History Funny / StarControl

10th May '16 9:10:58 PM Teakay
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'''Chmmr:''' NO.

to:

'''Chmmr:''' NO.NO.
* The Zoq-Fot-Pik's frantic call for help is not all that funny ("Worse than Zebranky" aside). Hayes reading "HELP! HELP!" completely deadpan, however...
9th May '16 4:49:55 PM Teakay
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-->'''Yehat:''' Look at that furred muzzle, those shining black eyes, the sweet claws! Our children have returned from oblivion!

to:

-->'''Yehat:''' Look at that furred muzzle, those shining black eyes, the sweet claws! Our children have returned from oblivion!oblivion!
* Discussing your battle plan with the Chmmr.
-->'''Captain:''' We'll fire this weapon at the Sa-Matra, right? It's not going to hurt my ship, is it?\\
'''Chmmr:''' YOUR VESSEL WILL BE TOTALLY ANNIHILATED.\\
'''Captain:''' Whoa. Gee, that's bad. I don't suppose there's anything we can do to change that, is there?\\
'''Chmmr:''' NO.
30th Apr '16 7:23:00 PM Teakay
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Added DiffLines:

** He also makes numerous demands for his comfort, like changing out the Mozart and Iggy Pop on loop in the hold, thermal blankets and pillows, fresh meat and vegetables, and [[BreadEggsMilkSquick crew members to play with]].
30th Apr '16 7:19:09 PM Teakay
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Added DiffLines:

** If you declare your intention to attack their scouts:
-->'''Pik:''' ''[to the Zoq]'' So what does all your nicey-nice to the alien get us? Nothing! That's what! You should have done what I said and told him we were the Precursors!
25th Apr '16 7:36:33 PM Teakay
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-->''(less than a minute later)''



** The game also allows you to impersonate their gods, and while there is a serious use for this ability, it also allows you to mess around with them, like making them rename their species the "Dill-rats" or replace the word "you" with "yuubuu". The resulting quotes are a laugh riot.

to:

** The game also allows you to impersonate their gods, and while there is a serious use for this ability, it also allows you to mess around with them, like making them rename their species the "Dill-rats" or replace the word "you" with "yuubuu". The resulting quotes are a laugh riot. It's too bad they don't stack.
22nd Apr '16 8:56:15 AM Teakay
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-->'''Captain''': But `evil' is that which is morally bad or wrong. And if your actions are judged by your society as correct, aren't you, in fact, good?

to:

-->'''Captain:''' Do you really consider yourselves Evil?
-->'''Ilwrath:''' Ha! Evil! Of Course We're Evil! Dogar And Kazon Would Never Reward A Less-Than-Hideously Evil Species With Their Baleful Grace. Why We Are The Very Definition Of Evil! Everything About Us, Within And Without, Reeks Of Heinous Deeds, Deceit And Treachery! [[ArsonMurderAndJaywalking Even Our House Pets Are Rather Evil]].
-->'''Captain''': But `evil' 'evil' is that which is morally bad or wrong. And if your actions are judged by your society as correct, aren't you, in fact, good?



** On occasion, when you go to speak with him, he'll also share with you some interesting tidbits about the thoughts of your crew, including which female crewmembers have a crush on you.

to:

** On occasion, when you go to speak with him, he'll also share with you some interesting tidbits about the thoughts of your crew, including which female crewmembers have a crush on you.you.
* Combined with CrowningMomentOfHeartwarming and TearJerker: The Yehat ''[[CutenessProximity gush]]'' over the young Shofixti you send them like a proud parent over a baby.
-->'''Yehat:''' Look at that furred muzzle, those shining black eyes, the sweet claws! Our children have returned from oblivion!
24th Dec '15 6:06:26 PM Dehumanizer
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--->'''Safe One''': If you held a weapon to Fwiffo's head, he would say anything you wanted him to say.
In fact, if you held a vegetable to his head, he would probably say anything you wanted him to say.

to:

--->'''Safe One''': If you held a weapon to Fwiffo's head, he would say anything you wanted him to say.
say. In fact, if you held a vegetable to his head, he would probably say anything you wanted him to say.
24th Dec '15 6:06:07 PM Dehumanizer
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--->'''Safe One''': If you held a gun to Fwiffo's head, he'd say anything you wanted him to. In fact, if you held a vegetable to Fwiffo's head, he'd probably still say anything you wanted him to.

to:

--->'''Safe One''': If you held a gun weapon to Fwiffo's head, he'd he would say anything you wanted him to. to say.
In fact, if you held a vegetable to Fwiffo's his head, he'd he would probably still say anything you wanted him to.to say.
2nd Dec '15 6:47:05 PM AFP
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** When you confront him with the Taalo shield and defeat the death squad of Umgah he sends after you, he weaves a hilariously fake story about how the fight somehow knocked the evil out of him and conveniently removed his psychic powers, which he claims he didn't even want, so there's no need to pursue him or even keep the mental shield up. The Captain doesn't even bother to say anything, but just glares at him.

to:

** When you confront him with the Taalo shield and defeat the death squad of Umgah he sends after you, he weaves a hilariously fake story about how the fight somehow knocked the evil out of him and conveniently removed his psychic powers, which he claims he didn't even want, so there's no need to pursue him or even keep the mental shield up. The Captain doesn't even bother to say anything, but just glares at him.him.
** On occasion, when you go to speak with him, he'll also share with you some interesting tidbits about the thoughts of your crew, including which female crewmembers have a crush on you.
21st May '15 3:18:08 PM KnownUnknown
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* The Dnyarri are TheDreaded, and rightfully so, but they do have their moments.

to:

* The Dnyarri are TheDreaded, and rightfully so, but they do have their moments. The one you meet is very gruff and sarcastic and talks like a con man, leading to some hilarious moments.



--->'''Dnyarri''': Alright, I'm sure you're busy with plenty of things. Goodbye!

to:

--->'''Dnyarri''': Alright, I'm sure you're busy with plenty of things. Goodbye!Goodbye!
** When you confront him with the Taalo shield and defeat the death squad of Umgah he sends after you, he weaves a hilariously fake story about how the fight somehow knocked the evil out of him and conveniently removed his psychic powers, which he claims he didn't even want, so there's no need to pursue him or even keep the mental shield up. The Captain doesn't even bother to say anything, but just glares at him.
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http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/article_history.php?article=Funny.StarControl