History Funny / TopGear

12th Feb '16 7:54:59 AM Euan2000
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** While they're traveling across the deadliest road in the world, James, who is terrified of heights, threatens the other two with his machete if they rear-end him. Jeremy truly accidentally does, not that this stops James from sticking a machete through his window. Hammond is in the back and you can't tell if he's scared or just amused.
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** While they're traveling travelling across the deadliest road in the world, James, who is terrified of heights, threatens the other two with his machete if they rear-end him. Jeremy truly accidentally does, not that this stops James from sticking a machete through his window. Hammond is in the back and you can't tell if he's scared or just amused.amused. --> '''Richard:''' Did your co-presenter on your television programme just attack you with a machette.\\ '''Jeremy:''' Yes he did. He came to the window and he was quite cross because I ran into him.\\ '''Richard:''' That doesn't happen on, like, clothes programmes or gardening shows.
11th Feb '16 4:20:16 AM GF93
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-->'''Hammond:''' I've got a new name for you on the tag handle, it's called ''Selfish Bastard!''

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** To get back at Hammond for driving off after the aforementioned [[BuffySpeak Sports-Lorry-Reversing-Into]], James and Jeremy come across the reservoir on the roof of his truck that powers his Shower, and ''urinate in it''. What really sells it is when the two hear Hammond taking a shower later on with it, blissfully unaware of what's been going on- -->'''Hammond:''' It's actually warm! So warm, fresh rainwater... -->'''Clarkson:''' ''[Quietly, to James]'' Golden Rain! -->'''Hammond:''' [[{{Squick}} ...you can taste the goodness!]] ''[Jeremy and James burst out laughing]'' And neither of you two ''idiots'' thought of it! ** Later on, James and Richard play a prank on Jeremy when he's asleep in the back of his Sports Lorry (Which James masterminds out of revenge for swinging him around in his tent)- -->'''Clarkson:''' What the-?! ''[The back of his Sports Lorry tips up, causing him and his bed to fall out of it]'' '''JEEEESUS ''CHRIIIIIIIIIIST!''''' -->'''May:''' ''[Voiceover]'' The next morning, despite the tranquillity of our surroundings, Jeremy hit the road in a fractious mood. -->'''Clarkson:''' ''[Angrily]'' Why did you tip me out of my Lorry?! -->'''May:''' Because you swung me around in my tent! -->'''Clarkson:''' Well you deserved that, because you're irritating! ''[[NeverMyFault I'm never irritating!]]'' -->'''May:''' [[SarcasmMode That's a good point Jeremy raises- I-I feel quite bad about it now,]] [[DeadpanSnarker because when's he ever been irritating?]]
8th Feb '16 7:36:56 AM axle-k89
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** Or as Biggles and Algy or as [[Film/TopGun Maverick and Iceman]].
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** Or as Biggles Ginger and Algy or as [[Film/TopGun Maverick and Iceman]].

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** Or as Biggles and Algy or as [[Film/TopGun Maverick and Iceman]].Also this line from Hammond near the end of the race: --> '''Hammond''': He's got a Bugatti, we've got a bus.
27th Jan '16 5:58:51 AM LamborghiniRacer640
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**After May was taken to hospital,Clarkson and Hammond continue to press on driving in the rocky desert. Then the camera pans out to show huge ancient ruins. When the camera returns to Clarkson and Hammond, you'd think they're gonna comment on it until.... --->'''Clarkson:''' Hammond?\\ '''Hammond:'''Yep?\\ '''Clarkson:'''You know what that is, don't you? [Beat] '''ITS A ROAD!'''\\
16th Jan '16 5:00:18 PM AgentTasmania
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** Jeremy driving James' Rolls Royce Phantom, and how you can tell it's James':
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** Jeremy driving James' Rolls Royce Phantom, Corniche, and how you can tell it's James':
15th Jan '16 10:07:04 AM GF93
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-->'''Hammond:''' No, we can't go ''anywhere'' because you've[[spoiler: EXPLODED THE CAR!]]
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-->'''Hammond:''' No, we can't go ''anywhere'' because you've[[spoiler: EXPLODED ''anywhere''- -->'''Clarkson:''' Exactly! -->'''Hammond:''' -because you've '''[[spoiler:EXPLODED THE CAR!]]CAR!]]'''
15th Jan '16 10:05:01 AM GF93
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-->'''Clarkson:''' What? -->'''Hammond:''' Well, it's ''ruined!'' -->'''Clarkson:''' Yes, but it can't go on the motorway going the wrong way! -->'''Hammond:''' No, we can't go ''anywhere'' because you've[[spoiler: EXPLODED THE CAR!]] -->'''Clarkson:''' ''We're'' alive, everyone on the Motorway is alive, this is the best solution ever! -->'''Hammond:''' [[BringMyBrownPants I've wet myself again!]]
15th Jan '16 9:59:47 AM GF93
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** And Jeremy's solution to the problem of elderly drivers going the wrong way on a motorway; Rig their cars to blow up if they turn into the wrong lane.
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** And Jeremy's solution to the problem of elderly drivers going the wrong way on a motorway; set up an alarm to warn them when they're going the wrong way. And if that doesn't work? [[spoiler: Rig their cars to blow up if they turn into continue going down the wrong lane.lane]]. Made even better by Clarkson and Hammond's reactions to it- -->'''Clarkson:''' [[[DissonantSerenity With a big smile on his face]]] There you go! -->'''Hammond:''' [Visibly terrified] YOU ''IDIOT!''
14th Jan '16 6:51:07 PM DoppleDelta
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* When [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gjcwn7T-oMo Richard Hammond is hypnotized]] into forgetting how to drive a car, and then thinking a small pedal car is a brand new car he recently bought.
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* When [[http://www.[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gjcwn7T-oMo com/watch?v=1s0MMEGQUZ4 Richard Hammond is hypnotized]] into forgetting how to drive a car, and then thinking a small pedal car is a brand new car he recently bought.
5th Dec '15 4:36:13 AM RavenBlack
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** While reviewing a Range Rover, Jeremy turns the demonstration into a snuff film when he GOES AFTER THE CAMERA CREW. There's then a screen card that says something to the effect of "Due to Compliance issues with the BBC it is now illegal to involve camera crews in stunts".
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** * While reviewing a Range Rover, Rover during episode 4, Jeremy turns the demonstration into a snuff film when he GOES AFTER THE CAMERA CREW. There's then a screen card that says something to the effect of "Due to Compliance issues with the BBC it is now illegal to involve camera crews in stunts".
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