy the shoes! |
| 520 | * After seeing [[NoOSHACompliance Flash being suddenly hired to play Indiana Jones in the Indiana Jones Epic Stunt Spectacular]], Jerk plays a movie montage of [[BigNo characters yelling "NOOOO!!!"]] that lasts for ''almost a whole minute''. |
| 521 | * "Where do you draw the line between suspension of disbelief and false advertising?" |
| 522 | -->'''Commercial''': Disney World: Where your kids perform death-defying stunts in front of thousands of witnesses and the restraints on thrill rides are optional because Mickey Mouse ice cream bars give you the power to fly and if you buy two of every plush toy your mom and dad will get back together and grandma will finally wake up! |
| 523 | * After that brief bout of ''[[Franchise/IndianaJones Illinois Smith and the Temple of Dumb]]'', Jerk forgives the episode's events, [[TemptingFate just as long as it doesn't retread any of the previous Disney World episodes' mistakes...]] [[BerserkButton and the VERY NEXT CLIP is of the brothers riding the (just-recently augmented with an extra drop the WEEK the episode aired) Twilight Zone Tower of Terror.]] And the bellhop in this clip looks EXACTLY like the one in the "Family Matters" episode. |
| 524 | * After Flash breaks the world record for riding all the Disney World rides in under 4 days: |
| 525 | -->'''Jerk''': And two years later Animal Kingdom opened and his record got smeared with an asterisk. (''Franchise/SuperMarioBros Death music'') |
| 526 | [[/folder]] |
| 527 | |
| 528 | [[folder: Boy Meets World Goes to Disney World!]] |
| 529 | * "You know, this whole time I've been trying to do a nice review show of sitcoms that joined cults. The ''Series/FullHouse'' {{Film/Jonestown}} episode was a heartwarming masterpiece!" |
| 530 | * Jerk cautions the viewers prior to something he's surprised made it past ABC's censors: [[NotSoDire Eric's decoy Cory doll]]. Or, as Jerk calls it, [[ActuallyPrettyFunny "the ABC 'Let's go to Disney World!' sitcom's first hilarious joke"]]. |
| 531 | * Right as it seems like Cory is about to prevent the episode from continuing ([[CuttingTheKnot by simply talking to Topanga]]), Mickey Mouse ''demands'' he go to Disney World, otherwise [[MoneyDearBoy there'd only be]] ''[[MoneyDearBoy one]]'' [[MoneyDearBoy show promoting Disney World that night]]. |
| 532 | ** Mickey ''then'' goes on an evil rant about how he is now ever so much closer to getting his revenge for Ben Savage's brother, Fred, [[Film/TheWizard promoting Universal Studios]], with the ending bars of [[WesternAnimation/{{Pocahontas}} "Savages"]] getting ever louder in the background. |
| 533 | -->'''[[Film/{{Clerks}} Dante Hicks]]''': Bunch of savages in this town. |
| 534 | * The inexplicable ''lack'' of bees during on-screen kisses. |
| 535 | ** This is because the production assistant (voiced by Jerk) [[ItMakesSenseInContext got hit in the eye with a french fry]], and said eye [[KickTheDog proceeds to get infected]]. |
| 536 | ** It's eventually concluded that the bees are probably ''dead'' now. |
| 537 | * The parody Disneyland ad promoting stalking... which turns into a psychotic rant from the narrator to a girl he's harassing. And then it turns out Jerk is watching that very ad on his phone. |
| 538 | -->'''Jerk''': (sigh) [-Same fuckin' commercial every time...-] (mockingly lip-syncs to the commercial, complete with hand mouth) "Why won't the universe accept me as it's rightful ruler?! All the other universes do! Infidels will be sent to the gulags! [[{{Angrish}} Meatloaf Bangladesh!]]" |
| 539 | ** That same ad makes a return appearance later [[ItMakesSenseInContext as the director (also voiced by Jerk) yells at the aforementioned PA]]. |
| 540 | * "And so Cory and Shawn... sleep in a Splash Mountain log, because ABC is officially fucking with me at this point[.]" |
| 541 | * "Excuse me, Mr. [[WesternAnimation/BeautyAndTheBeast Beast]], we're looking for a girl-" "'''Join the fucking ''[+CLUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUB+]''!!!'''" |
| 542 | * Jerk's slow-burn realization that this episode is also a mini-''Series/StepByStep'' crossover. |
| 543 | * When discussing how apparently several [=TGIF=] sitcoms take place in the same universe, Jerk concludes that [=TGIF=] was "'''[[Film/TheAvengers2012 THE AVENGERS]] OF THE NINETIES'''"[[note]]"And the Nineties [[TakeThat clearly]] [[Film/TheAvengers1998 didn't deserve to be avenged]]..."[[/note]]. Complete with Urkel being Iron Man, the Cory decoy as the ''Hulk'' and ''Michelle Tanner as '''Thor'''''. |
| 544 | * [[WebVideo/TheIdiotsLantern The Wire]] tells Jerk that TV characters can't see or hear them when he talks to them. |
| 545 | -->'''Jerk''': So when I'm home alone watching TV I don't have to wear clothes? |
| 546 | -->'''Wire''': Unless it's [[TrappedInTVLand me!]] |
| 547 | -->'''Jerk''': Well that is a load off my mind. |
| 548 | -->'''Wire (in the distance)''': Seriously, unless it's me! |
| 549 | [[/folder]] |
| 550 | |
| 551 | [[folder: Sabrina The Teenage Witch Goes to Disney World!]] |
| 552 | * "Previously On Next Time" (''fast-forwards through the entire episode'') "And now, in slow motion." |
| 553 | * Jerk's nickname for the show and Animal Kingdom: "Girl Meets Other World" and "[[OddlyNamedSequel2ElectricBoogaloo Epcot 2: Acoustic Zoogaloo]]." |
| 554 | * "[[AWizardDidIt Magic: Because Fuck You]]" |
| 555 | * After Sabrina casually whines about causing El Niño during a magic exam: |
| 556 | -->'''Jerk''': Millions of innocent people lost everything they own including ''their lives'' at my hand. Their tears will haunt my dreams forever! (''Wah-wah sound effect'') |
| 557 | -->'''Narrator''': That's next week on ''That Darn God''! |
| 558 | * The frequent ''Literature/HarryPotter'' references, including dubbing her witch exams as her "O.W.L.S." and claimed she needs to practice her "Gobblydegook" (goblin language). |
| 559 | * After Sabrina's teacher Mr. Kraft gives the cast their hotel numbers while at the entrance of Animal Kingdom: |
| 560 | -->'''Jerk!Kraft''': As you can see, I've brought you all the way here to the park entrance only to ''send you away to your hotel rooms!'' Wasn't that a nice trip? You see, I psychologically torture you young ones to compensate for being [[Creator/MartinMull one of the greatest comedians of my generation]] and yet... stuck playing a clueless principal on ABC. ...well, at least it's not a clueless dad on Fox. |
| 561 | * The sketch after Sabrina's aunts use a fossilized bone to resurrect a caveman in which Sabrina's aunt (played by [[WebVideo/TheIdiotsLantern the Wire]]) keeps killing Sabrina ([[ActingForTwo also played by the Wire]]) and resurrecting her after 100 years to solve her sitcom-y problems. |
| 562 | --> '''Wire!Sabrina''': I can't follow my history homework. When did we go to war with Ride/{{LEGOLAND}}? |
| 563 | ** [[BrickJoke This message brought to you by the NRA: because fuck you.]] |
| 564 | * His reference to ''Series/TheWeirdAlShow'': |
| 565 | -->'''Jerk''': But 'insert other thing that Creator/CarolineRhea has done here' here helps Harvey escape the bitch by turning him into Weird Al's hamster! |
| 566 | -->'''"Weird Al" Yankovic''': Run Harvey run! Faster! Faster! |
| 567 | -->'''Jerk''': But then that show got cancelled, so he became a safari tour guide whatever! |
| 568 | * Jerk decides to cap up his look at the "the Disney World sitcoms on [=ABC=]" with a musical number to the tune of [[WesternAnimation/FamilyGuy "The Freakin' FCC"]]. At the end of the song, Jerk stands frozen with a smile on his face, [[TemptingFate mentally pleading for this to actually be the end.]] [[ShootTheShaggyDog Cue the announcement of the next episode: "ABC Goes to DisneyLAND!"]] |
| 569 | [[/folder]] |
| 570 | |
| 571 | [[folder: ABC Goes to DisneyLAND!]] |
| 572 | * Picking up from the end of the previous episode's musical number, Jerk proceeds to launch into ''this'' video as if nothing happened, even brushing away a credit since "[he's] not done yet". |
| 573 | * Concerning the ''Series/AccordingToJim'' two-parter "When You Wish Upon A Star", set on the Disney Cruise Line: |
| 574 | -->'''[[Series/TheOfficeUS Jim]]''': [[Recap/TheOfficeUSS2E11BoozeCruise He says that he's king of the world within the first hour, or I give you my next paycheck.]] |
| 575 | -->(cut to Jim Belushi [[GilliganCut doing just that]]) |
| 576 | -->(cut to Jim checking his watch) |
| 577 | * "Jim Belushi drowning in a sea of diarrhea!" |
| 578 | * After starting to describe the plot of the two-parter in further detail, Jerk says that [[TakeThat he doesn't give a shit about the Disney Cruise Line]], abruptly switching topics to "[[Series/TheGeorgeLopezShow George Goes to Disneyland]]". |
| 579 | * "...dad, [[BreakingTheFourthWall the TV's talking to me again]]..." "I'll call the exorcist." "''Yaaaaay!''" |
| 580 | * After it's revealed that the episode had a contest running alongside it, finding hidden Mickeys to win a trip to Disneyland, Spazzmaster gets excited over the notion, only for Jerk to angrily respond that it's "not the time". |
| 581 | ** Jerk assures us that this contest won't distract them from the episode's story [[TakeThat since it has none]]. |
| 582 | ** As it happens, [[UnwinnableByDesign a decent chunk of the hidden Mickeys could only be found if you were watching in widescreen, something not many people had in 2004.]] And to make matters worse, the [=DVD=] set the episode came on is cropped to "fullscreen", proving (at least to Jerk) that "evidently, the studio thinks this show's target audience ''still'' can't afford widescreen!" |
| 583 | --->'''Jerk (as George Lopez)''': ''You'' can win a vacation to Disneyland ''[[FalseReassurance if]]'' you can afford a trip to Disneyland! All you have to do is give all that precious money (gestures to Mickey head) to ''this'' thing! |
| 584 | --->(cut to [=ABC=] bumper) |
| 585 | --->[[DepartmentOfRedundancyDepartment America's Redundant Network of Redundancy Network of America]] |
| 586 | * The return of Pinetta's. |
| 587 | * Quite possibly Jerk's most famous joke yet: [[DepartmentofRedundancyDepartment The New Twilight Zone Tower of Terror The New Twilight Zone Tower of Terror The New Twilight Zone]] [[BrokenRecord Tower of Terror The New Twilight Zone Tower of Terror The New Twilight Zone Tower of Terror]] -- how do we get out of this? |
| 588 | [[/folder]] |
| 589 | |
| 590 | !Season 3 |
| 591 | |
| 592 | [[folder: Back to the Future: The Ride]] |
| 593 | * WebVideo/TheNostalgiaCritic cameos and chides the Jerk for taking so long to put out another video. He also insists that every review of a ''Franchise/BackToTheFuture'' product have at least one bad Doc Brown impersonation, leading to a TerribleIntervieweesMontage of Doc impersonators. |
| 594 | * His version of a TV special promoting the ride starring Creator/KirkCameron, who takes the time machine and goes back to be the [[Literature/TheBible thirteenth apostle]]. |
| 595 | -->'''Preacher Haley''' (reading from the Bible): And the cowardly apostle Kirk said "I'll do it for twenty-nine pieces!" |
| 596 | * Jerk pointing out how Biff, in spite of his actions in ''Part II'', is ultimately a HarmlessVillain due to being beaten with one punch by Creator/CrispinGlover, to which Jerk also iterates that anybody who got their asses kicked by Glover deserved it. Cue an annoyed [[WebVideo/BrowsHeldHigh Kyle Kallgren]] telling Jerk to shut up.[[note]]Kallgren's video on Glover's "What Is It?" got taken down.[[/note]] |
| 597 | * In Part 3, Critic interrupts again to criticize Jerk for improperly handling a scene in which Doc Brown, played by Christopher Lloyd, sends the time machine back to the ice age, "a day when everything was ''[[Film/SuburbanCommando frozen]]''". |
| 598 | ** Jerk makes up for it with a "motherfucking T-Rex" reference later and asks if he's happy. Critic didn't notice. He was busy arguing with WebVideo/FilmBrain, or at least [[WebVideo/WhatWeHadToWatch Il Neige]] insisting he's not him.[[note]]A callback to an April Fool's review in which Il Neige reviewed ''Film/SnakesOnAPlane'' while impersonating Film Brain.[[/note]] |
| 599 | ** And also, three of the faux Docs say the famous line in tandem during the "Show Us Your Doc" montage. |
| 600 | * Jerk's ''very'' LongList of things that have now changed because the ride went so far back in time. To prevent the following quote from turning into a mess of potholes, a list of each work the Jerk references in the following sentence can be found [[labelnote:here.]]''Film/ItsAWonderfulLife'', ''Literature/HarryPotterAndThePrisonerofAzkaban'', ''WesternAnimation/MrPeabodyAndSherman'', ''Series/DoctorWho'', ''Film/TimeBandits'', ''Film/TheRainmaker'', ''Film/{{Looper}}'', ''Film/AustinPowersTheSpyWhoShaggedMe'', ''Film/SoylentGreen'', ''Film/BillAndTedsExcellentAdventure'', ''Film/AWalkInTheClouds'', ''Film/{{Freaked}}'', ''Film/TheTimeMachine1960'', ''Film/CloudAtlas'', ''Film/DemolitionMan'', ''Film/GroundhogDay'', ''Film/EdgeOfTomorrow'', ''Film/TheRockyHorrorPictureShow'', ''WesternAnimation/TheSimpsons'', ''WesternAnimation/{{Futurama}}'', ''WesternAnimation/GravityFalls'', ''Film/TimeCop'', ''Film/TheButterflyEffect'', ''Film/MenInBlack3'', ''WesternAnimation/MeetTheRobinsons'', ''WesternAnimation/FreeBirds'', ''Film/HotTubTimeMachine'', ''It's a Wonderful Life'' (again), ''Film/StarTrek2009'', Eric Stoltz being the original Marty [=McFly=] in ''Film/BackToTheFuture1'', ''Film/PulpFiction'', Peyton Reed replacing Edgar Wright on ''Film/AntMan1'', Music/WeirdAlYankovic's "Foil", ''Series/MysteryScienceTheater3000'', ''Series/{{Community}}'', ''Film/TheFuture'', ''Film/LaJetee'', ''Film/DonnieDarko'', ''Film/Terminator2JudgmentDay'', ''Film/XMenDaysOfFuturePast'', ''Film/Plan9FromOuterSpace'', and ''Film/GalaxyQuest''.[[/labelnote]] |
| 601 | --> '''Jerk''': George Bailey was never born, Buckbeak was put down, Mr. Peabody was put down, the Doctor stole the Supreme Being's map, the Rainmaker killed all the Loopers, Austin Powers' mojo was turned into ''Film/SoylentGreen'', Ted Theodore Logan got sent to Military School in Alaska where he knocked up Sarah Palin's dog and created a dog man who evolved into the Morlocks who worship Sonmi-451 and use seashells for toilet paper, Bill Murray got stuck in a time warp, Tom Cruise got stuck in a time warp ({{Beat}}) again, Homer fixes his toaster, Fry had sex with his grandma, Blendin wins at Globnar, ''Film/TimeCop'' arrested Creator/AshtonKutcher, Boglodites invaded Earth, Bowler Hat Guy's Bowler Hat enslaved the Robinsons, Turkeys prevented the first thanksgiving, Rob Coudrey joined Motley Crue, Pottersville was sued into bankruptcy by Creator/JKRowling, Captain Kirk was Chris Pine, Marty [=McFly=] was Eric Stoltz, the drug dealer in ''Film/PulpFiction'' was Michael J. Fox, Peyton Reed was fired from this ride and replaced by Edgar Wright and everyone loved the results (But it still closed), the Lizard People all got existential crises, Mike Nelson was replaced by his brother Eddie, Jeff Wringer rolled a one and everyone turned evil, Miranda July's cat died, some french guy reconnected with a women he saw once, Donnie Darko ({{Beat}}) I don't know, Skynet created the sentinels and killed everyone, aliens raised the dead, apes control the planet, 9/11 never happened, the Omega-13 destroyed the '''UNIVERSE'''... |
| 602 | * The ''Film/CloudAtlas'' reference when talking about Biff Tannen: |
| 603 | --> '''Jerk''': The manure-hating douchebag, whose manure-hating douchebagginess transcended generations, through centuries and centuries of Tannens, in an almost ''Nietzschean'' loop of Eternal Recasting. |
| 604 | --> '''Jerk!Old!Biff''': No matter what you do, it will never amount to more than a drop of manure in a limitless butthead. |
| 605 | --> '''Jerk!Young!Biff''': But what is a butthead, if not a multitude of manure? |
| 606 | ** [[AC:[[NoIndoorVoice LOUD ATLAS]]]] |
| 607 | * The "2015: Year of the future" sequence, featuring many wonderful inventions, and most of all, absolutely NO INTERNET! |
| 608 | --> "Uh oh, it's late October! Where are all the Halloween decorations? ({{Beat}}) Shut up." |
| 609 | ** "The Great Clintonian Sperm Purge!" |
| 610 | --->'''UsefulNotes/BillClinton''': [[DirtyOldMan If I can't do it]], [[TakingYouWithMe no one can]]. |
| 611 | ** "The equally Great Clintonian Perm Splurge!" |
| 612 | * Pretty much anything with the multiple Jerks. |
| 613 | -->'''[[EyepatchOfPower Future!Jerk]]''': I'm here to talk to you about the [[Film/TheAvengers2012 Aven-jerk Initiative]]. |
| 614 | * Jerk gets his brain melted by a GoshDangItToHeck montage. And it's Creator/GeorgeCarlin's Seven Dirty Words that heals him. |
| 615 | * “Why did Doc build the stupid time train?” |
| 616 | [[/folder]] |
| 617 | |
| 618 | [[folder:The Simpsons Ride]] |
| 619 | * The episode teaser has Jerk curled up in a ball and chanting [[Recap/TheSimpsonsS4E10LisasFirstWord "Can't ride, clown will eat me. Can't ride, clown will eat me."]] |
| 620 | * Jerk's reaction to a majority of Universal's movies about amusement parks being about deadly amusement parks: |
| 621 | -->"Universal: Can you identify this corpse?" |
| 622 | * After predicting that ''Ride/DespicableMeMinionMayhem'' will stay open way after people know what the franchise is, Jerk asks the audience to go to [[WesternAnimation/AnAmericanTail Fievel's Playland]] at Universal Studios Florida and ask the children playing there who the fuck Fievel is. A warning then pops up advising the viewers not to do that unless they enjoy prison. |
| 623 | * Not having many major criticisms with the ride, Jerk decides to resort to nitpicking by invoking the spirit of Comic Book Guy. |
| 624 | ** The countdown numbers use specific Simpsons moments where they say the numbers ("Tonight on the 11 o'clock news", "But nooo, you had to be 10", etc.) |
| 625 | ** The clip that plays after each nitpick: |
| 626 | --->"Boy, I really hope somebody got fired for that blunder." |
| 627 | ** Jerk stealing the Krustyland comics from the Krusty Burger dining room. |
| 628 | ** Jerk "having a cow", which turns out to be a horse. |
| 629 | ** Upon hearing Homer’s statement that he feels like Chewbacca, Jerk informs him that despite what the preshow videos for Star Tours have you believe, Chewbacca rides nothing! |
| 630 | * His utter disbelief that Harry Shearer wouldn't do voice work as he demanded too much money, but Kelsey Grammer, one of the highest paid TV actors at the time, was perfectly willing to reprise Sideshow Bob. |
| 631 | * [[Film/BackToTheFuturePartII "Park still looks fake."]] |
| 632 | * "Not Lenny!" |
| 633 | * "Hi, we're clones of Troy [=McClure=]! You might remember us from such battle tactics as using an umbrella, and evaporating at the touch of a hammer..." [-"[[DudeNotFunny Too soon!]]"-] |
| 634 | [[/folder]] |
| 635 | |
| 636 | [[folder: Shrek 4D]] |
| 637 | * Jerk's long list of ways you can get ''WesternAnimation/ShrekFourD'': |
| 638 | -->'''Jerk:''' And though the film was technically owned by Dreamworks, they agreed to keep it exclusive to Ride/UniversalStudios Hollywood! And Florida. And Japan. And eventually Singapore. And Movie Park Germany. And Warner Brothers Movie World in Australia. And it aired on Creator/{{Nickelodeon}} once. And it was shown in UK cinemas [[WesternAnimation/KungFuPanda2 with]] [[WesternAnimation/PussInBoots these]] [[WesternAnimation/Madagascar3EuropesMostWanted movies]]. And it was released on DVD. And on Creator/{{Netflix}}. And Website/YouTube. [[SerialEscalation And given away free with your breakfast]], but other than that... |
| 639 | * Gingy warns parkgoers to leave the ride when they still have a chance. Jerk takes this seriously, and exits the ride and [[OverlyLongGag does numerous other things at Universal]] to the tune of [[Film/ButchCassidyAndTheSundanceKid "Raindrops Keep Falling on my Head."]] When he attempts to leave the park in his car, the DVD of the attraction is right there waiting for him. |
| 640 | ** Jerk trying to catch the floating DVD throughout the park must have been hilarious to many an onlooker at the time as well, because before editing, he's basically swatting at nothing. |
| 641 | * Jerk's complaining about how Farquaad just became a ghost despite no else doing so by showing various other antagonists coming back as ghosts post death, ending with a musical number by "[[WesternAnimation/BeautyAndTheBeast Ghoston]]". |
| 642 | * Spazz, Conspiracy Guy, and Kill Bosby appear as ghosts. Spazz was eaten by Figment (and he ''still'' defends him) while it's [[NoodleIncident left unclear]] how Con Guy and Kill died. |
| 643 | * All the stuff with Kill Bosby, including [[DudeNotFunny Jerk and Spazz's reactions to him]] due to the real-life rape allegations against Creator/BillCosby. |
| 644 | * Part 1 ends with Gingy saying "That (gingerbread) house cost me a lot of dough!" and Jerk, Spazz, Conspiracy Guy, and Kill Bosby just [[LamePunReaction staring coldly and silently into the camera.]] |
| 645 | ** In Part 2, Jerk blames this pun for the two-month hiatus the show went on. |
| 646 | * When Jerk calls the Franchise/{{Ghostbusters}} for help, Janine (played by Spazz's wife Haley) says they don't help Website/ChannelAwesome contributors because WebVideo/NostalgiaCritic's old sketch with {{Film/Casper}} made them look like amateurs. |
| 647 | * After the stone dragon in Shrek 4D flies through the cave, he sings a bit of One Little Spark before falling to his death, since the dragon looked a bit like Figment due to his destroyed wings. Jerk assumes that this scene meant that Figment died, and everyone celebrates his death...except for Spazz, who is upset and mad about what happened. |
| 648 | ** Then, Figment returns as a giant ghost! |
| 649 | * When Jerk asks how to destroy a ghost, the ghosts say they can only be destroyed by [[TheDreaded a mysterious figure]] whose face has never been seen. That menacing horror? VideoGame/PacMan. |
| 650 | * The use of Creator/NeilCicierega's "Imagine All Star People" as the credits song. |
| 651 | * Jerk blames Film/{{Beetlejuice}} for driving him crazy, but when he tries telling him off, he and the ghosts (including [[TheCameo Casper]]) start dancing and singing "The Banana Boat Song". The kicker is that, since this is just a theme park actor playing Beetlejuice, he has no idea what's going on. |
| 652 | -->'''Beetlejuice:''' This guy, I don't know... |
| 653 | * In Part 2, Shrek explains to Fiona what Donkey means by "making waffles". |
| 654 | -->'''Shrek:''' It's slang for the most despicably, unconscionably perverted sexual act a dragon can do to a donkey. Can we try it later? |
| 655 | * Jerk tells off the editor for the ridiculous things he did in the review, but the editor (revealed to be Kill Bozby) replaces his rant with sentence-mixed SelfDeprecation. |
| 656 | [[/folder]] |
| 657 | |
| 658 | [[folder: Escape from Tomorrow]] |
| 659 | * Jerk opens the review complaining about being overshadowed by a project with a similar gimmick. Naturally, he's ranting about ''[[BaitAndSwitchComparison "MTV'S 'JERKS WITH CAMERAS?!']]'' ''ARE YOU '''SHITTING''' ME?!"'' |
| 660 | ** MTV: "Uuuuuugggghhhh!" |
| 661 | * The Disneyholics meeting with cameos from multiple Channel Awesome members, including Linkara. |
| 662 | ** As well as an adult {{WesternAnimation/Pinocchio}}. |
| 663 | --> '''Pinocchio:''' I'll never be a real boy again. |
| 664 | * Jerk is still filming his show in Universal Studios and refuses to go to Disneyland, even though ''Film/EscapeFromTomorrow'' was filmed in Disneyland and Disney World. He leaves Universal when Spazzmaster tells him that Comcast owns Universal and shoots a new intro in an empty, overgrown urban lot. After this, he constantly changes locations throughout California for the rest of the review. |
| 665 | * [[AlterEgoActing Some Jerk With A Colorful Sweater]] advertising Kyle "[[WebVideo/BrowsHeldHigh Oancitizen]]" Kallgren as "The Cine-Kyle" in the style of an infomercial. |
| 666 | ** Who eventually breaks when too much MindScrew happens even for him. |
| 667 | * His reaction to the opening of the film where a park guest gets decapitated by Big Thunder Mountain Railroad. |
| 668 | * His reaction to the director's statement that the movie "was not a Ben Stiller comedy." |
| 669 | --> '''Jerk:''' Tear up your annual passes folks, this is ''Film/NightAtTheMuseum 4: Escape from Tomorrow.'' |
| 670 | * His bafflement of the fact that the movie hired ''Production Designers'' even though it was filmed at Disneyland/Disney World. |
| 671 | * Jerk's comments on Jim trying to make out with his wife on a Winnie the Pooh ride. |
| 672 | -->'''Jerk:''' (As Jim) Come on, honey! You know I have [[BestialityIsDepraved a thing for bears]].\ |
| 673 | '''Jerk:''' (As Emily) [[JustForFun/IThoughtItMeant I thought you meant]] [[TheBear large, hairy gay men!]]\ |
| 674 | '''Jerk:''' (As Jim) That too. Now come on! The kids aren't gonna [[ParentalSexualitySquick traumatise]] themselves! |
| 675 | * The movie managed to make It's a Small World worse than it already was. |
| 676 | --> '''Jerk:''' Oh my God, I didn't think it was possible, but this music is even worse! Someone give this composer a medal, he just climbed Mount Everest while juggling flaming chainsaws and dividing by zero! He is one with the gods! |
| 677 | ** Jerk calls the ride to tell it that the movie's interpretation of the ride wasn't as scary as Jerk's experience with it. The ride calls him out for the rape jokes that he made during the "It's a Small World Holiday" review. Jerk then remembers that he also asked the ride to explode in that review. And the ride explodes. Again. |
| 678 | * After noticing a guy in the background looking at the actors in bewilderment: |
| 679 | --> "Annnd this guy is officially my favorite character in the movie. It's not even a photo''bomb'', it's photo-humanitarian relief efforts for victims of a bomb. He has ''no idea'' why these idiots are suddenly leaving the lines so close to the front of it!" *cut to Jerk* It's all fake you see. Th-the ride didn't actually break down, there is no Santa Claus, the Disney characters are just costumes with people in them, and [[SarcasmMode I'm pretty sure I'm a genius visionary for figuring those things out,]]" *reaches his hand out to the camera* "[[OscarBait OSCAR PLEASE!]]" |
| 680 | * After the first mention of [[ChekhovsGun "Cat Flu"]]: |
| 681 | --> "Ah, yes. The Cat Flu. That crippling disease that [[CursedWithAwesome improves your reflexes, enhances your internet view count, and makes everyone in the world love you for doing literally nothing."]] ''({{Beat}}. Starts licking a [[WesternAnimation/TheAristocats Marie]] [[CallBack doll.]])'' |
| 682 | * Jerk's rant on the notion that Disney Land's turkey legs come from emus, due to the fact that the amount of turkey legs sold per year ''outnumber'' the total population of the emu. |
| 683 | ** Later on, he's talking about how he hates the characters, and when he gets to "Emu Woman," [[Music/ElectricLightOrchestra a very familiar riff]] [[StealthPun plays.]] |
| 684 | * Jerk searches for the movie's plot in a mailbox, a K-Mart and a portal to the future that leads to [[TakeThat Fury Road.]] |
| 685 | ** When Jerk looks into the mailbox, [[FunnyBackgroundEvent a biker drives past him and he doesn't notice]]. Guess he missed ''a'' plot. |
| 686 | * Jerk's reaction to the sudden sex scene, and the fact it actually happened and wasn't another one of Jim's fantasies. He compares its randomness to a Cards Against Humanity session, which [[JumpCut cuts]] to Linkara at the Disneyholics meeting reading a card selection. |
| 687 | * Jerk going through the pool scene, which is almost six minutes long with nothing happening. |
| 688 | ** [[MoodWhiplash Then, when it looks like Jim drowned:]] |
| 689 | --> '''Jerk:''' Jesus. When it rains, it pours. |
| 690 | ** What street is Jerk standing on when this scene happens? Film/SunsetBoulevard. |
| 691 | ** Only for Jerk to be disappointed when it turns out that Jim did not drown. |
| 692 | * Jerk's reaction to the scene where Jim refers to Spaceship Earth as a giant testicle. |
| 693 | --> '''Jerk:''' '''WHAT THE HELL DO YOURS LOOK LIKE?''' |
| 694 | ** Then he decides to check his own...and recoils in StunnedSilence before uncomfortably shuffling off-camera. |
| 695 | * At a certain point, Jerk wonders why he's even watching the movie, then he realize it's because it's similar to his "surface level gimmick." He then decides that he hates cameras, but he can't seem to escape them. |
| 696 | * At the GainaxEnding, Jerk [[BigWHAT screams out a "WHAT" so long that]] ''he's still doing it 150 years later when he's a skeleton'', only stopped when a Franchise/{{Terminator}} steps on him. |
| 697 | * During the Soarin scene, he uses Spazz's head to cover up the boobs. |
| 698 | [[/folder]] |
| 699 | |
| 700 | [[folder: The Haunted Mansion]] |
| 701 | * Creator/CountJackula is thrilled to learn that Creator/JenniferTilly is in this movie, and [[NightmareFetishist even more thrilled]] to learn that she's playing a disembodied head. But he's quickly disappointed to learn that she will be playing a ''[[CrossesTheLineTwice human]]'' head. |
| 702 | * While laying down the production history of the movie, Jerk mistakes Creator/EddieMurphy for Creator/AudieMurphy, pointing out the odd casting choice of a guy who's been dead for a while by then but acknowledges that [[CrossesTheLineTwice his experience as a ghost will probably provide nuance to the role.]] |
| 703 | * Count Jackula and Horror Guru mistook Heimlich's Chew Chew Train for a very underwhelming ride based on ''Film/TheHumanCentipede''. |
| 704 | * After a couple sings a Happy Anniversary song to Jim, a fake newspaper headline comes on stating that he stabbed the couple to death with a pen while the Tiki Room theme song plays in the background. |
| 705 | * The entire scene where The Horror Guru explains how stupid and overused [[WhenYouComingHomeDad the busy parents cliche]] is, which is accompanied by Cat’s in the Cradle playing in the background: |
| 706 | -->'''Guru:''' Yeah, we got a lot of these bullshit movies in the 90’s! Movies where an aging comedian plays a workaholic dad who learns through supernatural contrivance that he’s a worthless human being unless he spends EVERY WAKING MOMENT with his [[WesternAnimation/TheSimpsons DAMN WIENER KIDS!]] These films reinforce the bottomless egos of the damn wiener kids of the baby boomers! |
| 707 | -->'''Jerk:''' Myself included. |
| 708 | -->'''Guru:''' And hence, they put asses in seats! |
| 709 | * Their commentary on Jim Evers telling his son to "whack it" (kill a spider), complete with a Jared Fogle reference. |
| 710 | -->'''Guru:''' So his prepubescent sister whacks it for him and...[[EveryoneHasStandards No, I am not reading this]]. |
| 711 | -->'''Jerk:''' C'mon, Guru! |
| 712 | -->'''Guru:''' [[NoodleIncident I'm not going to jail for you fuckers again!]] |
| 713 | * When the characters are walking through a graveyard and the same squishy noises play, Count Jackula points out it’s a StockSoundEffect, and predicts the WilhelmScream might come on next...or, what is actually played over the scene, the Goofy Holler! |
| 714 | * The busts exploding after singing about finding a key. |
| 715 | * This moment: |
| 716 | -->'''Movie!Ramsley:''' If I had to listen to another word from that insufferable fool I think I would have burst. |
| 717 | -->'''Jerk!Ramsley:''' Anyway, sorry I keep complaining about Eddie. [[IsThisThingStillOn Do let me know when the cameras start rolling. What?]] |
| 718 | * Jack's IWantSong about the movie's incredible set and props which somehow ends with him singing about resurrecting Gracey's slaves as zombies and starting a race war. |
| 719 | * Part 3 starts with Jerk explaining that he [[Creator/JamesRolfe refuses to]] [[Film/Ghostbusters2016 review the rest]] [[TakeThat of the movie,]] and that he plans to make several videos on how refuses to review it, and then more about how he [[OverlyLongGag refuses to refuse to make those videos]], and... |
| 720 | * Haley's appearance as Madame Leota. |
| 721 | -->'''Leota''': My name is Leota! Now suck on my ball! |
| 722 | * Jerk’s reaction to ''Film/TheCountryBears'' having a higher Website/RottenTomatoes score than not only ''The Haunted Mansion'', but also ''Film/BatmanVSupermanDawnOfJustice''. |
| 723 | * The end credits show Jerk, Guru, and Jack having a blast at Universal's Halloween Horror Nights, snarking with each other (when Jerk doesn't seem to be genuinely terrified). |
| 724 | -->'''Jerk:''' [[TemptingFate I'll take]] ''[[TemptingFate all]]'' [[TemptingFate of you!]] ''([[JumpScare sees a chainsaw,]]'' ''[[AttackAttackRetreatRetreat immediately]]'' ''[[OhCrap backs down]])'' |
| 725 | [[/folder]] |
| 726 | |
| 727 | [[folder:Harry Potter at Universal Studios Hollywood]] |
| 728 | * Creator/JKRowling's negotiations with Disney, featuring the coked-out executive from the review of ''Film/TheHauntedMansion2003'' and Jerk's “You fool, that'll never work” character. |
| 729 | -->'''Exec 1:''' I'm sorry, are YOU an Imagineer? |
| 730 | -->'''Rowling:''' '''THAT'S NOT EVEN A''' '''''WORD!!!''''' |
| 731 | -->'''Exec 2:''' Says the woman who makes up words left and right! Like “Ministry!” |
| 732 | ** Jerk's character has a ring of keys hanging from his ear, a parody of Imagineer Joe Rohde. |
| 733 | ** And then they meet up with her again...with the same level of respect as before. Though, she probably wouldn't have cared, considering that she has so much money that she uses a Benjamin to mockingly blow her nose. |
| 734 | ** In an attempt to get her on their side, they show off plans for a land based off ''Literature/TheCasualVacancy'', which Rowling admits to not having even ''read''. The land consists only of a vacant lot. "A CASUAL vacant lot!" |
| 735 | * The “Magic”/“Wonder” montage, where every instance of “magic” is replaced with “wonder” and vice versa. |
| 736 | * At one point, Jerk shows a picture that lists Magic Kingdom as Gryffindor, EPCOT Center as Ravenclaw, Animal Kingdom as [[HufflepuffHouse Hufflepuff]], and Disney's Hollywood Studios as Slytherin. |
| 737 | * When discussing the Moaning Myrtle audio in the bathrooms, Jerk points out how creepy it is to have the ghost of a teenage girl watching you while you're on the toilet. |
| 738 | * Jerk's "Proud American Nomaj", a parody country song containing [[{{Eagleland}} every negative American stereotype ever.]] |
| 739 | * Jerk praises Creator/JKRowling's timeless literary masterpieces...[[MyFriendsAndZoidberg and Half-Blood Prince]]. |
| 740 | * There's a RunningGag in which Music/TheGreatLukeSki pops in and claims to like widely-hated things, including ''{{Film/Pixels}}'' and ''WesternAnimation/Cars2''. However, [[EveryoneHasStandards he refuses to say he likes]] [[OnlyInFlorida Florida]]. |
| 741 | * Where's The Fat, Universal?: An allusion to Doug Walker's short film "Where's The Fair Use"? The kicker is the end where the Nostalgia Critic comes along and reveals that Jerk wasn't too fat to ride; he was wearing a sweatshirt around his waist in case it got cold. In California. |
| 742 | * Jerk's Sirius Black parody song returns, and is then replaced by the "Music/JonathanCoulton" version. |
| 743 | * Jerk calling the ''Flight of the Hippogriff'' ride ''Flight of the '''Hypocrite''''': |
| 744 | -->'''Jerk (while flying):''' No one should ever fly ever! Human beings were not meant to fly! A flying person is an abomination against nature! |
| 745 | * Jerk compares the park selling replicas of Voldemort's wand to selling Hitler Ovens to Jews. |
| 746 | * While reviewing Ollivander's Wand Shop, he witnesses a girl use one of the wands to somehow heal a flower using the Aguamenti spell. Jerk is confused and rants about the spell; along with this the water is referred to as "Jesus water" during the rest of the review. |
| 747 | * Jerk states that you can purchase "Only the best [[WesternAnimation/MightyMagiswords Wooden Stick MagiSwords]]" at the wand shop. |
| 748 | * Jerk pokes fun at Dumbledore's monologue from the queue of Forbidden Journey. |
| 749 | -->'''Actual Dumbledore''': There comes a time when we must choose between what is right and what is easy. |
| 750 | -->'''Jerk!Dumbledore''': I, for example, stayed in the closet my whole life when the gay rights movement really could have used the most powerful wizard on Earth, so I recommend easy. [[ShapedLikeItself It's easier!]] |
| 751 | [[/folder]] |
| 752 | |
| 753 | !Other |
| 754 | |
| 755 | [[folder:Commentaries and Riffs]] |
| 756 | * His [[GagDub "commentary"]] of the "Halloween Time at Disneyland" video, a Music/{{Bad Lip Reading}}-esque MindScrew of the highest degree. |
| 757 | --->"[=Runninrunninrunninrunninrunninrunninrunnin=]--STOOOOOPPPP..." |
| 758 | --->"I shall consult my brain at the acceptability of this-- whoop, none." |
| 759 | --->'''Cruella:''' ''(in what's supposed to be the Halloween Time commercial)'' [[WesternAnimation/WreckItRalph I am Zangief, I am bad guy...]] |
| 760 | --->'''Jerk:''' ''(in what's supposed to be the opening shot as Dracula)'' Does anybody wanna buy this caaaape? Gonna make an annoying noise until someone buys this cape. '''Maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa''' |
| 761 | --->''"Your cannonball trajectory, it always gave me head~"'' |
| 762 | --->"List for dinner again? Oh well, nom nom nom..." |
| 763 | --->"I knew I should've taken that left turn at west Philadelphia!" |
| 764 | --->"400 YEARS BEFORE WE HAD SCOTLAND!" ''({{Beat}})'' [[Music/LanaDelRey "It's you, it's you,]] [[RunningGag it's all for you..."]] |
| 765 | --->"Chandelier, chandelier, chandelier, chandelier, chandelier, chandelier, chandelier..." |
| 766 | --->'''Jerk:''' And now, dueling American Pie verses. (Separate verses from the song start playing over each other) |
| 767 | ** The part in the original when the screen goes black while he pretends exciting stuff is happening? It's now a good two minutes of silence. |
| 768 | * His GagDub of an old college sketch he wrote - the original audio was lost, so he filled in the blanks as only he could. The result: [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iwD8fdQczmQ "Look at the Game Show."]] One funny moment in particular: [[ItMakesJustAsMuchSenseInContext sixty chipmunks in a man suit.]] |
| 769 | * The entirety of his, Spazz, and Doggans' riff of the 1955 Disneyland opening telecast, done in the style of ''Podcast/RiffTrax'' and ''Series/MysteryScienceTheater3000.'' |
| 770 | ** "[[ItMakesSenseInContext You think I'm going to trust some nipple over a castle? That's how Brexit started!]]" |
| 771 | ** The RunningGag about Art Linkletter's joke about Irene Dunne adjusting her bustle on the ''Mark Twain''. |
| 772 | ** Another RunningGag is how awful the decorations and costumes of Disney characters look when compared to actual Disney characters. |
| 773 | --->'''Spazz:''' Hey look, it’s Ugly, and Mangly, and Deformy, [[SerialEscalation and Abominationy, and Don’t-Look-At-Me-I’m-A-Monstery,]] [[OverlyLongName and Look-We-Clearly-Had-To-Throw-These-Together-Last-Night-Cut-Us-Some-Freaking-Slacky]] [[OddNameOut and Seymour!]] |
| 774 | ** This bit of genius: |
| 775 | --->'''[[SpecialEffectFailure Deformed!]]Mickey''': [[Literature/OfMiceAndMen Tell me about the rabbits, Walt!]] |
| 776 | --->'''Walt''': [[Creator/UniversalStudios Universal]] stole [[WesternAnimation/OswaldTheLuckyRabbit them]] from me so I made ''you'', the end. |
| 777 | ** When Bob Cummings makes fun of an early 1900s automobile, Jerk says "[[HypocriticalHumor Are you mocking a bygone era for its technological limitations? For shame, sir!]]" |
| 778 | ** They make many jokes about ValuesDissonance, especially during the Frontierland segment. |
| 779 | --->'''Doggans!Davy Crockett''': [Native Americans] are real nice people once you actually talk to 'em, our fault really for invading their land. |
| 780 | ** Davy Crockett takes just a little too long to arrive on cue. |
| 781 | --->'''Art:''' You're a little late getting in. What happened? |
| 782 | --->'''Doggans!Davy Crockett''': I died 119 years ago. What more do you want from me? |
| 783 | ** Davy Crockett "killing" people during the gun-themed song-and-dance number. |
| 784 | --->'''Jerk:''' He shot Peter Pan! |
| 785 | --->'''Doggans:''' Now he'll really never grow up. |
| 786 | ** The guys have a lot of fun with [[HaveAGayOldTime Bob Cummings']] name. They also follow [[HehHehYouSaidX suggestive remarks]] with "But enough about [[Creator/WaltDisney Walt's]] orgy last night." |
| 787 | ** During a rather suggestive dance number in New Orleans Square, Dave says "I don't know why they had to close Brothel Land. It had the best rides in the whole park!" |
| 788 | ** Almost every time UsefulNotes/RonaldReagan shows up, they throw in a "Mr. Disney, tear down this [x]!" |
| 789 | ** Jerk and Doggans GagDub a conversation between Art Linkletter and Danny Thomas. |
| 790 | --->'''Jerk!Art:''' Someday all these kids are going to die in [[UsefulNotes/TheVietnamWar Vietnam]]. Anyway, here's your hooker. |
| 791 | --->'''Doggans!Danny:''' Swell, I've been looking for something to [[DisposableSexWorker strangle all day!]] |
| 792 | --->'''Jerk!Art:''' Just make sure you actually bury this one. Don't just chuck her into the Ride/JungleCruise again. |
| 793 | ** Art loses his microphone and Jerk imagines a what happens next, complete with {{Call Back}}s to previous jokes. He accidentally drops it in the castle moat, where it gets eaten by an alligator and Art wrestles with it to get it back. It bites his arm off and he replaces it with the entire camera crew [[Film/TheHumanCentipede Human Centipede]]-style. Irene Dunne tries to strangle him with her bustle, Davy Crockett shoots him, run over by a woman driver in an Autopia car, blown up by the rocket ship, and torn apart by angry coyotes on angel dust. |
| 794 | ** The appearance of the Jungle Cruise, of course, prompts several references to [[Music/WeirdAlYankovic Skipper Dan]]. |
| 795 | --->'''Doggans!Skipper:''' My name is Dan and I'm ''never'' going to get tired of this job! |
| 796 | --->'''Charlie:''' Look at those hippos, they're wiggling their ears. Just like they've done for the last fifty...seconds. |
| 797 | ** Thinking they can do better, Jerk, Spazz, and Doggans go back in time and remake the special, which results in [[ButterflyEffect Spazz becoming the 40th President of the United States]].[[note]]UsefulNotes/RonaldReagan was in the original telecast[[/note]] |
| 798 | --->'''Jerk''': Well... ''that'' got a little out of hand. |
| 799 | --->'''Doggans''': What do you think, sir? |
| 800 | --->'''[[Podcast/RiffTrax Kevin Murphy]]''': [[Film/PodPeople It stinks!]] |
| 801 | * [[https://youtu.be/rQk6MI1w5_I The 30 Years of EPCOT commentary]]: |
| 802 | ** The commentary is pretty straightforward for the most part, but things get interesting after Tony starts playing [[Music/BruceSpringsteen "My City of Ruins"]], a song he wanted to underscore a montage but, following Hurricane Sandy, [[SincerityMode he thought it'd be in poor taste to use it]]. It makes for pleasant background music, until Figment pops up and begins wreaking havoc, leading Tony to try and kill him in [[SerialEscalation increasingly violent ways.]] Once the deed is done, the music continues playing from the "With these hands" part...then a chorus of Tonys (and [[BackFromTheDead Figment]]) start singing along and Tony sings some trivia about Eisner to the tune of the song: |
| 803 | ---> “So coming up right here is the Eisner montage, tying into the 10 Years of DCA video depicting Michael Eisner as a Bond villain with the music Hellfire from [[WesternAnimation/TheHunchbackofNotreDameDisney Hunchback of Notre Dame]] which, by the way, was Michael Eisner’s favorite movie that he greenlit while at Disney. I don’t know what that says about the man psychologically, I just think it’s an interesting piece of tri-yeah! This was fun to edit, yo! Uh, finding metaphorical imagery for the rise of for the rise of Michael Eisner! So come on, come on, come on, rise up!” |
| 804 | ** [[BigLippedAlligatorMoment Then there's a record scratch, the song ends, and the commentary resumes as normal.]] |
| 805 | * [[https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=R6rYhVOAcBw The ABC Goes to Disneyland commentary]]: |
| 806 | ** Tony saying he wished his show had a budget so he could put elephants and acrobats during the “Jim Belushi drowning in a sea of diarrhea” song. |
| 807 | ** Once, Tony and his friends were in line for Indiana Jones Adventure when it broke down. He and his friends started to sing Bohemian Rhapsody, when after the song, some teenage girls sang along with them and asked them if they had any Taylor Swift songs on their phone. |
| 808 | ** One episode of a show suggested for a future “ABC Goes to Disney World“ episode is “Arthur the Aardvark Goes to Disney World”. |
| 809 | |
| 810 | * [[https://youtu.be/azOxMgCzp3s The Back to the Future: The Ride commentary]]: |
| 811 | ** Whenever Jerk has nothing interesting to say, he does Dueling Bob Gales. At one point, he does Dueling Dueling Bob Gales, which ends up making the world explode. |
| 812 | ** Jerk says he found an unintentionally funny Back to the Future-related ad promoting the ability to buy previously viewed VHS tapes of the second film. After being played once, it is played backwards, super fast, and fast and backwards. |
| 813 | ** The beginning of Part 3 of the commentary: |
| 814 | ---> “Commentary, commentary, rah rah rah! Who cares, no one, sis boom bah! This title was constructed entirely out of twigs and dead hookers and then made to look like a simple computer graphic title. I could’ve just used a simple computer graphic title in the first place, but that wouldn’t have been fun!” |
| 815 | * [[https://youtu.be/Jx19p0t0584 The Escape from Tomorrow commentary:]] |
| 816 | ** Nicholas thinks that they are doing a commentary for The Death of a Porn Crew. |
| 817 | ** It is revealed that Zack actually brought the Pinocchio costume seen in the group circle to [=MAGFest=] on his own volition. |
| 818 | ** The story of how Nicholas texted David a picture of the Escape from Tomorrow DVD at Target. This is made even more hilarious by the fact that when David and Nicholas had to watch the film, they could only find pirated copies of it online. |
| 819 | [[/folder]] |
| 820 | |
| 821 | [[folder:Vlogs]] |
| 822 | * "Soarin' Over Frozen VLOG" |
| 823 | ** While watching the Frozen show, the jumping sled got stuck and the actor said "This is a long jump!" After a brief pause due to technical difficulties, the show continued and the actor said "Woah, I blacked out for a second there." |
| 824 | ** Mikey Insanity does a Creator/PatrickWarburton impression by saying, [[BadBadActing in his normal voice]], "Hi, I'm Patrick Warburton." |
| 825 | ** Luke thinks the ride is about getting the [[Literature/LordOfTheRings One Ring to Mordor]] so that Soarin can't get his hands on it. |
| 826 | ** Spazzmaster ends the video by singing the [[BerserkButton "It's a Small World" song]], followed by a MusicalSlapstickMontage of the Jerk angrily chasing him around the park. |
| 827 | * In "[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lEtBofYQLHs Some Jerk Visits Knott's Berry Farm]]", a theme park actor playing an outlaw named "Tiny Mayfield" actually recognizes Jerk & Co. and becomes part of the show. |
| 828 | ** In a performance with another cast member, Tiny Mayfield gets cornered by a man in a saloon for stealing his gold, and the man threatens to rat him out to his posse outside. |
| 829 | ---> '''Tiny:''' "I-I got a better idea!" |
| 830 | ---> '''Man:''' "Alright, let's hear it." |
| 831 | ---> '''Tiny:''' "Why don't you tell them I'm in the other saloon?" |
| 832 | ---> '''Man:''' "...there's another saloon?" |
| 833 | ---> '''Tiny:''' "Yeah!...it's called the [[Ride/DisneyThemeParks Golden Horseshoe]]!" |
| 834 | ---> ''(The other actor goes quiet for a brief moment, then gives an exasperated [[{{Facepalm}} facepalm]])'' |
| 835 | ** Bonus points for Spazzmaster and Haley going hysterical in the background. There's a perfect frame in the video at around 16:32 that's almost worthy of a renaissance painting. |
| 836 | ** Mayfield gets locked up and Jerk pretends to be his lawyer. |
| 837 | --->'''Jerk:''' If they tell you to sign a confession, don't do it. |
| 838 | --->'''Mayfield:''' Well I can't even read, so that won't be a problem. |
| 839 | * Ride/GuardiansOfTheGalaxyMissionBreakout VLOG! |
| 840 | ** Due to a pause at the top of the ride, some people scream a little too soon. Or, as Tony calls it, [[SpeedSex "Premature exclamation".]] |
| 841 | ** The RunningGag of how Tony never gets [[Music/TheJacksonFive "Want You Back"]] (though he does get it eventually). |
| 842 | ** While discussing his dislike of rides with big scary drops, Charlie recounts how he nearly hit his brother in the head with a guitar and chased him with a baseball bat after being startled. Then he preemptively tells the others not to startle him. |
| 843 | ** Ian quotes [[Film/GuardiansOfTheGalaxy2014 Yondu's rant]] about how he stopped his crew from eating Star-Lord as a child. |
| 844 | --->'''Jerk:''' That's just what [[UsefulNotes/DonaldTrump Fred Trump]] said to his kids every morning. |
| 845 | ** When the vlog ends, Tony plays all six songs at the same time over the end credits. |
| 846 | * [[Ride/GuardiansOfTheGalaxyMissionBreakout Guardians Of The Galaxy: Monsters After Dark (+ Halloween at DCA) VLOG!]] |
| 847 | ** Ryan says the sprinkle-covered Decorated Churros are just Disney's way of selling month-old churros that are "decorated" that way. |
| 848 | --->'''Jerk:''' Hey, kids! Wanna make your vomit confusing? |
| 849 | ** They point out that [[Franchise/{{Cars}} Doc Hudson]] has a Dia de los Muertos shrine even though he's still alive in ''Radiator Springs Racers''. Dave speculates that the other cars made this in advance and are plotting to murder him. |
| 850 | ** They mock the pure NightmareFuel of an undead car that crashed so badly it was wrapped around a tree. |
| 851 | ** Jerk mishears Rocket Raccoon's "I gotta get [Baby Groot] out of there before he gets ate!" as "before he gets AIDS!" |
| 852 | --->'''Jerk:''' What kind of monsters have you got in here? |
| 853 | ** Their cast member said "Did you see the 'Enter at your own risk' sign outside? Well, don't worry about it!" |
| 854 | ** [[CallBack "OOPS! GHOST YONDU!"]] |
| 855 | ** Jerk's rendition of [[LiteralMinded Drax]]'s confusion at Christmas. |
| 856 | --->'''Jerk!Drax:''' Why would you deck halls? A hall is an absence of things, you wouldn't punch that. What town is Santa Claus coming to? The town doesn't specify that. |
| 857 | * Fantasmic! (2017) and other Rivers Of America updates VLOG! |
| 858 | ** Spazz's reaction to the beginning of the vlog: "Oh God, he's doing it again." |
| 859 | ** Jerk suggests that since he got a bunch of new subscribers from his Webvideo/NostalgiaCritic crossover, they should avoid too many inside jokes right before he, Doggans, and Spazz launch into "Ketchup! Ketchup! Ketchup ketchup ketchupketchupketchup..." |
| 860 | ** Their LamePunReaction to the "ear" pun on the Disneyland Railroad. |
| 861 | ** Zach brings up the spinning rock from ''Captain Eo'' and Jerk laments it like TheOneThatGotAway. Then he apologizes for bringing up an inside joke. |
| 862 | ** Jerk points out Tom Sawyer Island's "handcrafted, log-cabin, pioneer [[AcceptableBreaksFromReality accessibility lifts]]." Doggans says that UsefulNotes/DavyCrockett used a lift like this at the Alamo. |
| 863 | ** The [[Ride/CountryBearJamboree "childhood photo" of Mike Huckabee.]] |
| 864 | ** Spazz does a [[Ride/JourneyIntoImagination Figment]] impersonation, then tries to throw himself in the river as penance for making [[RunningGag an inside joke]]. Hayley tries to stop him because his outfit is dry-clean only. |
| 865 | ** Spazz suggests adding Figment to Fantasmic. Jerk grabs him by the collar and says "You shut your whore mouth." |
| 866 | * The [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rb3z1NlnBOk Incredicoaster/Pixar Pier vlog]]. |
| 867 | ** The "In Memoriam" screen for Pizza Oom Mow Mow. |
| 868 | ** The "This Asshole show" clip, where Jerk stops the vlog dead in its tracks to roast a photobomber, is solid gold. |
| 869 | ** Their discussion of the pre-show video, where the Incredibles [[BetterThanABareBulb basically acknowledge that the Incredicoaster is a cheap, lazy overlay of California Screamin'.]] |
| 870 | ** Brianna realizing that Disney used her "Put more sketch artists in stores" idea ''after'' she quit. She shows how she feels by [[TranquilFury putting on a huge smile and pointing to a plush]] [[WesternAnimation/InsideOut Anger.]] |
| 871 | ** The gang making fun of the meaninglessness of the name "Pixar Pal-A-Round" (a lazy Pixar overlay of Mickey's Fun Wheel that has little to do with any Pixar movie), by turning "pallin' around" into a zombie-like MadnessMantra. |
| 872 | ** The return of the RunningGag where Music/TheGreatLukeSki gets pushed off camera into a pane of glass by Jerk. |
| 873 | --->'''Jerk:''' He has such a pushable face. |
| 874 | ** At "Flik's Fun Fair", Morgan excitedly cries out "IS EVERYBODY UNDERWHELMED?!" |
| 875 | ** Spazz sums up his opinion by quoting {{Music/Bastille}}: "If you close your eyes, does it almost seem like nothing's changed at all?" |
| 876 | ** Morgan squees over a plushie cockroach from ''WesternAnimation/WallE''. |
| 877 | --->'''Morgan:''' You eat garbage and literally live in shit! |
| 878 | * Ride/StarWarsGalaxysEdge is Awesome Actually |
| 879 | ** "George Lucas" talks to Jerk's "You fool, that'll never work!" character about his plan to make Star Wars movies that make so much money off nostalgia and mystique that it doesn't matter how good they are. [[OOCIsSeriousBusiness For once, Jerk's character says it's a brilliant idea.]] |
| 880 | ** [[WebVideo/WhatWeHadToWatch Il Neige]] types a comment on the internet saying he liked ''Film/TheLastJedi'' only to get hit with a backdraft by mostly angry men. Then he says Rey and Kylo as a couple sounds silly and gets a backdraft of mostly angry women. The bit then segues into a TakeThat towards Star Wars' fans and an explanation why comments are disabled. |
| 881 | ** Doggans mistakes the model for the real thing. "What is this, a Galaxy's Edge [[{{Film/Zoolander}} for ants?]]" |
| 882 | ** Luke calls the Hungry Bear Restaurant a WretchedHive of scum and villainy. |
| 883 | --->'''Luke:''' You notice how you have four limbs? If you want to keep it that way, be cautious. |
| 884 | ** Doggans says he distrusts the Disney app and says he's going to throw his phone in the river. Jerk dares him to do it and says he wants footage of it. |
| 885 | ** Luke Ski complains about people making Star Wars references all his life because his name was Luke. |
| 886 | --->'''Dave:''' Everybody always tried to make sci-fi references based on my name but every time they tried to think of one, they just turned to me and said "[[Film/TwoThousandOneASpaceOdyssey I'm sorry, Dave. I'm afraid I can't do that.]]" |
| 887 | ** A cast member asks the gang what planet they're visiting from. Doggans answers California, a desert planet that's running out of water. |
| 888 | ** Katie calls the Ronto Roasters "The Ewok's Cannibalistic Jamboree." |
| 889 | ** Doggans suggests throwing a blue milkshake at the stormtroopers, a reference to [[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Milkshaking this]]. |
| 890 | ** The group is gushing about Smuggler's Run only to get interrupted by nearby droids. |
| 891 | ** The stormtroopers hassle Doggans again. He tells them he's trying to get drunk but can't get into the cantina. |
| 892 | ** Jerk points out the cantina is the first time Disneyland has served alcohol outside of Club 33 but he's sure it won't have any adverse effects. GilliganCut to Jerk drunkenly yelling "Down with the First Order!" at the stormtroopers. |
| 893 | --->'''Morgan:''' He's thoroughly crazy! |
| 894 | --->'''Trooper:''' That's affirmative. |
| 895 | ** Jerk and Morgan then have a sarcastic conversation about the importance of talking to the First Order using logical arguments to stop them from blowing up planets. |
| 896 | ** "[[SelfDeprecation And now, in a bit that didn't age very well]]" |
| 897 | --->'''Jerk:''' Whoever thought up the reservation system is a genius who deserves to own all of Disney. |
| 898 | ** The commercial for old toy lightsabers, which are just flashlights with floppy plastic shafts. |
| 899 | --->'''Caption:''' Look, we accidentally bought a warehouse full of sex toys and these glow-in-the-dark dildos ain't gonna unload themselves. |
| 900 | ** Jerk acts out the remake of Aladdin with a Salacious Crumb puppet on his shoulder voiced by Luke's Creator/GilbertGottfried impression. |
| 901 | --->'''Jerk:''' If you get a big zit, don't scratch it. It just makes it worse. |
| 902 | ** Morgan "knights" Jerk with her lightsaber, naming him "[[EuphemisticNames Sir Jerksalot]]." |
| 903 | --->'''Luke:''' The title of your sex tape! |
| 904 | ** Luke and Briana flee from the First Order. Briana suggests they get off the planet using the Rocket Rods, which then explode. She then says "[[Film/TheForceAwakens The garbage will do]]" and they run for Smuggler's Run. |
| 905 | ** Briana says the blue milk tastes like toothpaste |
| 906 | ** Ian, a cast member they befriended, is a former Ride/StarTours operator so he made up a whole backstory about how he used to work for Star Tours, left after they got entangled with Rebels, and moved to Batuu to work for Hondo. |
| 907 | ** Jerk discusses the delay of "Rise of the Resistance" |
| 908 | --->'''Jerk:''' It's taking the Resistance a little time to rise. Star Wars is forty years old. It happens. |
| 909 | --->'''Morgan:''' [[DontExplainTheJoke That was an ED joke!]] |
| 910 | ** Doggans says the sausage in the Ronto Wrap is a Gungan dick. |
| 911 | ** Doggans related a story about standing in line for the cantina. A man behind him asks a cast member how to get his cantina reservation and she says to give his "datapad number" because she can't say "phone", which only adds to his confusion. |
| 912 | ** Jerk: "I'm an angry young white man threatened by female superheroes. Do you think space fascism is for me?" |
| 913 | ** Luke meets R2-D2 |
| 914 | --->'''Luke:''' I wanted to say something to him but I didn't. [[{{Pun}} I guess I have a bad motivator.]] |
| 915 | ** One cast member says "Our leader is a [[UsefulNotes/DonaldTrump large orange slug]] and [[TakeThat I hear that's common]]." |
| 916 | ** Jerk tries to [[RunningGag push Luke off screen into a plate of glass]] again but this time Luke [[NoSell refuses to budge]] and [[Film/TheLastJedi brushes some dust off his shoulder]]. |
| 917 | ** Jerk ends the vlog with a reference to the "Earth all along!" monologue from ''Film/PlanetOfTheApes1968'' while a [[FunnyBackgroundEvent little kid in the background looks at him in confusion.]] |
| 918 | ** TheStinger is an outtake from the "Reylo backlash" sketch. Jerk yells "Cut!" but Morgan continues yelling a little longer about the importance of making "two space wizards kiss!" |
| 919 | * Hey, DCA Still Exists Too! |
| 920 | ** Morgan is so shocked at the reminder that DCA exists that she dies. Then she comes back as a zombie and chases Jerk around. |
| 921 | ** In a callback to a similar gag by Luke Ski, Katie uses her hand as a Muppet. |
| 922 | ** Garrett jokes that ''Ride/MickeysPhilharmagic'' features Donald Duck more than Mickey. [[Ride/MuppetVision3D "It's called a salute to all IP but mostly Donald Duck."]] |
| 923 | ** The aspect ratio of Philharmagic is squashed. Dave compares it to watching Lawrence of Arabia on an [=iPhone=] |
| 924 | ** Morgan wears a hat made to look like Donald Duck's ass and legs. "Why does everyone keep calling me an asshat?" |
| 925 | ** "I'm a grown-ass man and my job involves typing out the phrase '[[ARareSentence They've upgraded the animatronic butt.]]' Livin' the dream, people." |
| 926 | ** When Soarin' Around the World is temporarily replaced with Soarin' Over California, Jerk suggests replacing the TravelMontage with a montage of California. Morgan suggests they include live traffic updates. |
| 927 | ** [[EverythingIsRacist Jerk accuses the ride of being anti-Semitic]] when he misreads "Yosemite" as "Yo, Semite." |
| 928 | ** Jerk praises the transitions from Soarin' Over California for being clever without going full ''Series/HomeImprovement''." Cut to a ''Home Improvement''-style transition from Garrett to Katie. |
| 929 | ** Jerk criticizes Soarin' for lacking any [[Film/EscapeFromTomorrow black-and-white naked tits.]] |
| 930 | ** Jerk points out the park was too cheap to get Richard Kind to reprise his role as [[WesternAnimation/InsideOut Bing Bong]], which he finds especially ironic considering he helped promote the park back when it first opened. Katie says they must've gotten his evil twin, Richard Mean. |
| 931 | ** Jerk photoshops Anger's face over UsefulNotes/DonaldTrump in the infamous [[https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/trump-yelling-at-lawn-mowing-boy lawn mower meme]]. |
| 932 | ** Jerk's existential crisis wondering if we're all just figments of Riley's imagination, ending with him going insane and running away screaming as confused parkgoers look on. Followed by a notice saying that Tony Goldmark was never seen again and if you have any information on his whereabouts, "lock that information in a safe and drop that safe into an ocean." |
| 933 | [[/folder]] |
| 934 | |
| 935 | [[folder:State of the Parks]] |
| 936 | * One of his best [[ShoutOut shout-outs]], courtesy of his ''State of the Parks'' video about the possibility of a ''Franchise/GuardiansOfTheGalaxy'' ride replacing the California ''Twilight Zone'' Tower of Terror: |
| 937 | --->'''Jerk:'''...and, to make a long story short- |
| 938 | --->'''Cast of ''Film/{{Clue}}'':''' [[SelfDeprecation Too late.]] |
| 939 | * The 2016 recap of State of the Parks: |
| 940 | ** Jerk opens the video mentioning how awful the past year had been, and says that they shouldn't have wasted an entire year's worth of miracles [[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2016_World_Series on baseball]]. |
| 941 | ** "Harrison Ford himself, looking almost like he wanted to be there..." |
| 942 | ** Jerk reveals that Disney parks have stopped selling toy guns. Cut to eleven clips of Jerk using the guns as props during his prior reviews. "[[MyGodWhatHaveIDone Did I cause this?]]" Cue Sarah [=McLachlan=] music, followed by Jerk redirecting his energy to protesting the parks' use of gators after a gator attack was the most reported Disney death in 2016. |
| 943 | ** "Anyway, in lighter news- AH ZOMBIE!" |
| 944 | ** Jerk {{Corpsing}} as he talks about plans to build a park in Animal Kingdom based on the film series ''Franchise/{{Avatar}}''. |
| 945 | ** His choice for credits music: "[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d0Eqwjfnoos Rippy the Gator]]" by the Arrogant Worms, a reference to the [[BlackComedy 2016 alligator attacks in Disney World]]. |
| 946 | * "State of the Parks: Theme Park News of 2017 and 2018": |
| 947 | ** Jerk points out one article whose headline is "Disney Erects Giant [[Franchise/ToyStory Woody]] at Hollywood Studios." |
| 948 | --->'''Jerk''': [[HehHehYouSaidX Are we seriously not doing phrasing anymore?!]] |
| 949 | ** Jerk launches into a monologue about a "demon" that must be faced before cutting to the UsefulNotes/DonaldTrump animatronic at the Hall of Presidents, complete with a fire effect and OminousLatinChanting. |
| 950 | ** His end credit music is Music/TheMountainGoats' "This Year" sung by [[Website/ChannelAwesome Tamara Lynn Chambers]] (specifically the lyrics "I'm going to make it through this year if it kills me") over a video of a Walt Disney World dragon float on fire. |
| 951 | ** He ends the video by [[INeedAFreakingDrink opening a flask and taking a drink]] at the prospect of researching videos about UsefulNotes/DonaldTrump and the removal of the sex-slave auction at ''Ride/PiratesOfTheCaribbean''. |
| 952 | ** Jerk tells the story of how pro-Trump protesters bravely unfurled a Trump banner at Disney World...for about ninety seconds before they were chased out by security. |
| 953 | * "The Hall of Presidents: Attack of the Hideous [[UsefulNotes/DonaldTrump Trumpbot]]!" starts with an OpeningCrawl that's a massive TakeThat to anyone who doesn't want him to get political. |
| 954 | ** Jerk points out that, technically EPCOT now has a Russia pavilion [[note]]A reference to accusations that Donald Trump is a PuppetKing for Russia.[[/note]] |
| 955 | ** Jerk lists several of the bad things Trump has done, including mocking assault victims, feuding with gold-star families, endorsing a pedophile, and [[ArsonMurderAndJaywalking starring in a Pizza Hut commercial]]. |
| 956 | ** Jerk struggles to say the words "President Donald J. Trump" and goes absolutely insane before he can. His freakout includes the "You maniacs!" rant from Film/PlanetOfTheApes1968, throwing rolls of paper towels[[note]]A reference to something Trump did in Puerto Rico after a natural disaster[[/note]], and licking a gun. |
| 957 | *** Someone edited the video so the freakout is set to "[[SanitySlippageSong Combine Harvester]]" from Linkara's show, ''WebVideo/AtopTheFourthWall''. |
| 958 | ** Any time Jerk speaks as Trump, he colors his face orange. |
| 959 | ** Jerk uses a LaughTrack...which turns out to be actual audio of the UsefulNotes/UnitedNations laughing at Trump. |
| 960 | ** The ride starts talking about increasing income inequality. |
| 961 | --->'''Jerk:''' They ''definitely'' didn't tell Trump about this part. |
| 962 | ** Jerk realizing the ride's several {{Take That}}s at Trump and the Republicans. The ride positively depicts poor Americans crying out for "change", the CatchPhrase of UsefulNotes/BarackObama. UsefulNotes/JimmyCarter makes an appearance but recent Republican Presidents UsefulNotes/RichardNixon, UsefulNotes/GeraldFord, and UsefulNotes/GeorgeHWBush are omitted while UsefulNotes/RonaldReagan appears only briefly to say "Tear down this [[UsefulNotes/BerlinWall wall]]!", possibly a TakeThat to Trump's proposed wall on the US/Mexico border. |
| 963 | * In "Top 15 Attractions That Closed In 2017": |
| 964 | ** Jerk repeatedly mocks an old commercial for Stitch's Great Escape by using a belch as an adjective. He also says most fans hate it so much they consider it an "irredeemable Holocaust-abortion." |
| 965 | ** He also points out how long the closure of Stitch's Great Escape has been dragged out by fast-forwarding to 2068. An elderly Jerk on a post-apocalyptic background says ''this'' will finally be the year they close it. |
| 966 | ** Commenters take Jerk's use of the phrase "[[TheyChangedItNowItSucks Cocoon of nostalgia]]" and turn it into a parody of "Hakuna Matata." |
| 967 | ** Part 2 begins with a fake ''WebVideo/OneMovieLater'' where everyone rants and raves about how great ''Literature/FiftyShadesFreed'' was. |
| 968 | ** The RunningGag where parks keep unpopular attractions open because "They had nothing to replace it with!". |
| 969 | ** "[[Film/Terminator2JudgmentDay If you're in the future, and you're fightin' Skynet]], [[Franchise/{{Ghostbusters}} who you gonna call? MOVEBUSTERS!]]" |
| 970 | * The State of the Parks for Ride/PiratesOfTheCaribbean: We Wants The Redhead involves Jerk moderating a debate between a pirate captain (Captain Edgesword) and a progressive Millennial (Tryhard Goodman) regarding the replacement of the infamous Wench Auction scene with a Treasure Auction, and turning the redhead into one of the pirates to appease MoralGuardians accusing Disney of glorifying human trafficking and objectifying women. |
| 971 | ** Tryhard Goodman's outfit, which includes a hot pink Resist T-shirt and pussy hat. |
| 972 | ** Captain Edgesword laments everyone getting too easily offended while [[HypocriticalHumor screaming and bursting into tears]]. |
| 973 | --->'''Tryhard Goodman''': Sounds like you're the one who was offended, my good bitch. |
| 974 | ** Throughout the video, Tony has played [[ActingForTwo three characters]]: himself, Tryhard, and Edgesword. Then we cut to Doggans, who watches Tony sitting at his table, alone, talking to himself. |
| 975 | --->'''Doggans''': [[CallBack Like I said. It does things to you.]] |
| 976 | * The State of the Parks for the ''Ride/SplashMountain'' retheming based on ''WesternAnimation/ThePrincessAndTheFrog'': |
| 977 | ** Jerk's over-the-top celebration of his [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8zIPq8jpm8g video mocking the Disney World "Welcome Home" commercial]] being mentioned on the news. |
| 978 | *** ONE USER! "[[Film/TronLegacy We do, indeed have in our midst, a user!]]" |
| 979 | ** [[ItMakesSenseInContext "Why is all the syrup racist?!"]] |
| 980 | ** The unhinged [[WesternAnimation/AliceInWonderland Mad Hatter-esque]] rant about the Culture Wars. |
| 981 | --->'''Jerk:''' Culture war is love, culture war is life! |
| 982 | ** Jerk's montage of people singing Zip-A-Dee-Doo-Dah, which ends with Darlene Love's powerful rendition of the song [[AntiClimax followed by former Speaker of the House John Boehner singing it during a press conference]]. |
| 983 | ** He mentions several "barely-acknowledged historical relics" such as ''Film/SoDearToMyHeart'', ''Victory Through Air Power'', and ''Film/TheNutcrackerAndTheFourRealms'', which came out ''two years'' earlier. |
| 984 | ** After comparing [[Film/SongOfTheSouth the movie's]] attitude towards race to ''Film/GetOut2017'', he follows it by a CrossingTheLineTwice parody of the song "Everybody's Got a Laughing Place" with the Sunken Place. |
| 985 | --->'''Jerk:''' ''Everybody's got a Sunken Place, a Sunken Place, to float through space, stir that tea, pretty soon he'll see, that he's been kidnapped for his race!'' |
| 986 | ** After playing several dull ''Film/SongOfTheSouth'' clips, Jerk calls it [[SuddenlyShouting "A PULSE POUNDING ADRENALINE RUSH!!!"]] |
| 987 | ** Jerk's reaction to an old clip of Disneyland's Indian Village. |
| 988 | --->'''Jerk:''' [[{{Facepalm}} Can this company please not racist itself for five bloody minutes?]] |
| 989 | ** Bear ''Deliverance'' [[note]]An aborted idea for Splash Mountain where each vehicle was equipped with guns and a bear sheriff sent you into the woods to shoot at redneck bear bootleggers[[/note]] |
| 990 | ** Michael Eisner refusing to put the word "Dixie" on any Disney property. GilliganCut to a commercial for Dixie Landings Resort Hotel, which changed its name nine years later. |
| 991 | --->'''Jerk:''' And yet that name still lasted twice as long as the actual Confederacy. |
| 992 | ** Jerk is so appalled by the Zip-A-Dee-Doo-Dah rap that he time travels back to 1986 to beg Jesse Jackson to protest the re-release of ''Song of the South''. [[note]]Eisner tried to stop the creation of a Song of the South ride by re-releasing the movie in theaters and saying he'd stop the project if he heard of any protest. No notable ones ever happened.[[/note]] |
| 993 | ** One of Jerk's Twitter followers called Splash Mountain "VideoGame/FiveNightsAtFreddys doing a minstrel show." |
| 994 | ** #BLAMETHEPOSSUM |
| 995 | ** Jerk mentions the "Celebrate Black Stories" tab on Disney Plus, which includes [[Film/{{Kazaam}} a movie where a white kid smugly says he owns a genie played by a black man]]. |
| 996 | ** Jerk, wearing an American flag hat and using a fake Southern accent, mourns Splash Mountain as another Confederate monument being torn down. [[AngryFistShake "ANTIFAAAAAA!"]] |
| 997 | [[/folder]] |
| 998 | |
| 999 | [[folder:Outtakes]] |
| 1000 | * Season 1: |
| 1001 | ** Kill Bozby apparently created a ''Film/GhostDad 3'' that included a "wacky abortion" scene. |
| 1002 | ** Spazz on Star Tours: "Wouldn't it be great if for once nothing went wrong? [[BaitAndSwitchComparison And I'm not just bitching about my own life here.]]" |
| 1003 | ** Jerk almost kisses the bust of Abraham Lincoln and a poster of Captain Eo. |
| 1004 | ** Morgan suddenly letting out a bloodcurdling scream. Jerk is just shocked. |
| 1005 | ** Phil Buni saying Florida is America's limp, flaccid dick. He also says Florida sucks except for [[TheOneThingIDontHateAboutYou that Harry Potter park. And Sea World. Oh, and Disney World, of course!]] |
| 1006 | ** Jerk making an angry, screaming face for an attraction that pastes guests' faces into a video (Spaceship Earth). |
| 1007 | ** "Voldemort" harassing camera operator Zach Breman. |
| 1008 | ** Morgan's fake foreign accent. [[WhatTheHellIsThatAccent Even she isn't sure what that accent is.]] |
| 1009 | ** Kill claims he was [[BlackComedyRape gangraped]] by the ''WesternAnimation/{{Rugrats}}''. |
| 1010 | ** Spazz's swearing in the Small World review. Pissburgers! Figment! |
| 1011 | ** Morgan almost attacks Spazz for mentioning Figment but he reminds her they are on syndicated airwaves. |
| 1012 | ** Jerk's uncle Paul refuses to get pushed off screen on cue and keeps talking about Jerk's OldShame parody song. |
| 1013 | ** Paul goes over everything inaccurate with the ''Columbia''. |
| 1014 | ** Jerk on Disney princess piggy banks. "You put coins in their butts. [[NWordPrivileges I had no idea they were Jewish]]." |
| 1015 | * Season 2 |
| 1016 | ** Kill Bozby claims that the video was found clutched in a severed hand found in a garbage can. |
| 1017 | ** Jerk's montage of the many, ''many'' photobombers he has to deal with, complete with slow-motion and {{Scare Chord}}s. |
| 1018 | ** Jerk gets photobombed by a WesternAnimation/SpongeBobSquarePants walkaround character. |
| 1019 | ** Il Neige says he sees Creator/AnnaKendrick in a bikini. Turns out it's just some seaweed. |
| 1020 | ** Spazz snaps WesternAnimation/{{Dumbo}}'s neck as "Baby Mine" plays in the background. |
| 1021 | ** Kill says he would stuff his misbehaving kids inside the rectum of a dead elephant. |
| 1022 | ** Jerk and Il Neige's improvised blues song at the end where Jerk, among other things, claims to eat several live deer per day. |
| 1023 | * Season 3: |
| 1024 | ** Hayley distracts Spazz by pretending to flash him. |
| 1025 | ** Spazz's deadpan "hang-on dance". |
| 1026 | ** Jerk tells Hayley that her Madame Leota needs to be "More wrath of God and less blaxploitation." |
| 1027 | ** Due to his chronic ScheduleSlip, Jerk had Horror Guru record several versions of the "It's [month]" line. |
| 1028 | ** Erika's shocked reaction to Nicholas Ganssle making fun of Leslie Burke's death in ''Literature/BridgeToTerabithia''. |
| 1029 | ** The pretend arguments during the JK Rowling sketch get so intense that someone pokes their head into the conference room to check on them. |
| 1030 | ** Spazzmaster's lines as Ronald Reagan: |
| 1031 | --->"It is an honor to be inaugurated as the 40th President of these United States. Rock on!" |
| 1032 | --->"Cheers. Admiration. Praise. Synonyms." |
| 1033 | * Kill Bozby: The Complete saga |
| 1034 | ** Tony Wiseau, the alternate universe twin brother of Creator/TommyWiseau who ate his brother in the womb. In our universe, Tommy ate Tony in the womb. |
| 1035 | |
| 1036 | [[/folder]] |
| 1037 | |
| 1038 | [[folder:Other stuff]] |
| 1039 | |
| 1040 | * His "feud" with Ryan Hipp of ''That Show.'' A video retrospective of the faux-feud concludes with them realizing that [[ShaggyDogStory the whole thing was pointless]], [[SelfDeprecation as neither of them are huge internet celebrities.]] |
| 1041 | * Jerk's video "Take the #[=CatsChallenge=]", an over-the-top, angry parody of toxic ''Franchise/StarWars'' fans. In it, he calls on all "real" Star Wars fans to watch ''{{Film/Cats}}'' rather than ''Film/TheRiseOfSkywalker'', both of which come out on the same day. |
| 1042 | ** "''Film/TheLastJedi'' was literally the Holocaust!" |
| 1043 | ** "Creator/KathleenKennedy aborted me!" |
| 1044 | ** "My village was burned down by an army of [[Creator/RianJohnson Ruin Johnsons!]]" |
| 1045 | ** "Creator/LauraDern's hair worships the devil!" |
| 1046 | ** "Creator/JJAbrams directed ''Film/Super8''! ...[[ArsonMurderAndJaywalking and it was]] [[SoOkayItsAverage okay]]." |
| 1047 | |
| 1048 | [[/folder]] |
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