History Funny / Postal

27th Apr '17 6:01:59 PM ZuTheSkunk
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* [=NPCs=] in Postal 2 are programmed to start vomiting if another NPC vomits on them. If these two [=NPCs]] happen to be facing each other, then this can lead to a constant loop of them repeatedly vomiting on each other.

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* [=NPCs=] in Postal 2 are programmed to start vomiting if another NPC vomits on them. If these two [=NPCs]] [=NPCs=] happen to be facing each other, then this can lead to a constant loop of them repeatedly vomiting on each other.
27th Apr '17 6:01:46 PM ZuTheSkunk
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--> '''The Postal Dude:''' [[SpoiledBrat Rich bastard!]]

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--> '''The Postal Dude:''' [[SpoiledBrat Rich bastard!]]bastard!]]
* [=NPCs=] in Postal 2 are programmed to start vomiting if another NPC vomits on them. If these two [=NPCs]] happen to be facing each other, then this can lead to a constant loop of them repeatedly vomiting on each other.
27th Mar '17 9:02:40 AM CodyPurple
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* [[spoiler: Postal 3!Dude]] manifests himself as the voice in the Postal Dude's head and often encourages him to just be violent (for example; he tells you to just kill vendors during some very long waits). That's right, ''[[HatesEveryoneEqually The Postal Dude]]'' has [[UpToEleven an evil voice in his head]].

to:

* [[spoiler: Postal 3!Dude]] manifests himself as the voice in the Postal Dude's head and often encourages him to just be violent (for example; he tells you to just kill vendors during some very long waits). That's right, ''[[HatesEveryoneEqually The Postal Dude]]'' has [[UpToEleven an evil voice in his head]].head]].
* Even though the Postal Dude now sounds like an actual lunatic in ''Redux'', but [[BlackComedy his dark sense of humor is still retained]] in several lines. Even with emotion added:
--> '''The Postal Dude:''' [[SarcasmMode Is there a doctor in the house?]]
--> '''The Postal Dude (In the beginning of EZ-Mart level):''' [[FlatWhat What?]] You don't sell ''POSTAL''?
--> '''The Postal Dude:''' Here's your low-price guarantee.
--> '''The Postal Dude:''' Now do you agree the customer's always right?
--> '''The Postal Dude:''' Sorry! He checked out already!
--> '''The Postal Dude:''' What do YOU MEAN this lane is closed?!
--> '''The Postal Dude (Emotionally):''' You must be freezing! [[KillItWithFire Let me warm you up...]]
--> '''The Postal Dude:''' Sorry, I'm out of hot towels. Will this do?
--> '''The Postal Dude:''' [[SpoiledBrat Rich bastard!]]
25th Sep '16 5:58:37 AM BreakinBenny
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Added DiffLines:

* There isn't a lot of amusing content in ''Postal 1'', but hostiles who [[ArtificialStupidity blow or burn themselves with their own throwables]] seems to be worth a laugh.
11th Jun '16 8:17:31 PM valos
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Added DiffLines:

** It's also possible to hold off on the petition objective until reaching Gary Coleman. If some well-placed violence disrupts the scripted book-signing without turning him hostile, it's possible to pester him for signatures. Leading to extra amusement if the attempt actually succeeds.
17th May '16 1:14:40 PM CoolPopper
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* Immediately following the elephant-killing errand in ''Apocalypse Weekend'', one of the animal rights activists shows up out of nowhere and declares you must be stopped. And then a rampaging elephant ''also'' shows up out of nowhere and kills him before he can do anything.

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* Immediately following the elephant-killing errand in ''Apocalypse Weekend'', one of the animal rights activists shows up out of nowhere and declares you must be stopped. [[DeathByIrony And then a rampaging elephant ''also'' shows up out of nowhere and kills him before he can do anything.]]
17th May '16 1:12:13 PM CoolPopper
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* Immediately following the elephant-killing errand in ''Apocalypse Weekend'', one of the animal rights activists shows up out of nowhere and declares you must be stopped. And then a rampaging elephant ''also'' shows up out of nowhere and [[Irony kills him before he can do anything.]]

to:

* Immediately following the elephant-killing errand in ''Apocalypse Weekend'', one of the animal rights activists shows up out of nowhere and declares you must be stopped. And then a rampaging elephant ''also'' shows up out of nowhere and [[Irony kills him before he can do anything.]]
17th May '16 1:11:30 PM CoolPopper
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* Immediately following the elephant-killing errand in ''Apocalypse Weekend'', one of the animal rights activists shows up out of nowhere and declares you must be stopped. And then a rampaging elephant ''also'' shows up out of nowhere and kills him before he can do anything.

to:

* Immediately following the elephant-killing errand in ''Apocalypse Weekend'', one of the animal rights activists shows up out of nowhere and declares you must be stopped. And then a rampaging elephant ''also'' shows up out of nowhere and [[Irony kills him before he can do anything.]]
1st May '16 2:38:38 PM BNSF1995
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If you have a small dick, step up closer to the plate.]]\\

to:

If you have a small dick, bat, step up closer to the plate.]]\\



[[AC:Damnit I said don't splash me, impotent human. Good God that is disgusting. Thanks for the urine.]]\\

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[[AC:Damnit I said don't splash me, impotent impudent human. Good God that is disgusting. Thanks for the urine.]]\\
8th Nov '15 6:25:06 PM Kadorhal
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[[GunNut "My president is]] [[Creator/CharltonHeston Chuck Heston]]. Here's your rebate, [[Film/PlanetOfTheApes1968 you damn dirty apes!]]"

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[[GunNut "My president is]] [[Creator/CharltonHeston Chuck Heston]]. Here's your rebate, [[Film/PlanetOfTheApes1968 you damn dirty apes!]]"apes!]]"\\



** It's made funnier when Gary threatens you with violence if he ever catches you selling it on eBay. If Gary ends up dying during the police brawl afterwards, The Postal Dude's wife will attempt to do this very thing once he returns home, since [[DeadArtistsAreBetter celebrity merchandise became more sought for after their death]].

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** It's made funnier when Gary threatens you with violence if he ever catches you selling it on eBay. If eBay, which becomes a BrickJoke at the end of the day:
-->'''Wife:''' Hey, did you get
Gary ends up dying during the police brawl afterwards, The Postal Dude's wife will attempt to do this very thing once he returns home, since Coleman's autograph? I can get a small fortune for it on eBay.\\
'''The Dude:''' Right, a ''small'' fortune. Say, aren't those things
[[DeadArtistsAreBetter celebrity merchandise became more sought for valuable after their death]]. the person is, um... deceased?]]\\
'''Wife:''' Yes. Why?\\
'''The Dude:''' [[SuspiciouslySpecificDenial No reason. Can I borrow your computer?]]



** ''Paradise Lost'' gets not one, but ''two'' successor errands to the petition-signing. First is asking around for info about Champ on Monday, wherein the Dude shows off a picture of Champ to ask if the person has seen them... and they immediately run in terror. The Dude seems oblivious at first, but then quickly catches on. It also calls back to the petition, where the Dude tells the last person you ask to tell him if they've seen the dog in the picture, or else he'll follow them home and kill ''their'' dog.
-->'''The Dude:''' Hey, if I show you this picture, are you gonna run away screaming?\\
'''Citizen:''' The horror! ''(runs away screaming)''\\
'''The Dude:''' Yeah, that's what I thought would happen.
** The second is the charity drive on Wednesday, where one of your errands is to quickly get three-thousand dollars, so the Dude runs around town with an old-time cup asking for loose change. Like the petition, he starts out asking sweetly (though dodging explaining exactly what cause he's raising money for), gets annoyed if he asks to ask a second time, then threatens them for the third time. Unlike the petition, it's almost impossible to actually make enough money normally, as the split-personality starts hinting at after you've passed around 400 bucks.



* [[spoiler: Postal3!Dude]] manifest himself as the voice in the Postal Dude's head and often encourage him to just be violent (for example; he tells you to just kill the vendor during a very long wait). That's right, [[HatesEveryoneEqually The Postal Dude]] has an evil voice in his head.

to:

* [[spoiler: Postal3!Dude]] manifest Postal 3!Dude]] manifests himself as the voice in the Postal Dude's head and often encourage encourages him to just be violent (for example; he tells you to just kill the vendor vendors during a some very long wait). waits). That's right, [[HatesEveryoneEqually ''[[HatesEveryoneEqually The Postal Dude]] Dude]]'' has [[UpToEleven an evil voice in his head.head]].
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http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/article_history.php?article=Funny.Postal