History UsefulNotes / BDSM

23rd Mar '18 2:23:35 AM TroperNo9001
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Non-sexual bondage is a rarer form of BDSM, and can be considered platonic or romantic. Some may consider non-sexual bondage a lesser form of play, but this is not true.. If it is neither sexual nor consensual, it's kidnapping. If it's sexual but not consensual, it's sexual assault, and possibly also kidnapping.

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Non-sexual bondage is a rarer form of BDSM, and can be considered platonic or romantic. Some may consider non-sexual bondage a lesser form of play, but this is not true..true. If it is neither sexual nor consensual, it's kidnapping. If it's sexual but not consensual, it's sexual assault, and possibly also kidnapping.
27th Nov '17 12:03:34 PM Monolaf317
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A century later, these words had picked up some quite different and quite negative meanings. "Sadism" was used as a generic slur for being a malicious JerkAss or utter monster who enjoys making others suffer, while "masochism" was used as a similar slur to brand people as self-destructive. A popular excuse for refusing to help victims of DomesticAbuse was to brand them "masochists", implying that they merely pretended to not enjoy the beatings, just to get attention. These days, these creepy secondary meanings are losing power as ''actual'' sadism and masochism is becoming more and more socially accepted.

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A century later, these words had picked up some quite different and quite negative meanings. "Sadism" was used as a generic slur for being a malicious JerkAss {{Jerkass}} or utter monster who enjoys making others suffer, while "masochism" was used as a similar slur to brand people as self-destructive. A popular excuse for refusing to help victims of DomesticAbuse was to brand them "masochists", implying that they merely pretended to not enjoy the beatings, just to get attention. These days, these creepy secondary meanings are losing power as ''actual'' sadism and masochism is becoming more and more socially accepted.















28th Oct '17 3:04:44 PM Slysheen
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When executed properly, BDSM is can be free from risk of disease/infection and unwanted pregnancies. Of course, that "executed properly" thing can add a lot of fine print: you have to not combine it with intercourse or use proper protection if you do; you have to avoid breaking the skin or combine it with intercourse; you must be careful with blood circulation, respiratory systems, and not hitting any vulnerable areas such as over the kidneys. Most importantly, don't use comic books and similar fiction as instruction manuals: See the CommonHollywoodSexTraits list.

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When executed properly, BDSM is can be free from risk of disease/infection and unwanted pregnancies. Of course, that "executed properly" thing can add a lot of fine print: you have to not combine it with intercourse or use proper protection if you do; you have to avoid breaking the skin or combine it with intercourse; you must be careful with blood circulation, respiratory systems, and not hitting any vulnerable areas such as over the kidneys. Most importantly, don't use comic books and similar fiction as instruction manuals: See the CommonHollywoodSexTraits list.
30th Sep '17 5:11:42 PM aurorasanders
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To be Bondage, it has to be sexual and consensual.

If it is consensual but not sexual, it may be considered a less committed form of "play". If it is neither sexual nor consensual, it's kidnapping. If it's sexual but not consensual, it's sexual assault, and possibly also kidnapping.

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To be Bondage, it Bondage has to be sexual consensual, but may not necessarily be sexual.

Non-sexual bondage is a rarer form of BDSM,
and consensual.

If it is consensual but not sexual, it may
can be considered platonic or romantic. Some may consider non-sexual bondage a less committed lesser form of "play".play, but this is not true.. If it is neither sexual nor consensual, it's kidnapping. If it's sexual but not consensual, it's sexual assault, and possibly also kidnapping.
19th Jan '17 7:22:59 PM flarn2006
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If it is consensual but not sexual, it may be considered a less committed form of "play". If it is neither sexual nor consensual, it's kidnapping. If it's sexual but not consensual, it's kidnapping, sexual assault, or both.

to:

If it is consensual but not sexual, it may be considered a less committed form of "play". If it is neither sexual nor consensual, it's kidnapping. If it's sexual but not consensual, it's kidnapping, sexual assault, or both.
and possibly also kidnapping.
9th Sep '16 1:31:26 PM imadmagician
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BDSM is gender neutral. The Dominant may be male or female, and may be hetero-, homo-, or bisexual. So may the submissive. Additionally, they have this dynamic because they ''want'' to and ''choose'' to, not because they have been taught that "it's the way it's supposed to be" (ie LieBackAndThinkOfEngland). Finally, they have detailed options for what parts of their relationship is or isn't included in the dominance. For example, it's very common that the Dominant has no say over the submissive's professional life -- especially since many sexual submissives are very dominant career people in their professional lives.

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BDSM is gender neutral. The Dominant may be male or female, and may be hetero-, homo-, or bisexual. So bisexual, and so may the submissive.submissive, averting the AllWomenAreDomsAllMenAreSubs trope. Additionally, they have this dynamic because they ''want'' to and ''choose'' to, not because they have been taught that "it's the way it's supposed to be" (ie LieBackAndThinkOfEngland). Finally, they have detailed options for what parts of their relationship is or isn't included in the dominance. For example, it's very common that the Dominant has no say over the submissive's professional life -- especially since many sexual submissives are very dominant career people in their professional lives.
6th Jan '16 3:28:52 PM Eievie
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BDSM is gender neutral. The Dominant may be male or female, and may be hetero-, homo-, or bisexual. So may the submissive. Additionally, they have this dynamic because they ''want'' to and ''choose'' to, not because they have been taught that "it's the way it's supposed to be" (IE LieBackAndThinkOfEngland). Finally, they have detailed options for what parts of their relationship is or isn't included in the dominance. For example, it's very common that the Dominant has no say over the submissive's professional life - especially since many sexual submissives are very dominant career people in their professional lives.

to:

BDSM is gender neutral. The Dominant may be male or female, and may be hetero-, homo-, or bisexual. So may the submissive. Additionally, they have this dynamic because they ''want'' to and ''choose'' to, not because they have been taught that "it's the way it's supposed to be" (IE (ie LieBackAndThinkOfEngland). Finally, they have detailed options for what parts of their relationship is or isn't included in the dominance. For example, it's very common that the Dominant has no say over the submissive's professional life - -- especially since many sexual submissives are very dominant career people in their professional lives.



A masochist wants to experience pain - of the right kind, from the right person, in the right context. It can take the form of spankings, whippings, hot candle wax, or whatever. (This is where "TooKinkyToTorture" comes from.) If the person who provides these experiences is also enjoying the session, then this person is called a "sadist". These people typically combine their sadism with empathy and ethics, and are thus not dangerous or destructive in any way. However, a person who is a sexual sadist ''and'' a psychopath is [[TheSociopath an entirely different matter]].

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A masochist wants to experience pain - -- of the right kind, from the right person, in the right context. It can take the form of spankings, whippings, hot candle wax, or whatever. (This is where "TooKinkyToTorture" comes from.) If the person who provides these experiences is also enjoying the session, then this person is called a "sadist". These people typically combine their sadism with empathy and ethics, and are thus not dangerous or destructive in any way. However, a person who is a sexual sadist ''and'' a psychopath is [[TheSociopath an entirely different matter]].



Most people who enjoy BDSM can enjoy vanilla intercourse as well. For some, guilt doesn't come into it either way. For others, submission is a way of escaping sexual guilt: by taking the role of the innocent victim, they can enjoy the sex without feeling like a slut. For yet others, guilt doesn't come into it naturally, but they ''choose'' to cultivate a sense of guilt and make up excuses for why they deserve to be "punished" - not out of any actual guilt, but simply because they enjoy it. Compare with civilians who are peaceful or even {{Actual Pacifist}}s, but enjoy taking on the role of bloodthirsty world-conquering emperors in various strategy computer games, reveling in the sociopathy because their fellow players don't sustain any ''actual'' trauma from having their virtual citizens slaughtered.

to:

Most people who enjoy BDSM can enjoy vanilla intercourse as well. For some, guilt doesn't come into it either way. For others, submission is a way of escaping sexual guilt: by taking the role of the innocent victim, they can enjoy the sex without feeling like a slut. For yet others, guilt doesn't come into it naturally, but they ''choose'' to cultivate a sense of guilt and make up excuses for why they deserve to be "punished" - -- not out of any actual guilt, but simply because they enjoy it. Compare with civilians who are peaceful or even {{Actual Pacifist}}s, but enjoy taking on the role of bloodthirsty world-conquering emperors in various strategy computer games, reveling in the sociopathy because their fellow players don't sustain any ''actual'' trauma from having their virtual citizens slaughtered.



Also, the human brain tends to enjoy having its systems exercised. If our jobs don't include physical labor, we start going to the gym. We eat sour and bitter candy, in spite of those taste receptors originally evolving to warn us from spoiled or poisonous food. We don't like food that's ''that'' sour or bitter, but a bit of sourness or bitterness is good. Likewise, no one enjoys [[{{Kneecapping}} a hammer to the kneecaps]] - but some people do enjoy a spanking. Along this line, being used to a bit of pain can for some people make the bad kinds of pain more bearable.

to:

Also, the human brain tends to enjoy having its systems exercised. If our jobs don't include physical labor, we start going to the gym. We eat sour and bitter candy, in spite of those taste receptors originally evolving to warn us from spoiled or poisonous food. We don't like food that's ''that'' sour or bitter, but a bit of sourness or bitterness is good. Likewise, no one enjoys [[{{Kneecapping}} a hammer to the kneecaps]] - -- but some people do enjoy a spanking. Along this line, being used to a bit of pain can for some people make the bad kinds of pain more bearable.
4th Jan '16 5:40:14 PM CharacterInWhite
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If it is consensual but not sexual, it's just a game or something. If it is neither sexual nor consensual, it's kidnapping. If it's sexual but not consensual, it's kidnapping, sexual assault, or both.

to:

If it is consensual but not sexual, it's just it may be considered a game or something.less committed form of "play". If it is neither sexual nor consensual, it's kidnapping. If it's sexual but not consensual, it's kidnapping, sexual assault, or both.
26th Aug '15 2:13:47 AM LondonKdS
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Portraying a character’s interest in BDSM can be done in three different tones of voice: It can be portrayed as [[BrainsAndBondage something positive]], [[CasualKink something neutral]] (usually for comedic effect, toying with expected prejudices in the audience), or as [[BondageIsBad something negative and maybe “perverted”]]. Sometimes, people into BDSM gets the role of SubcultureOfTheWeek.

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Portraying a character’s Fictional portrayals of people into BDSM often fall into the traditional BondageIsBad, where sexual kinkiness is depicted as just one of the symptoms of someone's gross moral depravity, or the more recent BrainsAndBondage, which depicts intelligent and educated people as kinky (this may or may not be true, but "scene" BDSM activity is more often found among society's more privileged classes due to [[CrackIsCheaper the expense]] of much of the costumes and equipment involved). As it has become more accepted in society, more works have started depicting CasualKink, where someone's BDSM interest in BDSM can be done in three different tones of voice: It can be portrayed as [[BrainsAndBondage something positive]], [[CasualKink something neutral]] (usually for comedic effect, toying with expected prejudices in the audience), is acknowledged without conveying any strong characterisational or as [[BondageIsBad something negative and maybe “perverted”]]. moral message. Sometimes, people into BDSM gets get the role of SubcultureOfTheWeek.
14th Jun '15 3:00:10 PM KingClark
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[[MathematiciansAnswer Fun.]]

But seriously, BDSM is a wide range of consensual activities that are either sexual or indirectly connected to sexuality.

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[[MathematiciansAnswer Fun.]]

But seriously,
BDSM is a wide range of consensual activities that are either sexual or indirectly connected to sexuality.
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