History Main / TheGuardsMustbeCrazy

* Ignoring inanimate objects that could conceal an intruder which [[MobileShrubbery move around when they aren't looking]].

* ''[[Film/GodzillaKingOfTheMonsters2019 Godzilla: King of the Monsters]]'' (2019): All of the [[Characters/MonsterVerseHumans eco-terrorists]] guarding the ORCA device on which the plot hinges choose to all take a break at the same time and leave it unguarded, which enables Madison Russell to steal the device and use it to help the heroes stop the monsters' global rampage.

* In ''Series/StarTrekTheOriginalSeries'' fanfic [[https://archiveofourown.org/works/27657847/chapters/67678225 The Tresine Troubles]], a captured Kirk is able to lure the guard into his prison cell merely by singing (i.e, caterwauling) loudly enough that the guy can't help but go in and shut him up. Of course, the idiot is swiftly disarmed and the other guard stunned with the 'borrowed' weapon. Justified in that the guards in question belong to a rather disorganized terrorist group and have no real training or discipine.
* Parodied in ''WebVideo/YuGiOhTheAbridgedSeries'' when Tristan is sneaking up on a guard in a suit of armor. "CLUNK CLUNK CLUNK." "Must be the wind." "CLUNK CLUNK CLUNK." "Yeah, that's definitely the sound that wind makes."
* In ''Fanfic/ThatEpicPlan'', L sends Aizawa along to supervise the prisoner transfer of Beyond Birthday to taskforce HQ, but with the ease Light has with communicating with Beyond, Aizawa might as well not be there at all.
* The ''WesternAnimation/MyLittlePonyFriendshipIsMagic'' fanfiction ''Fanfic/JerichoMLP'' has some amusing amounts of this.
** Lampshaded when a guard just lets the main character, [[FirstPersonSmartass Jericho]] (a foreigner), walk into a guarded compound when all Jericho offers in the flimsy excuse that he's a "[[PaperThinDisguise plumber]]". (Jericho is dressed like a cowboy, by the way.)
--->''You are a very trusting stallion and should be fired from your job. You didn't even check to see if I had any identification... if Equestria even uses identification like that. Huh. I should look into that.''
** And then b-e-a-utifully subverted! Jericho walks up to the Baron's plantation house, tricks the guard into letting him in, then, as Jericho is walking past, the guard bashes Jericho upside the head with his nightstick.

* In the 12 chapter of the ''WesternAnimation/MyLittlePonyFriendshipIsMagic'' fic ''Fanfic/LovedAndLost'', one of the guards under [[TheUsurper King Jewelius]] is patrolling to make sure the [[VoluntaryShapeshifting Changelings]] are locked up in their cells. Queen Chrysalis tries to fool him by turning herself into Jewelius, and then into a crying filly. To make her stop, the irritated guard walks close to her cell, and Chrysalis seizes her chance to slam his head against the bars and steal the keys he's carrying as he falls unconscious. [[spoiler:After his takeover, Jewelius [[ThePurge murdered all the Royal Guards]] who were injured during the Changeling invasion yet [[UndyingLoyalty remained loyal]] to the usurper princesses, [[TradingBarsForStripes filling the greatly decreased ranks with convicts he bribed to be loyal to himself]]. If this guard is one of those replacements, his carelessness would be explained by his lack of proper drilling in a guard's duties.]]
** In the tenth chapter, when Applejack and Rarity disguise themselves as maids while sneaking in the castle (with Cadance hiding in the housekeeping cart they're pushing), they nervously claim to the first guard who stops them that they're doing some late night cleaning. He eyes them suspiciously for a moment before letting them carry on.
* In episode 8 of ''WebVideo/CodeMENT'', Lelouch/One spends about a minute and half firing roughly 70 bullets from a pistol [[BottomlessMagazines without reloading]]. The two guards outside the room casually converse over and throughout the clearly audible gunfire. They then kick the door in and rush in guns blazing when they are alarmed by Lelouch's cough.
* A bit of a running gag in ''WebVideo/MiraiNikkiTheAbridgedSeries'' is to explain any instance of a character making it past the security by simply saying "Their security sucks". Said characters included an injured and dehydrated terrorist, a blind man, and [[ArsonMurderAndJaywalking Yukiteru]].
* In ''Fanfic/SpiderNinja'', Avengers Tower is surrounded by security cameras and a team of security guards, even late at night. These same security guards all abandon their posts when the leading guard gets an anonymous call that there are free doughnuts in the break room, and ''no one'' thinks to check why suddenly all of the security cameras have been deactivated (aka ''[[ThereIsNoKillLikeOverkill stabbed through the screen]]''). This allows the Turtles to get to and from Avengers Tower totally unseen.

* The hapless security guards in ''Film/{{Lifeforce|1985}}'' are this trope. The first one falls head and heels for the naked [[EvilIsSexy Space Girl]] and gets his LifeEnergy sucked for this, allowing her to escape from the autopsy room. The other three guards that are supposed to stop her FullFrontalAssault on the research facility don't fare any better, with one of them trying to lure her with a half-eaten biscuit only to get zapped for his trouble and another one suffering a similar fate. The last, older guard is scared out of his wits and does nothing as the Space Girl calmly makes an exit.

* Alcatraz's guards were fooled by one oldest trick in the book after another: dummy heads in the bed, [[LockingMacGyverInTheStoreCupboard digging a hole with spoons]], and climbing up the [[AirVentPassageway ventilator shaft]], making this trope not only GenreBlindness but TruthInTelevision. Since the Alcatraz escape was done some years ago, it might be SeinfeldIsUnfunny too.
** The two inmates who escaped from New York's Clinton Correctional Facility in 2015 made dummies and, per ''Film/TheShawshankRedemption'', eventually cut a passage to the sewers to the outside. They were able to count on the corrections officers on the night shift not really doing their actual counts, just saying that they had.

* Confiscate the equipment of a prisoner, then leaving them in an unsecured location where the prisoner can easily retrieve them during an escape attempt.

* Allowing the prisoner/captive to [[BathroomSearchExcuse go to the bathroom]] or [[BathroomBreakOut relieve him/herself unguarded]], especially when the bathroom contains possible [[AirVentPassageway alternate exits]].
* Never learning that it's NOT [[AttackAttackAttack a good idea to fight]] the hero/villain. Especially after he/she just left [[AtopAMountainOfCorpses a mountain of their corpses]] in his/her wake.

** Also {{subverted|Trope}} on one occasion, where Fersen is leaving Versailles after a secret meeting with Marie Antoinette and is stopped by some soldiers of the French Guards. Bonus points for the French Guards being particularly infamous for laziness during guard duty and Oscar, who had recently become their commander, showing up in time to save Fersen ''[[WrongGenreSavvy because she planned to catch them shirking guard duty]]''. Then DoubleSubverted when Oscar tells Fersen which gate was guarded by the laziest guards (who weren't in Oscar's regiment, so it wasn't her problem).

** Later {{Subverted}}: when the infiltrator penetrates [=EarthDome=] (the city near Geneva built specifically to house the Earth Alliance government), he successfully enters thanks to the codes he extracted from the deputy director, his invisible suit, and the fact he's believed to have drowned right after the scuffle with the telepaths, but fails to leave when [[EvilDetectingDog a dog sniffs him, fails to see him, and attacks]], wrecking his suit and causing half the guards to come to kill him (he's killed by the ones who found him about one minute before a hundred guards tracks him down). After that incident, guard dogs are dispatched to the entrance of all military bases, with one Dilgar with an identical suit failing to secretly follow one of his leaders to a diplomatic meeting specifically because of a guard dog alerting the guards.

* In ''Fanfic/SpiderNinja'', Avengers Tower is surrounded by security cameras and a team of security guards, even late at night. These same security guards all abandon their posts when the leading guard gets an anonymous call that there are free doughnuts in the break room, and ''no one'' thinks to check why suddenly all of the security cameras have been deactivated (aka ''[[NoKillLikeOverkill stabbed through the screen]]''). This allows the Turtles to get to and from Avengers Tower totally unseen.

* In ''Webcomic/{{Adventurers}}'', there may be [[RunningGag many guards in the castle]], but [[http://www.adventurers-comic.com/d/0288.html they don't seem that good at keeping their secret passwords actually secret]]. A [[http://www.adventurers-comic.com/d/0350.html later strip]] subverts this somewhat.

* In ''Fanfic/{{Spider-Ninja}}'', Avengers Tower is surrounded by security cameras and a team of security guards, even late at night. These same security guards all abandon their posts when the leading guard gets an anonymous call that there are free doughnuts in the break room, and ''no one'' thinks to check why suddenly all of the security cameras have been deactivated (aka ''[[NoKillLikeOverkill stabbed through the screen]]''). This allows the Turtles to get to and from Avengers Tower totally unseen.

* Subverted (sort of) in ''Film/AntMan1''. A heist involves Luis impersonating a security guard. When another guard asks him what he's doing, he claims that the "boss man" told him to check the room. The guard he's trying to con? The boss man. No word whether it would have worked on any other guard, though.
** Hilariously averted when Lang attempts to break into an old Stark warehouse [[spoiler:(now the Avengers headquarters)]]. He doesn't see anyone around and thinks he's scot-free, only for the intrusion to be investigated and spotted ''immediately''.

* ''Film/TheGoodTheBadAndTheUgly'' (1966). Wallace lets Tuco go relieve himself. BIG mistake.

* In ''Film/JurassicWorld'' the ''I. rex's'' escape is, in spite of it being smart enough to fake an escape by making it look as though it climbed over the wall and hiding, and having enough control over its bodily functions to fool a thermal scanner, still reliant on people being dumb enough to enter its enclosure ''before'' checking if its implanted tracker is still in there, even though this information is a phone call away.
* The hapless security guards in ''Film/Lifeforce1985'' are this trope. The first one falls head and heels for the naked [[EvilIsSexy Space Girl]] and gets his LifeEnergy sucked for this, allowing her to escape from the autopsy room. The other three guards that are supposed to stop her FullFrontalAssault on the research facility don't fare any better, with one of them trying to lure her with a half-eaten biscuit only to get zapped for his trouble and another one suffering a similar fate. The last, older guard is scared out of his wits and does nothing as the Space Girl calmly makes an exit.

* The guards of Swamp Castle in ''Film/MontyPythonAndTheHolyGrail'' have a hard time comprehending simple orders. Even if they did, they wouldn't have stood a chance against Lancelot's UnstoppableRage. The guards were expecting guests for the wedding, but even still, calmly watching a screaming knight charging towards you over a field with a sword brandished makes you wonder…
-->"Now, you're not supposed to enter the roo-- ARRGH!"
** None of them make even a token effort to fight Lancelot while he massacres the wedding party, or even try to ''[[TooDumbToLive avoid him.]]''

* In ''Film/NightAtTheMuseum: Battle of the Smithsonian'', Larry's escapades in the various branches of the Smithsonian along the National Mall go completely unnoticed, as if the entire area is devoid of any human presence save Larry himself. Ironically, Larry is a guard. Would YOU stick around once the dinosaur skeletons and such started moving?
** In both "Night at the Museum" movies, it's more like "the museum administrators must be crazy." Larry's initiation involves being given a rule book, a uniform, a brief tour by his predecessor, and a small note of rather unusual instructions and then being left to his own devices, with no backup. If it weren't for the army of [[AnimateInanimateObject animate inanimate objects]], he would have been completely helpless when the inevitable robbery occurs. His British counterpart in the second movie has it even worse. While she ''is'' quite competent, and did go entirely by the rule book, the closest thing she has to a weapon, is a hammer she brings from home while Larry at least has a night-stick, a flashlight, and pepper spray. Like Larry, she also has no backup, except a long, complicated phone number to call, and then only when she's absolutely certain things have escalated to a point that she can't possibly handle it by herself. As graphically shown, this puts her completely at the mercy of any determined or marginally competent group of thieves, criminals, or malcontents intending to do her or the museum harm. She lampshades that she's starved for conversation because she doesn't have co-workers at the job.
* ''Film/ThePhantom1943'': At one point the Phantom is on the loose in a fortified compound, but has no way of getting past the impregnable front gate -- until the guard leading the search for the Phantom orders the gate opened so he can go and see if the Phantom has already got out.

* In ''Film/{{Star Trek VI|The Undiscovered Country}}'', the ''Enterprise'' manages to fly deep into Klingon territory to rescue Kirk and [=McCoy=] despite a listening post picking them up and demanding to know their identity and destination. They manage to fool the completely incompetent guards despite having to resort to using an English-Klingon dictionary to look up their answers and making several grammatical errors during the conversation.
** Actually explained in the novelization, which states that the operators of the listening post assumed the ''Enterprise'' crew were just harmless smugglers, not a Federation cruiser, and so let them through (the Klingon officer's parting shot "Don't catch any bugs" is an old smuggler's in-joke.)

* ''Franchise/StarWars: Episode IV -- Film/ANewHope'': this is mostly averted, despite their memetic reputation for incompetence, the Stormtrooper corps actually act pretty sensibly in most situations.

* ''Film/StreetFighter'' makes you wonder: If you were the radio guy and you heard "Security, this is '''''CLANG!!!'''''" followed by dead silence, would you send a team to investigate or would you just shrug and continue eating your [[ProductPlacement Snickers]] like [[BigBad M. Bison's]] radio guy obviously did after Bison's lab guard tried to call for help before being wanged on the head with a fire extinguisher?
* This Trope can be applied to ''all'' of El Guapo's thugs who act as guards in ''Film/ThreeAmigos''. In one scene, Lucky is chained up in the dungeon, but the guard tosses the keys to his chains on the floor to taunt him, figuring he can't reach them (it takes a few tries, but he does), while Dusty is able to rescue Carmen because the guard in charge of watching her is asleep on duty. (It's the middle of the day.) In fact, El Guapo's men seem only slightly more competent than the would-be heroes are, at most.

* The hapless security guards in ''Film/{{Lifeforce}}'' are this trope. The first one falls head and heels for the naked [[EvilIsSexy Space Girl]] and gets his LifeEnergy sucked for this, allowing her to escape from the autopsy room. The other three guards that are supposed to stop her FullFrontalAssault on the research facility don't fare any better, with one of them trying to lure her with a half-eaten biscuit only to get zapped for his trouble and another one suffering a similar fate. The last, older guard is scared out of his wits and does nothing as the Space Girl calmly makes an exit.

* In 1987, a 18-year-old West-German aviator named Mathias Rust managed to fly straight through several supposedly impregnable layers of Soviet air-defense systems and land his Cessna [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9TXIGfL2iFw near the center of Red Square]]. What made this worse was that he was spotted on several occasions by air defense crews and interceptors, but most of them either assumed he was friendly, thought he had crashed shortly afterwards, or otherwise failed to gain permission to shoot him down. The event ended up irreparably damaging the credibitly of the Soviet military and led to the firing of many senior officers.