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History JustForFun / HowToSurviveAWarMovie

9th Apr '16 10:52:51 AM Morgenthaler
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** Especially if the helmet [[SavingPrivateRyan just stopped a bullet from going through my head]].

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** Especially if the helmet [[SavingPrivateRyan [[Film/SavingPrivateRyan just stopped a bullet from going through my head]].



* If I am a sniper, I will change my firing position frequently and I will never ever ever [[SavingPrivateRyan sit in a bell tower]] or any other place with only one way down.

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* If I am a sniper, I will change my firing position frequently and I will never ever ever [[SavingPrivateRyan [[Film/SavingPrivateRyan sit in a bell tower]] or any other place with only one way down.
5th Mar '16 10:39:39 AM nombretomado
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* If my brother or best friend tells me he's just signed up for the military because there is a war on, even though I may be tempted to join the military myself, I will instead sign up for a stateside job making rifles, bullets, first-aid supplies, or something else that's usually in short supply during a war, but under no circumastances will I sign up on my own. If drafted, I will not request to be transferred to my brother's unit.
** ...Unless, of course, you ARE the [[DeathByOriginStory brother/bestfriend.]] Then just make sure they don't get [[CaptainAmerica super-powers or something]].

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* If my brother or best friend tells me he's just signed up for the military because there is a war on, even though I may be tempted to join the military myself, I will instead sign up for a stateside job making rifles, bullets, first-aid supplies, or something else that's usually in short supply during a war, but under no circumastances circumstances will I sign up on my own. If drafted, I will not request to be transferred to my brother's unit.
** ...Unless, of course, you ARE the [[DeathByOriginStory brother/bestfriend.]] Then just make sure they don't get [[CaptainAmerica [[ComicBook/CaptainAmerica super-powers or something]].
4th Jan '16 2:32:43 PM nombretomado
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* If I am an Aristocratic Austrian ShellShockedVeteran married to a ManicPixieDreamGirl and I am [[TheSoundOfMusic offered command of a Nazi submarine]] I will stop to win a singing contest before running to Switzerland. Getting the help of my wife's nun buddies will also be a good idea.

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* If I am an Aristocratic Austrian ShellShockedVeteran married to a ManicPixieDreamGirl and I am [[TheSoundOfMusic [[Theatre/TheSoundOfMusic offered command of a Nazi submarine]] I will stop to win a singing contest before running to Switzerland. Getting the help of my wife's nun buddies will also be a good idea.
22nd Nov '15 5:59:19 PM nombretomado
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** Unless the LegionsOfHell [[TheSalvationWar march in large formation wielding bronze weaponry]], in which case the only claymore I'm going to use is claymore mines. Lots and lots of them.

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** Unless the LegionsOfHell [[TheSalvationWar [[Literature/TheSalvationWar march in large formation wielding bronze weaponry]], in which case the only claymore I'm going to use is claymore mines. Lots and lots of them.
5th Jul '15 3:09:48 PM Morgenthaler
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** And if I am in charge of a British force, I will - to the best of my ability - ''try'' not to put aside my [[StiffUpperLip British]] OfficerAndAGentleman stick, ''try'' [[ThePatriot to look past my prejudice against the Americans' fighting prowess]] and ''try'' to be more competent than my American counterpart - it will not only ''not'' get me killed, but I will damn well win, too ([[FailureIsTheOnlyOption or at least come as close to winning as possible]]).

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** And if I am in charge of a British force, I will - to the best of my ability - ''try'' not to put aside my [[StiffUpperLip British]] OfficerAndAGentleman stick, ''try'' [[ThePatriot [[Film/ThePatriot to look past my prejudice against the Americans' fighting prowess]] and ''try'' to be more competent than my American counterpart - it will not only ''not'' get me killed, but I will damn well win, too ([[FailureIsTheOnlyOption or at least come as close to winning as possible]]).
8th Jun '15 5:33:44 PM ShinyTsukkomi
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** Unless it's one of those [[BreakTheCutie horribly depressing]] WorldGoneMad flicks where I [[GraveOfTheFireflies starve to death]]. In which case I will get through the occupation by becoming a LoveableRogue.

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** Unless it's one of those [[BreakTheCutie horribly depressing]] WorldGoneMad flicks where I [[GraveOfTheFireflies [[Anime/GraveOfTheFireflies starve to death]]. In which case I will get through the occupation by becoming a LoveableRogue.
21st May '15 5:07:54 PM nombretomado
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* If I am a German soldier in WWII, I will transfer to [[HogansHeroes Stalag 13]] ''immediately''.

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* If I am a German soldier in WWII, I will transfer to [[HogansHeroes [[Series/HogansHeroes Stalag 13]] ''immediately''.
12th May '15 3:30:08 AM SeptimusHeap
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* I will not have a quirk or skill that endears me to the rest of my unit, like, say, [[TheLongestDay making really good coffee in the coffeepot I carry with me.]]

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* I will not have a quirk or skill that endears me to the rest of my unit, like, say, [[TheLongestDay [[Film/TheLongestDay making really good coffee in the coffeepot I carry with me.]]
19th Mar '15 7:58:31 PM nombretomado
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* If I have the option to serve alongside an old schoolfriend, I will consider my options carefully. If I have ever wronged my friend or "owe" him in any other way, I will find another regiment[[note]]Unless I'm a total cad - see {{Flashman}}[[/note]]. If he is better looking than I am, I will find another regiment. If, however, I am unequivocally the better looking, I will fight at his side with confidence.

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* If I have the option to serve alongside an old schoolfriend, I will consider my options carefully. If I have ever wronged my friend or "owe" him in any other way, I will find another regiment[[note]]Unless I'm a total cad - see {{Flashman}}[[/note]].{{Literature/Flashman}}[[/note]]. If he is better looking than I am, I will find another regiment. If, however, I am unequivocally the better looking, I will fight at his side with confidence.
1st Mar '15 7:04:44 AM Viira
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* [[strike:Two]] Three bits of advice for armies in general:

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* [[strike:Two]] Three bits of advice for armies in general:



** Better yet, I will be an agnostic, and discuss my beliefs. Agnostics never die, they just [[strike:fade away]] survive to write the book on which the film is based.

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** Better yet, I will be an agnostic, and discuss my beliefs. Agnostics never die, they just [[strike:fade away]] survive to write the book on which the film is based.
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