Line #26 Funny/Deadpool


1	%% Deadpool's subpages need to be clear and concise.
2	%% No first person outside of SelfDemonstrating/{{Deadpool}}.
3	%% So don't go putting ol' Wade's examples into first-person here, 'kay?!
4	%%
5
6	!This page contains unmarked spoilers. Administrivia/YouHaveBeenWarned!
7
8	!!Other ''Deadpool'' Funny pages
9	* See [[Funny/Deadpool2016 here]] for the film ''{{Film/Deadpool\|2016}}''
10	* See [[Funny/Deadpool2 here]] for the film ''Film/Deadpool2''
11	* See [[Funny/DeadpoolAndWolverine here]] for the film ''Film/DeadpoolAndWolverine''
12	* See [[Funny/Deadpool2013 here]] for the video game ''VideoGame/Deadpool2013''
13	* See [[Funny/CableAndDeadpool here]] for ''ComicBook/CableAndDeadpool''
14
15	!!''ComicBook/{{Deadpool}}'' comic books
16	----
17	* Special mention must be made of Deadpool Vol. 3 issue #11, in which he went back in time and ended up in ''Amazing Spider-Man'' #47. Deadpool and Blind Al take the places of Peter and May Parker. It doubled as a [=CMoA=] for artist Pete Woods, who pulled a Forrest Gump on ASM 47 and does a fantastic job of emulating John Romita.
18	-->'''Harry Osborn:''' What's the scam, hip cat? I thought I'd find you singin' with the squares!\
19	'''Deadpool:''' What?\
20	'''Harry Osborn:''' Hangin' with the hard cases--\
21	'''Deadpool:''''' Excuse'' me?\
22	'''Harry Osborn:''' Rappin' with the rubes--\
23	'''Deadpool:''' Are you having a ''stroke''? Speak English!
24	* Another notable moment is in an issue of Spider-Man in which Deadpool was hired to waylay him. Deadpool had paid extra for these sweet ComicBook/BlackestNight tie-in boots, and let that little nugget drop. None other than Geoff Johns endorsed Deadpool's plug. The Merc With The Mouth is money!
25	* One that's kinda a hybrid of Funny and Awesome comes in one of the Preludes to ''Deadpool Corps''. On a jungle island and faced with a bunch of murderous pirates, Deadpool gets shot by a ton of bullets, only to immediatly get back up. He then gets shot by [[MoreDakka even more bullets]], gets up again... and let them know that "Now I get to shoot you."
26	* "It was a routine assignment...". Cue Deadpool [[http://img294.imageshack.us/img294/1376/resizeofdeadpool34p11ca8.jpg garroting a guy in a Santa outfit with barbed wire.]]
27	* There was a team-up between Deadpool and Captain Britain where the two of them ended up switching cultures, so that Captain Britain ended up Canadian/American, and Deadpool ended up British. However, thanks to Deadpool's healing factor, Deadpool eventually became SUPA-BRITISH!!! All of the strengths of being British (honor, chivalry, a knightly attitude), with none of the weaknesses (like bad grammar, self-deprecating humor, [[BritishTeeth poor dentistry]]), except for the one where he couldn't finish off a downed and defenseless opponent.
28	* [[http://i.imgur.com/RONZd.jpg The Etiquette Lesson]]
29	* This exchange in ''Cable'':
30	-->'''Domino:''' Okay, what's the plan?
31	-->'''Cable:''' [[AttackAttackAttack Charge the citadel. Take out Stryfe. Get Hope back. That's the plan.]]
32	-->'''Deadpool:''' [[LeeroyJenkins AWESOME PLAN.]]
33	* Deadpool vs. Silver Sable.
34	* VideoGame/MarvelVsCapcom3 intro: Deadpool appears to be thumbing through a book which could possibly be the script for the game. When Deadpool's the team leader, he says: "Who was I supposed to kill again? Eh, doesn't matter!" If he loses, he says: "You pressed the wrong button!"
35	** When Deadpool triggers the good ol' X-Factor in ''Marvel vs. Capcom 3'': "Anime power up
36	** In [[http://www.eventhubs.com/news/2010/sep/16/seth-demos-mvc3s-easy-mode-alt-colors-available/ this demo]] of ''Marvel vs. Capcom 3'''s Simple Mode, Deadpool drops a [[YourMom "Yo Momma!"]] during his slide attack and when he defeats Viewtiful Joe in that same vid, he drops this: "I hear bullets taste just like chicken!"
37	** Aside from the fact that Deadpool's backwards walk is [[Music/MichaelJackson the Moonwalk]], his winquotes are also a bit of a riot. He even quote Yipes [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nTUYj_BOwx8 here]], albeit a slightly edited version of Yipes' original words (stupid [=ESRB=] rules). He also asks Capcom to [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8XLsfpkP-xs give him the cover]] of the next Street Fighter!
38	* "[[BigNo Noooooo!]] [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=zLCLRkYElAI#t=185 Thaaat waas myy faavoourite guuuun!!"]]
39	* Weasel luring Deadpool outside to fight by having the managers announce that the participants of a Bea Arthur lookalike contest are just arriving outside. Deadpool heads outside , only to see a gigantic suit of power armor. Deadpool's reaction? [[ComicallyMissingThePoint "This guy doesn't look ANYTHING like Bea Arthur!"]]
40	* In one Deadpool Team Up, Deadpool was paired up with ComicBook/MachineMan. The issue started with Deadpool working on [[AbnormalAmmo a gun that shoots rabid hamsters into people's faces.]] And things only get nuttier from there. The issue included the following, in no particular order: Machine Man bursting into Deadpool's not so secret anymore headquarters to make him pay the money he owes an insurance company for all the money he's cost them, Deadpool shooting Machine Man in the face with the previously mentioned Rabid Hamster Gun, Machine Man convincing Deadpool to work with him to take on a villain that was about to cost the insurance company in one day more than Deadpool has in all of his illustrious career, Deadpool and Machine Man causing more than a little property damage taking on a Puppet Master wannabe, Deadpool considering working with the Puppet Master, both of them picking on the wannabe for looking like a girl, Deadpool getting mind controlled and nearly eating a grenade, then Machine Man ruining Deadpool's fun by stopping the Puppet Master by [[BodyHorror remodeling one of the Puppet Master's puppets to work on him, causing one hostage unbearable agony in the process]], Deadpool throwing the puppet out the window, and finally, Deadpool using the Puppet Master's magic puppets to hold a rabid hamster dance party.
41	* [[http://www.funnyjunk.com/channel/deadpool/Deadpool+-+chicken/laDcGyn/ "The - chicken - said - peep!"]]
42	** Dub of that scene [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RKNZEoXE13s here.]]
43	* In one Deadpool Team-up, Deadpool {{Squee}}ing while getting pummled by The Mighty Thor.
44	* Deadpool {{Squee}}ing after getting to meet one of his idols [[Franchise/GIJoe STORM SHADOW]] [[http://www.the-gutters.com/comic/27-william-dean-blankenship-jr here]].
45	* Deadpool being teleported to A.I.M. headquarters. He decides his entry wasn't badass enough, so he poofs out and comes back again.
46	* [[http://scans-daily.dreamwidth.org/2575576.html In which]] Deadpool gets [[ComicBook/CaptainAmerica CAPTAIN AMERICA]] to [[ItMakesSenseInContext sit on his lap.]]
47	* Deadpool narrating his own life out loud in the first issue of Vol. 3, and using that as a distraction to take out the southern banana republic goons that were after him. Also, Deadpools wisecracks about the battle armor he bumps into. Also, the wisecracks he throw at Sasquatch during his fight with him. Also, his funeral plans as he shared them with Sasquatch. Aw, hell, the entire first issue of Vol. 3.
48	* Deadpool's fight with Taskmaster in the second issue of Vol. 3! Deadpool kicks his butt using his phat dance moves!
49	** "Notice the lateral movement as he easily evades this blow--" "Notice how I rearrange your face so that solid food is no longer an option--"
50	* [[http://www.dadsbigplan.com/images/uploads/2009/07/deadpool-12.jpg This]] Deadpool encounter with Bullseye.
51	* In a team-up with Wolverine, Deadpool got to wear one of Jean Grey's fabulous outfits to distract an evil robot. Whilst wearing his own costume under it.
52	* Deadpool performing a [[Franchise/StreetFighter Shoryuken]] punch on Kitty Pryde.
53	* Deadpool writing "Point this end at enemy" on his guns.
54	* One of Blind Al's best moments, in the issue where she's sabotaged all of Deadpool's weapons and told Weasel about it.
55	** Added: Deadpool proving to the B.A.D. Girls that he didn't have that one HoYay moment with Cable by dropping his pants in front of the girls, completely forgetting that he was wearing Silver Age Jean Grey girl panties at that time.
56	* Also, Deadpool arguing with himself ''within his own bio''.
57	* "'''Buuuuuulllllleeeeettttttsssss!!!!!!'''"
58	** [[http://asylums.insanejournal.com/scans_daily/234814.html#cutid1 The famous death trap wherein Deadpool break all his limbs AND KEEPS RIGHT ON TALKING.]]
59	* The time Deadpool challenged Captain America (or the EldritchAbomination who was squatting in his body) to a match of Rochambeau for the fate of the world.
60	* Pinned down in a meat freezer while fighting Bullseye, Deadpool needed to think of a way to keep Bullseye from killing him with arrows, when one of his voices tells him to "Be the meat". Out pops Deadpool in a makeshift armor made of frozen pork announcing, "I am the meat!"
61	** And then there's flashback showing that even as a child Deadpool always wanted to dress up in a meat suit and fight somebody.
62	** "He's beating our meat!" when Bullseye attacks the armor with a power saw.
63	** "Say it! SAY IT!" "GET YOUR MEATHOOKS OFFA ME!"
64	** "YEEEEEEAH!!! No." ''(Deadpool stab Bullseye with the meathook)''
65	* Vol. 4, issue #13 had Deadpool agree to rid a resort island of pirates, only if the girl he was talking to [[Manga/OnePiece would become his navigator]]... the blind girl.
66	** Then she ended up with Bob.
67	* Deadpool once bought a tug boat for the price of a nuclear sub and then sank it.
68	* When an AIM minion comments that he prefers the ''Franchise/StarWars'' prequels to the original trilogy, Deadpool blew his head off, pointed his gun at ''[[SuspiciouslySimilarSubstitute Bill]]'', and commanded him to shout, "JAR-JAR BINKS IS AN ABOMINATION!"
69	* In Vol. 4, issue #15, Deadpool starts talking to the shark he had just eaten most of while adrift at sea, has a crazy hallucination about being on a cruise with a bunch of heroes, asks his inner voice to confirm whether or not San Fransisco was being attacked by breakfast cereal mascots to see if he was still hallucinating, roller bladed around San Fransisco in a [[CampGay stereotypical]] outfit, and when he attempted to fit in, walked into a Navy bar still dressed like that (complete with HelloSailor and IsItHotInHere in an attempt to save face), and then ended up in a hostage situation in said bar. Then he joined the X-Men.
70	* Similar to the ''Manga/OnePiece'' navigator shout out above, in Deadpool's team-up with Iron Fist, Deadpool makes an even more blatant anime/manga reference (gotta hit you people over the head, doesn't he?). As the villain and his ninja mooks surrounded him:
71	-->'''Deadpool:''' I will make you and everyone in this village recognize me, for one day... [[Manga/{{Naruto}} I will be Hokage!]]\
72	'''Bystander:''' Does anything he says ever make any sense?
73	* In a more family-friendly retelling of the Weapon X story, Deadpool narrates and presents the team in a photo laid out like The Brady Bunch. Alice is still in the middle.
74	* When Deadpool insisted on calling every vampire "Dracula." Other characters get caught up in Deadpool's enthusiasm, and adopt the terminology. Even some of the vampires!
75	* From ''Deadpool Annual'' #2
76	-->''Super-bro code: Don't out a fellow super-bro.''
77	* For Marvel's 75th anniversary, Deadpool [[http://www.deadpoolbugle.com/p/marvels-75th-anniversary-deadpool.html photobombed]] the covers of various Marvel comics, as well as the poster for ''Film/{{The Avengers\|2012}}''.
78	* Deadpool once changed the sign on [[Comicbook/TheIncredibleHulk Bruce Banner's]] office door to "Men's Room".
79	* Creator/GailSimone sure got a lot of mileage out of using the {{Inherently Funny Word\|s}} "winkie" as a name for Deadpool's junk.
80	** When recovering from a tabula rasa state in an ''Agent X'' comic, the first thing Deadpool did when his memories started coming back? Strip down naked, and show off to both Alex and Sandi while proudly exclaiming, "Winkie! Found a winkie! Boingy boingy boingy boingy!" Needless to say, they didn't enjoy the sight.
81	** After Black Swan turned Deadpool back to normal (relatively speaking), then subsequently got killed by everyone, Deadpool got rather pissed at Alex when remembering when he was "...minding my own winkie in the bathtub, and Alex started beating on Deadpool's poor skull..."
82	** Then we have Gail's contribution to Deadpool's wedding issue, "Eulogy For a Winkie". Let's just say that when Deadpool married the super-strong Outlaw, he realized first-hand that she makes a very painful bedfellow...
83	* In ''ComicBook/RocketRaccoon'' Vol. 2 issue #5, Deadpool briefly appears in a campfire story Groot was telling some kids. While most of the people in the story just repeated "I am Groot!", Deadpool instead played poker with Rocket Raccoon. Then when Deadpool lost, he [[SoreLoser stabbed his cards with his katana.]] What's even funnier is that it's never explained how Deadpool got to space in the first place.
84	* There's a sequel to ''ComicBook/DeadpoolKillsTheMarvelUniverse'' simply titled ''Deadpool Kills the Marvel Universe Again''.
85	* In ''The Despicible Deadpool'' arc "The Marvel Universe kills Deadpool", Deadpool bought something from some GreenSkinnedSpaceBabe that he thought would give him some awesome powers so that he could have one last dance with every superhero that wanted to take him in ([[DeathSeeker or kill him, whatever worked]]). But instead, he made everyone around him puke like hell!
86	--> '''Deadpool:''' Great Odin's swollen prostate! It's like a Russian nesting doll of upchuck.
87	----
88	!!Other stuff
89	* [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ptKgRecPi1I This]] fan film, an affectionate parody of the ''WesternAnimation/BeautyAndTheBeast'' song ''Gaston'' staring Deadpool in the role of Gaston.

Context Funny / Deadpool