Follow TV Tropes

Following

Context Funny / ACertainMagicalIndex

Go To

1[[quoteright:350:https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/fukou_da_such_misfortune_to_aru_majutsu_no_index_fan_club_35246206_1280_720.jpg]]
2 [[caption-width-right:350:By the way, the characters above him read his {{Catchphrase}}.[[note]]"Fukou da/Such misfortune."[[/note]]]]
3
4[[foldercontrol]]
5
6[[folder:Season I (volumes 1-6)]]
7
8* [[RunningGag Basically anytime Index bites Touma out of irritation.]]
9* Index's clothes explode due to Touma's hand negating the magical protection bestowed by her robes. Made especially funny due to her very smug expression. Well, until she realizes what just happened.
10* When Touma learns about Misaka's ModestyShorts, she makes the most ''hilarious'' troll-face as she asks "Disappointed?"
11* Episode 8.
12-->'''Touma''': Just close your eyes, and then stick out your tongue.\
13'''Stiyl''': What?\
14'''Touma''': ''(sticks out his own tongue to demonstrate)'' See?\
15''[Stiyl closes his eyes and sticks his tongue out]''\
16'''Touma''': This is for using me as a decoy so your cowardly butt could run away! (''uppercuts him'')
17* Episode 9: Touma has been hospitalized -again- and the Doctor has some questions.
18-->'''Doctor''': You have been hospitalized two times in ten days. Say... do you have a nurse fetish?\
19'''Touma''': What are you talking about? Would I slice off my hand just for that?\
20'''Doctor''': A pity. *Sigh* And there I had hoped to find a compatriot.
21* When they are thinking of names for Misaka Imouto's cat.
22-->'''Misaka Imouto''': A cat named "Dog". Heh heh heh.
23** Misaka Imouto muttering about Touma, "What kind of guy throws a cat at someone?"
24* The end of episode 14. Touma wakes up in the hospital and Misaka Imouto has put his hand on her breasts.
25-->'''Touma''': I can't feel anything because of the anesthetic. [[CatchPhrase Such misfortune!]]
26* [[FreakyFridayFlip Episode 15]]. Touma's cousin became the ShockAndAwe girl, his mom became Index, the female inn manager became one of the many Misaka clones, the male inn manager became the PlayingWithFire guy. HilarityEnsues.
27** Don't forget the [[UsefulNotes/BarackObama U.S. president]] becomes Kuroko. '''YES WE CAN'''!
28** And Index becomes one of Touma's male schoolmates...[[FanDisservice who eventually ends up wearing Index's one-piece swimsuit.]]
29** Touma freaking out over this eventually leads to him being bound in a straight jacket and wearing a [[Film/TheSilenceOfTheLambs Hannibal Lecter mask.]]
30** Not to mention before that Index and Touma accidentally watch a porno. You only see their reactions and the tail-end of the show, but it's hilarious nonetheless.
31** Index claims she found a really cute hat on the beach, right before plopping a jellyfish onto Touma's face.
32** Touma runs into a girl in a bizarre outfit, [[spoiler:and comes to the conclusion that she must be someone he knows pre-amnesia, since he apparently knows all sorts of weirdos in strange outfits.]]
33** Then Kaori appears... and she looks like the PlayingWithFire guy to everyone but Touma. It only takes a couple of hours for her to be completely fed-up.
34*** She then asks Touma to keep watch while she goes to the men's bath, since her "appearance" makes it impossible to use the women's bath. Then, Toya comes by and brings Touma in to take a bath. HilarityEnsues.
35*** This incident gets brought up in later Amakusa apperances: apparently, it makes Touma the first man to see Kaori naked and ''live''.
36** Touma cockblocking his own father by bursting into the room when his parents were about to have sex ([[NoYay though that was because his mother looked like Index of all people which what no one else seemed to realize means she looked like 10]]). Touma's mother is delighted and suggests they sleep together as a family, while Touma's father growls.
37* This ArsonMurderAndJaywalking scene after everyone gets their own "identities" back from the FreakyFridayFlip incident from Episode 15 to 17:
38-->'''Touma:''' Oh, hey, Index. Is something wrong? Why are you just peeking around the wall like that?\
39'''Index:''' Yeah, something's wrong. You strangled me with your bare hands. At the beach, you buried me in the sand up to my neck!\
40'''Touma:''' Um, I promise I had a good reason for doing all of that...\
41'''Index:''' Then you nearly smushed me to death behind a door!\
42'''Touma:''' No fair! That one wasn't me!\
43'''Index:''' I was on the floor in pain and you just ignored me!!\
44'''Touma:''' ''[chuckles nervously]'' Yeah, I guess that one ''was'' me. ''[Index gets in his face]'' [[OhCrap I mean-! Well, you see...]]\
45'''Index:''' RRAAAAAAGH!!!! ''([[RunningGag CHOMPS Touma]])''\
46'''Touma:''' AAAAAAGH!! [[CatchPhrase DAMN MY LUCK!!]]
47* Misaka's desperation to be rid of Mitsuki Unabara causes her to try to shake him off by dragging Touma, who happens to be walking by the Tokiwadai student dorms, off to lunch to pretend to be her boyfriend. This not only is hilarious for her [[LuminescentBlush repeated blushes of having to maintain the facade]], but she forgot a critical detail: they are in front of the dorms, where she, TheAce of Tokiwadai is clearly visible interacting cutesy with a guy and she has just tossed her reputation under the bus as she can only weep at her fractured reputation.
48* Last Order is pretty funny in general, but her introductory episode is particularly hilarious, especially when Accelerator trolls her. She asks him which apartment is his, but he gives her the wrong number, and she barges in on the occupants, much to her embarrassment. Despite being annoyed at him, she asks him for the apartment number again, and he does the same thing, and she falls for it ''again.''
49* Ouma Yamisaka makes a dramatic entrance, trashing the restaurant Touma and Index were eating at. [[SkewedPriorities Touma angrily rants at Ouma for shredding his homework with his attack.]]
50** When Ouma kidnaps Index, Touma tells their pet cat Sphynx to lead him to them. Sphynx quickly gets distracted by food, causing Touma to rant that it is stupid and ungrateful to Index.
51* Episode 22: Index meets Mikoto. Their combined reactions are '''priceless'''.
52-->'''Index:''' Explain, Touma, exactly who are these crass girls and why are they here? Do you know them?\
53'''Mikoto:''' Um, Excuse me? Just who the hell do you think you are? Saying something like that to people you've never meet?\
54'''Index:''' Admit it, I'm right. You do know Touma, don't you? So what exactly is your relationship with him?\
55'''Mikoto:''' ''[blushing]'' [[{{Tsundere}} What? What relationship?]] How 'bout you start by telling me who you are?\
56'''Index:''' Oh, well, uh, I kinda owe my life to him and stuff.\
57'''Mikoto:''' Oh, really? Don't tell me he came to your rescue without asking if you needed him to.\
58''[Index nods. Both FaceFault]''\
59'''Both:''' TOUMA!/IDIOT!!!
60* Touma's dad flirting with Oriana Thompson and Mikoto's mom, followed by Touma's mom scaring the crap out of him with her [[ClingyJealousGirl jealousy]].
61-->'''Touma's mom''': Touya-san, you're doing it ''again''!
62* Misaka Mikoto's mother not-so-subtly implying that she should eat a lot if she wants large breasts.
63--> '''Touma''': (glancing at [[ACupAngst In]][[BigEater dex]]) "Eat a lot and get bigger", huh?\
64'''Index''': (DeathGlare) Touma!
65
66[[/folder]]
67
68[[folder:Season II (volumes 7-13)]]
69
70* The ending of Season II: Episode 8. Pretty much all of it. In order: Touma walks in on Komoe stripping Index and dressing her in a cheerleader uniform. Index attempts her flying face-bite and ends up KISSING him. Then Fukiyose happens in and beats Touma up. She leads him around like the henpecked dork he is and they have an AlmostKiss, immediately followed up by Fukiyose headbutting him... resulting in him [[FunbagAirbag face faulting]] into Oriana's massive tits.
71--> '''Oriana''': To repay for hitting you... would you like a kiss?\
72 '''Touma''': Yes! I would like a kiss!
73** Fukiyose then gives him a quick MegatonPunch to the face.
74* Episode 9 of Season II: Mikoto gets ''so'' red from embarrassment, Touma assumes she ''must'' be being attacked by a spell.
75* Episode 14 of Season II: When Touma was helping Orsola move by looking for newspapers, he finds two doors. He knows that there is a bathroom behind one of them. Straining his hearing, he identifies the shower as the one on the left, so he opens the right door. To find a naked Orsola. While decrying his fate, a nude Index appears from the left door. [[FailureIsTheOnlyOption Both doors were bathrooms.]]
76--> '''Touma''': "THE RIGHT SIDE IS THE BATHROOM, THE LEFT SIDE IS ALSO ANOTHER BATHROOOOOOM!?!?!? ARE YOU KIDDING ME!!! THIS IS JUST HELL WAITING FOR ME ON BOTH SIDES!!!! ABSOLUTELY RIDICULOUS!!!! WHY ARE THERE TWO BATHROOMS IN THIS HOUSE!?!?!?"
77** Not to mention his reaction after he first opens the door: "As I saw what was in front of me, I had a thought: why didn't I just think I should've knocked?"
78** A bit later, when they're saying their goodbyes, Touma asks Orsola if she would like to join him and Index. He means "touring the city", but [[CovertPervert she interprets it as "join us in our hotel room to do naughty things"]]. The way she wriggles about, [[NaughtyNuns clearly tempted by the offer despite it not being proper]], is hilarious.
79** Touma explaining how he got to dance with Mikoto... [[MomentKiller until Kuroko]] [[DynamicEntry dropkicked him in the back of the head]].
80* Episode 15 of Season II:
81** Touma's [[AntiMagic Imagine Breaker]] destroying the clothes of Agnese, Lucia, and Angeline. The latter two while he was asleep. [[ButtMonkey He still gets blamed.]]
82** Angeline flipping Lucia's skirt.
83** Touma falling on Itsuwa, with her friends yelling, [[ShipperOnDeck "Now's your chance! Go for it!"]].
84*** The Amukusa Catholics are in awe of Touma because he's apparently the only man in history to have seen Kaori Kanzaki naked and ''lived''.
85* Episode 17 of Season 2, three of the Misaka Sisters realize that a fourth is not so identical upon learning she's taken up reading diet magazines and has lost weight.
86-->[[OhCrap Misaka will obey the prompting of her danger sense and run away now.]]
87* When Accelerator and Last Order meet Komoe-sensei for the first time, their reaction is to basically ask, "What the hell is [[ItIsDehumanizing this thing]]?" and discuss her as if she is not in the room, annoying her greatly.
88** Later in the episode, much like Touma does [[RunningGag on a regular basis]], Accelerator ends up [[ShowerOfAwkward accidentally walking in on Kikyou, Aiho, and Last Order in the bath]]. ''[[RunningGagged Unlike Touma]]'', Accelerator scolds them on forgetting to lock the bathroom door, and Kikyou and Aiho agrees with him.
89* Priceless - When Accelerator and Last Order move into Aiho's apartment in the novels, Accelerator had to give Last Order a bath. [[http://www.baka-tsuki.org/project/images/3/31/Index_v08_006.jpg Complete with colour illustration.]]
90--> Apparently he got soap in his eyes. Last Order milks it for all it's worth.
91* The washing machine scene from Episode 18 of Index II. Never has [[TooIncompetentToOperateABlanket failing to work a washing machine]] looked so {{Moe}}. Bonus points for Kanzaki freaking out over it.
92** [[BrickJoke During the end-of-season sequence,]] Kanzaki is seen standing over the washing machine. Note that ''she had no other appearances in the meantime''.
93** In the same episode, Mikoto and Touma's 'WTF' reaction to Last Order running away with 10032's goggles. [[DisproportionateRetribution Whom calmly pulls out her assault rifle while running after her.]]
94*** The scene with the theft has the highest concentration of the Sisters' verbal tic in the series:
95-->'''Misaka 10032:''' "This Misaka is this Misaka and that Misaka is that Misaka" says Misaka as she advises Misaka to give up the attempt.
96* Episode 21 of Season 2, this scene:
97-->'''Amata Kihara''': That Aleister is out of this world. You claim to be a scientist, yet you reject science? What kind of scientist is that? ''(to his mooks)'' Did you guys notice the Bible has become a pop-up book? ''({{Beat}})'' What are you guys staring at? ''(turns around, sees Accelerator [[SuperWindowJump diving at the window]])'' [[OhCrap Oh, shit!]]
98* Episode 23 of Season 2, Tsuchimikado and Touma are discussing the impending war in Academy City, and then comes one of the funniest {{Mood Whiplash}}es ever.
99--> [Tsuchimikado is telling Touma that this isn't his fault, that the scale of war will be different from everything else they've faced before, etc.]\
100 '''Touma:''' Tsuchimikado, I've made up my mind.\
101 '''Tsuchimikado:''' Kami-yan...\
102 '''Touma:''' Yes, I'm... I'm going to start studying English!
103* Episode 24 of Season 2, the drunk Mikoto's mom flirting with Touma and Accelerator.
104
105[[/folder]]
106
107[[folder:Season III (volumes 14-22)]]
108
109* In Volume 14, Misaka's pissed that Touma's cell phone treated an e-mail she sent as spam. While looking through Touma's "Recieved Mail" folder to confirm that Touma isn't lying, she learns something else: Touma has her mother's phone number! When Mikoto calls her mother (using Touma's phone!), her mother tells her that she must have been drunk that night and doesn't remember the details. Mikoto calmly hangs up, returns Touma's phone, and asks Touma the following:
110--> '''Misaka''': What the hell were you doing with my mother while she was druuuuuuuunk?!
111* Also in Volume 14, Touma is taken by Tsuchimikado to France in order to deal with the C-Document affair. How do they get there? By taking a supersonic plane. Unfortunately in order to avoid giving away their intentions, Tsuchimikado opens the plane's luggage hatch and boots Touma out with a parachute before jumping out himself. The illustration for the scene is absolutely [[http://www.baka-tsuki.org/project/images/6/69/Index_v14_131.jpg priceless]].
112* In Volume 16, right before all the action that happened, we had a series of hilarious things going on.
113-->Because of Touma, the class was about to miss lunch. The Delta Trio and Fukiyose had to run out of school to buy lunch, but it was illegal for them to do so. Being chased by a teacher, Tsuchimikado then offered Aogami Pierce as a sacrifice by using him as a step to get over the school fence!\
114Then Itsuwa, who was acting as Touma's bodyguard, found that he was chased by the same teacher, and immediately went to fight said teacher with her spear [[spoiler:after mistaking him for Acqua of the Back]].\
115Then after that, Itsuwa and Touma were walking together after school, getting all flustered. The Amakusa were stalking them, and to add some spice to their relationship, Tatemiya kicked a football that [[spoiler:landed on Touma's head and pushed him into Itsuwa's breasts. With Mikoto watching too!]]\
116Then Itsuwa wins Index over with her cooking, and Maika was so amazed by her cooking that she ''THREW'' the dinner she cooked for Tsuchimikado in angst.\
117Then Itsuwa, Index and Mikoto met each other in the hot springs. Mikoto was thinking about Touma until she fainted from heatstroke.
118* At the end of volume 16, [[spoiler:Kanzaki Kaori in a "ero fallen angel outfit".]]
119* In Volume 17, Index is amazed at how warm the and comfy the kotatsu is and sticks her head under for a peek. Just as she does this Touma farts inside of it. Needless to say Index was not amused.
120* In Volume 17, Tatemiya plays a prank on Itsuwa's crush on Touma, only to be rewarded with [[FlippingTheTable a tea table in the face]].
121* In Volume 17, Touma [[TheCallKnowsWhereYouLive pays a visit]] to England for a strategy meeting with the Queen of England. While being toured around the castle, the second princess, Carissa, notices that Touma is fooling around with his phone and asks for a photo. Soon, the two other princesses notice and try to join in, but are cut off by Queen Elizard:
122--> '''Queen Elizard''': What do you think you're doing?\
123 ''(the Knight Leader and Kanzaki nod in agreement)''\
124 '''Queen Elizard''': This is England, the nation of the Queen! Why are you taking pictures leaving out the leading part?!\
125 '''Knight Leader''': Ah, you fool! Don't show off your unrestrained love of festivities in front of someone from another country!! This is a strategy meeting!!\
126 ''(the queen rushes over to Touma, but the Knight Leader tackles her)''\
127 ''(Touma takes a picture with Carissa and her sisters, at their insistence)''\
128 '''Queen Elizard''': ''(shocked)'' Ah! You took it!! You really took it without me!! You can redo it! How about you take another one with me in it!?
129* In Volume 18, Agnese hits one of the knights with a ''GroinAttack''.
130** What was even funnier was the dominatrix mode she went into on the knight after said attack. Heck, she even threatened that she would [[AssShove shove her staff up his ass]], for crying out loud!
131** Before the final battle Tatemiya reveals he used the confusion of the coup d'etat to get an erotic costume for Itsuwa. Just as Kanzaki is feeling thankful her embarrassing costumes were most likely destroyed Tatemiya mentions he was sure to save Kanzaki's Fallen Angel Maid costumes both regular and 'ero'.
132* Season III episode 18:
133** The framing is actually kind of sad, maybe even a little nightmarish, but the fact that Shiage decides to hold up a liquor store only to find ''people are already robbing it'' is hilarious. Touma's not the only protagonist with bad luck, it seems.
134** Lessar keeps trying to seduce Touma, and looks like he can't figure out whether to laugh or cry.
135--->'''Lessar:''' What's wrong with you!? You should just do what any man would and jump me already!\
136'''Touma:''' I don't think there's anyone on the planet who would blame me if I slugged you for what you just said.
137** Lessar wonders about the Gekota phone strap Touma has. Touma explains he doesn't know much about it, and Lessar mocks him. Touma points out that maybe they shouldn't have this conversation ''while soldiers are pointing guns at them''.
138** Accelerator walks around a battlefield carrying a sleeping Last Order under his arm like she's a suitcase.
139* Episode 20:
140** Carissa tests her knights by pretending to be a helpless damsel. They all immediately jump to her defense.
141--->'''Carissa:''' Oh no, someone help! I'm afraid France will capture me and violate me!\
142'''Knights:''' ''[roar and beat back the enemy]''\
143'''Carissa:''' Why were none of you fighting this hard before?
144** Knight Leader immediately gets on the phone, asking to talk to the Queen so he can get permission to punish Carissa.
145--->'''Carissa:''' Hey, you know my mother! She'll definitely give you all of Curtana Second's power just so you can punish me!
146
147[[/folder]]
148
149[[folder:New Testament]]
150
151* New Testament Volume 1: [[spoiler:Touma makes his [[BigDamnHeroes triumphant]] [[HesBack return]], saving Shiage, Accelerator, and Fremea.]] His awesome return is cut short when Levinia Birdway out of nowhere [[GroinAttack kicks him in the nuts]].
152* New Testament Volume 2: Shiage gets Touma drunk. HilarityEnsues.
153** [[spoiler:The drunken Touma managing to accumulate a large number of girls on his way home. From the descriptions you can work out that these girls are Himegami Aisa, Tsukuyomi Komoe, Fukiyose Seiri, Musujime Awaki, Kazakiri Hyouka and Kumokawa Seiria. And in every case the text, which is from Misaka's perspective, mentions how big their breasts are.]]
154** [[spoiler:Kuroyoru Umidoru goes on a rant about Touma taking villains too lightly and fires a Bomber Lance at Touma when she tries to escape. His response, which completely undermined her very belief and existence, before moving past the subject: "Yes, yes, and here's Imagine Breaker."]] By the way, that's his ACTUAL LINE.
155** The entire volume is one long string of funny moments interspaced with exposition and the occasional serious note. [[spoiler:Drunken Touma calling Misaka ''Miko-chan'', drunken Touma collecting about a dozen girls as he stumbles home, inciting the awe of Shiage, and the admiration of Accelerator for being able to balance both a normal life and a life of fighting. The above bit with Umidoru, compounded by Touma asking her if she has cat-ears and Misaka Worst finding some and threatening to put them on her. Last Order and Worst in sync upon feeling as though their place by Accelerator is being threatened by Fremea. The members of ITEM meeting Fremea. Birdway arguing with Fremea, and finally Lessar's reaction to finding out Touma has returned to Academy City.]]
156* New Testament Vol 3 continues to incite laughter, Worst [[TheGadfly teasing]] Umidoru so much she ''breaks down and starts to cry''.
157** Worst continues her trend of trolling everybody when she meets Misaka Mikoto, first attacking her for her borderline stalker tendencies (buying a couples pair ring when they aren't even going out) and then moving on to attack her true weakness.
158-->'''Worst''': What's the point of an original if she loses to the clone in so many ways?\
159'''Mikoto''': [[BerserkButton …Are you talking]] [[ACupAngst about breast size…?]]\
160'''Worst''': Oh, Misaka never said that. [[BreakingTheFourthWall Maybe she was talking about number of appearances.]]\
161'''Mikoto''': Now you've said it!
162** Misaka gets love advice from the president and a little girl (the 8 year old parroting something he'd told her before). The little girl tells her to take off her bra in front of Touma and embrace him before he has a chance to react, while the president tells her to embrace him while wearing a string bikini and then untie it to send the message across. Bonus points for doing it nearby a Love Hotel. Misaka's reaction is to threaten to smack Robert Katze.
163* New Testament Vol 5: Touma thinks that Mikoto is [[GenderBender Thor]] in disguise (to be fair, Thor fooled him by shape-shifting into Mikoto earlier), so he touches her chest with Imagine Breaker to destroy what he thought was a magical disguise. Mikoto is so shocked and embarrassed that Touma is able to leave before she snaps out of it.
164** Shiage and Saiai force Fremea and Umidori to go to the dentist.
165** [[spoiler:Ollerus]] appears in front of Touma with a lot of really, really good information. Touma rushes past him full tilt with a shopping cart while this conversation takes place:
166-->'''[[spoiler:Ollerus]]:''' W-wait!! I thought this was a serious scene! Wouldn't you normally jump at the chance to learn about Imagine Breaker's identity? Why aren't you? Are kids these days really this dry? Waaaiiitt!!\
167'''Touma:''' Shut up!! I'm afraid of what'll happen if I don't get this food! They already think I skipped out on the preparations up until now, so I can't just disappear after heading out to buy them lunch!! I'd end up with more than just a few bruises then!!
168* New Testament Vol 6: What does it take to get Mikoto to join [[spoiler:Thor]] in facing off with a [[spoiler:Saint]]? He tells her that Touma's being taken care of by another woman.
169-->'''[[spoiler:Thor]]''': I happen to have a photo of your friend Kamijou Touma-kun doing his usual thing by being nursed to health by some mysterious little blonde girl. What do you think about that?\
170'''Mikoto''': [[ClingyJealousGirl Tell me right this instant where he is.]]
171** At the end, Touma comes home and tells Index, "I'm back, baby." Index bites him.
172* New Testament Vol 7:
173** Touma [[WakingUpElsewhere wakes up in a dark room]]. He forces his way out... and finds himself in the girl's locker room of a prestigious academy in the School Garden! HilarityEnsues as he fights for survival and tries to escape the enraged girls.
174** Umidori finds Fraulein Kreutune muttering in her sleep about dreams being tasty. Umidori goes WTF? and walks away.
175** Later on Touma sees two heroes, a bunny girl wearing a paper bag on her head and a stage performer dueling over the right to rescue Fremea. He just backs away.
176** The Tokiwadai Level 5s team up to track down Touma and find out what he was up to. For a very limited value of team up.
177** The Agitate Halation effect brainwashes a bunch of people into starting a riot. Gunha shows up and is not affected, but as usual, he has no idea what is going on and attacks the people for damaging trees.
178* New Testament Vol. 8:
179** Touma wakes up to [[BedmateReveal find Birdway and Lessar sleeping next to him]] in the [[AnOddPlaceToSleep bathtub]]. Of course, he gets bitten by a furious Index, and he finds that the girls broke a massive hole in his wall. He's horrified and wonders how in the world he will be able to pay for the damage.
180** The world leaders have a meeting. President Roberto Katze annoys everyone by loudly munching on a hotdog and reading a dirty magazine in front of everyone. He hits on Kaori Kanzaki and wonders why the Secret Service couldn't be made of hot, strong women like her instead of boring, muscular guys. His secretary angrily tells him to put his RagingStiffie away. Later, he asks Queen Elizard to introduce him to her daughter. Annoyed, she tells him to just sit in the corner and use his hand.
181** Both Mikoto and Misaki (via a mind controlled pawn) come upon Touma sitting on a bench with Birdway on his lap and Lessar and Index next to him. When Misaki declares she'll find out what's going on with Touma by swarming him with assorted females, Mikoto decides this will probably end with him taking every single one of them and probably also Misaki herself home, and prevents that by picking up the bench with her electromagnetism and pulling it towards her, crossing a river in the process. Touma noted that the experience reminded him of the famous bicycle scene from ''Film/ETTheExtraTerrestrial''.
182** Touma's group is trying to decide where to shop. Touma proposes they put it to a vote. Birdway gloats that she will obviously win because she has Dawn-Colored Sunlight backing her up. She texts them and asks them to vote for her. Mark Space texts back, "We don't have time for this nonsense. Have some sense." Birdway goes into a minor HeroicBSOD, fails to vote and loses 3-1.
183** Touma is horrified that the girls are dragging him along swimsuit shopping because he [[UnprovokedPervertPayback knows how this will inevitably turn out.]] So he gets smart and starts planning, in quite a bit of detail, how to avoid the changing rooms like the plague and just hang out unobtrusively in a corner of the store.
184** Mikoto picks out a modest one-piece swimsuit and asks Touma if he likes it. He's indifferent, and she gets upset, causing the swimsuit to jostle in her hand. The jostling caused the swimsuit to become a skimpy two piece, with Mikoto going into shock as she didn't realize the suit was designed to do that.
185** Lessar orders Touma to help her decide which of two swimsuits to buy, one that is just [[BarelyThereSwimwear a bunch of wires]] and a one-piece that turns transparent when wet. Touma [[TakeAThirdOption orders her to wear them at the same time, because the combination actually looks modest]]. Lessar gets shocked that he was able to beat her seduction plan and he gloats, but Index, Birdway, and Mikoto walk in and catch him holding the swimsuits. They assume he's into crossdressing and say there's nothing wrong with that, while Touma frantically tries to explain that it's NotWhatItLooksLike.
186** Touma is trying to carry an unconscious pregnant woman to safety, only for Index, Mikoto, and the others to assume he's bagged yet another girl for the UnwantedHarem. Touma indignantly says it is not even remotely like that.
187* New Testament Vol. 9: While this story is mostly unfunny, there's the scene where Othinus taunts Touma while riding a sedgeway, for just how surreal it is.
188* In the Necessarius Side Story, the Amakusas are trying to figure out where to hold a strategy meeting. Their first choice is entirely filled with one member's golf clubs. Their second choice is filled with pinup magazines. Their third choice is where they're storing cosplay outfits for Itsuwa, who threatens to burn them.
189* New Testament Vol. 10:
190** Touma [[DidntThinkThisThrough has no plan]] to escape Sargasso, and Othinus gets pissed at such foolishness.
191** Touma calls Othinus "Othi-chan" and she gets mad at his flippancy, which is funny on its own but the real kicker is him explaining his reasoning behind dropping the last part of her name because of how it sounds. Hint: [[UranusIsShowing a certain planet]] has a similar problem.
192** Othinus teleports Touma and herself to Denmark, where he discovers that the current temperature is well below the freezing point. He walks to a nearby man and tries to convince him of trading his Japanese currency for some warmer clothes. Soon enough Touma dejectedly returns to Othinus' side and this exchange happens:
193--->'''Othinus:''' What did he say?\
194'''Touma:''' He said [[MakeOutKids acting out in your youth is fine]], but this winter is too cold so we should stick to [[AutoErotica car sex]] if we want to let loose outdoors.\
195'''Othinus:''' I-I'm going to destroy this world!!!!\
196'''Touma:''' ''*physically restrains an angry Magic God, unexpectedly gains some warmth from the contact*''
197** The 7 Level 5s are all sent an e-mail telling them to kill Touma and Othinus. Naturally, Accelerator (who replies, "What the hell is this? What is that piece of shit doing?"), Beetle 05, Mikoto, and Misaki refuse. Mugino refuses saying it would be too difficult and expensive. The [[TheGhost Number 6]] just toys with the phone without saying anything. Gunha refuses saying that the e-mail had no guts.
198** After running into a statue of the male Norse deity Odin, Touma goes YouHaveGotToBeKiddingMe because it obviously doesn't resemble the beautiful Othinus at all.
199** Touma asks Othinus if she can jump onto a moving truck. She boasts that as the God of War, this would be child's play, then he dryly asks if she can still do it now that her powers have faded. She clams up.
200** Touma thanks Agnese for helping him and Othinus escape, then foolishly remarks, "Sorry that I looked up your skirt earlier." Naturally, she gets pissed.
201** Touma constantly getting annoyed by the exchange rate between yen and Danish Krone, forcing him to burn through his money for supposedly cheap things.
202** Touma needs to shut down Index to prevent a potentially world-ending spell from going off. He tries to cover her mouth but misses, but still manages to touch her, in a place she didn't like, causing her to scream and cutting off the spell. In other words, Touma just saved the world by [[AccidentalPervert accidentally groping Index's chest]].
203* New Testament Vol. 11:
204** During Touma and Misaki's first real meeting, he rather tactlessly told her he could see up her skirt, and even described her panties (spiderweb pattern). Instead of correcting her body's position, she tried to erase his memories, but of course it doesn't work. She frantically tries it over and over again, but he didn't even notice. He also comments on her (at the time) small chest, much to her irritation.
205** During an event where the underground mall is partially flooded so you can swim through it, Misaki puts on a swimsuit and goes there because she is too proud to admit she can't swim. She falls in the water and starts flopping around, until Touma tells her to StopDrowningAndStandUp, since the water in that spot is less than a meter deep. She spent the rest of the event clinging to his arm.
206** Seria Kumokawa gave Touma an obviously fake kit on hypnotism. He tries it on Misaki, who decides to play along when it has no effect. Touma, following the instructions, innocently starts telling her to do naughty things like lift her skirt, completely oblivious to Misaki's distress and the fact Seria obviously pranked him.
207** Touma and Misaki were attacked by an esper-hating gang called Deadlock, who ride around on rocket-powered roller skates. Touma chucks one of Misaki's remotes at a Deadlock member's head, causing him to crash. Then the skates [[EveryCarIsAPinto explode]]. Touma and Misaki go YouHaveGotToBeKiddingMe, and wonder at the skates' shoddy construction. Touma points out to the gang that one of their members just got blown up and asks if they care. They don't.
208* During the Mark Space side story published in the SP volume, Mark has to think of a way to convince Patricia Birdway to leave the Blue Research while keeping her [[LockedOutOfTheLoop unaware of magic]]. When he claims that Leivinia collapsed and is in the hospital Patricia replies that she can take care of herself, so Mark invents a story in which [[ACupAngst Leivinia used a Ultra Huge Breasts Cream Set on herself]] but ended up with huge areolae, then tried an Academy City breast enhancement device that turned them a bluish-purple colour, then suffered various other effects which ended with a bust size of over 5 metres and eight nipples. Just as he comments that they looked something like Gatling guns, Mark is overwhelmed by killing intent and it occurs to him that Leivinia may have been keeping an eye on him...
209* New Testament Vol. 12:
210** The boy impersonating the sixth Level 5 meets Touma and tries to intimidate him by introducing himself as "Aihana Etsu, a Level 5!" This proclamation has cowed almost everyone else he's met. But he's completely baffled (and more than a bit terrified) when Touma isn't fazed and responds "Oh, you're another one of them, eh? Do you know Accelerator or Misaka?" To someone who has not only encountered the other Level 5s (and, if certain theories are true, has met ''all'' of them), but fought with and/or against most of them, meeting yet another one doesn't count as anything special.
211** Further hilarity when Touma casually introduces himself in response. The boy ''freaks out'', because tales of Touma's exploits have reached even the street gangs of Academy City, and they are all ''terrified'' of him. The rumors also say that Kamijou Touma has a reputation for instantly making every girl he meets fall in love with him, which causes Touma to have a minor breakdown of his own.
212** Othinus has apparently spent most of her time in Touma's apartment being chased by Sphinx (who then delivers her to Index, proud of its "kill"). The image of the once-almighty Magic God being hunted and played with by a kitten is simply priceless. She sees a dollhouse on TV and immediately demands that Touma buy it for her to give her some shelter.
213** Touma sees that the luxury dollhouse that Othinus wants is only available in the Dianoid, a landmark for the rich and famous which supposedly has every single part of its structure made of diamond. Furthermore, its Christmas season, so the Dianoid is going to be filled with couples. One single weary thought crosses his head.
214--->'''[[PerpetualPoverty Touma]]:''' If I set foot in there, I’ll die. My bad mood would kill me.
215* New Testament Vol. 13:
216** Touma receives what it looks like a love letter, asking him to come to the roof of his school. He's ecstasic at the occasion and promptly races to the roof. Once he gets there he finds the High Priest (a mummified old buddhist priest) waiting up for him, who cheerfully asks him if he has received his letter. It takes everything Touma has to not inmediately break down, which only gets worse as the High Priest introduced himself as a Magic God. The first things to come out of Touma's mouth are that [[YouAreWorthHell he's not going in a hundred billion hell with him or making an enemy of the world for him]], with High Priest musing that maybe Niang-Niang or Nephthys would have been better suited at dealing with a teenage boy.
217** In general, the High Priest is a surprisingly funny villain. First he starts talking with Touma about a recurrent mob character from his class that has appeared in the background of several illustrations of the series, saying she's actually an existence known as an Observer who has the duty of observing Touma, just before revealing he's kidding just as Touma is getting into the discussion. When he's chasing Touma and Mikoto, who are fleeing in a high-tech AC electrical bike, he doesn't bother to use any great powers. He just takes off running after them at high speed, laughing his head off. He completely takes the chase and all attempts from Touma and Mikoto to stop him (several of them that would be lethal to anyone normal) in stride, treating it all like a big game.
218* New Testament Vol. 15:
219** Because of his whole WakeUpGoToSchoolSaveTheWorld routine, Touma's class attendance puts him at risk of being held back and he panics about it as he has to yet again leave to deal with a problem. Kamisato of all people points out that he could just have had [[StatingTheSimpleSolution someone take the roll call for him]] all these other times. Cue SkywardScream by Touma.
220** While looking for the location of [[IntellectualAnimal Kihara Noukan]]'s IdiosyncraticMechaStorage for the Anti-Art Attachment, Kihara Yuiitsu looked into Noukan's databases and found things such as [[EmbarrassingBrowserHistory a virtual Doberman figurine, tickets to see and handshake a dog idol, and search for a St. Bernard body pillow]], which prompted her to stop digging any deeper.
221* New Testament Vol. 18:
222** The volume as a whole delves into the past of TheChessmaster Aleister Crowley, which helps explain his motivation, but it also means it focuses on his well-known historical [[EccentricArtist eccentricities]] and LovableSexManiac antics, which somewhat destroys his image in the eyes of Touma.
223--->"Kamijou began trembling. He felt his image of the evil demon king crumbling down around him. This was like looking under your father’s bed or searching through your teacher’s computer. There was some important information that an adolescent was better off not knowing."
224* New Testament Vol. 21:
225** In the middle of a battle against the resurrected Golden Dawn magicians, Aleister launches into a MagiBabble Infodump to explain a spell to Accelerator and Touma, and says this is probably simple to Touma, since he experienced many adventures involving magic, so he does not need to spell out what it all means. Except Touma *did not* understand any of Aleister's explanations, and panics especially at Accelerator, the actual FishOutOfWater here, looking at him like he is confident he knows what to do. Eventually, Touma fesses up and admits he is BookDumb, to the disappointment of all present.
226--->'''Touma:''' I’m an idiot. I’m sorry, but I’m an idiot. So please tell me!! I doubt this magical knowledge will be useful in any other context, but everything here is so crazy I feel like I’ll be killed in an instant if I don’t learn this, so please teach me! Wait. Oh, no. Am I in serious danger of being held back a year because I’ve been using up all of my brain space for stuff like this!? Goddammit!!
227--->'''Accelerator:''' Tch. So it’s not about knowledge or skill. Are the real idiots the ones who can’t even absorb information properly? I can’t believe this.
228
229[[/folder]]
230
231%%[[folder:Genesis Testament]]
232
233%%[[/folder]]
234
235[[folder:Other]]
236* In the parody novel "Will the Spiky-Haired Idiot See a Piping Hot Dream of His Wife?", Touma goes to the mall and acquires VR goggles that will supposedly predict your future wife. While thinking it's nonsense, he decides he might as well try them on. Mikoto and Misaki, who were nearby in massage chairs, start arguing and shoving each other while trying to eavesdrop. Touma mutters about an eyepatch, a plaster cast, zigzagging seams, long hair, and finally says that a student dorm manager onee-san is a must. At first Misaki is elated when he gets to the "long hair" part, but the words "student dorm manager" cause both her and Mikoto to think of the Tokiwadai dorm manager, aka the absurd BadassNormal who strikes fear into the hearts of even Level 5s. They despair and think it's impossible to meet such a standard.
237* Meta example: Creator/MicahSolusod congratulates Creator/CliffordChapin on joining the Raildex cast [[https://twitter.com/maioceaneyes/status/498222390229610497 in the way that only Touma can.]]
238-->Allow me to welcome you to Academy City by smashing your face with a shield.\
239\
240With much misfortune,\
241Toma Kamijo.
242
243[[/folder]]

Top