History Funny / TheThreeMusketeers

* ''Funny/{{The Three Musketeers|1993}}''

[[AC:Western Animation]]

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* Funny/TheThreeMusketeers1993

-->Porthos: "But this is the man I am going to fight!"
-->D'Artagnan: "But not until one o'clock",
-->Aramis: "But this is the man I am going to fight!:
-->D'Artagnan: "But not until two o'clock."
Athos betrays understandable curiousity as to how D'Artagnan has offended his friends. Both Porthos and Aramis lie and the quick witted D'Artagnan backs them up. The long sequence ends with D'Artagnan offering his apologies to Porthos and Aramis - since Athos has the right to kill him first - then drawing his sword with a flourish, "And so, gentlemen, my apologies and ''en garde''!'

* D'Artagnan's formal introduction to the Three Musketeers. On his very first day in Paris he has managed to offend and make an appointment of honor with all three of them. Athos is first up and naturally he has invited the other two to be his seconds. The ensuing scene is totally hilarious. D'Artagnan's dry "your friendship is not founded upon contrasts", "But this is the man I am going to fight!" "But not until one o'clock", and ending with d'Artagnan drawing his sword with a flourish on all three and saying "And so, gentlemen, my apologies and ''en garde''!'

--> After being told not to mention the name Mordaunt in front of the English soldiers: "But why? I'm speaking French and they're English." D'Artagnan just stares at him.

--> Doesn't it bring a tear to your eye, Porthos?\\

* D'Artagnan's formal introduction to the Three Musketeers. On his very first day in Paris he has managed to offend and make an appointment of honor with all three of them. Athos is first up and naturally he has invited the other two to be his seconds. The ensuing scene is totally hilarious from D'Artagnan's dry 'your friendship is not founded upon contrasts.' To; 'But this is the man I am going to fight!' 'But not until One.' To D'Artagnan drawing his sword with a flourish on all three; 'And so, gentlemen, my apologies and en-garde!'

* Mousqueton's story about his father the highwayman is darkly funny. During the war between the Huguenots and the Catholics, Mousqueton's father practiced both religions--when he saw a Catholic walking down the road, he would be filled with protestant zeal and rob the man. When he saw a Huguenot, he'd suddenly be overcome with such faith in the Roman Catholic church that he would be compelled to attack the Huguenot. This continued for some time, until both a Catholic and a Huguenot he'd robbed before came upon him at the same time, put aside their religious difference, and hanged him from a tree. They then boasted about this in a tavern, and were overheard by Mousqueton and his brother--and their father, in his great foresight, raised Mousqueton Catholic and his brother Huguenot, so that after they left the tavern, each brother followed one of the men who hung their father and paid their dues.

* The theological discussion just might be the funniest part of the whole book. Which is saying something.

* Athos and Grimaud in a wine cellar...for two weeks. Enough said.

* Athos in the wine cellar. Enough said.

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* In the 1993 Disney adaptation, at the end of the movie, D'Artagnan has just been made a Musketeer and is talking to the title trio about what comes next for them, when Girard and his brothers, who were pursuing D'Artagnan earlier in the movie, spot him.
-->'''D'Artagnan''': So what do we do now? What's next?
-->'''Porthos''': Well, we protect the King.
-->'''Aramis''': Protect the Queen.
-->'''Porthos''': In the name of God. And France, correct?
-->'''Aramis''': France indeed.
-->[Girard and his brothers have caught up with D'Artagnan. At the other end of the street they draw swords]
-->'''Girard''': D'Artagnan! My sister's honor will not wait a moment longer.
-->'''D'Artagnan''': I'll handle this.
-->'''Porthos''': D'Artagnan, we also protect each other.
-->'''D'Artagnan''': All for one.
-->'''Aramis, Porthos, Atho''''s: And one for all.
-->[Girard's eyes widen]
-->'''Girard''': RUN!
-->The movie ends with Girard and brothers fleeing as the entire Musketeer corps chases them, with an overhead shot of a steady stream of blue tunics down the street.
* From the same version:
-->'''Athos''': Your manners have not improved yet. You're late.
-->'''D'Artagnan''': You in a hurry to die?
-->'''Athos''': [Porthos and Aramis arrive] Here come the grave diggers now.
-->'''Porthos''': Athos, you cannot fight this boy.
-->'''Athos''': Why not?
-->'''Porthos''': I'm fighting him.
-->'''D'Artagnan''': Not until 1 o'clock.
-->'''Aramis''': I have a duel with him too.
-->'''D'Artagnan''': Not until 2 o'clock.