History Main / PassiveAggressiveKombat

[[quoteright:315:[[ComicBook/KatyKeene https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/katy_keene_costume_put_down_7023.jpg]]]]
[[caption-width-right:315:Looks like the verbal claws are out.]]

* ''Series/{{Amen}}''. Reuben and a doctor Thelma is dating engage in this, with Reuben kicking it off by pointedly introducing himself as "''Dr''. Reuben Gregory". (like many ministers, he has a doctorate in divinity. Then they make idke chitchat about how both of their professions require house calls.

''Sailor Lead Crow''': That's right, you tell them!\\

* ''Radio/OurMissBrooks'': This descibes Miss Brooks' relationship to her SitcomArchNemesis Miss Enright. Whenever the two meet, prepare for a cavalcade of catty remarks. Miss Enright takes the matter further, often dropping a StealthInsult or two about Miss Brooks in front of her students.
-->'''Walter Denton:''' Miss Enright's always saying nice things about you, Miss Brooks.\\
'''Miss Brooks:''' She is? Miss Enright?\\
'''Walter Denton:''' Yes, just the other day Miss Enright said you have the most natural blonde hair she's ever seen on a brunette.

* Khan Noonien Singh once commented on ''[[Series/StarTrekTheOriginalSeries Star Trek]]'', "Social occasions are only warfare concealed." About sums it up.
* [[HolierThanThou Kai Winn]] and [[ServileSnarker Weyoun]], the two most passive-aggressive characters in ''Series/StarTrekDeepSpaceNine'', meet only once, but their conversation is full of veiled barbs and insincerity.
* ''Series/GilmoreGirls'' features it fairly often, particularly when Emily is on-screen. One episode has Lorelai trying to warn Luke about it, but he insists he can take care of himself. After dinner, he declares to Lorelai in astonishment: "I could only thank her! She insulted everything about me and ''I thanked her''!"
-->'''Luke:''' What is this feeling in my chest? This mixture of rage and weakness?\\
'''Lorelai:''' You've been Gilmore'd!
* ''Series/TheGoldenGirls'' is based around this trope. Fortunately, most of this (at least among the main characters) falls under BrutalHonesty.

--->'''Loras:''' ''[smiles smugly]'' [[BrotherSisterIncest And neither will you]]. ''[pats Jaime on the arm]''

* ''Series/Dynasty1981'' breathes this trope. [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gc-h1CrkuIQ Alexis' first meeting with Dominique]] is a textbook example. Dominique went for the kill by pointing out that Alexis' wine had been frozen and thawed.

* ''Series/DowntonAbbey'', being set in a British manor house in the early 1900s, is chock full of this. Mary and Edith, and Violet and Isobel, are the particular champions. When Cora's mother shows up, however, she and Violet play for the World Cup Final, US v UK.

* In ''Series/ArrestedDevelopment'', Lucille and Lucille II engage in this as "primary social rivals", usually these encounters get less subtle and less passive as they go.
* ''Series/{{Farscape}}'': War Minister Ahkna and Commandant Grayza meet in private to discuss a potential treaty, without the knowledge of their superiors. While they are clearly enemies, they manage to maintain a polite(ish) facade, with only occasional barbs about Ahkna's inability to get promoted of late and Grayza's use of her body to get ahead.
* ''Series/{{Rome}}''. Atia of the Julii excels at this, but finds herself outclassed by Cleopatra. When Atia whispers an insult in her ear while giving a goodbye kiss, Cleopatra just smiles in triumph, knowing she's won.
* In ''Series/{{Friends}}'', Ross and Joey engage in this in "The One with the Cheap Wedding Dress" where they meet and date the same girl.
* In ''Series/{{Oshin}}'', the YamatoNadeshiko Oshin engages uses this against [[ObnoxiousInLaws her mother in law Kiyo]] at first, and later against her daughter-in-law Michiko.

* ''Series/{{Billions}}'': This occurs several times between Laura and Wendy, who are put at odds because Wendy is employed by Laura's husband Bobby while her own husband is trying to arrest him. During a party, Laura casually inquires about Wendy's marriage, which she knows is failing. Wendy tries to brush aside the jab by saying, "Marriages are hard." Laura smiles supportively and answers, "Yes, I've heard other people say that!" The next time they see each other, Laura tries to have another go by tactfully explaining why Bobby has instituted a professional barrier between himself and Wendy. Wendy nonchalantly agrees and states that this was exactly why ''she herself'' demanded this rule. Later, Wendy admits that she couldn't resist stinging Laura with the revelation.
* ''Series/TheHandmaidsTale'': June engages in a lot of this by the third season, having learned when she won't be punished as she technically isn't breaking Gilead's laws or mores, or some other factor prevents it.

* The duet "Via resti servita, madame brilliante" from Music/WolfgangAmadeusMozart's ''Theatre/TheMarriageOfFigaro'' involves an exchange of politely delivered insults between Susanna and Marcellina. The latter storms out after Susanna wins by "congratulating" her on her old age.
* ''Theatre/{{Hamilton}}'': In "Your Obedient Servant," Aaron Burr and Alexander Hamilton are at each other's throats, but they still end their statements "I have the honor to be, Your Obedient Servant, *insert name*" with classy music playing in the background.

* ''TabletopGame/VampireTheMasquerade'': This is nearly essential in the DecadentCourt of the Camarilla, particularly in the ruthlessly enforced {{Truce Zone}}s of Elysium, where cutthroat social maneuvering is the only permissible alternative to, well, [[RemovingTheHeadOrDestroyingTheBrain cutting throats]]. The degree depends on the vampire's [[VampireVarietyPack Clan]]; if you're [[BombThrowingAnarchists Brujah]] or [[{{Animorphism}} Gangrel]], it's rather optional, but if you're [[TheBeautifulElite Toreador]] or [[TheChessmaster Ventrue]], it's not only mandatory, it's your life.

* ''Theatre/TheImportanceOfBeingEarnest'': When Gwendolen and Cecily [[spoiler: mistakenly come to believe that they are both engaged to the same man]], they engage in an incredibly vicious yet polite catfight. The unstated rule is that they must insult each other while maintaining the appearance of civility and the one who loses her temper first loses. [[spoiler: Cecily wins.]]
* The verbal battles between Beatrice and Benedick in Creator/WilliamShakespeare's ''Theatre/MuchAdoAboutNothing'' practically define the trope.
%%* A frequent occurrence in the works of Creator/HaroldPinter.

* In ''VisualNovel/DoubleHomework'', the protagonist and Tamara communicate in large part by shit-talking each other. It's slightly deconstructed in the end, with Tamara admitting that she acts like a bitch sometimes because she often can't find healthy ways to express her feelings.
* ''VisualNovel/KatawaShoujo'':
** Lilly and Shizune get into a rather heated war of words over the punctuality of the submission of reports for Student Council activities before the school festival. However, as Shizune is deaf-mute (and Lilly is blind), [[GenkiGirl Misha]] is at hand to translate everything she conveys, and doesn't quite grasp the true context of what the two are actually saying, which diminishes the effect somewhat.
--->'''Lilly:''' I was actually just discussing the budget report before you came by. You must be very talented to have finished all your student council duties so quickly that you can track me down to make sure I don't forget my own.\\
'''Misha: ''[translating for Shizune]''''' Are you accusing me of slacking off? It seems like you're confusing me with yourself~!\\
'''Lilly:''' I don't think so. That would be a very difficult thing for me to do: comparing myself to you.\\
'''Misha:''' You're right, the difference between us is like heaven and hell.\\
'''Lilly:''' And it's not hard to guess which one you might represent.
** Poor Hisao, who's ''much'' more contextually aware, is also tapped once to translate a conversation between the two. His attempts to modulate the argument prove futile.
--->'''Shizune:''' [Turn over here. It's very disrespectful to [[RefugeInAudacity not look at the person you're speaking to]]. That isn't the way a prim and proper lady should conduct herself.]\\
'''Lilly:''' "I'm sorry, such formalities slipped my mind completely. I forgot that the Student Council president is the type who would [[TakeThat demand such respect]] and [[{{Hypocrite}} adherence to the rules]] at all times."\\
'''Shizune:''' [[[RageBreakingPoint I'll devour you!]]]

* ''Webcomic/BrunoTheBandit'': In one arc, Bruno encounters a gang of pirates who wield weaponized passive-aggressiveness. They do it with the help of magic rings that make other people unreasonably concerned about what the pirates think of them.
* ''Webcomic/SomethingPositive'': If they could make money at it, this would be the family business of the [=McIntyres=]. The champion in the family is, generally, agreed to be Faye.

* ''Webcomic/KillSixBillionDemons'': Solomon David is ThePerfectionist and wants for the Multiverse to see him as a stern, paternal and AffablyEvil GodEmperor. Hence, when people annoy him enough his responses tend to take this form. Of course, being an immortal GodEmperor his definitions of 'passive' do not exactly fit into ordinary peoples' definitions: [[spoiler:When 82 White Chain calls him 'tyrant' to his face, his response is to allow every (other) member of the TournamentArc to attack him unhindered and then [[CurbStompBattle butchers them all in less than a second]], [[MakeAnExampleOfThem just to demonstrate to her just how geometrically more powerful than her he is]].]]

%% Image and caption selected per Image Pickin' thread: https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/posts.php?discussion=1317145795042460100
%% Please do not change or remove either without starting a new thread.

* To the suspicion of all else, Paul von Oberstein from ''Literature/LegendOfTheGalacticHeroes''.
* Adale from ''Literature/TheGoodWitchOfTheWest'' was noted, by her enemy whom she'd just beaten in this, to never be at a loss for words.
* Sir Integra Manga/{{Hellsing}} and Father Enrico Maxwell love to engage in this whenever they meet. It comes with the territory when you're the heads of two supernatural hunting organizations on a denominational divide.
* Played more literally than usual in the Territory Arc in ''Manga/YuYuHakusho'', wherein one of the characters with Territory abilities can create a Territory in which violence is not possible, and the only way to beat the other person is to make them say whatever the Taboo might be at the moment. Kurama talked him into making the whole Japanese alphabet taboo one letter (kana) at a time, then made him laugh -- setting off several of the Taboo sounds and beating him at his own game. Also one earlier in the Four Saint Beasts Arc, where at the end Hiei notes that Kurama has to have the last word.
* In ''Literature/{{Corsair}}'', Aura, princess of a pirate clan, is kidnapped by the governor-general of a nearby territory, Jean-Hughes D'Aubigne. Their first conversation with her as a hostage consists of them sharing a meal and speaking in polite monotone while exchanging sentiments such as "It's hard to believe a beauty like you is also a dirty sea pirate."

* Light and L's [[GambitPileup battle of wits]] in ''Manga/DeathNote'' in all its [[MundaneMadeAwesome EPIC passive-aggressive glory]]. At one point, though, Light ''does'' actually just punch L, leading to a brawl. Later [[spoiler: Light and Near's.]]
* When Negi and Fate meet up for a discussion in the Magic World arc of ''Manga/NegimaMagisterNegiMagi'', they sit down for a cup of tea and coffee like gentlemen, seemingly polite and in control, all the while spitting ever more contemptuous and malicious insults and one another's tastes and manners at the table. Even though they're only talking about drinks and what they put in their drinks, the others around the table can't help but back up from the tangible fury building around that table.
* Anthy Himemiya of ''Anime/RevolutionaryGirlUtena'' is a master at this, though it's also [[{{Deconstruction}} deconstructed]] in that it's the only way she ''can'' fight back, having been [[spoiler:emotionally anesthetized by years of emotional and sexual manipulation by her ManipulativeBastard of a {{brother|SisterIncest}}, [[BigBad Akio Ohtori]]]]. The ''one'' time [[BrutalHonesty Anthy talks straight to the point]] is [[spoiler:after Utena's HeroicSacrifice for her- she manages to break the cycle of abuse [[ButNowIMustGo and walks out on Akio]], leaving Ohtori with Chuchu [[IWillFindYou to find Utena]]]].

* Being a deconstruction of the FightingSeries PlayedForLaughs, ''Manga/RamenFighterMiki'' deconstructs PassiveAggressiveKombat reminding us that this is the weapon of the people who cannot win a physical confrontation, but also [[PowerAtAPrice takes a psychological toll on those who use it]]:
** Megumi has been bullied by Miki all her life, but she knew she cannot defeat Miki in a physical confrontation, so she has adopted a CombatPragmatist philosophy and never passes on a chance to verbally humiliate Miki… at the price of developing a terrible GuiltComplex: Megumi is so a BitchInSheepsClothing that she believes herself a CardCarryingVillain due to her self-hatred.
** Miki can beat physically any person in the world… except her own mother, Makiko. As a consequence, Miki never uses PassiveAggressiveKombat in anyone except her mother: Miki always finds a way to [[DamnedByFaintPraise call her mother "ugly", "old" or "fat"]], or being TheSlacker in the family restaurant… at the price of being a ManChild, sponging out his own mother.

--->'''Sailor Aluminum Seiren''': I don't believe this!
--->'''Sailor Lead Crow''': That's right, you tell them!
--->'''Sailor Aluminum Seiren''': ''They put their shoes on the table!''
--->'''Sailor Uranus''': Oh it, it was an accident.
--->'''Sailor Neptune''': We're so sorry!
* In ''Manga/Brave10'', this is Kanetsugu Naoe's forte, being quick of wit and vaguely disdainful towards everyone.
* In ''Manga/KaguyaSamaLoveIsWar'', most of Kaguya and Shrogane's flirting is done through canonical subtext, since neither of them feel comfortable openly admitting their feelings and they are often surrounded by people. Their aim is to make the other person lose their composure and confess... but their "war of love" humiliates them both more than if they were just honest about their feelings. Fujiwara also gets in on the action in chapter 84 when Kaguya stealing her role as Shirogane's dance teacher causes her dialogue to suddenly become a lot more sarcastic than usual.

* Every single conversation that Keith and Gerald have in ''Literature/MyNextLifeAsAVillainessAllRoutesLeadToDoom'' is dripping with very obvious subtext as they battle for Katarina's attention. [[CaptainOblivious Katarina being who she is]], she just sees them as being close friends.
* In ''Manga/BloomIntoYou'', Sayaka engages in this from time to time.
** After hearing Touko call Yuu by her first name, Sayaka offers to do the same. She then retracts that offer, saying that she didn't call her kouhais at her old middle school by their first names, as a way of subtly expressing jealousy over how close Touko and Yuu are.
** After hearing that her former senpai is sorry about getting her interested in girls (as opposed to suddenly dumping her and breaking her heart), Sayaka gives a polite but backhanded reassurance that she's no longer interested in her senpai.
** She also frequently reminds Yuu of her status as Touko's kohai. By doing so, Sayaka subtly asserts that as Touko's best friend, she's closer to Touko than Yuu is.

* ''ComicBook/Transformers2019'': Optimus Prime and Megatron are introduced having a civil meeting about Megatron's social activism... which is to say, Megatron spends an entire conversation verbally castrating Optimus with [[StealthInsult thinly veiled insults and threats]]. Later, Megatron tries this again with [[OldSoldier Ironhide]] at a memorial service, only for Ironhide to [[SubvertedTrope just straight up insult him to his face]] (and nearly get decked for it).

* In ''Fanfic/AKnightsTaleAsInquisitor'', [[BadassBureaucrat Josephine]] and [[IronLady Vivienne]] engage in this with each other during their first conversation in the story, exchanging honey-coated words with sharpened blade tongues.
* ''Webcomic/HetaliaAxisPowers'' fanfic ''[[https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11886910/1/Gankona-Unnachgiebig-Unità Gankona, Unnachgiebig, Unità]]'': Germany and Japan engaged in ''plenty'' of this over Italy before their [[CockFight cock fight]]. More aggressive than passive though.

* In the ''Franchise/{{Danganronpa}}'' fanfic ''Fanfic/HopeOnADistantMountain'', Hope's Peak headmaster Jin Kirigiri spends most of his meeting with the school's steering committee bringing up all the bad and stupid things they've done in the story, though always politely and never actually accusing them of doing anything wrong. He finishes up with some ParentheticalSwearing.

* ''WebVideo/VisionOfEscaflowneAbridged'': The TropeNamer, which spoofed Hitomi's and Millerna's discussions in the real ''Anime/TheVisionOfEscaflowne'' series over who would get Allen. Basically, each fight [[MundaneMadeAwesome starts and end with an]] Franchise/MortalKombat-style [[MundaneMadeAwesome announcer presenting them as intense, brutal fights]] (complete with "-ality!" puns), even though the actual scenes are just them calmly talking. The RunningGag first shows up [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=bqieymT7z14#t=176s here at 2:56.]]

* In the ''WesternAnimation/MyLittlePonyFriendshipIsMagic'' fanfic ''[[https://www.fimfiction.net/story/217039/warmongering Warmongering,]]'' a Diamond Dog king sends Celestia a letter declaring war, and demands she give up a number of spoils or be destroyed. Celestia responds as if he was canceling a dinner reservation, then starts aimlessly talking about some new inventions of her country (which can be used as weapons), the trade treaties that she has with him (which she just canceled), and the fact that she ''[[PhysicalGod controls the sun]]'' (and how she "accidentally" dropped it a little low over his capital, raising the temperature to a hundred and twenty degrees for a minute). By the end, all of his allies have pledged their support to Celestia and he has to deal with a war from a completely different country. In the last line of the fic, she drops the act.

* ''Fanfic/ChildrenOfRemnant'': Summer notes that this is one of Ozpin's qualities that she can't help but respect - with everything that he says, it's near impossible to tell if it's just a statement of fact, setting up a new argument, or a thinly veiled insult.

* In ''Film/ShallWeDance'' (1937), this scene where Denise, the StalkerWithACrush, meets Linda, the new wife of the man she's been pursuing.
-->'''Denise:''' You know, you're a lot more intelligent than you look.\\
'''Linda:''' Why, thank you. I wish I could say the same of you.
* The first ''Film/IronMan1'' movie has a wonderful little example between Pepper Potts and Christine Everhart.
-->'''Pepper:''' ''[after Stark's one night stand with Christine]'' I have your clothes here; they've been dry cleaned and pressed. And there's a car waiting for you outside that will take you anywhere you'd like to go.\\
'''Christine:''' ''[patronizing tone]'' You must be the famous Pepper Potts.\\
'''Pepper:''' ''[smiles and nods]'' Indeed I am.\\
'''Christine:''' After all these years, Tony still has you picking up the dry cleaning.\\
'''Pepper:''' I do anything and everything Mr. Stark requires. Including, occasionally, taking out the trash. Will that be all?

-->'''Hatsumomo:''' What a beautiful dance, yes Pumpkin? ''[breaking out her own fans]'' Her fans are so hypnotic, that you never notice her feet! ''[some applause]'' What's her name?\\

'''Sayuri:''' ''[lighting a cigarette]'' Of course. But... it's been such a very long... long... ''[blows out her match]'' ...[[OldMaid long, long time]].\\
''[everyone laughs, and Hatsumomo finally drops the smile]''
* From ''Film/StarTrek2009'':
-->'''[[StrawVulcan Vulcan Council President]]:''' Why did you come before this council today? Was it to satisfy your emotional need to rebel?\\
'''[[HalfHumanHybrid Spock]]:''' The only emotion I wish to convey is gratitude. Thank you, Ministers, for your consideration. ''([[ParentheticalSwearing in a tone reserved for telling someone to "Go to Hell"]])'' Live long and prosper.
* This is used as the [[SelfDeprecation Jews' ultimate weapon]] in ''Film/TheHebrewHammer'', where Mordechai takes on the stereotypical JewishMother persona and runs with it.
* Obi-Wan's brief meeting with Jango Fett in ''Franchise/StarWars: [[Film/AttackOfTheClones Episode II]]'', to the point that Boba Fett's origin story contains a comparison between that conversation and a swordfight.
* ''Film/GosfordPark'': Dame Creator/MaggieSmith's character is an expert at this, making backhanded compliments and snide remarks to everyone in earshot. She takes particular interest in attacking the woman from a working-class background, complimenting her for being so refreshingly economic in only bringing one formal gown to the weekend. This is [[{{hypocrite}} hypocritical]] of her, since she's only there to beg for money from her richer relative.

''[later]''\\

* Similarly, the 1982 film of ''Literature/EvilUnderTheSun'' contains these exchanges from Daphne Castle (Dame Creator/MaggieSmith) and Arlena Marshall (Diana Rigg):
-->'''Daphne Castle:''' Arlena and I are old sparring partners.\\
'''Arlena Marshall:''' Hello, Daphne.\\
'''Daphne:''' Oh, it's been years.\\
'''Arlena:''' A little time, yes.\\
'''Daphne:''' Years. Arlena and I were in the chorus of a show together. Not that I could ever compete. Even in those days, she could always throw her legs up in the air higher than any of us. [[ReallyGetsAround And wider.]]\\
'''Arlena:''' Kenneth, this is such a surprise! When you told me of an island run by a quaint little landlady, I had no idea it was Daphne Castle.\\
'''Kenneth Marshall:''' ''[embarrassed]'' Er, yes, quite. Daphne, I wonder if we could go to our rooms. It's been a long journey.\\
'''Daphne:''' Oh, certainly. ''[rings the bell, and calls out]'' Andreas! ''[no response]''\\
'''Arlena:''' If you're short-staffed, Kenneth can easily carry the bags.\\
'''Daphne:''' They'll be brought up in a minute! Do have a good, long, peaceful rest, Arlena.\\
''[later, during that evening's cocktail gathering]''\\
'''Arlena:''' ''[making a grand entrance]'' Oh my, I'm the last to arrive!\\
'''Daphne:''' [[DoubleEntendre Have a sausage, dear.]] You must be famished, having to wait all that time in your room.
* Many of the voice actors at Gustave's party in ''Film/InAWorld'' engage in this.

* A refrigerator is also the site of Passive Aggressive Kombat in ''Literature/TheLongDarkTeaTimeOfTheSoul''... Dirk Gently does not want to open it before his housekeeper cleans it, and sets up elaborate, tiny traps to be able to tell if she has, one including a strand of hair. The refrigerator turns out to be so epic in its filth that [[spoiler:it spawns a horrible god-eating abomination when it's finally opened.]]
* Amaranta Buendía from ''Literature/OneHundredYearsOfSolitude'' is a ''master'' of this. Her favorite targets are her first boyfriend Pietro Crespi [[spoiler: who's DrivenToSuicide for it]], her DoggedNiceGuy Gerineldo Márquez, and her niece-in-law Fernanda.
* ''Literature/TheReynardCycle'': This is so common amongst the nobility of the series that it's practically their language. The females of one family [[GangOfHats wear it as their hat.]] Only the Countess Persephone seems to be above resorting to it.
* ''Literature/ASongOfIceAndFire'':
** Sansa Stark is left with only her [[DamnedByFaintPraise pretty words]], extensive [[LogicalFallacies knowledge of both story]] and [[ChewbaccaDefense song tropes]], as well as [[ExactWords carefully applied stock phrases]] to [[MetaphoricallyTrue lie cautiously]] with, as well as her hard-won [[PolitenessJudo courtesy and politeness]] to use as either a deliberate [[SarcasmBlind counter-snark defence]] or the occasionally subtle attack when she winds up as a hostage in a DecadentCourt. She gets increasingly good at it, although her [[LooseLips start]] was, [[WrongGenreSavvy by any measure]], [[BreakTheCutie rocky]].
** [[AlphaBitch Cersei Lannister]] is accomplished at this when she pulls back on the aggressive side, as when she tells Margaery Tyrell that she's "never seen her as a rival," which Margaery (publicly, at least) takes as a denial of ill-feeling between them but which Cersei intends as implying that she does not view Margaery as a worthy opponent.
** Olenna Tyrell is pretty nifty with the [[DeadpanSnarker dry (and obvious) verbal stab to the diaphragm]], but even when she's backed you into a corner where you simply can't publically take offence at a rude little old lady's words without looking like an untutored, ungrateful prole, she's not left anybody in hearing range with the remotest doubt about how vicious the attack actually was. Her whole reliance on the stock "just a harmless, horrible old biddy" schtick is there so she can launch attacks and get away with it.
%% * Neferet from ''Literature/TheHouseOfNight'' possesses a black belt in passive aggressive dialogue. Overlaps into PolitenessJudo whenever Thanatos and Neferet share a scene.
* In ''[[Literature/AnnalsOfTheWesternShore Gifts]]'' by Creator/UrsulaKLeGuin, Canoc Caspro tries to fight Ogge Drum this way while he and his family are guests at Drummant. It takes several attempts for his jibes and implications to work, though, since he's fencing and Ogge is using a bludgeon.

* ''Literature/{{Cryptonomicon}}'': Randy Waterhouse's girlfriend doesn't like his beard, but he doesn't want to get rid of it. She then launches an in-depth study into the psychology behind male beard growth and shaving. The relationship doesn't work out. When America finds the study in Randy's home, she bluntly asks if this was how arguments in their relationship went.
* [[Literature/TheScrewtapeLetters Screwtape]] advises his nephew, Wormwood, to entice his "patient" into this sort of routine in order to build up a mutual disdain in families with everyone seeking to be "unselfish". Specifically, he wants Wormwood to deliberately make his "patient" fall into the AbileneParadox, [[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Abilene_paradox here at The Other Wiki]].
* Every great strategist in the ''{{Literature/Romance Of The Three Kingdoms}}'', but the absolute zenith must be Zhuge Liang, who writes a letter so insulting it makes the ill Cao Zhen angry enough to die.

* ''Literature/TheWheelOfTime'': Among the Aiel ProudWarriorRace, deft social use of their honour code is one alternative to actual combat. The would-be Shaido Clan Chief asks to enter a Roofmistress' lands with the form a true Chief would use, daring her to either accept or insult the Shaido by turning him away. Instead, she formally invites him in... with the words used to grant charity to the destitute.
-->'''Aviendha:''' As one friendless and alone. She has welcomed him as a beggar. The gravest insult to him, and none to the Shaido.

* Laernan Kite and Lisana from ''Literature/MirrorDreams'' do this every time they are in court. Kite even narrates their conversations as if they are engaged in a tennis match. Initially, this is because they are trying to bring the other down over either past slights or currying favour with the king. [[spoiler: By the end however, they've become staunch allies, but still continue taking shots at one another because it's what they've always done.]]