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1WebVideo/{{Retsupurae}}'s very own LetsPlay/{{slowbeef}} and LetsPlay/{{Diabetus}} has accumulated so many funny moments that it even broke the page that was meant exclusively for their account. This page contains the original Retsupuraes: where people watch and jest at a Let's Play.
2
3'''[[Funny/{{Retsupurae}} Go Back]]'''
4----
5!!Examples (in alphabetical order):
6
7[[foldercontrol]]
8
9[[folder:Retsupuraes A-K]]
10* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D8d1zkUusqY 007's shyer, nerdier brother plays Battletoads]]'' is fairly dull for most of the video until the end.
11-->'''[=MrNelson007=]:''' I'd like to give a great big thanks to the developers of ''Battletoads'' for being such magnificently large bastards...\
12'''slowbeef:''' ''[laughing] Such magnificently large bastards?!'' What, are they all fat?\
13'''Diabetus:''' I think you need to ante up your put-downs there a little bit, guy.\
14'''slowbeef:''' "I'd like to thank Rare Software for being so full of dirty people. Way to be Mexican, guys, Jesus."
15%% Don't list "Adults React To [=PewDiePie=]" here; that goes under the 'Other' tab.
16* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2yEs7JK1ahA ADD LP]]'', a guy doing a 'quick update' while he plays ''Minecraft'' and constantly gets distracted.
17** In case you think that's hyperbole, the video is five minutes long and ends mid-sentence.
18* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4YTaWnOAdxA Amagon: A Great Choice for Your Child's First LP]]'': [=retroNES2600=] says "damn" and then apologizes for his language, despite saying the more harsh "fuck" and "shit" before and after this apology. The duo have fun with this throughout the rest of the video.
19* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-lTnbgHeZDw Amnesia: The Dork's Descent]]'' is based off a fairly popular video of someone playing Amnesia and [[NightmareFuel freaking out a lot]].
20-->'''slowbeef:''' I never played it, it's supposed to be scary?\
21'''Diabetus:''' It really gets scary when you have wimpy British people talking over it.\
22...\
23''[A white fade appears on the screen]''\
24'''slowbeef''': So, wait. Was that editing or did the game transition?\
25'''Diabetus:''' I think the game is attempting to uninstall itself while these people are playing it.\
26...\
27'''Diabetus:''' So ''this'' is [[LetsPlay/ElectricalBeast Bowser's evil test]].\
28...\
29'''slowbeef:''' Do you think a Care Bear is doing this Let's Play?\
30'''Diabetus:''' A Care Bear would be more manly than this.
31** The intro sets the tone for the rest of the RP.
32-->'''Jenomorph''': Here we go! ''OHHH FUCK!!''\
33'''Diabetus''': And there goes the atmosphere of the game altogether.
34** Their completely underwhelmed reaction to the [[BodyHorror monster]] while the player is screaming like a little girl.
35-->'''slowbeef:''' Alright, I-I'm sorry, that... '''Nothing''' is that scary.
36** At 5:41, Diabetus drops this gem:
37-->'''Diabetus:''' [[Franchise/ScoobyDoo Shaggy]] would be like [[EveryoneHasStandards "Man up, you little fuck".]]
38* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xA3plNb0EbY Art of Camcording]]'' takes camcorder [=LPs=] to a whole new level. Think aiming a camcorder at the TV with barely-audible commentary is bad? How cute. Try a camcorder aimed at a CRT television that's playing ''a VHS recording of the gameplay'' with barely-audible post-commentary! It has to be seen to be believed.
39--> ''Bonus weed whacker audio included''
40* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ANeEDOQY9rY Asura's, Like, Wrath IS THE MOST AWESOME THING LET'S DO THIS]]'' we get pre-[[LetsPlay/TheCreatures Creatures]] [=ImmortalHD=]'s incredibly excited playthrough of ''VideoGame/AsurasWrath''.
41-->'''[=ImmortalHD=]:''' Holy shit, look at this guy, he's like in space.\
42''[laughter]''\
43'''Ironicus:''' He's ''like'' in space. You could say it's ''as if'' he's in space.\
44'''slowbeef''': Not quite.\
45'''[=ImmortalHD=]''': Like, this physically doesn't make any sense.\
46'''[=ChipCheezum=]''': ''[in a {{Joisey}} accent]'' Yo, my anime game don't make any sense. I don't get this. They never established space.\
47'''slowbeef''': He doesn't care, though.\
48[...]\
49''[character from the game dives off the ship and flies toward earth]''\
50'''[=ImmortalHD=]:''' Whoa, what the fuck? '''What the fuck!?'''\
51'''[=ChipCheezum=]:''' Oh my god, do not show this man the [[Film/SupermanTheMovie first Superman movie!]]\
52'''Ironicus:''' Can there be a series where this guy just watches ''[[Anime/DragonBallZ DBZ]]'' 'cause I would subscribe to the man.\
53'''slowbeef''': ''[imitating [=ImmortalHD=]]'' "I'm amazed by fucking ''anything!''"\
54'''[=ChipCheezum=]:''' "Wait a second, there's a power level even further beyond!? '''''WHAT!?'''''"
55* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a658KWAmHd4 Automatic 100 HP Penalty for Finishing This Video]]''. The gang watches a LetsPlay of ''VideoGame/FireEmblemAwakening'' where the [=LPer=] voices and adlibs dialog for everybody. ''Including the horse.''
56-->'''slowbeef:''' Look at all the potential characters he could- look, there's "Bridgey", up top; he could voice ''him'' if he wanted. ''[in falsetto]'' "Hey, wanna cross ''me'' later?"\
57'''Diabetus:''' ''[also in falsetto]'' "Hey, I'm a Blue Square!"\
58'''slowbeef:''' ''[normal voice]'' "Hey, I'm your friend Green Square! Don't forget about me!" ''[slightly higher-pitched]'' "I'm your friend, Dislike Button! Please hit me a lot!"\
59'''Diabetus:''' ''[in gruff voice]'' "I'm the Red Square, motherfucker!" ''[{{beat}}]'' "Hi, I'm the Player Phase!"
60** He adlibs dialog for everyone during the battle, portraying the bandits as racists and having everyone curse liberally. It continues to go downhill from there.
61-->'''Bandit:''' "Here, sheepy sheepy! Come to the slaughter!"\
62'''Frederick:''' "[[LameComeback I think YOU should come to the slaughter, you fucking asshole!]]"\
63'''slowbeef:''' That was-''that'' was your comeback, ''really''?\
64'''Diabetus:''' Well, that was dialogue removed from the final product.\
65'''slowbeef:''' ''[mocking the [=LPer=]]'' No you! Uh... motherfucker?\
66'''Diabetus:''' ''[in gruff voice]'' Sticks and stones... may break my motherfucking bones, motherfucker.\
67'''slowbeef:''' ''[gruff]'' "This Let's Play is really realy-" ''[in surfer-esque voice the [=LPer=] keeps using]'' "No, ''you're'' annoying, shitdick!"\
68'''Diabetus:''' ''[gruff]'' "I am rubber, and ''you're a dildo!'' ...strike!"\
69'''slowbeef:''' ''All'' the enemies have throat problems, apparently.
70** Also, their reaction to when the [=LPer=] does breaks character(s).
71-->'''[=LPer=]:''' Oh shit, I got a new lance.\
72'''slowbeef:''' Oh, who was that character?\
73'''Diabetus:''' Oh, that was the first thing he said as himself I think. In this entire update.\
74'''slowbeef:''' That's his sub-conscious fighting to the surface.
75* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KkCnpWQxwyc Basic Problem Solving with Tinkidink and The Lime Popsicle]]''. slowbeef and LetsPlay/ChipCheezum take on the eponymous [=LPers=], as they in turn take on Stage 1 of ''WesternAnimation/TheIncredibleCrashDummies'' NES game for ''23 minutes.'' And little wonder, too; they play so badly that slowbeef starts giving them genuinely useful playing advice despite having ''never played the game before.''
76** The video title, in particular, comes from the [=LPers=]' collective inability to figure out basic gameplay mechanics. For example, Slick's primary weapon briefly stuns enemies, allowing him to walk through them until they recover. Neither [=LPer=] gets this until ''the end of the video.'' slowbeef says early on that even his non-gaming wife got annoyed by how long it took the [=LPers=] to get past ''the first enemy.''
77** The kicker is that the video is 23 minutes long ''with editing.'' The duo finds themselves wondering just what the [=LPers=] thought needed to be cut compared to the rest of the video!
78* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FBXI1ZwDx3g Best Terraria Let's Play I've Ever Seen!]]'': The after-LP commentary is longer than the LP itself. That's because the LP is ''one second long.''
79** In the spirit of the video, all of the comments are [[JustForFun/CandleJack Candle Jack]] jokes.
80* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AzoKcdDg5rQ BillyMC's Christmas Adventure]]'': The previous LetsPlay/BillyMC videos have been full of jokes about his abusive parents who are forcing him to LP ''The Lost Levels'', which makes it all the more hysterical when Billy himself mentions getting a phone call from his mother, asking him if he wants anything from [=McDonald's=] while she's doing her Christmas shopping. Take your pick for which is funnier: the final take where the guys pick up the implication that he gets [=McDonald's=] food as Christmas presents and run with it, or the first take included after the video, where they just collapse into laughter.
81* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UVYqDggRG2I Bioshock]]'': slowbeef and Diabetus freak out at the [=LPer's=] creepiness:
82-->'''Diabetus:''' Is this the "pre-bank robbery" video?\
83'''slowbeef:''' "If you don't subscribe to me, [[Film/TheDarkKnight I will blow up a hospital!]]"\
84'''Diabetus:''' Seriously, he has a ''gas mask'' in the background, look!\
85'''slowbeef:''' Holy shit! He's like the Unabomber Jr.!\
86''[The Bioshock theme suddenly starts playing]''\
87'''slowbeef:''' What the! Where did this violin music come from? We didn't add that!\
88'''Diabetus:''' Maybe he's playing it with the arm he has extended out there.\
89'''slowbeef:''' Maybe he's got a naked woman held by the throat in his outstretched hand.\
90'''Diabetus:''' Forcing her to play the violin.\
91'''slowbeef:''' Look at his ''eyes!'' God, he's ''scaring me!''\
92...\
93'''thezenbrothers:''' Oh yeah, one complaint again: ''[looks down]'' [[FirstPersonGhost NO FRIGGIN' FEET!]]\
94'''slowbeef:''' Whoa! All right, calm down!\
95'''Diabetus:''' Sounds like this guy has a fetish.\
96'''thezenbrothers:''' Uhhhh. I hate that for some reason.\
97'''slowbeef:''' [[SarcasmMode Yeah, that never happens in first person shooters.]]\
98...\
99''[We enter the infamous [[http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_Bk08k-CuuO0/SamEVwJ35-I/AAAAAAAAC2c/MyhpkMjgb5I/S660/931329_20070820_screen001.jpg lighthouse foyer]]]''\
100'''slowbeef:''' "'No Gods, Kings or Feet' We forgot to put it in the banner!"\
101'''Diabetus:''' "Which is why I hate this game!"\
102'''slowbeef:''' Ryan's statue is glaring at him, like "Don't make this video, you asshole!"
103* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3EdXHMgeoVs B-mer-mine]]'' The editing in the video makes it almost unwatchable.
104--> '''slowbeef:''' Is he editing out like, every other second for some reason?\
105'''Diabetus:''' We're seeing his actual attention span right now.
106* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ayeMqizulX0 Bowser's Evil Test]]''
107-->'''LetsPlay/ElectricalBeast:''' But there's sumfink I haven't told you about yet!\
108'''slowbeef:''' Uh-oh, what is it?\
109'''[=ElectricalBeast=]:''' Mario now has the power to turn back time! But only once! Because when he saved the time in the Tick Tock Clock...\
110'''slowbeef:''' Um, I was just kidding about the fanfiction thing, is he really doing that?\
111'''[=ElectricalBeast=]:''' ...he became the Hero of Time, and the Time Gods paid Mario a visit, but I couldn't get that bit on camera because the Time God's so powerful...\
112'''slowbeef:''' What the hell are you talking about, you nut?! ...maybe he was playing VideoGame/ChronoTrigger and doesn't realize when one game ends and the other begins?\
113'''Diabetus:''' Nah, I think he's just crazy.\
114'''slowbeef:''' Can't it be both?
115** After the video ends, slowbeef makes a troubling discovery.
116--> '''slowbeef''': He's got us by the balls, we have to watch the next episode to find out what the fuck he's talking about.\
117'''Diabetus''': The sad thing is, this is the last episode that he uploaded.\
118'''slowbeef''': ''Are you kidding?''\
119'''Diabetus''': There is nothing after this.\
120'''slowbeef''': The saga of [=ElectricalBeast=] ends on a fucking cliffhanger!?\
121'''Diabetus''': Yes, it ended on April 15, 2008.\
122''[long pause]''\
123'''slowbeef''': God. Uh, I never expected that.
124* In ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cvs5d50Rwsc#t=482s Braid - The Love Connection]]'', the guys discuss what they would do if they could go back in time:
125-->'''Dave_o:''' If I could go back in time, I would be slowbeef.\
126'''slowbeef:''' Aww.\
127'''Diabetus:''' Aww, no you wouldn't.\
128'''Dave_o:''' But... I don't know if I'd want to live through the 70s. Ohhh. You're old.
129* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mHz9dyfYLRQ Bro-Op LP]]'' starring LetsPlay/{{BillyMC}}, featuring The Lime Popsicle's ''interest'' in Creator/KatDennings, HoYay-laden teamwork, and Lime saying that everybody who's ever played the game with him has tried to kill him.
130--> '''slowbeef:''' It's stunning that there's already just [=BillyMC=] but now the fact that there's two, it's astronomically impossible!\
131'''Diabetus:''' I didn't know Billy could undergo mitosis.\
132'''slowbeef:''' He's spreading like Agent Smith from The Matrix. "And me!" "And me!" "And me!"\
133'''Diabetus:''' "Me too?"\
134'''slowbeef:''' "Me too!" "Oh boy, now we can play four-player games!"
135* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fb6S41DhG64 A Brutal Mario Let's Play]]''
136-->'''fireboy116:''' (lethargically) ''Jump.'' Jump.\
137* they both crack up*\
138'''slowbeef:''' Jesus Christ... "Record, record. Talk, talk."\
139'''Diabetus:''' I like how he made his controller settings for the hard of hearing.
140* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eKWhf8IUric Call it]]''
141-->'''slowbeef:''' Why does he have to-don't make us watch the tutorial.\
142'''Diabetus:''' Couldn't he explain all the important stuff in a real operation, with story and everything behind it?\
143'''slowbeef:''' Or couldn't he just cut up a bum and get arrested, so I don't have to watch this?\
144[...]\
145'''Diabetus:''' Well, that was kind of a sloppy suture.\
146'''slowbeef:''' Come on, man. You're a doctor. Show us how it-no, not just the... I'm sorry I left a gaping hole in your chest, Mr. Johnson. They call me Dr. Butterfingers.\
147'''Diabetus:''' He was suturing the wound under the wound.\
148'''slowbeef:''' Let's make sure he's got-no! He just stitched ''into'' the wound!\
149'''Diabetus:''' Good? How is that good?\
150'''slowbeef:''' It's like the game knows he's got a four-year-old's capacity.
151* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g9MUU8mbjTw Choose from: watching an LP, a lamp, or some Mario figures]]'': Take a typical camcorder LP, and change the focus such that the camcorder is filming slightly above and to the right of the monitor, thus displaying two Mario figurines and a lamp more prominently then actual gameplay.
152* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8t6vLf8I_2s Coming this fall...]]''
153-->'''LetsPlay/HCBailly:''' I'd go as far as to say this is the most balanced RPG I've ever played.\
154'''slowbeef:''' What kind of ad for VideoGame/ChronoTrigger is ''that?!'' "Very balanced: Website/GameFAQs".\
155'''Diabetus:''' I guess that means if you put the cartridge on your head, it won't fall off.\
156...\
157'''LetsPlay/HCBailly:''' So, that's all for this preview episode.\
158'''Diabetus:''' ''Preview'' episode.\
159'''slowbeef:''' Wait, it's a preview?!\
160'''Diabetus:''' You know, like when you watch the movie previews before the actual...thing.\
161'''slowbeef:''' But it's not like The Watchmen, it's some asshole playing VideoGame/ChronoTrigger! Who cares?\
162...\
163'''[=HCBailly=]:''' I played this game at least 15 times.\
164'''Diabetus:''' ''15?''\
165'''slowbeef:''' Isn't it like a 20 hour game?\
166'''Diabetus:''' Yeah, so 20 times 15, that equals... how many reasons you shouldn't watch this video.\
167'''slowbeef:''' It equals 300, like pounds in this guy's ass!
168* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MZ5CUs1ORKI Cool Minecraft Audio Mods!]]'' features a Minecraft [=PvPer=] whose commentary mostly consists of heavy breathing into the microphone, loud, [[ImmodestOrgasm strangely sexual groaning]] and loud keyboard clacking, punctuated with the occasional slurred [[CountryMatters references to female anatomy]] and other expletives.
169* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nJyoCRaavbI Cornshaq, baby, please...]]'' Their entire tirade near the end, culminating in "My response will not take any longer than 10 minutes, because that is the [=YouTube=] limit." There's also the bonus after the video ends, where they realize that Cornshaq ''never stopped talking throughout the entire video'', and burst into laughter when the video cuts him off. It's almost ''even funnier'' in [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hu6lUsOtjkY the second]] [=YouTube=] version, where their own reaction gets cut off by the [=YouTube=] time limit.
170-->'''Diabetus''': This is back in the day where Let's Plays were called [[MotorMouth Let's Listen To Me Never Stop Fucking Talking]]!
171** When Cornshaq picks Luigi:
172-->'''Cornshaq:''' I will be playing as nothing ''but'' Luigi.\
173'''Proteus:''' Yeah, nothin' ''but'' Luigi, mothafucker!\
174'''slowbeef:''' YEAH, DON'T YOU EVEN TRIP, SON!\
175'''Proteus''': You're not gonna bring some Mario in this house, motherfuck?\
176'''slowbeef''': ''Fuck that Toad shit, mothafucka.''\
177'''Proteus''': Yeah motherfuckers. Only ''pussies'' use Toad.\
178'''slowbeef''': ''Look at me kicking my legs like a gangsta!''\
179...\
180'''Cornshaq:''' If I'm not gonna die...\
181'''slowbeef:''' Why are you not gonna die?\
182'''Cornshaq:''' Why waste the time?\
183'''slowbeef:''' ''[laughter]'' YO, THIS SHIT, THIS KICKS LP HOT, SON! [[BadassBoast I AIN'T GONNA DIE, 'CAUSE IT'S A WASTE OF MY TIME! LUIGI, YO!]]\
184...\
185'''slowbeef:''' ''[imitating Cornshaq]'' "I'm called this because I have a corncob up my left nostril and Shaquille O'Neal's dick up my right."
186** After Diabetus believes Cornshaq to be like the kid who gets ignored by the teacher in class because he never shuts up, all three goons take turns pretending to be Cornshaq and his teacher.
187-->'''slowbeef''': Anyone else wanna answer this question?\
188'''Proteus''': Does anybody have the answer?\
189'''Diabetus''': The question wasn't about ''VideoGame/SuperMarioBros2''.\
190'''Proteus''': Anybody besides Jason? ''Anybody besides Jason?'' Okay, fine Jason. What's the answer?\
191'''slowbeef''': ''[imitating "Jason"]'' "Well, it's a lot like Mario 2 where you pick up a mushroom. It's weird-"\
192'''Proteus''': Okay, Jason. We gotta move on from Mario 2.\
193'''Diabetus''': "This is why I go in a bathysphere and put a fish bowl on my head and go into outer space in an astronaut suit."\
194'''slowbeef''': "Mr. Neal. The answer to this multiplication problem is twelve but also Mario 2 is the greatest game ever."\
195'''Proteus''': "Houston, we have Mario 2. I repeat. ''We have Mario 2.''"\
196'''slowbeef''': Someone, please. Michelle? David? Anyone wanna answer?\
197'''Diabetus''': "Uhh... I would like to answer for Michelle if I may?"\
198'''Proteus''': No, Jason. ''No, no.''\
199'''Diabetus''': "She reminds me a lot of Birdo because Birdo is a girl."\
200'''slowbeef''': "I told David in recess that I made a [=YouTube=] video of Mario 2. I call it the LetsPlay."\
201'''Proteus''': Jason, it's nothing like Mario 2, for the hundredth time!\
202'''slowbeef:''' "But it really is!"\
203'''Diabetus:''' "My response will not take longer than 10 minutes, because that is the [=YouTube=] limit."\
204'''slowbeef:''' "I do not have the ti--" ''[[[{{Corpsing}} bursts into laughter]] [[DoubleTake as the comment catches him off-guard]].]''\
205'''Proteus:''' [[{{Corpsing}} AH-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!]]
206** Near the 10 minute mark:
207-->'''Proteus''': Is it gonna cut him off? Wait a minute.\
208''*Video ends abruptly*''\
209'''Proteus''': '''[[BigYes YES!!!]]'''.
210-->''*slowbeef and Diabetus burst into hysterical laughter again.*''\
211\
212'''Diabetus''': This is just a big prank on the entire Let's Play community.\
213'''slowbeef''': ''[laughter]'' We have a community, it's great. '''And Cornshaq's undermining it!'''
214* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rDN0xzWNkzI&feature=fvwrel Da--]]'', where they view a 14-second video and then somehow manage to talk about it for 2:30 afterward.
215* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M8pk_YDiS7E Daft23 Wants To Be The Guy!]]'', a riff on a trainwreck of an ''VideoGame/IWannaBeTheGuy'' LP, complete with game crashes, slowdown, and nasally singing.
216-->'''[=Daft23=]:''' I've also got a friend over right now.\
217'''slowbeef:''' Did you hear that? He has a friend over! This is how he entertains guests!\
218'''Diabetus:''' "So what do you wanna do today?" "Well, I'm doing a LetsPlay of ''VideoGame/IWannaBeTheGuy''. Perhaps you saw me in the cybercafe earlier? Yeah, I got a lot of high fives."\
219'''slowbeef:''' "I thought we were gonna play video games together." "No, you be quiet while I talk into a microphone and play by myself."\
220'''Diabetus:''' "No, I think you'd have a lot more fun if you watched me play this game."\
221'''slowbeef:''' Maybe it's Tyler again. He's just friends with all these people.\
222'''Diabetus:''' Tyler's like, "Maybe I can go to my other friend's house." "C'mon Tyler, watch me play this game and shut up."\
223...\
224'''[=Daft23=]:''' Uh, I can touch wherever, actually. I just can't touch--\
225'''Diabetus:''' A girl!
226** slowbeef comments at about four and a half minutes in, as [=Daft23=] is back in the room, he started the video for the ''third'' time in the video, that there's "no editing necessary". With perfect comedic timing, [=Daft23=] attempts to show his guest something, and then after an "oops", the video immediately cuts to an entirely different run.
227--->'''[=Daft23=]:''' Alright, welcome back, sorry I just had to...\
228'''Diabetus:''' What the--?\
229'''slowbeef:''' I think he edited.\
230'''Diabetus:''' Oh, wait, you did editing ''there'', but you didn't edit out the first two parts? [[SarcasmMode Thank you, thank you.]]\
231'''slowbeef:''' What the hell do you think he cut?! ''(both of them crack up)'' Holy Jesus!\
232'''Diabetus:''' "I was actually making some progress in the game, so I decided to cut that part and do this again. Thought you guys might appreciate that."\
233'''slowbeef:''' "It was getting a little too interesting for other people to watch."\
234'''Diabetus:''' "Oh, I actually got to Kraidgief! Eh, they don't wanna see that. They wanna see me sing Tetris some more!"\
235'''[=Daft23=]:''' ''(on cue, enters the Tetris room and begins loudly humming the music again)''\
236'''slowbeef:''' ''(mixture of laughter and anger)'' Oh my fucking ''Christ!''
237* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rh99Yp4KcCk‎ Daily Vlogs! X]]'' has a {{Keet}} {{Cloudcuckoolander}} [=LPer=] who wears a fuzzy ''VideoGame/{{Mega Man|classic}}'' (classic) hat while playing ''VideoGame/{{Mega Man X|1}}'' on scarecam. He also clouds the video with annotations to two ''Words With Friends'' and ''VideoGame/{{Super Mario RPG}}'' episodes, along with buttons for his [[BoldInflation DAILY VLOGS]] and [+'''[[BoldInflation MAIN]]'''+] channel. Needless to say, the [=RPers=] have a lot of fun with this.
238** Then, near the end of the video, the [=LPer=] gets the boots upgrade capsule and remarks "this is exciting". slowbeef completely loses it:
239-->'''{{LetsPlay/slowbeef}}:''' ''How?'' How the fuck is this exciting? ''How the '''FUCK''' is this exciting?!''\
240'''LetsPlay/ChipCheezum:''' Look, I can't even socialize with people normally anymore, the only way I can talk to people is ''through'' [[RunningGag daily vlogs.]]
241** After this, the [=LPer=] finds a Ride Armor:
242-->'''Klitzner:''' Oh... my... [[UnusualEuphemism robot.]]\
243'''slowbeef:''' Go fuck yourself! '''GO FUCK YOURSELF!''' "Oh my robot"...\
244'''Diabetus:''' That doesn't even make sense.\
245...\
246'''Klitzner:''' Again, thanks so much for watching, click on my main channel, watch some other videos - hey, ''get involved...''\
247'''slowbeef:''' '''''GET INVOLVED?!''''' Are you part of an environmental group? What are you ''talking'' about?!
248* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b1jugvly9Ds&list=PL2AEAF822976D07F7&index=1 Desert Storm by Vlad the Implaer]]'' consists of a monotone foreigner, whose manner of speech is instantly noticed and mocked by the goons.
249-->'''Proteus:''' This guy sounds like he's been shell-shocked for six years.
250* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1xfcbLWgQAo DOOM, an action-packed spoken word album]]''; what happens when an informative Lets Play [[CaptainObvious goes very wrong]].
251-->'''slowbeef:''' He's going over ''the difficulty levels?'' Hey, believe me pal, you are not too young to die and I can make that happen.
252* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o77hfsiG2Po Fassaaddddd-backspace-backspace]]'', featuring a ''VideoGame/Facade2005'' player who can't type to save his life, including taking ''[[{{Irony}} ten tries]]'' [[{{EpicFail}} to spell the word "stupid" right]].
253* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9BnSed261Vw Fictional Animal Breeding 101]]''
254-->'''slowbeef:''' Doesn't [the Chocobo subquest] take, like, 20 hours, though? I think it's kind of the point where, like, a lot of people grow up and realize [=RPGs=] like this can get really boring and grindy?\
255'''Diabetus:''' But when you think about it, he's really doing the Website/YouTube community a service, because, you know, there's no website or anything out there that you could, say, read to find a guide or, say, an '''[[Website/GameFAQs FAQ]]''' for a '''[[Website/GameFAQs game]]''' that would tell you how to do this.\
256'''slowbeef:''' Well, you know what else too, it's that there's no other games you could be playing, there's no other ''Franchise/FinalFantasy'' games that are more fun, there's nothing else to do in the game that's better...\
257'''Diabetus:''' Well, the year's 2009, what game are you gonna play except one that was released in 1997 and looks really horrible by today's standards...if only there was another way to explain this in a more...concise format...\
258'''slowbeef:''' No, Website/YouTube videos are going to be everything, dude. Soon you won't even need school.\
259'''Diabetus:''' '' 'And now American History by H.C. Bailey: Well, first the two chocobos bred aboard the Mayflower and founded America and breeded a GREAT country. It was called America C.' ''\
260'''slowbeef:''' Forget about American History, let's talk about worthwhile things, like video games from '96!
261* [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kBCEMGW4VOU "FIGHT CLUB!!!" he whispered, in all caps]] has a wannabe-gangster playing the Fight Club minigame in ''VideoGame/SaintsRow2'', while whispering taunts.
262-->'''IAMAFACILITATOR:''' Oh you ''*whispers*'' bitch...\
263'''Diabetus:''' He had to whisper that swear in case his parents hear. "How dare you, ''bitch''!"\
264'''slowbeef:''' ''Bitch''. ''They're asleep in the next room, I gotta do Saint's Row 2 Fight Club really quietly''.\
265'''Diabetus:''' ''God damn it. It's a thug's life, yo.''\
266'''slowbeef:''' ''I wrote that on my stomach in Sharpie. Don't tell mom or big sister.''\
267'''Diabetus:''' ''See my Twitter for some hot disses on those fuckas''.\
268'''slowbeef:''' ''I'm a facilitator of tweets until last year, when Mom caught me.''\
269'''Diabetus:''' ''I know my name's in all caps, but I'm whispering it at an all caps level''.
270* [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oX_2IH7ZBfU F.E.A.R. (Fiercely Excessive Audio Rendering) 2]]: A 'death montage' where the clips are spliced up so small that nothing makes sense.
271-->'''slowbeef:''' It's like, one second of something, and then it just flashes to something new.
272* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D3KuSkAto6o Five Minutes With Yamimash]]'', a ''VideoGame/FiveNightsAtFreddys'' video in which we meet Yamimash, a Let's Player so obnoxious that they theorize that even LetsPlay/PewDiePie would find his act to be too much. Literally ''every word he says'' is accompanied by text of what he says and/or some kind of terrible VisualPun.
273** Also noteworthy is slowbeef's TakeThat against the people questioning the logic of the game.
274-->'''slowbeef''': I'm lookin' here in the comments and people are like, "Why doesn't (the security guard) just bring a gun the first day?" Like, do you not ...fuckin' ...understand how horror ''works''?
275* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HdQaplOI_Gg The Future of Video Games TODAY!]]'': TheRuleOfFirstAdopters is in full effect with this Platform/OculusRift TechDemoGame. Slowbeef speculates that the game is a trap set by the FBI.
276-->'''[=LPer=]:''' ''[while looking up a girl's skirt]'' [[CreepyMonotone That's nice.]]\
277'''Diabetus:''' ''[[[NotSoStoic audibly upset]]]'' No, it's not!\
278''[Something on the floor is censored with the words "MY EYES!"]''\
279'''slowbeef:''' Oh, good God! ''[as the [=LPer=]]'' And this [=YouTube=] video is why I lived alone the rest of my life.\
280'''Diabetus:''' I mean, if you're resigned to dying alone, I guess it's nice.\
281[...]\
282'''slowbeef:''' [[PoesLaw I don't understand the developers' point of view]], 'cause it's like they're making fun of people like this, but they ''did'' make the fucking game.
283* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8lVbOGffLeI GOD HATES POOCHYENAS]]'': The [=RPers=] are shocked when the [=LPer=] playing ''[[VideoGame/PokemonRubyAndSapphire Pokémon Emerald]]'', starts calling a Poochyena a "faggot". They start with the idea that he's a closet Poochyena lover. At the end, they notice that the [=LPer=]'s icon is an angry [[Franchise/SonicTheHedgehog Tails]] and note that he really isn't the most manliest of people for his homophobic rants.
284** Partway through, slowbeef suggests taking up a "faggot counter" for every time he used that word. By the time it ends, it's up into the 20s.
285** An observation about the LP partway through:
286--> '''[=VoidBurger=]:''' Is this technically gay bashing? Because he's only fighting "faggot" Pokémon here.
287* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vt2sg_NahiA God Damn]]'': Everything involving the "God Sandwich."
288* The opening line to ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xy2KAdKWvkA Happy Halloween!]]''
289-->'''Queenie Z''': Hello everybody, welcome to my Let's Play ''VideoGame/EternalDarkness: Sanity's Re-quee-um''.
290-->'''Diabetus:''' [[ThisIsGonnaSuck I have a good feeling about this.]]
291** And later on:
292-->'''Queenie Z''': So, without further ado, let's play ''Eternal Darkness: Sanity's Re-quee-um''.
293-->'''Dave_o''': Requiem!
294-->'''slowbeef''': No no no, it's re-quee-um, you know, like she likes to eat at Dairy Quee-um?
295** Also, this:
296-->'''slowbeef''': ''([[SarcasmMode lethargically]])'' This game is so scary, even the intro is scary, I mean, I'm terrified.
297-->'''Dave_o''': No, I think the intro is scared of Queenie_Z. ''(referring to the game's Silicon Knights logo)'' Notice how the words move ''away'' from the screen.
298** Dave_o, who is far and away the calmest and most deadpan of the guests, actually gets angry during the video.
299*** Along with that at the very start you can hear what is clearly a bong hit coming from a mic, most likely Dave_o considering his calm attitude and slurred voice during the video.
300* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mp1Fk4PpWB0 Happy Happy Video Crappy]]'', the guys take on an ''incredibly'' annoying Let's Player playing ''Brutal Mario''.
301-->'''Player:''' Creepy creepy toilet sleepy!\
302'''slowbeef:''' Oof, OK, that was, that was the equivalent of nails on a chalkboard for me.\
303'''Diabetus:''' You're not a fan of 'creepy creepy toilet sleepy'?\
304'''slowbeef:''' No, its - is that like a catchphrase- it's - aah!
305** What can only be described as a BigLippedAlligatorMoment about 2/3 of the way through.
306-->''[the [=LPer=] successfully completes a level through the secret exit]''\
307'''[=LPer=]:''' YES! HAHAHAHA! Just what I needed!\
308'''slowbeef:''' Oh Jesus. Where does he get his little like Gollum friends to help him on commentary from time to time?\
309''(The video suddenly cuts to a different level.)''\
310'''slowbeef:''' ''Now what the hell is this!?''\
311'''[=LPer=]:''' ''(Speaking with his voice noticeably echoed)'' Eighth time's the charm, right guys?
312* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bMaT3k1ZWos Harrison Bored]]'', an Indiana Jones LP, has the video comments and description.
313-->Willie Scott: What is that?\
314Lao Che: A Retsupurae.\
315Indiana Jones: Retsupurae for what?\
316Lao Che: The LP you just watched, Doctor Jones!\
317...\
318"He sticks out like a sore thumb. We'll retsupurae him."\
319"The hell you will. He's got a five-year head start on you, which is more than he needs. He's got friends on every channel from here to Blip, he has a dozen pieces of recording software, knows every local meme. He'll partner up, get rich. You'll never riff his videos again. With any luck, he's #1 Subscribed on Website/YouTube already."\
320'''Cut to this video.'''\
321"Uh... did anyone here thumbs-up my vid?"
322** This moment from the first five seconds.
323-->'''[=LPer=]:''' On a very personal note... I am dead...\
324...\
325'''[=LPer=]:''' (Singing) ''In the chiiiiiill of night'' -fuck you- ''arrives just in time...''\
326(The goons both laugh.)\
327'''Diabetus:''' Actual lyrics.\
328'''slowbeef:''' This is a remix, is the thing!\
329'''Diabetus:''' Right.
330* [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lTY_xfeDkxA How to Mess Up A Cookie Clicker Let's Play]] has slowbeef and Mr. [=DJB=] tackling someone's awkward attempt at [=LPing=] ''VideoGame/CookieClicker''. It forces [=DJB=] to flip his monitor 90 degrees at the beginning and his attempt to flip it back causes him to knock it over, leaving slowbeef to realize he can now sue the Let's Player for damages!
331* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vSd-9ZVbZA4 Huzzah!]]'' posits that you can pick any [=DeceasedCrab=] video and it will be the same as any other, or put any video's audio over any of his other videos and accomplish the same purpose. Then about halfway through, it's revealed they recorded their commentary beforehand and ''did'' paste it over a random video, and the experiment ''works''.
332* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xUVDXyUWO6c "I won't have my son playing no pussy DS games"]]'' is just about entirely funny, thanks in part to shmorky's presence alongside slowbeef and Diabetus. One thing that stands out is their AlternateCharacterInterpretation that the player is playing this game to prove to his dad that Warioware isn't feminine.
333-->'''Impression of player's dad:''' Maybe this game ain't so girly after all.
334* ''[[VideoGame/{{Parodius}} Jikkyu Oshaberi Parodius]] - [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G8B5UxxX63o The Only Thing Harder to Spell than Retsupurae]]'' features endless riffing on the [=LPer's=] affinity for penguins, food, and Japan.
335-->'''slowbeef:''' It's hard to hold a controller when you're busy eating Twizzlers. ''Japanese Twizzlers!''\
336'''Shmorky:''' They're called Twi-- Twi-- um, augh...\
337'''slowbeef:''' They're called Twizzle-sans!
338** Near the end, the [=LPer=] utters a simple [[GoshDangItToHeck "Ooh, crud!"]] after already saying "Oh crap!" plenty of times, and Retsupurae pounces:
339-->'''slowbeef and Shmorky:''' Oh crud!\
340'''Diabetus:''' Now I don't want to swear, but ''crud!''\
341'''Shmorky:''' Yeah, crud! ''Fuckin' crud!''
342* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zq6tPZiOdNg Kane and Lynch's Spring Break]]'' starts out poking fun of a heavily-accented [=LPer=] playing ''VideoGame/KaneAndLynch: Dog Days''... only to instead begin mocking the game because the in-game situation is just ''[[NakedPeopleAreFunny that ridiculous]].''
343[[/folder]]
344
345[[folder:Retsupuraes L]]
346* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YbvZeOnHI_w Let's 'ave a carriage ride]]'', their first encounter with LetsPlay/ElectricalBeast and his incredible accent and storytelling.
347-->'''Electrical Beast:''' Everything's moving a lot faster. That's because the time machine is getting a lot stronger now...\
348'''Diabetus:''' What're you talking about?! What's happening? What universe are we in right now?\
349'''slowbeef:''' Film/MaryPoppins Land, apparently.\
350...\
351'''Electrical Beast:''' So we're nearly at the top, guys! We're doing extremely well...\
352'''Diabetus:''' "You didn't believe me when I said this tower was really tall! I fooled you fuckers, didn't I?!"\
353'''slowbeef:''' "Ha-ha-ha, you wankers!"\
354'''Electrical Beast:''' And look how high down it is, it's an extremely high level...\
355'''Diabetus:''' "This supports my hypothesis that it's a really tall level, can you believe it! We're employing the scientific method and having edutainment!"
356** Electrical Beast pronounces the mission's name.
357-->'''Electrical Beast''': Get An 'and!\
358'''slowbeef''': "Get An 'and?"\
359'''Diabetus''': I'm pretty sure there's an H in "hand," "''hand.''"
360* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nv4NgkE8rso Let's be horrified]]'' features a camcorder LP by Rijno, who slowbeef and Diabetus very quickly decide they hate:
361-->'''Rijno:''' Um... [[VerbalTic Okay.]]\
362'''slowbeef:''' Stop saying okay. Nothing's okay. There is absolutely nothing okay about what is going on right now.\
363...\
364'''Rijno:''' PUNCH IN THE FACE!\
365'''Diabetus:''' Yes, that is what Donkey Kong just did. Congratulations, you passed kindergarden.\
366...\
367'''Diabetus:''' By the way, this guy's done 522 videos.\
368'''slowbeef:''' ''[laughter]''\
369'''Diabetus:''' You'd think somewhere in there, someone would maybe mention, you know...the downsides...\
370'''slowbeef:''' I wish to God I was, like, the head of [=YouTube=], so I could just bring his count to zero and say 'No. None of these count. None of these are videos. You have fucked up on a website where a cat playing a piano - er, walking on a piano - is good.'\
371'''Diabetus:''' Well, I wish I was the head of [=YouTube=] who also had, like, deity powers, so I could just take away this guy's entire existence.\
372'''slowbeef:''' Yeah, I wish you could just knock HIM off the screen.\
373'''Diabetus:''' Though, when you think about it, deleting his videos would basically be the same as eliminating this guy's existence, because...this guy's got nothing else.
374** Any time they imitate Rijno is pretty good. Especially one portion toward the middle.
375-->'''slowbeef''': Could you imagine if this guy was like trying to make a real film? It'd just be like running around with camcorders and knocking into Heath Ledger.\
376'''Diabetus''': This guy should have directed ''Film/TheDarkKnight''.\
377'''slowbeef''': Just in the middle of it being like '''"OKAY CUT! NO DON'T CUT, KEEP GOING!"''' and he just left that in.\
378'''Diabetus''': Uh, Mr. Rijno, did you want to have yourself speaking over the movie? '''"YES."'''\
379'''slowbeef''': '''"CAPE, THERE'S BATMAN. OKAY."'''\
380'''Diabetus''': '''"CLOWN MAKEUP...LAUGHTER, THAT WAS FUNNY."'''\
381[...]\
382'''slowbeef''': Sir, you're sure you want to use a camcorder for this? '''"OKAY."''' ... He's filming with a big camera, '''"THIS CAMERA SURE IS BIG, I WONDER WHAT THEY USE IT FOR."'''\
383'''Diabetus''': '''"HOW CAN I FILM THIS ON MY TV SCREEN INSTEAD OF REAL LIFE?"'''\
384'''slowbeef''': '''"IF I CAN SOMEHOW LET'S PLAY A GAME THROUGH A 7-11 CONVENIENCE STORE. THAT WOULD BE THE BEST CAMERA, THAT WOULD BE THE BEST."'''\
385'''Diabetus''': That would be heaven for him.\
386'''slowbeef''': Exactly, he's picking up his microwaveable burrito and he's like "Yeah, you know what? That camera's where it's at." ... "Sir, that'll be $5.75." '''"$10 BILL! CHANGE! OKAY!"'''
387* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e1j0D3EPbJ0 Let's Play Call of Duty For Six Minutes then...]]'' The aforementioned six minutes see the team riffing on a pair of British people playing ''[[VideoGame/ModernWarfare Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare]]'' with a camcorder pointed at the TV at an angle. Then the source video ends with a fictional threat from Russia against the winning player conveyed through subtitles over stock footage of a speech. The riffers are stunned.
388* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iWwsPqioAaQ Let's Play Final Fantasy (student gov't edition)]]'' has a bored-sounding Let's Player ramble about politics while playing ''VideoGame/FinalFantasyI'', leading to some thought-provoking commentary from the boys.
389-->'''Diabetus:''' First they came for my guns, but next will they come for my Firagas?
390* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nNMudMlmdOE Let's Freak Out!]]'' starts off with a memorable intro and gets funnier from there.
391-->'''[=Violinbow3=]:''' ''[Straining himself]'' Welcome to... My attempt-\
392'''Diabetus:''' '''WELCOME TO MY ATTEMPT TO ''[[ToiletHumor TAKE A SHIT]]''!'''
393** There's also this uncomfortable close-up.
394-->''[[=Violinbow3=] shoves his controller in front of his camcorder]''\
395'''[=Violinbow3=]:''' It's a real N64!\
396'''slowbeef:''' What-yeah, I believe you.\
397'''Diabetus:''' I'm going to leave a comment right now saying 'Thank you for showing me your controller. I was wanting to see that, so I would know were playing an authentic N64'.\
398'''slowbeef:''' A second earlier, I was like 'Does he actually have a controller?' Oh, hey!\
399'''Diabetus:''' I mean, right now I'm wondering if he really is playing at an awkward camera angle on his TV.\
400'''slowbeef:''' Can't these people at least ''line it up''? Like, you can ''sit off'' to the side and still do it, it's like '[[ItsAllAboutMe No, I need to be front and center!]]'\
401...\
402'''slowbeef:''' What is this kid doing...\
403'''[=Violinbow3=]:''' Wheeeeeeeeeeee'''EEE'''''eeeeeeeeeee''!!\
404'''slowbeef:''' Oh my god, did his voice just crack? I think he hit puberty in that mushroom boost!\
405...\
406'''[=Violinbow3=]:''' ''(coughs)'' That's two in a row!\
407'''Diabetus:''' Is this guy, like, dying of an illness? He [[IncurableCoughofDeath keeps coughing.]]\
408'''slowbeef:''' I hope so.\
409'''Diabetus:''' His one wish to the Make-a-Wish Foundation was to come in first place in the 150cc, in Mario Kart. ''(slowbeef laughs)'' And the Make-a-Wish Foundation was like, "fuck you, kid".\
410...\
411'''[=Violinbow3=]:''' Yeah!\
412'''slowbeef:''' ''That's'' his commentary. 'Yeah!'\
413'''Diabetus:''' 'You remember that sweet trick I pulled, two minutes ago?'\
414'''slowbeef:''' 'Yeah!'\
415'''Diabetus:''' 'Booyah! EEEEEEEEEEEEEE!'\
416...\
417''(after winning the third race; [=Violinbow3=] starts audibly mashing every button on his controller to try to get past the results screen faster)''\
418'''slowbeef:''' I'm sorry?\
419'''Diabetus:''' Did he just beat off with the controller?\
420'''slowbeef:''' ''(under his breath)'' Oh God.\
421'''[=Violinbow3=]:''' I'm only gonna have to take four minutes on this!\
422'''Diabetus:''' 'Hugoaugh!'\
423'''slowbeef:''' 'Shit!'\
424''(the next course loads, and [=Violinbow3=] immediately begins repeatedly changing between close-in and far-away camera angles)''\
425'''Diabetus:''' What is- stop that. Stop that ''immediately.'' That is... filthy.\
426'''slowbeef:''' ''(laughing)'' It kind of is.\
427...\
428''([=Violinbow3=] rams into a train and wipes out)''\
429'''[=Violinbow3=] and Wario:''' Nooooooooaaaaaarrrrrrgggghhhhh!!\
430'''Diabetus:''' Holy shit!\
431'''slowbeef:''' Uh...okay...\
432'''Diabetus:''' Sorry, I had to remove my headset and pour bleach into my ears after that.\
433'''slowbeef:''' Oh my lord. You got any left?\
434'''Diabetus:''' No, I'm sorry, I had to use two hundred bottles.
435** The final race is where [=Violinbow3=] really goes off the rails.
436-->'''[=Violinbow3=]:''' ''[After wiping out for the second time.]'' How'd Yoshi do- How the ''[[PrecisionFStrike fuck]]'' did Yoshi get that far?\
437'''slowbeef:''' Whoa! Calm down with the language there sonny.\
438'''Diabetus:''' That's a little vindictive, pal. Calm down.\
439'''slowbeef:''' It's great when he loses, '''"HOW THE FUCK DID YOSHI GET THERE?"'''\
440'''Diabetus:''' His guidance counselor's trembling in the corner.\
441'''slowbeef:''' ''"Whee! Yay!'' '''PEACH YOU FUCKING CUNT, I'LL KILL YOU!"'''\
442'''Diabetus:''' '''"THIS GAME CATERS WELL TO MY BIPOLAR DISORDER!"'''\
443'''slowbeef:''' '''"I'LL TEACH YOU ALL! YOU DON'T FUCK WITH [=VIOLINBOW3=]!!"'''\
444'''Diabetus:''' '''"ONCE TOAD WINS IN ALL THREE RACES- FOUR RACES, IT'LL SUMMON THE GREAT SATAN!"'''\
445'''[=Violinbow3=]:''' ''[Hits a fake power block]'' NOOO! [[GoshDangItToHeck God dang it!]]\
446'''Diabetus:''' After all that swearing, "Gosh carnsar it!"
447** Near the end of the first race.
448-->'''Diabetus:''' Well, I do gotta say, [[TakeThat for this guy's personality]], he picked the right character.\
449...\
450'''slowbeef:''' [[RootingForTheEmpire I never rooted for the computer players before in Mario Kart.]]
451* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wEwRY22XPiE Let's... I can't even pretend to guess]]''
452** While [[MakesJustAsMuchSenseInContext Luigi chases Waluigi through]] [[VideoGame/MarioKartWii Coconut Mall]].
453-->'''slowbeef:''' Wait a minute. The title of this is "Super Luigi Universal 4: The Intense Chase."\
454'''Diabetus:''' This is the ''fourth'' episode?\
455'''slowbeef:''' This is intense?
456* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=27VeT3dVQE8 Let's Play Half Blind I mean Life]]''
457-->'''thehof''': Going a little fast here.\
458'''slowbeef''': Yes. Slow down.\
459'''Diabetus''': I can't get that difficulty reading in my head.\
460'''Dave_o''': Holy shit, "Normal?" This guy's a madman.\
461...\
462''[While thehof does "[[ShoutOut shout outs]]" during the game's loading screen.]''\
463'''Dave_o:''' I'd like to do some shout outs.\
464'''Diabetus:''' Okay.\
465'''Dave_o:''' Shout out to thehof's mom for gracing us with a valuable human being.\
466'''slowbeef:''' Yes, definitely.\
467'''Dave_o:''' Shout out to this TV that was probably manufactured before I was born.\
468'''slowbeef:''' Probably found in the trash.\
469''[Cut to excruciatingly bright graphics]''\
470'''Dave_o:''' ''[[[DeadpanSnarker completely deadpan]]]'' Shout out to what remains of my retinas.\
471...\
472'''slowbeef:''' This is like the stupidest drug trip ever! Like, "Oh man, I'm tripping! I took ''four aspirin!''"\
473'''Diabetus:''' "I didn't sleep in ''24 hours!''"\
474'''Dave_o:''' "Holy shit! I left a dark room! I'm ''fucked up!''"\
475...\
476'''thehof:''' [[CaptainObvious If you look off to the left, you see a bunch of guys.]]\
477'''Diabetus:''' [[SarcasmMode Wow.]]\
478'''slowbeef:''' [[SarcasmMode Thank you]]! He's like the world's stupidest tour guide!\
479'''Diabetus:''' I take back everything I said about this game's lack of action.\
480...\
481'''Caption:''' [[HardCut Sorry for the abrupt ending.]] [[BasementDweller My mother called me upstairs]] [[BigLippedAlligatorMoment to hang a plant outside.]] [[PleaseSubscribeToOurChannel If you like this part... subscribe to my videos in the corner. Give me a good rating below the video. Thanks for watching!]]\
482''[slowbeef bursts into hysterical laughter]''\
483'''Dave_o:''' Why didn't he post a video of ''that?'' It would be ''way'' more entertaining!\
484'''Diabetus:''' "The plant hanging scene was ''amazing!'' I'm subscribing!"\
485'''Dave_o:''' [[RunningGag I wanna do a shout out to thehof's mom for ending this abruptly.]]
486** Dave_o points out that the video quality was so bad, thehof needed to stand on a seat and look down at the black floor just so he could read the game's white text.
487-->'''Dave_o:''' He has to stand a certain way so he can fuckin' read it!
488** Immediately following the guys' initial reactions to the excruciatingly-bright video, thehof goes into the console [[FromBadToWorse and turns on fullbright.]]
489* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7dUPLLMJpiY Let's Play Headaches]]'' features an inept LP of ''Dark Seed'' with incompatible audio, resulting in a phone ringing sounding like a fork scraping a concrete block.
490* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cGRsUELHzyM Let's Play *incomprehensible*]]'' (titled here as ''Lets Play: People on [=YouTube=], Retsupray and Sound Puking'') has [=SuperCrazyHealthBar=] yelling in an incomprehensible manner, which basically is where the comedy takes place here, but the part at 1:41 is where gold happened.
491-->'''[=SuperCrazyHealthBar=]''': I can't even see at this point. I don't even know what is happening.\
492'''Diabetus''': You can't see? Let's Players can't Let's Play if they can't see! ''That's crazy!''\
493'''slowbeef''': ''[at [=SuperCrazyHealthBar=]]'' You're crazy.\
494'''Diabetus''': That is just nuts! ''How delightfully wacky!''\
495[...]\
496'''[=SuperCrazyHealthBar=]''': Sorry, that was my water. It said "Eat Me".\
497'''Diabetus''': You can't eat water, that's silly! ''Gosh!''\
498'''slowbeef''': Oh, ha ha. How do you do that?\
499[...]\
500'''[=SuperCrazyHealthBar=]:''' (Lets off horrid screech)\
501'''Diabetus:''' Oh, the velociraptors got turned loose in his house!
502* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5KT64t2ITuM&feature=g-vrec Let's Play: No Hope]]'' sees Slowbeef and Diabetus manage to riff most of the video '''using nothing but rephrased quotes from the original ''Franchise/StarWars'' trilogy''' -- a Crowning Moment of both Funny and Awesome.
503* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9N_doneP8n8 Let's Play Parts of Earthbound]]'': The player spends half the video [[DungeonCrawling crawling through]] [[ThatOneLevel a dungeon]], and then [[https://youtu.be/9N_doneP8n8?t=299 suddenly cuts]] to a map he'd been using ''and'' an open Website/GameFAQs page. slowbeef, Psychedelic Eyeball, and cherrydoom spend about twenty seconds laughing as a result. Made funnier due to one of slowbeef's earlier comments being accidental {{Foreshadowing}}.
504** Towards the end, when the [=LPer=] gets annoyed at an NPC for asking him a question and loads a savestate to avoid him. Slowbeef, Psychedelic Eyeball, and cherrydoom erupt into laughter again.
505-->'''slowbeef:''' "HOW DARE YOU ASK ME THAT QUESTION? LOAD STATE! THIS NEVER HAPPENED!"\
506'''cherrydoom:''' "You're dead to me! I never met you!"
507** Near the end of the video:
508-->''[the video abruptly cuts off]''\
509'''slowbeef:''' Oh, just right in the fuckin' middle--\
510'''Psychedelic Eyeball:''' IT FUCKING CUT OFF IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE!!\
511'''slowbeef:''' Do you think like... maybe these people, when they watch TV shows, they just turn the power off twenty minutes in? Like, "welp, show's over."\
512'''Psychedelic Eyeball:''' Yeah, "this is what's on the last season of ''Series/LawAndOrder''. It ended."\
513'''slowbeef:''' "What did you think of the season finale?" "Abrupt!"\
514'''Psychedelic Eyeball:''' "I personally thought it was perfect [[MotorMouth ohboyohboygottagogottagofastforwardfastforward]][[SaveScumming loadstateloadstatesavestate]]arararablahblahblah."\
515'''slowbeef:''' "I just watched the credits and rewound them about six times! Then I fast-forwarded through the rest of the movie so I could get to the end."\
516'''Psychedelic Eyeball:''' "And finally I showed everybody how the credits were done!"
517** When the [=LPer=] fast-forwards through ''more'' dialogue:
518-->'''Psychedelic Eyeball:''' [[SarcasmMode Yeah, sure, because nobody wants to read the text in the RPG!]]\
519'''slowbeef:''' "We wanna fight more ropes, right guys?"\
520'''Psychedelic Eyeball:''' No, actually, I don't want to fight them again, I want to fight the gigantic ants instead!\
521'''slowbeef:''' "LOAD STATE! [[ContinuityNod They look like 'piders.]]"
522** A little earlier in the video, as the [=LPer=] goes off on a tangent about a game he hates:
523-->'''slowbeef:''' Is he just talking about how much he hates video games while he plays one for the internet? Am I out of my mind?\
524'''cherrydoom:''' "I really hate video games. Doing these two hundred and thirty videos... it's the worst thing."
525* [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kszpzJThCrg Let's Play Sonic the Hedgehog, But First Some Strategy]] has [=SuperBrosTV=] spend six minutes and thirty seconds showing an intro, discussing the map for the first zone, and ''trying to get his cat to stop attacking him while he was on scarecam''.
526** He has to get the cat out of his chair first, which annoys it.
527-->'''[=SuperBrosTV=]:''' Come on, you gotta get out of my seat! I gotta start my Let's Play!
528** Then his cat actually starts attacking him, which the duo assume is him attempting to stop [=SuperBrosTV=] from doing an LP.
529-->'''[=SuperBrosTV=]:''' ...unless that little kitty attacks me. I see you, devil, I-yoooowww!\
530'''slowbeef:''' Yeah, see? The cat jumped at him.\
531'''Diabetus:''' The cat scratched him and a bunch of rings exploded out of him.\
532'''slowbeef:''' He's back out of the chair!\
533'''Diabetus:''' Wrangle your cat, dude.\
534'''slowbeef:''' Two minutes in? It's 4:45 in!\
535'''[=SuperBrosTV=]:''' Kitty, kitty, kitty...stay. Now, I think we're ready.\
536'''Diabetus:''' Let's Play Sonic the Hedgehog!\
537'''slowbeef:''' ''[laughter]'' Takes about five minutes of planning and cat setup.\
538'''[=SuperBrosTV=]:''' So, don't kill me...\
539'''slowbeef:''' ''[incredulous]'' Don't kill me?
540* [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E47lUkoV4vU Let's Play Sonic the Hedgehog, But Second...]] continues where "...But First Some Strategy" leaves off, showing the player's complete ineptitude at basically everything (from ''somehow'' managing to get a Game Over in ''GreenHillZone'', to the video's name insisting it will be of Acts 1 and 2, when it's actually of Acts 2 and 3), leading to slowbeef to wonder if he's going to beat the first boss in one try (which he miraculously does), as Diabetus wonders whether [[PoesLaw the player is actually that incompetent]].
541-->'''[=SuperBrosTV=]:''' ''(after having died to spikes)'' That was very, very cheap.\
542'''slowbeef:''' Yeah, what do you know, when you jump into spikes on a dead end it kills you, how 'bout that.\
543'''Diabetus:''' "I had no idea that was there"?\
544'''slowbeef:''' ''(laughs, shortly before [=SuperBrosTV=] dies again on the spikes leading to the spikes he died on last time)'' Oh my lord!\
545'''[=SuperBrosTV=]:''' I don't remember this...\
546'''Diabetus:''' But you just ''showed'' it t... ugh.\
547'''slowbeef:''' ''(cracks up)'' This is actually the ''third'' time we've technically seen the spike trap.\
548'''Diabetus:''' Is the content being recorded in reverse order? Like, he did this then was like, "yeah, I'm gonna show a map first."\
549...\
550'''slowbeef:''' ''(as [=SuperBrosTV=] gets stuck in front of a pipe - similar to one he already traversed twice)'' How do you mess ''that'' up?\
551'''Diabetus:''' He always makes the best use of the invincibility.\
552'''[=SuperBrosTV=]:''' ''(jumps onto yet more spikes)'' Dang it!\
553'''slowbeef:''' Jesus Christ!\
554'''[=SuperBrosTV=]:''' Oh my God! ''(promptly rolls off the platform into an even bigger pit of spikes and dies)''\
555'''slowbeef:''' Stop taking the risky path if you're no good at it!\
556'''[=SuperBrosTV=]:''' Oh, my God, this game- SUCK!\
557'''slowbeef:''' No! No! The game is not the one with the problem!\
558'''[=SuperBrosTV=]:''' Oh my God, I need one-ups. I really need the one-ups.\
559'''slowbeef:''' ''(barely able to speak through laughter) He's stuck in Green Hill Zone!''
560* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZAsihgpbpsc Let's Play Sonic thhhhhe Hhhhhhhhhhhhedddddddddd Hedgehog ggggggggggggg]]'', containing possibly the worst framerates ever seen in one of these videos. The description says all that needs to be said.
561--> "Somehow, an adult made this."
562** Just the fact that the original [=LPer=] did this at 3 in the morning with a shitton of background processes/malware, an ongoing Steam chat, a pending Windows update, and crappy recording software, and they STILL thought it was good enough to upload.
563* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GGuBByxJ5iY Let's Play This!]]''
564-->'''slowbeef:''' All right you ready to uh, watch this one?\
565'''Diabetus:''' Yeah let's do it.\
566'''slowbeef:''' Okay, in three... two... one... go.\
567'''LetsPlay/DeceasedCrab:''' I'm Deceased Crab! Let's Play...\
568'''Diabetus:''' [[ScrewThisImOuttaHere No, fuck this.]]\
569'''slowbeef:''' I can't. I'm sorry. No way. ''[Video abruptly ends]''
570* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p13UXd1xhEo Let's Play... What the hell is this?]]''
571-->'''Diabetus:''' This is [[VideoGame/MetalGearSolid Psycho Mantis]] with the six o'clock news.\
572'''slowbeef:''' I was thinking more "[[Film/MyDinnerWithAndre My Dinner With]] The ''Film/PulpFiction'' Gimp".\
573'''Diabetus:''' Looks to me more like the ''VideoGame/SplinterCell'' guy took an etiquette course.\
574'''slowbeef:''' Ladies and gentlemen, [[VideoGame/NinjaGaiden Ryu Hayabusa]] After Hours.
575** The topic of the video: trying to determine the exchange rate between the in-game currency in a ''Franchise/{{Bratz}}'' video game and the United States dollar. Neither Slowbeef nor Diabetus can figure out what the hell the [=LPer=] is thinking.
576* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K4jwRuZzxEE Let's Play Wii Sports Resort IMMEDIATELY]]'' has slowbeef reaching his breaking point at around the three minute mark as he watches [=HiLeonardo=] play the Swordplay minigames poorly. It's both hilarious and disheartening.
577-->'''slowbeef:''' ''Even his Mii looks stupid. I actually went there.'' This is on a level of retarded so bad I actually had to go into the goddamn Mii.\
578...\
579''[[=HiLeonardo=] plays the Speed Slice minigame.]''\
580'''slowbeef''': Yeah, look see. Use your imagination. Imagine the wonderful things you- ''[[=HiLeonardo=] slices a loaf of bread wrong]'' ...no.\
581'''Diabetus''': "Swing it up-left. That mean straight-down, right?"
582* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hxyNS6dO0XE Let's Read About Survival Kids]]'': feralMMO uploads a LetsPlay about ''Survival Kids''... using barely readable, screen-covering white text instead of a voice. Diabetus provides us with narration.
583-->''"A big wave suddenly OH EM GEE!!! suddenly struck the boat."''
584** ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K9uOKKCRdAs Let's Read About Survival Kids 2]]'':
585-->''"This music fuels XIII's killing mood! Colon equals bracket bracket! DIIIIIIIE!"''
586* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KEWEFdT1JRo Let's Review Number Six Carry the 4 Jurassic Park Warpath Part 1]]'', a video that was removed due to it featuring actual footage of the player (in this case, a kid), which has been preserved by another Website/YouTube user:
587** When our host first appears on screen:
588-->'''slowbeef:''' ''WHAT'' the...?? Ohh...\
589'''Dave_o:''' Is that someone's mom?\
590'''slowbeef:''' I wish he'd review a comb first!
591** When we finally see the game four and half minutes into the review:
592-->'''Dave_o:''' And all that fuckin' build up and it's...'''''THIS?!''''' Fuckin' camcorder with scan lines???\
593'''slowbeef:''' I think he's going to show us these fabled "Options" he spoke of!\
594'''Jeremy:''' And just for you guys, I'm going to set the difficulty-\
595'''slowbeef:''' Oh, what do you know...\
596'''Jeremy:''' -all the '''FUCKING''' way to Hard.\
597'''Dave_o:''' Did he just say '''''“FUCK?!?!?'''''\
598'''slowbeef:''' Uh oh! You're in trouble now, young man!\
599'''Dave_o:''' Where-give me his parents' number.
600** As the character select screen is shown:
601-->'''Dave_o:''' Why do some of the dinosaurs have cute names-did he say "raptor mother fucker"?\
602'''slowbeef:''' I think-''[he cracks up]''\
603'''Dave_o:''' Dude, this kid rules, I would totally buy him beer!\
604'''slowbeef:''' *laughs* I kinda wanna drink with him now!\
605'''Dave_o:''' Yeah, I would get him wasted! It's like "Yo, Jeremy's fuckin' pissed oofffff!"\
606'''slowbeef:''' Just splice it in as he stumbles into the camcorder. "RAPTOR MOTHER FUCKER!" ''CRASH!''
607** As seen earlier in the video, we see Jeremy in a basement with folded laundry next to him on a couch which leads to this:
608-->'''Dave_o:''' The only way this video would be better is if you heard his mom in the background like "...'''''JEREMY!'''''"\
609'''slowbeef:''' "''I TOLD YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP WHEN I’M REVIEWING VIDEO GAMES, you bitch!''"\
610'''Dave_o:''' "''DO MORE LAUNDRY!''"
611** As the video comes to a close:
612-->'''Jeremy:''' ...There should be a Chuck Norris-a-saurus.\
613'''Dave_o:''' A '''''WHAT?'''''\
614'''slowbeef:''' OHHHHHHH...\
615'''Dave_o:''' Wait a minute, “Chuck Norris-a-saurus”? That's almost funny! ''NOOOOOOO!''\
616'''slowbeef:''' You did it. You did it, Jeremy.\
617'''Dave_o:''' You said the worst thing that you could say. Now you’re about to see me get really fuckin' angry.
618* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SD5GD_YaRjU Let's Use a Webcam on an Emulator of Metroid Zero Mission Part 2]]''
619-->''"[[Film/TheWickerMan2006 Killing me won't bring back your GODDAMN chozo!]]"''
620* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JNbsL5-6SZE Local Paperboy's Neighborhood Calls it Quits!]]'':
621-->'''slowbeef:''' Weren't they competing with each other a minute ago?\
622'''Diabetus:''' Oh, the competition never lasts long with these two.\
623'''slowbeef:''' That's true, yeah. Everything's a co-op game.\
624'''Diabetus:''' You say competition, I say ''friendship''.\
625'''slowbeef:''' They could be playing Russian Roulette and it's like, "Well, be careful it's not the chamber, Lime!"\
626...\
627'''[=TheLimePopsicle=]:''' You almost got to "[[Music/{{Friday}} Fri-day, Fri-day]]"...\
628'''Diabetus:''' Uh, that's not what you're supposed to sing, Lime.\
629'''slowbeef:''' I'm sorry I asked for that.\
630'''[=BillyMC=]:''' Oh my God, not Music/RebeccaBlack- No offense to her, I'm sure she's-\
631''[slowbeef and Diabetus crack up]''\
632'''slowbeef:''' "Hold on, Billy, you almost went too far!"\
633'''Diabetus:''' "Billy, once you hit that point, there's no returning, man!"\
634'''[=TheLimePopsicle=]:''' Have you played the second Paperboy very much?\
635'''[=BillyMC=]:''' Not much, but it's difficult, though.\
636'''slowbeef:''' "Not like Rebecca Black difficult-"\
637'''Diabetus:''' "''No, Billy, no!''"
638* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lhYDz2jYh-M A Look At Ancient LP Technology]]'' has the [=LPer=]'s vague accent and a hilariously convoluted way to sync the audio and video, and Retsupurae's commentary about the start of RP technology when the universe was just beginning.
639* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nGBDtXqZeis Love is a Battlefield]]'', a guy playing ''VideoGame/CallOfDuty'' shamelessly hits on a girl he meets on Xbox Live. After beginning the video with an incredibly unconvincing disclaimer that he was only joking.
640-->'''[=FailingAtCOD4=]''': You must get, like, verbally raped by 40-year-old men daily.\
641''[...]''\
642'''[=ChipCheezum=]:''' Wait, what did he... what did he just say? He just asked her if she gets verbally raped by men every day, ''what?'' Did I hear that wrong?\
643'''slowbeef:''' No you didn't. ''Verbally'' raped.\
644'''[=ChipCheezum=]:''' Great, that's a good icebreaker.\
645'''slowbeef:''' It totally is.\
646'''[=ChipCheezum=]:''' You don't even ''break'' the ice, you just vaporize it, bam! Gone! There's nothing to stand on!\
647''[...]''\
648'''[=FailingAtCOD4=]:''' ...that's why I said I don't wanna be a third wheeler in this lot that's why I said I would back out.\
649'''[=ChipCheezum=]:''' Uh, step three of flirting with women, get angry and confrontational.\
650'''slowbeef:''' And shoot her and her male suitor.
651* [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yFSJE7FJ3Jc LP BS Zelda]]
652-->'''[=LPer=]:''' Thanks for the wooden sword, buddy. You want me to save Hyrule...\
653'''slowbeef:''' Oh, quit sassing the old man.\
654'''[=LPer=]:''' ...with a sword made of wood. Well...\
655'''Diabetus:''' Are we gonna get a wood joke out of this?\
656'''[=LPer=]:''' ...I guess...\
657'''slowbeef:''' I guess not.\
658'''[=LPer=]:''' ...lots of people get wood for heroes...\
659'''slowbeef:''' What? Was ''that'' the wood joke?\
660'''Diabetus:''' I guess, he spent that ten seconds of silence thinking up that gold one right there.\
661'''[=LPer=]:''' ...or heroines...\
662'''slowbeef:''' Wait a minute, it took him ten seconds to think up a follow up to that joke?\
663'''Diabetus:''' There's complete silence between 1:50 and two minutes.\
664...\
665''[The [=LPer=] starts singing the SoBadItsGood rap song from the original Zelda commercial]''\
666'''slowbeef:''' That was ''painful''. Did that just happen or did I just dream that?\
667'''Diabetus:''' Yo yo Link don't even give a fuck! Too bad this LP just fuckin sucks!\
668'''slowbeef:''' I'm gonna make another joke about wood! Now to go watch another video that's good!
669** "But I don't want......to go to school."
670* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U0dfnao9HcA LP Mario 64...very slowly.]]'' Single digit framerates for everyone!
671-->"Llllet'sssss plaaaaay Maaaarioooo..." \
672"What we're watching is a tool-assisted slowrun."
673** And upon the revelation that it was in fact ''faster'' than the [=LPer's=] previous video...
674-->'''Diabetus:''' [[[NotSoStoic after a very ''heartily'' laugh]]] What was it before, a Powerpoint presentation?\
675'''slowbeef:''' A series of Polaroids he held up to a webcam?\
676'''Diabetus:''' A bunch of negatives he holds up in front of his digital camcorder?\
677'''slowbeef:''' [[SarcasmFailure No metaphor can encapsulate this!]]\
678...\
679'''slowbeef:''' This is the Let's Play equivalent of running up a down escalator!\
680''[{{Beat}}]''\
681'''Diabetus:''' Running up a down escalator, then switching it to an up escalator and then running back down it.\
682...\
683'''Dave_o:''' According to the comments, he's doing some kind of hack run that lets you beat the game faster, but it's just gonna be the game in the normal amount of time.\
684'''slowbeef:''' ''Faster than '''what'''? History?!''
685** Throughout the video, you can hear what sounds like the [=LPer=]'s computer ''roaring'', as if it's about to overheat running the emulator:
686-->'''Diabetus:''' Just listen to his computer. It's in pain.\
687...\
688'''Diabetus:''' Social Services is gonna take away this computer.\
689'''slowbeef:''' Social Services is gonna take away ''this kid''! What kind of parenting could lead to a video like this?!
690** slowbeef's complete disbelief that somebody actually made this. Also, the video was conspicuously cropped to show that the [=LPer=] is using a Mac, leading them to deduce that:
691-->'''Diabetus:''' Maybe this is the PC's new advertising campaign.\
692'''slowbeef:''' Yeah, this is the new Vista commercial, actually.
693** After Diabetus speculates what things would be like if the N64 actually ran at the speed of the video, the guys start coming up with hilarious slogans to "advertise" it.
694-->'''Diabetus:''' All right, we've got the best revolutionary graphics ever, and ''two'' megabytes of RAM.\
695'''slowbeef:''' These graphics are so good, you are going to see ''every goddamn frame of them.''\
696'''Dave_o:''' Experience ''blazing'' single-digit FPS.\
697'''slowbeef:''' We've got so many polygons we ''literally can't handle them.''
698** When the [=LPer=] reaches the boss of the level, he starts doing horrible voice acting for the dialogue, and then almost dies on the boss:
699-->'''slowbeef:''' Thanks. I'm glad you went with Cajun Retarded.\
700'''Dave_o:''' That's what I've always imagined this boss to sound like.\
701'''Diabetus:''' It sounds like he's covering his mouth with a rag and I just want to pour chloroform on it.\
702'''slowbeef:''' I wanna pour whatever they make a Molotov Cocktail with over it.\
703'''Diabetus:''' His Mac computer?\
704'''Dave_o:''' Given the temperature, it would immediately burst into flames.
705** As the player tries to fight the Whomp King...
706-->'''Dave_o:''' Showing this video with any pride is like saying, "Look, I can't cook an egg...really slowly."\
707'''Diabetus:''' Listen to the boss music! It sounds like the most impotent marching band ever created!
708** And when the Whomp King actually hits him...
709-->'''slowbeef:''' He got hit?! That's like being in Film/TheMatrix bullet time and ''still'' getting shot.
710** At the very end, the [=LPer=] finally starts to talk with some effort at emotion (or [[MotorMouth speed]])... when there's only about five seconds left.
711-->'''Diabetus:''' Can anyone understand a word this guy's saying, by the way?\
712'''slowbeef:''' Did his voice get faster now?\
713'''Diabetus:''' He's making up for the past ten minutes.\
714'''slowbeef:''' ''(laughs)'' It's like it was holding him back.\
715'''Dave_O:''' He's finally free of the horrible emulator.
716* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wnq6NP1psjQ LP Noire]]'' has Diabetus doing a film noir cop impression, until near the end when Jamboree music starts playing:
717-->'''Diabetus:''' ''Oh shit...''\
718''[door slams]''\
719'''Diabetus:''' ''[southern accent]'' Uh, the Hootenanny's not 'till next week! NEXT WEEK! *beat* YALL!
720** The very end:
721-->'''Diabetus:''' For now, I'm sleeping with one eye open, hoping Jake's dad, [=TonyHighSubsQuadrillion=], the city mayor, didn't have it out for us, if he catches wind that we talked over his son's Lets Play, he'd put us ''VideoGame/DeadToRights''.
722** The TakeThat to Franchise/MyLittlePony and Deviantart.
723-->'''Diabetus:''' And just like searching My Little Pony on Deviantart, I had to prepare for the worst. (Why did I do that anyway?)
724* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zs4hwKiKliM The LP Wars Begin]]'': the first encounter with [=Quadraxis14=], and easily the worst thing he's ever done.
725-->'''[=Quadraxis14=]:''' ''[bad Arnold impression]'' Get to the choppa!\
726'''slowbeef:''' '''SHUT THE FUCK UP! JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP!'''\
727...\
728'''[=Quadraxis14=]:''' It's all fun and games... until... an alien... race... comes and tries to destroy the whole world.\
729'''Diabetus:''' It's all fun and games... until... I become more... awkward.\
730'''slowbeef:''' It's all fun and games until I tell the longest punch line in the whole fuckin' world!
731[[/folder]]
732
733[[folder:Retsupuraes M-S]]
734* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=is96HGUJWWA MARIO COMBAT]]'' has slowbeef and [=@VoidBurger=] noticing the [=LPer=] being unable to get across lava, leading them to hope that the final boss is lava and he has some sort of thing about fire.
735** The entire game has the [=LPer=]'s cursor still on the screen.
736-->'''[=@VoidBurger=]:''' When's Mario going to attack that cursor on the screen?\
737'''slowbeef:''' ''[laughs]'' I thought that was ''mine'' for a second there!
738* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KZ9Vt1yVVko Mario Dies At The End]]'' has an [=LPer=] so bad at ''VideoGame/SuperMarioBros3'' that ''[[EpicFail he gets a Game Over on Stage 3 of World 1]]''. Then, [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KZ9Vt1yVVko&t=5m40s it abruptly ends]] with '''loud death metal music'''.
739-->'''slowbeef:''' Whoa!\
740'''Diabetus:''' Dude, holy shit! ''[both of them collapse into laughter]'' God ''damn!''\
741'''slowbeef:''' ''[struggling to breathe]'' Oh my god, that was awesome! What a fucking appropriate ending! ''Aw'', shit...\
742'''Diabetus:''' It's like watching your grandmother knit, and then 'HABLAHRAHBAHBLAH!'\
743'''slowbeef:''' ''[still laughing]'' [=BlackMetalGhost=], you're the fuckin' best. I think I'm actually gonna subscribe to you.\
744'''Diabetus:''' I hope he ends every video like that!\
745'''Slowbeef:''' I think we have to end every video like that.\
746'''Diabetus:''' Yeah. Yeah, we need some kind of in-your-face Retsupurae symbol with... Blood and horns and shit.\
747'''slowbeef:''' Game Over! DODODODODODODODO!
748* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z238775vMSg‎ Mario Kart FamCam]]'' is a extremely well-edited video utterly ruined by the fact that the [=LPers=] (two brothers and one sister) are ''extremely'' obnoxious.
749-->'''slowbeef:''' Two brothers and a sister. The 15-year old-\
750''[one of the [=LPers=] starts yelling loudly]''\
751'''slowbeef:''' - he's [[ShirtlessScene got his shirt off]] and he's screaming and twirling the Nunchuck.\
752'''[=ChipCheezum=]:''' And ''shirtless'', because, you know, that's just how he ''does'' ''VideoGame/MarioKartWii'', on Luigi Circuit.\
753''[After this, the [=LPers=] start singing [[ValuesDissonance "Ching chong, chi-cha-ching chong"]] over and over.]''\
754'''slowbeef:''' I'm thinking this really says to everyone, like, "Hey, we're all inbred, but we're good with video editing."
755* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_IuCoD-8MWA Mario, Party of One?]]'' is the most depressing ''VideoGame/MarioParty'' game ever.
756-->'''[=Joshey164=]:''' Wow, I'm actually not failing.\
757''[slowbeef and Diabetus laugh]''\
758'''slowbeef:''' My God, you need fucking Mario therapy.\
759''[[=Joshey164=] then fails the minigame]''\
760'''Diabetus:''' This calls for victory music!\
761'''slowbeef:''' ''[as [=Joshey164=]]'' No I failed, which was what I was expecting.\
762'''Diabetus:''' He didn't entirely suck, it's a victory for good!
763* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vVGFkA5zjso The Marios]]'': It seems like a pretty basic riff until the 6:52 mark - when the [=LPer=] actually ''mentions Retsupurae!''
764-->''[After their commentary is derailed, Slowbeef is the only one to continue ripping on the video]''\
765'''Proteus:''' You realize this is the second random video you've pulled out that's mentioned Retsupurae, right?\
766'''slowbeef:''' Yes, I...\
767'''Proteus:''' Like, in a row. Like-- seriously, you're-- you can't really-- you're becoming a Website/YouTube staple--\
768'''slowbeef:''' ''[cuts him off]'' I'm trying to talk and make fun of the video, will ya stop it?!\
769'''Proteus:''' No, ''fuck you''! Fuck you, you fuckin' Website/YouTube superstar, piece of shit!\
770'''Diabetus:''' ''[laughing]'' You take that back!\
771'''slowbeef:''' I got five thousand subscribers now, I could ''crush'' you! Who the hell are you?!\
772'''Diabetus:''' [=LuwiigiiMaster=] here said he liked our videos, so we can use his connections against you...\
773'''Proteus:''' ''[laughing]'' Oh, god.\
774'''Diabetus:''' Wake up the next morning, you won't be able to ''use your legs''!\
775'''slowbeef:''' I'm making a phone call-- LetsPlay/ProtonJon, kick this guy's ass!\
776'''Proteus:''' Oh, you gonna get LetsPlay/DeceasedCrab on me?\
777'''slowbeef:''' Yeah.\
778'''Proteus:''' Damn you, bitch... I'm gonna get calls at three in the morning-- "Hello, this is--" "[[CatchPhrase HUZZAH]]!!" "Nooo, stop calling me--" "HUZZAH!!!"\
779'''slowbeef:''' That is how he talks on the phone.\
780'''Proteus:''' It's all he says, all he ''can'' say.\
781'''Diabetus:''' Makes it really hard when he orders a pizza.\
782'''Proteus:''' "What would you like, sir--" "HUZZAHHHH!!"\
783'''Diabetus:''' "That is ''not'' one of our flavors." "[[GoshDarnItToHeck Dagnabbit]]!"
784* [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4jzmeBth3xQ Message from Dr. Light: [unintelligible garbled mess]:]] Pretty much the whole video.
785** slowbeef and Diabetus' jokes about the constant humming throughout the video.
786** They discuss his name briefly:
787-->'''slowbeef:''' Oh, his name's Gamer Mike, even though his username is gamermik. Are you disparaging the Irish, Mike?
788** Them referencing the window reflecting off of the TV.
789-->'''Diabetus:''' As you can see, Aqua Man is looking in on Mega Man through the window up there. Watching his progress.
790* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-60o5nEhmSM Mega Monga X]]'': The video starts out with clips of other video games while "Dr. Wily's Castle 1" theme from ''VideoGame/MegaMan2'' plays, which leaves Slowbeef speechless.
791-->'''Diabetus:''' Maybe if we show enough games, we'll get the soundtrack ''right''.
792** Slowbeef and Diabetus also spend the video in a stereotypical fanboy voice, mocking the [=LPer=] and his constant talk about how he got his information from manga... before temporarily devolving into HypocriticalHumor when they point out that he shouldn't be playing Flame Mammoth's stage second.
793** When the [=LPer=] reaches Flame Mammoth, he spends the first life constantly clinging to the wall ("Are the next five minutes of this LP of him just hiding in the corner?"), the second has his failing to even attempt to dodge. Then the [=LPer=] proceeds to use SaveScumming to try to beat Flame Mammoth... which he doesn't need.
794-->'''[=THEBrandonBrownson=]:''' Suck my-stave sate? Save state.\
795'''slowbeef:''' "Suck your stave state", really? That's your taunt?\
796'''Psychedelic Eyeball:''' ''(chuckle)'' '''Suck on my cheating, you asshole!'''\
797'''slowbeef:''' I love that, like, "kiss my ass, I only died twice and savestated. I'm the best!"\
798'''Diabetus:''' Don't treat this as a one-sided victory for him.
799** The payoff to having to suffer through the ineptitude of the Let's Player: obtaining a measly Heart Upgrade. And then, similar to [=BlackMetalGhost=], him having a ridiculously loud and out-of-place end-title card, involving gunshots and police sirens.
800-->'''[=THEBrandonBrownson=]:''' ''[As he gets the upgrade]'' [[PunctuatedForEmphasis Fuck. Yes.]]\
801'''slowbeef:''' ''[Stammering]'' Did that two little meters of heart really deserve a "Fuck Yes"?\
802'''Diabetus:''' Fuck yes.\
803'''Psychedelic Eyeball:''' I just bought milk. Fuck yes.\
804'''Diabetus:''' Do you guys have the Escape Unit ready for us?\
805'''slowbeef:''' Still at zero lives, fuck yes. ''(some chuckles)'' I'm still terrible at ''Mega Man'' and Let's Play, fuck yes.\
806'''Psychedelic Eyeball:''' The video ended, fu-''(the end-title card comes, and the trio start screaming as if they're really being shot at) Oh my God he's trying to kill me! (he and Diabetus scream for a bit more) I'M UNDER THE COUCH! IT'S AN EMERGENCY!''\
807'''Diabetus:''' I'm hit! Shit!\
808'''Psychedelic Eyeball:''' Oh my God, we've been busted!
809* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JwecaZpd2vM Move Over, Unregistered Hypercam 2!]]'' is an uneventful ''VideoGame/PokemonDiamondAndPearl'' LP recorded using [=EZVid=], complete with minimalist repetitive "western" music replacing the game's sound. By the end, the two are discussing using it as their standard background music for Retsupuraes. Then the death metal stinger from ''Mario Dies At The End'' returns.
810** Most RP videos can hope to get a comment from the original Let's Player. This one got a comment from the Let's Player ''and'' the [=EZVid=] corporate channel.
811-->'''ezvidinc''': If you are baked, [=EZVid=] will automatically end your video at 4:20 minutes. As a safety precaution.
812* [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jl7jAQsjpuc Note: The Spread Gun Should Not Spread Your Video to Half an Hour]] has another hilariously incompetent [=LPer=]; this one takes ''half an hour'' to get through the first level of ''{{VideoGame/Contra}}''.
813-->'''slowbeef:''' Alright, so this is his favorite game of all time, but I just wanna give you the title and length, okay?\
814'''Diabetus:''' Alright.\
815'''slowbeef:''' Thirty minutes, thirty-two seconds. Title: ''Contra'' NES... '''''The First Level'''''.\
816'''Diabetus:''' [[ThisIsGonnaSuck ...How long would you say the first level normally takes?]]\
817'''slowbeef:''' ''Three'' minutes? ''Tops?''
818** Part way through, the [=LPer=] starts doing movie references. The two take it and run with it, especially when they do [[Film/TheDarkKnightRises Bane]].
819* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P9G-JAqOoyE No Tyler, That's Retsupurae. (Monster in my Pocket by ActionBastard and Tyler)]]'', featuring poor Tyler, [=ActionBastardAway=]'s guest who never gets a word in edgewise.
820** Tyler also endures an incredible amount of [[TheWoobie verbal abuse]] from the fittingly named [=ActionBastardAway=], as shown below:
821-->''[Tyler is ducking down in the leftmost corner, attacking, while [=ActionBastardAway=] tries to go right]''\
822'''[=ActionBastardAway=]''': Can you please go, Tyler?\
823''[slowbeef and Proteus laugh]''\
824'''Proteus:''' Goddamn you, Tyler!\
825'''slowbeef:''' Jesus!\
826'''Proteus:''' You're such a ''dick!''\
827''[Tyler dies from an enemy coming from the left]''\
828'''[=ActionBastardAway=]''': You could have just turned around and ''hit him.''\
829'''Proteus:''' Yeah Tyler, you retard.\
830'''[=ActionBastardAway=]''': It's not my fault [[{{Jerkass}} you're too stupid to hit the dude.]]\
831''[slowbeef and Proteus laugh again]''\
832'''[=ActionBastardAway=]''': [[ItsAllAboutMe You shouldn't have let me die]] [[{{Jerkass}} because you're being a little petty douchebag.]]\
833''[slowbeef and Proteus lose it]''\
834'''slowbeef:''' ''Holy '''f.'''''\
835...\
836''[[=ActionBastardAway=] exploits a strategy to kill a miniboss by attacking him as soon as he appears]''\
837'''Tyler:''' ''(very faintly)'' Oh, that's cheat[ing].\
838'''Proteus:''' Is he even going to explain who this guy ''is'', or what his attack patterns are, or what he's doing, or... ''anything?''\
839'''[=ActionBastardAway=]''': No, Tyler, that's skill.\
840''[slowbeef and Proteus lose it yet again]''\
841'''Proteus:''' Yeah, Tyler. What the fuck?
842** Then there's the very beginning of the video:
843-->'''[=ActionBastardAway=]''': Hey everybody, we're gonna make a save state...\
844'''Proteus:''' [enthusiastically] Hey everybody, we're gonna make a save state!\
845'''slowbeef:''' Yay!... Let's Play Emulators!
846* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VyQ5NHNrPeY Pinball Wizards' Growing Pains]]'': It's 37 minutes of LetsPlay/BillyMC and [=TheLimePopsicle=] playing ''Pinball'' for the NES. The fact that, after almost 40 minutes, slowbeef and Diabetus pretty much run out of things to say, ''and [=BillyMC=] and [=TheLimePopsicle=] don't'' is absolutely hilarious. Especially after the final time they play it, and they keep talking about ''Series/GrowingPains'' and other 80's sitcoms for about ''three minutes'' after the game's over.
847-->'''[=BillyMC=]:''' [=TheLimePopsicle=] here is getting hot, though.\
848''[slowbeef and Diabetus lose it]''\
849'''Diabetus:''' Things are heating up!\
850'''slowbeef''' [in hysteria]: '''''He's getting hot!!!'''''\
851'''[=BillyMC=]:''' It's only gonna get hotter!\
852''[slowbeef claps in his laughter]''\
853'''Diabetus:''' Pinball operates by ''VideoGame/NBAJam'' rules.\
854''[slowbeef almost chokes with laughter and Diabetus chuckles again]''\
855'''[=TheLimePopsicle=]:''' I love sitcoms like ''Series/GrowingPains'' and ''Series/TheWonderYears''...\
856'''Diabetus:''' Why are you talking about 80's sitcoms?\
857'''slowbeef''' [still cracking up]: Oh my god, I'm gonna throw up!\
858...\
859'''[=TheLimePopsicle=]:''' I never watched [[Series/FamilyMatters it]] near the end.\
860'''[=BillyMC=]:''' Yeah, and I DON'T BLAME YOU!\
861'''Diabetus:''' Woah! Pop culture passion!\
862'''slowbeef:''' "I don't blame you, motherfucker!"\
863'''Diabetus:''' "You are fucking ''on'', bro!"\
864'''slowbeef:''' "Yeah!"\
865'''[=TheLimePopsicle=]:''' But yeah, I can't believe she has feelings for Steve--\
866'''[=BillyMC=]:''' Yeah, THAT'S NOT WHAT WE WANNA SEE! WE DON'T WANNA--\
867'''Diabetus:''' Somebody touched on a nerve.\
868'''[=TheLimePopsicle=]:''' That would be like Malorie getting feelings for Skippy in ''Series/FamilyTies''.\
869'''slowbeef:''' ''[[BigWhat What!?]]''\
870''[slowbeef and Diabetus crack up]''\
871'''Diabetus:''' Alright, [[SarcasmFailure fuck our commentary]]. Let's just listen to them.
872* [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cb-tgLUABxA Pokemon LP Evolved Into... ...Oh wow.]] Most of it has them interpreting the player as having multiple personalities, culminating in a callback to ''Dark Seed II''.
873* The duo watch a review of ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MH-Y53QWZ0w Policenauts,]]'' with a introduction of "[=GameMaster=]" wearing a leather jacket and gloves for the review.
874* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2HxzjFX2AOk Problem: Skyrim is not sexy enough. Solution: Kill yourse- I mean, make a mod.]]'' After the "Better Females" mod, it cuts to seemingly random close-up of a lady with absolutely colossal breasts. Their reaction is priceless.
875** Slowbeef saying that the "Better Females" mod would probably burn a feminist alive just by seeing it and then apologizing for the video's content.
876-->'''Diabetus''': Even the lady looks like she's ashamed of this.
877** One demonstration showed what looked to be a heavily-clothed flat-chested woman with WolverineClaws stabbing a huge-breasted, nearly naked woman in the neck.
878-->'''slowbeef''': This is the most horrible snuff film I've ever seen.
879* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E3kdmLi9RVg Protip from Retsupurae: Do Not Take Phone Calls During Let's Play Mega Man X]]'': This is [=BurningHunter=]'s LP of VideoGame/MegaManX. After several minutes of enduring his laughable attempts at defeating Bospider (including his inability to realize where Bospider can actually go and an apparent refusal to use weapons or even ''[[CherryTapping charge his buster]]'' to fight it), Slowbeef and Diabetus go from stunned disbelief to utter rage when the [=LPer=] pauses the game to take a phone call ''and [[LeaveTheCameraRunning doesn't edit the resulting footage]].''
880-->'''slowbeef:''' ''[livid]'' How '''stupid''' do you have to '''be''' not to '''''edit this'''''? Who wants to hear your phone call? ''They don't even hear the '''other side of the call'''''!
881** [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9aTPf1fGGhs Three videos later,]] he defeats Bospider by [[{{Scrub}} throwing a hadoken,]] then [[NoFairCheating claiming supremacy]].
882* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vms1rY9gmZw A Public Service Announcement for Let's Players]]'' (aka "Please stop Let's Playing ''VideoGame/IWannaBeTheGuy''.")
883-->"[[Literature/AmericanGods You could see the lines of his skull. Tell you what, though]]-- Please stop Let's Playing ''I Wanna Be The Guy''."\
884"Shadow's list got shorter and shorter. After two years-- please stop Let's Playing ''I Wanna Be The Guy''."\
885"Second, he was going to towel himself-- Please stop Let's Playing ''I Wanna Be The Guy''."\
886"Please stop Let's Playing ''I Wanna Be Th''--" ''[game crashes]'' "Thank you, '''God'''. [[SugarWiki/MomentOfAwesome It stopped]] '''[[SugarWiki/MomentOfAwesome you]]'''. Look at that! Look at that, you dumb shit! The game doesn't even want you doing this!" ''[[=ZoopSoul=] says with resignation, "Well, that ends that."]'' "Thank God."
887* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T6aPL0Id-_g Rant Hero]]'': Just the fact that this guy is pissed the hell off over the fact that you can't play Guitar Hero on the Wii with the controller (when it's called GUITAR Hero for a reason) is funny on its own, but slowbeef and Diabetus make it even better.
888* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xAMlb7geKV8 Retsupurae Battletoads with Voice and Subtitles For No Good Reason!]]''. Goldskarr's [[WhatTheHellIsThatAccent incomprehensible accent]] and [[TheUnintelligible slurred speech]], the loud noises in the background, his bizarre commentary (with subtitles that don't have anything to do with anything) that abruptly switches to post-commentary, and his lack of skill make this one a ''motherlode'' of comedy. It's bad enough to make [[DeadpanSnarker Diabetus]] laugh out loud, and slowbeef spends several minutes in hysterics.
889-->'''Goldskarr:''' Actually, I remember playing this on the Super 'Tendo...\
890'''Diabetus:''' ...The Super ''Tendo''?\
891'''slowbeef:''' What the hell accent is that?\
892'''Diabetus:''' Uh, a drunk British person trying to sound American?\
893'''slowbeef:''' Sounds to me like an American who burned his tongue on soup trying to sound British.\
894'''Diabetus:''' Maybe it's a combination of both.\
895'''Goldskarr:''' So I just saw a trailer for ''VideoGame/DukeNukemForever''...\
896'''slowbeef:''' What?\
897'''Diabetus:''' Dook Nookum Fowevah.\
898'''slowbeef:''' What does that have to-\
899'''Goldskarr:''' Still no gameplay footage as of yet.\
900'''Subtitle:''' considering it's been almost 10 years...and still no gameplay footage?!\
901'''slowbeef:''' What th-- Is he making fun of ''VideoGame/DukeNukemForever'' in subtitle and voice format ''in a VideoGame/{{Battletoads}} LP?'' ...I hope?\
902'''Diabetus:''' I think a poltergeist possessed his [=YouTube=] video or something.\
903...\
904''[A dog is heard barking in the background.]''\
905'''slowbeef:''' Is his dog pissed at him now?\
906'''Goldskarr:''' BAD DOG, SHUT UP!\
907'''Diabetus:''' Maybe the dog wrote the subtitles.\
908...\
909'''Goldskarr:''' [[MakesJustAsMuchSenseInContext I apologize for all the drug addicts.]]\
910'''slowbeef:''' I apologize for all the ''drug addicts''?\
911'''Diabetus:''' Is he raising social awareness on complicated issues, or what?\
912...\
913'''Goldskarr:''' I don't even think we're halfway done yet.\
914'''slowbeef:''' I think-- Is he almost done?\
915'''Diabetus:''' You're going through-\
916''[The footage suddenly pauses]''\
917'''slowbeef:''' Wai-- What is he doing?\
918'''Goldskarr:''' What the hell is going on?\
919'''Diabetus:''' You paused the game.\
920'''Goldskarr:''' I think I must have paused here.\
921'''Diabetus:''' You paused the game!\
922'''slowbeef:''' ''[laughing]'' "I think I paused it!"\
923''[A phone rings in the background; Diabetus and slowbeef crack up]''\
924'''Diabetus:''' Now his dog's calling him?!
925* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yeYSmWCwtjc Retsupurae "Let's Play Chaz Edition" (Wizardry V) (OOPS!)]]'': The guys take the game's "Oops!" error message and run with it.
926-->'''slowbeef:''' Cast "Make a good Website/YouTube video." OOPS!\
927'''Diabetus:''' I decide to Let's Play Wizardry V. OOPS!\
928'''slowbeef:''' Succeed at life. OOPS!
929** "HE LOADED STATE!"
930* [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w-KjrGPas3Q Retsupurae Let's Play Twitch Plays Pokemon]], an amazing video of a person who took footage of ''WebVideo/TwitchPlaysPokemon'', slapped on the [=PokeRap=] and called it a Let's Play, leaving Diabetus and slowbeef utterly confused.
931* [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0ko81N-i8Gk Retsupurae Mega Man X (Diabetus Solo RP)]]: Another [=LPer=] tackles the first stage of Sigma's base in ''VideoGame/MegaManX'', this time nasally doing voice acting during the cutscenes while heavily breathing through his microphone.
932** Two golden moments happen during the fight with Vile:
933-->'''[=Daft23=]:''' ''[Singing as Zero busts out and attacks Vile]'' Super Mega Death Beam of Ultimateness! [[WebVideo/AvatarTheAbridgedSeries Kung Fu Action Jesus!]]\
934'''Diabetus:''' ...you're fucking joking, right?\
935'''[=Daft23=]''': Sha-Bang!\
936'''Diabetus''': ''Right?''\
937''[...]''
938-->'''Diabetus:''' Well, there is a bright side to this: looking at his actual video, he's had 51 views since he first posted it on February 6th. So, this proves he has no friends in real life ''or'' the Internet.\
939'''[=Daft23=]:''' ''[through perfect timing]'' I actually don't...\
940'''Diabetus''': Congratulations, buddy.
941* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e9VNXsPRvTo Retsupurae Link to the Past... Some Frames Dropped; You Can Barely Notice It]]'': The [=LPer=] spends a little more than one minute explaining his computer setup and technical difficulties without even playing. And when he does start to play, the framerate barely goes above ''two frames per second''.
942-->'''slowbeef''': Wait, wait, wait, he said it desynched this? It desynched ''this?'' This effin' ''slideshow? This is the framerate you got? '''On Link To the Past?''''' What the ''fuck'', kid, you running this on a vacuum tube computer?
943** Toward the end,
944-->'''[=LPer=]:''' Am I even recording?\
945''[slowbeef and Diabetus crack up]''\
946'''slowbeef:''' No, you're not recording!\
947'''[=LPer=]:''' It would suck if I wasn't.\
948''[slowbeef and Diabetus burst into laughter again]''\
949'''Diabetus:''' Actually, it would be like a gift from heaven!\
950'''slowbeef:''' Yeah, it would actually not suck!\
951'''[=LPer=]:''' Now to whack the crap out of [[MiniBoss that dude]]. I can't remember if I beat him or not.\
952''[slowbeef and Diabetus erupt into hysterics]''\
953'''slowbeef:''' You can't remember?!\
954''[The [=LPer=] pauses the game again]''\
955'''slowbeef:''' Stop pausing! You were-what the fuck!\
956'''[=LPer=]:''' Oh yeah, this is where I got interrupted...by my sister.\
957''[slowbeef and Diabetus howl with laughter]''\
958'''Diabetus:''' His sister came in, "Let me show you how to do this".\
959'''slowbeef:''' This is where my sister started playing for me... And told me to give her back her underwear which I was wearing.\
960''[Diabetus cracks up again]''\
961...\
962''[Later slowbeef grows tired of the [=LPer=] narrating everything he's doing or is about to do.]''\
963'''slowbeef:''' It's like Link's very slow, stupid, biography!\
964''[Diabetus lets out a very goofy chuckle]''\
965\
966'''Diabetus:''' What's he doing?\
967'''slowbeef:''' Tryin' to have sex with Zelda.\
968''[The [=LPer=] remarks that he's trying to play a game of grab-ass with Zelda.]''\
969'''slowbeef:''' OH MY GOD, he was!\
970''[The [=LPer=] runs around again, trying to mess around with Zelda.]''\
971'''Diabetus:''' Oh, what, it took so long to make the 16-bit sex look convincing?\
972'''slowbeef:''' I can't watch this.\
973''[The two continue to sputter out {{Angrish}} for a few seconds.]''\
974'''slowbeef:''' Did he think this was really funny?\
975''[[=LPer=] laughs]''\
976'''slowbeef:''' I guess so!
977
978-->''[Then the videos ends abruptly.]''\
979'''Diabetus:''' Maybe he was like--\
980'''slowbeef:''' ''(unconformed interrupting Diabetus)'' HE JUST CUT OFF!! DID YOU HEAR THAT, HE JUST CUT OFF! It was "and at that point" and that was it!\
981''[Diabetus can be heard giggling.]''
982* [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WbidLjTpIr8 Retsupurae Sonic the camcorder hog]] offers some uproarious laughing reactions from the trio of slowbeef, Diabetus, and Proteus -- provided you avoid motion sickness from the shoddy camcorder work or abject horror at the camcorder operator's close-up near the end.
983-->'''pikminpanic''': I'M A NEWS REPORTER!!
984* [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ocZaGgtMVVg Retsupurae Strider - Strider is not a Wrestler, But We'll Talk Wrestling]], a riff of a low quality NES ''{{VideoGame/Strider}}'' LP (complete with Unregistered Hypercam 2) by someone who also happens to upload wrestling clips.
985** The way they mock how the [=LPer=] says "China" at the beginning, followed by this exchange:
986-->'''slowbeef:''' We're going back to China, and the title of the video is "Turning... Chinese?" You're not, you're going to China. What... horrible joke is that?\
987'''Diabetus:''' He just has this weird fetish.\
988'''slowbeef:''' (to the [=LPer=]) ...jackass.\
989'''[=LJ877574=]:''' (to an enemy in-game) ...asshole.\
990'''Diabetus:''' Is he talking back?\
991'''slowbeef:''' I guess so.\
992'''Dave_o:''' Let's kick his ass!\
993'''slowbeef:''' Jesus...\
994'''Diabetus:''' Let's do it... I don't know, this guy knows wrestling.
995** Dave_o's reaction to one of the boss fights.
996--> '''Dave_o:''' Wait, you have that cool ass background, and your boss fight is a box?!
997* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLCE2A909BB8FD7CA0&feature=plcp Retsusturimu]]'', the first Retsupurae livestream, recovered by a fan. Includes such highlights as:
998** [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xBgVVxgxaH0 A Mega Man 10 LP]], with a surprise at the end.
999** [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X4L7GquHY7k Super Mario Supernova]], the worst possible ''VideoGame/SuperMarioGalaxy'' LP you could get.
1000-->'''slowbeef''': This TV is somehow plugged into a fish.
1001** [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KU7kuU2mATQ Heavy]] [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O0D29PiJ7J0 Rain]], which gets derailed into the duo riffing on the game rather than the [=LPer=].
1002** [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hevx_EjeM5M&feature=channel&list=UL BillyMC's]] ''VideoGame/SuperMarioBros3'' [=LP=] with [=Kenbombguy1=], where the audio synch becomes worse as the video progresses. Also:
1003--> '''[=BillyMC=]:''' These Boos are relentless, that's for sure.
1004* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m4ZXY1Taav8 Serious Dad]]'' is a goldmine of comedy.
1005** First off, fifteen seconds in a child passes by the camera (while his dad [=LPs=] a ''VideoGame/SeriousSam'' game) and continues to cameo throughout the video, and at one point the [=LPer=] shows him how to play the (very bloody and inappropriate) game. slowbeef and [=ChipCheezum=] run with this for most of the video.
1006--> ''[the child runs past the camcorder for the third time]''\
1007'''[=ChipCheezum=]:''' Is this kid just, like, walking in circles around his dad's chair?\
1008'''slowbeef:''' ''[chuckling]'' I think so.\
1009''[the child runs by in the same direction again]''\
1010'''slowbeef:''' Appare -\
1011'''[=ChipCheezum=]:''' ''He is!''\
1012''[slowbeef loses it]''\
1013'''[=ChipCheezum=]:''' He's havin' a blast!
1014** The other part comes from the [=LPer=] showing the viewers his capture card, which baffles the [=RPers=].
1015-->'''[=ChipCheezum=]:''' You know, capture cards aren't just magical lenses you put over camcorders.
1016* [[http://blip.tv/slowbeef/rpg-maker-7-to-terror-no-sorry-7-my-bad-6526003 RPG Maker: +7 TO TERROR... no sorry, -7, my bad]] riffs an awful [=PewDiePie=] wannabe playing ''VideoGame/AoOni''.
1017-->'''slowbeef:''' Oh man, I can't believe he's being chased by...the fuck ''is'' that, a ''Series/SesameStreet'' character?\
1018'''Diabetus:''' Some kind of Easter Island abomination?\
1019'''slowbeef:''' Let's just paste one of the developers heads on top of this horrible sprite. Also, I'm using 'developers' loosely. Yeah, just keep circling, this is a great strategy.\
1020'''Diabetus:''' So, this is a demo for that ''Franchise/ResidentEvil'' reboot they've been talking about.\
1021'''slowbeef:''' ''Resident Evil 7: We Gave Up''. Oh man, listen to that music, it's so...appropriate?\
1022'''Diabetus:''' ''Resident Evil 7: Is This Scary? We've Forgotten What It Means.''
1023* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6Ue-DmQGLRs Skyrim's Enigma Mod]]''. The [=LPer=] cranks up Website/YouTube's stabilization option all the way, combined with his tendency to spin the mouse around for minutes at a time resulting in a very shaky video. Leading to multiple references to ''Series/{{The Office|US}}''.
1024* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xt2uyDqbA-Q SNES9X]]'':
1025-->"Shut up! [[VerbalTic SNES9X]]. There's, [=SNES9X=], there are no viewers, no-one watched, [=SNES9X=], no-one watched this video to the, [=SNES9X=], to the end except me. It is seriously a horrible video, [=Quadraxis14=]. [=SNES9X=]. There is no skill in [=SNES9X=], in replaying the same thing over an-[=SNES9X=], and reloading savestates ov-[=SNES9X=], over and over again. A monkey could do, [=SNES9X=], a monkey could do this. A kid could do this. It doesn't matter. I don't know why you did this. I, [=SNES9X=], I don't know what the point of this video is. [=SNES9X=]. I don't know why you're doing it, [=SNES9X=], er, [=SNES9X=]. It will not make you, [=SNES9X=], popular at school. It will not get you, [=SNES9X=], girls or anything. It's a waste of time, [=SNES9X=]."
1026** As well as the fact that Slowbeef, while reading, gets more and more aggravated over [=Quadraxis14=]'s save states and irritating commentary, culminating in relief when the Let's Play finally cuts off.
1027** And in the original ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GyBBIm3CwjM What emulator was this again?]]'', there's the reaction to two of the series' thumbnail images being the [=SNES9X=] screen. "Well, the law of averages, it had to happen in one of them."
1028** An [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tskLGO4GU0E edited version]], cutting out the VerbalTic, received this comment:
1029--> I imagine an honor student reading this in front of the school for his graduation speech while one drunk jackass in the audience keeps moaning and interrupting like an asshole, making him stutter a couple times. Then he snaps and rants at him, then goes right back to the speech. This is very well done! Also, [=SNES9X=]
1030* [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rMNRKz07uf4 So there's that]]: the final video of Retsublitz which shows a ROM hack of VideoGame/FireEmblem made by the same guy from "Pokemon LP Evolved Into... ...Oh wow". Here he [[SelfInsert put himself into the game]]. The crux of this happens at 5:45, when his character Raymond, to support the character Linoan, confesses his feelings for her and ''she accepts''. Slowbeef admitted that his wife said she could not watch it anymore after that part.
1031** At the end of the video, slowbeef and Diabetus give out their thanks, but Diabetus says that he doesn't know of anyone who to thank -- then it quickly cuts out with an addition from him ''remembering'' those he wanted to thank!
1032** The side-hug at the end of the video is what makes it really hilarious.
1033* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A_ZjfE--AXU SpongeBob Does A Let's Play (if SpongeBob were from Hell)]]'': The very fact that slowbeef can't go more that a couple of seconds without muting the let's player's grating voice.
1034--> '''slowbeef:''' That's what I think of you, [=ISneakSometimes=].\
1035'''[=VoidBurger=]:''' How can he possibly sneak sometimes with a voice like that? He sneaks never.
1036* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OC1SzVR5zeo Super Bummerman 2]]'', where slowbeef and Diabetus meet [[DumbMuscle Musclebomber2021]]:
1037--> '''[=Musclebomber2021=]:''' You see those red things right down there that look like time bombs?\
1038'''slowbeef:''' What are they?\
1039'''[=Musclebomber2021=]:''' Well yeah, [[CaptainObvious those are time bombs]].\
1040'''Diabetus:''' Thank you.\
1041'''slowbeef:''' How descriptive.\
1042'''Diabetus:''' "You see this game that has Super Bomberman 2 written on the cover? Well it's Super Bomberman 2!"\
1043...\
1044'''[=Musclebomber2021=]:''' Oh yes, here are my favorite sets of enemies: The Triple Fudge Packers.\
1045'''slowbeef:''' The ''what?''\
1046'''[=Musclebomber2021=]:''' Beware! These guys will blow themselves up like bombs and kill you before you can kill them.\
1047'''Diabetus:''' ''[with exaggerated perplexion]'' Just like a fudge packer.\
1048'''slowbeef:''' A TRIPLE fudge packer.\
1049'''[=Musclebomber2021=]:''' Watch out for the triple fudge packers.\
1050'''Diabetus:''' It sounds like a Baskin Robbins flavor.\
1051...\
1052'''[=Musclebomber2021=]:''' ''[No enemies are onscreen]'' Now that I've made my way to the triple fudge packers...\
1053'''Diabetus:''' Is he trying to turn that into a CatchPhrase?\
1054'''[=Musclebomber2021=]:''' ...and avoid the triple fudge packers...\
1055'''slowbeef:''' WHAT TRIPLE FUDGE PACKERS!? Is he talking about the fucking Packers, like the football team? What the hell is going on?\
1056'''Diabetus:''' "The Green Bay Triple Fudge Packers!"
1057* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZRmZ7QxPYYI Super Mario Mild Irritation]]'':
1058** Four minutes into the video, Dave_o nonchalantly asks: "Is this guy surprised that he's frustrated? I mean...It's ''called'' 'Frustration'. ... That's like having a Rubik's cube and being 'why the fuck is this thing so square?'"
1059** The LP'er audibly cracks open a can of "Dew" leading to this conversation:
1060-->'''slowbeef:''' He's opening a can of Mountain Dew?\
1061'''Dave_o:''' Yeah, man.\
1062'''Diabetus:''' Shit's really gettin' real now.\
1063'''Dave_o:''' "Man, I've had a rough day at work, let me open some ''Dew''." *''K-CHHHH''*\
1064'''slowbeef:''' ''*laughing*'' I think it's product placement! I think Mountain Dew paid him for this.\
1065'''Dave_o:''' That's why it has so many ratings that are good, it's viral marketing!\
1066'''Diabetus:''' "All this frustation gave me an empty stomach. Good thing I have my '''''CHEETOS'''''."\
1067'''slowbeef:''' "Oh man, good thing my sister uses Kotex tampons!"\
1068'''Diabetus:''' "Otherwise this game would be ''really'' frustrating!"\
1069'''Dave_o:''' "She'd be a ''real'' bitch! I'd be so frustrated."
1070** Diabetus feigning suspicion at the LP'ers exaggerated reaction to the game which leads to the trio wondering how he would react to common occurrences:
1071-->'''Dave_o:''' It takes him, like, four hours to tie his shoes.\
1072'''Diabetus:''' IT's ''MAY-HAM!!!!''\
1073'''LP'er:''' '''''NOOOOOOOOUUGGHHH....'''''\
1074'''Dave_o:''' And he makes similar noises while he's tying his shoes, he's like: "NOOOOOO!"\
1075'''slowbeef:''' ''*laughs*'' "THIS IS HORSE SHIT!!!"\
1076'''Diabetus:''' He mis-ties one knot: "'''''UUUUUUUUUUUUURRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!'''''"\
1077'''slowbeef:''' "I can't believe it, what is this?!"\
1078'''Diabetus:''' "''WHAT THE FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-HH!!!''"
1079** Dave_o and slowbeef question why anybody would willingly make a video like this which leads to Dave_o proposing the following situation:
1080-->'''Dave_o:''' [I]f he's, like, gettin' mugged, um, dudes are like: "Man, give me all your money!", and he's like: "Do you know who you're talking to?", and they're like: "What?", and he's like: "I beat Super Mario Frustration", and they just ''flee''.\
1081'''Diabetus:''' Screaming.\
1082'''slowbeef:''' The gun they're holding starts shaking a little first, then they drop it and run.
1083** As the LP'er reloads state over and over again near the end:
1084-->'''Dave_o:''' I really love this three seconds of music a lot.\
1085'''slowbeef:''' ''*laughs*''\
1086'''Diabetus:''' We should try, like, savestating our commentary. We should try, like, savestating our commentary.\
1087'''slowbeef:''' We should try savestating our commentary, you said?\
1088'''Diabetus:''' -ting our commentary-ting our commentary-ting our commentary.
1089* [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SRFWYpuQHt8 Sword of Vermillion]] starts off innocently enough with what looks like a camcorder Let's Play of said game, but then, the gameplay is replaced by recorded footage of the let's player ''pretending to be in the game''. The reactions to this are priceless.
1090-->'''Diabetus:''' So earlier you said that this game was the Genesis' answer to ''VideoGame/TheLegendOfZeldaI''. I say that this video is the human answer to the Genesis.\
1091'''slowbeef:''' I think this video is why Sega stopped making consoles.\
1092...\
1093'''Diabetus:''' Imagine being the cameraman for this. How would you feel?\
1094'''slowbeef:''' BoundAndGagged?
1095** slowbeef's reactions to the video, which start out confused and become increasingly horrified.
1096---> '''slowbeef:''' Oh God... ''what is this?'' Oh, this is shameful. This is so- '''Oh good God'''.
1097[[/folder]]
1098
1099[[folder:Retsupuraes T-Z]]
1100* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w5NzzCrqdX4 That's]]'' ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W5-Gvi4DMW0&feature=channel&list=UL so]]'' ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HhLOFqn6Idc&feature=relmfu Kaizo!]]'': slowbeef and Diabetus have a blast tearing apart Kaizo Mario 64 by [=OmegaEdge29=], a "romhacker" who is more content to add [[FakeDifficulty a bunch of Chain Chomps and flamethrowers]] to the game rather than change any of the level design.
1101-->'''Diabetus:''' "Alright, I see a Chain Chomp. Control+C. Control+V here, Control+V here..."\
1102'''slowbeef:''' "Oh wait, wait, wait, Control+Z. That one was a little too close to the tree. Alright, Control+V."\
1103...\
1104'''slowbeef:''' Is Kaizo now just an internet adjective for anything that's mildly irritating?\
1105'''Diabetus:''' I had a bad Kaizo flight delay a couple weeks ago. It was ridiculous! Would you stop hacking my pilot please?\
1106'''slowbeef:''' I wish someone would stop hacking this doctor's office waiting room, it's too Kaizo!\
1107'''Diabetus:''' Is my tumor benign, or is it Kaizo, doctor?\
1108...\
1109'''[=OmegaEdge29=]:''' "Hey Mario! Is it true that you, blah blah blah..."\
1110'''Diabetus:''' "Hey Mario, is it true that you're in a shitty romhack?"\
1111'''slowbeef:''' "Hey Mario, is it true that you only changed, like, 10% of the text tops?"\
1112'''Diabetus:''' "Hey Mario, where did all these Chain Chomps come from?"\
1113''[[=OmegaEdge29=] takes a teleport shortcut]''\
1114'''slowbeef:''' "Hey Mario, are you actually going to CHEAT a little in your own terribly difficult romhack?" ''Are you joking!?''\
1115...\
1116'''slowbeef:''' Did he not change anything here, or am I wrong?\
1117'''Diabetus:''' Uhhh, [[CaptainObvious Chain Chomp, that's different, uh, there's that electric thing, the fire]], uh...\
1118'''slowbeef:''' How Kaizo of him.\
1119'''Diabetus:''' [[TitleDrop That's so Kaizo.]] ''[cracking up]'' I think that red coin is in a slightly different place. He might have moved it a few inches up for no reason.\
1120'''slowbeef:''' "Four pixels to the left makes this the ultimate in Kaizoness!"\
1121'''Diabetus:''' He [[EvilLaugh laughs maniacally]] to himself when he moves it.\
1122''[[=OmegaEdge29=] accidentally enters a cannon]''\
1123'''Diabetus:''' Oh, if you actually use the cannon in the race you lose, so he fucked up.\
1124'''slowbeef:''' Oh yeah? Well maybe he romhacked it out!\
1125'''Diabetus:''' Oh god! He's thought of every angle!\
1126'''slowbeef:''' The Chain Chomp is gonna come in and just eat the turtle.\
1127'''Diabetus:''' The turtle can't get up the hill because it's too hard.\
1128'''slowbeef:''' No, because he screwed up the romhack!\
1129'''Diabetus:''' The geometry makes it literally impossible for Koopa the Quick to make it to the end.\
1130'''slowbeef:''' "Oh no, I knew I added too many Chain Chomps! Now the game's broken!"\
1131...\
1132'''slowbeef:''' I wish a Chain Chomp would have eaten him out of the air. ''(a Chain Chomp then attacks Mario as the level fades out)'' Oh well, good enough.\
1133'''Diabetus:''' Couldn't you feasibly hack a Chain Chomp into the sky by putting invisible platforms in the air?\
1134'''slowbeef:''' Well, I mean, yeah. I think people who probably clicked the "Advanced" tab of whatever tool he used could do it, but he cannot.\
1135...\
1136'''Diabetus:''' When he played ''VideoGame/SuperMarioGalaxy'', do you think [[PerverseSexualLust he came at the Chain Chomp Galaxy?]]\
1137'''slowbeef:''' It's like "How can I add a bunch of sprites that don't belong in galaxies? Oh wait, I'm unskilled at technical things."\
1138'''Diabetus:''' "No, there's not enough Chain Chomps in Chain Chomp Galaxy!"\
1139'''slowbeef:''' Or when he's playing VideoGame/TheLegendOfZeldaLinksAwakening and they have that Chain Chomp, he goes "[[BigYes YES!]]"\
1140'''Diabetus:''' "My {{Crossover}} {{Fanfic}} come to life!"\
1141'''slowbeef:''' "Nintendo DID get my letters!"\
1142'''Diabetus:''' "I knew they'd eventually respond in their own special way!"\
1143'''slowbeef:''' "Put a goddamn Chain Chomp in Zelda just to shut this [=OmegaEdge=] kid up!"
1144** Then for [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t8hBYlOAuSI&feature=relmfu Part 4]], they skip ahead a few videos to find that [=OmegaEdge29=] has added platforms and cannons floating in the sky... and there seem to be [[ObviousBeta a bunch of bugs]] that are causing "Access Violations":
1145--> ''[[=OmegaEdge29=] lands on a button, and an Access Violation message appears.]''\
1146'''slowbeef:''' ''[laughing]'' That's what the button did!\
1147'''Diabetus:''' Did you pilot test your hack before it went into production?\
1148''[[=OmegaEdge29=] closes the emulator, showing a blue vortex background.]''\
1149'''slowbeef:''' What?\
1150'''Diabetus:''' Oh, wow, the whole world is gone!\
1151''[[=OmegaEdge29=] starts reloading the rom.]''\
1152'''Diabetus:''' "Kaizo just imploded on itself, sorry."\
1153''[[=OmegaEdge29=] reloads the rom; slowbeef cracks up]''\
1154'''slowbeef:''' Man! [[SarcasmMode Master programmer!]]\
1155'''Diabetus:''' "It's all a part of the hack, guys, alright? It's the challenge."\
1156'''slowbeef:''' You have to take savestates in case everything crashes.\
1157...\
1158'''slowbeef:''' You have to be a master to be able to complete this game- a master of computer science! Only 8 terabytes of RAM required to play Kaizo Mario 64!\
1159'''Diabetus:''' "I hope you have your Playstation 3 booted up, 'cause this is Kaizo Mario 64."\
1160'''slowbeef:''' I heard this romhack made Watson retarded.\
1161'''Diabetus:''' "What's that Sony? You need a launch game for [=PS4=]? Let me show you what I've been working on."\
1162''[[=OmegaEdge29=] falls down, revealing the level to be Whomp's Fortress]''\
1163'''Diabetus:''' Oh, it's Whomp's Fortress!\
1164'''slowbeef:''' Yeah, you didn't notice that from the way it just sort of scaled in from nowhere? You don't remember the part of Whomp's Fortress where there were cannons shooting you out of the sky, and your Nintendo 64 would ''blow up?''\
1165'''Diabetus:''' I forgot how many times I had to reboot the N64 to beat this game.\
1166'''slowbeef:''' Creator/ShigeruMiyamoto comes in [[ChristmasRushed three months early]], "Fuck it boys, ship it!"
1167** Then there's ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_Idx3hLVuy8 That's So Kaizo! DVD Extras]]'': having found that [=OmegaEdge29=] deleted all of his videos, the duo decide to return with {{LetsPlay/Bikdiponabus}}'s Let's Play of it instead:
1168-->''[[=BikdipOnABus=] passes a large amount of Heave Hos concentrated on a small platform]''\
1169'''Diabetus:''' Oh, we found the Chain Chomps of this level, at least.\
1170'''slowbeef:''' I know, right? "Put a thousand of those flipping guys on [the platform]!"\
1171'''Diabetus:''' "More! MOOOORE!"\
1172'''slowbeef:''' "Control+V! Control+V! Control+V! It's too easy for [=BikdipOnABus=]!"
1173** By about the halfway point, the duo start having trouble deciding whether they should be making fun of Bikdip's [[DullSurprise monotone]] [[FlatJoy delivery]] that clashes with both his high pride in his game-playing abilities and constant discussion of some dream he'd had that ''would'' have sounded interesting if it were delivered with any amount of energy[[labelnote:*]]It basically involved turning Earth itself [[PlanetSpaceship into a spaceship]] and flying around the universe to get away from the dying sun and find aliens[[/labelnote]], or [=OmegaEdge=]'s [[MoonLogicPuzzle incomprehensible ideas]] on [[FakeDifficulty what should be done]] to make ''Mario 64'' more difficult.
1174-->'''Bikdip:''' ...I thought it was sort of high up, you had to jump to it.\
1175'''slowbeef:''' ''(imitating Bikdip)'' "But I was wrong."\
1176'''Diabetus:''' ''(also imitating Bikdip)'' "For once."\
1177'''slowbeef:''' Heheh. "Rare time in my life."\
1178'''Diabetus:''' "I had a dream, or should I say a nightmare, where I was wrong once about my project."\
1179''(Bikdip jumps off into what appears to be empty space for no reason)''\
1180'''slowbeef:''' Yeah just keep stomping on the cage-''(Bikdip then hits an invisible secret in mid-air and reveals the star)'' wait, what, that was...?\
1181'''Diabetus:''' [[SarcasmMode Yeah, that was there, sure.]]\
1182'''slowbeef:''' ''Holy shit'', I don't know who the fuck to make fun of in this thing!
1183* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x1msHeyNn8s The LP is terrible...I hope it doesn't last]]''. Can someone top WebVideo/TheNostalgiaCritic's LetsPlay in terms of awfulness? teddybearmassacure aims to try:
1184-->'''slowbeef:''' ...I watched ''three seconds'' of this video and I told 'beetus 'Let's do this sight unseen.' [...] Anyway, ready?\
1185'''Diabetus:''' Ready.\
1186'''teddybearmassacure''': Okay! We're back to ''Film/CharlieAndTheChocolateFactory'' Part FIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVE!\
1187'''Diabetus:''' [[ThisIsGonnaSuck Ooh, you weren't kidding.]]\
1188'''teddybearmassacure''': YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYY!\
1189[...]\
1190'''slowbeef:''' Whenever he speaks I feel like my blood is turning to roaches.\
1191'''Diabetus:''' Or taffy.\
1192[...]\
1193'''slowbeef:''' Oh my god, I would rather ''masturbate with sandpaper'' than talk to this kid in real life.\
1194[...]\
1195'''slowbeef:''' Goddamnit, I wish Creator/GeneWilder would yell at him!\
1196'''Diabetus:''' [...] YOUR VIDEO IS SHIT! GOOD DAY SIR!\
1197'''slowbeef:''' YOU! GET! NOTHING!\
1198[...]\
1199'''slowbeef''': Hold on. I'm gonna look away from the video because I can't take it anymore.\
1200'''Diabetus''': Oh really, you can't watch this?\
1201'''slowbeef''': I feel like I'm having a fucking stroke!\
1202[...]\
1203'''Diabetus:''' ''[singing]'' Oompa Loompa Doopedy Doo! I've got a crappy Let's Play for you! Oompa Loompa Doopedy Dee! If you are wise you'll delete this LP!
1204** At one point, he complains about the game lagging.
1205-->'''teddybearmassacure''': I'm lagging!\
1206'''Diabetus''': Oh, shut up. [''Beat''] Lagging.\
1207'''teddybearmassacure''': This game, a Game Boy game, is laaagging on me.\
1208'''slowbeef''': Oh my God, ''how.''\
1209'''Diabetus''': That's an impossible thing to happen.\
1210'''teddybearmassacure''': This Game Boy game is laaagging.\
1211'''slowbeef''': Let's repeat it.\
1212'''Diabetus''': Yeah. "Laaaggging"\
1213'''slowbeef''': Ten years from now [breaks into impression of him] "I still haven't had sex with a girl!"\
1214'''Diabetus''': "My penis is laaagging!"\
1215'''slowbeef''': "I still haven't had sex..."\
1216'''Diabetus''': "My PWA is laaagging!"\
1217'''slowbeef''': "The prostitute just took my money and laughed at me."\
1218'''Diabetus''': "And punched me in the face. I even gave her Laffy Taffy."
1219* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q0kzWkqp2q0 The Nostalgia Critic Jumps the Shark While Sputtering and Cursing About It]]'': Their video on the Nostalgia Critic's Let's Play of Bart's Nightmare has Slowbeef and Diabetus suffering through one of the worst [=LPs=] they have ever seen.
1220-->'''slowbeef:''' I don't believe it! I'm genuinely getting annoyed by this!\
1221'''Diabetus:''' Just now? ''It took you half the video?!''\
1222'''slowbeef:''' ''[livid]'' He makes five digits off this, according to Wikipedia. He quit his job and he makes ''this''. And you tell me I don't have a right to be mad. I could have not gotten a degree and all I could have done was 'YRGH DRGH GRGH' while I played video games and recorded it, and that would have literally been better than this.
1223** Anything where they start mocking his constant {{Angrish}} is guaranteed to be funny.
1224-->'''slowbeef:''' He's like a weird sine wave. 'OHWOWNOWIMPRETENDINGTOBEINSANE okay now I'm normal again BUTNOWIMPRETENDINGAGAIN!'
1225** slowbeef addresses the Critic:
1226-->'''slowbeef:''' Doug. Can I call you Doug? Because I feel like you've put me through something here.
1227** Eventually, they assign him a modified Ridley voice.
1228-->'''slowbeef:''' Gotta pay the bills this month AAGH!
1229** This bit:
1230-->'''slowbeef:''' Could you stop waggling that enormous finger at me?\
1231'''Nostalgia Critic:''' SHUT UP!\
1232'''Diabetus:''' You heard him.
1233* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dpkoaSoiaiE This is a damn trainwreck.]]''
1234-->'''gameguy3424:''' So sorry about that, my mother needed a little bit of help with her fish tank...\
1235'''slowbeef:''' Is this, like, a LetsPlay, or does this guy not know about Twitter?\
1236'''Diabetus:''' "In lieu of doing commentary, I will change my Facebook status for every move I make in ''Mario 3''."\
1237'''slowbeef:''' "Got a fireflower, updated two minutes ago." "Shot a fireball, updated one minute ago." "Still sucks at ''Mario 3'', updated now."\
1238'''Diabetus:''' "gamerguy3424 has lost 50 friends."\
1239'''slowbeef:''' "This brings him to a total of negative 400."\
1240''[gameguy3424 starts whistling the level music]''\
1241'''Diabetus:''' This is riveting commentary, by the way.\
1242'''slowbeef:''' He can't even whistle. He's just, like, ''blowing''.\
1243'''Diabetus:''' 'Oh shit, I'm out of commentary! Uh, uh, THPPPP THHHHPPPPPP TTTTHHHHPPPP'\
1244...\
1245'''gameguy3424:''' [[VideoGame/StarFox Do a barrel roll!]]\
1246'''slowbeef:''' OH, FOR FUCK'S SAKES!\
1247'''Diabetus:''' ''[growls]''\
1248'''slowbeef:''' I ''hate'' VideoGame/StarFox! Just for that, I hate VideoGame/StarFox! Fuckin' idiots, that - Why is that even a catchphrase?\
1249...\
1250'''gameguy3424:''' Do a barrel roll!\
1251'''slowbeef:''' AGAIN?! What are you, joking?
1252* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a95iY9zsPJs This Is It?]]'', featuring all the hallmarks of a bad [=LP=] once more, this time to ''VideoGame/MichaelJacksonsMoonwalker''.
1253-->'''slowbeef:''' Um... I think we're InMediasRes again.\
1254'''Diabetus:''' Hey, this video looks... "Bad". ''[slowbeef busts out laughing]''\
1255'''slowbeef:''' Are you kidding me? Go "Beat It"!\
1256'''Diabetus:''' ''[under his breath]'' [[ThisIsGonnaSuck It's gonna be one of]] ''[[ThisIsGonnaSuck those]]'' [[ThisIsGonnaSuck Retsupuraes, isn't it?]]
1257* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O7dnofuSMNo This is Kokiri Forest [citation needed] ]]'' features a [=LPer=] messing around in a video editing program, adding an absurd degree of "add-ons":
1258-->''[a Kokiri Forest-themed border is visible around the LP video]''\
1259'''slowbeef:''' So we got this weird picture-in-picture thing goin', which looks phenomenal, I might- I must say.\
1260'''Diabetus:''' Yeah, it's like watching a Let's Play in 3D.\
1261'''slowbeef:''' Oh, yeah. It's beautiful, really. It's like ''Film/{{Avatar}}''.\
1262'''Diabetus:''' I feel like I'm ''in'' Kokiri Forest.\
1263''[the [=LPer=] talks to Mido; the border blinks to green for a moment, and Mido's 3D model is suddenly overlaid on top of the border]''\
1264'''Diabetus:''' I- uh, huh?\
1265'''slowbeef:''' Oh. Uhh...\
1266'''Diabetus:''' That's one of his clever add-ons?\
1267'''slowbeef:''' That's kind of frightening, if you want to know the truth. ...That was like [[WebVideo/BenDrowned that one thing the kid did when he said his, like, ROM was being hacked or something by a ghost]].\
1268'''Diabetus:''' Who is this giant invading Kokiri Forest?!\
1269'''slowbeef:''' It's like... this is like the Santa's Workshop version of ''Film/TheRing''. What's going on with this thing? It's staring at me.\
1270'''Diabetus:''' Gradually gets larger.\
1271''Later on...''\
1272'''Diabetus:''' Now that we're in the scene with the Deku Tree, here's a picture of the Deku Tree. In case you're ''really'' stupid.
1273* [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hOPAMS3RkXk This Let's Play is Highly Recommended for [DATA EXPUNGED].]] The RP itself is hilarious, but the crowner is the description: Ridley in the Website/SCPFoundation.
1274* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GNZOd2Z-8Qw To Boldly Go! Somewhere else!]]'' Featuring the Enterprise glowing pink.
1275--> '''slowbeef''': I really don't understand the hot pink aspect of it.\
1276'''Diabetus''': Captain, you're slowly becoming fabulous.\
1277'''slowbeef''': The Enterprise has the best club in the galaxy.
1278** During a particularly boring battle:
1279-->'''Diabetus''': Data, could you put in your emotion chip so you can at least sound ''interested'' in this Let's Play?\
1280'''slowbeef''': [[Film/StarTrekGenerations Ohhh, shiiiiiit...]]
1281* How about ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dwmpd2hjtpE The Tower Of Horrible Voices?]]''
1282** "Oh shut up you dumb shit. You little fuckin' spaz. You're gonna do this for the whole video, aren't you?"
1283** "Oh, I'm so good at video games. I'm the best. This is not hard at all. '''NOW I'M DOING DIALOGUE! THIS IS SO FUNNY AND NOT ANNOYING!'''"
1284** "Oh God, I have to put my video on [=YouTube=] and annoy the Internet!"
1285** The [=LPer=] also attempts to voice act for every line of dialogue. When an instance comes where it says 'Grrrrr', the guys beat him to the punch by snarling loudly.
1286** At one point, Diabetus wonders if ''Franchise/{{Saw}}'' would've been successful if Jigsaw had Jack Chainsaw's voice.
1287** Lijik's gimmick gets so annoying that someone ''in real life'' knocks on his room's door to shut him up. This doesn't go unnoticed by the guys. As Diabetus put it: "YES MOM, I WILL DO THE D- I mean, yes, mother, I will do the dishes [[CallBack and hang the plant]]".
1288** Slowbeef actually singles out a comment by [=rafigirl123=] for praise, and Diabetus says to go thumbs up the comment. It has 2505 thumbs up as of this writing, while Lijik's asshole response has been marked as spam.
1289-->'''slowbeef:''' Okay, I have never done this before but I am going to praise a comment on this video- ''[Lijik pipes up with the voice again]'' SHUT UP SO I CAN TALK!\
1290'''[=rafigirl123=]:''' "Your god-this-is-hard schtick is more annoying than funny."\
1291'''Diabetus:''' I could barely hear what you're saying but yeah I think I got it.\
1292'''slowbeef:''' If I could thumbs that up times a million, I would! Thank you, [=rafigirl123!=]\
1293'''Diabetus:''' Everybody, go thumbs up that comment right now.\
1294'''slowbeef:''' [=LijikLetsPlay's=] response: ''[imitates Lijik's grating Jack Chainsaw voice]'' "I'LL GO BACK IN TIME-" ''[goes back to normal very quickly]'' Nah, I won't do that. "I'll go back in time five months and make sure something I only did in two videos never happens, thank you." You obnoxious little prick! She's absolutely fucking right! "Oh, I'll go back in time and make sure this doesn't happen-" '''You know what? See that you do, you little fucking spaz!'''\
1295'''Diabetus:''' How do you really feel?\
1296'''slowbeef:''' Get the fuck off my internet!
1297** Nearing the end, slowbeef wonders why the two video responses they got, couldn't have been directed at Lijik instead.
1298--->'''slowbeef:''' Why doesn't like that [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oWfRzwM6Gws fat kid]], like do a death threat to him instead of us? ''[Diabetus chuckles]'' Seriously...\
1299The [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HMRJ6OL9c30 Asian kid]] can mispronounce his name, too. I mean, come on...\
1300''[....]''\
1301'''slowbeef:''' ''[imitating]'' I'm pissed off right now over... this voice.\
1302'''Diabetus:''' ''[also imitating]'' You gotta stop... making vids.
1303* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hAxRfWVxyZw Transformers Review?]]'', this comment from Proteus when the screen cuts to a greyscaled picture of the reviewer's face flashing an angry expression.
1304-->'''Proteus:''' This is like the end of ''Film/RequiemForADream''.
1305* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xtkrf1oKGwI Trouble with the law? Better call Saul (Slendamann)]]'', the guys hear the [=LPer=]'s odd pronunciation of "Slenderman" and run away with the idea that the Slenderman is actually a Jewish lawyer named Saul Slendamann, for the entire rest of the video.
1306** The first thing that happens in the video, Diabetus notices the Unregistered Hypercam '''3''' watermark.
1307--> '''Diabetus''': There's a ''three'' now?\
1308'''slowbeef''': Apparently!
1309* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nbXFg5Wji4k&feature=plcp Two squares play a game about Hollywood]]'', featuring [=BillyMC=] with his guest [=TheLimePopsicle=], with both of them getting very excited over an NES Hollywood Squares game.
1310-->'''[=BillyMC=]:''' I'm gonna say yes, I'm gonna agree with that. ''[gets the question wrong] No!''\
1311'''Diabetus:''' And Billy's pride was shattered that day.\
1312...\
1313'''[=BillyMC=]:''' If you get [this question] correct, you'll win a trip to Australia!\
1314'''[=TheLimePopsicle=]:''' Oh yeah, I could go there!\
1315'''Diabetus:''' ''[cracking up]'' You're not actually- ''You're not actually going to Australia!''\
1316'''slowbeef:''' I love that response. "Yeah, I could go there."\
1317'''Diabetus:''' The first NES game to give ACTUAL prizes.\
1318...\
1319'''[=TheLimePopsicle=]:''' "...if your younger sister is constantly playing with [[FreudianSlip yourself]]-" no-\
1320'''slowbeef:''' Oh! Oh, god, g- ''[laughs]''\
1321'''Diabetus:''' Well, that's in the PG-13 version of Hollywood Squares.\
1322'''slowbeef:''' Yeah, Billy's like, "Shit! I'm gonna have to put this under adults only!"\
1323'''Diabetus:''' "Well, there's the explicit rating!"\
1324...\
1325'''[=TheLimePopsicle=]:''' Oh, this is so hard!\
1326'''slowbeef:''' ''There's two fucking choices!''\
1327'''Diabetus:''' I don't know if I have a 50/50 chance on this one.\
1328'''[=TheLimePopsicle=]:''' ''[after getting the question wrong]'' Oh, [=BillyMC=], you got another chance!\
1329''[slowbeef and Diabetus crack up]''\
1330'''Diabetus:''' They're so into this!\
1331'''slowbeef:''' ...it's like Franchise/TheSmurfs play Hollywood Squares, like "Oh I lost, but [=BillyMC=] you got another chance!"\
1332'''[=BillyMC=]:''' ''[answers a question incorrectly]'' NO THEY DO!\
1333''[slowbeef and Diabetus crack up again]''\
1334'''Diabetus:''' HOLY SHIT!\
1335...\
1336''[[=TheLimePopsicle=] gets a question wrong, costing him the game]''\
1337'''[=BillyMC=]:''' Ah, no victory for you now!\
1338''[slowbeef and Diabetus crack up again]''\
1339'''Diabetus:''' Billy's pride swelled three times that day.
1340* In ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NO-K55PfGRk The Unfair Retsupurae]]'', annoyed at [=SonikDude101=]'s exaggerated reactions, Slowbeef and Diabetus wonder if that's how he reacts to real life difficulties as well, pondering also if they should reevaluate their LP styles accordingly to be more famous. Then this exchange occurs:
1341-->'''slowbeef:''' I know, it's like you're playing VideoGame/ModernWarfare 2 and you're like "OH MY GOD, MY GRENADE ROLLS BACK DOWN!!! WHAT HAPPENED..."\
1342'''Diabetus:''' You're in an actual army and you're saying that. *both laugh* "I JUST GOT FRAGGED!!!"\
1343'''slowbeef:''' "THESE BLACKWATER MERCS ARE FUCKING THINGS UP!!!"\
1344'''Diabetus:''' "I'M NEVER GONNA SEE MY WIFE AND KIDS AGAIN!!! THAT'S BULLSHIT!!!"\
1345'''slowbeef:''' "I CAN'T BELIEVE THERE'S A FUCKING KID SHOOTING AT ME, THIS IS TERRIBLE!!!"
1346** And then there's this exchange earlier in the video:
1347-->'''[=SonikDude101=]:''' What the fuck!? Why did I sign up to do this!?\
1348'''slowbeef:''' Oh, I ''hate'' when they fucking say that shit.\
1349'''Diabetus:''' Like "why would I do this?", "what am I doing?"...\
1350'''slowbeef:''' "WHY IS GOD FORCING ME TO DO THIS!? WHY DID THE YOUTUBE EMPEROR MAKE ME PLAY THIS GAME!?"\
1351'''Diabetus:''' Well, you know what it is? It's peer pressure.\
1352'''slowbeef:''' Who is his peer, though?\
1353'''Diabetus:''' He- ''[[=SonikDude101=] dies again, then interrupts him with yet another over-the-top laughing reaction.]'' He's just getting in with the wrong crowd, man... only on a much more nerdy level.\
1354'''slowbeef:''' I'm sorry, I can't hear you over the ''circus orgasms'' he's having.\
1355'''Diabetus:''' Well, I was just saying- ''[Diabetus imitates [=SonikDude101=]'s fake laughter]''
1356* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KOQMvDqBchs Unregistered Commentary 2]]'' has two golden moments. First, the subtitles go "Boy do I wish I could do voice commentary." Second, the [=LPer=] goes on a tangent about motorcycle people driving by his house.
1357* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e9OCrrTr1xE This Video Had a 1280x540 Resolution]]'' has an amazingly incompetent ''VideoGame/{{Castlevania|I}}'' [=LPer=] who somehow squishes the video so severely that most of the text is illegible.
1358-->'''slowbeef''': Well, he has one fork[[note]]Stage[[/note]], according to the upper right.\
1359'''Diabetus''': Yeah...\
1360'''slowbeef''': And it looks like... five hundred photos[[note]]Score[[/note]] on the upper left.\
1361'''Diabetus''': And the two meters on the left, they're... something.\
1362'''slowbeef''': He has a high yaoi[[note]]Player (life)[[/note]] meter, but it went down once he got hit by the cougar.\
1363'''Diabetus''': Right, but he hasn't had much "Chef-E"[[note]]Enemy (life)[[/note]]. It's full for now, but I dunno how long it'll last.\
1364'''slowbeef''': I think that's the "Crate" meter. I think he ate a crate before he started this. With his one fork.\
1365'''Diabetus''': You think he's going to run out of... "rotos"?[[note]]Score, again[[/note]]\
1366'''slowbeef''': ''[chuckling]'' I dunno his "hog-n"... his "hog-n"[[note]]Time[[/note]] is slowly ticking away.
1367* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ibaPEq9qCKg Warning: Serious Eye Damage Hazard]]'' has a good bit halfway through the video.
1368-->'''slowbeef:''' Oh, it's a ''kid''.\
1369'''Proteus:''' Whatever, I don't give a fuck! No excuses! I don't give a shit, I don't care if he's four! Don't do shit like this, I don't give a fuck how old you are, this is a bad idea! I'm not gonna fucking pretend like this video's okay 'cause the kid's fuckin' retarded and seven years old!\
1370'''slowbeef:''' ''[chuckles]'' I am morally outraged, but I must agree.\
1371'''Proteus:''' How can you be morally outraged!? If my son did this, I would ''[[DisproportionateRetribution kill him!]]''\
1372''[slowbeef bursts into laughter]''\
1373'''slowbeef:''' "I WOULD MURDER MY CHILD IF HE DARED--"\
1374'''Proteus:''' I would murder my child for making a video of this poor quality!\
1375'''slowbeef:''' "You embarrass my family with this Let's Play!?"\
1376'''Proteus:''' Don't you know me!? I did ''VideoGame/{{Daikatana}}'' and you make this shit!? '''FUCK YOU.'''\
1377'''Diabetus:''' "Did you learn nothing from me!?"\
1378'''slowbeef:''' "The one thing I said to your mother was 'I want him to be a good Let's Player when he grows up', and now look at what you've done!"\
1379'''Diabetus:''' "You couldn't even take after your dad!"\
1380'''Proteus:''' Fuck school, fuck sports, he doesn't need to do any of that, but he's gonna be a good LP'er, god damn it!\
1381'''slowbeef:''' "The only grade that matters is the one that can be rated on a scale of 1 to 5!"\
1382'''Proteus:''' ''[laughs]'' With stars!\
1383'''slowbeef:''' "You've failed me for the last time, [=Samuelking100=] Proteus Jr.!"\
1384'''Proteus:''' The only worthwhile thing anybody will ever say to you will be through text comments on your [=YouTube=] page!\
1385'''slowbeef:''' "Now you get out of my sight, and don't come back downstairs 'til you own a Gamebridge!"
1386* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m5TW2PfwxMQ What The? (CENSORED)]]'': The trio are left confused at an LP of ''VideoGame/SuperMarioBros3'' which uses obnoxiously loud sound effects and save states at the most unfortunate times.
1387-->'''Proteus:''' This is like the audio version of epilepsy.
1388** Diabetus drops this gem on the sudden [[MoodWhiplash transition]] from [[SugarWiki/AwesomeMusic the prologue music from]] ''VideoGame/CastlevaniaSymphonyOfTheNight'' to [[StockSoundEffects fart noises]]:
1389-->'''Diabetus:''' That's like having Music/TheBeatles open for your son's GarageBand.
1390** The [=LPer's=] abuse of savestates (all the way to using ''30'' save slots by the end) bites him in the ass when he savestate right before getting hit by a fireball. Proteus' joyful reaction is priceless.
1391** The fact that the Nostalgic Rage HQ channnel is (now was) a ''group'' of different videomakers makes slowbeef really confused.
1392--> '''Proteus:''' Nostalgic Rage Productions is now a team that has people who are specialists in their categories of videos.\
1393'''slowbeef:''' ''What?!'' So, like, they are the X-Men of Let's Play? I gettin' that right?
1394** Then, after nine and a half minutes of fail, the video abruptly ends with a piano version of ''[[VideoGame/ChronoCross Departed Souls]]'':
1395--> '''slowbeef:''' What th-!\
1396'''Proteus:''' Oh! Hello... piano out of nowhere. What the fuck?\
1397'''slowbeef:''' What, did someone ''die''?\
1398'''Proteus:''' Yes! Mario did! Many, many times!
1399* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nhhpf5GOvEA When You're Here, You're Family]]''. The ''Mario 64'' Let's Player repeatedly says he wants his fans to see him as family (by following him on Facebook) and throwing around random inspirational phrases about following your dreams. He begins telling a very brief, simple story about himself going over to a friend's house to play ''VideoGame/FinalFantasyXIII'', which somehow takes '''nearly 20 minutes''' to tell because he keeps distracting himself and going off onto tangents about random things.
1400-->'''[=RifleGaming=]:''' At this point I'm tired. I mean, not tired - hungry.\
1401'''slowbeef:''' Either way! I mix those up all the time. "Aw, I brought a hamburger to bed again! Dammit! Keep getting confused!"
1402** Riflegaming talks about gaming in an AccidentalInnuendo fashion.
1403-->'''[=RifleGaming=]:''' His parents, y'know, finally went to sleep, we had the whole downstairs to ourselves. We're like ''oh, yeaaah''... Gonna play some ''video games''! I got really excited...
1404** Just to give an idea of how ridiculously long-winded and meandering the story is, he begins telling the story at almost the beginning of the video, continuously diverts into completely unrelated topics and at one point ''restarts'' the story, until he offhandedly gets to the punchline of the story (that he defeated the ''Final Fantasy XIII'' final boss while looking through his friend's fridge), and then essentially continues talking about nothing for almost another ten minutes. Most of this length comes from completely inane details that cause him to completely lose his train of thought or CaptainObvious observations.
1405-->'''[=RifleGaming=]:''' ...so I was stressin' out a little bit, but still... killin' it. By the way, the kitchen is right next to his living room.\
1406'''slowbeef:''' ''WHO CARES, BRIAN!?''\
1407'''[=RifleGaming=]:''' ...and the bedrooms are upstairs, that's where they went to sleep at.\
1408'''slowbeef:''' God, that's where they went to sleep, the bedrooms, who'd have thought?!
1409** He talks about interacting with his friend's parents, which apparently consists of him laughing nervously whenever he's asked a question. slowbeef and Diabetus can't hold in their laughter. This is despite having no problems offhandedly discussing his masturbation habits earlier in the video.
1410-->'''Diabetus:''' I mean, there was the prelude of talking to his parents like ''(nervous giggle)''.\
1411'''slowbeef:''' Yeah, what was with that?! How awkward do you have to be around them? "I just sit there, like, 'Hey, how's school going?' ''(nervous laugh)''" Why would you let your son hang out with this guy if that's how he speaks to you? "I'm worried about Jimmy, his friend Brian doesn't seem to speak! Wait, it's nighttime, I think they're playing video games."
1412** Bowser jumps in the air as [=RifleGaming=] continues rambling, prompting Diabetus to shout "SHUT UPPP!" in Bowser's voice.
1413** The fact the RP [[{{Bookends}} begins and ends with a strange greeting/sign-off]] by Rifle that slowbeef parrots incredulously.
1414-->'''[=RifleGaming=]:''' What's-a pop-a-loppin', pop-a-loppers?\
1415'''slowbeef:''' ..."Pop-a-loppers"??\
1416...\
1417'''[=RifleGaming=]:''' Peace out. Girl scouts.\
1418'''slowbeef''': ...What? "Peace out, girl scouts"???
1419** This comment:
1420-->all of a sudden, the #1 Bestselling Book is "How I Beat Final Fantasy 13 While in A Fridge"\
14211542 pages for a plotline that should be as long as a middle school book report.
1422* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B6OVduqiHN0 Where In Time is Mario?]]'' has a Southern Let's Player who doesn't understand the rewind button on an emulator. Hilarity ensues, especially at the end.
1423-->'''[=LPer=]:''' Yeah! '''WHOOOOOOOOOOOO-WHEEEE'''-'''''EE!!!'''''\
1424'''slowbeef:''' Wow. I imagine he's twirling his cowboy hat right now.\
1425'''[=LPer=]:''' The pain has finally substanded.\
1426'''slowbeef:''' What? Is he in constant pain unless he finishes Mario romhack levels?\
1427'''Diabetus:''' He did this in a barn, right?
1428* It may be the ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JR94fOBDFcs Worst Retsupurae Ever]]'', but the last minute is a comedy ''goldmine''.
1429-->'''Proteus:''' Oh, ''that's'' what all this is; he asked for votes on which Pokémon he should use next, or whatever.\
1430'''Diabetus:''' Who cares? They're all the same.\
1431'''Proteus:''' No, you guys need to vote in ''our'' text comments.\
1432'''slowbeef:''' ''[starts laughing]''\
1433'''Diabetus:''' Which Pokémon should this guy use in his next video? Which was made over a year ago.\
1434'''slowbeef:''' We'll get LetsPlay/DeceasedCrab to enforce.\
1435'''Proteus:''' You're dead to the [=YouTube=] LP community.\
1436'''slowbeef:''' ''[speaking in a Deceased Crab-like voice]'' Hey, I'm the [=YouTube=] LP Emperor! You have to do video 19 over with the following Pokémon.\
1437'''Diabetus:''' ''[speaks in his own Deceased Crab voice]'' If it's not a crab-based Pokémon, I'm going to block you! [[CatchPhrase Huzzah!]]\
1438'''Proteus:''' ''[does the same]'' Huzzah!\
1439'''slowbeef:''' [[SarcasmMode This is the most perfect Deceased Crab impression there is!]] I sound just like him right now!\
1440'''Diabetus:''' I'm perpetually in puberty!\
1441'''slowbeef:''' [[SelfDeprecation This is the most horrible Retsupurae video we ever made!]]\
1442'''Proteus:''' Huzzah, this sucks!\
1443'''slowbeef:''' Huzzah.\
1444'''Diabetus:''' I'm gonna kill myself after watching this! Dagnabbit!\
1445'''slowbeef:''' ''[sputters-]'' Bakesale. ''[normal voice, cracks up]'' Why did we start on Deceased Crab, again?
1446** There's also this lovely interaction at the very start of the video, a rare capture from before the RP even officially begins:
1447-->'''slowbeef:''' Three... Two... One... Play.\
1448'''Proteus:''' ''[Misses the cue to begin playing the video from his end]'' Oh shit, I was supposed to play.\
1449'''slowbeef:''' Oh, I'll wait, I'll wait.\
1450'''Proteus:''' Yeah, let's- can we restart?\
1451'''slowbeef:''' Yeah, we can restart.\
1452'''Proteus:''' Hahahah, sorry.\
1453'''slowbeef:''' That's all right.\
1454'''Diabetus:''' ''[Mocking]'' Video's over.\
1455'''Proteus:''' I was reading s- I was reading something Suspicious said.\
1456'''slowbeef:''' ''[Mocking]'' YOU'RE OUT OF HERE, WHERE'S DAVE_O?!\
1457'''Proteus:''' ''[Laughs]''\
1458'''slowbeef:''' All right, uh... Three... Two... One... Play.\
1459''[Video begins for real.]''
1460-->'''Proteus:''' Don't threaten to replace me with Dave_O, you cunt.\
1461'''slowbeef:''' ''[Annoyed]'' We're recording!\
1462'''Proteus:''' I know!\
1463'''slowbeef:''' ''[Sarcastic]'' With a lack of professionalism like this...\
1464'''Proteus:''' ''[Laughs]''
1465-->'''slowbeef:''' Watch the Pokémon Let's Play, the good kind!\
1466'''Proteus:''' Oh, it's some British faggot.\
1467'''Diabetus:''' The "good kind"?
1468* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LzEotMwGuWg "Yeah, hide right there!" (Retsupurae Metal Gear Solid) (w/ Shmorky)]]''
1469-->'''[=MrMasked=]:''' Going in the water... man, is it just me or does that look completely retarded? Like, what the hell is Snake doing right now?\
1470'''slowbeef:''' Oh my god, you couldn't make this more boring.\
1471'''Diabetus:''' What is this walking underwater bullshit?!\
1472'''slowbeef:''' I'm hardcore, the way I walk underwater for no reason!\
1473'''Shmorky:''' THIS IS WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE WHEN YOU WALK UNDERWATER!\
1474'''slowbeef:''' It's this attention to detail that Hideo Kojima threw in.\
1475'''Diabetus:''' One of the many benefits of extreme difficulty.\
1476'''slowbeef:''' I wish he'd picked 'Game Over if Boring'.\
1477''[[=MrMasked=] starts talking with his co-commentator]''\
1478'''Shmorky:''' Is someone telling him how to play?\
1479'''slowbeef:''' I think so. I think he's got a coach!\
1480'''Shmorky:''' YOU GONNA-YOU GONNA PLAY THIS GAME? OKAY, RUN AROUND IN CIRCLES NOW!\
1481'''slowbeef:''' This is what practice was for all season, Billy! We're not here fuckin' around with a video game!
1482** The main treat though is [=MrMasked's=] complete ineptitude at the game, despite picking the hardest difficulty and [[SmallNameBigEgo declaring himself hardcore]]:
1483-->'''[=MrMasked=]:''' This is like the hardest...thing in the game.\
1484'''slowbeef:''' What? ''This'' is the hardest part of the game?!\
1485'''Diabetus:''' It just started!\
1486'''slowbeef:''' ''[laughter]'' Oh my God!\
1487'''Diabetus:''' I don't think he ever got past this room in any of his playthroughs ever! He thinks this room is the whole game!\
1488'''slowbeef:''' I know! "Once I get to that elevator, it's smooth sailing from here on out!"\
1489'''Diabetus:''' "I'm about halfway finished with the game!"\
1490...\
1491''[[=MrMasked=] gets spotted twice]''\
1492'''slowbeef:''' Oh my God, he can't even use the elevator right!\
1493'''[=MrMasked=]:''' ''[talking to his co-commentator]'' I-I'm trying, I forgot the controls!\
1494'''Diabetus:''' You forgot the controls?!?\
1495'''Shmorky:''' IT GOES UP AND DOWN!!!\
1496'''slowbeef:''' Try the action button, quick!\
1497''[[=MrMasked=] pathetically tries to hide in a corner behind some lockers, leaving half of Snake's body still clearly visible to the guards, and gets shot several times]''\
1498'''slowbeef:''' ''[laughter]'' YEAH, HIDE RIGHT THERE!!\
1499...\
1500''[In the beginning of his third run, [=MrMasked=] starts wandering in the pool again]''\
1501'''Diabetus:''' He's not even going to take off the scuba gear by the end of this video, is he?\
1502'''slowbeef:''' No. ...He's gonna pause it and go get a taco for the last 2 minutes.\
1503'''Shmorky:''' I FUCKING LOVE WALKING UNDERWATER, '''YEAH!!!'''\
1504'''slowbeef:''' This is my favorite part of ''Metal Gear''!\
1505'''Shmorky:''' YEAH, I DON'T HAVE TO DO SHIT!!!\
1506'''slowbeef:''' They should've called it ''Metal Gear Liquid'', 'cause I like liquid!\
1507...\
1508''[Snake gets shot up during his underwater walk and dies]''\
1509'''[=MrMasked=]:''' No, no--It's completely fucking useless!\
1510'''Shmorky:''' Just like you, man.
1511* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sjzR4ulhsGY "Yeah Kirby Superstar, Fuck You Mom!"]]'' featuring a hyperactive {{Keet}} guy playing ''VideoGame/KirbySuperStar''.
1512-->'''xxThornxx:''' AND WE'RE BACK WITH EPISODE FOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUUUUURRRRRRRRR!!!\
1513'''Proteus:''' Aaaahhhhhhhhhh!\
1514...\
1515'''Shmorky:''' Let's play Kirby Super Star! FUCK YOU, MOM!\
1516...\
1517''[Helper transforms from a Plasma Wisp into a Waddle Doo]''\
1518'''xxThornxx:''' Oh, oh, ''oh why?'' ''Why?'' '''WHY?!'''\
1519'''Diabetus:''' ''Why'' are you playing this game?\
1520'''Proteus:''' Damn you, Waddle Doo! ''You have fucked me for the last time, Waddle Doo!''\
1521...\
1522'''Diabetus:''' This guy should be selling used cars, not playing Kirby.\
1523...\
1524'''xxThornxx:''' Dude!\
1525'''Proteus:''' Dude!\
1526'''xxThornxx:''' That's totally awesome!\
1527'''slowbeef:''' What's totally awesome?\
1528'''xxThornxx:''' Hot dogs! Yeah, man! I'd go down for some hot dogs.\
1529'''Diabetus:''' Muthafukin' hot dogs! ''Kirby!''\
1530'''Proteus:''' Nigga, I eat hot dogs for breakfast.
1531* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YtmSY3u9CUM You will not make it through this video]]'', but it's worth trying.
1532-->'''Diabetus:''' ...are you saying [[LetsPlay/SirRonLionHeart this guy's]] not making you enthusiastic about this?\
1533'''Slowbeef:''' You notice he's just wandering around the town, right? It's not like this is a party.\
1534'''Diabetus:''' Goes outside every day, "AWRIGHT, I'M GOING TO CHECK SOME MAIL, HAWHAAAW!"\
1535'''Slowbeef:''' "WOOHOO! CAN YOU BELIEVE IT? AND HERE'S THE MAILBOX" "HELLO I HAVE A LETTER IN MY MOUTH FOR YOU" "THANK YOOOUUU!"
1536** "You know I see that timer at the bottom, that moon can't hit him fast enough!
1537** Just the ending.
1538-->'''Slowbeef:''' I could take a God-damn power drill to the forehead after that... actually will you excuse me? I'm gonna take a fucking power drill to the forehead after that!\
1539({{beat}})\
1540'''Slowbeef:''' ''(mimicking [=SirRonLionHeart's voice=])'' ALRIGHT!!!\
1541'''Diabetus:''' ''(also mimicking his voice)'' ALRIIIGHT!!!
1542[[/folder]]
1543
1544[[folder:Retsupuraes NAVGTR/George Wood]]
1545The works of George Wood are so bizarre and so frequent, they needed a separate folder.
1546* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nHX0loqttHw George Wood likes or doesn't like Toy Story]]'' features piles upon piles of contradictions and weird statements, finally leading up to '''the dethroning of Donkey Kong Country'''.
1547-->'''George Wood:''' Bottom line, when all is said and done, Toy Story has better gameplay than either of the Donkey Kong Country games.\
1548'''slowbeef & Diabetus:''' ''Wait, what? What!?''\
1549'''Diabetus:''' George...\
1550'''slowbeef:''' Are we sure we wanna... get the game?
1551** During the Nightmare Buzz Lightyear boss fight:
1552--->'''George Wood:''' Buzz will warn you before he shoots a laser. So, be sure to listen carefully for his ''egotistical'' taunting.\
1553''(Both goons can't help but chuckle.)''\
1554'''Diabetus:''' I think George Wood's projecting a little bit here.
1555* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qkFFNOLzoPg George Wood Reviews (?) Lost Vikings]]'' features probably the most bizarre conclusion, even by George Wood standards. After skipping the entire game with a cheat code, Wood explains how to beat the final boss and afterwards, other people join him in doing a voiceover of the game's ending. The goons are left confused and wonder if Wood was doing all the voices himself or holding people hostage.
1556-->'''Voiceover:''' SELF DESTRUCT SEQUENCE HAS BEEN INITIATED.\
1557'''slowbeef:''' Wait, what was that?\
1558'''Voiceover:''' I didn't mean to do that.\
1559'''slowbeef:''' Huh?\
1560'''Voiceover:''' 5 SECONDS TILL SELF DESTRUCT...\
1561'''Diabetus:''' Oh, that's George Wood's natural speaking voice.\
1562'''slowbeef:''' Oh.\
1563''(More voiceovers.)''\
1564'''Diabetus:''' I think we've actually gone from ''VideoGame/TheLostVikings'' to the inside of George Wood's head.\
1565'''slowbeef:''' You think he narrates what all the characters are saying in a video game after he finishes it?\
1566'''Diabetus:''' It just happens in his brain.\
1567''(The three voices start yelling simultaneously.)''\
1568'''slowbeef:''' I don't understand why they did this.\
1569'''Diabetus:''' So, is Flights of Fantasy just George Wood and his very wacky family?\
1570'''slowbeef:''' I would think they'd have disowned him... if he came up to them with an idea like this.\
1571'''Diabetus:''' We zoom out from this and see George Wood and his family in a padded room.\
1572'''slowbeef:''' Or he's holding them at gunpoint.\
1573'''Diabetus!Wood:''' You're all going to do some voice acting for me.\
1574'''slowbeef!Wood:''' Say it right. Cocks the hammer.
1575** When Wood narrates: "Let's show them how us Vikings rumble".
1576-->'''Diabetus:''' I would like to see George Wood wearing a Viking outfit.
1577** At the start of the review, slowbeef is confused by Wood skipping to the last level:
1578-->'''Diabetus:''' Wood doesn't even think he's recording anything.
1579** "Although, this seems like it'd be the final confrontation. It isn't."
1580-->'''Diabetus!Wood:''' It's with ''me''.
1581** "Why's George Wood so down on offensive work, [[TakeThat when he's done so much of it over the years]]?"
1582** The Retsupurae's ending:
1583-->'''Diabetus!Wood:''' Let's see how the Vikings rumble!\
1584'''Diabetus:''' The connotation sounds different if you say it more like ''(In the Bill Clinton voice)'' "Let's see how the Vikings rumble!" It means something else, entirely.\
1585'''slowbeef:''' Totally. Totally. I can't wait for like 30-40 years when like the next generation on Earth's [=YouTube=] and finds these videos and they don't know who Bill Clinton is, and they think you're really unfunny.\
1586'''Diabetus!Bill Clinton:''' Fuck you. ''(slowbeef laughs.)''
1587* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8GuGNGwkCvk George Wood Reviews Final Fantasy VIII]]'', and then leaves this bombshell that potentially explains what became of him:
1588-->'''George Wood:''' We'll have continued coverage of this game soon. Oh, by the way: if Square doesn't add voice-overs to ''Final Fantasy IX'', I'm committing suicide. I ''hate'' text.\
1589''(The two goons stifle their laughter.)''\
1590'''slowbeef:''' That's a bit of an overreaction!\
1591'''Diabetus:''' Wow, what a ''mic-drop'' ending statement!\
1592'''slowbeef:''' And the tragedy would be, that they ''don't'' do that, he kills himself, but then it's in ''X''!
1593** This gem?
1594--->'''Wood:''' First off, if this storyline is truly to reach epic levels... then I hope one of the lovers dies. ''(The goons crack up.)''
1595** George's little tangent about the main character, Squall.
1596--->'''Wood:''' As you can see, the full motion video is impressive, but sometimes the characters feel dead inside.\
1597''(The goons crack up.)''\
1598'''Wood:''' They're too mechanical.\
1599'''slowbeef:''' ''(Still snickering)'' Like me.\
1600'''Wood:''' Rinoa's eyes aren't lively enough and Squall's face shows no character. He's over idealized, and the emptiness he feels inside isn't quite captured--\
1601'''slowbeef:''' I really feel like you're extrapolating a lot from this.\
1602'''Diabetus:''' And let me tell you more about George--I mean Squall.
1603** "Welcome to the overworld, home of dated ''Playstation'' graphics."
1604** A good portion of the review is taken up by scenes of Squall and Rinoa dancing with no commentary. At the end, slowbeef wonders if the romance between them melted Wood's icy heart and was why he threw so much shade at Squall earlier.
1605* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XwviLAkYql4 George Wood's WWE Dream Matchup]]'':
1606-->'''George Wood:''' We had a lot of fun creating three fat, black ladies fighting one skinny, white turd! You don't get to do that every day!\
1607''(Said scenario proceeds to play without any further commentary from Wood for the rest of the review, more than half the video!)''
1608* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hEaGhweF1g0 Goldeneye is a terrible game.]]''
1609-->'''slowbeef:''' So he complains about the blocky humans, but the five-sided toilet, that's fine?
1610* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5s0lzbCK9f8 Great Video Game Idea!]]'', George Wood's most infamous video.
1611-->'''slowbeef:''' 'Front-loaded anvils?' How do you fuck up a boob joke?
1612** George's idea for ''Tomb Raider III'' (give Lara Croft breast cancer) leaves the guys in a [[{{Corpsing}} MASSIVE laughing fit]].
1613-->'''slowbeef:''' 'The gaming industry would be shocked!' They certainly ''would'', but not for the right reasons!
1614* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BwUIna1kiaM Mario Kart 64...Tips?]]'': The goons speculating that the series is actually Republican propaganda designed to make people hate Clinton.
1615** "The game gives players a true feeling of racing a go-kart." George says this as Yoshi drives past a giant penguin.
1616* From ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GPmjzQUgD_c Navgtr Responds to the Fans]]'':
1617-->'''George Wood:''' ...''VideoGame/FinalFantasyVII'' is no different from the series' last installments in terms of execution.\
1618'''slowbeef:''' Right, uh...\
1619'''Diabetus:''' Except for just about everything.\
1620'''slowbeef:''' The Materia, the active time battles, uh...\
1621'''Diabetus:''' It's on a [=PlayStation=]...\
1622''(The snowboarding minigame is shown.)''\
1623'''slowbeef:''' Uh, ''the fucking snowboarding minigame that you're showing?''
1624* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7hoh_c-WRNs Navgtr Reviews Contender]]'' is an uncharacteristically normal review of said game, which makes [[GainaxEnding the ending]] all the more jarring:
1625-->'''George Wood:''' This game gets a nice fat K.O.!\
1626''(Cut to Tifa Lockhart in ''VideoGame/{{Ehrgeiz}}'', then the review abruptly ends.)''\
1627'''Diabetus:''' What the hell?\
1628'''slowbeef:''' Okay, wait a minute.
1629* ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yXzxJjIXHik Wait for it...]]''
1630-->'''George Wood:''' ''VideoGame/DonkeyKongCountry1'' is truly perfect. If you do not get this amazing new generation of ''Franchise/DonkeyKong'' madness, ''you are stupid!'' Yes, I know, that's insulting, but it's also the truth! If you're a true video game fan, you will not hesitate in the slightest bit to buy this remarkable piece of video gaming history! ''[Long pause.]''\
1631'''slowbeef:''' Now take this time to reflect on just how stupid you are!\
1632'''Diabetus:''' I think that's what this footage is meant for.\
1633'''slowbeef:''' If you do not buy ''Donkey Kong Country'', then your mother is a whore!\
1634'''Diabetus:''' It may sound insulting, but you're a fucking idiot!\
1635'''slowbeef:''' It may be insulting, but I just fucked your grandmother!\
1636...\
1637''(The review ends with Donkey Kong's [[http://www.dkvine.com/features/images/topsong02.jpg Game Over screen]].)''\
1638'''Diabetus:''' Well this is kind of a somber way to end your video game review, isn't it?\
1639'''slowbeef:''' I'm sure he wanted to put the word "IDIOT" right in the center there, but he couldn't figure out how.
1640* Diabetus's UsefulNotes/BillClinton jokes:
1641** ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M8LFOVGUt2g Nintendo 64 vs. PlayStation]]'':
1642---> '''slowbeef:''' You're not gonna come up with [[RunningGag another Clinton joke]]; just forget it. \
1643'''Diabetus:''' ''(Bill Clinton impression)'' Look at my pants and I'll show you why they call it the [=PlayStation=]!\
1644'''slowbeef:''' ...[[{{Touche}} I stand corrected]].
1645** ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bv_U4OnoFkg Ultimate Comprehensive Endless Fun FF6 Walkthrough.]]'' As soon as the ''Series/GamingInTheClintonYears'' title card appears...
1646--->'''Diabetus:''' ''(Bill Clinton impression)'' I don't steal, I treasure hunt... for boobies.\
1647'''slowbeef:''' Very nice. I missed that.
1648** Another gem, from ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3sdEed_f0y8 Xenogears]]'':
1649--->'''slowbeef:''' Okay, this is ''Videogame/{{Xenogears}}'', [[TemptingFate so there's no fucking way you'll have a Bill Clinton joke.]]\
1650'''Diabetus:''' ''(Bill Clinton impression)'' I'll show you something that's [[http://xenosaga.wikia.com/wiki/Weltall Weltall]]! \
1651'''slowbeef:''' ''(Actually impressed)'' ...Shit!\
1652'''Diabetus:''' Sorry.
1653[[/folder]]
1654

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