History Funny / MockTheWeek

28th Jan '16 7:21:41 AM TheHeroHartmut
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* Series 9 episode 5, where Dara introduces a story about how research has shown that people with large heads may be less affected by Alzheimer's disease. Specifically, an article he showed the panel that had referred to him as an example of someone with a 'giant head', even including a picture of his head with the caption 'EXTRA LARGE'. The panel proceeds to spend five minutes [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7HYxJp02W1w&feature=related mocking Dara's big head non-stop]]. Poor GenreBlind Dara. -->'''Ed Byrne:''' Dara! Protect us from the Alzheimer's!
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* Series 9 episode 5, where Dara introduces a story about how research has shown that people with large heads may be less affected by Alzheimer's disease. Specifically, an article he showed the panel that had referred to him as an example of someone with a 'giant head', even including a picture of his head with the caption 'EXTRA LARGE'. The panel proceeds to spend five minutes [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7HYxJp02W1w&feature=related mocking Dara's big head non-stop]]. Poor GenreBlind Dara. -->'''Ed Byrne:''' Dara! Protect us from Dara, though he does get the Alzheimer's!last laugh in the end. -->'''Dara:''' I was expecting sympathy!\\ '''Ed:''' You were expecting sympathy?!\\ '''Chris:''' "I revealed a weakness in front of six comedians, and I thought 'There's a group that'll help me through this!'"\\ ''[audience laughs]''\\ '''Dara:''' I think of you all as friends; [[StealthInsult I don't think of you as comedians.]]
28th Jan '16 6:58:19 AM TheHeroHartmut
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-->'''Dara:''' One of the worrying things ''I've'' noticed is Frankie, who appears to be the '''king''' of the Daleks!\\
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-->'''Dara:''' One of the The worrying things ''I've'' noticed detail that Felix has picked up on is Frankie, who appears to be Frankie's role, where Frankie's, in fact, the '''king''' of the Daleks!\\
28th Jan '16 6:55:00 AM TheHeroHartmut
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* In the first Christmas special, one of the viewers ([[WhatDoYouMeanItsNotForKids an eleven year old boy]]) sends in a picture of what the Mock The Week studio would look like if it was under attack by Daleks.
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* In the first Christmas special, one of the viewers ([[WhatDoYouMeanItsNotForKids an eleven year old boy]]) [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hiLrO_daT3U&t=2m20s sends in a picture picture]] of what the Mock The Week studio would look like if it was under attack by Daleks.[[Series/DoctorWho Daleks]].
9th Jan '16 6:43:45 AM LordAaronus
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* Greg Davies' impression of Peter Andre. Dara tries to stop him but he keeps going to the point where everyone, Dara included, is absolutely losing their shit laughing. ** In the series 11 outtakes, Chris can't help noticing that Greg's impression of the Queen sounds like his Peter Andre impression, to which Greg responds, in the voice: --->"DON'T COMPARE ME TO THE QUEEN!"

* From series 11 episode 10, Ann Romney is an arsonist and Mitt Romney doesn't know much about either airplanes nor fire. [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WIHth_6x4-s#t=17m48s As seen here.]] -->'''Dara''': Douse it in petrol, that will keep it quiet for a while! Old newspapers! Old newspapers! Smother it in shavings of woods! IT SEEMS TO BE GETTING BIGGER! How is this happening?! ** "HELLO, I'M ANN ROMNEY! YOU SHOULD VOTE FOR MY HUSBAND AND HE WILL MAKE ALL OF THE WINDOWS ROLL DOWN IN YOUR PLAAAANES!" ** Also, from the same episode, everything about badgers. --->'''Dara:''' It's the people who are ''killing the badgers''. Why, Mummy? ''Why'', Mummy, are the people ''killing the badgers?'' ** Aaand the plebs.

* [=S13E11=]: [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XSlohNBJnFk The "Private Browsing" discussion]].

* From series 11 episode 10, Ann Romney is an arsonist and Mitt Romney doesn't know much about either airplanes nor fire. [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WIHth_6x4-s#t=17m48s As seen here.]] -->'''Dara''': Douse it in petrol, that will keep it quiet for a while! Old newspapers! Old newspapers! Smother it in shavings of woods! IT SEEMS TO BE GETTING BIGGER! How is this happening?! ** "HELLO, I'M ANN ROMNEY! YOU SHOULD VOTE FOR MY HUSBAND AND HE WILL MAKE ALL OF THE WINDOWS ROLL DOWN IN YOUR PLAAAANES!" ** Also, from the same episode, everything about badgers. --->'''Dara:''' It's the people who are ''killing the badgers''. Why, Mummy? ''Why'', Mummy, are the people ''killing the badgers?'' ** Aaand the plebs. * Greg Davies' impression of Peter Andre. Dara tries to stop him but he keeps going to the point where everyone, Dara included, is absolutely losing their shit laughing. ** In the series 11 outtakes, Chris can't help noticing that Greg's impression of the Queen sounds like his Peter Andre impression, to which Greg responds, in the voice: --->"DON'T COMPARE ME TO THE QUEEN!" * [=S13E11=]: [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XSlohNBJnFk The "Private Browsing" discussion]].

* [=S13E11=]: The "Greek dance" episode. Newcomer Sara Pascoe's analogy comparing the Greek deficit and the EU with a pub and itsstorage of alcohol, which starts becoming [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XSlohNBJnFk The "Private Browsing" discussion]].com/watch?v=c4x1O5EHGhA&t=7m1s ridiculously detailed.]] -->'''Andy''': [[LampshadeHanging And this is supposed to simplify things in your head?]]

* After one early ClipShow showed Dara dancing to the RealShowThemeTune, the ChristmasEpisode of season 14 takes it to its logical conclusion.
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* After one early ClipShow showed Dara dancing to the RealShowThemeTune, RealSongThemeTune, the ChristmasEpisode of season 14 takes it to its logical conclusion.
6th Jan '16 8:56:53 PM ColeNichols
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'''Ed:''' Oh, that's a classic dream. It means you're a pedophile.
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'''Ed:''' Oh, that's a classic dream. It means you're a pedophile.\\
6th Jan '16 8:55:24 PM ColeNichols
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Added DiffLines:
'''Russell:''' I see you've tried to commit suicide five times. Your dad was right. You are useless.
3rd Jan '16 7:28:13 AM LordAaronus
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to:
* After one early ClipShow showed Dara dancing to the RealShowThemeTune, the ChristmasEpisode of season 14 takes it to its logical conclusion.
3rd Jan '16 6:21:04 AM LordAaronus
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* Unlikely Things to Hear on a TV Talent Show -->'''Greg Davies:''' You're right! I ''can't'' sing! Thanks!\\ '''Milton Jones:''' I'd like to dedicate this song to a friend of mine, who was run over last week and is in hospital. ''[singing]'' [[CrossesTheLineTwice The wheels of the bus go round and round, round and round...]]\\ '''Greg Davies:''' Hello! Where's my double act partner? Oh, he's in here. ''(puts microphone to crotch and starts singing "Feelings")''\\ '''Andy Parsons:''' Yes, I have been on the show before. I was once trapped inside somebody else's underpants going, "Feelings..." ** Seann Walsh's [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=T0-lNFITeFA#t=128s SPOT-ON impression of Michael McIntyre.]] ** And from the outtakes: --->'''Greg Davies:''' [[NoIndoorVoice I'M TOM AND THIS IS DAVE, MY DANCING GUINEA PIG!]]\\ ''([[AssShove He mimes sticking the guinea pig onto his thumb.]])''\\ ''(yells off-screen)'' PLAY THE MUSIC! '''''PLAY THE MUSIC!''''' * Unlikely Things to Hear at an Awards Ceremony -->'''Chris:''' [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SJ7K8l03GfU "And the winner is... Dara ” Briain!"]] [[note]]A reference to Dara losing the "Best Entertainment Performance" BAFTA to Graham Norton in spite of the fact that he hosted that year's awards.[[/note]] ** To which Dara responds by simply [[FlippingTheBird flipping Chris off]]. * Other contributions to 'Unlikely Agony Aunt letters', aside from the above: -->'''Zoe Lyons''': "Dear Aunty, I'm a very nervous person and sudden noises really startle me. In fact, [[TemptingFate even if I hear a buzzer a little wee comes out]]." ''[Dara presses the buzzer and Zoe looks distinctly uncomfortable before walking off. Mickey Flanagan bursts out laughing in the meantime.]''\\ '''Alan Cochrane''': "I work in the public sector-" ''[adopts a mocking tone]'' "- and I'm ''really, really, really'' worried about my pension!" ''[He rolls his eyes before walking off.]'' * "Unlikely Lines from a Superhero Movie": -->'''Frankie:''' You're trapped, Spider-Man. Trapped in this enormous bath.\\ '''Andy:''' BIFF, BAM, KAPOW, KNUTTED, BOTTLED, SLASHED!" ** Similar subject a few years later: --->'''Hugh''': Spider-Man is dead. And so is Fly Man, swallowed by There Was an Old Lady Woman.\\ '''Andy''': Spider-Man, Spider-Man, Does whatever a spider can... HELP! I'M STUCK IN A BATH!\\ '''Josh Widdicombe''': A gas leak at the orphanage? Sounds like a job for me, [[TemptingFate The Human Torch]]."

* Unlikely lines to hear in a disaster movie: -->'''Andy Parsons''': "Do you not realise, if this contagion spreads the entire X-Factor judging panel could be wiped out?"\\ ''[Crowd laughs and cheers]'' * Unlikely things to hear on a news programme: --> '''Andy''': "Behind me, a man lies dead. That's what happens if you pull faces in the background when I'm doing a piece to camera." * Ditto, on a science programme: -->'''Milton Jones''': I was the man who discovered DNA. I wasn't going to call it that but I was giving a lecture to the Royal Society and I said, "Gentlemen, I believe I've discovered the genetic fingerprint of all human life ... da-na!"\\ '''Holly:''' Apart from the humans, the only animal to enjoy sex is the dolphin. I had to shag a lot of animals to find that out.\\ '''Russell:''' I'm a meerkat; she's not lying...

* Unlikely things to hear over a tannoy: -->'''Hugh:''' Would the parents of the lost child please pick him up from the meeting point? Music/{{Madonna}} is trying to buy him.\\ '''Chris:''' Would the owners of a black Jaguar please move it, as it's attacking the customers?"\\ '''Hugh:''' Would the man on pump #4 please remove the nozzle from the backside of the man on pump #6?"\\ '''Micky:''' Could the owner of the Ford Fiesta 1100 in the carpark with the tinted windows and the 'Go Faster' stripes - sort your life out, mate, will ya?\\ '''Chris:''' Would the [[Literature/HarryPotter small boy with the owl]] please stop running at the wall between platforms nine and ten?" * Alan Cochrune's contributions to "Unlikely things to hear at Wimbledon": -->"What a fantastic slice! But I do think the All-England club will insist she wears knickers again next year."\\ "And the mound has taken a real pounding in the last fortnight...." ''(He grins guiltily since the reaction is the same as his previous entry; camera cuts to Zoe Lyons who is desperately trying to swallow her laughter)'' "...I think the All-England club are fine with it as long as it doesn't affect her tennis." * '''Seann Walsh''': "And now, Gordon Ramsay's ''Kitchen Nightmares'' [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0nNfmkzqvZc#t=1m48s for the hard of hearing."]] * For the 2013 Christmas special, one of the Scenes We'd Like to See topics was "Unlikely Things to Hear at Christmas Time." The crowd, as expected, responded with groans. --> '''Dara''': "Don't judge me!" ** Immediately after that, Josh Widdicombe's first joke: ---> '''Josh''': "Yes, it's just what I wanted: a Seann Walsh DVD!" *** [[ActuallyPrettyFunny Which made Walsh nearly double over laughing]]. ** Milton Jones' spin on a holiday song: --->'''Milton''': "George Michael, you are accused of organ trafficking. Last Christmas, someone gave you their heart." *** Later, Andy Parsons took another spin on a holiday song: ---->'''Andy''': Last year, I went to Africa. They do know it's Christmas.

* "Commercials That Never Made It To Air" -->'''Andy''': Do you ever have that bloated feeling? Why not try having a shit? * "Unlikely Things for Andy Murray to Think" (keep in mind that Murray and his girlfriend Kim (take note, this is important) is in the audience) -->'''Milton''': ''(TERRIBLE Scottish accent)'' I remember when I used to train -- ''(Dara admonishes him here..."He's in the room!")'' -- I remember when I used to train in Scotland, I was a lot more unhealthy. I used to serve with a potato instead of a ball so I could have lots of chips afterwards!\\ '''Ed ''': Well, now that I've won Wimbledon, they'll at least stop making fun of me.\\ '''Hal Cruttenden''': I wonder if my mom is watching. Of course she is. She's always watching.\\ '''Ed''': I wish Kim would shut up. "Oh, that Ed Byrne, he's so funny!"\\ '''Andy''': I think I saw Ivan Lendl wink. That means he's just ejaculated. (''cut to Kim with her face in both hands'')\\ '''Ed''': Venus has the arse, Serena's got the tits.

* "Unlikely Complaints to TV Channels: -->'''Chris''': Dear Dave: Have you seen Phil? Yours, Bob.\\ '''Chris''': Dear Dave ja vu: Have you seen Phil ja vu? Yours, Bob ja vu. * "Unlikely Things to Hear on ''[[Series/{{CrimewatchUK}} Crimewatch]]''": -->'''Hugh:''' Sometimes victims of crime don't even know they have been robbed because they use the items taken so infrequently. Take Dara ” Briain. Burglars stole his legs six months ago. -->''(Dara looks down, checking if his legs are there)'' * "Unlikely Lines To Hear In a Kids' Film": -->'''Miles Jupp:''' Mary Poppins, I arrest you on suspicion of supercalifragilisticsextrafficking. * "Unlikely Small Ads": -->'''Hugh:''' House prices falling? Debts rising? Feel like you can't quite cope? PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER! * "Things You Wouldn't Hear From a Weather Forecaster": -->'''Russell:''' A hurricane tonight will be caused by low pressure and Godís hatred of homosexuality.\\ '''Hugh:''' Well let's go to Carol on the roof of television center. She's not meant to be there; she's just a bit depressed. ** Same subject a few seasons later... --->'''Ed''': Thanks very much, Dave. Yes, it's pretty much easy reporting on things that have already happened. Now, predicting the future. * "The Worst Thing To Say When Running For U.S. President:" -->'''Hugh:''' ''(with a fake Texas accent)'' Hi there, I'm like GeorgeBush only less intelligent.\\ '''Frankie:''' I will never forget the terrible events of 9-12.\\ '''Andy Parsons:''' Yes I smoked marijuana... and I inhaled... just now...\\ '''Ed Byrne:''' I've got a bad one. Bad one. Whilst at college I did experiment with marijuana. I did it in snow, I did it in sleet, but I did not...[[IncrediblyLamePun in hail]]. ''[[[LamePunReaction dorky dance]]]''

* "Things You Wouldn't Hear at a Party Conference": -->'''Milton:''' Good news if you're a small mother - we are going to raise the mini-mum wage! * "Unlikely Film Trailers": -->'''Milton:''' ''Film/{{Troy}}''. Certificate 15. If you're too young, why don't you make a giant wooden adult... * From series 14 episode 4, the round of "Things You Wouldn't Hear In A Science Documentary" that turned into everybody repeatedly having a go at [[ButtMonkey Dara]]. * From the blown light episode, "Unlikely Things on a Travel Program": -->'''Romesh''': And the wonderful thing about a trip to China is, you get the opportunity to meet the child who made your trousers. (audience reacts) Yeah, I said it! -->'''Romesh''': The weather, the accommodation, the food, all of these wonderful things help you to forget how smelly the locals are. (buzzed) [[CallBack Yeah, I said it!]] -->'''Rob Beckett''': Something about travel. (barely a beat) [[RuleOfThree Yeah, I said it!]] * Series 14, episode 11: "Unlikely Agony Aunt Letters": -->'''Holly:''' ''(visibly pregnant)'' Dear Deirdre, why does semen make you fat? -->'''Rob Beckett:''' Dear Deirdre, I'm not going to beat around the bush. Is there any other tips on satisfying my wife?

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* Unlikely Things to Hear on a TV Talent Show -->'''Greg Davies:''' You're right! I ''can't'' sing! Thanks!\\ '''Milton Jones:''' I'd like to dedicate this song to a friend of mine, who was run over last week and is in hospital. ''[singing]'' [[CrossesTheLineTwice The wheels of the bus go round and round, round and round...]]\\ '''Greg Davies:''' Hello! Where's my double act partner? Oh, he's in here. ''(puts microphone to crotch and starts singing "Feelings")''\\ '''Andy Parsons:''' Yes, I have been on the show before. I was once trapped inside somebody else's underpants going, "Feelings..." ** Seann Walsh's [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=T0-lNFITeFA#t=128s SPOT-ON impression of Michael McIntyre.]] ** And from the outtakes: --->'''Greg Davies:''' [[NoIndoorVoice I'M TOM AND THIS IS DAVE, MY DANCING GUINEA PIG!]]\\ ''([[AssShove He mimes sticking the guinea pig onto his thumb.]])''\\ ''(yells off-screen)'' PLAY THE MUSIC! '''''PLAY THE MUSIC!''''' * Unlikely Things to Hear at an Awards Ceremony -->'''Chris:''' [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SJ7K8l03GfU "And the winner is... Dara ” Briain!"]] [[note]]A reference to Dara losing the "Best Entertainment Performance" BAFTA to Graham Norton in spite of the fact that he hosted that year's awards.[[/note]] ** To which Dara responds by simply [[FlippingTheBird flipping Chris off]]. * Other contributions to 'Unlikely Agony Aunt letters', aside from the above: -->'''Zoe Lyons''': "Dear Aunty, I'm a very nervous person and sudden noises really startle me. In fact, [[TemptingFate even if I hear a buzzer a little wee comes out]]." ''[Dara presses the buzzer and Zoe looks distinctly uncomfortable before walking off. Mickey Flanagan bursts out laughing in the meantime.]''\\ '''Alan Cochrane''': "I work in the public sector-" ''[adopts a mocking tone]'' "- and I'm ''really, really, really'' worried about my pension!" ''[He rolls his eyes before walking off.]'' * "Unlikely Lines from a Superhero Movie": -->'''Frankie:''' You're trapped, Spider-Man. Trapped in this enormous bath.\\ '''Andy:''' BIFF, BAM, KAPOW, KNUTTED, BOTTLED, SLASHED!" ** Similar subject a few years later: --->'''Hugh''': Spider-Man is dead. And so is Fly Man, swallowed by There Was an Old Lady Woman.\\ '''Andy''': Spider-Man, Spider-Man, Does whatever a spider can... HELP! I'M STUCK IN A BATH!\\ '''Josh Widdicombe''': A gas leak at the orphanage? Sounds like a job for me, [[TemptingFate The Human Torch]]." * Unlikely lines to hear in a disaster movie: -->'''Andy Parsons''': "Do you not realise, if this contagion spreads the entire X-Factor judging panel could be wiped out?"\\ ''[Crowd laughs and cheers]'' * Unlikely things to hear on a news programme: --> '''Andy''': "Behind me, a man lies dead. That's what happens if you pull faces in the background when I'm doing a piece to camera." * Ditto, on a science programme: -->'''Milton Jones''': I was the man who discovered DNA. I wasn't going to call it that but I was giving a lecture to the Royal Society and I said, "Gentlemen, I believe I've discovered the genetic fingerprint of all human life ... da-na!"\\ '''Holly:''' Apart from the humans, the only animal to enjoy sex is the dolphin. I had to shag a lot of animals to find that out.\\ '''Russell:''' I'm a meerkat; she's not lying... * Unlikely things to hear over a tannoy: -->'''Hugh:''' Would the parents of the lost child please pick him up from the meeting point? Music/{{Madonna}} is trying to buy him.\\ '''Chris:''' Would the owners of a black Jaguar please move it, as it's attacking the customers?"\\ '''Hugh:''' Would the man on pump #4 please remove the nozzle from the backside of the man on pump #6?"\\ '''Micky:''' Could the owner of the Ford Fiesta 1100 in the carpark with the tinted windows and the 'Go Faster' stripes - sort your life out, mate, will ya?\\ '''Chris:''' Would the [[Literature/HarryPotter small boy with the owl]] please stop running at the wall between platforms nine and ten?" * Alan Cochrune's contributions to "Unlikely things to hear at Wimbledon": -->"What a fantastic slice! But I do think the All-England club will insist she wears knickers again next year."\\ "And the mound has taken a real pounding in the last fortnight...." ''(He grins guiltily since the reaction is the same as his previous entry; camera cuts to Zoe Lyons who is desperately trying to swallow her laughter)'' "...I think the All-England club are fine with it as long as it doesn't affect her tennis." * '''Seann Walsh''': "And now, Gordon Ramsay's ''Kitchen Nightmares'' [[http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0nNfmkzqvZc#t=1m48s for the hard of hearing."]] * For the 2013 Christmas special, one of the Scenes We'd Like to See topics was "Unlikely Things to Hear at Christmas Time." The crowd, as expected, responded with groans. --> '''Dara''': "Don't judge me!" ** Immediately after that, Josh Widdicombe's first joke: ---> '''Josh''': "Yes, it's just what I wanted: a Seann Walsh DVD!" *** [[ActuallyPrettyFunny Which made Walsh nearly double over laughing]]. ** Milton Jones' spin on a holiday song: --->'''Milton''': "George Michael, you are accused of organ trafficking. Last Christmas, someone gave you their heart." *** Later, Andy Parsons took another spin on a holiday song: ---->'''Andy''': Last year, I went to Africa. They do know it's Christmas. * "Commercials That Never Made It To Air" -->'''Andy''': Do you ever have that bloated feeling? Why not try having a shit? * "Unlikely Things for Andy Murray to Think" (keep in mind that Murray and his girlfriend Kim (take note, this is important) is in the audience) -->'''Milton''': ''(TERRIBLE Scottish accent)'' I remember when I used to train -- ''(Dara admonishes him here..."He's in the room!")'' -- I remember when I used to train in Scotland, I was a lot more unhealthy. I used to serve with a potato instead of a ball so I could have lots of chips afterwards!\\ '''Ed ''': Well, now that I've won Wimbledon, they'll at least stop making fun of me.\\ '''Hal Cruttenden''': I wonder if my mom is watching. Of course she is. She's always watching.\\ '''Ed''': I wish Kim would shut up. "Oh, that Ed Byrne, he's so funny!"\\ '''Andy''': I think I saw Ivan Lendl wink. That means he's just ejaculated. (''cut to Kim with her face in both hands'')\\ '''Ed''': Venus has the arse, Serena's got the tits. * "Unlikely Complaints to TV Channels: -->'''Chris''': Dear Dave: Have you seen Phil? Yours, Bob.\\ '''Chris''': Dear Dave ja vu: Have you seen Phil ja vu? Yours, Bob ja vu. * "Unlikely Things to Hear on ''[[Series/{{CrimewatchUK}} Crimewatch]]''": -->'''Hugh:''' Sometimes victims of crime don't even know they have been robbed because they use the items taken so infrequently. Take Dara ” Briain. Burglars stole his legs six months ago. -->''(Dara looks down, checking if his legs are there)'' * "Unlikely Lines To Hear In a Kids' Film": -->'''Miles Jupp:''' Mary Poppins, I arrest you on suspicion of supercalifragilisticsextrafficking. * "Unlikely Small Ads": -->'''Hugh:''' House prices falling? Debts rising? Feel like you can't quite cope? PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER! * "Things You Wouldn't Hear From a Weather Forecaster": -->'''Russell:''' A hurricane tonight will be caused by low pressure and Godís hatred of homosexuality.\\ '''Hugh:''' Well let's go to Carol on the roof of television center. She's not meant to be there; she's just a bit depressed. ** Same subject a few seasons later... --->'''Ed''': Thanks very much, Dave. Yes, it's pretty much easy reporting on things that have already happened. Now, predicting the future. * "The Worst Thing To Say When Running For U.S. President:" -->'''Hugh:''' ''(with a fake Texas accent)'' Hi there, I'm like GeorgeBush only less intelligent.\\ '''Frankie:''' I will never forget the terrible events of 9-12.\\ '''Andy Parsons:''' Yes I smoked marijuana... and I inhaled... just now...\\ '''Ed Byrne:''' I've got a bad one. Bad one. Whilst at college I did experiment with marijuana. I did it in snow, I did it in sleet, but I did not...[[IncrediblyLamePun in hail]]. ''[[[LamePunReaction dorky dance]]]'' * "Things You Wouldn't Hear at a Party Conference": -->'''Milton:''' Good news if you're a small mother - we are going to raise the mini-mum wage! * "Unlikely Film Trailers": -->'''Milton:''' ''Film/{{Troy}}''. Certificate 15. If you're too young, why don't you make a giant wooden adult... * From series 14 episode 4, the round of "Things You Wouldn't Hear In A Science Documentary" that turned into everybody repeatedly having a go at [[ButtMonkey Dara]]. * From the blown light episode, "Unlikely Things on a Travel Program": -->'''Romesh''': And the wonderful thing about a trip to China is, you get the opportunity to meet the child who made your trousers. (audience reacts) Yeah, I said it! -->'''Romesh''': The weather, the accommodation, the food, all of these wonderful things help you to forget how smelly the locals are. (buzzed) [[CallBack Yeah, I said it!]] -->'''Rob Beckett''': Something about travel. (barely a beat) [[RuleOfThree Yeah, I said it!]] * Series 14, episode 11: "Unlikely Agony Aunt Letters": -->'''Holly:''' ''(visibly pregnant)'' Dear Deirdre, why does semen make you fat? -->'''Rob Beckett:''' Dear Deirdre, I'm not going to beat around the bush. Is there any other tips on satisfying my wife?
2nd Jan '16 9:40:25 PM LordAaronus
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* "The Siamese twins were joined at the most embarrassing place imaginable, and known by friends as 'the skipping rope'." ** Andy's reaction makes it even funnier. The crowd is still laughing at Hugh's joke. Andy walks up to the mike, looks back and forth a couple times, shrugs *buzz* and walks off.
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* "Tara removes her top to reveal a horrifying skin infection. Look away now if you're eating Rice Krispies." Cue groans from the audience and an undignified "pfftt" from one of the guys. ** "The Siamese twins were joined at the most embarrassing place imaginable, and known by friends as 'the skipping rope'." ** *** You can make out an undignified cackle from Andi Osho amidst the laughter. Andy's reaction makes it even funnier. The crowd is still laughing at Hugh's joke. Andy walks up to the mike, looks back and forth a couple times, shrugs *buzz* and walks off.
28th Dec '15 3:35:14 AM LordAaronus
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(''light goes off, show momentarily grinds to a halt'')
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(''light goes off, show momentarily grinds to a halt'')halt'')\\
This list shows the last 10 events of 309. Show all.