History Literature / FenimoreCoopersLiteraryOffences

8th Feb '16 5:01:52 AM Freshmeat
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->''The Pathfinder'' and ''The Deerslayer'' [[MagnumOpus stand at the head of Cooper's novels as artistic creations]]. There are others of his works which contain parts as perfect as are to be found in these, and [[CrowningMomentOfAwesome scenes even more thrilling]]. Not one can be compared with either of them as a finished whole.\\

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->''The Pathfinder'' and ''The Deerslayer'' [[MagnumOpus stand at the head of Cooper's novels as artistic creations]].creations. There are others of his works which contain parts as perfect as are to be found in these, and [[CrowningMomentOfAwesome scenes even more thrilling]]. Not one can be compared with either of them as a finished whole.\\
7th Feb '16 11:22:02 AM Xoorligan
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A work of art? [[ClicheStorm It has no invention]]; [[RandomEventsPlot it has no order, system, sequence, or result]]; [[RealisticDictionIsUnrealistic it has no lifelikeness]], [[EightDeadlyWords no thrill, no stir]], [[CriticalResearchFailure no seeming of reality]]; [[CharacterDerailment its characters are confusedly drawn]], and by their acts and words they prove that [[InformedAttribute they are not the sort of people the author claims that they are]]; [[HumorDissonancey its humor is pathetic]]; [[{{Narm}} its pathos is funny]]; its conversations are--oh! [[SeinfeldianConversation indescribable]]; [[StrangledByTheRedString its love-scenes odious]]; [[BadWriting its English a crime against the language]].

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A work of art? [[ClicheStorm It has no invention]]; [[RandomEventsPlot it has no order, system, sequence, or result]]; [[RealisticDictionIsUnrealistic it has no lifelikeness]], [[EightDeadlyWords no thrill, no stir]], [[CriticalResearchFailure no seeming of reality]]; [[CharacterDerailment its characters are confusedly drawn]], and by their acts and words they prove that [[InformedAttribute they are not the sort of people the author claims that they are]]; [[HumorDissonancey [[HumorDissonance its humor is pathetic]]; [[{{Narm}} its pathos is funny]]; its conversations are--oh! [[SeinfeldianConversation indescribable]]; [[StrangledByTheRedString its love-scenes odious]]; [[BadWriting its English a crime against the language]].
7th Feb '16 11:21:44 AM Xoorligan
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A work of art? [[ClicheStorm It has no invention]]; [[RandomEventsPlot it has no order, system, sequence, or result]]; [[RealisticDictionIsUnrealistic it has no lifelikeness]], [[EightDeadlyWords no thrill, no stir]], [[CriticalResearchFailure no seeming of reality]]; [[CharacterDerailment its characters are confusedly drawn]], and by their acts and words they prove that [[InformedAttribute they are not the sort of people the author claims that they are]]; [[DudeNotFunny its humor is pathetic]]; [[{{Narm}} its pathos is funny]]; its conversations are--oh! [[SeinfeldianConversation indescribable]]; [[StrangledByTheRedString its love-scenes odious]]; [[BadWriting its English a crime against the language]].

to:

A work of art? [[ClicheStorm It has no invention]]; [[RandomEventsPlot it has no order, system, sequence, or result]]; [[RealisticDictionIsUnrealistic it has no lifelikeness]], [[EightDeadlyWords no thrill, no stir]], [[CriticalResearchFailure no seeming of reality]]; [[CharacterDerailment its characters are confusedly drawn]], and by their acts and words they prove that [[InformedAttribute they are not the sort of people the author claims that they are]]; [[DudeNotFunny [[HumorDissonancey its humor is pathetic]]; [[{{Narm}} its pathos is funny]]; its conversations are--oh! [[SeinfeldianConversation indescribable]]; [[StrangledByTheRedString its love-scenes odious]]; [[BadWriting its English a crime against the language]].
28th Jan '16 7:32:31 PM vifetoile
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The ark is one hundred and forty feet long; the dwelling is ninety feet long. The idea of the Indians is to drop softly and secretly from the arched sapling to the dwelling as the ark creeps along under it at the rate of a mile an hour, and butcher the family. It will take the ark a minute and a half to pass under. It will take the ninety foot dwelling a minute to pass under. Now, then, what did the six Indians do? [[WhatAnIdiot It would take you thirty years to guess, and even then you would have to give it up, I believe]]. Therefore, I will tell you what the Indians did. Their chief, a person of [[OverlyNarrowSuperlative quite extraordinary intellect for a Cooper Indian]], warily watched the canal-boat as it squeezed along under him, and when he had got his calculations fined down to exactly the right shade, as he judged, he let go and dropped. And missed the house! [[NotMakingThisUpDisclaimer That is actually what he did.]] He missed the house, and landed in the stern of the scow. It was not much of a fall, yet it knocked him silly. He lay there unconscious. If the house had been ninety-seven feet long he would have made the trip. The fault was Cooper's, not his. The error lay in the construction of the house. Cooper was no architect.

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The ark is one hundred and forty feet long; the dwelling is ninety feet long. The idea of the Indians is to drop softly and secretly from the arched sapling to the dwelling as the ark creeps along under it at the rate of a mile an hour, and butcher the family. It will take the ark a minute and a half to pass under. [[LudicrousSpeed It will take the ninety foot dwelling a minute to pass under.under]]. Now, then, what did the six Indians do? [[WhatAnIdiot It would take you thirty years to guess, and even then you would have to give it up, I believe]]. Therefore, I will tell you what the Indians did. Their chief, a person of [[OverlyNarrowSuperlative quite extraordinary intellect for a Cooper Indian]], warily watched the canal-boat as it squeezed along under him, and when he had got his calculations fined down to exactly the right shade, as he judged, he let go and dropped. And missed the house! [[NotMakingThisUpDisclaimer That is actually what he did.]] He missed the house, and landed in the stern of the scow. It was not much of a fall, yet it knocked him silly. He lay there unconscious. If the house had been ninety-seven feet long he would have made the trip. The fault was Cooper's, not his. The error lay in the construction of the house. Cooper was no architect.
28th Jan '16 7:16:15 PM vifetoile
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Especially humerous due to its [[ExpospeakGag old-timey]] language. If this was written today it would probably be incredibly boring.



->''The Pathfinder'' and ''The Deerslayer'' [[DamnedByFaintPraise stand at the head of Cooper's novels as artistic creations]]. There are others of his works which contain parts as perfect as are to be found in these, and [[CrowningMomentOfAwesome scenes even more thrilling]]. Not one can be compared with either of them as a finished whole.\\

to:

->''The Pathfinder'' and ''The Deerslayer'' [[DamnedByFaintPraise [[MagnumOpus stand at the head of Cooper's novels as artistic creations]]. There are others of his works which contain parts as perfect as are to be found in these, and [[CrowningMomentOfAwesome scenes even more thrilling]]. Not one can be compared with either of them as a finished whole.\\
8th Dec '15 10:33:19 AM 434411423124222344
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Added DiffLines:


Especially humerous due to its [[ExpospeakGag old-timey]] language. If this was written today it would probably be incredibly boring.
6th Jun '15 2:04:30 PM AnonFangeekGirl
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# They require that the author shall make the reader [[RuleOfEmpathy feel a deep interest in the personages of his tale and in their fate]]; and that he shall make the reader love the good people in the tale and hate the bad ones. But the reader of the ''Deerslayer'' tale [[TheScrappy dislikes the good people in it]], is indifferent to the others, and wishes [[RocksFallEveryoneDies they would all get drowned together.]]

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# They require that the author shall make the reader [[RuleOfEmpathy feel a deep interest in the personages of his tale and in their fate]]; and that he shall make the reader love the good people in the tale and hate the bad ones. But the reader of the ''Deerslayer'' tale [[TheScrappy dislikes the good people in it]], [[EightDeadlyWords is indifferent to the others, others]], and wishes [[RocksFallEveryoneDies they would all get drowned together.]]
18th May '15 1:23:18 PM Schol-R-LEA
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The conversations in the Cooper books have a curious sound in our modern ears. To believe that such talk really ever came out of people's mouths would be to believe that there was a time when time was of no value to a person who thought he had something to say; when it was the custom to spread a two-minute remark out to ten; when a man's mouth was a rolling-mill, and busied itself all day long in turning four-foot pigs of thought into thirty-foot bars of conversational railroad iron by attenuation; when subjects were seldom faithfully stuck to, but the talk wandered all around and arrived nowhere; when conversations consisted mainly of irrelevancies, with here and there a relevancy, a relevancy with an embarrassed look, as not being able to explain how it got there.

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The conversations in the Cooper books have a curious sound in our modern ears. To believe that such talk really ever came out of people's mouths would be to believe that there was a time when [[TalkingIsAFreeAction time was of no value to a person who thought he had something to say; say]]; when it was the custom to spread a two-minute remark out to ten; when a man's mouth was a rolling-mill, and busied itself all day long in turning four-foot pigs of thought into thirty-foot bars of conversational railroad iron by attenuation; when subjects were seldom faithfully stuck to, but the talk wandered all around and arrived nowhere; when conversations consisted mainly of irrelevancies, with here and there a relevancy, a relevancy with an embarrassed look, as not being able to explain how it got there.
20th Feb '15 9:19:17 AM MasterWonderMage
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For the little-known Part II, see '''[[http://www.strangebeautiful.com/papers/twain-coopers-prose-style.pdf Fenimore Cooper's Further Literary Offences]]: [[SnarkBait Cooper's Prose Style]].''' (1895) (PDF, 6 pg)

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For the little-known Part II, see '''[[http://www.strangebeautiful.com/papers/twain-coopers-prose-style.com/other-texts/twain-coopers-prose-style.pdf Fenimore Cooper's Further Literary Offences]]: [[SnarkBait Cooper's Prose Style]].''' (1895) (PDF, 6 pg)
5th Feb '15 9:50:32 PM LBHills
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->''The Pathfinder'' and ''The Deerslayer'' [[SoCoolItsAwesome stand at the head of Cooper's novels as artistic creations]]. There are others of his works which contain parts as perfect as are to be found in these, and [[CrowningMomentOfAwesome scenes even more thrilling]]. Not one can be compared with either of them as a finished whole.\\

to:

->''The Pathfinder'' and ''The Deerslayer'' [[SoCoolItsAwesome [[DamnedByFaintPraise stand at the head of Cooper's novels as artistic creations]]. There are others of his works which contain parts as perfect as are to be found in these, and [[CrowningMomentOfAwesome scenes even more thrilling]]. Not one can be compared with either of them as a finished whole.\\
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