History Funny / TheAndyGriffithShow

15th Nov '16 9:03:43 AM BobTanaka
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-->'''Barney:''' "A lot of people lie at lunch; what of it?!"

to:

-->'''Barney:''' "A lot of people lie at lunch; what of it?!"it?!"
* When Barney is shocked to learn Helen plans to keep teaching after she marries:
-->'''Andy:''' "A lot of women do that, Barney; this is the twentieth century."
-->'''Barney:''' (stiffly) "I know what century it is."
13th Nov '16 11:57:10 AM BobTanaka
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-->'''Barney:''' "A lot of people lie at lunch; what of it!?"

to:

-->'''Barney:''' "A lot of people lie at lunch; what of it!?"it?!"
13th Nov '16 11:56:52 AM BobTanaka
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* In one episode Barney buys an army surplus motorcycle and proceeds to wreak havoc on the town. Andy finally convinces him to give it up. Then, at the end of the episode, he gets the news that Barney has gone to another army surplus auction. Cut to Andy pulling over an ''armored personnel carrier.'' [[spoiler: Except it wasn't Barney this time. Cue Andy having to explain to an irate Army Officer why he thought his deputy might be driving a tank.]]

to:

* In one episode Barney buys an army surplus motorcycle and proceeds to wreak havoc on the town. Andy finally convinces him to give it up. Then, at the end of the episode, he gets the news that Barney has gone to another army surplus auction. Cut to Andy pulling over an ''armored personnel carrier.'' [[spoiler: Except it wasn't Barney this time. Cue Andy having to explain to an irate Army Officer why he thought his deputy might be driving a tank.]]]]
* In one episode Barney thinks Andy and Helen are engaged and has arranged a big surprise party with Aunt Bea for them. In order to get them there at the right moment, Barney and Thelma Lou invite them out to dinner and keep making up increasingly flimsy excuses to delay them until the right time:
-->'''Thelma Lou:''' "I don't like spaghetti."
-->'''Helen:''' "Thelma Lou, we had spaghetti for lunch last week and you told me you loved it!"
-->'''Barney:''' "A lot of people lie at lunch; what of it!?"
12th Apr '16 7:12:43 PM BobTanaka
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-->'''Groom:''' "...Seems to me there's something wrong about the way you put that."

to:

-->'''Groom:''' "...Seems to me there's something wrong about the way you put that.""
* In one episode Barney buys an army surplus motorcycle and proceeds to wreak havoc on the town. Andy finally convinces him to give it up. Then, at the end of the episode, he gets the news that Barney has gone to another army surplus auction. Cut to Andy pulling over an ''armored personnel carrier.'' [[spoiler: Except it wasn't Barney this time. Cue Andy having to explain to an irate Army Officer why he thought his deputy might be driving a tank.]]
3rd Apr '16 3:33:42 PM BobTanaka
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-->'''Andy:''' "You can't send Wilbur off on a honeymoon by himself. That'd be like putting a pig in a sty and taking the mud out."

to:

-->'''Andy:''' "You can't send Wilbur off on a honeymoon by himself. That'd be like putting a pig in a sty and taking away the mud out.mud."
3rd Apr '16 3:19:57 PM BobTanaka
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-->'''Buzzard 1''': You just stop the blabbering, sheriff, and get on with the marrying.

to:

-->'''Buzzard 1''': You just stop the blabbering, sheriff, and get on with the marrying.marrying.
* In the first scene of the very first episode, we get this gem. Andy (serving as Justice of the Peace) is marrying his housekeeper to her sweetheart. When Opie (who doesn't want her to go) starts making a scene, she offers to stay behind for a few days.
-->'''Andy:''' "You can't send Wilbur off on a honeymoon by himself. That'd be like putting a pig in a sty and taking the mud out."
-->'''Groom:''' "...Seems to me there's something wrong about the way you put that."
9th Dec '15 8:30:59 PM Lightning4119
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* "[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mY_PEcfx0CU Now here at The Rock, we have two basic rules....]]"

to:

* "[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mY_PEcfx0CU Now here at The Rock, we have two basic rules....]]"]]"
* Andy breaks up a Hatfields and [=McCoys=] (or Montague and Capulet, considering that their kids want to get married) style feud by pretending to arrange a duel between the two crusty old guys. Neither one of them wants to actually shoot the other, and when Andy fires a shot into the air both of them run for it. He gets them together later, pointing out that their kids don't care what their parents think, they love each other.
-->'''Andy''': Why, you mix these two fine bloods together here and you two old buzzards are liable to get yourselves a grandson that can't be nothing in this world but a natural born hero! Why, yes sir! Why, you let these two young'uns ''[stops as both men point their shotguns at him]'' '''Now''' what is it.
-->'''Buzzard 1''': You just stop the blabbering, sheriff, and get on with the marrying.
31st Aug '14 8:34:21 AM Jeduthun
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* Andy goes out of town on business for a day, leaving Barney in charge. When he gets back, Barney has about half the town locked up, including the Mayor, Aunt Bea, and ''Opie!''

to:

* Andy goes out of town on business for a day, leaving Barney in charge. When he gets back, Barney has about half the town locked up, including the Mayor, Aunt Bea, and ''Opie!''''Opie!''
* "[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mY_PEcfx0CU Now here at The Rock, we have two basic rules....]]"
13th Jan '13 8:09:18 PM KamenRiderOokalf
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--> '''Andy:''' "Now, you understand why we're doing this, don't you?"
--> '''Opie:''' "Uh huh; because we don't wanna hurt Aunt Bea's feelings, and you don't want me to get sick again."

to:

--> ---> '''Andy:''' "Now, you understand why we're doing this, don't you?"
--> ---> '''Opie:''' "Uh huh; because we don't wanna hurt Aunt Bea's feelings, and you don't want me to get sick again."
10th Dec '12 4:49:40 PM BobTanaka
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--> '''Opie:''' "Oh, hi Barney."

to:

--> '''Opie:''' "Oh, hi Barney.""
* Andy goes out of town on business for a day, leaving Barney in charge. When he gets back, Barney has about half the town locked up, including the Mayor, Aunt Bea, and ''Opie!''
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http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/article_history.php?article=Funny.TheAndyGriffithShow