History Main / ThaliasMusings

11th May '15 3:38:46 AM SeptimusHeap
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[[quoteright:300:http://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/thalias_musings_logo_small_724.jpg]] ''Thalia's Musings'' is an original WebSerialNovel. It’s narrated by Thalia, the Muse of Comedy, as she observes the comedy, drama, and tragedy of the ancient Greek pantheon. But when Thalia becomes more than an observer, the Fates take notice. Are Thalia’s powers limited to helping mortal playwrights hack out a comedy sketch, or can she create happy endings in real life, even for the gods? The Fates want to know. In the first volume, ''A Snag in the Tapestry'', Thalia and her eight sisters have been ordered by Zeus to leave their home on Mt. Helicon and move to Mt. Parnassus under the governorship of the god Apollo. When Thalia and Apollo raise a cursed nymph from the dead, Thalia starts to wonder if the Muses have greater powers than anyone realized. The Fates, threatened by this possibility, put her to a test. But Thalia cares less about the Fates’ games than the behind-the-scenes drama of the Olympian royal court. In the second volume, ''Snarled Threads'', Thalia is given a new test: she must use her powers to bring about a happy ending for the goddess Athena and her beloved Artemis. But the Fates have decreed that Athena, the Goddess of Wisdom, will never be compromised by Love. When a huntress accuses Artemis of impregnating her, Thalia fears this turn of events is the Fates’ judgement. Meanwhile, Thalia has her own problems as the young demigod Adonis captures the affections of both Aphrodite ''and'' Apollo. In the third volume, ''Unraveled'', it’s been two years since Thalia last heard from the Fates. She has a new mission from Athena: keep Beroe, daughter of Adonis and Aphrodite, alive. Poseidon wants to make Beroe his new queen and use her as leverage to gain a seat at Zeus’ court. Dionysus wants to marry Beroe and give her a life of hedonistic bliss in his forest. Beroe wants to battle for her own hand and join Artemis’ hunters. And Zeus wants Beroe out of the way because she holds the memories of the dead and claims she’s seen him kill Hera. All the more reason for Thalia to keep a secret she’s discovered: Hera’s in love. With the mortal King Ixion. And they may have been set up by Athena. Can Thalia save the people she cares about from becoming collateral damage in Athena’s revolution? Will the revolution succeed before everything comes unraveled? You can read it [[http://thaliasmusingsnovels.com/ here]]. Volumes 1-3 are also available as ebooks on the Kindle and NOOK. It's currently unknown whether there will be a print release or not. ---- !! ''Thalia's Musings'' provides examples of: * AccompliceByInaction: When all is said and done, most Olympians were this towards Artemis and Apollo when Zeus, Hera or their legitimate children abused them. But this does not stop Athéna, Hestia and the muses from offering solace or [[spoiler: Athéna]] to finally defy Zeus in a CrowningMomentOfAwesome. ** Thalia herself seems to mostly not care about everyday mortal problems and most of humans's personal tragedies. Probably justified because she knows all too well, from her sister and her friend's (?) misadventures, that most humans end up living in dull peace, not even remembering you or anything related to their lives. She still snaps out of it in ''really'' depressing cases, like [[spoiler: Echo]]'s, but always keeps it under wraps. * AlmostKiss: Lampshaded by Thalia as it happens to her and Apollo. -->"The Almost Kiss. Such a classic trope in romantic comedy. The concept I am about to reveal to you may be beyond your mortal comprehension, so listen carefully: ''Romantic Comedy'' is what happens when my domain and Aphrodite’s intersect. The fact that she and I have never gotten along terribly well is the reason works in this genre so often fail at being either romantic or comical." [[http://thaliasmusingsnovels.wordpress.com/2011/07/10/1-7-please-be-seated/]] * AllThereInTheManual: The bonus chapters are only available on the [[http://thaliasmusingsnovels.com/table-of-contents/ original website]], not the ebook release. * AnachronismStew: Takes place in Ancient Greece but forks and popcorn exist. Also Thalia refers to Echo’s fragile psyche five chapters prior to the character Psyche showing up and occasionally uses modern [[MemeticMutation memes]]. It’s not too distracting as the story runs on RuleOfFunny. * AnsweringEcho: [[CaptainObvious Echo]]. * {{Asexual}}: Hestia. Artemis claims to be this, but she's secretly in love with Athena. * AwesomenessByAnalysis / ReasonYouSuckSpeech: In the Cronia Carol side story, Thalia does this to [[spoiler: her apparent future self, and by extension, the Fates]], pointing out the vision’s PlotHoles. She wins. * BalefulPolymorph: Hera is very fond of visiting this fate on Zeus's paramours. Io in particular was turned into a cow and then given to Thalia as a pet. * BestialityIsDepraved: To Thalia about a lamb: --> '''Apollo''': Do not call me that creature’s ''daddy''. I’ve never copulated with livestock, which is more than I can say for others in my . . . family. * BrainBleach: It actually exists: a dilution of the water from the river Lethe will effect amnesia in the drinker. * CerebusSyndrome: The dark, trauma-centric parts of the story (ie, [[spoiler:Artemis almost being raped by Zeus; Zeus's abusive relationship with Hera]]) are written very well, with an eye towards sensitivity and GreyAndGreyMorality. Which is good, because in the second volume, there starts to be a '''lot''' of them. * ChekhovsGag: Thalia makes a smart remark about Daphne (following the tree incident) preferring Artemis to Apollo. Several chapters later, we find out that [[spoiler: Daphne had joined Artemis’ hunting group after being spirited away (the tree was left in her place).]] ** In an early chapter, Eustachys writes a play which ends with Apollo and Thalia hooking up. Later, Eros references that part of the play and makes a comment about being in one of his plays. During the Pythian Games, [[spoiler: Eustachys gets last minute inspiration and writes a comedy about Eros and Psyche clueing Thalia in to their whereabouts. One chapter later, he was an actor in the sequel, playing himself.]] * ComedicSociopathy: Thalia's method of answering her worshippers' prayers for comedic inspiration. --> "I try to help [them] by providing a series of comic mishaps in their lives. They never seem very appreciative." [[http://thaliasmusingsnovels.wordpress.com/2011/06/27/1-5-let-the-games-begin/]]. * CoolHorse: Pegasus. Athena gave him to the Muses because he was too smart for her soldiers. * CrapsaccharineWorld: How Thalia describes Mount Olympus to Hades. Also overlaps with GildedCage; the Olympians are ''gods,'' and they can have anything they want...except safety, and the freedom to make their own choices. --> “I hate Zeus’ court. [...] The whole thing’s so fake. It’s all bright and shiny and heavenly and perfect, but Zeus is just…I don’t know, sociopathic? Everyone’s scared of him. And he’s such a perv. I can’t stand being around him. I would never work with him one-on-one like this. And I would certainly never help someone I cared about run away with him. My home is in Zeus’ realm and, as long as humans need to laugh, I don’t see that changing; but sometimes I miss having a king I can respect. You know, to the extent that I respect anything.” * {{Curse}}: The one Hera had placed on poor Echo was a particularly nasty one. * DarkerAndEdgier: The second volume, so much. There's still little bits of comedy, but they're scattered in between Artemis [[spoiler:recovering from Zeus's attempt to rape her, and the attack from Hera that followed, Thalia planning revenge on Zeus for raping Calliope, Athena also planning revenge on Zeus]] and Zeus just generally being [[{{Understatement}} a dick]] to ''everyone.'' * DecoyGetaway: [[spoiler: Echo. Pan creates an ExpendableClone to help her fake her death.]] * DysfunctionalFamily: ** Zeus and Hera's family, both with their legitimate children and Zeus' bastards to whom Hera is the WickedStepmother. ** Hephaestus, Aphrodite, and Eros. ** Averted with the Muses, [[HappilyMarried Hades and Persephone]], and Asclepius and Epione's family. * EarthShatteringKaboom: --> '''Thalia''': “Because if anyone [[spoiler: took Hades away from Persephone]], she wouldn’t turn the earth into a burnt-out wasteland. There would be no earth left. There would be a big black hole in the universe where it used to be.” * EntitledBastard: [[AlternateCharacterInterpretation Aphrodite's opinion on Hephaistos]]. It seems to be flat-out hypocrisy, untill you learn about [[FourthDateMarriage her]] [[WinYourFreedom history]] and his [[InferioritySuperiorityComplex excusable]] [[AbusiveParents self-issues]]. Then, you can kind of see where this is coming from. * EveryoneCanSeeIt: Let's see, Apollo and Thalia have feelings for each other. Hephaestus sympathises with her during the Daphne debacle, Eros and Aphrodite keep offering to set them up together. Even Artemis knows that her brother becomes afflicted with a case of LoveMakesYouStupid when he is showing off for Thalia. Also everyone in Olympus speculates about them. * ExactWords: Aphrodite's GenreSavvy blessing on the Pythian Games: [[spoiler:"To whichever two among the gods and goddesses here whom the Fates will choose, may you each meet your true love at the Pythian Games."]] [[http://thaliasmusingsnovels.wordpress.com/2011/06/27/1-5-let-the-games-begin/]] Thalia, being equally genre savvy, knows that if she or Apollo are chosen, [[spoiler: they won't end up together since they've already met.]] ** The first to be chosen is [[spoiler:Aphrodite's own son Eros, who finds love at first sight with Psyche.]] ** The second is [[spoiler:Hephaestus, Aphrodite's ''husband''. She's more than happy to let him go.]] * {{Fembot}}: Thalia recalls Hephaestus constructing "solid gold, fully automated, mechanical assistants" that were built "in the form of very attractive women." He got rid of them once he had a girlfriend. * FoodFight: Thalia apparently starts these (by asking ‘which art or science is greater than another?’). * GiveGeeksAChance: Hephaestus tries to invoke this in his marriage to Aphrodite. It doesn't work. [[spoiler:After his divorce, he falls for Aglaea, a science-obsessed demigoddess who's had a crush on him for a while.]] * GoldenMoment: Apollo attempts to invoke this trope after Thalia has a narrow brush with Hera's wrath. Thalia can't take it seriously and doubts he does, either. --> '''Apollo:''' Well, that's the end of that. I hope you've learned something. --> '''Thalia:''' [[ItMakesSenseInContext I've learned I am never giving birth.]] [[http://thaliasmusingsnovels.wordpress.com/2011/06/13/1-3-my-kingdom-for-a-pet/]] * [[GoToYourRoom Go To Your Quarters]]: "And stay there until dinner." * GotVolunteered: Happens to Apollo when he tries to get Thalia out of watching eternal adolescent Eros for the day. (She owed Hephaestus a favor.) Hephaestus thinks Apollo is volunteering to help. Apollo is too nice to refuse. * ImplausibleDeniability: Thalia tries this with Apollo when he asks for an explanation of the noise from a WildTeenParty. She claims her sisters are just singing each other to sleep -- [[{{Kesha}} with a parody of ''Tik Tok'']]. * ImmuneToFate: The Fates wonder if Thalia and thus the rest of the Muses are this. They don't like the idea. * IncestIsRelative: Dyonisos and a drunk [[spoiler: Apollo]]. They french-kissed. Once. Both were most probably drunk. [[{{Squick}} We hope]]. * IncrediblyInconvenientDeity: Thalia only agrees to help the playwright Eustachis if he performs a series of actions designed to annoy Apollo and possibly even bring the wrath of the sun god on his head. * INeedAFreakingDrink: “[B]lame the pathetic contestants in the Theater division who drove [Melpomene] and Thalia to the demon rum.” / “And demon wine and demon whiskey.” * InvisibleToNormals: The gods and demigods, unless they choose to be seen and/or heard. * {{Irony}}: When Hera says that during a wedding the attention belongs solely on the bride and groom and on the goddess that made the union possible. What she does not know is that it was Thalia's blessing (At least in part) that made that particular union possible. Thalia of course lampshades this in her thoughts. * KissingUnderTheInfluence: Calliope after the beach party. Also everyone that gets hit by Eros's golden arrows. * LighterAndSofter: Some characters get happier fates than the ones in the original myths: ** In the original myth, she was turned into a laurel tree; instead [[spoiler: Daphne was spirited away, the laurel tree was left in her place, and became a huntress of Artemis.]] ** In the original myth, she was stuck repeating the words of others until she either faded away or Pan caused her death (by having her torn apart by panicking shepherds); instead [[spoiler: Echo regains her voice, spends a time as one of Artemis’ huntresses and (when Hera became suspicious) Pan helped her fake her death. They are now in a shockingly committed relationship with each other and she visits with the other huntresses when they’re off duty.]] ** In the original myth, she was turned into a cow and forced to ‘wander the earth without rest, plagued by a gadfly’; instead [[spoiler: Io regains her human form and escapes to parts unknown with her son.]] ** In the original myth, she was turned into a bear and slain by Artemis; instead [[spoiler: Callisto was healed and hidden in the constellations Ursa.]] ** In the original myth, she was given a monstrous form as punishment; instead [[spoiler: Medusa begged for the form as protection. The cause of her death is still currently unknown.]] * LikeBrotherAndSister: Apollo and Calliope, except on rare occasions when Calliope is drunk. * LoveMakesYouStupid: According to Artemis, Apollo suffers from this. Also Eros after he rescued Psyche. * LovePotion: Eros's arrows and Aphrodite's spells work in that fashion. One notable example is Amphitrite. * NearRapeExperience: [[spoiler:Artemis]] at the hands of Zeus, as Volume 2 reveals. * NoodleIncident: Many. * ParentalMarriageVeto: One of the laws of the Pantheon, even for the Twelve. Apollo tries to invoke this as Governor of the Muses, but is quickly shot down by Calliope. It's strongly implied that Artemis, as Apollo's legal guardian, can invoke this to him. * PassThePopcorn: A couple instances; usually summoned by Thalia. The first time Apollo turns it into charcoal dust, the second he shares it with her, the third he isn't there and Athena disintegrates it saying that it's not time [[LampshadeHanging for comedic props]]. * [[spoiler: RapeAsDrama: The second volume explores some of the darker sides to Greek mythology, when viewed from a modern perspective.]] ** [[spoiler: RapeAsBackstory: Or rather, AttemptedRape as Backstory, for Artemis. This does not actually make it much less traumatic, or so the character implies.]] * RelationshipSalvagingDisaster: Thalia thinks Eros' disappearance will be this to Hephaestus and Aphrodite's troubled marriage. [[spoiler:Averted when the resolution culminates in their long-overdue divorce.]] * RoyallyScrewedUp: Zeus and Hera and their children, ranging from good but troubled (Apollo and Artemis) to flat-out crazy (Eris). * SadlyMythtaken: Primarily averted; the writer apparently [[ShownTheirWork did her research]]. ** EveryoneHatesHades: Also averted, though Thalia mentions it at one point as being the general mortal consensus. A case could be made for the trope being ''inverted'': Hades is one of the few genuinely good and nice gods of the pantheon (if, according to Thalia, 'the ultimate misanthrope introverted loner'), especially when compared to the other Titans' creations (eg. Zeus, Hera...) * ShipperOnDeck: Aphrodite and Eros to Thalia and Apollo. Eros to [[{{LesYay}} Thalia]] and [[{{CrackPairing}} Athena]], Apollo and Daphne, Zeus and Hera, Zeus and Io, etc. ** Thalia to Artemis and Athena, which is half the plot of ''Snarled Threads''. ** Apparently, random Greeks ship ''Team Thalia'' (as well as ''Team Calliope'', ''Team Terpsichore'', ''Team Dionysus'', etc.) * ShowWithinAShow: The play Thalia sponsors at the Pythian Games is Type 3. It provides a safe means of [[spoiler: revealing Eros and Psyche's whereabouts, repenting to Aphrodite, and asking that Psyche be made immortal. Aphrodite and Hera take to the stage to grant both requests.]] * StalkerWithACrush: Almost every god and goddess has done this to a pretty mortal at least once. * StuffBlowingUp: Whatever happened at the last Pythian Games, apparently it included concussive pyrotechnics and made Hephaestus add more fire-proofing and structural reinforcement to the amphitheater. * TangledFamilyTree: It's the Greek Pantheon. * TechnicalVirgin: As if volume two, Artemis and Athena. * TheyDo: [[spoiler: Artemis and Athena]] in ''Snarled Threads''. * TooDumbToLive: Psyche, it is not a good idea to point out psychological issues in public to a vain Love Goddess known to smite any mortal that is too pretty. Arguably all the mortal girls that participated on the beauty pageant in the Delphic games. As Thalia put it, Aphrodite hosted that event to know who to smite. ** Also Chione, mortal lover of both Apollo and Hermes, at the same time. Not only did she two-time a god but she also insulted his overprotective sister Artemis. Honestly, telling a goddess that she is a virgin because no man could possibly want her? That is just asking for death. ** Adonis, who taunted Ares ''and'' two-timed Apollo ''and'' lied about it, ''in front of Artemis''. ** One nymph Thalia met while on Poseidon's court. She bragged to have bedded Zeus and mocked Hera for not realising her. She also pressed Thalia's BerserkButton by insulting Apollo. Thalia took her to Artemis. The nymph proceeded to insult the goddess of the hunt and got skewered by a few arrows as a result. ** Zeus declares himself ''Master of the Fates''. The Muses sum it up rather well. ---> "Holy Hubris." ---> "There is no possible way this ends well." * TrulySingleParent: Mnemosyne to the Muses, Demeter to Persephone, Hera to Hephaestus, and Zeus to Athena. * UnresolvedSexualTension: Referenced by Aphrodite about Apollo’s and Thalia’s banter. * WhyWasteAWedding: When Hephaestus and Aglaea didn’t show up to their wedding, Helios and Rhoda tied the knot. * WildTeenParty: Thalia answers a mortal's prayer for comic inspiration by ordering him to throw one of these on Mt. Parnassus, which will infuriate Apollo. --> '''Thalia:''' Call Pan and Dionysus to the Corycian Cave on the slopes of Mount Parnassus and host a feast. --> '''Eustachys:''' A feast, Lady Thalia? --> '''Thalia:''' Yes, a feast, a festival, a party. Not just any party, a party so awesome that Dionysus will wish it was his idea. Loud, crazy music; tons of wine; a huge bonfire; and, of course, the most uninhibited dancing imaginable. Oh, and do it tonight. --> '''Eustachys:''' But if I do this on Apollo’s very doorstep - --> '''Thalia:''' You can’t see why this is a good idea? Man, no wonder you can’t write comedy.[[http://thaliasmusingsnovels.wordpress.com/2011/05/20/playwright-laureate/]] * [[YetAnotherChristmasCarol Yet Another Cronia Carol]]: [[http://thaliasmusingsnovels.com/2013/12/24/a-cronia-carol/ As a related one-shot]]. * YouNeedToGetLaid: One idiotic nymph made the lethal mistake of saying this to Artemis of all people. ----
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[[quoteright:300:http://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/thalias_musings_logo_small_724.jpg]] ''Thalia's Musings'' is an original WebSerialNovel. It’s narrated by Thalia, the Muse of Comedy, as she observes the comedy, drama, and tragedy of the ancient Greek pantheon. But when Thalia becomes more than an observer, the Fates take notice. Are Thalia’s powers limited to helping mortal playwrights hack out a comedy sketch, or can she create happy endings in real life, even for the gods? The Fates want to know. In the first volume, ''A Snag in the Tapestry'', Thalia and her eight sisters have been ordered by Zeus to leave their home on Mt. Helicon and move to Mt. Parnassus under the governorship of the god Apollo. When Thalia and Apollo raise a cursed nymph from the dead, Thalia starts to wonder if the Muses have greater powers than anyone realized. The Fates, threatened by this possibility, put her to a test. But Thalia cares less about the Fates’ games than the behind-the-scenes drama of the Olympian royal court. In the second volume, ''Snarled Threads'', Thalia is given a new test: she must use her powers to bring about a happy ending for the goddess Athena and her beloved Artemis. But the Fates have decreed that Athena, the Goddess of Wisdom, will never be compromised by Love. When a huntress accuses Artemis of impregnating her, Thalia fears this turn of events is the Fates’ judgement. Meanwhile, Thalia has her own problems as the young demigod Adonis captures the affections of both Aphrodite ''and'' Apollo. In the third volume, ''Unraveled'', it’s been two years since Thalia last heard from the Fates. She has a new mission from Athena: keep Beroe, daughter of Adonis and Aphrodite, alive. Poseidon wants to make Beroe his new queen and use her as leverage to gain a seat at Zeus’ court. Dionysus wants to marry Beroe and give her a life of hedonistic bliss in his forest. Beroe wants to battle for her own hand and join Artemis’ hunters. And Zeus wants Beroe out of the way because she holds the memories of the dead and claims she’s seen him kill Hera. All the more reason for Thalia to keep a secret she’s discovered: Hera’s in love. With the mortal King Ixion. And they may have been set up by Athena. Can Thalia save the people she cares about from becoming collateral damage in Athena’s revolution? Will the revolution succeed before everything comes unraveled? You can read it [[http://thaliasmusingsnovels.com/ here]]. Volumes 1-3 are also available as ebooks on the Kindle and NOOK. It's currently unknown whether there will be a print release or not. ---- !! ''Thalia's Musings'' provides examples of: * AccompliceByInaction: When all is said and done, most Olympians were this towards Artemis and Apollo when Zeus, Hera or their legitimate children abused them. But this does not stop Athéna, Hestia and the muses from offering solace or [[spoiler: Athéna]] to finally defy Zeus in a CrowningMomentOfAwesome. ** Thalia herself seems to mostly not care about everyday mortal problems and most of humans's personal tragedies. Probably justified because she knows all too well, from her sister and her friend's (?) misadventures, that most humans end up living in dull peace, not even remembering you or anything related to their lives. She still snaps out of it in ''really'' depressing cases, like [[spoiler: Echo]]'s, but always keeps it under wraps. * AlmostKiss: Lampshaded by Thalia as it happens to her and Apollo. -->"The Almost Kiss. Such a classic trope in romantic comedy. The concept I am about to reveal to you may be beyond your mortal comprehension, so listen carefully: ''Romantic Comedy'' is what happens when my domain and Aphrodite’s intersect. The fact that she and I have never gotten along terribly well is the reason works in this genre so often fail at being either romantic or comical." [[http://thaliasmusingsnovels.wordpress.com/2011/07/10/1-7-please-be-seated/]] * AllThereInTheManual: The bonus chapters are only available on the [[http://thaliasmusingsnovels.com/table-of-contents/ original website]], not the ebook release. * AnachronismStew: Takes place in Ancient Greece but forks and popcorn exist. Also Thalia refers to Echo’s fragile psyche five chapters prior to the character Psyche showing up and occasionally uses modern [[MemeticMutation memes]]. It’s not too distracting as the story runs on RuleOfFunny. * AnsweringEcho: [[CaptainObvious Echo]]. * {{Asexual}}: Hestia. Artemis claims to be this, but she's secretly in love with Athena. * AwesomenessByAnalysis / ReasonYouSuckSpeech: In the Cronia Carol side story, Thalia does this to [[spoiler: her apparent future self, and by extension, the Fates]], pointing out the vision’s PlotHoles. She wins. * BalefulPolymorph: Hera is very fond of visiting this fate on Zeus's paramours. Io in particular was turned into a cow and then given to Thalia as a pet. * BestialityIsDepraved: To Thalia about a lamb: --> '''Apollo''': Do not call me that creature’s ''daddy''. I’ve never copulated with livestock, which is more than I can say for others in my . . . family. * BrainBleach: It actually exists: a dilution of the water from the river Lethe will effect amnesia in the drinker. * CerebusSyndrome: The dark, trauma-centric parts of the story (ie, [[spoiler:Artemis almost being raped by Zeus; Zeus's abusive relationship with Hera]]) are written very well, with an eye towards sensitivity and GreyAndGreyMorality. Which is good, because in the second volume, there starts to be a '''lot''' of them. * ChekhovsGag: Thalia makes a smart remark about Daphne (following the tree incident) preferring Artemis to Apollo. Several chapters later, we find out that [[spoiler: Daphne had joined Artemis’ hunting group after being spirited away (the tree was left in her place).]] ** In an early chapter, Eustachys writes a play which ends with Apollo and Thalia hooking up. Later, Eros references that part of the play and makes a comment about being in one of his plays. During the Pythian Games, [[spoiler: Eustachys gets last minute inspiration and writes a comedy about Eros and Psyche clueing Thalia in to their whereabouts. One chapter later, he was an actor in the sequel, playing himself.]] * ComedicSociopathy: Thalia's method of answering her worshippers' prayers for comedic inspiration. --> "I try to help [them] by providing a series of comic mishaps in their lives. They never seem very appreciative." [[http://thaliasmusingsnovels.wordpress.com/2011/06/27/1-5-let-the-games-begin/]]. * CoolHorse: Pegasus. Athena gave him to the Muses because he was too smart for her soldiers. * CrapsaccharineWorld: How Thalia describes Mount Olympus to Hades. Also overlaps with GildedCage; the Olympians are ''gods,'' and they can have anything they want...except safety, and the freedom to make their own choices. --> “I hate Zeus’ court. [...] The whole thing’s so fake. It’s all bright and shiny and heavenly and perfect, but Zeus is just…I don’t know, sociopathic? Everyone’s scared of him. And he’s such a perv. I can’t stand being around him. I would never work with him one-on-one like this. And I would certainly never help someone I cared about run away with him. My home is in Zeus’ realm and, as long as humans need to laugh, I don’t see that changing; but sometimes I miss having a king I can respect. You know, to the extent that I respect anything.” * {{Curse}}: The one Hera had placed on poor Echo was a particularly nasty one. * DarkerAndEdgier: The second volume, so much. There's still little bits of comedy, but they're scattered in between Artemis [[spoiler:recovering from Zeus's attempt to rape her, and the attack from Hera that followed, Thalia planning revenge on Zeus for raping Calliope, Athena also planning revenge on Zeus]] and Zeus just generally being [[{{Understatement}} a dick]] to ''everyone.'' * DecoyGetaway: [[spoiler: Echo. Pan creates an ExpendableClone to help her fake her death.]] * DysfunctionalFamily: ** Zeus and Hera's family, both with their legitimate children and Zeus' bastards to whom Hera is the WickedStepmother. ** Hephaestus, Aphrodite, and Eros. ** Averted with the Muses, [[HappilyMarried Hades and Persephone]], and Asclepius and Epione's family. * EarthShatteringKaboom: --> '''Thalia''': “Because if anyone [[spoiler: took Hades away from Persephone]], she wouldn’t turn the earth into a burnt-out wasteland. There would be no earth left. There would be a big black hole in the universe where it used to be.” * EntitledBastard: [[AlternateCharacterInterpretation Aphrodite's opinion on Hephaistos]]. It seems to be flat-out hypocrisy, untill you learn about [[FourthDateMarriage her]] [[WinYourFreedom history]] and his [[InferioritySuperiorityComplex excusable]] [[AbusiveParents self-issues]]. Then, you can kind of see where this is coming from. * EveryoneCanSeeIt: Let's see, Apollo and Thalia have feelings for each other. Hephaestus sympathises with her during the Daphne debacle, Eros and Aphrodite keep offering to set them up together. Even Artemis knows that her brother becomes afflicted with a case of LoveMakesYouStupid when he is showing off for Thalia. Also everyone in Olympus speculates about them. * ExactWords: Aphrodite's GenreSavvy blessing on the Pythian Games: [[spoiler:"To whichever two among the gods and goddesses here whom the Fates will choose, may you each meet your true love at the Pythian Games."]] [[http://thaliasmusingsnovels.wordpress.com/2011/06/27/1-5-let-the-games-begin/]] Thalia, being equally genre savvy, knows that if she or Apollo are chosen, [[spoiler: they won't end up together since they've already met.]] ** The first to be chosen is [[spoiler:Aphrodite's own son Eros, who finds love at first sight with Psyche.]] ** The second is [[spoiler:Hephaestus, Aphrodite's ''husband''. She's more than happy to let him go.]] * {{Fembot}}: Thalia recalls Hephaestus constructing "solid gold, fully automated, mechanical assistants" that were built "in the form of very attractive women." He got rid of them once he had a girlfriend. * FoodFight: Thalia apparently starts these (by asking ‘which art or science is greater than another?’). * GiveGeeksAChance: Hephaestus tries to invoke this in his marriage to Aphrodite. It doesn't work. [[spoiler:After his divorce, he falls for Aglaea, a science-obsessed demigoddess who's had a crush on him for a while.]] * GoldenMoment: Apollo attempts to invoke this trope after Thalia has a narrow brush with Hera's wrath. Thalia can't take it seriously and doubts he does, either. --> '''Apollo:''' Well, that's the end of that. I hope you've learned something. --> '''Thalia:''' [[ItMakesSenseInContext I've learned I am never giving birth.]] [[http://thaliasmusingsnovels.wordpress.com/2011/06/13/1-3-my-kingdom-for-a-pet/]] * [[GoToYourRoom Go To Your Quarters]]: "And stay there until dinner." * GotVolunteered: Happens to Apollo when he tries to get Thalia out of watching eternal adolescent Eros for the day. (She owed Hephaestus a favor.) Hephaestus thinks Apollo is volunteering to help. Apollo is too nice to refuse. * ImplausibleDeniability: Thalia tries this with Apollo when he asks for an explanation of the noise from a WildTeenParty. She claims her sisters are just singing each other to sleep -- [[{{Kesha}} with a parody of ''Tik Tok'']]. * ImmuneToFate: The Fates wonder if Thalia and thus the rest of the Muses are this. They don't like the idea. * IncestIsRelative: Dyonisos and a drunk [[spoiler: Apollo]]. They french-kissed. Once. Both were most probably drunk. [[{{Squick}} We hope]]. * IncrediblyInconvenientDeity: Thalia only agrees to help the playwright Eustachis if he performs a series of actions designed to annoy Apollo and possibly even bring the wrath of the sun god on his head. * INeedAFreakingDrink: “[B]lame the pathetic contestants in the Theater division who drove [Melpomene] and Thalia to the demon rum.” / “And demon wine and demon whiskey.” * InvisibleToNormals: The gods and demigods, unless they choose to be seen and/or heard. * {{Irony}}: When Hera says that during a wedding the attention belongs solely on the bride and groom and on the goddess that made the union possible. What she does not know is that it was Thalia's blessing (At least in part) that made that particular union possible. Thalia of course lampshades this in her thoughts. * KissingUnderTheInfluence: Calliope after the beach party. Also everyone that gets hit by Eros's golden arrows. * LighterAndSofter: Some characters get happier fates than the ones in the original myths: ** In the original myth, she was turned into a laurel tree; instead [[spoiler: Daphne was spirited away, the laurel tree was left in her place, and became a huntress of Artemis.]] ** In the original myth, she was stuck repeating the words of others until she either faded away or Pan caused her death (by having her torn apart by panicking shepherds); instead [[spoiler: Echo regains her voice, spends a time as one of Artemis’ huntresses and (when Hera became suspicious) Pan helped her fake her death. They are now in a shockingly committed relationship with each other and she visits with the other huntresses when they’re off duty.]] ** In the original myth, she was turned into a cow and forced to ‘wander the earth without rest, plagued by a gadfly’; instead [[spoiler: Io regains her human form and escapes to parts unknown with her son.]] ** In the original myth, she was turned into a bear and slain by Artemis; instead [[spoiler: Callisto was healed and hidden in the constellations Ursa.]] ** In the original myth, she was given a monstrous form as punishment; instead [[spoiler: Medusa begged for the form as protection. The cause of her death is still currently unknown.]] * LikeBrotherAndSister: Apollo and Calliope, except on rare occasions when Calliope is drunk. * LoveMakesYouStupid: According to Artemis, Apollo suffers from this. Also Eros after he rescued Psyche. * LovePotion: Eros's arrows and Aphrodite's spells work in that fashion. One notable example is Amphitrite. * NearRapeExperience: [[spoiler:Artemis]] at the hands of Zeus, as Volume 2 reveals. * NoodleIncident: Many. * ParentalMarriageVeto: One of the laws of the Pantheon, even for the Twelve. Apollo tries to invoke this as Governor of the Muses, but is quickly shot down by Calliope. It's strongly implied that Artemis, as Apollo's legal guardian, can invoke this to him. * PassThePopcorn: A couple instances; usually summoned by Thalia. The first time Apollo turns it into charcoal dust, the second he shares it with her, the third he isn't there and Athena disintegrates it saying that it's not time [[LampshadeHanging for comedic props]]. * [[spoiler: RapeAsDrama: The second volume explores some of the darker sides to Greek mythology, when viewed from a modern perspective.]] ** [[spoiler: RapeAsBackstory: Or rather, AttemptedRape as Backstory, for Artemis. This does not actually make it much less traumatic, or so the character implies.]] * RelationshipSalvagingDisaster: Thalia thinks Eros' disappearance will be this to Hephaestus and Aphrodite's troubled marriage. [[spoiler:Averted when the resolution culminates in their long-overdue divorce.]] * RoyallyScrewedUp: Zeus and Hera and their children, ranging from good but troubled (Apollo and Artemis) to flat-out crazy (Eris). * SadlyMythtaken: Primarily averted; the writer apparently [[ShownTheirWork did her research]]. ** EveryoneHatesHades: Also averted, though Thalia mentions it at one point as being the general mortal consensus. A case could be made for the trope being ''inverted'': Hades is one of the few genuinely good and nice gods of the pantheon (if, according to Thalia, 'the ultimate misanthrope introverted loner'), especially when compared to the other Titans' creations (eg. Zeus, Hera...) * ShipperOnDeck: Aphrodite and Eros to Thalia and Apollo. Eros to [[{{LesYay}} Thalia]] and [[{{CrackPairing}} Athena]], Apollo and Daphne, Zeus and Hera, Zeus and Io, etc. ** Thalia to Artemis and Athena, which is half the plot of ''Snarled Threads''. ** Apparently, random Greeks ship ''Team Thalia'' (as well as ''Team Calliope'', ''Team Terpsichore'', ''Team Dionysus'', etc.) * ShowWithinAShow: The play Thalia sponsors at the Pythian Games is Type 3. It provides a safe means of [[spoiler: revealing Eros and Psyche's whereabouts, repenting to Aphrodite, and asking that Psyche be made immortal. Aphrodite and Hera take to the stage to grant both requests.]] * StalkerWithACrush: Almost every god and goddess has done this to a pretty mortal at least once. * StuffBlowingUp: Whatever happened at the last Pythian Games, apparently it included concussive pyrotechnics and made Hephaestus add more fire-proofing and structural reinforcement to the amphitheater. * TangledFamilyTree: It's the Greek Pantheon. * TechnicalVirgin: As if volume two, Artemis and Athena. * TheyDo: [[spoiler: Artemis and Athena]] in ''Snarled Threads''. * TooDumbToLive: Psyche, it is not a good idea to point out psychological issues in public to a vain Love Goddess known to smite any mortal that is too pretty. Arguably all the mortal girls that participated on the beauty pageant in the Delphic games. As Thalia put it, Aphrodite hosted that event to know who to smite. ** Also Chione, mortal lover of both Apollo and Hermes, at the same time. Not only did she two-time a god but she also insulted his overprotective sister Artemis. Honestly, telling a goddess that she is a virgin because no man could possibly want her? That is just asking for death. ** Adonis, who taunted Ares ''and'' two-timed Apollo ''and'' lied about it, ''in front of Artemis''. ** One nymph Thalia met while on Poseidon's court. She bragged to have bedded Zeus and mocked Hera for not realising her. She also pressed Thalia's BerserkButton by insulting Apollo. Thalia took her to Artemis. The nymph proceeded to insult the goddess of the hunt and got skewered by a few arrows as a result. ** Zeus declares himself ''Master of the Fates''. The Muses sum it up rather well. ---> "Holy Hubris." ---> "There is no possible way this ends well." * TrulySingleParent: Mnemosyne to the Muses, Demeter to Persephone, Hera to Hephaestus, and Zeus to Athena. * UnresolvedSexualTension: Referenced by Aphrodite about Apollo’s and Thalia’s banter. * WhyWasteAWedding: When Hephaestus and Aglaea didn’t show up to their wedding, Helios and Rhoda tied the knot. * WildTeenParty: Thalia answers a mortal's prayer for comic inspiration by ordering him to throw one of these on Mt. Parnassus, which will infuriate Apollo. --> '''Thalia:''' Call Pan and Dionysus to the Corycian Cave on the slopes of Mount Parnassus and host a feast. --> '''Eustachys:''' A feast, Lady Thalia? --> '''Thalia:''' Yes, a feast, a festival, a party. Not just any party, a party so awesome that Dionysus will wish it was his idea. Loud, crazy music; tons of wine; a huge bonfire; and, of course, the most uninhibited dancing imaginable. Oh, and do it tonight. --> '''Eustachys:''' But if I do this on Apollo’s very doorstep - --> '''Thalia:''' You can’t see why this is a good idea? Man, no wonder you can’t write comedy.[[http://thaliasmusingsnovels.wordpress.com/2011/05/20/playwright-laureate/]] * [[YetAnotherChristmasCarol Yet Another Cronia Carol]]: [[http://thaliasmusingsnovels.com/2013/12/24/a-cronia-carol/ As a related one-shot]]. * YouNeedToGetLaid: One idiotic nymph made the lethal mistake of saying this to Artemis of all people. ----[[redirect:Literature/ThaliasMusings]]
14th Dec '14 5:58:08 PM loremarie
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update on ebook availability
You can read it [[http://thaliasmusingsnovels.com/ here]]. Volumes 1-3 are complete. The first two volumes are also available as ebooks on the Kindle and NOOK, with the third coming soon. It's currently unknown whether there will be a print release or not.
to:
You can read it [[http://thaliasmusingsnovels.com/ here]]. Volumes 1-3 are complete. The first two volumes are also available as ebooks on the Kindle and NOOK, with the third coming soon.NOOK. It's currently unknown whether there will be a print release or not.
8th Dec '14 1:37:45 PM loremarie
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You can read it [[http://thaliasmusingsnovels.com/ here]]. Volume 3 is currently in progress. The first two volumes are also available as ebooks on the Kindle and Nook. It's currently unknown whether there will be a print release or not.
to:
You can read it [[http://thaliasmusingsnovels.com/ here]]. Volume 3 is currently in progress. Volumes 1-3 are complete. The first two volumes are also available as ebooks on the Kindle and Nook.NOOK, with the third coming soon. It's currently unknown whether there will be a print release or not.
2nd Sep '14 6:10:53 PM LentilSandEater
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Curses....
* EveryoneHatesHades: Despite the aversion it's still worth including, as while noone ''hates'' him, he is an antagonist for some of the story. When not a bad guy he's rather grumpy but seems dedicated to keeping order rather than anything else.
2nd Sep '14 6:08:07 PM LentilSandEater
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* EveryoneHatesHades: Despite the aversion it's still worth includin,g as while noone ''hates'' him, he is an antagonist for some of the story. When not a bad guy he's rather grumpy but seems dedicated to keeping order rather than anything else.
to:
* EveryoneHatesHades: Despite the aversion it's still worth includin,g including, as while noone ''hates'' him, he is an antagonist for some of the story. When not a bad guy he's rather grumpy but seems dedicated to keeping order rather than anything else.
2nd Sep '14 6:07:47 PM LentilSandEater
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Added DiffLines:
* EveryoneHatesHades: Despite the aversion it's still worth includin,g as while noone ''hates'' him, he is an antagonist for some of the story. When not a bad guy he's rather grumpy but seems dedicated to keeping order rather than anything else.
2nd Sep '14 6:04:37 PM LentilSandEater
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* AccompliceByInaction: When all is said and done, most Olympians were this towards Artemis and Apollo when Zeus, Hera or their legitimate children abused them. Partly a JustifiedTrope when they are both the most powerful children of the Titans, but this does not stop Athéna, Hestia and the muses from offering solace or [[spoiler: Athéna]] to finally defy Zeus in a CrowningMomentOfAwesome.
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* AccompliceByInaction: When all is said and done, most Olympians were this towards Artemis and Apollo when Zeus, Hera or their legitimate children abused them. Partly a JustifiedTrope when they are both the most powerful children of the Titans, but But this does not stop Athéna, Hestia and the muses from offering solace or [[spoiler: Athéna]] to finally defy Zeus in a CrowningMomentOfAwesome.
20th Aug '14 12:36:13 PM blackswan
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Added DiffLines:
* TechnicalVirgin: As if volume two, Artemis and Athena.
7th Aug '14 3:40:05 PM loremarie
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You can read it [[http://thaliasmusingsnovels.com/ here]]. Both volumes are also available as ebooks on the Kindle and Nook. It's currently unknown whether there will be a print release or not.
to:
In the third volume, ''Unraveled'', it’s been two years since Thalia last heard from the Fates. She has a new mission from Athena: keep Beroe, daughter of Adonis and Aphrodite, alive. Poseidon wants to make Beroe his new queen and use her as leverage to gain a seat at Zeus’ court. Dionysus wants to marry Beroe and give her a life of hedonistic bliss in his forest. Beroe wants to battle for her own hand and join Artemis’ hunters. And Zeus wants Beroe out of the way because she holds the memories of the dead and claims she’s seen him kill Hera. All the more reason for Thalia to keep a secret she’s discovered: Hera’s in love. With the mortal King Ixion. And they may have been set up by Athena. Can Thalia save the people she cares about from becoming collateral damage in Athena’s revolution? Will the revolution succeed before everything comes unraveled? You can read it [[http://thaliasmusingsnovels.com/ here]]. Both Volume 3 is currently in progress. The first two volumes are also available as ebooks on the Kindle and Nook. It's currently unknown whether there will be a print release or not.
12th Apr '14 5:25:25 AM narm00
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** Thalia herself seems to mosly not care about everyday mortal problems and most of humans's personal tragedies. Probably justified because she knows all too well, from her sister and her friend's (?) misadventures, that most humans end up living in dull peace, not even remembering you or anything related to their lives. She still snaps out of it in ''really'' depressing cases, like [[spoiler: Echo]]'s, but always keeps it under wraps.
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** Thalia herself seems to mosly mostly not care about everyday mortal problems and most of humans's personal tragedies. Probably justified because she knows all too well, from her sister and her friend's (?) misadventures, that most humans end up living in dull peace, not even remembering you or anything related to their lives. She still snaps out of it in ''really'' depressing cases, like [[spoiler: Echo]]'s, but always keeps it under wraps.

** Thalia herself seems * CoolHorse: Pegasus. Athena gave him to mosly not care about everyday mortal problems and most of humans's personal tragedies. Probably justified the Muses because she knows all he was too well, from smart for her sister and her friend's (?) misadventures, that most humans end up living in dull peace, not even remembering you or anything related to their lives. She still snaps out of it in ''really'' depressing cases, like [[spoiler: Echo]]'s, but always keeps it under wraps. soldiers.

* CoolHorse: Pegasus. Athena gave him to the Muses because he was too smart for her soldiers.

* [[GoToYourRoom Go To Your Quarters]]: "And stay there until dinner."

* [[GoToYourRoom Go To Your Quarters]]: "And stay there until dinner."

* IncrediblyInconvenientDeity: Thalia only agrees to help the playwright Eustachis if he performs a series of action designed to annoy Apollo and possibly even bring the wrath of the sun god on his head.
to:
* IncrediblyInconvenientDeity: Thalia only agrees to help the playwright Eustachis if he performs a series of action actions designed to annoy Apollo and possibly even bring the wrath of the sun god on his head.

* IncrediblyInconvenientDeity: Thalia only agrees to help the playwright Eustachis if he performs a series of action designed to annoy Apollo InvisibleToNormals: The gods and possibly even bring the wrath of the sun god on his head.demigods, unless they choose to be seen and/or heard.

* InvisibleToNormals: The gods and demigods, unless they choose to be seen and/or heard.

* StuffBlowingUp: What ever happened at the last Pythian Games, apparently it included concussive pyrotechnics and made Hephaestus add more fire-proofing and structural reinforcement to the amphitheater.
to:
* StuffBlowingUp: What ever Whatever happened at the last Pythian Games, apparently it included concussive pyrotechnics and made Hephaestus add more fire-proofing and structural reinforcement to the amphitheater.

* TrulySingleParent: Mnemosyne to the Muses, Demeter to Persephone, Hera to Hephaestus, and Zeus to Athena. * TooDumbToLive: Psyche, it is not a good idea to point out psychological issues in public to a vain Love Godess known to smite any mortal that is too pretty. Arguably all the mortal girls that participated on the beauty pageant in the Delphic games. As Thalia put it, Aphrodite hosted that event to know who to smite.
to:
* TrulySingleParent: Mnemosyne to the Muses, Demeter to Persephone, Hera to Hephaestus, and Zeus to Athena. * TooDumbToLive: Psyche, it is not a good idea to point out psychological issues in public to a vain Love Godess Goddess known to smite any mortal that is too pretty. Arguably all the mortal girls that participated on the beauty pageant in the Delphic games. As Thalia put it, Aphrodite hosted that event to know who to smite.

Added DiffLines:
* TrulySingleParent: Mnemosyne to the Muses, Demeter to Persephone, Hera to Hephaestus, and Zeus to Athena. * TooDumbToLive: Psyche, it is not a good idea to point out psychological issues in public to a vain Love Godess known to smite any mortal that is too pretty. Arguably all the mortal girls that participated on the beauty pageant in the Delphic games. As Thalia put it, Aphrodite hosted that event to know who to smite.Athena.
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