History Main / VolleyingInsults

* ''WesternAnimation/TheLittleMermaidIIIArielsBeginning'': Sebastian and Marina del Ray get this exchange:

'''Daphne:''' INBRED!\\

* ''WesternAnimation/TheLittleMermaidArielsBeginning'': Sebastian and Marina del Ray get this exchange:

* In ''[[https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12555047/4/Sanity-is-Quite-Simply-Overrated Sanity is Quite Simply Overrated]]'' a physically-eight Harriet Potter and elderly Arcturus Black [[VitriolicBestBuds do this habitually]].

* In the ''Literature/{{Discworld}}'', [[TykeBomb Famke Smith-Rhodes-Stibbons]] and [[MotherRussiaMakesYouStrong Alexandra Mumorovka]] have this sort of relationship. Both are Alphas in their respective peer groups. Famke is a student Assassin; Lexi is a student Witch. Both have been noted by their tutors as having extrordinary potential. Both are alpha thirteen year old girls. Even when fighting on the same side and watching each other's back, they trade insults and put-downs as befits VitriolicBestBuds. They profess to abominate each other, trade insults at every opportunity, and [[FriendshipDenial indignantly deny any suggestion that theirs is any sort of stealth friendship]]. Read more in the works of Creator/AAPessimal.

* In the [[AC: ''Literature/{{Discworld}}'']], [[TykeBomb Famke Smith-Rhodes-Stibbons]] and [[MotherRussiaMakesYouStrong Alexandra Mumorovka]] have this sort of relationship. Both are Alphas in their respective peer groups. Famke is a student Assassin; Lexi is a student Witch. Both have been noted by their tutors as having extrordinary potential. Both are alpha thirteen year old girls. Even when fighting on the same side and watching each other's back, they trade insults and put-downs as befits VitriolicBestBuds. They profess to abominate each other, trade insults at every opportunity, and [[FriendshipDenial indignantly deny any suggestion that theirs is any sort of stealth friendship]]. Read more in the works of Creator/AAPessimal.

-->'''Dana Appleton:''' Your Honor, I object!\\

-->'''Swoosie Kurtz:''' Your Honor, I object!\\

* The entire concept of Rob Newman and David Baddiel's ''History Today'' sketches on ''Radio/TheMaryWhitehouseExperience'', featuring two history professors insulting each other like schoolchildren; "That's you, that is..."
* In ''Series/TheMonkees'' episode "Monkees Chow Mein", Davy and Mike are dressed as superheroes and use insults as their "weapon":

* From ''Series/MyWifeAndKids'', Michael and Wanda:

* Likewise, there's an entire pirate insult mini-game in ''VideoGame/Sly3HonorAmongThieves'' where the object is to not do the same insult twice.
* Pirates and Volleying Insults seem to go well together: a quest in ''VideoGame/KingdomOfLoathing'' requires you to face another pirate in a game of Insult Beer Pong. That's a blatant swipe/parody of ''VideoGame/MonkeyIsland'', though, even to the point of having the same (long, tedious) puzzle solution and even some of the same insults.

* The cutscenes of ''The Amazing Spider-Man'' for the UsefulNotes/GameBoy have Spidey trading insults with villains.
* Imoen and Korgan in ''VideoGame/BaldursGateIIThroneOfBhaal''.
-->'''Korgan:''' Hmph, Imoen, yer an o'er-lame excuse fer a member o' this party and I be tired of exertin' meself to [[SquishyWizard protect ye]]! Next time I let ye perish, screaming like a ninny as ye does!\\
'''Imoen:''' The last time I saw you exert yourself over anything was the last slab of pork in an inn. If you could keep up with me with that beer gut of yours I'd be amazed.\\
'''Korgan:''' Beer gut?! Why, ye stinkin' wench, how dare ye! Keep up with my keen axe as it flies towards yer head, more like! Though it'd be like splittin' a hair, skinny as ye are!\\
'''Imoen:''' I'd be startled if a drunk dwarven oaf like yourself could hit the broad side of a barn with your axe. And while we're talking about stench, let's talk about the last time you passed out in your own vomit.\\
'''Korgan:''' An outrage! Yer a canker on me backside and the world would be best rid of ye! Loathsome mongrel she-dog!\\
'''Imoen:''' Brutish pig! You're nothing but a boil needing lancing!\\
'''Korgan:''' I've seen harlots with less open sores than ye, ye pimple-faced, whining gutter-snipe!\\
'''Imoen:''' You cantankerous, foul-mouthed excuse for a gully dwarf!\\
'''Korgan:''' Gully dwarf? Har har! Ye knows how to hit low, ye does! Har har! Yer a fine, fine lass, ye are, Imoen. That Gorion of yers would be proud.\\
'''Imoen:''' Aw, gee. Thanks, Korgan!
* In ''VideoGame/PlanescapeTorment'', one of the girls you can meet working in the Brothel Of Slaking Intellectual Lusts is a "mistress of insults" that you can try trading insults with. If you've got high enough Intelligence, Wisdom, and Charisma, you can beat her at her own game, earning you some respect for your skill. Otherwise, you're forced to use a LameComeback and earn her scorn.
* ''VideoGame/OhSirTheInsultSimulator'' and its sequel ''Oh...Sir!! The Hollywood Roast'' are basically this trope in game form. Two opponents pick from a pool of phrases in order to string together a semi-coherent insult ([[MadLibsDialogue "[Your mother] [was] [a grunting sow] [and] [dances like] [a hamster]!"]]). Each character has a set of topics that [[AttackItsWeakPoint do extra damage if used in an insult against them]], like [[FakeRussian Grisha]] being sensitive to insults involving his nationality and origin ("[Your beloved auntie] [secretly adores] '''[the Communists]''' [and] '''[was born in]''' [an ordinary pigsty], [and I have proof]!") and [[Franchise/JamesBond Jane Blunt]] being sensitive to insults about England and the British monarchy ("[Your sister] '''[ruins the British accent]''' [and] [your face] [kinda resembles] '''[Princess Diana's ghost]'''!")
* In ''VideoGame/{{Skyrim}}'' with the Hearthfire DLC installed, if you adopt two children you can sometimes return home to find that they're engaging in a name-calling contest.
* ''VideoGame/EnsembleStars'': Expect this to happen any time [[ImpoverishedPatrician Tsukasa]] and [[NouveauRiche Tori]] share a scene together, with Tori claiming that Tsukasa is irrelevant and stuck in the past, and Tsukasa saying that Tori is just a young upstart lacking the 'proper' noble social graces.
* ''VideoGame/OldSchoolMusical'': The Beach City Clash Competition is a contest based around this, with the competitors throwing insults at each other and trying to make the other person cry. Protagonists Tib and Rob get dropped right into a match and join for a short while before driving off.
* Pit two Pkunk Furies against each other in ''VideoGame/StarControl 2'''s [=SuperMelee=] and this results. They replenish battery by insulting the opponent, after all.

* ''Webcomic/OzyAndMillie'' had a friendly version of this in one strip, in one of their games: iambic pentameter slam.
* ''Webcomic/TheDreamer'' has Alexander and Beatrice do this [[BelligerentSexualTension in spades]].

* ''Webcomic/GirlGenius'': Gil and Tarvek, quite often during their brawls and in the Cinderella side story. Best seen when they are playing out Agatha's [[http://www.girlgeniusonline.com/comic.php?date=20091130 plan to stall for time:]]
-->'''Tarvek:''' Snitch.\\
'''Gil:''' Sneak.\\
'''Tarvek:''' Libertine!\\
'''Gil:''' Fop!
* In ''Webcomic/{{Pacificators}}'', [[FieryRedhead Cinna]] and [[MinionWithAnFInEvil Aphrodite]] got into a fight, started over whether Aphrodite's boobs are real or not. They got into the same fight ''again...'' and the second time, it was in ''Italian.''
* In ''Webcomic/DominicDeegan'', a necromancer and a clairvoyant make a merry drinking game out of trading insulting nicknames for the other's branch of magic. You repeat yourself, you drink.
* ''Webcomic/{{Nebula}}'': Uranus and Neptune's argument about whether or not [[PlutoIsExpendable Pluto is a planet]] quickly devolves into insults, though before it goes too far Sun cuts it off and brings everyone's attention back to the matter at hand.

-->'''Ebenezer:''' I already told you I gave [your lawn lopper] back, ya wingding!
-->'''Hugh:''' And I'm telling you, ya didn't, tool hog!
-->'''Ebenezer:''' Cheese brain!
-->'''Hugh:''' Sneeze jockey!
-->'''Ebenezer:''' Noodle head!

-->'''Martha:''' You're just a dupe for that hateful husband of yours!
-->'''Judy:''' "Hateful"?! You take that back!
-->'''Martha:''' Never, allergy-giver!
-->'''Judy:''' Venom-spitter!
-->'''Martha:''' She-witch!
-->'''Judy:''' Hag woman!
-->'''Martha:''' ''([[ITakeOffenseToThatLastOne gasps]])''

-->'''Hugh:''' Stupidhead!
-->'''Ebenezer:''' Moron face!
-->'''Hugh:''' Mucus monkey!
-->'''Ebenezer:''' Duck lover!
-->'''Hugh:''' [[ITakeOffenseToThatLastOne "Duck lover"?!]]
* ''WesternAnimation/AmericanDad''

* An ''WesternAnimation/{{Animaniacs}}'' sketch features Yakko trading insults with "[[NoCelebritiesWereHarmed Howie Tern]]", ultimately winning out when the best insult Tern can think of is: "You're a little shorty-shorty." Tern then explodes.
* In ''WesternAnimation/AvatarTheLastAirbender'', Katara and Sokka pick a fight in front of some Fire Nation soldiers [[BadBadActing to try and get Katara arrested...]]

* WesternAnimation/BeavisAndButtHead do this to each other constantly. On more than one occasion, it's actually shown as a sign of endearment.

* From the ''WesternAnimation/MikeLuAndOg'' episode "Tea for Three".

* In the ''WesternAnimation/TimeSquad'' episode "Ladies and Gentlemen, Meet Monty Zuma", Tuddrussel and RobotBuddy Larry 3000 start doing this when Tuddrussel gets tired of trying to remain polite and civilized while dealing with Larry mocking him. This ends up working out, as they distract the audience at a comedy contest with their barbs, discouraging Montezuma from becoming a stand-up comic instead of king of the Aztecs.

* This happens between Madame Medusa and Mr. Snoops in ''WesternAnimation/TheRescuers'' when the Devil's Eye is found.
-->'''Medusa:''' It's mine! It's all mine!\\
'''Snoops:''' Double-crosser!\\
'''Medusa:''' Cheap pickpocket!\\
'''Snoops:''' Chiseler!\\
'''Medusa:''' Ugh! Cheap crook!
* ''WesternAnimation/TheSecretOfNIMH'' has Martin (Mrs. Brisby's son) doing this with [[MeaningfulName Auntie "Shrew"]].
* Sebastian and Marina del Ray get this exchange in ''WesternAnimation/TheLittleMermaidArielsBeginning'':
-->'''Marina:''' Soft-shell.\\
'''Sebastian:''' Tardy girl.\\
'''Marina:''' Stick-eye!\\
'''Sebastian:''' Fish lips.\\
'''Marina:''' Backstabber!\\
'''Sebastian:''' Fashion disaster!\\
'''Marina:''' ''Bottom feeder!''\\
'''Sebastian:''' ''Babysitter!''
* Happens between Diego and Shira in ''WesternAnimation/IceAgeContinentalDrift'', when they are floating on a tiny ice floe in the middle of the ocean together with Manny, Sid and Granny.

* In [[WhatCouldHaveBeen an earlier version]] of ''WesternAnimation/TurningRed'', Mei was going to run for class president against Tyler and the debate would have devolved into this.

* ''Film/LiarLiar''
** The following exchange occurs in court:
-->'''Dana Appleton:''' Your Honor, I object!\\
'''Fletcher Reede:''' You would!\\
'''Appleton:''' BASTARD!\\
'''Reede:''' HAG!
** During the credits, the [[HilariousOuttakes hilarious out-take]] for the same scene:
-->'''Swoosie Kurtz:''' Your Honor, I object!\\
'''Creator/JimCarrey:''' You would!\\
'''Kurtz:''' [[LargeHam OVER-ACTOR!]]\\
'''Carrey:''' JEZEBEL! (''bursts out laughing'') Oh, no! They're on to me!
* The legendary exchange between Rufio and Peter in ''Film/{{Hook}}'', consisting of at least nineteen volleys, climaxing with:
-->'''Peter Banning:''' Rufio, if I'm a maggot burger why don't you just EAT ME? You two-toned zebra-headed slime-coated pimple-farmin' paramecium-brain, munchin' on your own mucus, suffering from Peter Pan envy!\\
'''Don't Ask:''' What's a Paramecium-brain?\\
'''Peter Banning:''' I'll tell you what a paramecium is. ''That's''' a paramecium! It's a one-celled critter with no brain that ''can't fly''! Don't mess with me, man, ''I'M A LAWYER!''
* In ''Film/WildWildWest'', West and Loveless take not-so-subtle verbal pot shots at each other for being black and [[HalfTheManHeUsedToBe crippled]], respectively. While West manages to hide any reaction he has, Loveless visibly gets angrier at every insult. This becomes a BrickJoke near the end of the film.
-->'''Loveless:''' ''[balancing on the edge of [[spoiler:a cliff]]]'' Well, I'll be a '''monkey's uncle'''! How did we arrive in this '''dark''' situation?\\
'''West:''' ''[hanging from [[spoiler:the back of Loveless' chair]]]'' I don't know, Dr. Loveless, I'm just as '''stumped''' as you are.
* Happens in ''Film/TheFortyYearOldVirgin'' when David and Cal are playing a video game:

* ''Film/TeenageMutantNinjaTurtles1990'' has a G-rated version of this between Donatello and Casey Jones as they engage in ShipToShipCombat over the characters of ''Series/GilligansIsland'', while they are fixing a truck. Part of it was that they were trying to go in alphabetical order.
-->'''Casey:''' Not even close, '''Zip-neck''', the Professor and Mary-Ann, happily ever after!\\
'''Donatello:''' No way, '''Atomic-mouth''', Gilligan was her main main, they'd be married and have six kids by now!\\
'''Casey:''' Nah, Gilligan was a geek, '''Barfaroni'''!\\
'''Donatello:''' You're the geek, '''Camel-breath'''!\\
'''Casey:''' '''Dome-head'''!\\
'''Donatello:''' (gasps and [[IResembleThatRemark defensively feels the top of his cranium]]) '''Elf-lips'''!\\
'''Casey:''' Let's give this a try, see if it works, '''Fungoid'''!\\
'''Donatello:''' Here it goes! Uh, what are we on?\\
'''Casey:''' G.\\
'''Donatello:''' Here it goes, '''Gack-face'''!\\
'''Casey:''' I'm ready, '''Hose-brain'''!
* ''Film/AnchormanTheLegendOfRonBurgundy'', when Ron and Veronica's rivalry finally spills over:

* This exchange from ''Film/TheSandlot'':
-->'''Phillips:''' We play on a real diamond, Porter. You ain't good enough to lick the dirt off our cleats.\\
'''Ham:''' Watch it, jerk!\\
'''Phillips:''' Shut up, idiot!\\
'''Ham:''' Moron!\\
'''Phillips:''' Scab eater!\\
'''Ham:''' Butt sniffer!\\
'''Phillips:''' Pus licker!\\
'''Ham:''' Fart smeller!\\
'''Phillips:''' You eat dog crap for breakfast, geek!\\
'''Ham:''' You make your weenies with [[YourMom your momma's]] toe jams!\\
'''Phillips:''' You bob for apples in the toilet and you '''like''' it!\\
'''Ham:''' You play ball like a '''''GIRL'''''!
* Happens between Xander and Yelena in ''Film/XXx''.
-->'''Yelena:''' Do you know what a wire trasfer is?\\
'''Xander:''' Is she for real? Sweetheart, is there anything else you need to do? Let us big boys have a conversation?\\
'''Yelena:''' "Conversation", a word with four syllables. Do you want some ice before your brain overheats?\\
'''Xander:''' Ice? Yes, you could chisel some off your heart -- if you can find it.
* ''Film/ScaryMovie2'': Hanson the caretaker (who has a deformed hand) and Dwight (who is a paraplegic) despise each other as soon as they meet, proceeding to throw a string of ableist insults at each other.

* ''Radio/OurMissBrooks'': Miss Brooks and Miss Enright will unavoidably start throwing catty remarks at one another, should they engage in anything but the briefest of conversations.
* An episode of ''Series/AllyMcBeal'' has Ally and her ex doing this two different times, with Ally ultimately winning both rounds. In the first, her conquering insult was "Lawyer!" (ironic, since she was one also), and in the second, she won by calling her opponent, simply, "Man!"
* In the ''Series/BabylonFive'' episode "[[Recap/BabylonFiveS03E02Convictions Convictions]]", Londo and G'Kar are trapped in an elevator. They exchange a final volley of insults as a rescue crew approaches (much to G'Kar's annoyance, as he'd seen the incident as a chance to watch Londo die under circumstances that would not trigger reprisals against his people).

* On ''Series/{{Cheers}}'', Sam did this with both Diane and Rebecca. In both cases, it frequently went into SlapSlapKiss territory.
* Clarissa and Ferguson on ''Series/ClarissaExplainsItAll'' could insult each other back and forth for a very long time, including one particularly long exchange at the end of the episode "The Silent Treatment".
* The pilot episode of ''Series/{{Community}}'' has this exchange:

* Inverted in the ''Series/ItsAlwaysSunnyInPhiladelphia'' episode, "The Gang Broke Dee". The gang try to insult Dee. But instead of insulting them back, she preemptively insults herself by trying to guess their insults and interrupting them continuously until they stop. They try to explain to her it's less fun that way and she should stop doing that.
* From ''Series/{{Lost}}'', "Tricia Tanaka is Dead":

* Politically incorrect BritCom ''Series/LoveThyNeighbour'' relied on the back-and-forth exchange of racially heated epithets between a racist redneck and his black nextdoor-neighbour - even after they became VitriolicBestbuds in all but name.

* In ''Series/{{Moonlighting}}'', anytime Maddie and David argue,[[note]]Which is to say, literally almost all the time.[[/note]] it has the potential to go into this.

* ''Series/{{Supernatural}}''. The PreviouslyOn montage for "Tall Tales" is edited this way to show Sam and Dean pranking and snapping at each other in various episodes.

* Surprisingly, given its {{Cluster F Bomb}}s and extremely FloweryInsults, ''Series/TheThickOfIt'' doesn't have as many as you'd think. Arguments frequently occur, but they're usually about [[XanatosSpeedChess something that needs to be dealt with quickly]] and so seldom become simple insult contests. Also, the fact that most of the arguments involve [[MagnificentBastard Malcolm]] [[SirSwearsALot Tucker]], who can steamroller most opposition fairly easily, means that the shouting matches don't drag on for as long as a fight between equals would.
* In the ''Series/TwoAndAHalfMen'' episode "For the Sake of the Child", Charlie and Alan take turns at insulting each other, using up insults that start with each letter of the alphabet. When we see them, they're at L.

* In ''Literature/FullMetalPanic'', Kurz and Sousuke tend to do this with each other a lot. Kurz tends to take the dirtier approach, and insults Sousuke by calling him a stupid, naive, [[VirginityMakesYouStupid gutless virgin]] (which Sousuke reacts angrily to mainly because he [[ChasteHero assumes it's probably an insult]]), while Sousuke tends to attack Kurz as being a lazy, useless good-for-nothing. Interestingly enough, Kurz is shown to pretty much be the ''only'' person who can make [[TheStoic Sousuke]] get annoyed to the point where he yells petty insults and bickers. Some people think it [[HoYay means]] [[LikeAnOldMarriedCouple something]].

* In ''Webcomic/{{Pacificators}}'', [[FieryRedhead Cinna]] and [[MinionWithAnFInEvil Aphrodite]] got into a fight, started over whether Aphrodite's [[GagBoobs boobs are real or not]]. They got into the same fight ''again...'' and the second time, it was in ''Italian.''

* '' LightNovel/ChivalryOfAFailedKnight'' has Stella Vermillion and Shizuku Kurogane trading barbs about each other's bust size while they are cleaning the girl's bathrooms as punishment.

* In ''LightNovel/FullMetalPanic'', Kurz and Sousuke tend to do this with each other a lot. Kurz tends to take the dirtier approach, and insults Sousuke by calling him a stupid, naive, [[VirginityMakesYouStupid gutless virgin]] (which Sousuke reacts angrily to mainly because he [[ChasteHero assumes it's probably an insult]]), while Sousuke tends to attack Kurz as being a lazy, useless good-for-nothing. Interestingly enough, Kurz is shown to pretty much be the ''only'' person who can make [[TheStoic Sousuke]] get annoyed to the point where he yells petty insults and bickers. Some people think it [[HoYay means]] [[LikeAnOldMarriedCouple something]].

* In ''LightNovel/{{Toradora}}'', Taiga and Sumire's fight devolves into this. It's Taiga's last-ditch effort to provoke an AnguishedDeclarationOfLove from Sumire.

* In the ''Series/BabylonFive'' episode "Convictions", Londo and G'Kar are trapped in an elevator. They exchange a final volley of insults as a rescue crew approaches (much to G'Kar's annoyance, as he'd seen the incident as a chance to watch Londo die under circumstances that would not trigger reprisals against his people).

** Don't forget Iceburg and Franky with "Bakanky" and "Bakaburg."

* Creator/HenrikWergeland and rival poet Johan Sebastian Welhaven ended in this while students. The Student`s society had a news wall where clips and scraps were pinned up for public reading. One of the two wrote a humorous verse pointed at the other, and the fight started from there. This quarrel is the more famous because the whole round of insults were in metre and rhyme, and lasted for almost a year. And ''then'' somebody witty decided to ''print'' the verses in a newspaper... The "scrap feud" became cultural history in a matter of days, as ''everybody else'' entered the debate.

* Known as "The Dozens" in African-American culture, this is a semi-friendly practice of trying to top each others' insults. This is thought to have originated from the slave-trade practice of selling less valuable (old, feeble, deformed) or less skilled slaves by "the dozens", where being included in that group was the lowest insult imaginable.

'''Jim West:''' Well, I can see where it'd be difficult for a man of your stature to keep in touch with even ''half'' the people you know.\\

'''Julia:''' {{Hero complex}}.\\

* ''Manga/{{Haikyuu}}'': Teammates and rivals [[VitriolicBestBuds Hinata and Kageyama]] bicker a lot, but the most ridiculous argument they've had was during a tense moment in season 2 episode 22[[note]] a flashback scene of something that happened in an earlier episode where the joke wasn't included [[/note]] where they argue about whether to say "poop" or "shit" after Yamaguchi told the team (in a very serious voice) that he was going to the bathroom.

* ''Manga/{{Haikyuu}}'': Teammates and rivals [[VitriolicBestBuds Hinata and Kageyama]] bicker a lot, but the most ridiculous argument they've had was during a tense moment in season 2 episode 22 where they argue about whether to say "poop" or "shit" after Yamaguchi told the team (in a very serious voice) that he was going to the bathroom.