History Funny / NCIS

6th Dec '16 6:00:17 PM Bissek
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Added DiffLines:

* Attempted high-speed getaway in a Driver's Ed car. The would-be escapee got about a hundred yards before the instructor hit the backup brake.
30th Nov '16 3:40:11 PM Andrzej
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--->'''[=McGee=]''': This is, uh...this is kinda embarrassing...\\
'''Ducky''': I'm a doctor, [=McGee=]. I've seen everything there is to see more times than I care to remember.\\

to:

--->'''[=McGee=]''': --->'''[=McGee=]:''' This is, uh...this is kinda embarrassing...\\
'''Ducky''': '''Ducky:''' I'm a doctor, [=McGee=]. I've seen everything there is to see more times than I care to remember.\\



'''Ducky''': ''Good Lord.''

to:

'''Ducky''': '''Ducky:''' ''Good Lord.''



--->'''Mrs. Mallard''': Show me your knickers!\\
'''Kate''': Um... ma'am?\\
'''Mrs. Mallard''': Your underwear, missy. ''[creepy low voice]'' One can always tell a woman's intention from her panties.\\
'''Tony''': [[HandsomeLech That's always been my philosophy.]]

to:

--->'''Mrs. Mallard''': Mallard:''' Show me your knickers!\\
'''Kate''': '''Kate:''' Um... ma'am?\\
'''Mrs. Mallard''': Mallard:''' Your underwear, missy. ''[creepy low voice]'' One can always tell a woman's intention from her panties.\\
'''Tony''': '''Tony:''' [[HandsomeLech That's always been my philosophy.]]



--->'''Tony''': NO BOSS!! [[BigNo NOOO BOSS]]!! YOU CAN'T DO THIS TO ME!! I'm on the verge man!! ''[Gibbs gets into his car and drives away]'' I'M GONNA GO POSTAL!!!

to:

--->'''Tony''': --->'''Tony:''' NO BOSS!! [[BigNo NOOO BOSS]]!! YOU CAN'T DO THIS TO ME!! I'm on the verge man!! ''[Gibbs gets into his car and drives away]'' I'M GONNA GO POSTAL!!!



--> '''Ziva:''' I am wondering why there is a nine milliliter hole in my hat?
--> '''Gibbs:''' ''(beat)'' Ventilation.

to:

--> '''Ziva:''' -->'''Ziva:''' I am wondering why there is a nine milliliter hole in my hat?
-->
hat?\\
'''Gibbs:''' ''(beat)'' Ventilation.



-->'''Ziva:''' You think they bought it?\\

to:

-->'''Ziva:''' --->'''Ziva:''' You think they bought it?\\



--->'''Tony''': Guy looks like a piece of beef jerky, Duck.\\

to:

--->'''Tony''': --->'''Tony:''' Guy looks like a piece of beef jerky, Duck.\\



'''Gibbs''': How'd he die?\\
'''Ducky''': Well, the "how" I'm still working on...It's made particularly difficult by the means by which his body was preserved. He was, quite literally, smoked inside that chimney.\\
'''Ziva''': ''Smoked?''\\
'''Ducky''': Yea, like a fine cut of meat.\\
'''Tony''': ...So he really ''is'' a [[BrickJoke beef jerky.]]

to:

'''Gibbs''': '''Gibbs:''' How'd he die?\\
'''Ducky''': '''Ducky:''' Well, the "how" I'm still working on...It's made particularly difficult by the means by which his body was preserved. He was, quite literally, smoked inside that chimney.\\
'''Ziva''': '''Ziva:''' ''Smoked?''\\
'''Ducky''': '''Ducky:''' Yea, like a fine cut of meat.\\
'''Tony''': ...'''Tony:''' ...So he really ''is'' a [[BrickJoke beef jerky.]]



-->'''[=McGee=]''': [[WhereTheHellIsSpringfield Where the hell is Edenvale?]]\\
'''Tony''': Keep scrolling, probie.\\
'''[=McGee=]''': I am scrolling, I'm telling you I can't find it.\\
'''Tony''': It's not on the map.\\
'''[=McGee=]''': Boondocks.\\
'''Tony''': Boondocks, Boss!\\

to:

-->'''[=McGee=]''': -->'''[=McGee=]:''' [[WhereTheHellIsSpringfield Where the hell is Edenvale?]]\\
'''Tony''': '''Tony:''' Keep scrolling, probie.\\
'''[=McGee=]''': '''[=McGee=]:''' I am scrolling, I'm telling you I can't find it.\\
'''Tony''': '''Tony:''' It's not on the map.\\
'''[=McGee=]''': '''[=McGee=]:''' Boondocks.\\
'''Tony''': '''Tony:''' Boondocks, Boss!\\



'''Ziva''': What are boondocks?\\

to:

'''Ziva''': '''Ziva:''' What are boondocks?\\



'''Tony''': ''Ba na now now now now now now now.''\\
'''[=McGee=]''': ''Da na nong nong nong nong nong nong nong.''\\
'''Tony''': ''Ba na now now now now now now now.''\\
'''[=McGee=]''': ''Da na nong nong nong nong nong nong nong.''\\

to:

'''Tony''': '''Tony:''' ''Ba na now now now now now now now.''\\
'''[=McGee=]''': '''[=McGee=]:''' ''Da na nong nong nong nong nong nong nong.''\\
'''Tony''': '''Tony:''' ''Ba na now now now now now now now.''\\
'''[=McGee=]''': '''[=McGee=]:''' ''Da na nong nong nong nong nong nong nong.''\\



--> "Gee, I hope she recovers from that tongue-lashing."

to:

--> "Gee, --->'''Gibbs:''' Gee, I hope she recovers from that tongue-lashing."



--->'''Tim''': Hey! The "Tommy Lee Jones Speech", every time we have a fugitive, really?

to:

--->'''Tim''': --->'''Tim:''' Hey! The "Tommy Lee Jones Speech", every time we have a fugitive, really?



-->'''Tony''': '''So''' many questions! My mind is... ''[spins office chair]'' '''spinning''' with questions! I mean, have you ever thought about it? He actually came from somewhere! He didn't just '''appear''', y'know; he didn't just '''start Gibbs''', he was a '''boy''', and then he '''grew!'''\\
'''Ziva''': [[{{Golem}} I thought he was molded from clay, had life breathed into him by a group of mystics!]]\\
'''[=McGee=]''': [[Comicbook/{{Superman}} That's funny, I thought he fell to Earth in a capsule, after his home planet exploded!]]\\
'''Ziva''': ''[laughs]'' [[Myth/ClassicalMythology No, he burst forth, full grown, from the mind of Zeus!]]\\
'''[=McGee=]''': Nice.\\
'''Tony''': He is the avatar of [[Myth/HinduMythology Vishnu.]] He was sent to be the left hand of '''[[{{God}} Yahweh]].''' He was grown in a '''cabbage patch.''' I'm trying to pose a serious metaphysical question here!

to:

-->'''Tony''': '''So''' -->'''Tony:''' ''So'' many questions! My mind is... ''[spins office chair]'' '''spinning''' ''spinning'' with questions! I mean, have you ever thought about it? He actually came from somewhere! He didn't just '''appear''', ''appear'', y'know; he didn't just '''start Gibbs''', ''start Gibbs'', he was a '''boy''', ''boy'', and then he '''grew!'''\\
'''Ziva''':
''grew!''\\
'''Ziva:'''
[[{{Golem}} I thought he was molded from clay, had life breathed into him by a group of mystics!]]\\
'''[=McGee=]''': '''[=McGee=]:''' [[Comicbook/{{Superman}} That's funny, I thought he fell to Earth in a capsule, after his home planet exploded!]]\\
'''Ziva''': '''Ziva:''' ''[laughs]'' [[Myth/ClassicalMythology No, he burst forth, full grown, from the mind of Zeus!]]\\
'''[=McGee=]''': '''[=McGee=]:''' Nice.\\
'''Tony''': '''Tony:''' He is the avatar of [[Myth/HinduMythology Vishnu.]] He was sent to be the left hand of '''[[{{God}} Yahweh]].''' He was grown in a '''cabbage patch.''' I'm trying to pose a serious metaphysical question here!



'''Tony:''' "My mother isn't quite herself today."\\

to:

'''Tony:''' "My My mother isn't quite herself today."\\\\



'''Tony:''' ''Film/{{Psycho}}''.\\

to:

'''Tony:''' ''Film/{{Psycho}}''.Film/{{Psycho}}.\\



'''Tony:''' "Mother...blood. Blood!"\\
'''Ziva:''' ''[to Gibbs]'' ''Film/{{Psycho}}''.\\

to:

'''Tony:''' "Mother...Mother...blood. Blood!"\\
Blood!\\
'''Ziva:''' ''[to Gibbs]'' ''Film/{{Psycho}}''.Film/{{Psycho}}.\\



-->'''Dinozzo''': Remind me to never have a hangover in Israel.\\
'''Gibbs''': [=DiNozzo=].\\
'''Dinozzo''': Not that I have an hangover now, boss. You know I would never drink alone on a school night.\\
'''Gibbs''': Where were you last night?\\
'''Dinozzo''': ...Drinking.\\
'''Gibs''': You alone?\\
'''Dinozzo''': Of course not. ''[{{beat}}]'' Not that there's anything wrong with drinking bourbon alone...in your basement...with a boat...
* In "Bounce", the team's reactions to Tony being the boss.
-->[[RunningGag You're going back to Mexico?]]
-->'''[=McGee=]:''' He walks around with that peacock strut, and that smirk. It's like...heh, he's behind me, isn't he?\\

to:

-->'''Dinozzo''': -->'''Dinozzo:''' Remind me to never have a hangover in Israel.\\
'''Gibbs''': '''Gibbs:''' [=DiNozzo=].\\
'''Dinozzo''': '''Dinozzo:''' Not that I have an a hangover now, boss. You know I would never drink alone on a school night.\\
'''Gibbs''': '''Gibbs:''' Where were you last night?\\
'''Dinozzo''': ...'''Dinozzo:''' ...Drinking.\\
'''Gibs''': '''Gibs:''' You alone?\\
'''Dinozzo''': '''Dinozzo:''' Of course not. ''[{{beat}}]'' Not that there's anything wrong with drinking bourbon alone...in your basement...with a boat...
* In "Bounce", the "Bounce":
** The
team's reactions to Tony being the boss.
-->[[RunningGag You're going back to Mexico?]]
-->'''[=McGee=]:'''
--->'''[=McGee=]:''' He walks around with that peacock strut, and that smirk. It's like...heh, he's behind me, isn't he?\\



'''Tony:''' About two minutes.

to:

'''Tony:''' About two minutes.** Also
--->[[RunningGag "You're going back to Mexico?"]]



-->'''[=DiNozzo=]''': ''[staring at the collage in question]'' It's like one of those hidden eye posters where if you stare at it for long enough it makes a picture...''[Gibbs comes in and dope slaps him]'' That's it! It's out of focus! ''[camera focuses on his face; his eyes are unfocused]'' [[{{Cloudcuckoolander}} It's dolphins! In moonlight!]]

to:

-->'''[=DiNozzo=]''': -->'''[=DiNozzo=]:''' ''[staring at the collage in question]'' It's like one of those hidden eye posters where if you stare at it for long enough it makes a picture...''[Gibbs comes in and dope slaps him]'' That's it! It's out of focus! ''[camera focuses on his face; his eyes are unfocused]'' [[{{Cloudcuckoolander}} It's dolphins! In moonlight!]]



--->'''Gibbs:''' Get Ziva and Dinozzo out of bed.
--->'''[=McGee=]:''' What?!
--->'''Gibbs:''' Wake 'em up.
--->'''[=McGee=]:''' Right, um get them out of bed, because it's the middle of the night and they're asleep.
--->'''Gibbs (annoyed):''' Yes.
--->'''[=McGee=]:''' Individual beds.Get them out of individual beds.I was confused.I thought we were talking---
--->'''Gibbs:''' Need some sleep yourself, do you, [=McGee=]?

to:

--->'''Gibbs:''' Get Ziva and Dinozzo out of bed. \n--->'''[=McGee=]:''' What?!\n--->'''Gibbs:''' \\
'''[=McGee=]:''' What?!\\
'''Gibbs:'''
Wake 'em up.
--->'''[=McGee=]:'''
up.\\
'''[=McGee=]:'''
Right, um get them out of bed, because it's the middle of the night and they're asleep.
--->'''Gibbs
asleep.\\
'''Gibbs
(annoyed):''' Yes.
--->'''[=McGee=]:'''
Yes.\\
'''[=McGee=]:'''
Individual beds.beds. Get them out of individual beds.beds. I was confused.confused. I thought we were talking---
--->'''Gibbs:'''
talking--\\
'''Gibbs:'''
Need some sleep yourself, do you, [=McGee=]?



-->'''Abby''': Abby has to pee. ''[runs out of room]''

to:

-->'''Abby''': -->'''Abby:''' Abby has to pee. ''[runs out of room]''



-->'''Tony''': I miss the old Ziva.\\
'''Ziva''': [[GettingCrapPastTheRadar I can tell]].\\
'''Tony''': [[BlatantLies Don't flatter yourself. That's my knee.]]

to:

-->'''Tony''': -->'''Tony:''' I miss the old Ziva.\\
'''Ziva''': '''Ziva:''' [[GettingCrapPastTheRadar I can tell]].\\
'''Tony''': '''Tony:''' [[BlatantLies Don't flatter yourself. That's my knee.]]



--->'''Tony''': [[ItMakesSenseInContext You can't outrun me, I'm wearing tube socks!]]

to:

--->'''Tony''': --->'''Tony:''' [[ItMakesSenseInContext You can't outrun me, I'm wearing tube socks!]]



--->'''Tony''': I have a degree in Physical Education! I played varsity basketball at Ohio State! This isn't going to end well for you! Your money-laundering days ''[runs through traffic and into the side of a car, then gets back up]'' are over!

to:

--->'''Tony''': --->'''Tony:''' I have a degree in Physical Education! I played varsity basketball at Ohio State! This isn't going to end well for you! Your money-laundering days ''[runs through traffic and into the side of a car, then gets back up]'' are over!



--->'''Witness:'''Wow. Talk about de ja vu. It's like the same interview, right down to the whipped boyfriend.
--->'''Tony (frown):''' Whipped?
--->'''Ziva:''' Boyfriend?

to:

--->'''Witness:'''Wow.--->'''Witness:''' Wow. Talk about de ja vu. It's like the same interview, right down to the whipped boyfriend. \n--->'''Tony (frown):''' Whipped?\n--->'''Ziva:''' \\
'''Tony:''' ''[frowns]'' Whipped?\\
'''Ziva:'''
Boyfriend?



--->'''Fornell''': Holy f--[[LastSecondWordSwap Fourth]] of July weenie roast! What the hell am I looking at? \\
'''[=McGee=]''': Boss, this is not what it looks like! \\
'''Gibbs''': ''What'' does it look like? \\
'''Diane''': We were talking and we fell asleep on the couch. \\
'''Fornell''': Intertwined like horny rabbits!

to:

--->'''Fornell''': --->'''Fornell:''' Holy f--[[LastSecondWordSwap Fourth]] of July weenie roast! What the hell am I looking at? \\
'''[=McGee=]''': '''[=McGee=]:''' Boss, this is not what it looks like! \\
'''Gibbs''': '''Gibbs:''' ''What'' does it look like? \\
'''Diane''': '''Diane:''' We were talking and we fell asleep on the couch. \\
'''Fornell''': '''Fornell:''' Intertwined like horny rabbits!



-->'''Bodnar:''' I want answers!\\

to:

-->'''Bodnar:''' --->'''Bodnar:''' I want answers!\\



-->'''Pitt''': You have four seconds.\\
'''Tony''': Excuse me. Four seconds for ''what?''\\
'''Tim''': ''[after sporting a brief OhCrap expression] Tony, RUN!!\\

to:

-->'''Pitt''': -->'''Pitt:''' You have four seconds.\\
'''Tony''': '''Tony:''' Excuse me. Four seconds for ''what?''\\
'''Tim''': '''Tim:''' ''[after sporting a brief OhCrap expression] Tony, RUN!!\\



'''Tony''': Way to be a team player, [=McGee=]!\\
'''Tim''': I'm sorry! I panicked, okay?

to:

'''Tony''': '''Tony:''' Way to be a team player, [=McGee=]!\\
'''Tim''': '''Tim:''' I'm sorry! I panicked, okay?



** Gibbs is musing about the evidence in the case. The camera pans over to reveal that he's addressing. . .a dog.
--> '''Gibbs''': Why am I telling ''you'' this?
--> (it gets even funnier if you notice the dog's expression--he really seems to be listening!)
* "Damned If You Do": [=McGee=] has just engaged in epic hackage, part of which involved cozying up the a "DOD beauty" name of Delilah.

to:

** Gibbs is musing about the evidence in the case. The camera pans over to reveal that he's addressing. . .addressing... a dog.
--> '''Gibbs''': Why am I telling ''you'' this?
--> (it
dog. It gets even funnier if you notice the dog's expression--he expression -- he really seems to be listening!)
listening!
--->'''Gibbs:''' Why am I telling ''you'' this?\\
* In "Damned If You Do": Do", [=McGee=] has just engaged in epic hackage, part of which involved cozying up the a "DOD beauty" name of Delilah.



-->'''Tony''': Okay, let this be a lesson to everyone here. When we say ''no liquids past this point'', we mean it!

to:

-->'''Tony''': -->'''Tony:''' Okay, let this be a lesson to everyone here. When we say ''no liquids past this point'', we mean it!



-->'''Eddie''': Hello, Diane. Oh, I heard we broke up. Sorry about that. Oh! And I'm a Secret Service agent.\\
'''Diane''': I heard. What's with the attitude?\\
'''Eddie''': I don't know? Maybe it's because you were sleeping with your ex-husband while we were dating.\\
'''Fornell''': Hey! ''[{{beat}}]'' The man has a point.\\
'''Diane''': Oh! So you guys are buddies now?\\
'''Gibbs''': Yeah. We're thinking about starting a club.\\
'''Diane''': Yeah? Well watch it, boys. I know something about each and everyone of you that you don't want anyone to know. And I've got a Twitter account!

to:

-->'''Eddie''': -->'''Eddie:''' Hello, Diane. Oh, I heard we broke up. Sorry about that. Oh! And I'm a Secret Service agent.\\
'''Diane''': '''Diane:''' I heard. What's with the attitude?\\
'''Eddie''': '''Eddie:''' I don't know? Maybe it's because you were sleeping with your ex-husband while we were dating.\\
'''Fornell''': '''Fornell:''' Hey! ''[{{beat}}]'' The man has a point.\\
'''Diane''': '''Diane:''' Oh! So you guys are buddies now?\\
'''Gibbs''': '''Gibbs:''' Yeah. We're thinking about starting a club.\\
'''Diane''': '''Diane:''' Yeah? Well watch it, boys. I know something about each and everyone of you that you don't want anyone to know. And I've got a Twitter account!



--> '''Pride''': "Uh, Gibbs. . ."
--> '''Gibbs''': "Oh, yeah. I know. Making room." (steps back)
--> (man continues to make nasty remarks. Pride grabs ahold of him)
--> '''Gibbs''': "Uh oh."
--> (Pride proceeds to throw the man over the hood of a nearby parked car)
** Later, they unnerve the guy by playing Go Fish in interrogation.

to:

--> '''Pride''': "Uh, Gibbs. . ."
--> '''Gibbs''': "Oh,
--->'''Pride:''' Uh, Gibbs...\\
'''Gibbs:''' ''[steps back]'' Oh,
yeah. I know. Making room." (steps back)
--> (man continues
\\
'''Suspect:''' ''[continues
to make nasty remarks. Pride grabs remarks]''\\
'''Pride:''' ''[grabs
ahold of him)
--> '''Gibbs''': "Uh
him]''\\
'''Gibbs:''' Uh
oh."
--> (Pride proceeds to throw
\\
'''Pride:''' ''[throws
the man over the hood of a nearby parked car)
car]''
** Later, they unnerve the guy by playing Go Fish in interrogation.



--> ''(Gibbs stops the elevator)''
--> '''Pride''': You stole that move from me! ''I'' used to be the one who stopped elevators!
--> '''Gibbs''': Stole, my ass!

to:

--> ''(Gibbs stops --->'''Gibbs:''' ''[stops the elevator)''
--> '''Pride''':
elevator]''\\
'''Pride:'''
You stole that move from me! ''I'' used to be the one who stopped elevators!
--> '''Gibbs''':
elevators!\\
'''Gibbs:'''
Stole, my ass!



-->'''Tony''': ''Who put you in here?''\\
'''Delilah''': You alone?\\
'''Tony''': ''[eyes the cutout]'' In my own way.

to:

-->'''Tony''': -->'''Tony:''' ''Who put you in here?''\\
'''Delilah''': '''Delilah:''' You alone?\\
'''Tony''': '''Tony:''' ''[eyes the cutout]'' In my own way.



--->'''Diane''': "Holy Fourth of July weenie roast! ''What the hell am I looking at?!?!''"

to:

--->'''Diane''': "Holy --->'''Diane:''' Holy Fourth of July weenie roast! ''What the hell am I looking at?!?!''"at?!?!''



--> "Oh, look! There's. . .a cat outside. I think I'll go help it."

to:

--> "Oh, --->'''[=McGee=]:''' Oh, look! There's. . .a cat outside. I think I'll go help it."



--->'''Ducky''': "There goes the coffee restriction."
** When Jimmy informs the other agents that Gibbs is off caffeine, he says he can't imagine how bad the already cranky Gibbs can be without it and starts making comparisons. [[RightBehindMe Just as Gibbs approaches the group.]]
--->'''Jimmy''': "Gibbs without his coffee? That'd be like King Kong without his bananas." (laughs, then sees everyone else's faces and cringes) "I'm not gonna turn around."
--->'''Gibbs''': "Good idea."

to:

--->'''Ducky''': "There --->'''Ducky:''' There goes the coffee restriction."
restriction.
** When Jimmy informs the other agents that Gibbs is off caffeine, he says he can't imagine how bad the already cranky Gibbs can be without it and starts making comparisons. [[RightBehindMe Just as Gibbs approaches the group.]]
--->'''Jimmy''': "Gibbs
]]
--->'''Jimmy:''' Gibbs
without his coffee? That'd be like King Kong without his bananas." (laughs, bananas. ''[laughs, then sees everyone else's faces and cringes) "I'm cringes]'' I'm not gonna turn around."
--->'''Gibbs''': "Good
\\
'''Gibbs:''' Good
idea."



-->'''Ducky''': Thirty years ago, if somebody told me that a device contained in a bracelet could send me an email about my performance in bed, I would have said... [cue Gibbs walking in unseen] what the blazes is an email?
* In "Lockdown", Gibbs is going undercover for a supposed deal to sell "one of the deadliest neurotoxins on the planet" to a Latvian crime boss, only to discover that he is selling the ''botox'' to old women. Cue Gibbs' ''priceless'' OhCrap face while he {{button mash|ing}}es the panic button to signal his team to rush into the scene as the group of women approaches him expecting treatment like a pack of wolves to a little lamb.

to:

-->'''Ducky''': -->'''Ducky:''' Thirty years ago, if somebody told me that a device contained in a bracelet could send me an email about my performance in bed, I would have said... [cue Gibbs walking in unseen] what the blazes is an email?
* In "Lockdown", Gibbs is going undercover for a supposed deal to sell "one of the deadliest neurotoxins on the planet" to a Latvian crime boss, only to discover that he is selling the ''botox'' to old women. Cue Gibbs' ''priceless'' OhCrap face while he {{button mash|ing}}es the panic button to signal his team to rush into the scene as the group of women approaches him expecting treatment like a pack of wolves to a little lamb.



-->'''Gibbs''': [[LameComeback You take a nap!]]
* In "Sister Cities," NCIS New Orleans agent Sonja is looking at photos of Abby and her brother.
-->'''Sonja''': Why are they all on Halloween?
-->'''Tony''': That's just how she dresses.

to:

-->'''Gibbs''': -->'''Gibbs:''' [[LameComeback You take a nap!]]
* In "Sister Cities," NCIS New Orleans agent Sonja is looking at photos of Abby and her brother.
-->'''Sonja''':
brother.
-->'''Sonja:'''
Why are they all on Halloween?
-->'''Tony''':
Halloween?\\
'''Tony:'''
That's just how she dresses.



-->'''Tony:''' Aren't your parents deaf?
-->'''Abby:''' Yeah, so he walked around with his hands in his pockets.

to:

-->'''Tony:''' Aren't your parents deaf?
-->'''Abby:'''
deaf?\\
'''Abby:'''
Yeah, so he walked around with his hands in his pockets.



--> '''Vance:''' [pulls up on a motorcycle next to the others] Gentlemen, let's ride!

to:

--> '''Vance:''' -->'''Vance:''' [pulls up on a motorcycle next to the others] Gentlemen, let's ride!



--> '''[=McGee=]''': Whatever comes to your head first. Don't even think about it. Just whatever comes to your head first. What is it?
--> '''Tony''': Peanut.
--> '''[=McGee=]''': What's the second thing that pops in your head?
--> '''Tony''': Brett Favre.
--> '''[=McGee=]''': Okay, does this look like the USS ''Peanut'' to you? The USS ''[[UsefulNotes/NationalFootballLeague Brett Favre]]''?

to:

--> '''[=McGee=]''': -->'''[=McGee=]:''' Whatever comes to your head first. Don't even think about it. Just whatever comes to your head first. What is it?
--> '''Tony''': Peanut.
--> '''[=McGee=]''':
it?\\
'''Tony:''' Peanut.\\
'''[=McGee=]:'''
What's the second thing that pops in your head?
--> '''Tony''':
head?\\
'''Tony:'''
Brett Favre.
--> '''[=McGee=]''':
Favre.\\
'''[=McGee=]:'''
Okay, does this look like the USS ''Peanut'' to you? The USS ''[[UsefulNotes/NationalFootballLeague Brett Favre]]''?



--> '''Fornell:''' [notices his feet] What the...?
--> '''Gibbs:''' Em.

to:

--> '''Fornell:''' [notices --->'''Fornell:''' ''[notices his feet] feet]'' What the...?
-->
?\\
'''Gibbs:''' Em.



-->'''[=DiNozzo=]''': "Wait a second. Is ''that'' how Gibbs is always able to---"
--> (right on cue, Gibbs appears out of nowhere)
-->'''Gibbs''': "--walk up behind you and finish your sentences?"

to:

-->'''[=DiNozzo=]''': "Wait -->'''[=DiNozzo=]:''' Wait a second. Is ''that'' how Gibbs is always able to---"
--> (right on cue, Gibbs appears
to--\\
'''Gibbs:''' ''[appears
out of nowhere)
-->'''Gibbs''': "--walk
nowhere]'' --walk up behind you and finish your sentences?"sentences?



[[folder: Season 14]]

to:

[[folder: Season [[folder:Season 14]]
30th Nov '16 5:39:03 AM Selenite
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* In "Lockdown", Gibbs is going undercover for a supposed deal to sell toxins to a Latvian crime boss, only to discover that he is selling the "toxin" to old women - turns out the toxin was botox, and cue Gibbs signaling for help.

to:

* In "Lockdown", Gibbs is going undercover for a supposed deal to sell toxins "one of the deadliest neurotoxins on the planet" to a Latvian crime boss, only to discover that he is selling the "toxin" ''botox'' to old women. Cue Gibbs' ''priceless'' OhCrap face while he {{button mash|ing}}es the panic button to signal his team to rush into the scene as the group of women - turns out the toxin was botox, and cue Gibbs signaling for help.approaches him expecting treatment like a pack of wolves to a little lamb.
29th Nov '16 5:55:22 PM DrOO7
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Added DiffLines:

* "Caught On Tape". A suspect's dog barks, snarls, and snaps at Kate, only to fall in LoveAtFirstSight with Gibbs--and the feeling is mutual.
29th Nov '16 4:36:48 PM Bissek
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* In the Thanksgiving episode, it's revealed that Bishop's gotten over her failed marriage and has started dating again - with a coworker. Her brothers (who are visiting for the holidays) spend the entire episode scouring NCIS trying to identify and TwerpSweat their sister's new boyfriend.

to:

* In the Thanksgiving episode, it's revealed that Bishop's gotten over her failed marriage and has started dating again - with a coworker. Her brothers (who are visiting for the holidays) spend the entire episode scouring NCIS trying to identify and TwerpSweat [[TwerpSweating Twerp Sweat]] their sister's new boyfriend.
29th Nov '16 4:36:29 PM Bissek
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* In "Home of the Brave", Abby, [=McGee=], and Bishop try to woo [=DiNozzo=] Sr. into handing over Tony's apartment - Abby tries to "Caf Pow" and dine him, [=McGee=] gives him a photo book of him and Delilah, and Bishop writes an essay. And in the end, it's [[DarkHorseVictory Torres]] that gets the apartment after the elder [=DiNozzo=] decides to draw a name out of a hat - Ducky's hat.

to:

* In "Home of the Brave", Abby, [=McGee=], and Bishop try to woo [=DiNozzo=] Sr. into handing over Tony's apartment - Abby tries to "Caf Pow" and dine him, [=McGee=] gives him a photo book of him and Delilah, and Bishop writes an essay. And in the end, it's [[DarkHorseVictory Torres]] that gets the apartment after the elder [=DiNozzo=] decides to draw a name out of a hat - Ducky's hat. [[spoiler:Though Torres later cedes the apartment to Tim after seeing the photo book]]
* In the Thanksgiving episode, it's revealed that Bishop's gotten over her failed marriage and has started dating again - with a coworker. Her brothers (who are visiting for the holidays) spend the entire episode scouring NCIS trying to identify and TwerpSweat their sister's new boyfriend.
17th Nov '16 12:35:28 PM cinemamaster
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* In "Home of the Brave", Abby, [=McGee=], and Bishop try to woo [=DiNozzo=] Sr. into handing over Tony's apartment - Abby tries to "Caf Pow" and dine him, [=McGee=] gives him a photo book of him and Delilah, and Bishop writes an essay. And in the end, it's [[DarkHorseVictor Torres]] that gets the apartment after the elder [=DiNozzo=] decides to draw a name out of a hat - Ducky's hat.

to:

* In "Home of the Brave", Abby, [=McGee=], and Bishop try to woo [=DiNozzo=] Sr. into handing over Tony's apartment - Abby tries to "Caf Pow" and dine him, [=McGee=] gives him a photo book of him and Delilah, and Bishop writes an essay. And in the end, it's [[DarkHorseVictor [[DarkHorseVictory Torres]] that gets the apartment after the elder [=DiNozzo=] decides to draw a name out of a hat - Ducky's hat.
17th Nov '16 12:35:09 PM cinemamaster
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* In "Home of the Brave", Abby, [=McGee=], and Bishop try to woo [=DiNozzo=] Sr. into handing over Tony's apartment - Abby tries to "Caf Pow" and dine him, [=McGee=] gives him a photo book of him and Delilah, and Bishop writes an essay. And in the end, it's [[DarkHorseWinner Torres]] that gets the apartment after the elder [=DiNozzo=] decides to draw a name out of a hat - Ducky's hat.

to:

* In "Home of the Brave", Abby, [=McGee=], and Bishop try to woo [=DiNozzo=] Sr. into handing over Tony's apartment - Abby tries to "Caf Pow" and dine him, [=McGee=] gives him a photo book of him and Delilah, and Bishop writes an essay. And in the end, it's [[DarkHorseWinner [[DarkHorseVictor Torres]] that gets the apartment after the elder [=DiNozzo=] decides to draw a name out of a hat - Ducky's hat.
17th Nov '16 12:34:50 PM cinemamaster
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* In "Home of the Brave", Abby, [=McGee=], and Bishop try to woo [=DiNozzo=] Sr. into handing over Tony's apartment - Abby tries to "Caf Pow" and dine him, [=McGee=] gives him a photo book of him and Delilah, and Bishop writes an essay. And in the end, it's [[UnlikelyVictor Torres]] that gets the apartment after the elder [=DiNozzo=] decides to draw a name out of a hat - Ducky's hat.

to:

* In "Home of the Brave", Abby, [=McGee=], and Bishop try to woo [=DiNozzo=] Sr. into handing over Tony's apartment - Abby tries to "Caf Pow" and dine him, [=McGee=] gives him a photo book of him and Delilah, and Bishop writes an essay. And in the end, it's [[UnlikelyVictor [[DarkHorseWinner Torres]] that gets the apartment after the elder [=DiNozzo=] decides to draw a name out of a hat - Ducky's hat.
17th Nov '16 12:33:59 PM cinemamaster
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Added DiffLines:

* In "Home of the Brave", Abby, [=McGee=], and Bishop try to woo [=DiNozzo=] Sr. into handing over Tony's apartment - Abby tries to "Caf Pow" and dine him, [=McGee=] gives him a photo book of him and Delilah, and Bishop writes an essay. And in the end, it's [[UnlikelyVictor Torres]] that gets the apartment after the elder [=DiNozzo=] decides to draw a name out of a hat - Ducky's hat.
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http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/article_history.php?article=Funny.NCIS