History Main / MilitariesAreUseless

2nd Apr '18 1:21:15 AM Khrunwahl02
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* One reason why the U.S. military scarcely appears in ''WesternAnimation/TransformersPrime'' is that Agent Fowler clears them out of any potential Decepticon attack because Decepticons are too powerful and strong for humans to challenge as only Autobots can counteract Decepticon actions of war. The U.S. military's uselessness is visually demonstrated in the Season 3 premiere when Megatron uses his newfound fortress Darkmount to wipe them out immediately (since the Autobots were unavailable).
30th Mar '18 2:26:36 AM Khrunwahl02
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* ''VideoGame/DestroyAllHumans'': As the protagonist of the game is Crypto, an alien [[AlienInvasion bent on destroying humans]], the military arrive to oppose him but because their technology is much weaker and less advanced than Furon technology, Crypto manages to defeat the entire U.S. military within a few days and inaugurate himself as the new President of the United States. Even before and if Crypto never came to earth, the military was already doing a horribly bad job defending their country because Majestic was mind controlling American citizens with junk food, television, and a government run by puppets (that includes putting in a puppet as the President) right under the military's noses.

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* ''VideoGame/DestroyAllHumans'': As the protagonist of the game is Crypto, an alien [[AlienInvasion bent on destroying humans]], the military arrive to oppose him but because their technology is much weaker and less advanced than Furon technology, Crypto manages to defeat the entire U.S. military within a few days and inaugurate himself as the new President of the United States. Even before and if Crypto never came to earth, the military was already doing a horribly bad job defending their country fighting for freedom because Majestic was mind controlling American citizens with junk food, television, and a government run by puppets (that includes putting in a puppet as the President) right under the military's noses.
30th Mar '18 2:26:09 AM Khrunwahl02
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* ''VideoGame/DestroyAllHumans'': As the protagonist of the game is Crypto, an alien [[AlienInvasion bent on destroying humans]], the military arrive to oppose him but because their technology is much weaker and less advanced than Furon technology, Crypto manages to defeat the entire U.S. military within a few days and inaugurate himself as the new President of the United States. Even if Crypto never came to earth, the military was useless to their country because Majestic was mind controlling American citizens with junk food, television, and a government run by puppets (that includes putting in a puppet as the President) right under the military's noses.

to:

* ''VideoGame/DestroyAllHumans'': As the protagonist of the game is Crypto, an alien [[AlienInvasion bent on destroying humans]], the military arrive to oppose him but because their technology is much weaker and less advanced than Furon technology, Crypto manages to defeat the entire U.S. military within a few days and inaugurate himself as the new President of the United States. Even before and if Crypto never came to earth, the military was useless to already doing a horribly bad job defending their country because Majestic was mind controlling American citizens with junk food, television, and a government run by puppets (that includes putting in a puppet as the President) right under the military's noses.
30th Mar '18 1:55:16 AM Khrunwahl02
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* In ''Series/TheWalkingDead'', the U.S. Armed Forces were wiped out by the walkers so fast that they have already been long gone when Rick Grimes woke up from his coma, which between 4 to 6 weeks. The series mainly shows their demise by scattering military equipment in cities. Ironically, the whole show's premise focuses on a group of survivors fighting for their lives even though they can't possibly be as powerful or large in numbers as the U.S. Armed Forces, although it's possible the reason why the main cast composed of Rick Grimes, Glenn Rhee and all others are surviving while the U.S. military didn't is that they learned how to sneak through the walkers using strategy, quick thinking and planning out how to evacuate as while the U.S. soldiers tried executing all walkers in the shortest amount of time possible, which was a fatally bad idea given there were too many walkers to be killed just by manpower, and weapon firing noises attract even more walkers.

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* In ''Series/TheWalkingDead'', the U.S. Armed Forces were wiped out by the walkers so fast that they have already been long gone when Rick Grimes woke up from his coma, which lasted between 4 to 6 weeks. The series mainly shows their demise by scattering military equipment in cities. Ironically, the whole show's premise focuses on a group of survivors fighting for their lives even though they can't possibly be as powerful or large in numbers as the U.S. Armed Forces, although it's possible the reason why the main cast composed of Rick Grimes, Glenn Rhee and all others are surviving while the U.S. military didn't is that they learned how to sneak through the walkers using strategy, quick thinking and planning out how to evacuate as while the U.S. soldiers tried executing all walkers in the shortest amount of time possible, which was a fatally bad idea given there were too many walkers to be killed just by manpower, and weapon firing noises attract even more walkers.
30th Mar '18 1:54:03 AM Khrunwahl02
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* ''VideoGame/DestroyAllHumans'': The U.S. military are too weak to repel Crypto's efforts to start harvesting humans for their brain stems, since humans have been selected to be the cattle for Crypto's dying race. Even before Crypto arrived, the military was already doing a pretty bad job since they unknowingly allowed evil secret agency Majestic drug the food supply of an entire suburban town turning them into aggressive zombies.

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* ''VideoGame/DestroyAllHumans'': The As the protagonist of the game is Crypto, an alien [[AlienInvasion bent on destroying humans]], the military arrive to oppose him but because their technology is much weaker and less advanced than Furon technology, Crypto manages to defeat the entire U.S. military are too weak to repel Crypto's efforts to start harvesting humans for their brain stems, since humans have been selected to be within a few days and inaugurate himself as the cattle for Crypto's dying race. new President of the United States. Even before if Crypto arrived, never came to earth, the military was already doing a pretty bad job since they unknowingly allowed evil secret agency useless to their country because Majestic drug was mind controlling American citizens with junk food, television, and a government run by puppets (that includes putting in a puppet as the food supply of an entire suburban town turning them into aggressive zombies. President) right under the military's noses.
27th Mar '18 11:28:34 AM xcountryguy
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* At the end of ''WesternAnimation/TheIncredibles'', when the [[spoiler: [[AttackOfThe50FootWhatever Giant Omnidroid]] attacks some random cities]], the army's response is basically "send some guys attack it with tanks [[FiveRoundsRapid and submachine-guns]], [[ScrewThisImOutOfHere then run]]!". Syndrome's {{Mook}}s don't pass up the opportunity to mock this and [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fAhbgIXd4Oo "take a shot everytime they run"]].

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* At the end of ''WesternAnimation/TheIncredibles'', when the [[spoiler: [[AttackOfThe50FootWhatever [[spoiler:[[AttackOfThe50FootWhatever Giant Omnidroid]] attacks some random cities]], the army's response is basically "send some guys attack it with tanks [[FiveRoundsRapid and submachine-guns]], [[ScrewThisImOutOfHere then run]]!". Syndrome's {{Mook}}s don't pass up the opportunity to mock this and [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fAhbgIXd4Oo "take a shot everytime they run"]].



** ''Film/ManOfSteel'' is a hardcore aversion. While the Kryptonians are well beyond the ability of the military to harm with what they ahve on hand in the film, the US Air Force is depicted as thoroughly competent and doing the best they can against the invaders. In fact, they save Superman's life a couple of times, and ultimately [[spoiler: it is them, and not Superman, who sends most of the Kryptonians back to the Phantom Zone.]]

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** ''Film/ManOfSteel'' is a hardcore aversion. While the Kryptonians are well beyond the ability of the military to harm with what they ahve on hand in the film, the US Air Force is depicted as thoroughly competent and doing the best they can against the invaders. In fact, they save Superman's life a couple of times, and ultimately [[spoiler: it [[spoiler:it is them, and not Superman, who sends most of the Kryptonians back to the Phantom Zone.]]



** ''Film/WonderWoman'' averts it. The film establishes early on that Wonder Woman is ''not'' ImmuneToBullets and neither are her superhuman Amazon sisters (who take grievous casualties fighting a tiny lightly armed German landing party), so she still has to be mindful when fighting regular human soldiers. She has a MultinationalTeam of BadassNormal soldiers from the various Allied nations of World War I accompanying her as sidekicks, and both they and the RedShirt troops seen in battle scenes prove their mettle as support. Most notably when they take advantage of the hole punched in the German lines by Wonder Woman near Veld to flank their trench line, and when they take out a machine gun that was pinning her down. Props go especially to Steve, who saves Wonder Woman from getting shot early on and later [[spoiler: is the one to stop the BigBad's super-weapon plot via his HeroicSacrifice. [[CollateralAngst This helps inspire Wonder Woman]] in her fight against Ares.]]

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** ''Film/WonderWoman'' averts it. The film establishes early on that Wonder Woman is ''not'' ImmuneToBullets and neither are her superhuman Amazon sisters (who take grievous casualties fighting a tiny lightly armed German landing party), so she still has to be mindful when fighting regular human soldiers. She has a MultinationalTeam of BadassNormal soldiers from the various Allied nations of World War I accompanying her as sidekicks, and both they and the RedShirt troops seen in battle scenes prove their mettle as support. Most notably when they take advantage of the hole punched in the German lines by Wonder Woman near Veld to flank their trench line, and when they take out a machine gun that was pinning her down. Props go especially to Steve, who saves Wonder Woman from getting shot early on and later [[spoiler: is [[spoiler:is the one to stop the BigBad's super-weapon plot via his HeroicSacrifice. [[CollateralAngst This helps inspire Wonder Woman]] in her fight against Ares.]]



* ''Film/WarOfTheWorlds''. Despite the movie's name, it's not so much of a war as it is an invasion and given how powerful the Martians are, fighting them is a stupid idea. The U.S. military score zero hits on the Tripods, who are well shielded by an energy barrier that can deflect all man-made missiles and bullets. The U.S. soldiers are more of an obstacle than assistance for the film's protagonists, as they block Ray and his children's path to the boat. In the end, it turns out the best military mankind had against the Tripods were [[spoiler: the earth's bacteria]].

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* ''Film/WarOfTheWorlds''. Despite the movie's name, it's not so much of a war as it is an invasion and given how powerful the Martians are, fighting them is a stupid idea. The U.S. military score zero hits on the Tripods, who are well shielded by an energy barrier that can deflect all man-made missiles and bullets. The U.S. soldiers are more of an obstacle than assistance for the film's protagonists, as they block Ray and his children's path to the boat. In the end, it turns out the best military mankind had against the Tripods were [[spoiler: the [[spoiler:the earth's bacteria]].



--> '''Malloy:''' We sent in a five-man rescue team. Within a few hours of landing on the island all but one of them were dead.
--> '''Snake:''' [[SarcasmMode Hell of a team.]]

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--> '''Malloy:''' -->'''Malloy:''' We sent in a five-man rescue team. Within a few hours of landing on the island all but one of them were dead.
-->
dead.\\
'''Snake:''' [[SarcasmMode Hell of a team.]]
20th Mar '18 2:51:58 PM AHI-3000
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* ''Film/Godzilla2014''. As per usual for these films. However, they eventually [[CharacterDevelopment realize this]] and decide to just dismantle their plans to kill all of the kaiju (which might not have even worked at all) and just do their part to [[WeNeedADistraction distract the MUTOs]] so Godzilla can kill them. Though to his credit, Lieutenant Ford ''does'' succeed in taking out the [=MUTOs=] eggs which not only stopped the world from being overrun by the things, but also pissed and distracted the [=MUTO=] long enough for Godzilla to get his HeroicSecondWind.

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* ** ''Film/Godzilla2014''. As per usual for these films. However, they eventually [[CharacterDevelopment realize this]] and decide to just dismantle their plans to kill all of the kaiju (which might not have even worked at all) and just do their part to [[WeNeedADistraction distract the MUTOs]] so Godzilla can kill them. Though to his credit, Lieutenant Ford ''does'' succeed in taking out the [=MUTOs=] eggs which not only stopped the world from being overrun by the things, but also pissed and distracted the [=MUTO=] long enough for Godzilla to get his HeroicSecondWind.
17th Mar '18 1:26:34 PM gophergiggles
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* In both ''Film/EscapeFromNewYork'' and ''Film/EscapeFromLA'', the militaries of the United States are completely incapable of recovering either the President or the MacGuffin stolen by the President's daughter, forcing them to send BoxedCrook Snake Pliskin in to do the job. This is [[LampshadeHanging lampshaded]] in L.A.:
--> '''Malloy:''' We sent in a five-man rescue team. Within a few hours of landing on the island all but one of them were dead.
--> '''Snake:''' [[SarcasmMode Hell of a team.]]



** Nobody expected the [[BodyguardingABadass Royal Guards]] to stand up against [[MadGod Nightmare Moon]], but even with warning of a potential attack and being fully mobilized and ready, they are subdued by the changeling army in about ten minutes. Contrast the six main characters, who, without [[VillainBeatingArtifact the Elements of Harmony]] or formal training, and being ''caught off guard'', take down hundreds before finally [[ZergRush being grossly outnumbered]] and surrendering. While it's largly PlayedForLaughs, they can't even handle [[ArsonMurderAndJaywalking recovering Princess Celestia's pet bird]]. In the Season 4 premiere, where Princesses Celestia and Luna go missing, Princess Twilight Sparkle instructs the Guards to continue the search, only for Twilight and friends to find them themselves. Even their captain Shining Armor, despite being an allegedly powerful good leader, spends every major threat incapacitated and whose finest hour is ''throwing his exhausted-to-the-point-of-collapse wife at the threat so she could deal with it instead''. This is at least partly due to StoryBreakerPower; until their leader took him out with her scheme he was successfully holding off the entire Changeling army by himself, and when his wife broke the spell he took them all out in one shot.

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** Nobody expected the [[BodyguardingABadass Royal Guards]] to stand up against [[MadGod Nightmare Moon]], but even with warning of a potential attack and being fully mobilized and ready, they are subdued by the changeling army in about ten minutes. Contrast the six main characters, who, without [[VillainBeatingArtifact the Elements of Harmony]] or formal training, and being ''caught off guard'', take down hundreds before finally [[ZergRush being grossly outnumbered]] and surrendering. While it's largly PlayedForLaughs, they can't even handle [[ArsonMurderAndJaywalking recovering Princess Celestia's pet bird]]. In the Season 4 premiere, where Princesses Celestia and Luna go missing, Princess Twilight Sparkle instructs the Guards to continue the search, only for Twilight and friends to find them themselves. In ''To Where And Back Again'' they were absolutely incapable of preventing Queen Chrysalis's changelings from invading and replacing every single key member of Equestria's government, despite it literally being the exact same tactic she used last time. Even their captain Shining Armor, despite being an allegedly powerful good leader, spends every major threat incapacitated and whose finest hour is ''throwing his exhausted-to-the-point-of-collapse wife at the threat so she could deal with it instead''. This is at least partly due to StoryBreakerPower; until their leader took him out with her scheme he was successfully holding off the entire Changeling army by himself, and when his wife broke the spell he took them all out in one shot.
9th Mar '18 4:30:41 PM Khrunwahl02
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* In ''WesternAnimation/DespicableMe3'', Balthazar Bratt's fictional TV show "Evil Bratt" had him build a giant robotic duplicate of himself to wreak havoc on Hollywood making the U.S. Army open fire on him but to no avail and the army's commander shrieks at the sight of Bratt firing giant chewing gum bubbles and orders them to retreat. When Bratt does this for real, the army doesn't even show up but that would come to reason since the U.S. Army doesn't have troops stationed in Hollywood.
28th Feb '18 1:00:15 AM SeptimusHeap
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* The volunteer army in SinAndPunishment that was organized to fight the Ruffians are apparently so supremely bad at their job that the LaResistance movement that Saki belongs to was put together just to take ''both'' of them out. The game then starts with the resistance movement getting ''completely wiped out'' down to three people.

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* The volunteer army in SinAndPunishment VideoGame/SinAndPunishment that was organized to fight the Ruffians are apparently so supremely bad at their job that the LaResistance movement that Saki belongs to was put together just to take ''both'' of them out. The game then starts with the resistance movement getting ''completely wiped out'' down to three people.
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