History WMG / Twilight

29th Jun '17 8:48:47 PM SallyShears
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[[WMG: In the "Twilight" universe, all supernatural creatures are tied to ethnic stereotypes]]
Native Americans can shift into wolves, eagles, bears, etc., depending on the tribe. Vampires are almost exclusively European, because Europeans are elegant, snooty, pale and posh, doncha' know. Bella's Asian classmates are secretly dragons hiding in human form. Ireland is populated entirely by leprechauns, and their sworn enemy are the Jews, who are dwarfs and want to steal their gold. Hispanics are all chupacabras. Romani people are witches with the gift of foresight, and Alice has Romani blood, hence her ESP and dark hair. The violence in the Middle East is in fact caused by all the mummy curses from the disturbed pharaohs who secretly rule that part of the world. Italians are all Greek gods in human form (Al Capone was Ares) and everyone's sassy gay friend is a literal fairy.


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[[WMG: All vampires have "special powers," some just aren't as obvious as others.]]
* Rosalie's power is a siren's beauty. She is considered to be the most beautiful person in the world, even among vampires, and Emmet was enchanted with her when she rescued him. But her alluring nature transcends her looks. In life she was very charismatic and popular, and enjoyed attention, so it makes sense that her vampiric power would be the ability to suck people in (har, har). Obviously this has some very unfortunate implications about her sexual assault, but it's "Twilight" so what do you expect.
* Emmet's power is fortitude. He's not only the most physically strong of the Cullens, but he had the mental strength to stay alive after being horribly mauled by a bear long enough for Rosalie to carry him to Carlisle, he had the stomach to leave his family with some provisions and never look back, and he is able to adapt to Carlisle's vegetarian vampire life. By extension, Emmet can more strongly resist other vampire's powers, like Edward's mind-probing and Jane's pain-infliction. We just don't see this proven because Emmet barely gets any screentime.
* Esme's power is.... whoa boy, if you thought Rosalie's had UnfortunateImplications, get ready... Esme's power is to adapt to what others want. In life she wanted to be a school teacher but allowed her family to talk her into marrying a man she didn't love, and stay married even when he abused her. Only losing her baby triggered her to attempt suicide--the fact that she failed her child. When Carlisle changed her, she didn't mind at all; it was what he wanted, and so it was what she wanted. The Cullens consider her the greatest maternal figure in their entire lives, despite several of them having good relationships with their real mothers before turning. Esme's emotions and mannerisms can magically shift to accommodate whoever she is interacting with so they can't help but love her. This "power" is obviously both an advantage and a disadvantage. It's a good thing it was Carlisle who changed her, and not say, James.
28th Jun '17 9:30:13 PM SallyShears
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[[WMG: Alice didn't worry about her human family because her visions showed her that everything would work out without her]]
Alice's backstory is pretty awful. Her mother was murdered on her father's orders, and he planned to kill Alice too, and when Alice tried to get help he turned it around to say she was crazy and had her sent to an asylum, where electroshock therapy gave her amnesia. Her father got away with his crimes, and Alice's little sister was left at his mercy. Even with amnesia, Alice did enough investigating into her past to know she'd suffered a horrible injustice. Why didn't she seek justice like Rosalie, or worry about her little sister? Because fate took care of that for her, and she saw it with her visions. Her father's unscrupulous lifestyle eventually got him killed (he paid a hitman to kill his wife in 1920, safe to say he was or wound up involved in the Al Capone type of crowd and after a series of events found himself at the bottom of a river with cement shoes), and Cynthia was safe.
27th Jun '17 10:50:43 PM SallyShears
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[[WMG:''Everyone'' has ulterior motives]]
* Bella is clearly suffering from at minimum three mental disorders, and in her own fucked-up mind believes she deserves and is destined to be "special," and is worming her way into the Cullens for the power, beauty, wealth and immortality vampirism has to offer.
* Edward, due to dying of a flue instead of joining the army like he wanted to, is eternally enraged by how he died by a force he couldn't control instead of being the masculine hero he dreamed of being, and is trying to compensate by controlling Bella and being her "hero." He was dismissive of Rosalie because her proud nature made her someone who wouldn't need him to "rescue" her or let him control her. And speaking of Rosalie...
* Rosalie sides with Bella in the abortion debate, because she is hoping Bella will die and she can adopt Renesme for herself, finally getting the "other half" of her "happy ending."
* Emmet supports Bella's transformation into a vampire because he hears human women's [[Film/AnchormanTheLegendOfRonBurgundy periods attract bears. They can smell the menstruation.]]
* Alice. Oh, Alice. You can see the future, so why couldn't so much unfortunate shit have been prevented? Because Alice can see much farther into the future than she lets on. And she is moving people around like pieces on a chessboard, doing her best to ensure that some catastrophe a few centuries down the road is avoided.
* Jasper is in on the above, and helps Alice's plan by influencing others' emotions, and helping Alice keep her own in check so she has a clear head for this whole scheme
* Carlisle isn't a typical doctor. He's a mad scientist, who is trying to find a cure for the vampiric blood-lust. This "only eat animals" thing is just an experiment he's trying out over the next century or two, to observe how well he and the other Cullens handle it.
* Esme lost her baby because she was making the child sick; she has Münchhausen-by-proxy disorder. She takes pleasure in mothering five eternal teenage monsters, because they are so dependent on her.
* Jacob imprinted on Renesmee to force peace between his tribe and the Cullens, and to help cure his own ego after losing the romantic competition for Bella. Fine, now I'm gonna marry the world's most powerful human/vampire hybrid! Pfft!
* The other werewolves are nasty to Leah because she's a woman with changing powers, threatening their patriarchy
* Charlie "accepts" Bella's transformation because he's finally glad to be rid of her. Can you blame him?
* Bella's "friends" Jessica and Angela tolerate her because Jessica is a psychology student who is trying to figure out what the hell Bella has, and Angela's minister father is secretly from a long line of holy monster hunters, and her first assignment on the job is to keep tabs on the girl who's romancing the vampire and the werewolf.
* Laurent is Rick James, bitch!
25th Jun '17 2:02:42 PM nombretomado
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That's why she sounded distant in the ''HocusPocus'' review, she was immersed in her fantasy world (specifically, she was experiencing the events of ''New Moon'').

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That's why she sounded distant in the ''HocusPocus'' ''Film/HocusPocus'' review, she was immersed in her fantasy world (specifically, she was experiencing the events of ''New Moon'').
4th Jun '17 5:19:18 PM nombretomado
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[[WMG: TVTropes is now owned by Stephenie Meyer]]

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[[WMG: TVTropes Wiki/TVTropes is now owned by Stephenie Meyer]]
20th May '17 3:52:05 PM nombretomado
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'''...[[VampireTheRequiem A bastard bloodline]] altered by the [[TabletopGame/ChangelingTheLost True Fae.]]'''

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'''...[[VampireTheRequiem [[TabletopGame/VampireTheRequiem A bastard bloodline]] altered by the [[TabletopGame/ChangelingTheLost True Fae.]]'''



* Alternately, it's a conspiracy devised by the [[VampireTheRequiem Mekhet and Daeva]] clans, partly to make mortals less resistant to the Daeva, and partly to reinforce the {{Masquerade}} by spreading misinformation about the nature of true vampires. Can you imagine a Daeva walking up to a group of Twilight fans, excitedly claim he can't read the mind of one of the group, then invite her to a more secluded place to "stare into her eyes"?

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* Alternately, it's a conspiracy devised by the [[VampireTheRequiem [[TabletopGame/VampireTheRequiem Mekhet and Daeva]] clans, partly to make mortals less resistant to the Daeva, and partly to reinforce the {{Masquerade}} by spreading misinformation about the nature of true vampires. Can you imagine a Daeva walking up to a group of Twilight fans, excitedly claim he can't read the mind of one of the group, then invite her to a more secluded place to "stare into her eyes"?
23rd Apr '17 12:18:29 PM nombretomado
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* [[TeamFourStar Freezer and Mister Popo]]

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* [[TeamFourStar [[Creator/TeamFourStar Freezer and Mister Popo]]
6th Apr '17 10:14:08 PM nombretomado
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* [[PokemonSpecial Red, Green, Blue, Yellow, Etc...]]

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* [[PokemonSpecial [[Manga/PokemonSpecial Red, Green, Blue, Yellow, Etc...]]
4th Apr '17 5:44:00 PM nombretomado
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** Of course, that's the dimension where all those things are ''good'': Larry the Cable Guy is only known as [[WesternAnimation/{{Cars}} Mater]], Schumacher got some substance to go with the style, ''Epic Movie'' and its ilk are proper parodies along the lines of ''Film/{{Airplane}}!'' and ''Film/RobinHoodMenInTights'', and ''Twilight'' is the ascended 'tween spin-off of ''Series/BuffyTheVampireSlayer''. However, due to equivalent exchange, this means that {{Pixar}} movies are [[SoOkayItsAverage just "okay"]] and Creator/HayaoMiyazaki and Creator/AkiraKurosawa are obscure directors who are only known among other filmmakers and ''otaku''.

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** Of course, that's the dimension where all those things are ''good'': Larry the Cable Guy is only known as [[WesternAnimation/{{Cars}} Mater]], Schumacher got some substance to go with the style, ''Epic Movie'' and its ilk are proper parodies along the lines of ''Film/{{Airplane}}!'' and ''Film/RobinHoodMenInTights'', and ''Twilight'' is the ascended 'tween spin-off of ''Series/BuffyTheVampireSlayer''. However, due to equivalent exchange, this means that {{Pixar}} Creator/{{Pixar}} movies are [[SoOkayItsAverage just "okay"]] and Creator/HayaoMiyazaki and Creator/AkiraKurosawa are obscure directors who are only known among other filmmakers and ''otaku''.
25th Mar '17 6:04:32 PM nombretomado
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* It's true. [[CharlieTheUnicorn Here they are.]]

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* It's true. [[CharlieTheUnicorn [[WebAnimation/CharlieTheUnicorn Here they are.]]
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