History Funny / QI

25th Feb '17 8:35:16 PM DrSlide
Is there an issue? Send a Message

Added DiffLines:

***The audience lost 10 points for that answer and still came in ahead of Alan, who finished at -25.
22nd Feb '17 7:14:31 PM gewunomox
Is there an issue? Send a Message


** This exchange between Stephen and Danny Bhoy regarding [[{{Creator/JohnLennon}} John Lennon]]...

to:

** This exchange between Stephen and Danny Bhoy regarding [[{{Creator/JohnLennon}} John Lennon]]...Music/JohnLennon...
13th Feb '17 4:10:15 PM MovieNut14
Is there an issue? Send a Message


-->'''Phil Jupitus''': So we're doing middle class Cockney rhyming slang?

to:

-->'''Phil -->'''Phill Jupitus''': So we're doing middle class Cockney rhyming slang?



-->'''Phill''': Ferns, they make a canny noise like. [later to Stephen] Never ever go to Newcastle!

to:

-->'''Phill''': --->'''Phill''': Ferns, they make a canny noise like. [later to Stephen] Never ever go to Newcastle!



-->'''Phil Jupitus''': And yet, he looks like a lovely fellow.

to:

-->'''Phil -->'''Phill Jupitus''': And yet, he looks like a lovely fellow.



-->'''Phil Jupitus''': Destroying the ozone layer.

to:

-->'''Phil -->'''Phill Jupitus''': Destroying the ozone layer.



-->'''Phil Jupitus''': Then he decided to cut out the middle-man, and just kill babies with hammers!

to:

-->'''Phil -->'''Phill Jupitus''': Then he decided to cut out the middle-man, and just kill babies with hammers!



-->'''Phil Jupitus''': [[PrecisionFStrike Well, fucking good!]]

to:

-->'''Phil -->'''Phill Jupitus''': [[PrecisionFStrike Well, fucking good!]]



-->'''Rory Bremner''': Do you know what was number 1?
-->'''Phil Jupitus''': ''[in an exaggerated posh accent]'' People, public people, the working classes. Poorly groomed servants, ill-bred ponies. That Blair fellow.
-->'''Stephen Fry''': If I find out you've been intercepting my mail.

to:

-->'''Rory Bremner''': Do you know what was number 1?
-->'''Phil
1?\\
'''Phill
Jupitus''': ''[in an exaggerated posh accent]'' People, public people, the working classes. Poorly groomed servants, ill-bred ponies. That Blair fellow.
-->'''Stephen
fellow.\\
'''Stephen
Fry''': If I find out you've been intercepting my mail.



* From "Eating": "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XC2RYiaM6WU What happens if you eat nothing but rabbit?]]" Especially when ''no one'' lets go of the concept. Stephen's reaction: "You're picking on me, I won't have it!"

to:

* From "Eating": "[[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XC2RYiaM6WU What happens if you eat nothing but rabbit?]]" Especially when ''no one'' (read: Jimmy) lets go of the concept. Stephen's reaction: "You're picking on me, I won't have it!"



-->'''Stephen''': When did rabbits arrive in Britain?\\

to:

-->'''Stephen''': --->'''Stephen''': When did rabbits arrive in Britain?\\



-->'''Stephen''': But the extraordinary thing about the introduction of rabbits into Britain was that they were kept in these warrens which were run by--\\

to:

-->'''Stephen''': ---->'''Stephen''': But the extraordinary thing about the introduction of rabbits into Britain was that they were kept in these warrens which were run by--\\



** The question about what cornflakes were originally used for, and Johnny Vegas's joke response;
--> '''Johnny:''' It was for, er, putting in mattresses, for monks, as, er, an anti-masturbation sound trigger device.\\

to:

** The question about what cornflakes were originally used for, and Johnny Vegas's joke response;
--> '''Johnny:'''
response:
--->'''Johnny:'''
It was for, er, putting in mattresses, for monks, as, er, an anti-masturbation sound trigger device.\\



--> '''Dara:''' Ethiopia?
-->'''Stephen:''' Yes.
--> '''Alan:''' Haile Selassie?
--> '''Stephen:''' Before Haile Selassie.
--> '''Jimmy and Alan:''' ''([[StrangeMindsThinkAlike at the same time]])'' Lowly Salassie?

to:

--> '''Dara:''' Ethiopia?
-->'''Stephen:''' Yes.
-->
--->'''Dara:''' Ethiopia?\\
'''Stephen:''' Yes.\\
'''Alan:''' Haile Selassie?
-->
Selassie?\\
'''Stephen:''' Before Haile Selassie.
-->
Selassie.\\
'''Jimmy and Alan:''' ''([[StrangeMindsThinkAlike at the same time]])'' Lowly Salassie?



--> '''Alan:''' Is this that one where they got stuck and that guy had to walk for ''ages''?
--> '''Stephen:''' Yes, actually. For about eight months he walked around.
--> '''Jimmy:''' Is it The Island Of Reluctant But Inevitable Homosexuality? I think I recognize it, from a school trip that went ''horribly'' wrong.
--> '''Stephen:''' Lord Of The Undone Flies.

to:

--> '''Alan:''' --->'''Alan:''' Is this that one where they got stuck and that guy had to walk for ''ages''?
-->
''ages''?\\
'''Stephen:''' Yes, actually. For about eight months he walked around.
-->
around.\\
'''Jimmy:''' Is it The Island Of Reluctant But Inevitable Homosexuality? I think I recognize it, from a school trip that went ''horribly'' wrong.
-->
wrong.\\
'''Stephen:''' Lord Of The Undone Flies.



--> '''Phil Jupitus''': I dare say someone just threw his pipe at the television. ''[Upper class accent]'' Fry just called me Belgian! Where's my gun?

to:

--> '''Phil '''Phill Jupitus''': I dare say someone just threw his pipe at the television. ''[Upper ''[upper class accent]'' Fry just called me Belgian! Where's my gun?



--> '''Sean Lock''': You're going bald.

to:

--> ---> '''Sean Lock''': You're going bald.



-->'''Alan:''' Is it true that there's more oestrogen in the water supply at that more and more people are turning gay?\\

to:

-->'''Alan:''' --->'''Alan:''' Is it true that there's more oestrogen in the water supply at that more and more people are turning gay?\\



-->'''David Mitchell:''' So they have no unmounted police?
-->'''Stephen:''' Well, I don't know...
-->'''David:''' 'Cause that must be difficult on raids of, of small flats. ''[mimes hitting his head on a low ceiling]'' "OW! My head!"
-->'''Jimmy Carr:''' You should see the squad cars! They're a ''mess'', David, they are a ''mess.''
-->'''David:''' Imagine trying to chase a heroin addict up a small staircase on a horse, it's ridiculous!
-->'''Alan:''' All the heroin addicts would know to head for the small staircase!
-->'''Stephen:''' Yes, they would!
-->'''David:''' It's like trying to police a country with [[Series/DoctorWho Daleks!]]
-->'''Jimmy:''' Which'd never work with the disabled access we've got now, the Daleks can get everywhere.
-->'''David:''' Yeah, do you think- Jimmy, are you saying that you think that disabled access is a Dalek conspiracy?!

to:

-->'''David Mitchell:''' So they have no unmounted police?
-->'''Stephen:'''
police?\\
'''Stephen:'''
Well, I don't know...
-->'''David:'''
know...\\
'''David:'''
'Cause that must be difficult on raids of, of small flats. ''[mimes hitting his head on a low ceiling]'' "OW! My head!"
-->'''Jimmy
head!"\\
'''Jimmy
Carr:''' You should see the squad cars! They're a ''mess'', David, they are a ''mess.''
-->'''David:'''
''\\
'''David:'''
Imagine trying to chase a heroin addict up a small staircase on a horse, it's ridiculous!
-->'''Alan:'''
ridiculous!\\
'''Alan:'''
All the heroin addicts would know to head for the small staircase!
-->'''Stephen:'''
staircase!\\
'''Stephen:'''
Yes, they would!
-->'''David:'''
would!\\
'''David:'''
It's like trying to police a country with [[Series/DoctorWho Daleks!]]
-->'''Jimmy:'''
Daleks!]]\\
'''Jimmy:'''
Which'd never work with the disabled access we've got now, the Daleks can get everywhere.
-->'''David:'''
everywhere.\\
'''David:'''
Yeah, do you think- Jimmy, are you saying that you think that disabled access is a Dalek conspiracy?!



-->'''Lee Mack''': Yeah, 'cause they thought it was a big fruit machine. 'Look, I won a soldier, Mummy!'"

to:

-->'''Lee Mack''': Yeah, 'cause they thought it was a big fruit machine. 'Look, "Look, I won a soldier, Mummy!'"Mummy!"



-->"That's dinner sorted."

to:

-->"That's dinner sorted.-->"Well. Dinner's sorted..."



-->'''Jack:''' Oh, God!...

to:

-->'''Jack:''' Oh, God!...God...



-->'''Phil:''' After fourteen years, he understands the format.
** Phil also suspects that the reason Alan did well (enough to win) was that he wasn't scared of Sandi the way he was of Stephen.
--->'''Phil''': I'll throw him off his game: [[Series/{{Blackadder}} baah, baah]]!

to:

-->'''Phil:''' -->'''Phill:''' After fourteen years, he understands the format.
** Phil Phill also suspects that the reason Alan did well (enough to win) was that he wasn't scared of Sandi the way he was of Stephen.
--->'''Phil''': --->'''Phill''': I'll throw him off his game: [[Series/{{Blackadder}} baah, baah]]!



-->'''Josh:''' I love the idea that someone has turned on this for the first time and gone "You know what? It's really changed without Stephen, hasn't it?"

to:

-->'''Josh:''' --->'''Josh:''' I love the idea that someone has turned on this for the first time and gone "You know what? It's really changed without Stephen, hasn't it?"
3rd Feb '17 8:50:15 PM eowynjedi
Is there an issue? Send a Message



to:

* Next:
** Emily Porter explains clickbait articles: "They're called listicles, which is a pormanteau of 'list' and 'testicles' because they're complete bollocks."
** Ross Noble claiming to be a time-traveler when Sandi shows an old portrait of a Croatian with curly black hair, and then being shocked that he's put on so much weight when it changes to a portly Frenchman.
** Sandi seeking out and asking the name of the ''specific'' audience member who tripped the klaxon by shouting "Spongebob Squarepants" in response to asking who has green sponge balls.
19th Jan '17 12:39:39 PM bjex
Is there an issue? Send a Message


--> ''[klaxon]''

to:

--> ''[klaxon]''''[klaxon]'' ''[Screen: "IT ISN'T FUNNY"]''
7th Jan '17 1:11:56 AM SeptimusHeap
Is there an issue? Send a Message


-->'''Alan and Stephen:''' ''[[[FreudWasRight look]]]''

to:

-->'''Alan and Stephen:''' ''[[[FreudWasRight look]]]''''[look]''
5th Jan '17 11:43:38 AM FalconPain
Is there an issue? Send a Message



to:

-->'''Josh:''' I love the idea that someone has turned on this for the first time and gone "You know what? It's really changed without Stephen, hasn't it?"
27th Dec '16 7:16:51 PM eowynjedi
Is there an issue? Send a Message



to:

* The parlor games in Noel.
** "Taboo," where the answer must not contain the forbidden letter (in this case N).
-->'''Susan:''' You're looking at me like the Eye of Sauron!\\
'''Sandi:''' [deadpan] 'Sauron' has an N in it.
** "Are You There, Moriarty?" in Noel consists of one blindfolded person grasping the hand of another blindfolded person, calling out "Are you there, Moriarty?" and then beating them around the head with a rolled-up newspaper. Alan starts beating up poor Josh as soon as Sandi explains the rules.
27th Dec '16 6:21:42 PM nombretomado
Is there an issue? Send a Message


* BrianBlessed pulling Sean Lock off his chair. Repeatedly.

to:

* BrianBlessed Creator/BrianBlessed pulling Sean Lock off his chair. Repeatedly.



** [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CJB20mC4Rqc#t=90s The panelists trying out their buzzers]], getting little crystalline chimes... and when BrianBlessed tries his, he of course gets massive church bells.

to:

** [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CJB20mC4Rqc#t=90s The panelists trying out their buzzers]], getting little crystalline chimes... and when BrianBlessed Creator/BrianBlessed tries his, he of course gets massive church bells.
22nd Dec '16 4:47:37 AM chrisboote
Is there an issue? Send a Message

Added DiffLines:

** Alternatively it may be a reference to that fact that sugar bowl pie is gay slang for analingus?
This list shows the last 10 events of 559. Show all.
http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/article_history.php?article=Funny.QI