Line #19 Funny/Christian


1	* His and Wrestling/{{Edge\|Wrestler}}'s inclination to make up BuffySpeak-esque words at random like "stinktitude" and "awesomeness."
2	* His five-second poses with Wrestling/{{Edge\|Wrestler}} (and later, Wrestling/KurtAngle) in 2000.
3	-->'''[=Edge=]''': [[Memes/ProfessionalWrestling For the benefit of those with flash photography...]]
4	* During the time he was allied with Wrestling/ChrisJericho, Wrestling/TheDudleyBoys managed to steal their clothes, luggage, and Jeric--''[[LastSecondWordSwap Christian]]'s'' jar of Ass Cream ([[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ebfWgrxKkJI which had a hilariously giant label saying, yes, "ASS CREAM".]])
5	** For extra hilarity, Bubba Ray's ''absolute terror and disgust'' at the jar of Ass Cream. He looks equal parts horrified and confused as to what it even is.
6	--->'''Bubba Ray:''' What the ''HELL'' are you guys doing with ''Ass Cream''? What do you ''DO'' with Ass Cream, ''[[HoYay might I ask]]?''
7	** At the end of the promo, Spike steals their towels, and they quickly run backstage naked. They are briefly shown in silhouette behind the screen.
8	** A few months later, Wrestling/{{Goldust}} dressed as SantaClaus would give [=Christian=] a gift of new and improved ASS CREAM ([[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ef0LU449SXk with 35% more ass!]]). [=Christian=] would insist that it was Jericho's ASS CREAM until Goldust had walked out of the room. [=Christian=] would then sneak away with the jar of ASS CREAM like a kid trying to secretly borrow his dad's ''Magazine/{{Playboy}}'' magazine.
9	*** Of course, its first appearance (see above) had Jericho use a VerbalBackspace.
10	---->'''Jericho''': You think it's funny taking my... ''Christian's'' jar of Ass Cream out!?
11	** The jar of ASS CREAM has even made an appearance in ''The Edge and Christian Show That Totally Reeks of Awesomeness''!
12	** Even Wrestling/VinceMcMahon once used it in preparation for a new inductee into his Kiss My Ass Club.
13	* Towards the end of his WWE run, his character evolved into a SmallNameBigEgo who constantly talked his way into ridiculous situations, whilst his "Problem Solver" Tomko began playing the straight man to Christian's wackiness. [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MjVrYmK96O0 It. Was. Glorious.]]
14	--> '''[=Christian=]:''' Tomko, gimme a beat.
15	--> '''Tomko:''' No.
16	* His promo in TNA, where he responded to claims that he didn't "look like a World champion"... By dressing up as Wrestling/JeffJarrett.
17	** [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rHSm-azmqIA His first promo on Impact,]] where he makes fun of "The Alpha Male" Monty Brown's finisher.
18	--->'''Christian:''' I know your deal. I know you like to hurl your big body across the ring and [[HomoeroticSubtext pounce on men]]. [[NotThatTheresAnythingWrongWithThat Hey dude, whatever you do in your spare time, I'm not here to judge, that's your deal.]]
19	* His Road to Wrestlemania in Smackdown Vs. RAW 2011. All of it.
20	* Pretty much any segment with [[PowerTrio Christian's Coalition]].
21	* One of [=Christian=]'s early gimmicks was to throw all-out ''temper tantrums'' if things weren't going his way in the ring. [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uM4R4_xmBIw Just]] ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1-C61X3iyhA try]]'' [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L0nASqAsS2M watching]] [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7KdRWm8jRlc this]] without cracking up.
22	** One of his early solo programs was with Wrestling/DiamondDallasPage, who was his motivational coach. The tantrums got worse. And it gave us an absolutely hysterical example of TheUnSmile in the process.
23	--->'''DDP''': Okay Christian. You've been practicing for ''days''. This is the first step to the world of positive thinking. So - [[http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x7prs3_ddp-christian-backstage_sport?GK_FACEBOOK_OG_HTML5=1 lay it on me, baby!]] ''(Smiles genuinely)''\
24	'''Christian''': ''(TheUnSmile)''I feel like an idiot.
25	** He briefly threw one last tantrum in his last major program, a triple-threat with Chris Jericho and John Cena, before running off to TNA.
26	** These tantrums put him in the number 10 spot on the Network-exclusive ''[=WWE=] Countdown's'' list of Biggest Crybabies.
27	* Christian's return in 2009, while also being an awesome moment for those wanting to see it, was ''HI''-larious as he destroyed a very green Wrestling/JackSwagger, verbally demolishing him with two little words; ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5_Z3Rt6851w Thuffering Thuccotash]]''
28	* His second WHC title reign came about by taking advantage of the "title changes via DQ" stipulation and getting Wrestling/RandyOrton to [[GroinAttack kick him in the nuts]]
29	* Teasing Edge over his ImportantHaircut during his induction speech at 2012 Hall of Fame, by claiming it was "yet another example of Edge copying me" after his own ImportantHaircut years earlier, before asking [[SelfDeprecation if Edge was planning on shrinking a few inches & winning 9 less World titles]].
30	* On a night where Wrestling/ChrisJericho was an acting General Manager of ''Raw,'' he decided that Captain Charisma should, well, [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CTCWske0nOQ look the part.]] Christian's arguments with Tyson Tomko and Shelton Benjamin's laughter make it even better.
31	* During the first ''[=SmackDown=]'' of 2015 hosted by him and Wrestling/{{Edge\|Wrestler}}, he brought back some E&C lingo and called [[Wrestling/TheAuthority J&J Security]] "dorkchops".
32	** That same night, he and Edge [[http://peepulation.tumblr.com/post/106986040088/10-10-christian4peeps-edgeratedr-host vandalize the "Muscle and Fitness" cover featuring Triple H and Stephanie]].
33	* At ''[[Wrestling/WWEFastlane Fastlane 2016]]'', during the Cutting Edge Peep Show, he and Wrestling/{{Edge\|Wrestler}} are confronted by the League of Nations and declare that the ring is theirs, with Wrestling/{{Sheamus}} telling them to leave the ring. But E&C are not done yet.
34	-->'''Edge:''' You know, guys. We, uh, we were gonna give these people a 5-second pose tonight...but, you know, maybe you four should take that honor.
35	-->'''Christian:''' Right. So, for the benefit of those with flash photography...Cleveland, we give you...
36	-->'''Edge:''' ...the international house of dumbasses.
37	-->(Wrestling/TheNewDay jumps around while laughing)
38	-->'''Kofi:''' Hey, hey. [[Wrestling/WadeBarrett Bomber Wade]]. Bomber Wade. When we said "turn the other cheek", ''THIS'' is what we meant.
39	-->(Xavier Woods sits playing his trombone)
40	-->'''Christian:''' And right after Fastlane...right after Fastlane...Watch ({{beat}}) [[WebVideo/TheEdgeandChristianShow our show]]! Watch our show! Watch our show! Watch our show!
41	** For bonus points, he delivered his last line to the rhythm of The New Day's own "New Day rocks!"
42	* At [[Wrestling/AllEliteWrestling AEW]] [=WrestleDream=], Christian was seen watching the opening ceremony where Tony Khan greeted and gave flowers to the grandchildren on Wrestling/AntonioInoki, who had died nearly a year before to the day. In the post-event media scrum, Tony Khan asked why he was watching. Christian's response? [[AscendedMeme They lost their grandfather...]] in reference to his frequent reminders to other wrestlers that their own fathers were deceased.
43	** Same press conference also featured Christian rebuffing a question from The Wrestling Observer's Bryan Alvarez about seeing Nick Wayne wrestle by asking Bryan if he ever wrestled, then responding to an affirmative answer by saying "I'm sure you sucked." He also denied ever seeing Nick Wayne wrestle but determined that Nick has potential to be great simply because he sided with Christian and helped him secure the TNT Championship over Darby Allin in the main event. Aside from correctly referencing Alvarez's short and uneventful in-ring career, it also stands in complete contrast to Adam Copeland, who'd made his AEW debut in the post-match segment to Christian's victory over Allin, excitedly talking about all the future plans and possibilities for his tenure in AEW as well as candid behind-the-scenes details of how he got there.
44	* [[https://twitter.com/AEW/status/1760486805520920839?s=46&t=MVOhX-TWAoS04HWi-m25JQ Christian's promo against Daniel Garcia]] on the February 21, 2024 episode of ''AEW Dynamite''. It's the usual "dead father" banter, but it gets ''very'' personal, quick:
45	-->'''Christian:''' You didn't have so many happy memories, did you? Hey, I have a question for you: Do you know a Jackie Garcia that lives at 2 Baker Court in Buffalo, New York?[[note]]Bonus points: the specified address doesn't lead to Jackie's actual address, [[https://twitter.com/wrestleplug_/status/1760485783566192944?s=46&t=MVOhX-TWAoS04HWi-m25JQ but to a]] ''[[https://twitter.com/wrestleplug_/status/1760485783566192944?s=46&t=MVOhX-TWAoS04HWi-m25JQ cemetery]]''.[[/note]] And can you confirm to me that Jackie was married to David Garcia? And I understand that David Garcia is your father.... ''(long pause)'' [[WhamLine ....and your father is]] ''[[WhamLine dead]]''.

Context Funny / Christian