History UsefulNotes / Houston

Entertainment and tourist attractions-wise, despite its size, Houston tends to lack much in the way of major theme parks and entertainment options. The city's major theme park, Ride/SixFlags [=AstroWorld=], was closed in 2005 after years of poor maintenance and declining attendance, and most attempts to have another theme park in the city following it usually wound up in DevelopmentHell. Other attempts to start up a theme park in the city back in the seventies and eighties however, such as Busch Gardens Houston and a theme park based on Creator/HannaBarbera's [=IPs=] would also fail miserably and would close after a couple of years for much of the same reasons. There are smaller amusement centers in nearby Galveston and Kemah, but you'll have to drive on over to San Antonio or Dallas if you want to hit up a full-blown amusement park. Most entertainment options in the city tend to be more low key and aimed more at locals instead, such as the Houston Zoo and the various museums scattered around memorial park, the Houston Space Center at NASA and a couple of smaller parks such as the indoor park Funplex (which has gained an infamous reputation amongst natives following the '80s for being a rundown CrappyCarnival) and the resident water park, Six Flags Hurricane Harbor Splashtown.[[note]]As for ''why'' Houston isn't able to sustain a major theme park, it largely comes down to economics. Amusement parks are very costly to build and maintain, and there's simply not enough interest from Houston or developers to make one happen and be successful, especially when most attempts in the past have failed. The fact that San Antonio and Dallas (which are only a 2-3 hour drive from Houston) also have major successful amusement parks have also given developers cold feet, as why bother building a theme park in Houston when people can just go to Dallas or San Antonio instead. Some also point to Houston's infamous weather as being another possible factor against a theme park. While other hot cities have major theme parks (Ride/WaltDisneyWorld in Florida for one notable example), Houston's blend of oppressive humidity and hot weather makes it so nobody in Houston would ''want'' to go to a theme park in the summertime. Not to mention the presence of unpredictable extreme weather like Hurricanes.[[/note]]

Entertainment and tourist attractions-wise, despite its size, Houston tends to lack much in the way of major theme parks and entertainment options. The city's major theme park, Ride/SixFlags [=AstroWorld=], was closed in 2005 after years of poor maintenance and declining attendance, and most attempts to have another theme park in the city following it usually wound up in DevelopmentHell. Other attempts to start up a theme park in the city back in the seventies and eighties however, such as Busch Gardens Houston and a theme park based on Creator/HannaBarbera's [=IPs=] would also fail miserably and would close after a couple of years for much of the same reasons. There are smaller amusement centers in nearby Galveston and Kemah, but you'll have to drive on over to San Antonio or Dallas if you want to hit up a full-blown amusement park. Most entertainment options in the city tend to be more low key and aimed more at locals instead, such as the Houston Zoo and the various museums scattered around memorial park, the Houston Space Center at NASA and a couple of smaller parks such as the indoor park Funplex (which has gained an infamous reputation amongst natives following the '80s for being a rundown CrappyCarnival) and the resident water park, Six Flags Hurricane Harbor Splashtown.[[note]]As for ''why'' Houston isn't able to sustain a major theme park, it largely comes down to economics. Amusement parks are very costly to build and maintain, and there's simply not enough interest in Houston to make one happen and be successful. The fact that San Antonio and Dallas (which are only a 2-3 hour drive from Houston) also have major successful amusement parks have also given developers cold feet, as why bother building a theme park in Houston when people can simply go to Dallas or San Antonio instead. Some also point to Houston's humid weather as being another possible factor. While other hot cities have major theme parks (Ride/WaltDisneyWorld in Florida for one notable example), Houston's blend of oppressive humidity and hot weather makes it so nobody in Houston would want to go to a theme park in the summertime (even when other parks thrive in the summer). Not to mention the presence of unpredictable extreme weather like Hurricanes.[[/note]]

Houston's notoriously humid weather, the costs to build an amusement park,

Entertainment and tourist attractions-wise, despite its size, Houston tends to lack much in the way of major theme parks and entertainment options. The city's major theme park, Ride/SixFlags [=AstroWorld=], was closed in 2005 after years of poor maintenance and declining attendance, and most attempts to have another theme park in the city following it usually wound up in DevelopmentHell. Other attempts to start up a theme park in the city back in the seventies and eighties however, such as Busch Gardens Houston and a theme park based on Creator/HannaBarbera's [=IPs=] would also fail miserably and would close after a couple of years for much of the same reasons. There are smaller amusement centers in nearby Galveston and Kemah, but you'll have to drive on over to San Antonio or Dallas if you want to hit up a full-blown amusement park. Most entertainment options in the city tend to be more low key and aimed more at locals instead, such as the Houston Zoo and the various museums scattered around memorial park, the Houston Space Center at NASA and a couple of smaller parks such as the indoor park Funplex (which has gained an infamous reputation amongst natives following the '80s for being a rundown CrappyCarnival) and the resident water park, Six Flags Hurricane Harbor Splashtown.

Houston also has a very active sports scene with pro teams in almost every major American league (except hockey). Houston is home to the Houston Texans of the UsefulNotes/NationalFootballLeague, the Houston Astros of UsefulNotes/MajorLeagueBaseball, the Houston Rockets of the UsefulNotes/NationalBasketballAssociation, and Houston Dynamo FC of Major League Soccer. The Texans are the youngest team in the NFL, having been founded in 2002; for many decades, the city was home to the Houston Oilers, but the team left town for Tennessee in the late '90s (kind of a sore topic for native sports fans, especially since the Oilers' new incarnation, the Titans, plays in the Texans' division, so bring this up at your own risk). The Houston area also has no fewer than ''five'' major college (i.e., NCAA Division I) athletic programs, four of which are located within the Houston city limits. The most prominent are the two whose football teams play in the top level of college football, the Football Bowl Subdivision—the University of Houston Cougars and the Rice University Owls. Three more play in the Football Championship Subdivision, namely the Huskies of Houston Christian University[[note]]which was Houston Baptist before September 2022[[/note]] and the teams from the area's two largest historically black universities, the Panthers of Prairie View A&M University (the only one not in Houston proper) and the Tigers of Texas Southern University.

Overall, major successes of Houston-based sports teams have been relatively scarce. While both the Rockets and the Dynamo won two championships each and the (now defunct) Houston Comets of the WNBA were that league's first dynasty, winning its first four championships, the Texans have never made it to the conference championship game, let alone the Super Bowl. The Astros have made the World Series thrice--first in 2005 (which saw them swept by the White Sox in four games), again in 2017 against the LA Dodgers (which saw them win in game 7), and a third time in 2019; the later revelation of an elaborate sign-stealing cheating system placed a bit of a shadow over those victories, though Houston fans are quick to point out similar scandals from other successful teams. The Rice baseball team at least has made the playoffs for over two consecutive decades, but it only won a championship in 2003. This has led some to characterize the city's teams as [[ButtMonkey hapless]], although it's not for the lack of trying. Houston has had a very impressive list of players play for its teams, like Hakeem Olajuwon, Clyde Drexler, Tracy [=McGrady=], Yao Ming, and James Harden for the Rockets; Nolan Ryan, Craig Biggio (whose entire career was spent here), and Jeff Bagwell for the Astros; Andre Johnson, J.J. Watt, and Deshaun Watson for the Texans; Ken Stabler, Bruce Matthews, Earl Campbell, and Warren Moon for the Oilers; Brian Ching and Brad Davis for the Dynamo; Cynthia Cooper, Dawn Staley, Sheryl Swoopes, and Tina Thompson for the Comets; Carli Lloyd for the Dash (see below); and Olajuwon and Drexler were the biggest-name members of the Cougars' Phi Slama Jama era.

Houston also has a proud history with its stadiums. The Astros' Minute Maid Park and the Texans' NRG Stadium both have retractable roofs (which tend to remain closed due to Houston's notorious summer humidity), but any talk about Houston sports has to include the Astrodome. Billed as the "Eighth Wonder of the World" and opened in 1965, it was the first domed stadium in the world and gave rise to the use of artificial turf in baseball and football (hence the still-common nickname "Astroturf"). Nowadays, the Dome sits vacant next to the larger NRG Stadium and any discussion about its future will yield a heated debate. Rounding out the sports venues are the Rockets' Toyota Center, the Dynamo's and Dash's Shell Energy Stadium (also used for Texas Southern Tigers football), the University of Houston's TDECU Stadium, and historic Rice Stadium.

Culture-wise, the city does have resident companies in each of the performing arts, and has some interesting takes on art: it's pretty much the art car capital of America. The city has a notable music scene, especially in hip-hop, where it's one of the most influential cities in the South, known for chopped and screwed remixes and home to MC's like Pimp C, Bun B, Slim Thug, Paul Wall, Mike Jones [[CatchPhrase (who?)]], and Megan thee Stallion. ''Tejano'' music also [[StealthPun rocketed]] to international fame here. Also, the city is fairly well-known for its rodeo, the largest such event in the world. Those who know the city's history, though, find this amusing: Houston was never a cow town--it traded in cotton before Spindletop. After Spindletop, oil was its stock in trade and has pretty much remained so ever since, despite efforts to branch out into other sectors such as banking (the banks got bought out), aerospace (there's not as much money here as you'd think), and medicine (which has seen moderate success).

Houston also has a very active sports scene with pro teams in almost every major American league (except hockey). Houston is home to the Houston Texans of the UsefulNotes/NationalFootballLeague, the Houston Astros of [[UsefulNotes/{{Baseball}} Major League Baseball]], the Houston Rockets of the UsefulNotes/NationalBasketballAssociation, and Houston Dynamo FC of Major League Soccer. The Texans are the youngest team in the NFL, having been founded in 2002; for many decades, the city was home to the Houston Oilers, but the team left town for Tennessee in the late '90s (kind of a sore topic for native sports fans, especially since the Oilers' new incarnation, the Titans, plays in the Texans' division, so bring this up at your own risk). The Houston area also has no fewer than ''five'' major college (i.e., NCAA Division I) athletic programs, four of which are located within the Houston city limits. The most prominent are the two whose football teams play in the top level of college football, the Football Bowl Subdivision—the University of Houston Cougars and the Rice University Owls. Three more play in the Football Championship Subdivision, namely the Huskies of Houston Christian University[[note]]which was Houston Baptist before September 2022[[/note]] and the teams from the area's two largest historically black universities, the Panthers of Prairie View A&M University (the only one not in Houston proper) and the Tigers of Texas Southern University.

[[caption-width-right:350:''[[Music/{{Lecrae}} "Welcome to H-Town."]]'']]

* ''Film/TheSwarm''

[[caption-width-right:350:''[[Music/{{Lecrae}} "Welcome to H-Town..."]]'']]

* Northside Village - Residential area east of The Heights and directly north of Downtown. One of Houston's many majority-Hispanic communities, it's something of a mixed-bag; the western side is moderately middle-class and looks like an extension of the Heights, but the farther east you go, the more run-down it gets. As of 2022, the main drag up Elysian looks a bit like the Heights after a ZombieApocalypse, and there don't appear to be any attempts at gentrification anytime soon[[note]]This might be starting to change, though; the Elysian Viaduct has been under construction since 2017, completed in 2021, and changes are finally starting to come, slowly but surely[[/note]]. Most of Northside's eastern third or so is occupied by a massive Industrial Park, contributing to the decidedly blue-collar feel of the neighborhood. Additionally, the Saint Arnold Brewing Company has a brewery here due north of Downtown.

Some of Greater Houston's most notable regions (including its enclaves, areas in its ETJ, and connected suburbs) includes:

For much of its history, Houston was quite small and unimportant. In fact, nearby Galveston was more important and larger for a long time. After Galveston was torn apart by a hurricane, the focus shifted to the more inland city of Houston, especially after the massive Spindletop oil strike in 1901 roughly 85 miles/140 km to the east in Beaumont. Despite the discovery of oil, Houston remained a smaller, lesser-known city up until after UsefulNotes/WorldWarII when one of the greatest revolutions in demographic shifts brought about by technology happened: the "Air-Conditioning Revolution". This is not a joke. The coming of air conditioning made the once inhospitable Western and Southern climates of the United States more welcoming, and a massive population shift took place, as people moved from the Rust Belt to the Sun Belt. Houston subsequently exploded like a weed, and it, along with other Sun Belt cities like UsefulNotes/LosAngeles and San Jose, rose to prominence as some of the largest cities in the country. Houston spread in all directions, eventually surrounding some cities that incorporated to avoid annexation. These cities became enclaves, cities surrounded by the entirety of the city of Houston (this is common for other major cities in Texas as well). Despite being independent, these enclaves are really nothing more than self-important neighborhoods, and could largely be considered a part of Houston, except they aren't on paper. This has led to controversy, as many of these enclaves, in both Houston and elsewhere, are some of the whitest, richest cities in not just Texas but the entire '''country'''. Discussing the merits of their existence leads to [[FlameWar unpleasantness]]. The City of Houston has been so kind as to document its unbelievably rapid growth for us [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=445Z1Dc5-Rw&feature=player_embedded here]].

For much of its history, Houston was quite small and unimportant. In fact, nearby Galveston was more important and larger for a long time. After Galveston was torn apart by a hurricane, the focus shifted to the more inland city of Houston, especially after the coming of oil. Despite the discovery of oil, Houston remained a smaller, lesser-known city up until after UsefulNotes/WorldWarII when one of the greatest revolutions in demographic shifts brought about by technology happened: the "Air-Conditioning Revolution." This is not a joke. The coming of air conditioning made the once inhospitable Western and Southern climates of the United States more welcoming, and a massive population shift took place, as people moved from the Rust Belt to the Sun Belt. Houston subsequently exploded like a weed, and it, along with other Sun Belt cities like UsefulNotes/LosAngeles and San Jose rose to prominence as some of the largest cities in the country. Houston spread in all directions, eventually surrounding some cities that incorporated to avoid annexation. These cities became enclaves, cities surrounded by the entirety of the city of Houston (this is common for other major cities in Texas as well). Despite being independent, these enclaves are really nothing more than self-important neighborhoods, and could largely be considered a part of Houston, except they aren't on paper. This has lead to controversy, as many of these enclaves, in both Houston and elsewhere, are some of the whitest, richest cities in not just Texas but the entire '''country.''' Discussing the merits of their existence leads to [[FlameWar unpleasantness]]. The City of Houston has been so kind as to document its unbelievably rapid growth for us [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=445Z1Dc5-Rw&feature=player_embedded here]].

Interestingly, it also has the largest collection of skyscrapers in Texas, including the tallest building outside a central business district, the Williams Tower. It also has probably the most spread out skyline in the entire United States, owing to the fact that it is the largest city in the country without formal zoning laws. This is not a historical accident. It's been said that Social Security is the third rail of American politics, but that doesn't hold a candle to Houstonians' reaction to zoning proposals. More than one political career has been suddenly ended by embracing proposals that, while not zoning in themselves, could have led to it. This has led to a skyline that is more expansive than Los Angeles'[[note]]the Uptown Area by itself, home to the Williams Tower, is home to more than 23 million square feet of office space and is bigger than the downtowns of Los Angeles, UsefulNotes/{{Denver}}, or UsefulNotes/{{Pittsburgh}}[[/note]], but less dense than UsefulNotes/{{Chicago}} and UsefulNotes/NewYorkCity. This has also, unfortunately, led to one of the most infamous cases of urban sprawl in the country, with suburbs spread out for miles in every direction. Much of the area (and by much, we mean all) north and west of the city remains unincorporated, mainly because of Texas' extraterritorial jurisdiction ([=ETJ=]) laws, thus placing it all effectively within the city of Houston, and making it so Houston doesn't have to annex it. Recently, a large area to Houston's north, The Woodlands, has been trying to incorporate. Houston has been amazingly conciliatory (probably due to messy annexation fights when Houston consumed the master planned communities of Clear Lake City and Kingwood), but Woodlands residents have been hit with sticker shock and this may not happen.

Houston also has a very active sports scene with pro teams in almost every major American league (except hockey). Houston is home to the Houston Texans of the UsefulNotes/NationalFootballLeague, the Houston Astros of [[UsefulNotes/{{Baseball}} Major League Baseball]], the Houston Rockets of the UsefulNotes/NationalBasketballAssociation, and the Houston Dynamo of Major League Soccer. The Texans are the youngest team in the NFL, having been founded in 2002; for many decades, the city was home to the Houston Oilers, but the team left town for Tennessee in the late '90s (kind of a sore topic for native sports fans, especially since the Oilers' new incarnation, the Titans, plays in the Texans' division, so bring this up at your own risk). The Houston area also has no fewer than ''five'' major college (i.e., NCAA Division I) athletic programs, four of which are located within the Houston city limits. The most prominent are the two whose football teams play in the top level of college football, the Football Bowl Subdivision—the University of Houston Cougars and the Rice University Owls. Three more play in the Football Championship Subdivision, namely the Huskies of Houston Christian University[[note]]which was Houston Baptist before September 2022[[/note]] and the teams from the area's two largest historically black universities, the Panthers of Prairie View A&M University (the only one not in Houston proper) and the Tigers of Texas Southern University.

Houston also has a proud history with its stadiums. The Astros' Minute Maid Park and the Texans' NRG Stadium both have retractable roofs (which tend to remain closed due to Houston's notorious summer humidity), but any talk about Houston sports has to include the Astrodome. Billed as the "Eighth Wonder of the World" and opened in 1965, it was the first domed stadium in the world and gave rise to the use of artificial turf in baseball and football (hence the still-common nickname "Astroturf"). Nowadays, the Dome sits vacant next to the larger NRG Stadium and any discussion about its future will yield a heated debate. Rounding out the sports venues are the Rockets' Toyota Center, the Dynamo's and Dash's PNC Stadium (also used for Texas Southern Tigers football), the University of Houston's TDECU Stadium, and historic Rice Stadium.

From the way people drive, one might assume that street racing is a popular participator sport amongst the populace. The reality is that in Houston proper, an officer issuing a speeding ticket is likely to get run over by another speeder, and as such, the local police don't even bother anymore. This is ''not'' true in the suburbs, though, and some of them are speed traps out of nightmares. Despite this (or maybe because of it), traffic in Houston is infamously bad, and it's best to avoid the expressways during certain times of the day. The beltway is usually clear though (if you don't mind paying a toll). Mass transit wise, Houston seems to be severely lacking for a city its size, although steps have been made to rectify this. A light rail system was built in 2003 and expanded in 2015 while the bus system has gotten overhauled a few times over the years as well. Still, Houston remains a car and highway city.

Entertainment and tourist attractions-wise, despite its size, Houston tends to lack much in the way of major theme parks and entertainment options. The city's major theme park, Ride/SixFlags [=AstroWorld=], was closed in 2005 after years of poor maintenance and declining attendance, and most attempts to have another theme park in the city following it usually wound up in DevelopmentHell. Other attempts to start up a theme park in the city back in the seventies and eighties however, such as Busch Gardens Houston and a theme park based on Creator/HannaBarbera's [=IP=]s would also fail miserably and would close after a couple of years for much of the same reasons. There are smaller amusement centers in nearby Galveston and Kemah, but you'll have to drive on over to San Antonio or Dallas if you want to hit up a full blown amusement park. Most entertainment options in the city tend to be more low key and aimed more at locals instead, such as the Houston Zoo and the various museums scattered around memorial park, the Houston Space Center at NASA and a couple of smaller parks such as the indoor park Funplex (which has gained an infamous reputation amongst natives following the '80s for being a rundown CrappyCarnival) and the resident water park, Six Flags Hurricane Harbor Splashtown.

Culture-wise, the city does have resident companies in each of the performing arts, and has some interesting takes on art: it's pretty much the art car capital of America. The city has a notable music scene, especially in hip-hop, where it's one of the most influential cities in the South, known for chopped and screwed remixes and home to MC's like Pimp C, Bun B, Slim Thug, Paul Wall, Mike Jones [[CatchPhrase (who?)]], and Megan thee Stallion. ''Tejano'' music also [[StealthPun rocketed]] to international fame here. Also, the city is fairly well known for its rodeo, the largest such event in the world. Those who know the city's history, though, find this amusing: Houston was never a cow town--it traded in cotton before Spindletop. After Spindletop, oil was its stock in trade and has pretty much remained so ever since, despite efforts to branch out into other sectors such as banking (the banks got bought out), aerospace (there's not as much money here as you'd think), and medicine (which has seen some moderate success).

* Sports and Convention District - If there's a major event downtown, chances are it's happening here. Anchored by the George R. Brown Convention Center and the adjacent Discovery Green, this area is also home to Houston's pro baseball, basketball, and soccer teams; Minute Maid Park, the Toyota Center, and PNC Stadium respectively. Watch out for rampant construction as hotels and condos are popping up around these venues like crazy!

* Katy - One of the few incorporated cities besides Houston in the area. Was a small railroad town once, but the railroad has moved on to greener pastures and it rarely gets rail traffic at this point. Is the last thing you will see in the Greater Houston area going westward. Is most well known for being home to the Katy Mills Mall, one of the premier shopping centers in the Houston Area. Ticks off Houston for existing and cutting off western growth. Houston got them back by surrounding them with its ETJ and thus cutting off their growth ''period''.

* Energy Corridor - One of the major urban centers for Houston's spread out skyline, it lines Interstate 10 all the way up to the Beltway. It's all in Houston, though some of it is only limited annexation [[note]]Which means it's in Houston, yet not really. Houston gets the tax money and the right to say they own it, but don't have to provide services, like police[[/note]]. Is called the Energy Corridor because it is home to a lot of energy-related (read: oil) companies, including BP America (now you know where you can go to protest someone), [=ConocoPhillips=], [=ExxonMobil=], and Shell Oil Company. Unless you're an admirer of modern skyscraper architecture or are just passing through to get to all the fun stuff, then the best thing to do around here is go to one of the truly huge parks located here (and by huge, we mean they are, together, the largest urban parks system outside the national park system): the county-run George Bush Park and Bear Creek Pioneers Park, and the city-run Cullen Park.

* Wrestling/SammyGuevara (Katy Area)

* Music/{{Selena}} Quintanilla - the ''tejano'' sensation more famously known by [[FirstNameBasis just her first name]] (born in Lake Jackson, but eventually moved to [[UsefulNotes/OtherCitiesInTexas Corpus Christi]])

* ''Film/{{Apollo 13}}'' - (at least the parts on Earth, other than those involving launch and splashdown).
* ''Film/{{Armageddon}}'' filmed at the Johnson Space Center facilities.

->"Houston is kind of a melting pot. There are so many different cultures and ethnicities represented out there, even on my team. It’s really cool: you’ll see so many different things."

Oh, and it's ''the'' place to call when you want to inform MissionControl that [[Film/{{Apollo 13}} you have a problem]]. '''[[SchmuckBait And For the love of GOD,]] [[FandomRivalry if you are a fan of anything in Dallas and you are in Houston]], [[SeriousBusiness keep it to yourself]].'''

* [[AwesomeMcCoolname Houston Skyline District]] - Where all those awesome skyscrapers are located. Generally seen as Houston's most recognizable feature, most of its tallest buildings are there. Also here is the Houston tunnel system, a subterranean mall that connects most of the skyscrapers.

Houston also has a very active sports scene with pro teams in almost every major American league (except hockey). Houston is home to the Houston Texans of the UsefulNotes/NationalFootballLeague, the Houston Astros of [[UsefulNotes/{{Baseball}} Major League Baseball]], the Houston Rockets of the UsefulNotes/NationalBasketballAssociation, and the Houston Dynamo of Major League Soccer. The Texans are the youngest team in the NFL, having been founded in 2002; for many decades, the city was home to the Houston Oilers, but the team left town for Tennessee in the late '90s (kind of a sore topic for native sports fans, especially since the Oilers' new incarnation, the Titans, plays in the Texans' division, so bring this up at your own risk). The Houston area also has no fewer than ''five'' major college (i.e., NCAA Division I) athletic programs, four of which are located within the Houston city limits. The most prominent are the two whose football teams play in the top level of college football, the Football Bowl Subdivision—the University of Houston Cougars and the Rice University Owls. Three more play in the Football Championship Subdivision, namely the Huskies of Houston Baptist University, the Panthers of Prairie View A&M University (the only one not in Houston proper), and the Tigers of Texas Southern University.

Overall, major successes of Houston-based sports teams have been relatively scarce. While both the Rockets and the Dynamo won two championships each and the (now defunct) Houston Comets of the WNBA were that league's first dynasty, winning its first four championships, the Texans have never made it to the conference championship game, let alone the Super Bowl. The Astros have made the World Series thrice--first in 2005 (which saw them swept by the White Sox in four games), again in 2017 against the LA Dodgers (which saw them win in game 7), and a third time in 2019; the later revelation of an elaborate sign-stealing cheating system placed a bit of a shadow over those victories, though Houston fans are quick to point out similar scandals from other successful teams. The Rice baseball team at least has made the playoffs for over two consecutive decades, but it only won a championship in 2003. This has led some to characterize the city's teams as [[ButtMonkey hapless]], although it's not for the lack of trying. Houston has had a very impressive list of players play for its teams, like Hakeem Olajuwon, Clyde Drexler, Tracy [=McGrady=], Yao Ming, and James Harden for the Rockets; Nolan Ryan, Craig Biggio (whose entire career was spent here), and Jeff Bagwell for the Astros; Andre Johnson, J.J. Watt, and Deshaun Watson for the Texans; Ken Stabler, Bruce Matthews, Earl Campbell, and Warren Moon for the Oilers; Brian Ching and Brad Davis for the Dynamo; Cynthia Cooper, Dawn Staley, Sheryl Swoopes, and Tina Thompson for the Comets; Carli Lloyd for the Dash (see below); and Olajuwon and Clyde Drexler were the biggest-name members of the Phi Slama Jama Cougars era.

* Pasadena - Largest city in the Greater Houston Area (that isn't named Houston). Was named after Pasadena, California by its founder because he found the climate here similar to the climate there. Is sometimes conflated with Houston because the two are ''literally'' joined at the hip. Took part of Clear Lake from Houston and closed the city off from the bay via the south. Known for being poorer than most of Houston's suburbs, except for the Clear Lake area, for having massive industrial parks near the shipping Canal and for having a notorious history of corruption. Only a small part of the city touches the bay.

* La Porte - Despite the name, there is no port here (It ''is'' extremely close to Morgan's Point, mentioned below, and it's hard to tell when you leave one and enter the other if you work the BC Terminal). The only thing of note about this working class community is that the San Jacinto Monument, the World's tallest monumental column, even surpassing the Washington Monument, is located nearby and can be seen from Interstate 10.

* Clear Lake City - A master-planed community that is pretty much a textbook definition of suburbia. When anyone remembers this area, it's usually to bring up the fact that there was a nasty annexation fight when Houston decided to take it back in the '70s. The fight failed, and most of the community was annexed by Houston. The remainder was annexed by the city of Pasadena, though it's a relatively small portion. One of the largest master planned communities in Houston. The Johnson Space Center is located here as well. Interestingly, while still composed of a mostly white population, Clear Lake City also has a notable concentration of Asians, both Eastern and Indian. This is likely due to many either working as or having descended from NASA employees.

Centered around the city of Sugar Land, the Sugar Land area has no real set geographical boundaries, unlike many of the other regions of Houston. Roughly, it is everything outside of the Beltway, South of Westpark Tollway, and west of Fort Bend Parkway (and not in Houston). Home to some of Houston's nicest suburbs, it represents the area that marks the last thing you see of Greater Houston going towards Victoria, Texas, and Corpus Christi. Much of the area has already incorporated and is thus out of Houston's reach, much to the city's chagrin. Notable Houston neighborhoods and independent cities in the area include:
* Sugar Land - One of the largest cities in the Greater Houston Area, also one of the wealthiest and fastest growing as well, and at least important enough to get its own upscale mall. Used to be a company town run by Imperial Sugar, who had a huge sugar refining operation there, hence the name. This lasted until the 1950s, when the city finally established a municipal government instead of joining Houston, and the city lost what made it so unique in the first place. Nowadays, the city is the very definition of CutandPasteSuburb. Hell, more than half the current city is master-planned communities (which its county, Fort Bend County, leads the nation in) and it's poised to annex even more. Pretty sure Houston regrets not annexing the little town earlier.

* Sienna Plantation - A prime example of real life irony, it is a majority white upper class suburb, situated on land that was once home to numerous plantations (hence the name), and is in the ETJ of Missouri City, a majority Black city. Wrap your head around that.

* Richmond - not to be confused with Richmond Virginia. A small town that literally straddles Rosenberg, one wonders why they don't merge into one city. During Reconstruction, there was a major "war" largely centered here between Democrats and Reconstructionists put in power by Blacks. The city had a single mayor from 1949 to 2012, Hilmar Moore, possibly the longest serving public official in the history of the United States.

* Alief - A huge community separating the Katy Area from the Sugar Land Area. Most of Alief is in Houston, but portions of it are still in Harris County's unincorporated area, though, they are in Houston's ETJ, so they might as well be part of Houston anyway. Ending at Westheimer Road in the north, it is the large area of Southwest Houston that is outside the Beltway. Like many areas of Houston, it suffered from white flight in the 70s as Whites moved out to get away from Blacks, who were trying to get away from Mexicans. Later, large amounts of Asians from China, India, Pakistan, Vietnam, Cambodia, Korea, Taiwan, the Philippines, Japan, Laos, and Indonesia also settled here. In some places you can even find dual language signs. Like so many areas of Houston, it fought annexation for years, but Houston still consumed most of it.

* Rice Village - A small shopping district located just West of Rice University. A dense and well known retail location, it is a culinary madhouse, with various restaurants, including three French, two Japanese, two Chinese, two Italian, two Turkish, one Mexican, two Spanish, one Mediterranean, one Vietnamese, two Indian, and three Thai restaurants as well as sandwich shops, delicatessens, and specialty food and beverage stores.

** Link Valley - A small area that used to be one of the most notorious [[WretchedHive Wretched Hives]] in Houston, the police cracked down on this area and eventually had the majority of the rotting apartment buildings here torn down and replaced by townhouse communities; now a gentry neighborhood.

Houston's second major group of enclaves, and their existences are no more justified then that of the island cities. Originally a small town surrounded by farmland, the area now know as the Memorial Villages first attempted to escape annexation by Houston (because to suburban whites, that's the equivalent of selling your soul) via incorporating as one large city, called Spring Branch, in the 1950s. This failed, and thus, over the course of a decade, the Memorial Villages came into existence one by one, and have stayed ever since, despite being surrounded by Houston. Even though they are all independent cities, the cities collectively maintain a police department and fire department. Some villages are:

* Denver Harbor - East of the Fifth Ward and Kashmere Gardens and north of the Houston Ship Channel. An almost entirely industrialized area and not very scenic, though one can find the occasional Townhouse on the southern side. A majority Hispanic community, it contains a number of historical bungalow homes and cottages and was originally settled by blue collar whites working in the nearby train yards and port facilities. Its name come from two of the original subdivisions that made up the community Denver and Harbor. In 1939, an unknown vagrant painted the word "Podunk" on the side of a water tower, referring to how out of the way the neighborhood was. The city repeatedly tried to paint over the sign, only for it to be repainted on within days. Eventually, the entire community got in on the joke and started calling themselves "Podunkers". As the community transitioned from being working-class White American to being working-class Hispanic Americans, the name fell into disuse.

* Clinton Park - A small community located to the east of Loop 610, Clinton Park was one of the first communities developed for African Americans in Texas, being marketed to middle class black families. It grew and prospered at first, due to segregation preventing Blacks from living in white neighborhoods and its close proximity to the Port of Houston, located to the south of the neighborhood; following integration, blacks no longer saw a reason to patronize the area, and it subsequently declined. The community has been described as "rurban", a mix of urban and rural characteristics, due to its sparse population brought about by its isolation, both geographically and socially, from the rest of Houston, only made worse since the loop was built. Today, the community remains poor with a declining population.

* Galena Park - Another small city and practical enclave of Houston, located directly to the south of Jacinto City, which it is physically adjacent to. Transformed from a farming and ranching town by the coming of the Port of Houston directly to the south of it and the later arrival of the oil refineries, it too has become a bedroom community for workers. Originally, prior to incorporation, the community was known as Clinton. However, when attempts to get a post office were stymied due to a Clinton, Texas already existing, the city changed its name to Galena Park, after the Galena Signal Oil Company which built the first refinery in town. The city incorporated in 1935 before Houston could annex it, thus Houston just annexed everything around it. Unfortunately, the city's economy has tanked in recent years, primarily due to the 9/11 Attacks leading to increased port security which limited sailors ability to leave ships docked at port. Originally, the community was nearly all white and due to it being located directly adjacent to the entirely African American community of Clinton Park in Houston, the border between Galena Park and Clinton Park was entirely barricaded, and it remains so even now, an unfortunate holdover from the segregation era, though Galena Park is now mostly Latino and Hispanic.

* The Woodlands -Large, very affluent community well north of Greenspoint. Houston has attempted to annex this neighborhood in the past but has been constantly rebuffed. Houston has recently agreed to not annex the master-planned community for a few decades, in the meantime allowing The Woodlands to potentially incorporate itself (while agreeing to payoff Houston for the lack of incorporation).
* Shenadoah - The sister community to The Woodlands, and an incorporated town. Not to be confused with the neighborhood inside Gulfton in Southwest Houston, between Bellaire and Sharpstown.

* ''Film/FridayNightLights'' has the state football championship played at the Astrodome, though the events upon which the film is based never went anywhere near Houston: the title game that year was not played in the Astrodome.[[note]]On top of this, the final game of the real-life 1988 Permian High School team upon which the film was based was a state ''semifinal'' held in Austin.[[/note]]

* Creator/JenniferGarner – born in Houston, but grew up in West Virginia
* Creator/AdamGibbs - born in Athens, TX but relocated in in Houston

* Music/KellyRowland - born in and originally from UsefulNotes/{{Atlanta}}, relocated to Houston when she was around7 or 8.

* Music/{{Jandek}}, that [[ReclusiveArtist reclusive]] [[OutsiderMusic Outsider Musician]] and [[CultClassic almost-legendary]] purveyor of [[MindScrew the bizarre]], is from Neartown. [[MultipleChoicePast Maybe]].

Entertainment and tourist attractions-wise, despite its size, Houston tends to lack much in the way of major theme parks and entertainment options. The city's major theme park, Ride/SixFlags [=AstroWorld=], was closed in 2005 after years of poor maintenance and declining attendance, and most attempts to have another theme park in the city following it usually wound up in DevelopmentHell. Other attempts to start up a theme park in the city back in the seventies however, such as Busch Gardens Houston and Creator/HannaBarbera Land would also fail miserably and close after a couple of years for much of the same reasons. There are smaller amusement centers in nearby Galveston and Kemah, but you'll have to drive on over to San Antonio or Dallas if you want to hit up a full blown amusement park. Most entertainment options in the city tend to be more low key and aimed more at locals instead, such as the Houston Zoo and the various museums scattered around memorial park, the Houston Space Center at NASA and a couple of smaller parks such as the indoor park Funplex (which has gained an infamous reputation amongst natives after the '80s for being a rundown CrappyCarnival) and the resident water park, Six Flags Hurricane Harbor Splashtown.

Entertainment and tourist attractions-wise, despite its size, Houston tends to lack much in the way of major theme parks and has gained a reputation for being more of a business-oriented BoringButPractical city rather than a "fun" and touristy city. The city's major theme park, Ride/SixFlags [=AstroWorld=], was closed in 2005 after years of poor maintenance and declining attendance, and most attempts to have another theme park in the city following it usually wound up in DevelopmentHell. Other attempts to start up a theme park in the city such as Busch Gardens Houston and Creator/HannaBarbera Land would also fail miserably and close after a couple of years for much of the same reasons. There are smaller amusement centers in nearby Galveston and Kemah, but you'll have to drive on over to San Antonio or Dallas if you want to hit up a full blown amusement park. Most entertainment options in the city tend to be more low key and aimed more at locals instead, such as the Houston Zoo and the various museums scattered around memorial park, the Houston Space Center at NASA and a couple of smaller parks such as the indoor park Funplex (which has gained an infamous reputation over the years for being a rundown CrappyCarnival) and the resident water park, Splashtown, which took over the aforementioned Hanna-Barbera Land in 1984 and has gone through several owners (the current being Six Flags).

Entertainment-wise, the city's major theme park, Ride/SixFlags [=AstroWorld=], was closed in 2005 after years of poor maintenance and declining attendance. There are smaller amusement centers in nearby Galveston and Kemah, but you'll have to drive on over to San Antonio or Dallas if you want to hit up a full blown amusement park.

* ''Roleplay/RedDawnPlus20'' - Houston becomes the capital of the OccupiedStatesOfAmerica until its liberation during Operation LONG RIFLE.

* Northside Village - Residential area east of The Heights and directly north of Downtown. One of Houston's many majority-Hispanic communities, it's something of a mixed-bag; the western side is moderately middle-class and looks like an extension of the Heights, but the farther east you go, the more run-down it gets. As of 2022, the main drag up Elysian looks a bit like the Heights after a ZombieApocalypse, and there don't appear to be any attempts at gentrification anytime soon[[note]]This might be starting to change, though; the Elysian Viaduct has been under construction since 2017, and changes are finally starting to come, slowly but surely[[/note]]. Most of Northside's eastern third or so is occupied by a massive Industrial Park, contributing to the decidedly blue-collar feel of the neighborhood. Additionally, the Saint Arnold Brewing Company has a brewery here due north of Downtown.

* Rice Village - A small shopping district located just West of Rice University. A dense and well known retail location, it is a culinary madhouse, with various restaurants, including [[UptoEleven three French, two Japanese, two Chinese, two Italian, two Turkish, one Mexican, two Spanish, one Mediterranean, one Vietnamese, two Indian, and three Thai restaurants as well as sandwich shops, delicatessens, and specialty food and beverage stores]].

* River Oaks - Another affluent community just affronting Buffalo Bayou and Memorial Park. This community is not only one of the richest in Houston, but one of the richest in the entire United States [[UpToEleven as well as the entire world]] and has been so for years. Homes here start at $1 million and go up in value. World renowned River Oaks Country Club is located in this community, but don't expect to become a member unless you're white. This community also includes the River Oaks Shopping Center on West Gray St that features two notable landmarks. One is the River Oaks Theatre, one of the three central neighborhood movie palaces from the early to mid 20th century (the Alabama down Shepherd south and the Bellaire in Southside Place/West University Place were the others), and this theater is the only one of the three still open (Alabama closed in 1984, Bellaire closed in 1992). It is now an arthouse cinema. This center is also infamous for featuring two Starbucks across West Gray from each other; these coffeehouses were the direct inspiration for Creator/LewisBlack's "Starbucks" rant (there are now '''three''' Starbucks with a Barnes & Noble bookstore built a block over after the Alabama's bookstore closed (Barnes & Noble serves Starbucks coffees in their cafes).