History JustForFun / ThingsWeHaveLearntFromMedia

4th Aug '16 5:08:35 AM WillyFourEyes
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** So are [[ThereAreNoGoodExecutives corporations]]. Actually, let's just say it outright, [[EvilVersusEvil everyone]] [[HobbesWasRight is]] [[HumansAreBastards evil]]. If you hate all of humanity, then you're clearly a deep moral thinker. But if you hate only one race, then you're a racist.

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** So are [[ThereAreNoGoodExecutives corporations]]. Actually, let's just say it outright, [[EvilVersusEvil everyone]] [[HobbesWasRight is]] [[HumansAreBastards [[HumansAreTheRealMonsters evil]]. If you [[MisanthropeSupreme hate all of humanity, humanity]], then you're clearly a deep moral thinker. But if you hate only one race, then you're a racist.



** And not to mention [[XenaWarriorPrincess King David, Julius Caesar and Boudicca are all contemporaries, the Trojan Wars happened a few years before the birth of Christ, and katana-wielding samurai existed in Japan at the same time as them all.]] These things did ''not'' [[AnachronismStew happen/exist over a period of several thousand years, as we have been led to believe.]]

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** And not to mention [[XenaWarriorPrincess [[Series/XenaWarriorPrincess King David, Julius Caesar and Boudicca are all contemporaries, the Trojan Wars happened a few years before the birth of Christ, [[{{Jesus}} Christ]], and katana-wielding samurai existed in Japan at the same time as them all.]] These things did ''not'' [[AnachronismStew happen/exist over a period of several thousand years, as we have been led to believe.]]



* Even if [[YouSuck you're astonishingly stupid and incompetent]], following your dreams will make them come true. Always.

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* Even if [[YouSuck [[ThisLoserIsYou you're astonishingly stupid and incompetent]], following your dreams will make them come true. Always.



** ''Side-effects may vary, your goodness [[LoveMakesYouEvil may go down]] as well as up. Please consult your physician.''

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** ''Side-effects may vary, vary; your goodness [[LoveMakesYouEvil may go down]] as well as up.up. May also result in [[LoveMakesYouCrazy insanity]] or [[LoveMakesYouDumb loss of good judgment]]. Please consult your physician.''



* [[CuteKidsAndRobots Children, robots]] and [[RidiculouslyCuteCritter animals]] are really annoying but [[InfantImmortality never die]].

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* [[CuteKidsAndRobots Children, robots]] robots and [[RidiculouslyCuteCritter animals]] are really annoying but [[InfantImmortality never die]].



* God exists and takes all the good Christians in Hollywood to Heaven; everyone else burns in Hell.

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* God {{God}} exists and takes all the good Christians in Hollywood to Heaven; [[FluffyCloudHeaven Heaven]]; everyone else [[FireAndBrimstoneHell burns in Hell.Hell]].



* Absolutely anything can be made to [[RuleOfCool look cool]], or at least as though it's [[MundaneMadeAwesome supposed to be cool,]] with judicious use of CameraTricks, stirring speeches and a suitably rousing classical or rock soundtrack.

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* Absolutely anything can be made to [[RuleOfCool look cool]], or at least as though it's [[MundaneMadeAwesome supposed to be cool,]] with judicious use of CameraTricks, stirring speeches and a suitably rousing classical [[OrchestralBombing classical]] or rock [[EpicRocking rock]] soundtrack.



* All men are unfulfilled unless they are drinking the right beer, have huge penises, and have hair that both exists and is not grey. Unless they are Scottish or [[NotEvenBotheringWithTheAccent British pretending to be French]]. Then, [[GrandmaWhatMassiveHotnessYouHave having grey hair or being bald just makes them sexier]].

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* All men are unfulfilled unless they are drinking the right beer, have [[BiggerIsBetterInBed huge penises, penises]], and have hair that both exists and is not grey. Unless they are Scottish or [[NotEvenBotheringWithTheAccent British pretending to be French]]. Then, [[GrandmaWhatMassiveHotnessYouHave having grey hair or being bald just makes them sexier]].



* [[ThoseWackyNazis The Nazis]] were sufficiently advanced to create an army of vampires and an effeminate catboy who exists everywhere and nowhere at once due to a quantum singularity dividing his existence by zero. And math is the only way to kill {{Dracula}}. (''Manga/{{Hellsing}}'')

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* [[ThoseWackyNazis The Nazis]] were [[StupidJetpackHitler sufficiently advanced advanced]] to [[Manga/{{Hellsing}} create an army of vampires and an effeminate catboy who exists everywhere and nowhere at once due to a quantum singularity dividing his existence by zero.zero]]. And math is the only way to kill {{Dracula}}. (''Manga/{{Hellsing}}'')



* At least 1 percent of Americans, and 1 percent of British citizens, are serial killers.

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* At least 1 percent of Americans, and 1 percent of British citizens, are serial killers.{{serial killer}}s.



* Hitting someone's head (it helps to have an implement, but your fist will do) very, very hard is a safe, easy, and effective way of knocking him out for anywhere from several minutes to a few hours. He may say, "Oooh, my head hurts," when he awakes, or hold an icepack to his forehead (regardless of where you hit him), but he'll be just fine.
** It is also the perfect way to cause or cure retrograde amnesia.

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* [[TapOnTheHead Hitting someone's head head]] (it helps to have an implement, but your fist will do) very, very hard is a safe, easy, and effective way of knocking him out for anywhere from several minutes to a few hours. He may say, "Oooh, my head hurts," when he awakes, or hold an icepack to his forehead (regardless of where you hit him), but he'll be just fine.
** It is also the perfect way to [[EasyAmnesia cause or cure retrograde amnesia.amnesia]].



* Bullying is wrong. Crushing people's minds, however, is A-OK!
* The {{Jerkass}} wil always find a way to avoid elimination, and will always avoid retribution until the finals or semi-finals, when he gets an appropriatly karmic comeupance from the EnsembleDarkHorse.
* [[TheAnnoyingOrange Oranges are annoying, even to each other]].

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* [[WebVideo/YuGiOhTheAbridgedSeries Bullying is wrong. Crushing people's minds, however, is A-OK!
A-OK!]]
* The {{Jerkass}} wil always [[EliminationHoudini find a way to avoid elimination, elimination]], and will always avoid retribution until the finals or semi-finals, when he gets an appropriatly karmic comeupance comeuppance from the EnsembleDarkHorse.
* [[TheAnnoyingOrange [[WebVideo/TheAnnoyingOrange Oranges are annoying, even to each other]].



* If you like anything not intended for your age bracket or sex -- or worse, both -- you are a pedophile.

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* If you like anything [[PeripheryDemographic not intended for your age bracket or sex sex]] -- or worse, both -- you are a pedophile.



* ''Anything'' in life can be connected to--[[{{Misblamed}} or]] [[HateDumb blamed on]]--''TheSimpsons''.

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* ''Anything'' in life can be connected to--[[{{Misblamed}} or]] [[HateDumb blamed on]]--''TheSimpsons''.on]]--''WesternAnimation/TheSimpsons''.



** And [[MortalKombat have magical powers.]]

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** And [[MortalKombat [[Franchise/MortalKombat have magical powers.]]



* Any name, no matter how strange, unpronounceable or [[NamesToRunAwayFromReallyFast obviously evil]] it is, can be passed off with "Hm, must be foreign".

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* Any name, no matter how strange, unpronounceable or [[NamesToRunAwayFromReallyFast obviously evil]] it is, can be passed off with "Hm, [[AsLongAsItSoundsForeign must be foreign".foreign]]".



* Reality television is more sadistic and satanic than all of the fictional Hollywood bloodbaths combined. It can never truly be socially conscious. There's absolutely no difference between a show like "Jersey Shore" and a show like "Survivor" despite the former being about drinking and partying and the latter being about working together to survive. The absolute worst fate that anyone can suffer is being told that his or her singing sucks on American Idol by Simon Cowell.
* Men and women can never just be friends without falling in love. True love always happens on first sight. If the characters hate each other, it is written in the stars that they'll love each other in the end.
* Television news programs are nothing but propaganda and trashy celebrity gossip. Except for comedian commentators who are never afraid to tell it like it is.

to:

* Reality television is more sadistic and satanic than all of the fictional Hollywood bloodbaths combined. It can never truly be socially conscious. There's absolutely no difference between a show like "Jersey Shore" ''Series/JerseyShore'' and a show like "Survivor" ''Series/{{Survivor}}'' despite the former being about drinking and partying and the latter being about working together to survive. The absolute worst fate that anyone can suffer is being told that his or her singing sucks on American Idol ''Series/AmericanIdol'' by Simon Cowell.
* Men and women can never [[PlatonicLifePartners just be friends without falling in love. love]]. [[LoveAtFirstSight True love always happens on first sight.sight]]. If the characters hate each other, it is written in the stars that they'll love each other in the end.
* [[StrawmanNewsMedia Television news programs are nothing but propaganda and trashy celebrity gossip. gossip]]. Except for [[Series/TheDailyShow comedian commentators commentators]] [[Series/LastWeekTonightWithJohnOliver who are never afraid to tell it like it is.is]].
26th Jul '16 5:43:12 PM vtarira
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*** Cars have short-range warp drives so they can [[Series/CoronationStreet be in Salford one second and Ashton-under-Lyne the next]] or [[Series/TwentyFour negotiate L.A. traffic in a matter of minutes]].

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*** ** The exception is [[UsefulNotes/WashingtonDC Washington, D.C.]], whose landmarks are only visible from helicopter altitude. Otherwise, the city is made up [[TheMountainsOfIllinois entirely of skyscrapers]].
** All large American cities that ''aren't'' instantly associated with a few iconic landmarks (and which aren't [[HollywoodCalifornia Los Angeles]]) are also made up entirely of skyscrapers. All their streets are laid out neatly on a compass-aligned grid, and are all two-way and never under construction.
**
Cars have short-range warp drives so they can [[Series/CoronationStreet be in Salford one second and Ashton-under-Lyne the next]] or [[Series/TwentyFour negotiate L.A. traffic in a matter of minutes]].
24th Mar '16 4:18:06 PM nombretomado
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*** Cars have short-range warp drives so they can [[CoronationStreet be in Salford one second and Ashton-under-Lyne the next]] or [[Series/TwentyFour negotiate L.A. traffic in a matter of minutes]].

to:

*** Cars have short-range warp drives so they can [[CoronationStreet [[Series/CoronationStreet be in Salford one second and Ashton-under-Lyne the next]] or [[Series/TwentyFour negotiate L.A. traffic in a matter of minutes]].
11th Mar '16 2:47:32 PM search
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** So are [[ThereAreNoGoodExecutives corporations]]. Actually, let's just say it outright, [[EvilVersusEvil everyone]] [[HobbesWasRight is]] [[HumansAreBastards evil]].

to:

** So are [[ThereAreNoGoodExecutives corporations]]. Actually, let's just say it outright, [[EvilVersusEvil everyone]] [[HobbesWasRight is]] [[HumansAreBastards evil]]. If you hate all of humanity, then you're clearly a deep moral thinker. But if you hate only one race, then you're a racist.



* There are never any positive stereotypes of people you admire/negative stereotypes of people you despise. Besides, all of the positive stereoptypes of people you admire/negative stereotypes of people you despise are absolutely 100% true.

to:

* There are never any positive stereotypes of people you admire/negative stereotypes of people you despise. Besides, all of When the positive stereoptypes news media demonstrates bias in favor of people you admire/negative stereotypes your opinions, then it's the pure truth. When they demonstrate bias against your point of people you despise are absolutely 100% true.view, then it's nothing but corrupt political propaganda.



* It's always very important to be an intelligent and virtuous person even if doing so will make you a social outcast. If you succeed it's due to nothing more than your own hard work and grit, but if you're a smart person and you still fail it's because other people are always discouraging you and trying to drag you down.

to:

* It's always very important to be an intelligent and virtuous person even if doing so will make you a social outcast. If you succeed it's due to nothing more than your own hard work and grit, but if you're a smart person and you still fail it's because other people are always discouraging you and trying to drag you down.down.
*Victorian England was a utopia of refinement and civility. They never oppressed anyone, no one ever lived in poverty or squalor and the men were all effeminate, sensitive, and gay even though Alan Turing was chemically castrated for homosexuality and anti-gay laws were only officially repealed in 2003.
11th Mar '16 1:39:42 PM search
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----

to:

--------
*Reality television is more sadistic and satanic than all of the fictional Hollywood bloodbaths combined. It can never truly be socially conscious. There's absolutely no difference between a show like "Jersey Shore" and a show like "Survivor" despite the former being about drinking and partying and the latter being about working together to survive. The absolute worst fate that anyone can suffer is being told that his or her singing sucks on American Idol by Simon Cowell.
*Men and women can never just be friends without falling in love. True love always happens on first sight. If the characters hate each other, it is written in the stars that they'll love each other in the end.
*Television news programs are nothing but propaganda and trashy celebrity gossip. Except for comedian commentators who are never afraid to tell it like it is.
*Petty rudeness is the absolute worst thing that anyone can do and fully justifies them being assaulted or killed. Unless they're somewhere where everyone's afraid to speak the truth.
*All bad behavior is caused by either extreme emotional insecurity from not having a loving family or extreme arrogance and an unshakeable belief in one's godlike stature or abilities. The best and only way to teach someone a lesson is to either humiliate them or do the same thing to them.
*All mainstream media is nothing but trash and propaganda. Unless you agree with its message. Then it should be shown and analyzed in a college classroom.
*There are never any positive stereotypes of people you admire/negative stereotypes of people you despise. Besides, all of the positive stereoptypes of people you admire/negative stereotypes of people you despise are absolutely 100% true.
*If a white man murders a woman or a minority in cold blood, then society throws him a parade, but if a woman or a minority walks on grass with a "Do Not Walk" sign, then they're automatically given the death penalty.
*Attractive people are destroying our society with their vanity and superficiality. But boy, they sure are good at making products with their face on them fly off the shelves.
*Being naked means being vulnerable, but being violent and depraved makes you invincible.
*It's always very important to be an intelligent and virtuous person even if doing so will make you a social outcast. If you succeed it's due to nothing more than your own hard work and grit, but if you're a smart person and you still fail it's because other people are always discouraging you and trying to drag you down.
18th Oct '15 4:02:38 AM Morgenthaler
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* There is no such place as UsefulNotes/NorthEastEngland. Unless you're BillyElliot or TheLikelyLads.

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* There is no such place as UsefulNotes/NorthEastEngland. Unless you're BillyElliot Film/BillyElliot or TheLikelyLads.Series/TheLikelyLads.
26th Jun '15 3:05:37 PM Morgenthaler
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* [[NeverTheSelvesShallMeet Never go back in time and meet yourself.]] [[Film/BackToTheFuturePartII You may either pass out from the shock, or create a paradox which will destroy the universe.]] [[TimeCop And if you dare to touch your past self, you will horribly melt into nothing.]]

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* [[NeverTheSelvesShallMeet Never go back in time and meet yourself.]] [[Film/BackToTheFuturePartII You may either pass out from the shock, or create a paradox which will destroy the universe.]] [[TimeCop [[Film/TimeCop And if you dare to touch your past self, you will horribly melt into nothing.]]
11th May '15 1:46:33 PM nombretomado
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* [[HighlyVisibleNinja Ninjas can be always identified as such by what they wear,]] especially if [[GodfreyHoNinjaMovies they wear headbands describing their profession.]]

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* [[HighlyVisibleNinja Ninjas can be always identified as such by what they wear,]] especially if [[GodfreyHoNinjaMovies [[Film/GodfreyHoNinjaMovies they wear headbands describing their profession.]]
30th Jan '15 2:35:53 PM 1810072342
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** [[NotGoodWithRejection RejectionMakesYouEvil]].

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** [[NotGoodWithRejection RejectionMakesYouEvil]].Rejection Makes You Evil]].
30th Jan '15 2:35:17 PM 1810072342
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** RejectionMakesYouEvil.
** TortureMakesYouEvil.

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** RejectionMakesYouEvil.
[[NotGoodWithRejection RejectionMakesYouEvil]].
** TortureMakesYouEvil.BeingTorturedMakesYouEvil.
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