History DeadpanSnarker / HarryPotter

30th Apr '16 9:38:20 AM AnonFangeekGirl
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'''Harry:''' We got lost.
'''[=McGonagall=]:''' Then perhaps a map?

to:

'''Harry:''' --->'''Harry:''' We got lost.
'''[=McGonagall=]:''' --->'''[=McGonagall=]:''' Then perhaps a map?
30th Apr '16 9:37:49 AM AnonFangeekGirl
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to:

** After Harry and Ron are late to class:




to:

'''Harry:''' We got lost.
'''[=McGonagall=]:''' Then perhaps a map?
30th Apr '16 9:35:48 AM AnonFangeekGirl
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---> '''Harry:''' Interesting theory. Has anyone ever tried sticking a sword in Voldemort? Maybe the Ministry should put some people onto that, instead of wasting their time stripping down Deluminators or covering up breakouts from Azkaban.

to:

---> '''Harry:''' Interesting theory. Has anyone ever tried [[MundaneSolution sticking a sword in Voldemort? Voldemort?]] Maybe the Ministry should put some people onto that, instead of wasting their time stripping down Deluminators or covering up breakouts from Azkaban.
1st Apr '16 5:42:16 PM Eievie
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Almost all of the Characters in Harry Potter as well as the author are very snarky. A few specific examples:

to:

Almost all of the Characters characters in Harry Potter as ''Harry Potter''--as well as the author are author--are very snarky. A few specific examples:



---> '''2nd Weasley Twin:''' Hang on, I think I remember him saying something about it. Once -
---> '''1st Weasley Twin:''' Or twice -
---> '''2nd Weasley Twin:''' A minute -
---> '''1st Weasley Twin:''' All summer -

to:

---> '''2nd Weasley Twin:''' Hang on, I think I remember him saying something about it. Once -
Once--
---> '''1st Weasley Twin:''' Or twice -
twice--
---> '''2nd Weasley Twin:''' A minute -
minute--
---> '''1st Weasley Twin:''' All summer - summer--



---> '''Moody:''' Arthur and Fred –

to:

---> '''Moody:''' Arthur and Fred – Fred--



---> '''Moody''' Sorry, George –
---> '''Fred:''' I’m only yanking your wand, I’m Fred really –

to:

---> '''Moody''' Sorry, George –
George--
---> '''Fred:''' I’m only yanking your wand, I’m Fred really – really--



---> '''Harry:''' “And they’d love to have me,” said Harry sarcastically. “We’d be best pals if they didn’t keep trying to do me in.”

to:

---> '''Harry:''' “And And they’d love to have me,” said Harry sarcastically. “We’d me. We’d be best pals if they didn’t keep trying to do me in.



---> '''Scrimgeour:''' Why do you think -
---> '''Harry:''' Dumbledore would have given me the sword? [[note]] of Gryffindor[[/note]] ...Maybe he thought it would look nice on my wall.
---> '''Scrimgeour:''' This is not a joke, Potter! ...Did he give you that sword, Potter, because he believed, as do many, [[TheChosenOne that you are the one destined to destroy He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named?]]

to:

---> '''Scrimgeour:''' Why do you think -
think--
---> '''Harry:''' Dumbledore would have given me the sword? [[note]] of Gryffindor[[/note]] ...Maybe Gryffindor[[/note]] …maybe he thought it would look nice on my wall.
---> '''Scrimgeour:''' This is not a joke, Potter! ...Did did he give you that sword, Potter, because he believed, as do many, [[TheChosenOne that you are the one destined to destroy He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named?]]



---> '''Umbridge:''' I was just wondering, Professor, whether you received my note telling you of the date and time of your inspec –?

to:

---> '''Umbridge:''' I was just wondering, Professor, whether you received my note telling you of the date and time of your inspec –?inspec--?



---> '''[=McGonagall=]:''' Potter has achieved high marks in all his Defense Against the Dark Arts tests-

to:

---> '''[=McGonagall=]:''' Potter has achieved high marks in all his Defense Against the Dark Arts tests-tests--



---> '''[=McGonagall=]:''' I should have made my meaning plainer. He has achieved high marks in all Defense Against the Dark Arts tests set by a competent teacher.[[note]]For an extra burn, 'competant teacher' can pretty much only be in reference to [[OurWerewolvesAreDifferent Remus Lupin]], who Umbridge [[FantasticRacism particularly hates]].[[/note]]

to:

---> '''[=McGonagall=]:''' I should have made my meaning plainer. He has achieved high marks in all Defense Against the Dark Arts tests set by a competent teacher.[[note]]For an extra burn, 'competant teacher' "competent teacher" can pretty much only be in reference to [[OurWerewolvesAreDifferent Remus Lupin]], who Umbridge [[FantasticRacism particularly hates]].[[/note]]



---> '''Hermione:''' I know what this is -- it's devil's snare!

to:

---> '''Hermione:''' I know what this is -- it's is--it's devil's snare!



---> '''Hagrid:''' I — I’ve been away for me health.

to:

---> '''Hagrid:''' I — I’ve I--I’ve been away for me health.



---> '''Hagrid:''' Yeah, bit o’ — o’ fresh air, yeh know —

to:

---> '''Hagrid:''' Yeah, bit o’ — o’ o’--o’ fresh air, yeh know —know--



-->'''Uncle Vernon''': I am not aware that it is any of your business what goes on in my house—

to:

-->'''Uncle Vernon''': I am not aware that it is any of your business what goes on in my house—house--



-->"[[Literature/HarryPotterAndTheHalfBloodPrince Book Six]] is called ''The Toenail of Icklibõgg''—Well, if you believed the '[Pillar of] Storgé' one..."

to:

-->"[[Literature/HarryPotterAndTheHalfBloodPrince Book Six]] is called ''The Toenail of Icklibõgg''—Well, Icklibõgg''--Well, if you believed the '[Pillar of] Storgé' one..."
1st Jan '16 4:30:05 AM Lazarus393
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** In ''Sorcerer's/Philospher's Stone'':

to:

** In ''Sorcerer's/Philospher's ''Sorcerer's/Philosopher's Stone'':
20th Sep '15 7:08:18 AM bjshipley1
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-->'''Harry:''' Hang on, there's an empty chair at the staff table. Where's Snape?\\

to:

-->'''Harry:''' --->'''Harry:''' Hang on, there's an empty chair at the staff table. Where's Snape?\\
20th Sep '15 7:07:39 AM bjshipley1
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Added DiffLines:

** In the book version of ''[[Literature/HarryPotterAndTheChamberOfSecrets Chamber of Secrets]]'', pulling off a classic RightBehindMe on Harry and Ron::
-->'''Harry:''' Hang on, there's an empty chair at the staff table. Where's Snape?\\
'''Ron:''' Maybe he's ill!\\
'''Harry:''' Maybe he ''left'', because he missed out on the Defence Against the Dark Arts job ''again''!\\
'''Ron:''' Or he might have been ''sacked''! I mean, everyone hates him--\\
'''Snape:''' ''(from behind them)'' Or ''maybe'' he's waiting to hear why you two didn't arrive on the school train.
5th Sep '15 10:40:03 PM teddybear334
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Added DiffLines:

** Later in the same conversation:
---> '''Harry:'''Not as stupid as you look, are you, Dud? But I s'pose, if you were, you wouldn’t be able to walk and talk at the same time.
** And:
---> '''Harry:''' Yeah? Did he say you look like a pig that’s been taught to walk on its hind legs? ‘Cause that’s not cheek, Dud, that’s true…


Added DiffLines:

** And later in that same conversation:
---> '''Draco:''' You think you’re such a big man, Potter. You wait. I’ll have you. You can’t land my father in prison.
---> '''Harry:''' I thought I just had.


Added DiffLines:

** When Hermione suggests that while she herself is muggleborn and therefore disqualified from being a Death Eater, Ron and Harry are pureblood enough to qualify:
---> '''Harry:''' “And they’d love to have me,” said Harry sarcastically. “We’d be best pals if they didn’t keep trying to do me in.”
23rd Jun '15 1:55:37 PM tranz2deep
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Added DiffLines:

*** Given it's fall in Scotland at that point, this is more than a bit of a sucker bet...
21st Apr '15 10:12:35 AM rjd1922
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* Mad Eye Moody

to:

* Mad Eye Mad-Eye Moody



-->'''Mad Eye''': I expect what you're not aware of would fill several books, Dursley.

to:

-->'''Mad Eye''': -->'''Mad-Eye''': I expect what you're not aware of would fill several books, Dursley.
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