History Quotes / TopGear

5th May '16 1:18:57 PM aye_amber
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'''May''': [''singing''] [[BeachBoys I'll take you anywhere you want to go, I'll ride my Honda tonight...]]\\

to:

'''May''': [''singing''] [[BeachBoys [[Music/TheBeachBoys I'll take you anywhere you want to go, I'll ride my Honda tonight...]]\\
9th Mar '16 7:19:20 PM stewbacca94
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[''laughter'']

to:

[''laughter''][''laughter'']\\
9th Mar '16 7:18:47 PM stewbacca94
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to:

'''Clarkson''': It was a stroke of genius! I knew that guys would go for the V8 thing.
8th Sep '15 12:14:53 PM FELH2
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--> '''Hammond''': I just realized something. It probably looks as though I'm driving along huddled in a towel trying to keep warm and dry because the window won't shut and its letting rain in but that's not the case. The window's open because it's so warm and a little bit of drizzle, let's not call it rain, is keeping me cool.

to:

--> '''Hammond''': I just realized something. It probably looks as though I'm driving along huddled in a towel trying to keep warm and dry because the window won't shut and its it's letting rain in but that's not the case. The window's open because it's so warm and a little bit of drizzle, let's not call it rain, is keeping me cool.
8th Feb '15 2:32:51 PM maxwellsilver
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to:

**
--> '''Jeremy:''' It was PJ O'Rourke, the American author, who first noticed that hire cars are the fastest cars in the world. He is, of course, completely correct, because when was the last time you took your car to the redline? Or you drove it flat out? Never. But here, in this, now, ''yeees'', because it isn't mine.
8th Feb '15 2:17:02 PM maxwellsilver
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Added DiffLines:

[[folder:Series 20]]

* Episode 1
--> '''Jeremy:''' I do realize the enormity of the challenge I face, which is why I have gone for the fastest car in the world. Here it is. ''[gestures to blue Toyota Corolla]''
--> '''James:''' It's a Toyota Corolla.
--> '''Jeremy:''' Yes it is.
--> '''James:''' It's a 1.8 litre Toyota Corolla.
--> '''Jeremy:''' Engine size is irrelevant, James, because do you know what makes this so fast? Look in the window. ''[camera zooms in on Avis Preferred Service tag on mirror]'' I've rented it!
--> '''James:''' Oh no.
--> '''Jeremy:''' ''Yes.'' And this is the thing, with the Bugatti Veyron sometimes you're using 15 horsepower, sometimes you're only using ten. This, you've got 140 horsepower from the moment you start it up to the moment you crash it.
--> '''James:''' Did you pick up one of those, what do they call them, collision damage waiver forms?
--> '''Jeremy:''' No, I picked up six.

[[/folder]]
9th Nov '14 1:18:49 AM JakesBrain
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'''James:''' Come on! Nobody gives a pigs arse about all that diesel stuff. (Crowd Laughs) Its the new XJ; the important question is Is it a proper Jag?\\
'''Jeremy:''' Now what you mean is Is this car slightly caddish? Is that what you actually mean?\\
'''James:''' ''(nods)'' Yes.\\
'''Jeremy:''' Is the person who drives it a bit... um, whats the word? Im not quite sure how to sum it up, but its the sort of person who would go away for a weekend with his wife to a hotel, to some romantic place, and spends the entire night... flirting outrageusly with the waitress. And its okay because hes got a ''Jaaaaag.''\\
''(Everyone laughs)''\\
'''Richard:''' Thats the Jag driver; hed get away with anything! (Changes tone) Im terribly sorry, I ran over your dog. (Whimpers) ...in my ''Jaaaaag.''\\
''(Crowd laughs)''\\
'''James:''' Is it fair to say? Do you think that no ''Jaaaaag'' driver is ever entirely trustworthy, but its in a really nice likeable way?\\
'''Jeremy:''' Yes! If you would go to a prison, forget the sort of "stabbists", and you know the stranglers. The ones who are in there for a bit of Tax Dodging...\\
''(Richard Laughs)''\\

to:

'''James:''' Come on! Nobody gives a pigs arse about all that diesel stuff. (Crowd Laughs) ''[crowd laughs]'' Its the new XJ; the important question is Is "Is it a proper Jag?\\
Jag?"\\
'''Jeremy:''' Now what you mean is Is "Is this car slightly caddish? caddish?" Is that what you actually mean?\\
'''James:''' ''(nods)'' ''[nods]'' Yes.\\
'''Jeremy:''' Is the person who drives it a bit... um, whats the word? Im I'm not quite sure how to sum it up, but its the sort of person who would go away for a weekend with his wife to a hotel, to some romantic place, and spends the entire night... flirting outrageusly outrageously with the waitress. And its okay because hes got a ''Jaaaaag.''\\
''(Everyone laughs)''\\
''[Everyone laughs]''\\
'''Richard:''' Thats the Jag driver; hed you can get away with anything! (Changes tone) Im "Im terribly sorry, I ran over your dog. (Whimpers) ...in dog." "''[Whimpers]'' Oh..." "In my ''Jaaaaag.''\\
''(Crowd laughs)''\\
''" "''[Shrugs]'' Oh! Well, then."\\
''[Crowd laughs]''\\
'''James:''' Is it fair to say? Do you think say, d'you think, that no ''Jaaaaag'' driver is ever entirely trustworthy, but its in a really nice nice, likeable way?\\
'''Jeremy:''' Yes! If you would go to a prison, forget the sort of "stabbists", and you know the stranglers. The ones who are in there for a bit of Tax Dodging...\\
''(Richard Laughs)''\\
''tax dodging--''\\
'''Richard:''' ''[laughs]''\\



'''Jeremy:''' ''(faces the crowd behind him)'' I bet eighty percent have got ''Jaaaaags.'' ''(Crowd laughs)'' You know what I mean now?\\

to:

'''Jeremy:''' ''(faces ''[faces the crowd behind him)'' him]'' I bet eighty percent have got ''Jaaaaags.'' ''(Crowd laughs)'' ''[Crowd laughs]'' You know what I mean now?\\



'''Jeremy:''' You got a Jag? Who heres got a Jag? (Stands up then points at someone who responded) You got a Jag? Look at him!\\
''(Audience laughs)''\\

to:

'''Jeremy:''' You got a Jag? Who heres got a Jag? (Stands up ''[Stands up, then points at someone who responded) You responded]'' You've got a Jag? Look ''Look'' at him!\\
''(Audience laughs)''\\''[Audience laughs]''\\



'''Jeremy:''' He goes away with a sort of girl for a weekend, and then goes... Awfully sorry...\\
'''Richard:''' ... bit of an issue with the wallet.\\
'''Jeremy:''' Would you mind awfully settling this while I go warm up the ''Jaaaaag?''\\

to:

'''Jeremy:''' He goes away with a sort of girl for a weekend, and then goes... Awfully goes: ''[feeling his pockets; weaselly grin]'' "Awfully sorry...\\
'''Richard:''' ... bit
"\\
'''Richard:''' "Bit
of an issue with the wallet.\\
"\\
'''Jeremy:''' Would "Would you mind awfully settling this while I go warm up the ''Jaaaaag?''\\''Jaaaaag?''"\\



'''May''': Actually, that's not the worst bit about those six-seater cars, 'cause it could be worse if you had your wife in the front and ''both'' daughters, and you sat in the back.\\

to:

'''May''': Actually, that's not the worst bit about those six-seater cars, 'cause it could be worse if you had your wife in the front and ''both'' daughters, and you ''you'' sat in the back.\\



'''Clarkson''': ''(Roars with laugher, nearly falls off his chair. General laughter from audience.)''\\

to:

'''Clarkson''': ''(Roars with laugher, ''(Bursts into laughter, nearly falls off his chair. General laughter from audience.)''\\



-->'''Clarkson''': [''driving through the countryside, intercut with shots of flying clouds, [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aKw5mbcE7VY beautiful but wistful music]] mingling with the sound of a well-tuned V12''] Weeeellll, it's an Aston Martin Vantage with a V12 engine... so what do you think it's going to be like? It is fantastic. It's wonderful, wonderful, wonderful. [''voiceover''] What it makes me feel, though, is sad. [''aloud'']I just can't help thinking that, thanks to all sorts of things: the environment, the economy, problems in the Middle East, the relentless War on Speed, cars like this will soon be consigned to the history books. I just have this horrible, dreadful feeling that what I'm driving here is an ending. [''to the camera''] Goodnight. \\

to:

-->'''Clarkson''': [''driving through the countryside, intercut with shots of flying clouds, [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aKw5mbcE7VY beautiful but wistful music]] mingling with the sound of a well-tuned V12''] Weeeellll, it's an Aston Martin Vantage with a V12 engine... so what do you think it's going to be like? It is fantastic. It's wonderful, wonderful, wonderful. [''voiceover''] What it makes me feel, though, is sad. [''aloud'']I just can't help thinking that, thanks to all sorts of things: the environment, the economy, problems in the Middle East, the relentless War on Speed, cars like this will soon be consigned to the history books. I just have this horrible, dreadful feeling that what I'm driving here here... is an ending. [''to the camera''] Goodnight. \\
28th Oct '14 7:18:51 PM K2NR
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'''Clarkson''': "Some say that his hair is the exact same shape as a hat... and that if he had been [[Creator/PiersMorgan employed by CNN]], [[TakeThat he wouldn't have gotten such]] ''[[TakeThat pitifully low ratings]]'' [[TakeThat that his show would get cancelled.]]" ''(smug smile)''

to:

'''Clarkson''': "Some say that his hair is the exact same shape as a hat... and that if he had been [[Creator/PiersMorgan employed by worked for CNN]], [[TakeThat he wouldn't have gotten get such]] ''[[TakeThat pitifully low ratings]]'' [[TakeThat that his show would get got cancelled.]]" ''(smug smile)''
14th Aug '14 10:29:20 PM nomuru2d
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14th Aug '14 10:29:03 PM nomuru2d
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-->'''Clarkson''': I know ''exactly'' what music we have to play now...\\

to:

-->'''Clarkson''': '''Clarkson''': I know ''exactly'' what music we have to play now...\\



-->'''Clarkson''': [[NoNotThat No, Not that!]] [[MediumAwareness Cue the]] [[Franchise/JamesBond Bond]]!

to:

-->'''Clarkson''': '''Clarkson''': [[NoNotThat No, Not that!]] [[MediumAwareness Cue the]] [[Franchise/JamesBond Bond]]!
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