Line #32 Funny/Octopussy


1	* In one of the {{Narm}}iest moments of any Bond film, Bond's Franchise/{{Tarzan}} yodel.
2	* "Fill 'er up, please?"
3	* In a movie loaded with groaners, we get this gem:
4	-->'''Bond:''' I trust you can handle this contraption, Q.\
5	'''Q:''' It goes by hot air.\
6	'''Bond:''' Oh, then you can.
7	* Kamal and Gobinda getting in their car to escape an imminent nuclear explosion... [[MyCarHatesMe and the car doesn't start.]] They exchange priceless "Seriously?" looks.
8	** Before that, as Gobinda is guarding the bomb, a circus worker accidentally knocks its side with a boulder, making him nearly panic.
9	* Vijay reporting to bond about his tail of Kamal:
10	-->'''Vijay:''' I tailed him all the way to the tennis club this afternoon.\
11	'''Bond:''' Did you learn anything?\
12	'''Vijay:''' [[ComicallyMissingThePoint My backhand's improved.]][[note]]Being played a real-life ranked pro tennis player makes it an ActorAllusion.[[/note]]
13	* Q and Vijay waiting for Bond as he visits Octopussy's island lair:
14	-->'''Q''': 007 on an island populated exclusively by women? We won't see him 'til dawn!
15	* Vijay gets a few one-liners in of his own:
16	-->'''Bond''': Vijay! We've got company!\
17	'''Vijay''': [[CharacterCatchphrase No problem]]. This is a company car! (revs the tuk tuk for slow-speed chase)
18	* Bond sliding down the marble stairwell, realizes there's a rather painful-looking marble knob at the stop, and shoots the knob out of the way before he hits [[GroinAttack his marbles with it]]. Chuckle at the obviousness.
19	** What really sells it is the look on Bond's face.
20	* Bond says, "Hiss off!" to a large, menacing snake. ''The snake meekly complies.''
21	** Lets not forget the tiger. It sits!
22	*** FridgeBrilliance: He uses ''Kamal's'' voice and inflection - apparently, the tiger is one of Kamal's pets.
23	*** The confident tone and especially the way Bond pronounces 'sit' is a ShoutOut to pet training expert Barbara Woodhouse, who was a popular TV personality in Britain at the time.
24	* Bond's classy English way of saying, "I don't have time for this bullshit!"
25	-->'''Bond:''' (dressed as a circus performer) Where can I find the base commander? It's urgent.\
26	'''Guard:''' Let's see your circus pass.\
27	'''Bond:''' [[PrecisionFStrike Damn it, man!]] I said it's urgent!
28	* As Kamal and Gobinda are fleeing in a plane, they see Bond clinging to the wing, yanking the wires out of the engine.
29	-->'''Kamal:''' He'll kill us all! Go out, and get him.
30	-->'''Gobinda:''' [[ThisIsGonnaSuck Out there?]]
31	--> '''Kamal:''' '''GO!'''
32	--> '''Gobinda:''' ...Yes, Excellence.
33	* Bond's face at the new Bond Girl describing her octopus tattoo as "My little octopussy." One of the few times he responds to a sexual joke with complete ''bafflement.''
34	* After Bond wins backgammon against Kamal using his own fixed dice, letting ''everyone'' know [[CheatersNeverProsper Kamal's a dirty cheater]], Bond tells the British commander who complained "always a double six!" while playing him, "It's not ''really'' in the wrist" - referencing Kamal's claim of being able to roll them.
35	* Kamal enters Octopussy's room to tell her Bond has escaped...and Bond just strolls up behind him as Octopussy introduces him.
36	-->'''Bond''': An old friend of the family, you might say.
37	-->'''Kamal''': Indeed. You have a very nasty habit of surviving.
38	-->'''Bond:''' Well, you know what they say about the fittest.
39	* Bond hiding in a body bag supposedly containing one of Khan's mooks... and letting out a ''diabolical'' laugh as two mooks attempt to dump him away for tiger food. The mooks, apparently thinking they're dealing with a member of the undead, run away screaming.
40	* Ladies and gentlemen, the Angry Fakir!
41	-->'''Fakir:''' (''in Hindi, on spotting the dead mook'') ''GET OFF MY BED!''
42	* Bond looking positively repulsed when served ''stuffed sheep's head'', complete with its ''eyeballs''. We know it is not Gobinda's stare that causes Bond to "lose his appetite".
43	** Even more so when Kamal helps himself to an eyeball and eats it with no problem! Bond's baffled reaction says it all.
44	* While Bond is imprisoned in Khan's palace, he pauses on his way to bed to flirt with Magda, suggesting he could come in for a nightcap. Gobinda interposes and forcibly directs him to his room:
45	-->'''Bond:''' "I don't suppose ''you'd'' care for a night cap?"
46	* In an extremely tense moment, Bond has defused a nuclear bomb seconds before it goes off. After a few moments, Francisco the Fearless pops out of the cannon to wonder why he hasn't been fired from it yet: "Now???"
47	** The fact that the nuke is set to go off just as the cannon is scheduled to fire in the show's finale is a bit of BlackComedy; the circus is literally set to end with a bang, indeed...
48	* RealLife examples:
49	** During one take of Miss Moneypenny introducing Penelope Smallbone, Creator/LoisMaxwell accidentally said "Smallbush". This caused the crew to burst out laughing and Creator/RogerMoore quipped, "Well we know where ''your'' mind has been, Miss Moneypenny!"
50	** Vijay Amritaj recalled that the film opened in London two weeks before UsefulNotes/{{Wimbledon}} and a handful of tennis stars attended the premier.
51	--->When I died in the film, one of the players jumped up in the middle of the theatre and screamed, "I'm in, I'm in!"
52	** Special effects man John Richardson recalled a prank the crew played on Moore:
53	--->In the jungle, he was being chased by some baddies and a tiger was supposed to leap out and a snake crawl over his leg. I went to the prop room, as I knew they had a gorilla suit (well, what prop department wouldn't?), which I asked to borrow. I had a word with the first assistant director and his round the back, waiting for Roger to appear. As he hid on the ground peering through the bushes, I climbed on his back and tapped him on the shoulder. Roger's reaction as he looked over his shoulder was priceless and caused amusement all round.
54	*** And another one:
55	---->I was firing zirconium spark balls from an airgun around Roger, who stood at the back on the train. I had loaded up my capsule gun and we were just about to go for a take when Johnny the electrician appeared - he wore glasses like the bottom of milk bottles. I asked if I could borrow them, put them on and, looking like WesternAnimation/MrMagoo, waited for the shout of "Turn over!", before I called out, "Roger, can you wave your arm so I can see where you are?" I am afraid I cannot repeat his reply!

Context Funny / Octopussy