Line #4 Awesome/NightCourt


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2	* In the first episode, a delivery man doesn't believe the very young-looking Harry is a judge. Harry retorts, "If I weren't the judge, could I do this?" and discharges a gag rifle that shoots seemingly-endless spring snakes over everyone else in the room. Harry then adds: "...In his office?"
3	* Dan had a great one in "Constitution, Part 2". Roz, who was recently diagnosed as Diabetic, has gone into shock and is hallucinating that she's a little girl again. This is made more problematic by her standing on a roof-ledge while crying about how her father used to wake her up after he got off the late-shift at work and fixed her an ice-cream cone and how she'll never be able to think about him while having ice cream ever again. After failing to [[TalkingDownTheSuicidal talk her down]] and taking two punches to the face and a GroinAttack trying to grapple her, Dan finally talks Roz down by pretending to be her father and offering to fix her an ice cream cone.
4	* The gang are trying to clear a huge backlog of cases by [[RaceAgainstTheClock hearing all of them before midnight]]. They're just a minute away with the last defendant up for felony drunk driving, which Harry figures they can turn over to the grand jury. However, the guy has heard that anyone whose case isn't adjudicated by midnight will go free, so he refuses to waive the reading of the information -- that is, he wants his (lengthy) formal charges read aloud in court. As everyone else groans in defeat, Dan (who has a hot date planned) grabs the papers and [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IBma9Z5dOao proceeds to read all three pages in 30 seconds.]] He finishes with 20 seconds to spare (but most of that is used up by [[ShowStopper cheering from the audience]]). Everyone gapes in shock at Dan's MotorMouth delivery until he yells at Harry, "My God, man, ''GAVEL!''" Harry turns the case over to the grand jury and adjourns the court with one second left.
5	* Nearly everyone on the cast gets one in "It's Just a Joke", in which [[PoliticallyIncorrectVillain Politically Incorrect Comedian]] Monte "Potty Man" Potter tries to score free publicity for his act by staging a First Amendment Battle over his right to Free Speech in Harry's court with a televangelist accomplice fanning the flames of censorship to increase donations to his church. After opening by getting the evangelist to admit that he doesn't have a church, just a "very large" PO box, and threatening to expose him to the press if he ever tries another money-grubbing publicity stunt in his court, Harry winds up turning the tables on Potty Man by arranging for the comedian to perform his act in front of the courtroom and...
6	** Christine tells the guy off and leaves after the first joke (a sexist one-liner about how to stop an overweight woman from attacking you).
7	** Lizette, the [[DitzySecretary mousy court stenographer]] whose major defining characteristic was not standing up for herself, actually stands up to the comedian when he tells a joke about women being hurt, saying "Violence isn't funny, it's sick."
8	** Roz's response to the quip about how the large number of African Americans in the audience suggests "they need more security around here". [[InsultBackfire "Actually, I AM security around here."]]
9	** Former soldier Mac and his understated punchline to the joke "What do you call an African American man in a uniform?" "A ''Veteran?''"
10	** Even blind vendor Jack - who was only on the show during Season 8 - gets one after the comedian spins a recitation of "Three Blind Mice" into a crack about blind people stealing his job because it was "Hire the Handicapped Week"[[note]]Which marks Potty Man as a NoCelebritiesWereHarmed version of Creator/AndrewDiceClay, who likewise made reciting nursery rhymes that quickly devolved into shock jokes a part of his routine.[[/note]] and Jack laughs.
11	--->'''Potter:''' ''(defensively)'' Aha! See! See, it's funny! The blind guy laughed!\
12	'''Jack:''' Yeah, I was just wondering if you look as stupid as you sound!
13	** Potter argues that Harry just pulled these people off the street and that "These people aren't real Potty Man fans!" Harry retorts that these people were standing in line for tickets to his show to see what all the fuss was about, thus exposing Potty Man as the [[OnlyInItForTheMoney money-grabbing fraud]] he really is.
14	** When Potter's idea of a parting shot at Harry is a trite YourMom joke, Dan, who has been defending the comedian's style of humor as satire throughout the episode, finally has enough and tells the guy off when he realizes that he [[MyGodYouAreSerious honestly believes the backward things he is saying]]. This leads to a SugarWiki/{{Funny Moment\|s}} and one of the few occasions when Dan was ever at a loss for words after the comedian - unable to think of any other comeback - [[BigStupidDoodooHead accuses Dan of being gay]] (yes, '''Dan''') saying he bets he likes show tunes. A muscular audience member stands up and says ''he'' likes show tunes... and he doesn't like Potter, whereupon Potter flees with the man in hot pursuit. (Crosses over into heartwarming too, when one remembers that Harry's mom is [[BerserkButton a very tender spot for him.]] Dan's breaking point wasn't an insult against himself; it was insulting Harry's mom.)
15	* Season 8's "Mac Takes a Vocation." Mac is hired by Justice Benjamin Franklin Welch, a New York Supreme Court judge, to serve as his assistant, but Harry has his suspicions that Justice Welch only hired him to make him popular with his increased African-American voters. When Harry visits Mac's swank new office, Mac assures Harry that he's aware of the demographics, but nothing like that is going on. Unfortunately, right after Harry leaves, Justice Welch shows up to convince Mac to take part in a photo-op with him, and it quickly becomes clear that being hired as a TokenMinority as a cheap grab for Black voters is ''exactly'' what's going on. Without a second thought whatsoever, [[ScrewTheMoneyIHaveRules Mac opens up his briefcase, packs up his things, and quits right then and there.]]
16	-->'''Mac:''' You see, [my wife and my daughter] look across the breakfast table and they see a man who goes to work who cares about what he does and who he is. If I stay here, they'll be seeing somebody else.
17	* In "Top Judge", Harry gets into a duel with a younger prankster judge. In perhaps his most CrazyEnoughToWork moment ever, Harry wins the duel after pretending to concede the fight, giving the younger judge his best silk robe (the prize he demanded if he won) and winds up trapping the younger judge inside a giant balloon he had rigged up to inflate by remote control, filling the courtroom.
18	-->'''Harry:''' Cleaver, you may be younger. You may be faster. You may even be ''smarter''. But you will NEVER, EVER, be crazier, ''[pulls out an awl to puncture the balloon he's trapped him with and gets an absolutely crazed look on his face]'' ... than me.
19	** The prank the young judge pulls on Harry isn't bad either. The courtroom waits for his prank to strike at the time he said would happen. When it doesn't, Harry calls for a recess... and the pounding of the gavel causes his ''entire bench to collapse''.
20	** Ah, but Harry [[CrazyPrepared knew it was coming]], and knew his rival's ego would get baited with that particular silk robe...
21	* In "Bringing Down Baby" the courtroom is used as the set for a TV show about a kid lawyer that the gang likes. However, they soon discover the kid is nothing more than a massive brat who throws his weight around to the point where a chief bailiff is telling Roz to just humor him. Roz openly tells the kid's mom she needs to control him. She finally hits her RageBreakingPoint and berates the kid as an obnoxious brat no one likes. The kid demands that she be fired [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=895EZkfZ5T8 but the kid's mom finally stands up to him, telling him to shut up and it's time to change his attitude.]] As she marches off, Roz asks her superior about being on report.
22	-->'''Roz''': 24th General Order for a Bailiff.
23	-->'''Superior''': There are only 23.
24	-->'''Roz''': There are 24 now. The new one is "Don't Mess with Roz."
25	* In "No Hard Feelings", Dan turns the tables on an aggressive lawyer with a big-name law firm, who only wanted to hire him because of his reported prowess of a lover and not because of his skill as a lawyer. This offended Dan because EveryoneHasStandards and while Dan has no qualms about sleeping with a colleague or even a boss, he does not play games with the law and takes his job as a lawyer seriously. So he slept with the lawyer, gave her the greatest night of passion in her life... and then turned down the job after giving her a TheReasonYouSuckSpeech, making it clear he had no interest in being a "high-price office gigolo".
26	--> '''Dan:''' When you think of this night... and you will... ''suffer''.
27	** His words to the passing janitor in the hallway: "You [[EurekaMoment can have your principles]] AND get lucky!"
28	* Dan saves a girl's life by performing an emergency appendectomy (getting instructions from an experienced doctor whose hands were broken) in "Danny Got His Gun Pt. 2".
29	* In "The Game Show", Bull competes on a game show to raise money for the after-school program he works with in his spare time. After Dan's attempt to hypnotize Bull into remaining calm under pressure fails, Bull rallies in the second round to come within striking distance of the lead. In the final round, despite having to face a ticking time-clock (his biggest fear), Bull has a moment of inspiration while wiping his brow and comes up with the correct answer to the final question - human sweat! Bull manages to overcome his fears, save the day and he does it all on his own.
30	* In "Snoop and Nuts, Part 2", Buddy taps into his primordial fatherhood instincts and orders a smart-mouthed Harry - still bitter over Buddy having kept the fact that he was Harry's biological father a secret - to "sit your butt down and don't give me any more of your lip!" Even Buddy is amazed and wonders where THAT came from.
31	* Roz pieing the official in "Her Honor Pt 2" after the group learns that she was the one who kept Harry from being re-appointed as a judge just because she didn't like the way he ran his court (for the pettiest of reasons, because he ''talks'' to criminals brought in rather than just sentence them right away). The way it played out is brilliant, the official gets in a haughty last word to Harry and makes to leave. Roz, holding a cake meant for Harry, turns it sideways just as she's reaching the door causing her to walk right into it.
32	* Dan gets a moment in one episode. One of the defendants in the court runs a business where, for $100 a pop, he'll hit someone in the face with a pie. Near the end of the episode, he nails Dan, and a laughing Florence says it was worth every penny. But then [[IAmSpartacus Harry says Florence doesn't need to cover for him - he hired the pie thrower.]] Christine says ''Harry'' doesn't need to cover for ''her''... and Mac says ''they'' don't need to cover for ''him''. Dan reveals that he knew all of them had separately taken the defendant up on his offer. He'd secretly made a deal to let the man keep $100 of everyone's money, give him the rest, and hit him with only one pie. As he wipes his eyes clear, he gloats that he's finally taken advantage "of being me" and goes off to buy a suede blazer from Brooks Brothers with the money.
33	* Bull, Harry and Christine ousting a sexually harassing judge (played by ''Series/FamilyTies''[='=] Michael Gross) in "Caught Red Handed".
34	-->'''Thursby:''' Hey... no female talks to me like that. I'll go where I want to go, when I'm ''damn'' good and ready!
35	-->''[Bull knocks the door off its hinges]''
36	-->'''Thursby:''' [[KnowWhenToFoldEm I'm ready now.]]
37	* In Season 3's "Night Off", a judge who has started to go insane from a combination of old age and frustration at the revolving door prisons and being unable to help people, has put first Mac, then Dan, and finally Harry, in holding on contempt charges. When the bailiff goes to uncuff Harry to put him in a cell, Harry says, "No, no, Nevermind. Here you go." and slips the cuffs off himself, demonstrating that he could have removed them at any point he wanted, due to his skills at stage magic.
38	* Episode 3.01, "Hello, Goodbye", there's a minor one for Dan that also crosses into Heartwarming and Funny. Bull has gone and drowned his sorrows for the passing of Selma, showing up to work drunk. Harry and Christine go to get food and coffee to try and sober Bull up, and instruct Dan to keep him from leaving. In one of his JerkWithAHeartOfGold moments, Dan stands his ground against Bull, knowing full well that he doesn't stand a chance against the bailiff. No snide remarks, no quips. Just crosses his arms, bracing for what he knows is coming, and says, firmly, [[HonorBeforeReason "I have my instructions."]] (Obviously, [[AmusingInjuries it doesn't end well for him,]] but by Dan's standards that was pretty hardcore.)
39	* Season 5's "The Jung and the Restless" is a defining moment for Roz. An encounter group, attended by the entire main cast, is held up by an armed robber running from the police, who holds the whole group hostage. He has everyone on the ground and is shooting off his gun to try and intimidate everyone, when Roz, who was sent there specifically to temper her "volatile" attitude, suddenly gets up and tells everyone to leave, and because it's ''[[TheDreaded Roz,]]'' they actually listen, over the robber's protests. Roz then reveals that she's spent this entire time SpottingTheThread -- she's deduced by his body language, and the way he talks and holds his gun, that this robber is just a scared 16-year-old kid, running around with the wrong crowd, having committed his first robbery, and is in way over his head. Roz talks the poor kid down with empathy and compassion, and convinces him to surrender to police. Roz reads this guy so well, she never once looks scared of this panicked kid with the gun.
40	* The barbershop quartet in season 5's "Another Day In The Life." On the charges of performing in public without a permit, all four members plead guilty..... [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2SdB_42XP2E in song.]] Their harmonies are so perfect, Harry suspends the fine! Him and Christine just can't get the smiles off their faces, and the group gets bonus points for leaving the courtroom singing "I'm Just Wild About Harry."
41	* Bull "MadeOfIron" Shannon surviving a ''bomb going off'' in season 5's "Dan, The Walking Time Bomb," and barely even flinching because he was busy making out with then-girlfriend Joy (and most certainly saving her life).
42	* Season 2 public defender Billie Young gets one in her introductory episode, while in ''jail.'' No, not simply because of how she got there -- refusing to reveal the location of a defendant's cat, for the sake of the cat's safety -- but for her behavior ''in'' jail. She gets heckled by all the streetwalkers behind her, and trash-talks right back at them, completely unbothered.
43	-->'''Prostitute:''' ''Billie?'' That's a ''man's'' name! \
44	'''Billie:''' Those are man's ''legs,'' we're even. ''[the streetwalkers '''oooh''' at that]''
45	** She gets one more in "The Computer Kid" where she convinces a stodgy, stuffy family to get out and live a little... ''by running to the window and {{mooning}} New York.'' Talk about spunk! The cherry on top is that she winds up getting other people in the neighborhood to do the same thing, and it becomes a long string of butts in windows.
46	--->'''Mac:''' ...is this what I fought for?!

Context Awesome / NightCourt