History Quotes / FamilyUnFriendlyAesop

30th Oct '16 6:31:03 PM rjd1922
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->That's right, kids. Don't call 911 if you're being attacked by people who want to kill or kidnap you. Only call for important things, like if your cable goes out and you can't watch ''The WesternAnimation/AdventuresOfSonicTheHedgehog''. That's what's important!
-->-- '''WebVideo/TheNostalgiaCritic'''



-->-- '''WebVideo/TheNostalgiaCritic''', on ''Pound Puppies And The Legend Of Big Paw''

to:

-->-- '''WebVideo/TheNostalgiaCritic''', on ''Pound Puppies And The Legend Of Big Paw''
''WesternAnimation/PoundPuppiesAndTheLegendOfBigPaw''
5th Oct '16 5:05:34 PM MeekGazelle
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->'''[[WebVideo/YouCanPlayThis JewWario]]:''' Do ya hear that, kids? Reckless endangerment is okay, as long as you're following your heart.
->'''[[WebVideo/ThatDudeInTheSuede Suede]]:''' ''To your death!'' It's the only way you'll be a Pokémon Master!
-->-- '''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ca7NWeTEzGM Suede, Linkara and JewWario]]''' review ''Anime/PokemonTheFirstMovie''
12th Jun '16 9:50:58 PM HiJac210
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->'''Lois:''' You know, I hope you are at least learning something from all of this.\\
'''Dewey:''' Yeah. If you do something bad, don't tell!
-->--''Series/MalcolmInTheMiddle, Lois Vs. Evil''
21st Mar '16 1:39:33 PM Wildstar93
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->Remember kids, you can talk to your dogs! If for some reason it doesn't work, there's something wrong with you! You should be ashamed of yourself and feel totally awful that you are unable to enjoy your dog! Sorry, we don't know what the fuck's wrong with you. Maybe you're just an idiot.
-->-- '''WebVideo/TheNostalgiaCritic''', on ''Pound Puppies And The Legend Of Big Paw''
5th Feb '16 5:18:09 AM hamonrye
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->[eulogizing] Big Jim was a mentor to me. When I was a kid, he caught me stealin' hubcaps off his car; he said, 'Hubcaps? Kid, don't waste your time stealing the hubcaps -- steal the whole car.

to:

->[eulogizing] Big Jim was a mentor to me. When I was a kid, he caught me stealin' hubcaps off his car; he said, 'Hubcaps? Kid, don't waste your time stealing the hubcaps -- steal the whole car.'
17th Nov '15 6:36:05 PM Mr.Movie
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[[folder: Literature]]
->''"... I leave it to be settled by whomsoever it may concern, whether the tendency of this work be altogether to recommend parental tyranny, or reward filial disobedience."''
-->-- '''Creator/JaneAusten''', ''Literature/NorthangerAbbey'' (final line)

[[/folder]]
10th Nov '15 4:52:25 PM hamonrye
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->Peppermint Patty gets quoted for "The world is full of beautiful plants and flowers, but I'm just an ugly weed. I'm a poor ugly weed trying to push her way up through the sidewalk of life!" That is linked to the uplifting message ď"Be Real." Ah, [[BeautyEqualsGoodness the negative self image is a virtue!]]

to:

->Peppermint Patty gets quoted for "The world is full of beautiful plants and flowers, but I'm just an ugly weed. I'm a poor ugly weed trying to push her way up through the sidewalk of life!" That is linked to the uplifting message ď"Be Real." Ah, [[BeautyEqualsGoodness ->Ah, the negative self image [[BeautyEqualsGoodness is a virtue!]]



->Donít be too quick to thank a soldier today, America: you could be talking to one of the really shitty ones! This is your Veteranís Day message from ''ComicStrip/BeetleBailey'', Americaís foremost military-themed comic strip.
-->--'''''Blog/TheComicsCurmudgeon''''', [[http://joshreads.com/?p=23579 "Man, ouch for that toupee, amiright"]]



''Monopoly made the child grow up to be a CEO who also thought he was a car.''

to:

''Monopoly ''Ex: Monopoly made the child grow up to be a CEO who also thought he was a car.''



->When Lisa vows sheíll never take a stupid risk ever again, Homer slams the brakes and informs her otherwise, claiming that stupid risks make life worth living, and thatís why he has so many crazy adventures. So yeah, instead of being an average American man who has dramatic and absurd scenarios befall him (which is part of the reason why theyíre funny), now heís Captain Wacky, [[LeeroyJenkins actively doing stupid things on impulse]].
-->--'''[[http://meblogwritegood.wordpress.com/2012/03/31/202-lost-our-lisa/ Mike Amato]]''', WesternAnimation/TheSimpsons



->Donít be too quick to thank a soldier today, America: you could be talking to one of the really shitty ones! This is your Veteranís Day message from ''ComicStrip/BeetleBailey'', Americaís foremost military-themed comic strip.
-->--'''''Blog/TheComicsCurmudgeon''''', [[http://joshreads.com/?p=23579 "Man, ouch for that toupee, amiright"]]

->If you come across a damsel in distress, [[WoundedGazelleGambit surprise, she's not]]. She wanted you to come close so she could yank you off your horse and ride away laughing... The first time a woman in ''[[VideoGame/RedDeadRedemption Red Dead]]'' did this to me, I shot her off and [[ThereIsNoKillLikeOverkill started putting every bullet I owned into her face.]] Faces don't even have a word for what I did to her. About 20 bullets in, my girlfriend woke up from her nap and asked what the hell I was doing. I explained that I wanted everyone, even the coyotes eating this bitch's remains to [[MakeAnExampleOfThem know the penalty for horse thievin']]. She mumbled something about crazy, but I wasn't listening. Paying attention to women was how I got into this whole corpse-mutilating pickle in the first place.

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->Donít ->''"While it might be reasonable to argue about the morality of developing something like the atom bomb or biological weapons, it seems facile to suggest that [[TheWorldIsNotReady the worldís population is too quick dumb to thank a soldier today, America: you could be talking to one survive]] the introduction of an engine that can run on water...''Like Water for Octane'' turns the Lone Gunmen into knock-off versions of the really shitty ones! This is your Veteranís Day message from ''ComicStrip/BeetleBailey'', Americaís foremost military-themed comic strip.
-->--'''''Blog/TheComicsCurmudgeon''''', [[http://joshreads.com/?p=23579 "Man, ouch for that toupee, amiright"]]

Cigarette-Smoking Man, making many of the same arguments he has used to justify his secrets. In a way, this speaks to a conservatism at the heart of ''The Lone Gunmen.''"''
-->--'''[[http://them0vieblog.com/2015/11/10/the-lone-gunmen-like-water-for-octane-review Darren Mooney]]''' on ''Series/TheLoneGunmen'', "Like Water For Octane"

->If you come across a damsel in distress, [[WoundedGazelleGambit surprise, she's not]].not. She wanted you to come close so she could yank you off your horse and ride away laughing... The first time a woman in ''[[VideoGame/RedDeadRedemption Red Dead]]'' did this to me, I shot her off and [[ThereIsNoKillLikeOverkill started putting every bullet I owned into her face.]] face. Faces don't even have a word for what I did to her. About 20 bullets in, my girlfriend woke up from her nap and asked what the hell I was doing. I explained that I wanted everyone, even the coyotes eating this bitch's remains to [[MakeAnExampleOfThem know the penalty for horse thievin']]. She mumbled something about crazy, but I wasn't listening. Paying attention to women was how I got into this whole corpse-mutilating pickle in the first place.



->Yes people, if you are dying of cancer itís only because you people donít [[ClapYourHandsIfYouBelieve BELIEVE]] enough. Oh and doctors like [Woody] Harrelsonís character that want to cure people and heal them; they are [[ScienceIsBad the REAL problem]]. Donít be fooled, they are the ones really making you sick. Can you really think of anything more grotesque or malicious? Saying the Haitians made a deal with the devil is pretty bad not quite in my opinion. It is moronic but [[http://americanloons.blogspot.com/2012/06/338-pat-robertson.html coming from the source]] you are not surprised. You are surprised when you are [[{{Anvilicious}} torpedoed by the message]] of ''The Sunchaser''.

to:

->Yes people, if you are dying of cancer itís only because you people donít [[ClapYourHandsIfYouBelieve BELIEVE]] BELIEVE enough. Oh and doctors like [Woody] Harrelsonís character that want to cure people and heal them; they are [[ScienceIsBad the REAL problem]]. Donít be fooled, they are the ones really making you sick. Can you really think of anything more grotesque or malicious? Saying the Haitians made a deal with the devil is pretty bad not quite in my opinion. It is moronic but [[http://americanloons.blogspot.com/2012/06/338-pat-robertson.html coming from the source]] you are not surprised. You are surprised when you are [[{{Anvilicious}} torpedoed by the message]] message of ''The Sunchaser''.
7th Nov '15 10:45:02 PM nombretomado
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-->-- '''Church''', ''RedVsBlue''

to:

-->-- '''Church''', ''RedVsBlue''
''Machinima/RedVsBlue''
25th Jul '15 8:40:47 PM johnnyfog
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->Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. ''Don't'' teach a man to fish, and you feed yourself. He's a grown man. Fishing's not that hard.
-->--'''[[Series/ParksAndRecreation Ron Swanson]]'''
31st May '15 2:22:59 AM RobTan
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->Man, revenge is underrated, that felt awesome!
-->-- '''Dipper Pines''', ''WesternAnimation/GravityFalls''
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