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1Funny moments from WebVideo/{{Retsupurae}} can be found '''[[Funny/RetsupuraeSlowbeefAndDiabetus here]]'''.
2----
3[[foldercontrol]]
4
5[[folder:Ridley]]
6* Pretty much anything involving Ridley. From the first encounter in ''Metroid Prime 3'':
7-->"[[NotInTheFace Don't shoot me in the mouth!]] Whatever you do, [[BlatantLies that's my least vulnerable spot]]! My wings... remember how they burned off? Hit 'em... [[EnemyScan are you scannin' me]] [[ViolationOfCommonSense in freefall now]]? How do you even do that? Wait... are we ''[[TalkingIsAFreeAction readin']]?'' Come on!"
8* During one of the cutscenes shortly after:
9-->'''Caption:''' --[[AC:One month later]]--\
10'''"Ridley":''' I'm still fallin'!
11* And then there's the [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TLsOd6YJ5P8 Omega Ridley]] boss fight late in ''Prime 3''. 29 minutes of interpreting his erratic battle movements, to the point that slowbeef is '''crying''' with laughter.
12** From when it starts:
13--->"Well, it's about time! I just finished fallin'! This is where that tunnel let out! Your timin' is poifect!"
14** In response to his animation for being knocked down:
15--->'''slowbeef''': Ridley, are you an idiot?!\
16'''"Ridley"''': I just got back from a... night out. Sorry. You got some, like, space-aspirin, or something? Just time-out for a minute!
17** "I was designed at 4:00 AM! It's called crunch time! My original name was Procrastination Ridley!"
18** His stunned and vulnerable animation (standing while waving his arms around) causes many a busted gut. Diabetus likens it to Ridley being excited on Christmas morning and frantically opening his presents.
19--->"Ooga booga, I'm Ridley, are you scared, Samus?!"\
20"WUUUUUUUUAAAAAAAAUUUUUHHHHHHHH!"\
21"You got me ''Metroid Prime''? FUCK YOU!"
22** Ridley outright insults [[UsefulNotes/XBox360 Kinect]] and [[UsefulNotes/PlayStation3 Move]] (though for the former it's less about poor or gimmicky design and more about being incompatible with his size and wingspan). This is followed by pointing out every flaw in ''VideoGame/HeavyRain'', including how the Origami Killer couldn't possibly have laid out the glass shards in the tunnel during the Butterfly trial and the implausibility of a poison that works in exactly 60 minutes.
23** And when the whole thing suddenly inverts on itself.
24--->'''"Ridley":''' Aw shit, you learned my one ace in the hole! Damn you, Sammy!\
25'''Diabetus:''' I wish Ridley would call Samus "Sammy".\
26'''slowbeef:''' He doesn't really talk, though. That's something ''we'' did!\
27'''Diabetus:''' ...oh no, I can't tell the two apart anymore!
28* Even after Omega Ridley, the voice, jokes and craziness continue to the end of the LP.
29-->''(slowbeef is in the Valhalla and wonders if the area is too dark for the stream viewers to see)''\
30'''Diabetus:''' The only thing that needs its brightness turned up '''is you!''' Wah-wah! ''(in Ridley voice)'' '''Trolled!'''\
31'''slowbeef:''' ''(bursts into laughter)'' If you did that to Ridley he'd just be like, "Aaaauugghhhh!"
32* From the Ridley X fight in Fusion:
33--> "Peekaboo! Now I look disgustin'! Canonically, I died two games ago!"
34** And later, when they talk about rewards for beating Ridley:
35--->'''Diabetus''': No, you just get an Energy Tank for [[ThatCameOutWrong beating him off]].\
36'''"Ridley"''': Uhhh... I don't quite remember ''that''. Is that canon? Let's just go back to the 'me falling forever' canon.
37* Ridley's Resort. An all-inclusive casino/hotel/resort, run by Ridley.
38--> "It's a vacation!"
39* Jokes about Ridley on television:
40** "Stay tuned for ''[[Series/ShitMyDadSays Shit Ridley Says]]''!"
41** Ridley's spinning fire breath and simultaneous energy tail, or as Ridley says, "This is from my Vegas show, Samus! Tell me whatcha think!" It segues into a discussion on magicians, and into ''Penn, Teller, & Ridley'':
42-->[[Series/PennAndTellerBullshit "Phazon corruption is bullshit!"]]
43** The above leads to the prospect of [[CrazyIsCool an all-magician news program]].
44-->"And now David Copperfield with the weather."
45** ''[[Series/AmericasNextTopModel America's Next Top Ridley]]''
46** ''[[Series/TheWalkingDead The Walking Ridley]]'':
47-->"Instead of zombies, when you get bit you turn into a Ridley."\
48"Oh no."\
49"WUUUUAAAAAHHHHHH!!"\
50"And everyone's doing that, and the whole world gets very annoyed."
51** ''Roomin' With Ridley''. One's a bounty hunter, the other's a space gargoyle!
52--> '''slowbeef''': Adam's the landlord. He says, "You didn't pay rent," and then locks you in a room for five hours to explain what rent is and how to pay it.
53* Ridley '''explodes''' at Amorbis in ''Echoes'', ranting about how the franchise plummets when he's not around.
54-->'''"Amorbis"''': It's a livin'!\
55'''"Ridley"''': You shut the fuck up, the three of you! My catchphrase in ''Echoes''? No way! You'll be hearin' from my lawyers, Flaahgra and Thardus Incorporated!
56* Even though Ridley is nowhere to be found in ''Metroid Prime 2'' multiplayer, he still manages to make himself heard:
57-->"Now take all the bounty, Samus! Listen, did you find that coin chest yet, 'cause seriously, it's really bothering me!"
58* Other guests have tried their hand at the Ridley voice, with amusing results. They include Vicas, [=ScurvyKip, Blister, RChimpCola=] and Cherrydoom. That last one is particularly entertaining, considering Cherrydoom later edited out her attempt and therefore never saw the light of day. slowbeef and Diabetus call her out on it.
59--> '''slowbeef''': Fuck you, Cherrydoom.
60* Although he takes his time to appear in ''Metroid: Other M'', he steals the scene anyway. Take his response to Anthony once again referring to Samus as a "lady".
61-->'''"Ridley"''': Even ''I'' think that's [[UnfortunateImplications sexist]], [[EvenEvilHasStandards and I'm a terrible gargoyle]]!
62* Ridley tends not to appear in non-Metroid [=LPs=] for obvious reasons, but his voice is recycled for the crow enemies in Bloodborne.
63[[/folder]]
64
65[[folder:Let's Plays]]
66!!VideoGame/MetroidPrime
67* Meta-example: slowbeef proudly proclaiming his intent to scan the hell out of everything at the beginning... and missing the only pirate lore on the frigate.
68** All of slowbeef's early scanning counts, especially his complaints about the enemy names being unoriginal.
69--->'''Diabetus''': Can you scan it?\
70'''slowbeef''': Hey, wait. Oh God, I ''can?''\
71'''Diabetus''': I knew it.\
72'''slowbeef''': 'Tangle Weed'. Shut up. Tangle weed, what the fuck is that?\
73'''Diabetus''': Whatever biologist explored Tallon IV is the least creative person I've ever seen.
74* The HurricaneOfPuns that ensues about halfway through the [[http://bd.baldurk.org/1486 boss fight with Thardus.]] It is absolutely '''''magma'''nificent''.
75* Slowbeef's hatred of the inexplicably tough bendezium.
76* The abrupt MoodWhiplash when slowbeef first enters the Crashed Frigate, a masterpiece of SceneryPorn and SugarWiki/AwesomeMusic, only to find an unexpected surprise waiting for him:
77-->'''slowbeef''': Oh, ''wow'', this is absolutely breathtaking--''[[DemonicSpiders flying pirates]] HERE?! '''UNDERWATER?!'''''
78* The aptly named "Trainwreck with Khad/Toffile." ''Especially'' when slowbeef blows his stack against Khad about halfway through the video.
79** In later videos during the same recording session, slowbeef encounters Chozo Ghosts and Khad turns on the ''Franchise/{{Ghostbusters}}'' theme, which screws with the audio recording. Slowbeef laughs the first time, though the humor wears off afterward.
80--->'''slowbeef:''' ''(echoing)'' Khad, it's going to loop our voices back into the microphone!
81* At one point, Samus' eye reflections render incorrectly, resulting in a brief glimpse of [[BlackEyesOfEvil completely black eyes]]. Slowbeef ends up getting freaked out by it.
82* Diabetus says "I'm gonna pee now, [[TemptingFate I hope the microphone doesn't pick it up]]." No points for guessing what happens five seconds later.
83* This particular line after talking about pancreatic cancer (ItMakesSenseInContext):
84-->'''slowbeef''': Who needs a fucking pancreas? Right, Diabetus? ...Oh.
85* Back at the start of the LP, the jokes about planet Tallon IV's unimaginative name.
86-->'''Diabetus:''' You got a name for this planet? Tall...on-- you already used that three times!\
87'''slowbeef:''' We didn't even differentiate, you named all of these Tallon, there's like 20 of them.\
88'''Diabetus:''' Oh well, put Roman numerals after them, whaddaya want?!\
89'''slowbeef:''' You always put Roman numerals on, they don't look cool!\
90'''Diabetus:''' [[ImADoctorNotAPlaceholder I'm a scientist, I'm not a creative, c'mon!]]
91** Then they wonder if they're subtitling the planets, leading to "Tallon II: The Revenge", "Tallon III: Film/ANewHope", "Tallon V: [[Film/LeprechaunBack2ThaHood Back 2 Da Hood]]" and "Tallon VI: Return of Tallon".
92--->'''Diabetus:''' I never asked to be head of nomenclature.\
93'''slowbeef:''' You are the coolest astronomer I know, you gotta get professional.
94
95!!VideoGame/MetroidPrime2Echoes
96* The episode-long [[http://bd.baldurk.org/1660#title Mac vs. PC debate between slowbeef and Proteus4994]].
97** A suspiciously apropos scan in the same video:
98--->'''slowbeef''': The problem with Khad is the minute he starts [=IMing=] you, it's like cancer or something where it doesn't really stop. But you just can't get rid of him then. And if you ignore him, it somehow just spurs him on even worse. Wait... "The Age of Anxiety".
99* Any time slowbeef attempts to pronounce Luminoth names.
100* Slowbeef's reaction to the Kinetic Orb Cannon:
101-->'''slowbeef''': What...WHAT?! Wait a-wait a minute, WHAT?!...WHAT? What, but why-but why w-...That's the-that's the stupidest fucking thing I've ever heard!\
102'''Vicas''': You never know when you're gonna need to shoot Kinetic Orbs around.
103* Slowbeef's encounter with [[GoddamnedBoss the Grapple Guardian]].
104--> '''slowbeef''': [[WhyWontYouDie This is going to be a long fight]] just because I'm stupid!
105** The Grapple Guardian disgusts him so much he spends the next two videos pissed off at everything. It's absolutely hilarious, especially when he gets to Chykka.
106* The first encounter with the Rezbit.
107* Diabetus and slowbeef doing multiplayer. [[http://bd.baldurk.org/1781#title All of it.]]
108** Everything from the 20:40 mark. "This is quality entertainment--solid gold standard."
109--->'''Diabetus''': This music is ''awful''.\
110'''slowbeef''': ''(laughing)'' It really is!\
111'''Both''': ''(nasal wail)'' Waaa, waa, waa waa waa waa waaaa metroid!\
112'''Diabetus''': Sounds like Nathan Lane singing about Metroid.
113** Then when Slowbeef and Diabetus duel with Light Beams:
114--->'''slowbeef:''' Hey look who's got a Light Beam now, huh?! ''WHO'S GOT A LIGHT BEAM NOW, HUH?!'' '''HUH?!''' '''YOU'RE NOTHIN'!! LOOK AT YOU!!'''\
115'''Diabetus:''' [[BigNo NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!]]\
116''(slowbeef gets killed)''\
117'''slowbeef:''' Wait, I died?
118* His reaction to finding the Screw Attack.
119
120!!VideoGame/MetroidPrime3Corruption
121* Samus takes an... alternate path to return to her ship when the GFS Olympus is attacked.
122-->'''slowbeef:''' "Air Lock Cycling". ...[[DoubleTake oh]]! [[ThrownOutTheAirLock Air lock?]]\
123'''Diabetus:''' [[CasualDangerDialogue Oh yeah,]] [[ThisIsGonnaSuck you're fucked.]]\
124''(Samus is blown out into space)''\
125'''slowbeef:''' Uhhh... ''why'' did we do that?
126** When Samus does find a convenient route back onboard, slowbeef rants incredulously about how she couldn't have possibly expected that to work.
127* The whole argument about Diabetus telling slowbeef that he's going the wrong way in episode 14.
128* Half of the entire LP consists of {{Take That}}s against ''Other M''. The funny parts are when they mock Sakamoto, though, which reaches its climax when slowbeef purposely mistranslates [[EasterEgg his developer's message]] in the beginning of Episode 13:
129-->'''Translation:''' Hello, this is Creator/YoshioSakamoto! It's not easy writing stories for Metroid... considering my functional illiteracy. Honestly, I don't really like Samus, and I don't want you to like her, either. I hate her and feel threatened by her. I will ruin this franchise. I'm just coming out and telling you. Fuck Metroid and fuck you.
130** There's also their impressions of Sakamoto whining about ''Metroid'''s story, in a baby voice.
131--->'''slowbeef:''' "Samus is a girl, therefore she cwies!"\
132'''Diabetus:''' "Samus wants authowization!"\
133'''slowbeef:''' "Men want to do her job!"\
134'''Diabetus:''' "Tha's what women do!"\
135'''slowbeef:''' "You can't go in the last area, you're a woman!"
136** "Samus is scared of Widley!" "Widley." "Widley."
137* Slowbeef and Diabetus quickly grow tired of the tendency for every boss in the game to have a ShockwaveStomp, culminating in Omega Ridley asking if his use of the move is original.
138* While Samus is infiltrating the Pirate Homeworld and a Phazite door slams down in front of her, Diabetus lampshades the poor excuse for backtracking.
139-->'''''SLAM!'''''\
140"FUCK YOU!"
141* The beginning of video five:
142-->'''slowbeef''': ''(After making LetsPlay/ChipCheezum's Mii)'' This would've been a lot funnier before I spent like, an hour with Diabetus having technical issues...\
143'''Diabetus''': Oh, me? It was just me?\
144''({{Beat}})''\
145'''slowbeef''': ...Whatever. Go to hell.\
146[...]\
147'''slowbeef''': ''(Heard untangling wires in the background)'' Now my fucking Wiimote's caught up in my VideoGame/GuitarHero drums... Or, whatever. Fuck it.\
148''(Chip laughs)''\
149'''slowbeef''': ''Damn it!'' ...Stupid... '''bullshit!!'''\
150'''Chip Cheezum''': Let's play the drums!
151
152!!VideoGame/SuperMetroid Justin Bailey Hack
153* The entire first video; slowbeef initially starts out unimpressed, but as he plays more, he goes into a state of shock over how horrifying it is that someone ''made'' this.
154
155!!VideoGame/DeadToRights [=/=] Dead To Rights: Retribution
156* The various nicknames given to Jack's disarm moves.
157-->'''slowbeef''': That one's called Twist and Shoot
158-->'''Diabetus''': That one was called physically impossible to actually do to somebody.
159* In the LP of the remake, they crack up during the 'bonding' father-son boxing match and then explore Jack's motivations. "Look Dad, I broke this guy's neck '''and''' electrocuted him to death! ''(disturbed gleeful cackle)'' See, I don't need therapy!"
160* The entirety of Fahook's plane.
161-->"I'M STUCK IN A CUTSCENE! WHHHHYYYYY?!"
162** [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9J45iyHkkbM This moment]] from the intro to Fahook's plane,
163* During the [[http://bd.baldurk.org/1074 drowning scene]] in which slowbeef has to repeatedly mash buttons to keep Jack from drowning:
164-->'''slowbeef:''' What really sucks is if you fuck this up, it's just game over, but also your hand is pretty tired from masturba--I mean, from hitting the buttons.
165* From the remake: "Oh boy, Tseng's coked up and he knows kung fu." What really sells it is the completely blasé way slowbeef says it.
166* Also from the remake, slowbeef and Diabetus make fun of a moment detailing the games ArtificialStupidity When Shadow runs straight past a guard who simply keeps on walking.
167-->'''Diabetus (as guard)''': Oh, hey. A dog. Alright.\
168'''Diabetus (as the guard watches Shadow tearing another guard apart)''': Tough day Steve?
169* In this one room in the last level of Retribution, the enemies stop firing at Jack Slate, and start trying to just run past him. Slowbeef and Diabetus theorize that they are on the hospital's gym.
170* slowbeef says at the start of the original LP that the game is actually pretty good. He desperately continues to push this claim throughout the LP even as he's constantly making fun of it and talking about how much it sucks.
171* Jack Slate's penchant for {{lame comeback}}s rarely goes unnoticed.
172-->'''Jack Slate''': Get outta here, this place is about the get deadly. And for God's sake, put some clothes on!\
173'''slowbeef''': Yeah, woman! And make me a sandwich!\
174'''Diabetus''': And then [[CallBack take it up with city hall!]]
175** The lamest BondOneLiner ever comes after a certain boss fight:
176-->''Diggs collapses in post-fight cutscene''\
177'''Jack Slate''': [''{{Beat}}''] Dumb son of a bitch. [''{{Beat}}, walks off'']
178* During the escort mission after Jack has arrested Julian Temple:
179-->'''slowbeef''': But keep in mind, martial law is in Grant City, right?\
180'''Diabetus''': Right.\
181'''slowbeef''': So, like, where are we bringing him?\
182'''Diabetus''': Um...\
183'''slowbeef''': Like, what are we going to do? Bring him to a police station, kill everyone in it and throw him in an empty jail cell?\
184'''Diabetus''': Well, that is what Jack ''would'' do, right?\
185'''slowbeef''': Yeah, I guess that is in character.
186** And the goons don't fail to gleefully point it out when Jack proceeds to do ''exactly that.''
187* After Jack runs into yet another scantily dressed woman:
188-->'''Diabetus''': Are there any women who wear like, a complete shirt that covers more than 50% of their body?\
189'''slowbeef''': Yeah. Oh, in ''this'' game? No, no...
190
191!!VisualNovel/{{Snatcher}} (Video LP)
192* The comments on how important words are always capitalized in conversations.
193-->'''slowbeef:''' Why? Are you looking for SNATCHERS?!?\
194'''Diabetus:''' ''(whispering)'' Keep your voice down. Of course I'm looking for ''(shouting)'' SNATCHERS!
195* After repeatedly handing over large sums of money to Napoleon in exchange for information, the duo spends the next 5 minutes commenting on Gillian's negotiation skills.
196-->'''slowbeef:''' Here are my car keys and my gun.\
197'''Diabetus:''' Take the Turbo Cruiser. Do you want Metal Gear?\
198''(after a few minutes, slowbeef tries giving Napoleon cash again, only for Metal Gear to comment that they don't need any more information)''\
199'''slowbeef:''' Oh look, Metal Gear stopped him.\
200'''Diabetus:''' Thank Metal Gear. Give Metal Gear all your cash.
201
202!!VideoGame/SDSnatcher
203* Most of this LP is in screenshot format, but slowbeef's reaction to one particular event [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TMie-gfz-6U warranted a video response]].
204-->'''slowbeef:''' I went through a ''goddamn'' mirror maze [[spoiler:to fight a robot in a panda suit]].
205
206!!VideoGame/Golgo13
207* This comment on the stealth bombers;
208-->'''dave_o:''' The pilots of this are really stupid. You know, it's like "There's some dude flying behind us, shooting the hell out of the plane." "Just keep flying straight, he'll go away."
209-->'''slowbeef:''' "Haha. Fuck him!"
210-->'''dave_o:''' "Forget about 'im. Look, he's wearing a motorcycle helmet. What could he do?"
211* [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c8F7cZ2px7g&t=330s In the first episode]], slowbeef gets caught [=LPing=] at work by his boss, who joins in the LP.
212
213!!VideoGame/TheRevengeOfShinobi (for the "Hard Games Thread")
214* His claiming to have a letter from Sega's lawyers when he comes across something in the game that is particularly lawyer-baiting and how said letters claim said thing is not what it appears to be ripping off (Except for ComicBook/SpiderMan and Franchise/{{Godzilla}})
215* His joking about how Joe Musashi might be an Italian ninja who got his weapons from Rocco Takahashi and UsefulNotes/HattoriHanzo (AKA The Gooch)
216
217!!VideoGame/CaveStory+ Hard Mode
218* Any time slowbeef compares Diabetus' stream to his.
219* Halfway through Session 8, slowbeef reaches the Outer Wall, and spends the next half-hour getting killed repeatedly by what he dubs 'ghost cats'. He eventually manages to get through by making a panicked run up the last section.
220* In Session 11, slowbeef, Diabetus, and Proteus start joking around about Retsupurae merchandise. At several points, slowbeef screws up the game because he's laughing too hard.
221* In session 12, slowbeef and co. start discussing how [=DarksydePhil=] would handle Cave Story.
222
223!!VideoGame/DarkSouls
224* Beef's prolonged struggle against Ornstein and Smough, culminating in the quintessential ''VideoGame/DarkSouls'' experience: "[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J-_tdMzXpbs Welcome to Dark Souls]]".
225* After struggling against Black Dragon Kalameet, he finally takes it down and gets the Calamity Ring. His reaction makes it worth it.
226-->'''slowbeef:''' Receive double damage? ''Receive?''... Fuck you, ''Dark Souls''.
227
228!!VideoGame/{{Psychonauts}}
229* His reaction to Emotional Baggage.
230-->'''slowbeef:''' My god, it's as if Diabetus wrote this whole fuckin' game.
231* The entire boss battle with The Phantom.
232
233!!VideoGame/{{Bloodborne}}
234* Early on slowbeef explores a dark house in the starting area of Yharnam. He dispatches most of the enemies and walks up to what looks like the wheelchair-bound NPC who helped him in the prologue... Only for the man to pull out an enormous blunderbuss and nearly blow him away with a single shot scaring the crap out of slowbeef. Diabetus immediately declared the wheelchair hunters to be his favorite enemy, slowbeef cracks up right after that commentary.
235* At one point slowbeef finds a boar in a sewer tunnel, runs down a hallway, and falls down a pit to his death... [[spoiler: and the boar falls down the same pit charging after him.]]
236* slowbeef figures out how to cheese "gatling guy," and while he's debating about whether to cheese him or try to kill him fair and square, [[spoiler:gatling guy walks off a ledge and falls to his death.]]
237* slowbeef finally gets close to killing Bloodstarved Beast, [[spoiler:then the capture card gets disconnected, preventing slowbeef from seeing anything. slowbeef and Diabetus figure that Bloodstarved Beast somehow broke the capture card as revenge for slowbeef killing gatling guy.]]
238* The next time slowbeef fights Bloodstarved Beast, he dies while the Beast's health bar was empty. To make things worse, beef had earlier joked about giving his daughter to Diabetus if he lost again.
239* In Episode 31, he discovers one of the perks of having over 40 Insight - being able to see the Amygdalas throughout Yharnam. The first ten minutes of the video consist almost entirely of the two of them gaping at the Amygdala outside Cathedral Ward.
240* In Episode 65, slowbeef's first run through the DLC starts off with his encounter with the giant, ax-wielding monster in the church, which appears to be too big to fit through the doorway. The second he tries to taunt it with the Make Contact gesture, it leaps out of the cathedral and sends him flying with its ax.
241* Their reaction to Ludwig the Accursed's second form in Episode 68.
242* In Episode 72, Ridley quite literally drops in. [[RunningGag and he continues dropping.]]
243--->''':Diabetus:''' '''My god, that was the best crow yet!'''
244** Later in the same episode, The Living Failures [[spoiler:get the last laugh. They may have died to him, but that doesn't stop their final attack from connecting '''post-mortem'''.]]
245* In Episode 77, he gets to the cutscene at the end of the DLC, only for the game to come back to his control with the message that one of his notes was rated fine. Toward the end of the video, he falls off a ledge and dies on an out-of-bounds floor below, only to receive ''another'' one of these messages right before the loading screen comes up.
246* slowbeef livestreams the final episode, and thus warns he'll have to deal with his Twitter notifications early on. This ends up being an amazing BrickJoke, as his notification, a drawing of Donald Trump with a voice clip of him shouting "I just raised the stakes" pops up at the ''exact second'' slowbeef [[https://youtu.be/gtm1CPEoQD0?t=14m46s lands the killing blow]] on the FinalBoss, which causes him to crack up laughing.
247* Upon their first sight of a [[TheGreys Celestial Envoy,]] which doesn't seem to be hostile:
248-->'''Diabetus:''' Is that the alien from ''WesternAnimation/AmericanDad''?
249-->'''slowbeef:''' Don't make me ''want'' to kill it!
250
251!![[VideoGame/PokemonRedAndBlue Pokemon Fire Red]] Nuzlocke Run
252* At one point Slowbeef brings Diabetus into the stream shouting "Diabetus, I choose you!" Diabetus responds by [[PokemonSpeak saying his name.]]
253* Slowbeef and Diabetus realize [[MagikarpPower how useless Magikarp is]] but fall in love immediately trying to shoehorn him into any situation they can think of.
254* Slowbeef's first encounter with Grimer. Both he and Diabetus lose it.
255
256!!Sartak's Series/{{Jeopardy}} mod with Diabetus and dave_o
257* "Why does Alex Trebek look like someone tapped him on the scrotum every time you pick a question?"
258* As slowbeef complains about not having played most of the games in the categories:
259-->'''dave_o''': Slowbeef, I don't think there are many categories about obscure Creator/HideoKojima games that you have to translate on your own.
260* From the ''VideoGame/ParasiteEve'' category:
261-->'''Answer''': The final battle ensues with this offspring of the title character.\
262'''dave_o''': The answer... is Eve.\
263'''Sartak''': No.\
264'''Diabetus''': What is ''Parasite'' Eve?
265** Additionally, slowbeef's reaction to dave_o correctly guessing "the Chrysler Building" out of nowhere, as well as Diabetus's future responses defaulting to the same guess.
266* A couple of gems from the ''VideoGame/{{Fallout 2}}'':
267** First of all:
268--->'''Answer''': This device can turn the barren wasteland into lush, verdant landscape.\
269'''Diabetus''': What is Bob Ross?
270** From the end of the category:
271--->'''dave_o''': [[WhoWritesThisCrap Who wrote this question?]]\
272'''Sartak''': Dancing With Ferrets.\
273'''dave_o''': What is ''his'' answer?\
274'''Sartak''': "The Enclave".\
275'''dave_o''': What a queer. You hear that, Dancing With Ferrets?\
276''(slowbeef explodes into laughter)''\
277'''dave_o''': You're so queer you're killing slowbeef with laughter.\
278'''slowbeef''': I'm a little dizzy from that.
279* From the ''VideoGame/FinalFantasyIX'' category:
280-->'''Answer''': The skill you must learn to be able to use Zidane's ultimate attack.\
281'''dave_o''': I think the answer is autism.
282* After the winner ([[spoiler:it's slowbeef]]) is declared, one of the parting quips ([[spoiler:from dave_o]]):
283-->"Congratulations, you are the least likely to have sex."
284* In their bonus round when they play a normal game of ''Jeopardy!'':
285-->'''Answer''': They're able to stand on end due to small erector muscles.\
286'''slowbeef''': It's hair! Wait is that right?\
287'''dave_o''': I don't know. You'd know all about small erector muscles.
288* Their reaction to the "Turtles" category. Also, from one of the clues:
289-->'''Answer''': Creator/DrSeuss said this fictional turtle he created was a caricature of Adolf Hitler.\
290'''Diabetus''': Dr. Seuss was a badass!
291[[/folder]]
292
293[[folder:Livestreams]]
294!!Undercover Cops
295* Pretty much [[RunningGag involving]] Gunpuncher.
296** "Hail Gunpuncher!"
297** "Let's take a moment of silence to remember Gunpuncher."
298
299!!VideoGame/TheBindingOfIsaac Rebirth
300* [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DhE6qS6SG4s The Lost (Boss Rush/The Lamb)]]
301** After about an hour, he finally puts together an absurdly broken build that lets him win by ''standing still''.
302
303!!VideoGame/MetalGear2SolidSnake
304* The very first thing slowbeef does after beating Running Man? He talks to a kid who hates men with guns. So 'beef [[VideoGameCrueltyPotential shoots her]]. [[spoiler:But in this game, shooting kids drains your health, which results in the post-boss fight 'beef [[VideoGameCrueltyPunishment immediately dying]].]]
305
306!!VideoGame/{{EarthBound|1994}}
307* Beef's (and the chat's) constant annoyance at Jeff. It gets to the point where they either act like he doesn't exist or they keep messing up his name.
308** One of his most recent streams is even titled "Only Two Party Members?" furthering the RunningGag of Jeff being non-existent.
309** The sheer number of misnaming the chat gives to Jeff. It gets to the point where they can't come up with male "J" names and resort to female "J" names and even random objects that start with "J".
310--> '''Chelseaadamsq:''' Ah, the gang's all here. Ness, Paula....[[Franchise/{{Pokemon}} Bulbasaur?]]
311
312!!VideoGame/{{Klax}}
313* [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=veZ5bjPlF8M Relaxin and Klaxin]]: Slowbeef attempts to show Diabetus Klax (an Atari arcade game from the 80s that was ported to the UsefulNotes/TurboGrafx16). About 5 minutes in, slowbeef's wife, [=ShiddyKat=], shows up. Hilarity ensues.
314** Because Slowbeef is wearing headphones, Shiddy can't hear anything that Diabetus says, so Slowbeef is constantly saying things to Diabetus that she reacts to, and sometimes vice versa.
315** At one point Shiddy says that she saw a play by Creator/JamesJoyce starring Creator/ChristopherWalken. Slowbeef and Diabetus don't believe that such a thing exists, so she attempts to look it up using Siri, which leads to the revelation that she addresses her phone each time with "Hey, listen."[[spoiler:She turns out to be right.]]
316
317!!1-on-1 Single Basketball
318* [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KWTb85JIxXQ 1-on-1 Basketball: Best Basketball Fighting Game]]: While the entire game is hilarious, slowbeef utterly loses it when he realizes that letting someone tackle him to the ground is a viable strategy, since it allows Furin to always make an accurate 3 point shot until she falls, at least until it starts to fail with Shota and Laheesha.
319* While up against Kirin, slowbeef is losing 8-2, but feels he's finally got Kirin down. He prepares to shoot the ball, then stops, as Kirin took the bait and approached Furin, allowing slowbeef to easily manuever around him, until...
320--> '''Announcer:''' [[UnexpectedlyRealisticGameplay DOUBLE DRIBBLE.]]
321--> '''slowbeef:''' [[BigWhat WHAT]] ARE YOU SERIOUS!? There's a [[MyRulesAreNotYourRules guy who]] ''[[MyRulesAreNotYourRules flies]]'' in this [[PrecisionFStrike fucking]] game!
322* While he quickly grows used to the violence in the game (despite being Basketball, it is totally legal to beat up your opponent to get the ball) slowbeef cracks up each time Furin does a special move on the opponents, such as elbowing Ron in the face, doing a headbutt and spinning-back kick to Laheesha, [[WouldHurtAChild doing the same kick on Shota,]] and ''headbutting'' King.
323* The last match. [[MakesJustAsMuchSenseInContext The court is in the middle of clouds surrounded by floating statues of basketball players and two thrones]] ''[[MakesJustAsMuchSenseInContext made of basketballs.]]'' It gets even better when slowbeef sees his opponent, King, and asks 'are we playing with God?'
324** The chat also quickly comes to the conclusion, based on his hammy voice clips, actions, and design, that King is obviously based on [[Manga/JoJosBizarreAdventure DIO Brando]].
325
326!!VideoGame/BlazingStar
327* Slowbeef's hysterical laughter at the FinalBoss: [[spoiler: a giant cyborg baby with a sniper rifle.]]
328
329!!VideoGame/ResidentEvil2Remake
330* After finding a tourist guide at the beginning which features only ''two'' places to visit, the police station and the orphanage, they start joking throughout that those really are the only things to see in Racoon City (especially since, while the police station at least used to be an art museum and has some nice architecture and a statue in the lobby, why would a tourist decide to take a visit to see an orphanage?), to the point that Racoon City is apparently made up almost entirely of cops and orphans, with the orphans becoming cops when they grow up.
331* In part 2, Beef, Sara, and Cass discover that the lever in the jail opens a side passage to help avoid the recently released zombie prisoners. As soon as they enter it, [[YankTheDogsChain Tyrant starts walking towards them]], much to their dismay (and Leon's). However, as soon as Tyrant tries to punch him, Beef manages to dodge. Cue Tyrant [[EpicFail completely missing two massive punches]].
332-->'''Cass:''' Ohhh, missed, bitch!\
333'''Sara:''' Too slow!\
334'''Slowbeef:''' [[GenreSavvy Please don't]] [[DoNotTauntCthulhu taunt him]].\
335'''Cass:''' You'll never kill us, ever! \
336''Cue three zombies wandering around the corner, only for Slowbeef to dodge all three of them''\
337'''Cass:''' Leon was on the goddamn football team!\
338'''Sara:''' [[TemptingFate Ain't no one touching this guy]]\
339''Cue cutscene where Tyrant bursts through a wall and [[NeckLift neck lifts]] Leon''
340* During his second encounter with [[spoiler: Birkin]], Slowbeef hits the button to move the shipping container without knowing what it did, beyond give him more room. He hits the other button, tries to run from [[spoiler:Birkin]], gets caught, and then [[spoiler: both of them get hit by the container]]. This happens twice in a row. On the third attempt, [[spoiler: the cutscene only shows Leon getting hit]]. Slowbeef finds them to be [[ActuallyPrettyFunny hilarious]].
341
342!!VideoGame/Yakuza0
343* When Diabetus comes on for Episode 22, him and slowbeef wastes no time in pointing that they have not been putting out any Retsupurae related content for [[ScheduleSlip quite some time]]:
344-->'''slowbeef:''' With me is my good friend, Diabetus.\
345'''Diabetus:''' ...Who are you again?\
346'''slowbeef:''' I'm some guy. We haven't talked in, like, years. Anyway, how did rehab go--? Nah, I'm joking!\
347''(both laugh)''\
348'''slowbeef:''' What if I really came in with some horrible story like: "I'm glad you got your legs back, after the combat..."\
349'''Diabetus:''' So, I'm back from the death of my entire family...\
350'''slowbeef:''' ''(laughs)'' Congratulations on being found "not guilty" on that.\
351'''Diabetus:''' Thank you, thank you.
352[[/folder]]
353
354[[folder:Wifestreams]]
355!!VideoGame/HeavyRain
356* Not long after the playthrough began, their [=PS3=] controller died, leaving them with [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g9bFb3kpKeM two minutes of Ethan staring lovingly at an orange juice carton]] and slowbeef absolutely losing his shit.
357* Later on, when Norman starts listing off what attributes the killer has (as determined from profiling, his job as an FBI profiler), Shiddykat comes to the conclusion the Origami Killer sounds like slowbeef.
358* A RunningGag soon comes to be; Shiddykat, despite proving to be good at action scenes where a stream of buttons are thrown at her, has a hard time dealing with fridges.
359[[/folder]]
360
361[[folder:Others]]
362* VideoGame/ResidentEvil5 Multiplayer with Diabetus (and Cherrydoom at the end)
363** There's the RunningGag of wanting to find and pick up eggs so that the other player can request them.
364** [=RE5=] - Wesker/Chris Facility
365-->'''Diabetus''': Well you know, Chris and Wesker aren't really on the best of terms.
366-->'''slowbeef''': That's the thing, you know, they don't really like each other. I think it had to do with, like Twitter.
367-->'''Diabetus''': Yeah, I think it was some kind of [=YouTube=] drama.
368** Wesker/Chris in the Facility - Take Two
369-->''During a tense moment...''
370-->'''slowbeef''': Fuck ''me''!
371-->'''Diabetus''': After we're done!
372-->'''slowbeef''': ''(chuckles)'' Don't tell the Internet!
373** [=RE5=] - Jill/Sheva in the Ancient Ruins
374-->'''slowbeef''': This guy tried to impale me and he completely missed. I'm talking about his spear. I'm talking about his wooden spear. I'm talking about his wooden spear without any sort of innuendo whatsoever.
375-->'''Diabetus''': Look, dicks, okay?
376-->'''slowbeef''': Read my fanfiction, that's what I'm getting at!
377-->'''Diabetus''': Please! It's all I have.
378-->'''slowbeef''': "Jill and Shee--Sheva were caught in the ruins." I got yelled at for calling her "Sheeva" the other day.
379-->'''Diabetus''': What, like at work?
380-->'''slowbeef''': ''(chuckles)'' Yes, at work. My boss was really upset with me.
381-->...
382-->'''slowbeef''': I have, like eight guys on my ass.
383-->'''Diabetus''': There's like a fan club following you!
384-->'''slowbeef''': Yeah, I noticed! Ohh good God!
385-->'''Diabetus''': ''(in "old-timey newsroom" voice)'' "Jill! Jill, we love your work! Jill!"
386-->'''slowbeef''': ''(also assuming the voice)'' "Jill! Jill Valentine!"
387-->'''Diabetus''': "Jill, can we please have a word?"
388-->'''slowbeef''': "''VideoGame/{{Resident Evil 3|Nemesis}}'' was the greatest, rahhh! We're a tribe in Africa but this is how we talk, rahhh!"
389-->'''Diabetus''': 1920s Africa.
390** [=RE5=] - And Now Something for the Ladies
391--->'''Diabetus''': Yeah, I'm doing just great over here.\
392'''slowbeef''': Um... keep in mind that visual jokes don't really work on my end.\
393'''Diabetus''': No, trust me, I'm doing ''great''!\
394''(slowbeef's screen shows Wesker (Diabetus) getting floored by an Executioner's hammer)''\
395'''slowbeef''': Ooh, ahh... all right.
396* The ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OPImNEOYgXg Justin Bailey Special]]'', an old video where slowbeef shows Diabetus a very... ''[[VideoGamePerversityPotential special]]'' [[GameMod ROM hack]] of ''VideoGame/MetroidIIReturnOfSamus''. He claims [[NotMakingThisUpDisclaimer that he didn't photoshop this, and that it's completely real]] before revealing the title:
397-->METROID II:\
398[[spoiler:SAMUS BARES ALL]]
399** They react about as well as you'd expect, and it gets even ''more'' hilarious when [[OffModel Samus's sprite]] shows up.
400--->'''Diabetus:''' Is that Samus, or [[Literature/TheLordOfTheRings an Orc?]]\
401'''slowbeef:''' It's like she's punching herself in the face! [...] It's like an anchovy with legs!
402** The joke about P3:Industry (the author of the ROM hack) also makes them wonder if there's a P1 or P2:Industry.
403--->'''Diabetus:''' In case you weren't enticed by my ROM hack, let me show you my ''gallery...''
404** slowbeef's claim of "I think we can emphatically state we are not doing the rest of this game. At least not tonight."
405* In the Website/SomethingAwful Let's Race thread video, Slowbeef is racing scarboy and LetsPlay/ProtonJon in world 1 of ''VideoGame/SuperMarioBros3''. After having a decent lead over the other 2 racers up to the final stage (an auto-scrolling stage which should have guaranteed him victory) slowbeef ends up coming in last place when he forgets to press A at the pre-level cutscene. [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nG_S_rqLMtg Watch it here]].
406* For one of his Patreon goals, slowbeef plays Chou Aniki and Sakura Spirit at the same time. [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FlwIWQSuwrE The result is...very strange]].
407** The ''incredibly boring'' Sakura Spirit contrasts sharply with the bizarre Chou Aniki gameplay.
408-->'''Pullahoko:''' It's like you have one guy in the room trying to tell you a story, and there's another guy in the room just flailing and shitting his pants.
409-->'''slowbeef:''' The text on the right does sort of match what's on the left...''*a series of muscular men in revealing clothing fly by on the left*''...oh, it's Galactus, with sandals. ''*Pullahoko loses it*''
410** The third boss of Chou Aniki is a frog-snail that attacks by scaling its mouth and shooting red blocks at the player. It proves to be a ridiculously hard boss fight.
411-->'''Pullahoko:''' I don't even know what's happening ''in the context of the game!!'' It's like, "Here, here's a picture of a frog-snail, just make it fuck up and do...something."
412* A gem from Slowbeef's old strategy guide for ''VideoGame/MetalGear2SolidSnake'', upon finding a ration that contains ''chocolate.''
413-->'''slowbeef:''' Chocolate? In a combat ration? What kind of spoiled fucking crybabies are in this army? "Whaaa! I want ice cweam in my wations! And bwack tar hewowin." ([[ElmuhFuddSyndwome It's really cute the way they say 'hewowin'.]])
414** In fact, everything about the frankly baffling choice of foods in Zanzibar Land's combat rations:
415-->'''slowbeef:''' Ham, cheese, spaghetti, and coffee! What schizophrenic cooks are devising this shit? Do I really need to comment on this? I hope the B4 rations aren't popcorn, chickpeas, and grape jelly.
416* slowbeef streams ''Demon's Souls''... [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bxd2QKdLjLI while acting like DarksydePhil]]. It has to be seen to be believed.
417** Then there's his [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YlegTHQkmlA ''DarkSide Beef - MAJOR CHANGES TO THE CHANNEL!'']] video... which is two hours of Slowbeef doing a bravura performance as DSP, with all of the classic DSP mannerisms. Highlights include bitching about the amount his subscribers are tipping him, whining about having to pay off his four mortgages and three boats on his streamers salary, and claiming to have invented the airplane[[note]]A reference to DSP claiming to have invented the concept of Lets Play's[[/note]], all while clearing his nose about 100,000 times. The random noises slowbeef's baby does every once in a while only adds more to the hilarity of the thing.
418* [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LFYLx8l1fBE If Alien: Isolation won't run on your PC]], starring [[spoiler:his daughter as the Xenomorph]].
419* Slowbeef is playing the ''World's Scariest Police Chases'' game, imitating the overdramatic narrator from the show who always end the chases with bad puns. Then [[https://youtu.be/NWE58rNJZoY?t=3m50s this]] [[GoodBadBugs happens on his first chase]], causing him to start {{Corpsing}}.
420* The ''[[VideoGame/SonicTheHedgeHog2006 Sonic '06]]'' race of 2017; At [=MAGFest=] that year, Slowbeef and his buddy [=TieTuesday=] had challenged each other to a race of Sonic's Story in the famously terrible and broken ''Sonic'' game. While Slowbeef's practices focused mostly remembering how the game worked, Tie decided to learn speedrun tricks for the game. He became so good and had so much fun pulling them off, that he wound up seriously speedrunning the game, and was at one point ranked ''14th in the world'' for the Sonic's Story record (He is [[https://www.speedrun.com/sonic06 now ranked 25th]]). When the two finally raced each other live nine months later, Tie wound up [[CurbStompBattle trouncing Slowbeef]] in a very wacky and funny [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s4UFykH-2tw livestream]].
421** The stream lasted 2 hours. Tie beat the game in 45 minutes (as they challenged each other level by level, not for the entire game with boss fights), and for most of that time, Slowbeef was stuck on a snowboarding section of the third level for almost the entire time (a section that Tie completed in ''one minute''). Tie eventually started his own speedrun of Sonic's story with bosses while waiting for Slowbeef to finish, and even though he had a big time loss on the early stages (partly to show the stream some additional gltiches), he ''lapped'' Slowbeef in Crisis City, the fourth stage.
422** On the first loop of the first level, Tie describes and executes an impressive clip that launches him halfway across the map. Slowbeef's response?
423-->'''slowbeef:''' ...I'm running on loops...What? That's my strategy!
424** After Tie and Slowbeef are taken out by the same glitch on that same level, Tie observes that he regularly encounters glitches like that, and that even after having made ''110 playthroughs'' of the game, something new had happened during one of his runs earlier that day. Shortly after, Slowbeef told his viewers that he did not plan win, nor did he ever expect to, knowing what Tie had done to prepare:
425-->'''slowbeef:''' I'm not going to win this. For anyone who's kind of hoping 'Hey, wait! Maybe the glitches will be aligned, just in my favor'? Yeah, that's not going to happen.
426** As Tie coasts through the game, Slowbeef regularly interjects about the horrible time he's having with the game's controls and mechanics as he plays it "normally."
427-->'''slowbeef:''' I feel like every time I make it up a flight of stairs and nothing bad happens, that's my clutch moment.
428** Later in the game, Tie shows off some of the wacky ways that speedrunners use ''Sonic '06'''s extreme glitchiness to their advantage, from doors that are extremely easy to clip through, to "glitch speeds" that cause the projectiles in the mach-speed section of the Crisis City level to become nearly impossible to predict.
429[[/folder]]

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