History Funny / Temeraire

28th Jul '17 1:15:31 PM RealSlimShadowen
Is there an issue? Send a Message


'''Temeraire''': "I am merely curious now, if that is all there is in Dover. For Roland is too young for whores, is she not?"[[note]]Emily Roland is, at this point in the series, ''ten''.[[/note]]\\

to:

'''Temeraire''': "I am merely curious now, if that is all there is in Dover. For Roland is too young for whores, is she not?"[[note]]Emily Roland is, at this point in the series, ''ten''.a ''ten-year-old girl''.[[/note]]\\



** Not to mention when Temeraire confesses this to Lawrence...who then ''cracks up laughing'', much to Temeraire's indignation.

to:

** Not to mention when Temeraire confesses this to Lawrence...Lawrence in Throne Of Jade...who then ''cracks up laughing'', much to Temeraire's indignation.



* When Harcourt confesses to being pregnant, Laurence rather dramatically contemplates how all the dragon-captains will be suspect as the father in this dreadful situation, and how there is nothing to possibly be done but endure "the curiosity of the world"...whereupon Berkley casually asks who the father is, and Harcourt just as casually answers.

to:

* When Harcourt confesses to being pregnant, Laurence rather dramatically contemplates how all the dragon-captains will be suspect as the father in this dreadful situation, and situation--indeed he finds himself performing the mental calculus, trying to puzzle out which of the captains it was--and how there is nothing to possibly be done but endure "the curiosity of the world"...whereupon Berkley casually asks who the father is, and Harcourt just as casually answers.



* Jane Roland's letters. Especially where she explains differences that came with her new rank; and notes that if, due to accident or ungovernable impulse, something terminal should ''hypothetically'' happen to Rankin... Lawrence has already been banished to a remote penal colony the better part of a year's travel from Britain.

to:

* Jane Roland's letters. Especially where she explains differences that came with her new rank; and notes that if, due to accident or ungovernable impulse, something terminal should ''hypothetically'' happen to Rankin... Lawrence well, Laurence has already been banished to a remote penal colony the better part of a year's travel from Britain.Britain, so if nothing else he probably wouldn't be able to be properly sentenced for a good eighteen months.



* During an argument concerning the possibility of marriage, Laurence finally nerves himself up enough to ask if Emily Roland is [[IsThatCuteKidYours his daughter]] (with the non-so-subtle implication that he must wed her mother). Temeraire promptly reassures him that she is not, pointing out quite logically that he did not start sleeping with Jane Roland until Emily was in her eleventh year and it simply did not work that way.

to:

* During an argument concerning the possibility of marriage, Laurence finally nerves himself up enough to ask if Emily Roland is [[IsThatCuteKidYours his daughter]] (with the non-so-subtle implication that he must wed her mother). Temeraire promptly reassures him that she is not, pointing out quite logically that he did not start sleeping with Jane Roland until Emily was in her eleventh year and it simply did not work (it's implied earlier in the series that way.dragons don't entirely understand human reproduction, but they know that humans can't have children ''before'' becoming lovers).



* No one was ready for Ning, Temeraire's and Iskierka's offspring, as not only does she have a combination of Temeraire's divine wind and Iskierka's fire (but in the form of a white bolt that explodes on contact), but she seems to have a combination of her progenitors' personalities. Laurence is almost sorry to foist her onto Prince Mianning ''should she choose him''.
* The entire episode of Laurence's "discreet" countryside recovery after a duel gone awry. There is nothing like the sight of men of all ages trying to win a young maiden's hand (through her mother's critical approval), going so far as to spark a clan war of sorts between Churki and Temeraire over whose human was more deserving of a wife--much to Laurence's and Hammond's disdain.
* Lieutenant Challoner leads a BoardingParty to capture one of the Inca dragons. It turns out later that the dragon took a [[DefeatMeansFriendship liking to her]] and wants to [[ThisIsMyHuman keep her]]. Since the Inca dragon is willing to sign up with the Aerial Corp everyone apparently decided to roll with it and appointed Challoner as the dragon's captain.

to:

* No one was ready for Ning, Temeraire's and Iskierka's offspring, as not only does she have a combination of Temeraire's divine wind and Iskierka's fire (but in (in the form of a white bolt that explodes on contact), contact, not unlike [[Movie/HowToTrainYourDragon a Night Fury's breath weapon]]), but she seems to have a combination of her progenitors' personalities.personalities (being both self-centered and impulsive yet analytical and farsighted with a developed if somewhat inhuman moral ode). Laurence is almost sorry to foist her onto Prince Mianning ''should she choose him''.
* The entire episode of Laurence's "discreet" countryside recovery after a duel gone awry. There is nothing like the sight of men of all ages trying to win a young maiden's hand (through her mother's critical yet hopeful approval), going so far as to spark a clan war of sorts between Churki and Temeraire over whose human was more deserving of a wife--much to Laurence's and Hammond's disdain.
* Lieutenant Challoner leads a BoardingParty to capture one of the Inca dragons. It turns out later that the dragon took a [[DefeatMeansFriendship liking to her]] and wants to [[ThisIsMyHuman keep her]]. Since the Inca dragon is perfectly willing to sign up with the Aerial Corp Corps if allowed, everyone apparently decided to roll with it and appointed Challoner as the Incan dragon's captain.captain in the ''British'' air force.
22nd Oct '16 7:28:01 AM H.TorranceGriffin
Is there an issue? Send a Message

Added DiffLines:

** Hearing this, Lawrence finds himself torn between outrage at the insult offered the young woman and [[ShareTheMalePain visceral horror at that woman's response]].


Added DiffLines:

* Captain Riley's discovery of Emily Roland's gender forces Lawrence to explain the [[TheSquadette Longwing handling requirements]], which becomes a discussion about (and attempt to explain to Temeraire) the general taboo concerning (human) women serving in the military, leading to....
-->'''Lawrence''': "It is different for dragons than for people. Among other things, women must bear children, and care for them through childhood, where your kind lay eggs and hatch ready to look to your own needs."
--> '''Temeraire''': (surprised and facinated) "You do not hatch out of eggs? How then–"
--> '''Riley''': "I beg your pardon, I think I see Purbeck looking for me." (unceremoniously flees the dragon-deck, to Lawrence's resentment)
30th Aug '16 6:47:30 PM ArixOdragc
Is there an issue? Send a Message

Added DiffLines:

* Iskierka, still being her usual self even in written form:
-->We will certainly manage it (getting the French army out of Spain) in the spring, even if everyone is lazing in winter quarters at present. I do not suppose you will have got them out of Germany by then, however. It is a great pity you have let Napoleon get away.
--> -ISKIERKA
-->PS: The Spanish fire-breathers are much smaller than I am.
2nd Aug '16 8:46:21 PM Adeon
Is there an issue? Send a Message

Added DiffLines:

* Lieutenant Challoner leads a BoardingParty to capture one of the Inca dragons. It turns out later that the dragon took a [[DefeatMeansFriendship liking to her]] and wants to [[ThisIsMyHuman keep her]]. Since the Inca dragon is willing to sign up with the Aerial Corp everyone apparently decided to roll with it and appointed Challoner as the dragon's captain.
31st Jul '16 4:19:57 PM GothicProphet
Is there an issue? Send a Message


[[foldercontrol]]



!!His Majesty's Dragon

to:

!!His [[folder: His Majesty's DragonDragon]]



'''Temeraire''': "I am merely curious now, if that is all there is in Dover. For Roland is too young for whores, is she not?"[[note]]Emily Roland is, at this point in the series, ''ten''[[/note]]\\

to:

'''Temeraire''': "I am merely curious now, if that is all there is in Dover. For Roland is too young for whores, is she not?"[[note]]Emily Roland is, at this point in the series, ''ten''[[/note]]\\''ten''.[[/note]]\\




* Catherine Harcourt reflects on the one time she suffered sexual harassment:

to:

\n* Catherine Harcourt reflects on the one time she suffered sexual harassment:harassment.




!!Throne of Jade

to:

\n!!Throne [[/folder]]

[[folder: Throne
of JadeJade]]



-->'''Temeraire''': ''<resentfully>'' "I do not care if they do not like me, maybe then they will let me alone, and I will not have to stay in China." ''<visibly perking up>'' "If I were very offensive, do you suppose they would go away now? Lawrence, what would be particularly insulting?"

!!Black Powder War

to:

-->'''Temeraire''': ''<resentfully>'' ''[resentfully]'' "I do not care if they do not like me, maybe then they will let me alone, and I will not have to stay in China." ''<visibly ''[visibly perking up>'' up]'' "If I were very offensive, do you suppose they would go away now? Lawrence, what would be particularly insulting?"

!!Black
insulting?"
[[/folder]]

[[folder: Black
Powder WarWar]]



* The first few hours of Iskierka's life. Suffice to say that she's a hyperaggressive BrattyHalfPint who ''can breathe fire''.

to:

* The first few hours of Iskierka's life. Suffice to say that she's a hyperaggressive hyper-aggressive BrattyHalfPint who ''can breathe fire''.



** when they are attacked by enemy dragons, Iskierka excitedly tries to attack them, delete being all of a few hours old. Temeraire has to physically carry her away to prevent her from fighting.

!!Empire of Ivory

to:

** when When they are attacked by enemy dragons, Iskierka excitedly tries to attack them, delete despite being all of a few hours old. Temeraire has to physically carry her away to prevent her from fighting. \n\n!!Empire
[[/folder]]

[[folder: Empire
of IvoryIvory]]




!!Victory of Eagles

to:

\n!!Victory [[/folder]]

[[folder: Victory
of EaglesEagles]]




!!Tongues of Serpents

to:

\n!!Tongues [[/folder]]

[[folder: Tongues
of SerpentsSerpents]]




!!Crucible of Gold

to:

\n!!Crucible [[/folder]]

[[folder: Crucible
of GoldGold]]



"I was not hinting--" But Temeraire shook out his ruff, and hastily said, "--oh, never mind; very well,"

!!Blood of Tyrants
* Laurence is lost during a bad storm, and washes ashore Japan with amnesia. He doesn't remember anything of his time with Temeraire, or being an aviator. This of course leads to hilarity. Upon Temeraire finally finding him this exchange takes place.

to:

"I was not hinting--" But Temeraire shook out his ruff, and hastily said, "--oh, never mind; very well,"

!!Blood
well."
[[/folder]]

[[folder: Blood
of Tyrants
Tyrants]]
* Laurence is lost during a bad storm, and washes ashore Japan with amnesia. He doesn't remember anything of his time with Temeraire, or being an aviator. This of course leads to hilarity. Upon Temeraire finally finding him him, this exchange takes place.



* Temeraire invites Lung Qin Mei to attend dinner with him and the other dragons - partly because he wants to see her, but also because he's been asked to sire a new Celestial companion for the Crown Prince. However, things go from bad to worse; first Iskierka jealous at her own egg with Temeraire being passed over insults Mei and leaves, next Temeraire becomes humiliated by the lack of manners of his companions, who abruptly leave so that Temeraire can arrange affairs with Mei. Finally, once they've left, Mei reveals she's been learning English to talk with him, and as such, understood everything that was said during the dinner. Becomes a CrowningMomentOfHeartwarming shortly afterwards though, as the two are more happy to see each other than anything else.

to:

* Temeraire invites Lung Qin Mei to attend dinner with him and the other dragons - partly because he wants to see her, but also because he's been asked to sire a new Celestial companion for the Crown Prince. However, things go from bad to worse; first Iskierka Iskierka, jealous at her own egg with Temeraire being passed over over, insults Mei and leaves, next Temeraire becomes humiliated by the lack of manners of his companions, who abruptly leave so that Temeraire can arrange affairs with Mei. Finally, once they've left, Mei reveals she's been learning English to talk with him, and as such, understood everything that was said during the dinner. Becomes a CrowningMomentOfHeartwarming shortly afterwards though, as the two are more happy to see each other than anything else.



* During an argument concerning the possibility of marriage, Lawrence finally nerves himself up enough to ask if Emily Roland is [[IsThatCuteKidYours his daughter]] (with the non-so-subtle implication that he must wed her mother). Temeraire promptly reassures him that she is not, pointing out quite logically that he did not start sleeping with Jane Roland until Emily was in her eleventh year and it simply did not work that way.

to:

* During an argument concerning the possibility of marriage, Lawrence Laurence finally nerves himself up enough to ask if Emily Roland is [[IsThatCuteKidYours his daughter]] (with the non-so-subtle implication that he must wed her mother). Temeraire promptly reassures him that she is not, pointing out quite logically that he did not start sleeping with Jane Roland until Emily was in her eleventh year and it simply did not work that way.




!!League of Dragons

to:

\n!!League [[/folder]]

[[folder: League
of DragonsDragons]]


Added DiffLines:

[[/folder]]
8th Jul '16 10:53:55 PM TheStrayXIII
Is there an issue? Send a Message

Added DiffLines:


!!League of Dragons
* No one was ready for Ning, Temeraire's and Iskierka's offspring, as not only does she have a combination of Temeraire's divine wind and Iskierka's fire (but in the form of a white bolt that explodes on contact), but she seems to have a combination of her progenitors' personalities. Laurence is almost sorry to foist her onto Prince Mianning ''should she choose him''.
* The entire episode of Laurence's "discreet" countryside recovery after a duel gone awry. There is nothing like the sight of men of all ages trying to win a young maiden's hand (through her mother's critical approval), going so far as to spark a clan war of sorts between Churki and Temeraire over whose human was more deserving of a wife--much to Laurence's and Hammond's disdain.
19th Feb '16 8:55:57 PM LBHills
Is there an issue? Send a Message


--> '''Berkly:''' Christ above, Harcourt, if I ever have reason to offend you, I will make damned sure you have nothing hot at hand.

to:

--> '''Berkly:''' '''Berkley:''' Christ above, Harcourt, if I ever have reason to offend you, I will make damned sure you have nothing hot at hand.
6th Jan '16 11:14:05 PM LBHills
Is there an issue? Send a Message

Added DiffLines:

* Catherine Harcourt reflects on the one time she suffered sexual harassment:
--> '''Harcourt:''' ...when I was sixteen... a dreadful fellow sat next to me and whispered impolite remarks until I poured a pot of coffee into his lap... he went away straight after.
--> '''Berkly:''' Christ above, Harcourt, if I ever have reason to offend you, I will make damned sure you have nothing hot at hand.
--> '''Harcourt:''' Well, I would have struck him, but I would have had to get up.
16th Dec '15 10:42:41 AM kankai
Is there an issue? Send a Message



to:

** when they are attacked by enemy dragons, Iskierka excitedly tries to attack them, delete being all of a few hours old. Temeraire has to physically carry her away to prevent her from fighting.
10th Sep '15 4:19:48 PM 9_miho
Is there an issue? Send a Message

Added DiffLines:

** Recall that many in the Corps can be born, grow up, and die without EVER being considered for their own dragon. Seeing Granby's carefully constructed dream fall apart in the face of Iskierka is delicious, delicious schadenfreude.
This list shows the last 10 events of 58. Show all.
http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/article_history.php?article=Funny.Temeraire