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->"''My Day With D: A disturbing true-life look at America's underground bummer culture''. Recently I spent an entire day hanging out with a disturbing girl I shall refer to only as 'D'. Unenthusiastic, unpopular, cynical D just doesn't understand how great it is to be a teen. In fact, she may be the 'anti-teen'."
-->-- '''Val's article about Daria'''
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->'''Daria:''' Okay. But you know what I've been hearing all week? 'You know how I feel Daria, you're gloomy.' 'I knew I could talk to you Daria, you're always miserable.' Tragedy hits the school and everyone thinks of me. The popular guy died and now I'm popular because I'm 'the misery chick.' But I'm not miserable! I'm just not like them.
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->'''Daria:''' If you play that Music/JohnLennon song backwards it says "[[Music/{{Imagine}} Imagine all the people...]] [WaxingLyrical browsing in a mall]]". Isn't that weird?
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->'''Daria:''' If you play that Music/JohnLennon song backwards it says "[[Music/{{Imagine}} Imagine all the people...]] [WaxingLyrical [[WaxingLyrical browsing in a mall]]". Isn't that weird?
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->'''Daria:''' If you play that John Lennon song backwards it says "Imagine all the people... browsing in a mall". Isn't that weird?
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->'''Daria:''' If you play that John Lennon Music/JohnLennon song backwards it says "Imagine "[[Music/{{Imagine}} Imagine all the people... people...]] [WaxingLyrical browsing in a mall".mall]]". Isn't that weird?
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->'''Speaker:''' Daria... what about your goals?
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->'''Speaker:''' Daria... what about your goals?goal?
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->'''Speaker:''' Daria... what about your goals?
->'''Daria:''' Um... I don't have any.
->'''Speaker:''' Oh come Daria! You must have some goal.
->'''Daria:''' My goal is not to wake up at 40 with the bitter realization that I've wasted my life on a job I hate, because I was forced to decide on a career in my teens.
->'''Daria:''' Um... I don't have any.
->'''Speaker:''' Oh come Daria! You must have some goal.
->'''Daria:''' My goal is not to wake up at 40 with the bitter realization that I've wasted my life on a job I hate, because I was forced to decide on a career in my teens.
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->'''Quinn:''' Ew! Sugar Tarts?! Haven't you ever heard the expression "you eat what you are"?!
->'''Daria:''' Haven't you ever heard the expression "get the hell away from me"?
->'''Daria:''' Haven't you ever heard the expression "get the hell away from me"?
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->'''Daria:''' If you play that John Lennon song backwards it says "Imagine all the people... browsing in a mall". Isn't that weird?
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->'''Jane:''' I saw the best minds of my generation destroyed by madness. Wait a minute, my generation has no best minds.
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->'''Brittany''':Um... yes?
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->'''Jane''': So how's the story coming? Or does it disturb you if I talk while you're writing?
->'''Daria''': It would disturb me if I were actually ''doing'' any writing.
->'''Jane''': What's the problem? Take people you know and have them do whatever you want. I'd make 'em crawl, I tell you. CRAWL!
->'''Daria''': Easy there, tiger.
->'''Daria''': It would disturb me if I were actually ''doing'' any writing.
->'''Jane''': What's the problem? Take people you know and have them do whatever you want. I'd make 'em crawl, I tell you. CRAWL!
->'''Daria''': Easy there, tiger.
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Eee-nope.
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-->-- '''Daria Morgendorffer''', final lines.
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-->-- '''Daria Morgendorffer''', final lines.
Morgendorffer'''
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->'''Helen:''' Meeting!
->'''Quinn:''' Date!
->'''Jake:''' Golf!
->'''Daria:''' Sarcasm.
->'''Quinn:''' Date!
->'''Jake:''' Golf!
->'''Daria:''' Sarcasm.
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-->'''Brittany''': I can't stand this. What was I thinking?
-->'''Daria''': Brittany?
-->'''Brittany''': All right, so Kevin is a stupid, selfish, conceited jerk. He's still better than Terry or Jerry or whatever his name is and this stupid club.
-->'''Daria''': Who's Terry or Jerry?
-->'''Brittany''': Oh, no! I've said too much! Eww. What happened to your neck?
-->'''Daria''': Huh?
-->'''Brittany''': Your neck. It's all, like, blotchy.
-->'''Daria''': Ugh. I don't know.
-->'''Brittany''': I'm not surprised you could catch something in a horrible place like this.
-->'''Daria''' - Uh, Brittany, could you do me a favor?
-->'''Brittany''':Um... yes?
-->'''Daria''': Find Jane and tell her I had to leave?
-->'''Brittany''': Sure, but... will you promise not to tell Kevin about Terry or Jerry or whoever?
-->'''Daria''': In the unlikely event that, through some bizarre set of circumstances, I actually end up conversing with Kevin, I won't tell him about Terry or Jerry.
-->'''Brittany''': Thanks!
-->'''Daria''': Brittany?
-->'''Brittany''': All right, so Kevin is a stupid, selfish, conceited jerk. He's still better than Terry or Jerry or whatever his name is and this stupid club.
-->'''Daria''': Who's Terry or Jerry?
-->'''Brittany''': Oh, no! I've said too much! Eww. What happened to your neck?
-->'''Daria''': Huh?
-->'''Brittany''': Your neck. It's all, like, blotchy.
-->'''Daria''': Ugh. I don't know.
-->'''Brittany''': I'm not surprised you could catch something in a horrible place like this.
-->'''Daria''' - Uh, Brittany, could you do me a favor?
-->'''Brittany''':Um... yes?
-->'''Daria''': Find Jane and tell her I had to leave?
-->'''Brittany''': Sure, but... will you promise not to tell Kevin about Terry or Jerry or whoever?
-->'''Daria''': In the unlikely event that, through some bizarre set of circumstances, I actually end up conversing with Kevin, I won't tell him about Terry or Jerry.
-->'''Brittany''': Thanks!
to:
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->'''Daria''': Don't worry. I don't have low self-esteem. It's a mistake.
->'''Jake''': I'll say!
->'''Daria''': I have low esteem for everyone else.
->'''Jake''': I'll say!
->'''Daria''': I have low esteem for everyone else.
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--->-- ''Season 2, Episode 9:Ill''
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-->'''Brittany''': I can't stand this. What was I thinking?
-->'''Daria''': Brittany?
-->'''Brittany''': All right, so Kevin is a stupid, selfish, conceited jerk. He's still better than Terry or Jerry or whatever his name is and this stupid club.
-->'''Daria''': Who's Terry or Jerry?
-->'''Brittany''': Oh, no! I've said too much! Eww. What happened to your neck?
-->'''Daria''': Huh?
-->'''Brittany''': Your neck. It's all, like, blotchy.
-->'''Daria''': Ugh. I don't know.
-->'''Brittany''': I'm not surprised you could catch something in a horrible place like this.
-->'''Daria''' - Uh, Brittany, could you do me a favor?
-->'''Brittany''':Um... yes?
-->'''Daria''': Find Jane and tell her I had to leave?
-->'''Brittany''': Sure, but... will you promise not to tell Kevin about Terry or Jerry or whoever?
-->'''Daria''': In the unlikely event that, through some bizarre set of circumstances, I actually end up conversing with Kevin, I won't tell him about Terry or Jerry.
-->'''Brittany''': Thanks!
--->-- ''Season 2, Episode 9:Ill''
-->'''Daria''': Brittany?
-->'''Brittany''': All right, so Kevin is a stupid, selfish, conceited jerk. He's still better than Terry or Jerry or whatever his name is and this stupid club.
-->'''Daria''': Who's Terry or Jerry?
-->'''Brittany''': Oh, no! I've said too much! Eww. What happened to your neck?
-->'''Daria''': Huh?
-->'''Brittany''': Your neck. It's all, like, blotchy.
-->'''Daria''': Ugh. I don't know.
-->'''Brittany''': I'm not surprised you could catch something in a horrible place like this.
-->'''Daria''' - Uh, Brittany, could you do me a favor?
-->'''Brittany''':Um... yes?
-->'''Daria''': Find Jane and tell her I had to leave?
-->'''Brittany''': Sure, but... will you promise not to tell Kevin about Terry or Jerry or whoever?
-->'''Daria''': In the unlikely event that, through some bizarre set of circumstances, I actually end up conversing with Kevin, I won't tell him about Terry or Jerry.
-->'''Brittany''': Thanks!
--->-- ''Season 2, Episode 9:Ill''
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-->-- '''Daria Morgendorffer'''
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-->-- '''Daria Morgendorffer'''Morgendorffer''', final lines.
->'''Jane''': Daria? Come on, the neighbors are starting to talk.
->'''Daria''': Um... good. Soon they'll progress to cave drawings and civilization will be on its way.
->'''Jane''': Daria? Come on, the neighbors are starting to talk.
->'''Daria''': Um... good. Soon they'll progress to cave drawings and civilization will be on its way.